Where My Lust Comes From

by AnonLust

This story is mine. I wrote it from my own thoughts. It is not to be published without my permission.

At my age, I have spent a lot of time looking back on my life, and trying to figure out how I because the pedophile woman I am. My name is Kathrin and I am a highly sexualized Single mother of 3 Children. So far this is the story of how I became who I am today. Well, some of the story anyhow. I may fill in some gaps later, I don't know yet.

In all of my 34 years I have never had what people would call a normal life. My mother died when I was just 5 in a car accident, which left my father in a downward spiral of sorts for about 3 years. She was the love of his life and without her, he couldn't handle the household chores, and us children by himself. I had an older sister that was 15 when my mother died and she took care of us until I was 8 and she was 18. She left to go to college and my father and I were left alone. Both my sister and I were good kids, never got into much trouble and did all of our homework, as well as schoolwork. My sister even graduated college valedictorian and had a full scholarship to a major University. By age 8 I was able to do the laundry, cook small meals, and keep the house fairly clean. He still did little more than go to work, and drink. My father was an investment banker and made very good money so as long as he didn't mess his job up we would be very well off. With the help of his friends he invested his own money well and prospered.

After about 6 weeks of my sister being gone, my grades slipped a little which upset my father. He blamed himself for leaving me to do all the house work as well as keep up my grades. His response to this was to hire a nanny for me. She was someone to do the house work, cooking cleaning and the like so I could keep up with my schoolwork. Her name was Anne Dennson, and she was such a beautiful woman. In her 30s I believe and very well endowed with large breasts, milky white skin and a perfect waist. This was just the solution because within another 6 weeks my grades were back to normal. This also gave me considerable free time, so I filled that by helping Anne with her chores. We became very close over a short period of time and when the chores were done she would help me with my bath. We would play and splash and she would get wet. During this play time, I could see a different look in her eye. A look that made me vibrate to my soul. One night after a few moments of this playing and splashing, she was soaking wet, so I suggested she take off her clothes and get in the bath with me. I had seen her nude before, walking into her room and she never covered to hide her sexy body from me. So without much more than the suggestion, she disrobed and climbed into the bath with me. I didn't recognize it at the time, but the look in her eyes was pure lust. After a few more moments of splashing and playing she told me it was time to wash but that we could play afterward. I took my sponge and lathered it up and began to wash, but after only a few strokes to clean my body she took it started washing me. I really enjoyed this, partly because since my mother died I had not gotten any motherly attention. My sister was busy taking care of my father and me so she had little time to be motherly toward me. As Anne washed my flat boy like chest we both became quiet. We looked into each other's eyes, and I could see her becoming more and more sensual. I could feel the scrape of the loofa across my tender little girl nipples, it felt like electric shocks shooting strait to my little pussy. I had learned well before this that touching myself on my pussy would bring great joy, but I had never even considered someone else touching me there, but as she washed my chest, she slowly eased downward to my virgin hood. As she touched my pussy, my breath stuck in my throat. I didn't breathe, for fear she would stop if I made any sort of movement. She leaned into me and whispered into my ear, "breathe child" as she pulled me closer to her and stroked my pussy faster and faster still. The breath rushed out of me, and I sucked another in just as fast...my knees became weak and I became dizzy as black spots were before my eyes. I shuddered and then it was nothing but black. I came too, only seconds later in my beloved Anne's arms, as she stroked my hair and smiled down to me. I asked her in a soft tired voice what happened, and she began to explain to me that I had just experience my first orgasm. I knew nothing of what that was due to my youth so I questioned her about it. I asked in haste spitting out one question after another, making Anne laugh while I talked. She told me she would explain this all in time and that she was so very happy that I was willing to explore these new experiences with her. Then she said it was time to get out of the bath and we could talk more about it as we dressed for bed.

My father, whom still was drinking a lot at the time paid little to no mind to how close Anne and I had become and we blossomed into a loving relationship over the next two years. I would guess over those two years, my father believed I had taken to her as a mother figure. I suppose I had, as well as a teacher and a lover. She would teach me how to please myself, as well as other people. When my father would leave for business Anne's friends would come to spend the night with us. Sometimes there would be young boys, adult men, young girls or adult women. Those however are exploits for another story.

When I was about 10 years old, I told Anne about a fantasy I had a few times about my father. You see he was always sad, and it broke my heart that he lived and worked in such sadness. In this fantasy of mine I would go into his room, and find him, drunk and passed out. His pillow stained with tears where he had cried himself to sleep still missing my mother. I would find him in his boxer shorts uncovered, and his manly dick poking out of the slot in front. I would sit there for a few moments and just look at it. The lust building in me until I opened my mouth and sucked on the head of his dick till it got hard. My mouth watering and drool escaping mixed with his pre-cum while I sucked him off, him not waking him until the moment he would ejaculate into my mouth. As his drunken eyes cleared he would grab me, and pull me into his bed and we would make love the rest of the night. As I would tell her this story, she would play with her pussy, cumming over and over again. She would tell me how hearing that story would turn her on and how she would do anything to help me accomplish this very thing. It would be just before my 11th birthday that this very thing would happen and my dreams of making my father happy again would come true.

One night, late, as Anne and I are cuddling in bed we begin to talk about my fantasy again. This time as I start to talk about it, instead of the usual masturbating that Anne would do she stops me. She tells me that my father is passed out from drinking and in his room with the door open. Further he is in his boxers and I should go in there and see where it will lead. I sit there for a minute, thinking to myself that I can't do this, but every so caring Anne encourages me to go ahead and try, and that she will be hiding outside the room if things went bad in order to rush in and save me. Nervously I tip-toed into my father's room and quietly knelt down in front of where the slit in his boxers opened up just enough to show my father's dick, resting and waiting for my watering mouth. As he shifted in is sleep, my heart stopped. At first I thought he was waking up, but then as I looked back at his boxers, I saw his member poking out, just how I had fantasized. I didn't know if I could go through with this, I looked to the door where my beloved Anne was peeking in on me. I saw her hand down the front of her panties, under her robe. She smiled at me, instantly calming me down which gave me the confidence I needed to do what was to come next.

I slowly leaned in and cautiously licked the underside of the head, sparking a soft groan from my father, which only encouraged me more. Next I engulfed the head of his dick in my mouth, sucking softly, on it as it grew harder and harder. I would take more of it into my mouth. Though I am by this point pretty skilled at the art of giving head, my nerves and the size of my father's cock prevented me from actually taking it all in. I closed my eyes though and enjoyed it none the less, savoring the flavor of my father's pre-cum as some dripped down my chin. With my eyes closed, I can imagine my Anne rubbing her clit watching this show engulfed in the same kind of lust that overtook her then day we bathed together when I was only 8. This only fueled my passions, so I picked up my pace, sucking his cock while reaching into his boxers and teasing the underside of his balls. While noticing this I felt his ball begin to tighten up. Realizing he is about to cum, I opened my eyes so I could see his body convulse as he came, and I saw his eyes were wide open. Watching me there on my knees pulling his seed from its own source with a look of excited desire on his face, as I do my very best to swallow every drop of his load. I fail at this slightly as some gets on my night shirt.

When it was all over, my father was still. I didn't move from where I was sitting, and just whispered to him. "Daddy...may I come cuddle with you?"...."Yes" he said softly. So I moved and climbed into bed with him. As he lay there silently I told him excited as only a child could be about my Anne and the bath from when I was 8, and how I have wanted nothing more for as long as I could remember to make him happy as my mother had before the accident. After my excited story he smiled at me and told me he loved me, and would do anything for me. He said he was sorry for being lost for all this time, and that he would do all he could to be better from here forth. I yelled for Anne and she stepped into the room. She still had her hand in her panties but now her robe was open. That night we all three made love in that bed that my father used to share with my mother. And from that day on there was a loving and very sexual relationship between all three of us. That is until my father's death, when I was 22.

This is my very first story to be posted publicly. I wrote it in a short time, and plan on continuing if I get positive feedback from it.