Sleepy Insomniac

Taste the Rainbow

Chapter 2

John wasn’t in any hurry; he knew he fucked up his life long ago. Moving any faster would only speed up the process.

Standing outside his old, beat-up Subaru parked near the street’s curb, he just stood there staring, thinking. Did Linda have Megan this weekend? He couldn’t remember. He was late, anyway. Late as fucking usual.

The school rested far in front of him, behind one of those circle drive things with a small courtyard built inside of the area the streets encapsulated. All the cars were gone by now, long gone, leaving the area vacant with nothing but the groupings of pine trees that outlined the campus and the rolling green graze fields in the various distances. John just stood there with his hands in his pockets, caught up in that daze he often found himself in as of late. He still had his business suit on, or at least something passable; uninspired, the simple white collar shirt, khaki pants and plain loafers screamed workplace monotony. His tie was OK, even though it looked a little funny there, flapping in the breeze.

John turned to get into his car when he caught site of a young girl sitting under one of the campus trees. She didn’t seem to notice him; she just sat there, like she was watching morning cartoons or something. John glanced around, but he didn’t need to; he knew no one was there. The way it looked, no one would be there for a long time.

He remembered stories he heard throughout his life, men that would snatch children after school and do God knows what with them. Demons, monsters. John felt a little unsure about checking on her, but he knew if the morning news headlined a missing child report, he’d feel something a hell of a lot worse. He did feel sure about one thing, though: he wasn’t a monster. Taking his hands out of his pockets, he casually trekked towards the large pine tree the girl was under.

Nearly reaching her, a stick snapped under his shoe. Her head darted over; eyes caught in-between shock and a tired haze. John reflexively held his hand up, as if to stay her like a wild animal frightened to the point of running off.

“Hey, it’s alright, I’m just seeing if your ride’s coming,” John said in the friendliest voice he could muster. The girl sat there for a second with that startled, confused look still showing through, allowing John the time to get a good look at her. The pace of his breathing increased a little; he didn’t expect her to be so…gorgeous, really. Her dark brunette hair, loosely held together by a wood-streaked plastic clip, was the immediate starting point. Everything she wore matched it, with a neckline on her black cotton blouse matching her eye color, more of a dark brown and intoxicating to gaze into.

After overcoming her initial panic, she smiled a little and gave a genuine laugh that sounded musical, all the while covering her mouth with her hands out of embarrassment. Her smile still seeped through her fingers. John felt a flush run through his chest, but he ignored the feeling and carried on with his expected adult responsibilities.

“What’s your name?” John asked, politely. The girl let down her hands from her mouth, half-smiling still. She stood up, wrangling her way up off the ground as she did, and immediately turned her attention to her backside where she softly brushed away dead pine needles from her butt. She was wearing a simple, black skirt. It wasn’t super short, but John was no less affected by its allure. As much as he tried not to, his eyes drifted down her small, streamlined body. Her hand, elegant and tender, lightly brushed against the fabric, giving brief glimpses of the smooth curvature her bottom possessed. Just above, her blouse hugged her waist, showcasing her thin, sexy frame. A little skin from her stomach peeked through.

Seeing this, John forgot where he was…and the hand stopped. His eyes shifted back to her face and she was staring at him. She had clearly caught him looking. He quickly brushed off her shoulder, trying to play it off like he was helping her.

“You had a little…it’s OK, it’s gone now,” John stammered out. Ashley knowingly smiled, giving John another flush in his chest. She reached out with her right hand, the same hand she was brushing her bottom with.

“Hi, I’m Ashley,” she said. Her voice was lovely and surprisingly mature for her age. John reached out with an awkward rhythm and took her hand. She held his hand tighter than he held hers, even though her hand couldn’t fully grip his own. Her fingers felt small, but smooth while lightly rubbing against his skin as they shook hands. He had a strong desire to kiss it, like gentlemen used to do during romantic courtships. He knew that wouldn’t be wise; Linda would have a field day if somebody saw them and it got out. John regained some of his composure, reminding himself why he was speaking to her in the first place. He pulled his hand back and tried to not let his interest in her carry over to his voice.

“I didn’t want to leave without making sure you had a ride…and it looks like it might rain. Are your parents running late or something?” Ashley rolled her eyes. John thought this made her look silly, but also amazingly cute at the same time. Her face was angelic, soft lips with a delicate chin and faint dimples in her cheeks when she grinned. Her skin was full of youth, the skin that women work diligently every day to maintain, but girls like her simply have. Dark, wispy bangs cradled her face on one side.

“Yeah…my dad…he’s not the most dependable chauffer,” Ashley replied, again with that womanly cadence mixed with a young girl’s timbre. John was hypnotized by it.

“Are you offering?” Ashley asked with a sly tone blatantly injected into the question. John felt enough sparks come from this he could’ve ignited and a million little images popped into his head, images of him on top of her right there, on the grass in broad daylight, thrusting deep and hard inside of her with her dark skirt lifted up, her blouse riding up her stomach and her face rubbing in rhythm against his chest, moaning approvingly.

John quickly tried to shake this off, both mentally and physically; a bulge started to show through his khakis. This couldn’t be good; people go to jail for just being accused of molestation. Fantasizing about her was the first step to losing everything he had. But then John remembered; he didn’t have much. Linda took most of it and his daughter forgot he existed. And here he was, getting an erection from a girl probably the same age as his daughter. What a fucking loser, John thought.

Still, John mulled over the insinuation. Are you offering? It was simple, they had only spoken a few words, but John knew what an invitation sounded like. She was young and it could’ve been an innocent comment, but it was her tone that gave him the idea. Not the ‘I Want To Have Sex’ tone, but the ‘I Want To Get Fucked’ tone. It was a difficult idea for John to take seriously.

“How old are you?” John asked, frankly.

“Oh, 18,” Ashley stated, lie firmly embedded in the sarcasm. John couldn’t believe it: she was coming on to him. But what he really couldn’t believe was the rush he was getting from it all. Every awkward glance at her fragile neck, ears and lips only dug the knife further into his chest and groin. However, he didn’t allow himself to commit what his body so desperately wanted. He wasn’t going to egg her on. John remembered: unlike those other men, he wasn’t a monster.

“Right…I’m going to go make a phone call…if you need to use my phone to call your parents, just ask. I need to be somewhere, so it’s probably a good idea you do.” John turned to leave and Ashley suddenly gripped his arm. John turned back in surprise.

“No…just…ok, listen,” Ashley’s tone shifted as she said this; less bullshit to more matter-of-fact.

“I’m 11,” Ashley said looking past him, “and my mom died when I was 2, so I only have one parent.” Her voice hinted more, nearly pleading, almost to say Remember…I’m still a little girl. A little shame fell over John.

“I’m sorry,” he said. Ashley merely nodded. She looked up at him. That playful look was gone from her eyes now replaced by something else. She looked vulnerable.

“Can you please take me home? My dad’s….he’s not coming.” Her tone was serious, traces of hidden pain seeping through. At once, John figured some of it out; she’s had a rough life, despite the impressions she gives off. She’s probably just like that and he might’ve assumed some things. Now, he felt like an idiot.

“Sure, I’ll take you home,” John said softly. Ashley smiled, more of a thankful smile than before, but no less beautiful. John’s heart still lurched.

Ashley gently let go of his arm and started to make way to his car. John glanced around and noticed she didn’t have a backpack.

“Where’s your stuff?” John asked.

“What stuff?” She replied, facing him.

“You know, like a book bag? Or books, even?” John felt a little odd having to ask this. You never see a kid her age without something to lug around after school, at least in this town.

“I don’t really need them,” Ashley hinted.

“What do you mean?” John asked.

“I just don’t need them,” Ashley hinted again. John was a little confused by this.

“Don’t you need, like, pencils and paper?” John’s voice drifted slightly as he said this. Ashley smiled at him.

“Teachers don’t have me do homework or anything…they say I make the other students look bad. I usually just sit out in the hall during exams.” Then, John got more of it, where she was coming from. Ashley was gifted, that much was obvious now; it explained why she acted so mature. He didn’t feel as bad now, which was a relief. He may have gotten an erection from an 11-year-old, but it was because she reminded him of a mature, intelligent, unbelievably gorgeous woman unfortunately trapped in an 11-year-old’s body. That much was certain. Now, he just needed to get her home.

Ashley grinned a little and started walking to his car again. John gazed at her while she took unhurried steps, as if she was waiting for him to catch up to her. Her dark hair swayed with the trees as her skirt hugged the side of her left thigh, revealing the light tone her already perfect legs possessed. John noticed her dark slip-on shoes over her little feet and could tell were lightly embroidered, even from that distance. She held her arms behind her back, grasping the wrist of one hand with the other as she walked, looking down and kicking a pine cone like lazy soccer practice. With the line of trees surrounding her and the rolling hills falling far into the distance, everything about her, who she was and how she made John feel, was serene.

I don’t care what others say, she’s fucking gorgeous. Not just for an 11-year-old, she’s just that, a gorgeous human being. I’d give up everything I have in life right now to run up there, rip her clothes off, and fuck her right where she stands.

John shook his head, amazed at the thoughts his mind just produced. Fuck her? He wasn’t going to do that. Monsters do that. He wasn’t a monster.

But I want to be.

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