Thesis Topic 23
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Part 1
Lillian was
the first to enter the small auditorium of the university. She was very
nervous. Today the 30 students pursuing a psychology degree will be assigned their
thesis topic by a draw. It was the first year that the students didn’t choose
their own topics. The previous year there were a couple of cases of academic
fraud. In both cases the students confessed they had proposed a subject for
which they knew the existence of an unpublished research paper. There were
rumors that the practice was frequent. That scandal leaded the college
authorities to choose a draw to avoid such kind of plagiarism.
Lillian was
nervous and disappointed, the uncertainty was killing her. She was used
to carefully plan every detail of her career and her life. She was a very
focused girl, even a single minded one. Everything she did she did it for
a purpose, always putting little pieces together to build the future that she
had envisioned for herself. At 21 she was the youngest senior student and her grades were probably the best of her
class. She was a pretty girl, with a slim figure and beautiful legs, her
breasts were small but perky and she had a beautiful, innocent looking face
with green eyes and long red hair that made her very attractive. In spite of
her beauty she rarely dated. As everything in her life she had planned ahead
the kind of man that she wanted and won’t date anybody that doesn’t fit that
profile.
She was
trying to figure up how this random thesis will fit in her plans. Many of her
classmates were interested in the clinical and sociological aspect of
psychology but she despised those areas. She wanted to use her knowledge of the
human mind to build a successful business career. She had planned to do
her thesis about the traits that made women succeed in business and politics,
as a matter of fact she was already familiar of previous research and theories
and had made a list of relevant persons that she wanted to interview for her
own research.
As part of
her career plan, Lillian had applied for an internship at Johnson & Carter, a very important personal recruitment
firm and she got the position in spite of her young age. Her plan was to
acquire experience and become very successful at predicting people success,
especially women success. Her thesis and her access to hundreds of personal
files will help her a lot. She had planned that after 5 years she will write
her first book and then she will start consulting human resources departments
all around the country. At any time she will find a business man that would be
wealthy enough and a true gentleman that respected and encouraged her wish to
develop her own successful career. She wanted the man to be wealthy not to
maintain her but as a measure of success and self confidence and as mean to
contribute with the right connections to push her own career.
The
auditorium started to fill with students, everybody was talking animatedly.
Lillian was quiet and fidgeted from one leg to another while biting her lower
lip, she looked cute. Today she had rushed to the university and wasn’t dressed
in her usual business-like attires. She was wearing a t-shirt, jeans, snickers
and no makeup at all and looked like a high school girl more than a senior
college student. She hated her childish looks. She was the youngest in her
class and looking even younger than she was only contributed to make her feel
like she didn’t belong which caused her some insecurities, that
was why she always wore serious clothes, high heels and expertly applied
makeup, specially to cover the freckles that still decorated her cheekbones and
nose making her feel like a school girl.
In the last
few weeks every graduating student had proposed a research topic and had made
the sustentations of why that topic was relevant. Lillian had debated with
herself if she should propose her favorite subject or not. It was very unlikely
that she was assigned it and the possibility of other girl doing it made her
jealous, but at the end she resolved that even a tiny chance was better than
nothing and she found some relief thinking that her subject could be assigned
to a male student, specially the machos like John Wallace, “That will teach
them some respect for accomplished women”, she thought.
The teacher
entered the room and without saying a word he waited patiently until all the
talking and whispering ceased completely. He put 30 identical envelopes and a
bunch of printed sheets on the desk, and then turning to see the students he
finally said.
“I have
this list with your names that was sorted randomly with a procedure approved by
the statistical department chief to be as fair as possible. When I call your
name, you will come to my desk and you will choose and envelope, any envelope,
you will write your name and the number of the envelope in this form and you
will sign it, then you will leave the room and only then, you will open the
envelope. This form states your acceptance of the topic. You may reject
the subject and try again next semester but the failed thesis will be on your
record and remember that you have only two chances to accomplish your thesis.
Is everything clear?”
After a few
questions everybody got the procedure and the draw started. After just 5
students, Lillian was called, she looked at the
envelopes hesitantly. “Which one is my proposal?”, she thought, “Well, it is
impossible to know, I just hope that I get a good topic, one that let me shine,
a paper that could kick start my career”.
“Please Ms.
Gordon, hurry with your pick there are 25 students waiting”.
Lillian
picked the one in the center of the pile of envelopes and quickly filled her
form. “Lillian Gordon, Thesis Topic: 23”. Lillian signed it and filled with
apprehension and curiosity she left the room as fast as she could.
Once
outside the room she opened her envelope:
“Assessment and Identification of core
psychological features of young females working for the pornographic
industry using a case study approach”
Lillian was
red with shame and rage. “This is surely the idea of a stupid bastard like John
Wallace. He surely wanted to have the opportunity to interview a porno star
with the excuse of a psychological research. This topic is stupid and a drag
and …. And it will be a shame to show in my curriculum. And What
will I get from talking with those low life scums?
Nothing! Shit!”.
Lillian
went home and tried to plan a way out. She had her first thesis counseling
meeting in a couple of days and she wanted to change her situation. She
analyzed her possibilities.
“I can’t
simply drop the topic, I would lose a semester and my almost certain cum
laude. I may try to discredit the topic so it is declared unprofessional
or something but a panel had already revised and approved every proposed
subject. I can’t allege religious reasons because to be admitted to this
university I already signed that I won’t claim such a thing.”, Lillian saw no
doors opened but she resolved, “I will try to get some sympathy from my thesis
counselor and get her help to find a method to change the subject, I will
suggest all these options maybe she could find a way to twist one of them into
a feasible argument”.
But a
couple of days later her counselor was talking calmly with her, ”No Lillian, there is no way to change the assigned
subject, the rules are made to that objective.”, she was thinking, “Not to
mention that I was the thesis counselor of one of the cheating students of the
last year, and I barely avoided an investigation. Trying to change the subject
of my pupil will look very bad”.
Lillian was
on the verge of crying she was trapped with that stupid topic. She opted for
her last resource, “Ms.Barbara, may I at least change
the research approach. I could make a very interesting meta-study, I already
have several hypothesis that could be better proven by a meta-study than by and
individual interview.”
Barbara
Smith made a hand motion signaling Lillian to continue. “I have the hypothesis
that the girls in that industry have sociological drawbacks but psychologically
are people with low self-stem, maybe low IQ and no academic achievements and
lacking clear goals for their lives, promiscuous people that most probably
initiated sex life at a very short age in relationships without love. They most
probably have a strong tendency to exhibitionism . I
also think that they are easily manipulated thanks to their lack of goals and
sense of direction as well as their poor will power. They were surely rose by
dysfunctional families”
Barbara
nodded slightly, she was a good psychologist, she was
used listen the other people until they finish exposing their ideas.
Lillian
continued, “I could make an extensive analysis of other people’s researches, a
meta-study, to see if my hypothesis could be proven thru them”. Lillian was
satisfied with her exposition, if she could not avoid that horrid topic, she
could at least do it in the most detached way. She knew that doing a lot of
library work wasn’t as exciting as doing some real field research, and she knew
that people in the field didn’t give too much professional value to this kind
of research, they often called those meta studies “high school papers”, but given the subject she considered it a lot better
alternative than expend weeks interviewing some bimbo.
Barbara
silently analyzed the possibilities for a few minutes then said, “It would be a
disappointment that such a brilliant student as you do a lame approach to an
interesting subject. I think that the case study approach could suggest another causes than the stereotypes that you described. A
meta study will simply make you walk the same trails that everybody else walked
before, a case study approach on the other hand could lead you to find some new
avenues for studies and researches that other students could continue after
you”.
“But Ms.
Barbara….”, Lillian was pale, she never considered that she couldn’t get even
this little concession, and was about to argument in favor of her proposal but
this time Barbara decided to interrupt her, “Listen Lillian, I know that you feel
uncomfortable with sexual subjects. I noticed since the first semesters that
you had always a very clinic, very detached approach to the classes regarding
sexual matters.”, as a Psychologist Barbara couldn’t refrain from some
speculation, “Maybe it is because since you were young your classmates
were always older and more sexually mature than you”, Lillian blushed with
shame and anger, since she skipped a couple of years in middle school she was
always behind in her development but even now as a fully developed 21 year old
woman some of her classmates called her “the nun” behind her back and John
openly called her “the ice cube” saying that she was as frigid as the north
pole. Barbara continued, “I am not criticizing you, nor judging you, as a
matter of fact there is nothing to be ashamed of, but I believe that this time
you aversion is blinding you, because you surely understand that the case study
approach is better for this thesis than the meta-study”.
“What
aversion? I don’t have any aversion...”,
“My
mistake, I shouldn’t have say that, I am sorry. But that is not what we are
discussing here, the question is: Is the meta study
a better approach or could it only perpetuate the same ideas forever?
Wouldn’t it be more interesting and more likely to break new ground if you use
the case study approach? Tell me, do you really believe a meta study has more
potential or are you simply avoiding the case study because you are still
uncomfortable discussing sex in a direct interview?”.
Lillian
felt trapped. She didn’t like to do lengthy interviews to some whore but she
didn’t like to look childish either. “You are right Ms. Barbara. I hadn’t see
the potential of the case study, the way you put it make it look a lot more
interesting than the meta study…”.
Before
Lillian could back off, Barbara continued, “Ok. See you in two weeks, I would like to see you plan to develop this project
and a calendar. Now if you allow me, I have to see another student”.
Lillian
left the office defeated. For the next few days she submerged herself in her
internship job. Well, the real job would start in a few weeks, for now she had
to attend only once a week for training and some reading assignments. It was a really good opportunity, the job offered
a good deal of experience in her area and it paid $25 per hour, not bad for an
internship job, and the best of all was that they were strong chances of making
a career there. She wanted to make a
very good impression that put her well beyond the other interns, she had hoped that her thesis would be her
presentation card in the business world, she had many times dreamed that she
would subtly let her coworkers know
about her thesis, maybe ‘forgetting’ her notes where somebody could see them or
something like that. And at some point she would openly let them know about
every successful and powerful woman that she had interviewed. In her dreams she
got admiration and jealousy from her coworkers. In the reality she made every
effort to keep her thesis topic secret.
Three weeks
later she was finishing her meeting with Ms. Barbara,” … so this was my script
for the first interview, next week I will present you a more detailed
script for each of the rest of the planned interviews…”, Ms Barbara saw
the need to interrupt her again.
“Lillian.
You know you don’t need a more detailed interview script. You already have the
general themes that you wish to talk about in each session. I had approved your
approach since last week, you will have interviews
with the selected person about her life history and backgrounds, her education,
her motivations in life, her sexual life and desires, and finally her
conscientious reasons to decide to enter the pornographic industry. You should
detail the next interview only after you completed the previous one and see
where it leads you. In my opinion the most urgent activity now is to find the
research target individual. Are you avoiding that?”
“No. Of course…. I already have some alternatives…”, but she
really didn’t have a clue.
A couple of
weeks later Ms Barbara told her, “Lillian, you are putting your cum-laude at
risk, even your graduation is in jeopardy. I
don’t see any effort to accomplish this task, and I am not willing to lose my
time counseling you for a thesis that you are not really trying to write.”
“No I am
really trying…. Really”
“Who is
your research target?”
“I had
contacted several starlets but no one wants to talk with me for several long
interviews, not even after I offer to pay them. Maybe I could change the thesis
subject due the impossibility to find a research target…”
“That is
out of the question. Are you or Aren’t you
capable to do psychological research? Right now I really don’t know. Return
next week with the transcript of the preliminary interview with the research
target and prove me that you are capable”.
The
following week came too quick and she didn’t want to go empty handed, so she
fabricated an interview with some data she extracted from the biography of a
porno actress.
Ms Barbara
read the couple of pages with the transcript and said very seriously, “Listen
Lillian this is not a game. This is a fabricated interview, this is academic
fraud and I will report it, the board is very sensitive to these issues right
now. Most probably you will be expelled, no graduation opportunities for you
after that.”
“Please Ms
Barbara give me another chance…”, Lillian never in her
life thought she could be begging for academic mercy ,she was openly crying and
telling Ms Barbara that she really had contacted a few porno stars but
everybody had rejected her approaches and she didn’t know what to do. She
begged for more time.
“OK.
Lillian I will let this gaffe slip…. for now, but if you try to fool me again I
will report you immediately and you surely will be expelled. Is that clear?”,
Lillian was
frightened and slowly nodded.
Ms. Barbara
continued, “On the other hand, I am here to help you, let me think about your
problem for a moment”. For a few minutes Ms Barbara used her computer while
Lillian managed to calm herself down. Finally Ms Barbara seemed satisfied and
talked, “Listen Lillian, your approach could be wrong, it is hard to get the
well established stars to talk to you, It could
be embarrassing and time consuming for them and they really don’t get anything
from it, you have better chances with rookies and people just trying to enter
the industry, and they would also probably be more spontaneous.”, she printed
something and handed the page to Lillian.
“These are the address and schedules for a
couple of porno auditions for young women. The applicants are maybe struggling
and I am pretty sure that with a little bit of money, you may be able to
convince one to participate in your study.
Lillian
felt relieved. She focused her efforts again. She had now a task at hand. She
went to the first audition and she pretended to be one more girl while she
observed the different girls. She found most of them intimidating, many looked
like gang members or street whores. Most of them had tattoos that Lillian found
both disgusting and intimidating. She wanted to run out of there but she
managed to control herself and stay focused. She then saw small group of girls,
they looked like sluts but were more normal, specially
a beautiful brunette with what seemed to be only natural breasts around. She
had a pleasant smile and looked more educated and classy than the rest even
when she was dressed like a big slut with a tiny red short and an even smaller yellow tube top that barely covered her natural 34C
cup tits. Lillian thought, “I rather talk with that brunette than with any
other woman in this room, and she looks savable, maybe I can use my
psychological knowledge to help her drive her life to a better
direction”. When the brunette entered the audition room, Lillian left and
waited for her outside. The other girls made scornful sounds thinking that she
had chickened.
When the
brunette left the building she looked disappointed, Lillian approached her,
“May I have a little chat with you?”
“If you
want to know how it went, well they didn’t even let me take off my clothes, the
director said that I was very pretty but didn’t have the look they were looking
for”, she sighed and said, “at least he gave me his card, and told me that a
friend of his will be auditing girls in a couple
of weeks or so and I should go and say he recommends me. If you want an advice, you have to go to every audition, it is the only way
to get a job because you never know what are
they looking for”.
Lillian
smiled nervously at being mistaken for an applicant, “No, listen I am a
psychology student doing some research, and I would like to interview you….”
“Hey I am
not a nut case! look anywhere else”
“No please
is a research about women in the pornography industry, you know models”
“ I told
you. Look for another girl.”
“I can pay
you for each interview”
The
brunette stopped. She looked interested for the first time, “How much?”
Lillian had
not thought much about it but making a quick mental calculation of her
available money and the estimated time she said “$25 per hour”.
“Per Hour?
What kind of interview is that?”
“It is for
my thesis”, Lillian then tried to keep it simple, “With
the help of your interviews I will try to portrait the psychology of
pornography models. It will take a few interviews of several hours each one.
What’s your name?”
“Karen”
Lillian
remembered a sales training that she took some time ago and pressed for the
closing, “When can we start Karen?”
“Hey, I
hadn’t accepted yet. I don’t want to be your lab rat and be exposed to all your
snotty classmates or something”, She was jobless and
completely broke at that moment and the money was pretty attractive.
“Don’t
worry your name and image will be known only by me and my counselor for the
rest you will be known only as YOUNG WOMAN #1. “
“OK. Deal”
Then she
exchanged some personal data and Lillian took a photo of Karen alone in her
slutty outfit and one with her as a proof.
Her next
meeting with Barbara was a success, she applauded her
bravery and told her that she expected that the project marched well from then
on.
Lillian agreed
with Karen to make the interviews at Karen’s apartment. She shared it with
another girl but she wasn’t there during most of the day due to her job. The
first couple of interviews where very useful for
Lillian although she felt very uncomfortable because Karen always was dressed
in scant clothing. She had managed to profile a good part of Karen’s biography
and academic life. Her mother had died when she was eleven and her father loved
her but worked in a sea oil platform and came to land only a few weeks per
year. She had been a pretty good high school student but it wasn’t enough to
get a scholarship. She studied accounting in a community college but she didn’t
graduate because she had to quit when the money got tight and she had gotten a
full time job as a waitress. She felt trapped and lonely, her father was rarely
home and most of her friends had gone to colleges outside her town. So one day
she traveled to the west coast looking for better opportunities. Things hadn’t
improved much, she had had a few temp waitress jobs and she had danced in a
strip club and had posed for a couple of nude photo shoots. The money was
good and quick, so she was looking for more jobs in that vein.
When
Lillian presented her interviews to Barbara, she was very pleased with her
advance, even when it was still only superficial, it was promising and she
already had a talkative research target.
On the
third appointment Karen received Lillian wearing nothing but an almost
transparent robe. Lillian thought that was just too much, “Listen Karen, it is important that you feel comfortable in our
interviews but that attire is frankly outrageous. I know you are a slut but
come on, you are practically naked, and the way you sit, well, you are not
hiding anything. You must understand that we are not such close friends, you must wear more conservative when we met. Don’t
you have any jeans and t-shirts, like decent people?”
Karen felt
a wave of humiliation and rage and exploded, “I can’t do this anymore. You are
what?, three years younger than me? and
you are always patronizing me, judging me. You don’t even know pornography and
you try to explain why people acts in those films. You
are a self centered bitch. The deal is over, go away”
Karen was
not entirely convinced to stop the interviews but the reality was the money was
less tight now that she had earned $200 and she thought that she had a better
leverage to bring down that uppity bitch a peg or two.
Lillian
panicked, that would return her to square one and she had a very tight schedule
to end her thesis on time after all the weeks that she lost with her
indecision. She admitted to herself that her outburst was really stupid and inopportune . She decided to control the damage so she
could restart her work. She feigned repenting trying
to tranquilize Karen.
“I am
sorry, you are right. I was really insensitive.”, but she could not avoid to
transparent her real feelings and lack of
interest, specially when she didn’t even pause for Karen’s reaction and said,
“Could we continue now? I need to talk about the beginning of your sex
life and ….”
“NO.
Listen. “, now Karen was really pissed, “This little bitch is trying to
manipulate me, let’s see who has the upper hand”, she thought.
“Lillian,
you are analyzing me like if I were a lab animal, you are not even trying to
really understand me at a really human level, you are just trying to comply
with some academic requisite but you are asking me to bare my soul while you
judge me and despise me. I really can’t take it anymore. I quit.”.
Lillian
realized that the situation was turning really serious and pondered her
options. She could bluff and accept that the deal was over and then maybe Karen
would back off because she needed the money, but that was really risky, if
Karen really backed off, she simply would fail her thesis, she just didn’t have
time to find another research subject, and catch up with the interviews, not to
mention that losing her subject would look very bad to Ms. Barbara. No she had
to cool down Karen and make some compromises in order to continue.
“I am
really sorry. I accept my mistake, I will really try to understand you this
time, and we can make the interviews in the way that you feel more
comfortable. Could you still be my subject, please?”
Karen saw
weakness and for a moment thought in saying no just to make her suffer but she
managed to remain rational, take advantage of the situation and get some money
and fun.
“OK, but it
had to be under my rules”
Lillian
didn’t like her position but she kept herself focused on her goals, “I just
have to interview this bitch three more times for 4 hours to complete the 20
hours required for the thesis. I can swallow my pride to get my goals”, she
thought, and said
“And what
are those rules?”
“First. If
you really are trying to understand this world, you have to know it. You will
come here and look at porn for two hours in your
laptop before the interviews. I will send you links and I will test you to know
that you really looked at them”
“I don’t
think that is necessary…”
“Then you
may go”, said Karen hopping that she didn’t.
“OK. Can it
be half an hour, I am really very busy and … “
“NO. I
think it is very necessary so we can talk on a common ground. But I will make a
compromise my self: I will wear jeans and a T-Shirt
for the interviews”
Lillian saw
a little victory and agreed on the two hours. “Maybe that bitch Ms Barbara
would like me to know more about porn anyway”, she thought.
“Second.
When you are at my place you will wear what I tell you. Being the less dressed
person in a place will help you get some of the feelings of the porno models
that you are trying to analyze.”
Lillian
instinctively closed the upper button of her blazer,
she was wearing a business attire as usual. That was just too much and unjustifiable
and she decided to set a limit, “No Karen, I
need to maintain my professional image, it is better for the interviews…”
“Bullshit,
your image of authority is intimidating and a barrier for a better
communication and you know it and you still don’t want to empathize with me,
you don’t even dare to dress like me. You’ll surely portray me as a degenerated
monster and I don’t want that”. Karen eyes were teary and Lillian felt bad,
maybe she was right.
“OK. I can
do that. Just to make you feel better. It is not big deal”.
Karen
smiled slightly and said, “Thanks, Lillian I really appreciate it, maybe we can restart tomorrow on better terms. And don’t worry it could even be fun”.
The next
morning Lillian arrived at Karen’s department, she was wearing a t-shirt and
jeans and no makeup. She thought “Why bother?”, She
was received by Karen that was dressed very similar. Lillian was surprised, with this more standard attire Karen looked not
different from Lillian’s classmates. This time Karen leaded Lillian to her
bedroom instead of the living room as usual.
There over the bed was the same outfit that Karen was wearing the first time
they met. Lillian blushed the symbolism was too much, but she shake out the
idea and changed into it. She had to spare the bra because the tube top won’t
cover the straps and it would look worse than nothing. She was a bit shorter
than Karen and a little bit flatter so the short and the tube top covered her a
little more, still she had never wore anything that small, she even had to take
off her granny panties because they showed over the shorts and under
them. She was wearing high heels as usual trying to disguise her short
stature, but now she regret it because using high heels with shorts
looked extremely slutty, after a little hesitation she decided to go barefoot
thinking she would look casual like just getting out of the bed. She
looked at her reflection in a full body mirror that was attached to the bedroom
door. “I look like a high school girl in a pajama party”, she thought while
biting her lower lip, “like a slutty high school girl”. She was having second
thoughts and had to summon all her courage to leave the bedroom. Karen
immediately closed it with key, leaving Lillian’s clothes locked inside.
Lillian
felt a wave of apprehension being trapped in those slutty clothes, but she
calmed herself thinking that nobody but Karen would see her and Karen knew she
wasn’t like that, that she wasn’t a slut.
“Hey, You look great”
Lillian blushed, she hated the way she looked, it
made her feel dirty and low class, but most of
all she felt insecure, deprived from her make up,
high heels and clothes she felt that she didn’t portray the image of a self
confident college girl who was near to finish her bachelor degree with honors instead
she looked like a slutty high school girl, still she didn’t want to contradict
Karen. She didn’t know what else to say so she just replied meekly “Thanks”
while looking at the floor.
“Come on,
you may work on the kitchen table. Check your email, I already sent your
‘assignment’ for today. I will back in a couple of hours for the interview.
Enjoy”
She left a
bunch of links and a long questionnaire. It looked like Karen had put a lot of
work in this. First there was a list of 20 links, each one pointed to a video
of a girl stripping, and some times touching herself.
According to the questionnaire, Lillian had to say how the girl looked in terms
of age, education and lifestyle. She then had to answer if the girl was
aroused, ashamed or both. And explain why. She had to explain which
videos were hotter and why. If the girl was masturbating, Lillian had to
describe her technique. Lillian felt very strange, it was almost surrealistic,
if anybody could see her now, they would only
see a slutty girl barefoot and barely dressed with cheap clothes looking at
internet porn in the deteriorated kitchen of a low class neighborhood apartment
in the middle of the morning. She shivered, “I guess that no one of my
classmates looks like this as they research for their thesis”, she thought.
She shacked
that thought away and concentrated in the task at hand. She really had to pay
attention to be able to answer Karen’s questions, but she managed to remain as
detached from the pornographic scenes as possible by answering with technical
words and clinical descriptions of the videos, her text was full of phrases
like, “The blond girl looked probably lower middle class with no education
beyond high school and manifested an intrinsic exhibitionism because in spite
of her normal body reactions to embarrassment like her slight blushing, she
nonetheless got sexual gratification from the exposure as noted by her obvious
arousal…. The brunet cheerleader masturbation technique consisted mainly in the
stimulation of the clitoris using a couple of fingers in a circular movement
while the red head preferred a deep vaginal penetration alternated with the
manipulation of her mammary glandes which seemed to
be very erogenous for her”.
When Karen
arrived she grabbed the questionnaire and after a brief look, she stored it in
a brief case that she had been carrying and they started with the interview.
The interview proceeded more less normally except for
a power shift with Karen taking more and more the authoritative role. It was
maybe because of the weakness that Lillian had shown or maybe because the
insecurity that her state of undress caused her, specially
when Karen was fully and decently dressed.
During the interview, Karen forbid Lillian to use technical words arguing
that she could not follow the conversation but when Lillian offered to explain
the meaning of the words Karen protested that she only was trying to make her
feel ignorant. In the end Lillian agreed to avoid those words. Karen was amused
and soon asked Lillian to stop using other words that she said were
complicated. By the end of the interview Lillian was using mostly the language
of a High school student.
After just
an hour of interview, Karen said, “Listen Lillian, I am tired, these interviews
are exhausting, I think that from now on we will keep them under one hour”,
seeing Lillian desperate face, Karen continued, “but we can have them daily if
you want, and you may stay after the interviews, maybe you can get some things
by just observing me instead of your tiresome questions”.
Lillian
thought about the implications, she had originally
planned a couple of 4 hours interviews this week and one for the next.
“I need
another 11 hours of interviews and I just have this week and the next to
complete them. It is only Tuesday. Can you help me make this on time? ”
“Don’t worry , you may come on Saturdays too and I will give you an
extra hour one day so you can complete it within time. I only have one
condition: I am telling you all about my self and I
don’t know anything about you, I would like that you stay for a while, maybe an
hour or something like that after the interviews, so we can share some time
together. It would really make me feel more comfortable because the interview
questions are getting more and more personal”.
Lillian
hated the deal. She would have to come daily for almost two weeks and comply
with Karen’s foolish rules and invest 4 hours for each hour of interview, but she didn’t want to argue with her and risk
worsening the situation, at least with this arrangement she won’t delay her
thesis.
“I would
have to make arrangements with my internship job to enter at 13:30 instead of
13:00 for a few days”.
---0—
The next
day Lillian started a new routine. She arrived to Karen’s apartment a few
minutes before nine wearing her business outfit and carrying a bag with her
makeup. She took off all of her clothes except a white bikini panty that she
bought for the occasion so her panty didn’t result bigger than her outer
clothes like the previous day. Then she dressed in the tiny purple mini
skirt and a short white thank top that left most of her abdomen visible
and was made of a very thin fabric that barely covered her. She noticed that
Karen had escalated the slut level of the outfit but didn’t say anything, “If
she wears this kind of attire in public I can be brave enough to wear it inside
the apartment”. The reality was that Karen had never worn these clothes outside
her apartment, the outfit that she wore for the audition was in fact her most
daring one, she bought it specially for the audition
thinking that a slutty look would help her get the job. When she agreed to make
the interviews with Lillian she felt a bit insecure, after all she didn’t considered
herself a porno model, yes she had made that photo session with Mark, but he
probably didn’t even sell it. As a matter of fact the audition where she found
Lillian was her first one since she broke up with Mark. She decided that she needed the money and
this research thing was a less stressful way to earn it, so in order to avoid
Lillian to decide she wasn’t a good research subject she thought that she
needed to look more like a real porno actress, so she had gone to a second hand
clothes store and had bought a few items that she considered helped her to look
the part, including her transparent robe.
She had
felt uncomfortable wearing those clothes in front of Lillian, but she imagined
with amused satisfaction that the proud and mighty Lillian must be feeling much
worse.
After
locking her bedroom with Lillian clothes inside, Karen said, “I am leaving again, I have to keep looking for a job. I left you a new
‘assignment’, you may work in the kitchen, but this time remember to avoid
using fancy words while answering the questionnaire, as a matter of fact you
have to start using the porno vocabulary so we can understand each other
better. So remember no more ‘vagina’, ‘penis’, etc. I
want you to use real life words like pussy, cunt, dick,
whatever suits you, just don’t use medical words.”
After that
she left, and Lillian started her job again, just this time it was getting
frustratingly hard to try to remain detached from the videos. First because the
videos were getting more hard core, not that she hadn’t seen things like that
before, as a matter of fact she had seen porn as part of her sexual psychology
classes, but having to comment them with crude words somehow crumbled her
defense of coldness. She started writing things like, “The blond slut is surely
a high school drop out and she blows a black man’s dick mainly
licking all over his dick and balls but he seemed to prefer the cheap whore
looking brunette’s job who swallowed his entire dick while touching her own
fake big tits”.
When Karen
returned Lillian was completely absorbed in her task and was beginning to feel
aroused. Thankfully she could hide her arousal and handed her answered
questionnaire. Karen took a brief look at it and then stored it with the other
one. Lillian managed to compose herself and interviewed Karen for an hour. She
didn’t advance all that she had planned maybe because she was a bit distracted
and maybe because in her state she didn’t want to talk much about sex for fear
that her arousal returned. After the interview they chatted for a while
and then watched tv until
the agreed time. Then Lillian was allowed to dress in her business outfit and
she expertly applied her makeup. In the end she looked maybe like a 23 or 24
business woman instead of her real age of 21 and far from the teenager slut
image that she portrayed all morning. She went to her internship job, she
was full of anticipation, it would be her first real
day in the job.
The next
day was pretty much alike but in the fourth...
Lillian had
just changed and was wearing just blue bikini panties and a yellow t-shirt that
went just a few inches bellow
her tits. She was barefoot as usual and didn’t wear makeup,
her red hair was tied in a pony tail. She still preferred the just out the bed
look because wearing makeup or shoes with these outfits would look absolutely
slutty. She looked at her image in the full body mirror, this time
however she surprised herself because her first thought was not how shameful
she felt about dressing like that, which of course was still true, still this
time she could not avoid to think, “How would I look with bigger tits”. She
felt more ashamed of this thought than of her state of dressing. She had always
despised that kind of thinking that she believed belonged to women that let
themselves to be objectified by a misogynist society that established a
standard of beauty for them.
“What am I
thinking? I am an independent woman not some eye candy for a bunch of bastards.
All this porno is getting into my mind but it only will make me more resolute
to fight against sexism”, she said to herself. Just then Karen entered the
bedroom and said, “Lillian, I want to ask you a favor, you know as a friend.
You may say yes or no, I won’t push you or anything to get it.”, Karen paused
for a few seconds but Lillian made a sign for her to continue, “You know
I have been looking for job, not only the audition, I have applied for several
waitresses jobs and for a few clerical
position. Then I found this add about a position in an accounting department,
they offer a good pay and I know I am fully qualified but I don’t know if I
look the part and I am very weak at job interviews. I don’t know if it is
because of my looks or the way I talk but they usually don’t take me seriously,
if the interviewer is a man he could even flirt with me and I confess that I
had slept with more than one of them hopping to be hired but it never happens”,
she sighed deeply and then said, “The interview is in three hours, I know I am
a good candidate, and you work for a personal department, you must know some
tricks. Can you help me?”
Lillian
thought, “I can get this girl out of the sex business and win a battle against
this sexist society, even beat those sexist bastards at the personal
departments. And Karen will be thankful and surely would make my life a lot
easier”
“OK. I’ll help
you. First let’s see you wardrobe. There must be something better for you to
wear, something that reflects confidence and capability”
They
browsed for Karen’s clothes for a while, Lillian could not find anything that
sent the right message, all of her clothes looked cheap, no-brand jeans and
shirts, inexpensive skirts and quite a few slutty clothes, short miniskirts,
tank tops, etc.
Lillian felt disappointed, with those clothes she would be in disadvantage from
the moment she entered the interviewer office. But Lillian was a very
determined person and after just a little hesitation she said.
“Why don’t
you try my business outfit?”
“Are you
sure?”
Of course
she wasn’t sure, she hate the idea of this porno
actress wearing her expensive clothes but she was determined to get a triumph
for the feminism.
“Yes, It really will improve your chances”
Karen
jumped at the chance, she quickly dressed in the
outfit. The skirt was shorter on her, slightly above mid tight but it was still
acceptable for business, the blouse was a little tighter but the blazer
concealed the fact pretty well. She
looked pretty good, serious with an air of restrained sexiness. Lillian looked at her and then said, “Ok, it is good so
far, come on here”.
Then using
her own cosmetics she started applying expertly the makeup and combing Karen’s
brunette hair in a wavy style. She looked at her art and said, “You look now
more like a successful young executive than an accounting applicant but I am
sure that it will help you to make them listen you.
Now let’s prepare the interview”
They went
to the kitchen table and Lillian pretended to be the interviewer, she had
experience doing that, in the last few weeks she had made a lot of mock
interviews in her training sessions at her internship. She used her experience
to couch Karen in how to avoid common pitfalls. “What are you doing now? Are
you working for another company at this moment?”
Karen
always feared that question, “no ma’am, I am currently
unemployed”.
“No, no,
no. Never say a thing like that, it makes you look defeated and it looks that
you don’t even control your own life. Better say something like: “I am
re-launching my career, I felt that my life was stagnated when I lived in my
hometown, so I took the chance and made this trip of self discovery. I feel a
lot more self confident now and I really know what I want for my life. I have
used this time to know my self better but I also have
been preparing with a lot of self studying of business issues.”, Lillian paused
a bit to say, ”that is true, isn’t it? You told me that you spend a lot of time
reading business magazines and internet sites” , then
she continued, “so now I am ready to launch my business career, and I am pretty
sure I can make a difference on your financial department, even if I start from
a entry level position.”, She paused a few seconds to see Karen’s reaction and
then concluded, “then you may add a few comments that make the person think
that you really know about finances”.
After a few
practices Karen was feeling more and more confident, maybe the fact that she
was neatly dressed while her interviewer was dressed with tiny cheap clothes
make her feel powerful enough to rebuff her and win the little mental matches
that a job interview is full of. She thought amused, “Maybe I should picture my
interviewer dressed like that”. Lillian on the other hand was feeling more and
more self-conscious and insecure and her questions and little traps were
getting more obvious and childish, and she finally said impatiently, “Well, it
is enough I think you are ready”.
Karen left
her home feeling like a new woman. It was maybe the dress, maybe the little
training or maybe after a few years accumulating defeats the fact that she was
able to manipulate and boss around that educated girl made her feel powerful
and capable of many things.
Lillian
felt relieved when Karen parted. On one hand she felt proud of herself because
she had really boosted Karen’s chances. “If she really gets out of this
dead-end life of hers it will be my accomplishment, and I did it in less than
two hours”, but on the other hand she felt jealous, Karen was on her way to an interview
which could get her dream job and she was well prepared and projected an image
of success while she was stuck in an old
kitchen projecting the very image of female failure, she was barely dressed and
was looking at porn in the middle of the morning.
She tried
to shake that though out of her mind. She decided to concentrate in the task at
hand, she opened Karen’s email looking for
instructions. There was the list of links and the questionnaire as usual, just
this time it was accompanied by a new and strange request, “Please answer every
question in first person as if you were the protagonist. It may sound weird but
I sometime read that this exercise will further enhance your empathy with the
models and thru them with me. I hope that this will really speed up and enhance
your research interviews”.
For a
moment Lillian considered the possibility that Karen was using psychological
techniques to manipulate her, but then discarded the idea, “She is not that
smart, and she is definitely ignorant, She must have
read that in one of those girly magazines that have recipes for everything. She
is most probably trying to impress me with her ideas, this won’t help much but
I’ ll give a try to avoid pissing her, and if she is
trying to manipulate me, she will soon know that I am not easily fooled and I
have a very strong mind and will”.
But as she
started to look at porn and write “her” doings, she was getting more and more
involved in the porn scenes, and her language was becoming raunchier by the
minute. Soon she was writing things
like, “I am sucking a man’s cock while doing a hand job to another man using my
right hand and my horniness grows and grows until I feel the need to touch
myself and I start first rubbing my clit then I fuck myself with two fingers.
After I made them cum on my face I finally cum myself.”,
She was writing with her right hand while gently rubbing her pussy over her
panties with the other. She became all flustered, then she realized, ”oh, no my panties are all wet. I need to do something or
that bitch will think that I am horny slut like her”. She went to the bathroom, took off her
panties, washed them in the lavatory and then used a hairdryer for maybe half
an hour to dry them. When she was satisfied, she smelled them, and smiled
satisfied, they smelt like soap.
She was
about to put them on when she decided to put them on the chair next to hers. “I
don’t have time for another wash. It is not that I will get aroused again, it’s
just that I don’t want to sweat them and that Karen gets the wrong message”
She
restarted her viewing and her writing, “I am naked in the center of a rom, my hands are tied behind my back and I am sucking a
black man’s cock..”, her arousal grew and grew and she
decided to take off her shirt. She was now completely naked in other’s people
apartment. After just a few minutes of writing, she felt more daring, she took
her tiny t-shirt and her panties and carried them to the living room, she put them over
the low table and returned to the kitchen. Her heart was pounding hard, if
somebody entered the apartment at that moment, the first thing they would see
would be her clothes laying on the low table. “They
would think I am the worst slut”, but somehow that humiliating thought or the
adrenalin of the fear of being discovered was making her hornier and the scenes
in her computer weren’t helping her. A wicked idea crossed her mind. It was
completely stupid but she was too horny to think straight. She activated the
webcam in her laptop then retired her chair 8 feet from the table and after a
few adjustments she started recording. She touched her tits and pussy like she
had seen the models do a thousand times in the last few days. She imagined that
the video was being seen by a lot of horny teens and older guys. She even
licked her fingers clean after inserting them in her very wet pussy, then she winked at the camera. Fortunately for her, she was
so aroused that she came very fast, otherwise who knows to what point she would
have taken her show.
After she
recovered from the best orgasm that she remembered, she felt immediately
repented and exposed, she ran to the living room and got her clothes, she went
to the bathroom and showered, taking care of not wetting her hair. She dried
herself and put her t-shirt but decided to save the panties for the last minute
because she still had 9 links to ‘analyze’.
At two o
clock the front door opened startling Lillian, who quickly put on her panties, by then she was all sweated and had came two
more times, all in all she had been seeing porn for three hours. The whole
kitchen smelled of sex and her panties showed a wet spot in spite that she had
just put them on. She closed her laptop and mumbled that she had been working
in her notes. Then she realized the hour and panicked, she should had been in her job 30 minutes ago. She started screaming “I got a go now! Please
give me my clothes”,
they both ran to the bedroom and Lillian immediately took off her
t-shirt while Karen undressed fast. Lillian picked her clothes from the floor
and put on her skirt over her stained panty and her blouse,
there was no time for the bra or the pantyhose. She put the blazer, undid her ponytail
and combed her hair using her hands while steeping over her shoes. She ran to the door and in a few minutes she
was on a taxi on her way to her workplace.
At the end
of the afternoon she was sat
in her boss office, hearing him lecture her. That day signified a
big step back in her career and her boss was letting her know it. She was not
only more than an hour
late even after the 30 minutes permit that he had accepted. She was also
reflecting a poor personal image. The quality of the business suit was simply
not enough to make her look professional, it was all wrinkled, she was sweated
and her hair was in disarray, she wasn’t wearing any makeup, and she smelled…
strange. But the main complain of her boss was the way that she conducted a
couple of applicant interviews. They videotaped every interview for legal
reasons and he had reviewed her performance because he had some doubts after
the way she was dressed.
In the
videos she was nervous and was quickly overpowered and outsmarted by the novice
job candidates. The reality was that by then she had thrown her panties in the
trashcan because they smelled a lot, but being panty-less and bra-less aroused
her a lot and soon she was sitting her bare ass on the chair for fear of
leaving a wet spot in her skirt. In that state of undress she made the first
interview and she was constantly distracted by the memories of Karen’s practice
and her shameful morning in Karen’s kitchen, so she quickly felt her self
confidence fly away while her arousal grew. She had to use her computer to remember
the script of the interview and she even stammered and blushed ashamed in the last few
questions.
Mr. Palmer
finally talked, “I had my doubts of hiring somebody so
young as you but you made a very good first impression to us. I still have
faith in you, and I believe that this was just a very bad day that doesn’t show
your real capacity. I will give you one more chance to show me that you are
indeed a valuable professional”, Lillian breathed with relief, she was expecting she would get fired. He continued, “but I can’t risk
our company reputation, the last person complained that your interview was too
childish and he even thought that you may have been flirting with him with your
body language”. Lillian could not avoid to blush, she wasn’t flirting, at least not on purpose, but
she remembered that she was wondering how his penis would look like and maybe
her body or face betrayed that thought. “I will maintain your internship but
you will be working in the file department”. Lillian was open mouthed, “One
little mistake and this creep is sending me to do secretarial work”, but she
managed to calm herself and answered, “I am sorry I disappointed you, I am not
normally like this, believe me, I had a very bad day. It is not an excuse but
it is only to say that this was exceptional, and from now on you will have in
me your best and more professional intern and I hope that once I recover your
trust you may assign me more challenging matters”. He softened a bit, “Yes of
course, just show me that and you will be on a successful career path again”,
she smiled more at ease now, but he finished, “But I have to tell you: One more
irresponsibility and you are out, we don’t have time to work with
unprofessional people. And by the way, while you are assigned to that department
you will earn $12 per hour instead of $25 and you will have to change your shift for this
position, now you will work from 9:00AM to 1:00PM ”. The new schedule just
complicated things but she didn’t dare to protest, she only said, “Yes, sir”.
She went
home depressed. “My career is going nowhere, not only I was assigned the most
stupid thesis topic but now I had been demoted in my internship job”, she
sobbed for an hour or so, savoring her sadness until she finally fought back.
“They want me to fail but I won’t. I will be the best internship worker ever
and I will make the best thesis even if it is about the worst subject”. She
went to bed more relaxed, and motivated. “I will get the most from Karen, even
her more secret motivations. She was right in something, now that I had seen
some porn, I got a lot more questions to make her and I think those questions
will lead me to more interesting insights”.
The weekend
was a blur, on Saturday afternoon she had meet with Karen at her apartment
while her roommate was shopping. She interviewed her for couple of hours to
make up for the missing Friday interview. The interview advanced slowly, maybe
because Karen wasn’t in the mood to talk about her sex life and maybe because
Lillian didn’t felt comfortable talking about sex sat scantly
dressed in the same kitchen where she had that shameful behavior last Friday.
The conversation constantly drifted out of topic and she learned that Karen had
made a very good impression in her interview, and that she was very confident
that she will receive an offer soon.
On Monday
Lillian went to her job neatly dressed as a successful young executive with a
perfect makeup and perfect hairdo with the hope to impress her boss. But the
day was very bad for her. First, the filling department was mostly isolated
from the rest of the company, so nobody important will see her there. Then she
noticed with anger that most of the girls assigned to the same job as she were
high school girls. She felt humiliated but it got worse when she was assigned
as a member of one team and she was put under the orders of a high school girl.
The team was scanning and destroying all their old paper documents. Lillian as
the newest member of the team was assigned the worst part of the job. Behind
the filling department was a big warehouse full of boxes with old documents.
The warehouse was dirty and lacked any air conditioning. Lilllian’s
job was to bring a box from the warehouse and then take an already processed
box full of just scanned documents and carry it to the warehouse where she must
use the document shredder to completely destroy the documents and then pick
another box to take it to the filling office.
Her clothes
were completely inadequate for the job, soon she was sweating and her feet were
in pain. She hid behind some boxes and took off her pantyhose, her blazer and
quickly arranged her hair in a ponytail. When she returned from the office the
next time she left her shoes beside the door, and then worked most of the time
barefoot only putting her shoes to enter the office. At noon everybody went to
lunch and she had to wait for them to give her another bunch of documents to
destroy. Lillian returned to the warehouse and sat by the paper shredder she
was bored and depressed and then a wicked idea crossed her mind. An hour later
she was finally going home. She wasn’t wearing any underwear, because the
panties and bra that she had worn to work were now shredded into little pieces
that laid bellow layers of destroyed documents.
When she
was leaving her new boss, Jean, said to her, “Listen Lilly, you did a great
work today, but you are a little bit overdressed, you know it is your job which
will cause a good impression, not your dress”, Lillian had to swallow her
pride, she hated being called Lily and she hated being patronized. Jean
continued, “as you see we all come here in jeans and
comfortable clothes. It is acceptable because we work in the background out of
the sight of the customers and the bosses. You will be working the warehouse
for the week, I know it is tiresome but it is the rule here for the new kids”,
Jen noted Lillian despair and
tranquilized her, “Don’t worry it will
pass flying, and I recommend you to wear shorts and a tank top or something
like that to cope with the heat. Don’t worry, you are allowed to break the
dress code while you are working at the warehouse, after all it is technically
outside the office”.
She went to
her home, took a long shower and dressed informally. She wanted to put the
memories of her morning behind her. She tried
to contact Karen but she didn’t answer at home nor in
her cell phone. She finally decided to check her computer and found an email
from Karen.
“Lillian
We can’t met today at 2:30PM because I already had an appointment for
today and I wasn’t able to change it in so short notice to adapt to your new
job schedule. My roommate would be home
early, so we better met at your place. I will be arriving at 6:30PM.
I think we
are really making a progress in the interviews, you
are making a great job that surely will impress your teachers and classmates.
However in spite of your effort to empathize, You
surely had noticed that there is still a barrier in our communication, I am
talking about the sexual aspects of the interview. For today’s meeting, I promise to make my
best effort to open up with you and tell you anything you need to know, but you
need to loosen up and do the right questions.
I think a symbolic act of waxing all of your pubic hair as most of us porno models do,
will tear down the last barriers between us by showing me that you are really
committed and by making you feel that it is not really a big deal. I will understand if you are not brave enough
to do it, but I will think that you are not committed to really communicate
with me at that level and I will quit so you don’t lose any more time with me
and go to find another person with whom you can really communicate.”
“Grrr”, Lillian thought, she hated being manipulated. “She
is surely just looking for an excuse to break our deal. She probably thinks
that she will be working soon and she won’t need the money anymore. She surely
thinks I will chicken out, but she really doesn’t know me”.
She went to
the nearby mall and found the beauty parlor. She felt a little bit nervous to
ask such a treatment, specially
now that she knew that most porno actress did it, but she reunited her courage
and said.
“How much for a full bikini area wax depilation?”
“It would
be $50.00”
Lillian
expected it to be less expensive, but she was determined to do it. “Ok, let me
pay you”
The clerk
opened a book and said, “Ok, we can schedule on Thursday afternoon, which hour would be
better for you?”
“Thursday, No. I needed today”, then she realized she looked too anxious and said, “I
have a pool party and I need to look good in my new bikini”, she blushed, she
never had cared by that kind of things, she didn’t
even had a bikini.
Lillian
never had been at a pool party, and she wasn’t a party girl, the clerk on the other hand, looked
precisely like that kind of girl and she looked at Karen with sympathy. “Sorry,
we really are full today, I wish I could…”, then she paused for a moment and
said, “Wait a minute, let me check something”, she then entered the back room
and after a few minutes she returned and said smilingly to Lillian, “Maybe
there is a way to solve your problem, come inside and Sandra, my boss, will
propose you a solution. This way… it ‘s the first door”
“Hi, I am
Sandra Mayers. As my assistant told you all of our
beauticians are already fully scheduled We have however a new treatment and we
have slots available for today. It is called laser depilation and it is very
effective and permanent so the cost is considerably larger, we can do that area
for just $250 or the full body for $700”.
Lillian
felt disappointed, that wasn’t really an option, she
simply could not expend that kind of money.
She made a motion to stand up, “Thanks for the offer, but I really can’t
expend that money”.
“Please sit
down. I suspected that and the reason I am talking with you personally instead
of my assistant telling you about the alternative is that I have a proposal for
you”
“Here it
comes”, Lillian thought, “we have payment plans and bla
bla bla”. But then she
heard something and her attention returned.
“Excuse me.
What did you say?”
“I said
that we have been looking for a model to record a treatment in video. You know
people hears laser and thinks star-wars guns and pain, and the treatment is
pretty safe and hurts a lot less than waxing. We plan to make some publicity in
our site and have a video there of the full treatment, so people could see that
there is nothing to fear”
Lillian
blushed puzzled and was about to stand up again when Sandra continued, “We are willing to make
you a full treatment for free and today, and in exchange you will agree that we
film you and publish the video. The camera will be handled by another woman and
your face won’t be visible in the video and you will be completely anonymous.
Think about it, you get not only to look great for your pool party today but
also forget forever to shave your armpits, legs and of course your bikini
area.”
Lillian
thought, “The shaving thing is attractive, on the other hand I didn’t planned
to get rid of my pussy hair permanently. I don’t have too much alternatives, it
is this or failing and to have to beg for Karen’s mercy. I bet she would think
that I am not brave enough to do this, but I am, I am capable of many
sacrifices to get my goals”.
“OK. I’ll
do it”.
They made
her sign several forms about the treatment and it’s
permanent condition. Then she had to sign a release form for the video, in
which it stated clearly that her face, her voice, and any clearly identifiable feature of her
body would be hidden or blurred and her identity will be protected at all times
by the company, otherwise they would suffer a big penalty. Lillian considered
the contract fair and that it reflected what she been told, still her hand
trembled a bit when she signed.
“Just one
man had seen me naked in my life and now who knows how many people will see this
video”, she shivered but then relaxed a bit thinking,
“but nobody will know it is me”.
A couple of
hours later she was on her way home. The whole treatment had been surrealistic, she had been completely naked the whole time.
She first rested on her belly while Sandra worked on her legs, then on her butt
and lower back. She was then turned around and Sandra worked her armpits and finally Lillian had to
put her legs on the stirrups and her legs become open wide and Sandra started
working on her pussy hair. Lillian blushed, she felt wantonly exposed and the
worst part was that she knew that not only Sandra and the camera woman will see
her like this. The process took around three hours,
Sandra had frequent stops to turn to the camera an comment one thing or another
and indicating the camera woman to zoom in an area from time to time. The
camera was Professional and
HD and Lillian’s body was illuminated with potent photography
lamps. She was sweating which was both a torment and a
relief because when Sandra constantly dried her sweat she also cleaned her
soaking pussy.
She
returned home physically and emotionally exhausted, she took a quick shower and
was getting out of the shower when the bell rang. It was 6:30PM exactly. She
pulled a big white
towel robe that had long sleeves and went bellow her knees. She tied the belt very
well and went to open and found Karen dressed in a white shirt and blue jeans.
She was carrying her purse and a small sports bag. They went to the living room and Lillian saw
with some apprehension the sport bag, expecting that anytime soon Karen would
pull out her outfit for the interview. Karen instead opened her purse and
pulled out a small bunch of tightly packed fabric. “Here, put this on”.
Lillian
blushed, she
recognized the garment, it was the semitransparent robe that
Karen was wearing when all this mess begun. She was going to march to her
bedroom to change but Karen stopped her. “You may change here,
after all I have to see if you complied with the waxing”. Lillian blushed once
again and took off her comfy, conservative robe and after a little pause in
which Karen checked out her pussy and affirmed, “Very good! It is definitely a waxing, shaving would had
left stubs, porno producers prefer waxing because it looks smoother ”, Karen
saw Lillian worried face and added, “don’t worry it will grow back in a few
weeks, see it’s no big deal it is not like you will have the porno model look
forever ”. Lillian blushed even more, she hadn’t thought
it that way, and now she indeed will have that look forever. She shivered
ashamed and full with regrets and then put on the shear robe, it was worse than
she remembered, the
fabric wasn’t solid it was more like a very tight net, but what surprised
Lillian the most was the length. When Karen had worn it, it came to just above
her knees, while now it barely covered Lillian’s buttocks. She looked at Karen
puzzled, and Karen said. “Oops, looks like I miscalculated your height. I cut a
bit of the robe so it will fit in my purse and I thought it would be a little
longer than mid tight for you.”
“Ok. Give
me the belt”
“Sorry but
the belt didn’t fit in the purse”
Lillian
pulled the robe closed with her hands and then said, “Ok, let’s proceed with
the interview”, but she couldn’t concentrate too much, she was just too nervous
and thought, “Here I am, dressed worse than when I called her a slut, and the
worst is that my bald pussy is on display and I don’t even count on my pussy
hair to hide my arousal.”, she was blushing, specially
when she thought, “mi permanently bald pussy”,
she was so distracted and her questions were so clumsy that Karen
finally said, “Lillian, you are too edgy, why we don’t we chat a little so you
can relax? Tell me about your work day, how did you feel
in your new schedule, did you do something interesting.”
“The
schedule was right and the day was … mostly boring”, The last thing that
Lillian wanted was to talk about her humiliating work day, she really didn’t
want to talk about herself, her recent actions and thoughts were something so
shameful that she
wouldn’t reveal to anyone, not in a million years, so she quickly changed the
conversation to focus on Karen. “And what about you Karen, how was your day?”
“I am glad you
asked. My day was excellent, I received the job offer that I have been looking
for and I will
begin my training tomorrow! Isn’t it wonderful?”
“Yes, of
course, it was something to be expected you did great at the interview, didn’t
you?…. Congratulations”, answered Lillian, somehow Karen’s success only
contributed to her own insecurity in spite of the fact that she had been trying
to convince herself that any achievement of Karen would be only the result of
her own superb help.
“I already
have a position as accounting assistant for accounts payable, at $29 per hour the pay
is better than any waitress job but the chief of the personnel department told
me that they were impressed with my interview and exams, and if I do really
well in the two week training, he will
recommend me for the position as an accounting analyst which is really well
paid, I think at least $40. And I am sure I will impress them, I have the
knowledge, did I tell you that my hobby is to play
with business simulations? Thanks to you
I also have the self confidence, I am just missing the image…Maybe you can help
me”
Lillian
said, “Do you want me to go shopping with you?”
“No,
Lillian, I can’t afford that at this moment, maybe with my first paycheck. For
now I need you to lend me some clothes. Maybe I may rent them, let’s say that I
won’t charge you for the interviews the days that you lend me an outfit. And I
will pay for the laundry or the dry clean of any item I use. It is just for a
few days. What do you think?”
Lillian
tried to say no, she really tried, she hated to lend her clothes, and to lend
them to a porno actress was even worse. She felt that even after laundry she
would feel the clothes were filthy, but she was having problems sustaining her
arguments against Karen, maybe it was her growing insecurity, or the fact that
she was indeed falling in some money problems making the payments to Karen
while her salary had dropped to the half and she counted on her salary for the
next rent and she really didn’t know how much time she will be earning just $12
per hour. She was still trying to resist when Karen trying to break the awkward
moment casually said, “Hey, you waxed all your body, don’t you? I remember that
you had some stub in your armpits. I have never tried waxing my armpits, it must have been very painful. I have heard that
there is a new treatment with laser, they say it is not as painful and that it
is permanent. When the cost comes down I will give it a try with my armpits and
legs, of course I wouldn’t do it with my pubic hair. Who would want to be stuck
with the porno actress look forever?”
Lillian
blushed once again, this conversation was very uncomfortable for her and it was
quickly becoming personal as Karen continued, “What do you think Lillian?”
Lillian was
startled and didn’t want to answer, if they stuck to that subject sooner or later the truth would surge
and she could not bear the shame. So after a pause of a few seconds she tried
to change the subject, “Sorry, I was distracted thinking about your other
question. OK, I will lend you some clothes, but I rather like that you pick
them here each day in the morning”, this last condition was an improvisation,
she wanted to make it hard for Karen so maybe she would end using her own
clothes instead of traveling across the town early in the morning just to use
one of Lillian’s business outfits.
“OK, Thank you Lillian”, Karen even embraced Lillian sincerely
and gave her a peek in the cheek. All of which felt strangely odd to Lillian
given her state of undress and maybe influenced by all the lesbian porn that
she had been looking at. She felt oddly aroused feeling Karen’s warm hands
traveling her almost naked back, so she once again broke the silence with a
change of subject. “So Karen, following with the interview, at what age did you
started your sex life?”
That broke
the embrace and Karen started talking, “It was when I was 18 years old. I had a
boyfriend then, he
was 19. We had been dating for four months and on a Saturday he took me to a
cabin that her parents had just outside town and we make love two times that
day. It was a little bit painful but he was tender and patient with me. He had
only made love once before but he was very good at it, the first time I didn’t
came but the second one was quite a discovery for me, It was maybe the mix of
love and lust but it was something well beyond any masturbation. Unfortunately
he moved to a college 400 miles away and our young love didn’t resist the
distance, so instead of cheating each other we broke up a few months later and we
remained in good terms.”
Karen
sighed at the memories.
Lillian was
startled, that beginning didn’t match her stereotype at all.
“And what about you Lillian?”
“Err… me…
well I started my sex life at… 17”, She remembered it very well it was her
first and only time with a man, she was at her late 16’s in her high school
senior year, with all of her classmates at least two years older than her she
was frequently teased and treated as a child, so when Norman said that he could
see the real woman in her, she fell in his clumsy seduction. She expected to be
taken in a date to a restaurant or the movies, instead he took her to a motel
that rented by the hour. When she started to freak out he said, “Are you a
child or a woman? I know you are a woman but if you still think yourself as a
child, then we can go back home right now”. She didn’t want to go back home
defeated and didn’t want to look childish in front of Norman, so she accepted.
She was then clumsily fucked while she was naked and Norman fully clothed. It
was more painful than anything else, and they quickly left the hotel room. They
didn’t even use the full hour. Of course it was all too shameful to be said so
she simply added, “It was a friend from a school and he was clumsy but had good
intentions, we never were a couple, just friends you know”, she felt awkward
and her talk reflected her nervousness so she once again diverted the
conversation to another path.
“And what
about… you know… what about women… had you been with another woman…. You know…
sexually?”
Karen
smiled, “No,
not really but my roommate surely had tried. And you?”,
she said with a laugh.
“No… of
course no”, said Lillian but she could not avoid to remember a night when she
was 18. In those days she had a roommate and once they slept in the same bed
because there was a leak in the pipes and one of the beds was soaked. She
remembered that she pretended to be asleep while her roomie
passed her hands all over her body, she remembered even kissing her back and
then dreamily mumbled “Norman”, to save face, that woman really made her come,
twice in that night. After that she was however so ashamed that she made the
arrangements to move to an apartment of her own.
After that
they talked for a while and Lillian learnt that Karen had had another couple of
boyfriends and she had only had sex with those three men in her life. Then
Karen leaved, “I think we made a real progress today, I already emailed you
your ‘homework’ for today. I will be here tomorrow at 8:00AM to choose and
outfit and change, my job is near you apartment so it won’t affect my
schedule. Lillian realized that her
tactic wouldn’t have the effect that she expected.
Once alone
, while she started browsing the porn,
she realized that Karen didn’t fit the stereotype that she had anticipated,
after a little thought she admitted that even herself filled the stereotype
better, which oddly made her pussy drip.
Her two
hours of porn passed very quickly, and writing all the events in first person
as she was the main character aroused her a lot, specially the scenes that
portrayed girls naked in public and she found also the scenes of bondage very
hot, she didn’t like pain but the humiliation aroused her. Lillian closed her
browser and tried to open her thesis project, she didn’t have much to show Ms.
Barbara in the next meeting, the few hours of the recent interviews had very
little facts. She normally recorded every interview and then made a transcript.
The transcripts were a disgrace, they showed
very little text, as so much time of the interviews was filled with
silences and unrelated talk, there were also a lot of repeated questions which
make her look very disorganized, not to mention that a very low level of language was used and not
even a single psychological term. She knew she needed to do some serious work
to rewrite the transcripts and then comment them with her professional
knowledge. But she was tired today, so she simply started typing the transcript
of today’s interview. After just five minutes she opened a browser window and
started to surf porn alternating the two activities. After one hour, she had
only typed 15 minutes of the interview, in the end she just typed half of the
interview and masturbated three times before sleep, her dreams filled with porn
scenes mixed with her own humiliating day.
The next
day she awoke to a bang on the door. She was still very sleepy and smelled of
sex and sweat. Still half awake she opened the door to find Karen. “Hi sleepy
head, it is already 8:15AM, you should hurry to get to your job on time”, That awakened Lillian a bit but the realty was the she
didn’t have slightest wish to work in that boring warehouse. Still she started
to move slowly to the bathroom and heart Karen said, “I am glad you liked the
robe”. She blushed , she didn’t even had bothered to
change. “Am I turning into a slut?”, she though but immediately put that thought away, “No, of
course, I simply was tired after yesterday nightmare of a day”.
When she
got out of the bathroom covering her body with a long towel, she saw that Karen
was already dressed in one of her favorites business
suites and was finishing applying her makeup, or better said, Lillian’s makeup.
Lillian noticed but she didn’t have the time to argue that it wasn’t part of
the deal. Karen said, “I hope you haven’t planned to use this one today.
Tomorrow you better choose first”.
“Yes of course”, Lillian put on a business
outfit too, but without make up and waited for Karen to leave. Then she quickly
took off her clothes except for the underwear and looked for something to wear
that help her manage the heat of the warehouse, after
all Jen said that the dress code wouldn’t apply to her. She browsed her clothes
but she didn’t have too much summer clothes, most of her shorts were pajamas.
The only thing she found was her volleyball uniform. She had been in the high
school team, in spite of her short height she was very agile, energetic and had
good technique she was a great defender, of course in the university she was
immediately discarded because of her height. She put her uniform and tennis shoes, it still fit her well, even when it was a bit tight.
She pulled some pants and put them over her shorts for the commute.
She arrived just a couple of minutes late but Jean made no big
deal about it. She went immediately to the warehouse and after carrying the
first box, she decided to take her pants off and work the rest of the shift
only clad in her volley ball uniform. The short was made of an elastic fabric
and fit her like a glove, it even showed her panty lines. After a
few boxes she started to sweat and decided to take off her tennis shoes and her
socks to try to cope with the heat. The day was boring and tiresome until a few
minutes pass noon, she came to the office and saw that the girls weren’t there,
“Of course, it is their lunch time, I will get one box
to the shredder so they know I am busy and don’t interrupt me”. She carried the
box to the shredder but she was so tired and so bored that almost without
thinking she started taking off her blouse, she bitted her lower lip and looked
all around to check that she was indeed alone and then unclasped the bra and
pulled out of her body. She contemplated the white garment for a while then
glancing again all around she thrown it on the industrial shredder. After a few
seconds and some worrying sounds the bra was turned into a bunch of little
cloth pieces. Lillian shivered with arousal but she quickly put on her blouse,
she wanted to keep things under control. Still her nipples poked very obviously
thru the thin fabric. She started working lazily on the documents and then
after around one third of the box had been destroyed, she felt kinky again, this time was less hesitation and less glancing around. She
took off her shorts and panties in one quick motion and then threw her white
bikini panties in the shredder that barely made a sound while completely
destroying the garment. She quickly put another bunch of documents in the
machine to cover the pieces of fabric clearly visible on the top of the
container. She was putting
her shorts when she heard a voice yelling at her. “What are you
doing?”
Lillian was
paralyzed, “I… I am….”
“We have
been looking for that box, that box wasn’t scanned yet you moron
!”
Lillian
tranquilized for a second, maybe she didn’t see me.
“It didn’t have
the red flag, remember that I told we mark every box ready for destroying with
a red flag”
Lillian
panicked again realizing that she had made a serious mistake. “I thought it had
fallen, there was a flag just outside the box”
“You let
that flag there. I told you to put them over the table when you return them but
you simply let the last one fell on the floor”.
“I am
sorry”
“Just wait
here and don’t touch any more papers. OK?”
“Yes Jen”
Jen took
the box with the remaining documents and returned half an hour later.
“The Boss
want to see us”, she said.
Suddenly
the entire world seemed to fall over Lillian’s head. She couldn’t see her boss
now, not after that stupid mistake, and not dressed like this. Nothing good could come out of that. She
started to babble.
“I can’t go
inside the office dressed like this… it breaks the dress code… and I … “
“I know it
breaks the dress-code but you may tell that I authorized you to use shorts at
work given that you would work in the warehouse. However, to be frank, I didn’t
expect that you wear a short so tiny or so tight, and the decision to wear that
tight sport blouse without a bra was entirely yours”
“Please”,
Lillian begged.
“Come on
the more we delay this, the worse for both of us. The boss hates to wait. So
come on, lets go”
Lillian was
pale, she started walking toward the west part of the
warehouse.
“Where are
you going? The office is this way.”
“I know, I
only want to put on my tennis shoes and my pants, I let them near that bunch of
boxes”
“There is
no time for that. I won’t be scolded for being late in top of the punishment I
would have to take for your stupid mistake. And who authorized you to take off
your shoes. This is not an amusement park as you may think little lady”, she
said the last phrase with scorn and Lillian blushed realizing that she had been
caught. Jen who was at least 8” taller than Lillian quickly grabbed her by the
wrist and pulled her like a little girl towards the office door. Lillian was to shocked to resist, and soon it was too late because when
they entered the office any attempt to stop now would necessarily cause a scene
that only would draw more attention to herself.
She walked
without taking her sight from the floor. She was hearing whispers, gasps and
even muffled laughs all the way. They presented a bizarre image, at least by
office standards. The young brunette high school intern was carrying her
shorter and probably younger companion like if she was a little girl. The
younger girl was barefoot and her sporty clothes looked more apt for a pajama
party than to play sports and much less to be in the office.
“This is got to be a nightmare, this couldn’t be
happening to me”, she thought ashamed. She was leaving faint prints with her
soiled soles all over the gray carpet as a probe that the scene was not part of
the imagination of the employees. Lillian realized that she never had been so
badly dressed in public. She wasn’t wearing underwear and her tight clothes did
nothing to conceal the fact, her shorts showed a clear camel toe and her
nipples were poking thru the shear fabric of her top. All the humiliation hadn’t stopped her
horniness or maybe it even contributed to it. She had many times mocked or
scolded women dressed much more decently than she was now. “What would everybody will think of me now? Sure that I am a
little bimbo”. She regretted her clothing choices and was on the verge of
crying when they finally arrived to Mr. Palmer office. She paled,
he was the very same person that had sent her to the file department as a
punishment. “I am dead”, she thought. The surprised face of Mr. Palmer when she
saw the little red hair girl wearing a pony tail, no make up
at all and just barely dressed was fast replaced by a gesture of
disapproval. He motioned the pair of
girls to sit, then he directed his talk to Jean.
“So tell me
Jean. What did happen there?”
Jean
cleared her throat and controlled her fear and nervousness. Then she repeated
what she had been mentally rehearsing.
“Mr.
Palmer, as you already know we made a serious mistake, the box labeled A-345-01
was partially destroyed before we scanned it, right now we have stopped the
operation and my team is identifying the missing documents. When we have the
complete list we will try to see how many we can recover from other sources”
Mr. Palmer
said, “Your plan of action is good, but we can’t afford these kind of mistakes. Didn’t you tell me that your system was
fool proof? Tell me what happened”.
Jean
stammered a bit but then recovered her composure while Lillian was blushing
bright red. “Well as you know we mark
boxes ready for destruction with a red flag, but during our lunch hour Lilly
took one box because she saw a red flag near it”
“Jean, just
tell me that was what you tough her?”
“No sir.
She knew that the red flag must be stick to the box and that the box must be handed to her by one
of the scanning girls. I am sure she was
capacitated properly,
I have here her written exam on the procedure, she was trying to be helpful but she forgot
the procedure”.
“One more thing Jean. Do you approve her attire?”
Jean was
silent for a couple of seconds and then said, “I authorized her to work using
shorts and fresh clothes because the warehouse is very hot as you know, but to
be frank I didn’t expect her to dress so … well…. You know”.
“That’s ok
Jean. I think you handled yourself very good giving the circumstances, but you
surely understand that we can’t afford more loses, so we will apply the penalty
for this cases as stated in your contract. Your whole team will be charged with
one day of salary. But Jean…. You impressed me, I am
pretty sure you will be a very good executive once you finish college. Now you
may go, I need to talk with Ms. Lillian for a moment”
When Jean
left the office, Mr. Palmer exploded. “What are you thinking? Are you deliberately
trying to make look bad or what?”
Mr. Palmer
was in a tall white man in his late forties.
He was normally very controlled but now he was red with anger.
Lillian
felt afraid, she was pale and started to stammer some
excuses when he interrupted her.
“Lillian,
when I sent you to the filling department, I expected that you being the most
educated and experienced would rapidly take charge and will give the operation
more certainty, maybe reviewing the procedures to make them even more secure.
Instead of that you accommodated yourself as the lowest employee of the group
and not only that but you showed less maturity than them and made a costly
mistake”
Lillian was
on the verge of crying, “How could I have been so stupid? It wasn’t a
punishment job, it was a new challenge, He still trusted me when he sent me
there to improve the department, and I failed miserably, I didn’t even fight
them when they put me in the lowest position”. She was so ashamed that she just
said, “I am sorry”, in a barely audible voice and looking at the floor.
Mr. Palmer,
didn’t want a conversation, he just wanted to release his anger. “You know Lillian business is war, war
against competitors and war against inside rivals. That is the name of the
game. I have been competing with Bob Carling from the west office for a new
position as a branch director. You just
have sabotaged one of my pet projects. I was the one that made the bet to hire
young women to do that job, they are not only cheaper than other alternatives
but they are careful and pay attention to the details. Bob mocked me, but I
knew that if I took the risk and got the results he had to eat his words at the
next meeting. Now I won’t be able to report a 100% error free operation that I
promised, all because your mistake”.
Normally
Mr. Palmer wouldn’t talk about his personal affectations by his employees, but
he was seriously distressed that day. He was in the course of a very nasty
divorce and just that morning his soon to be ex-wife had won a very important
legal battle. He continued reveling his thoughts, “You know Lilly, we are in the business of predicting people’s success at
certain job or career. That is what we do, all the interviews, all the tests
are just for that. It is very bad that I have failed to predict your failure,
and this is going to cost me, just yesterday Bob was bragging about one of his
interns that comes from your university, maybe you
know him, John Wallace. Bob said that he is doing a thesis researching factors
to predict women success in business careers. He had already interviewed Carly Fiorina, Heidi Miller and many local
business woman. See, that is the kind of thing that I would like to brag about
my interns in the regional meetings. And what would I tell them now? That my
supposedly star intern was not only a failure as an interviewer but she was a
clumsy filler, not to mention the way she is dressed”.
Mr. Palmer
took a moment to catch his breath. He felt more relaxed now that he had ranted
all that he wanted. “You are fired Lillian”.
Lillian was
pale, the whole conversation, the firing, the fact of being a disappointment,
and the way she was dressed while she listened to all that, were things that
never in her life crossed her mind as a possibility. She had often imagined
herself conversing with executives but in her dreams she had always impressed
them and either was receiving important assignments or receiving praise for her
work. She was paralyzed but then regained some control, she knew she must do
something, if she was fired, she won’t complete the required professional
practice hours and won’t graduate on time, and would have to hear a lot of crap
from Ms. Barbara. Then she thought, “unless the school
is not informed”.
“Mr.
Palmer. I would… would like to ask you… ask you a
favor…. Could you delay for a while to inform this to the university, you know
so I have chance to get another internship?”
She half
expected for Mr. Palmer to yell at her or something, but he kept quiet, which
encouraged Lillian to continue, “please Mr. Palmer, I am very sorry for
everything and I understand that you fire me but please don’t inform my
college, I’ll do anything”, she said the last phrase without giving it too much
thinking.
Mr. Palmer
pondered the situation for a second, on one hand he was really pissed at
Lillian, after all, at least in his view, she had
damaged his reputation in two ways: She
had destroyed the possibility for he to brag that he got a great intern after
taking the risk of selecting the youngest candidate. He couldn’t talk about his
vision and ability to pick the candidates more likely to succeed. But his
candidate turned to be a shame and not only that but she also hit his pet
project. On the other hand, however, he understood that firing her after just
two weeks will look bad on his image too. But he really wanted to punish this
girl. Maybe he was projecting toward Lillian his rage against his soon to be
ex-wife but anyway she deserved it.
“I can’t do
that Lillian, the moment I put you out of the payroll an automatic message
would be sent to your college…”, Lillian paled but he continued talking,
“however I could maybe retain you on another position”, Lillian saw a glimpse
of hope, “What position sir?”, she asked timidly.
“Lillian,
it is a fact that I can’t have you near our job candidates or customers because
it would severely damage the image of our company, just look at yourself”,
Lillian blushed and she was so nervous that she couldn’t even defend herself,
”you may not be anywhere near our important documents because they would be at risk,
so the only solution I see is to send you to do janitorial work, we have the
warehouse #2 already empty and we need to clean it because next month we will
receive the documents from the west office. Of course we will adjust your
salary accordingly”, Lillian was stunned, a week ago she was a rising star and
now her boss said that she could not be trusted more than janitorial jobs. She
had to fight back, she had to ask for a more
dignifying way out.
She was
trying to organize her reply when he continued. “Of course I said I could
retain you, not that I would, unless your promise to do anything is real”.
“What….?”, it was all that she managed to say, her lower lip was
visible trembling by then. She had to make up her mind quickly, “I may find
another internship and I just have to inform the university about the change
and that’s it. No big deal.”, but she wasn’t as sure as she tried to convince
herself and finally her doubts started to surge in her mind, “But it could take
days or even weeks and what if the internships are already closed?, I simply
can’t risk that, I have to stay focused to graduate on time, I am still able to
graduate with honors and he will see who am I.
But I need to buy time.”
He
interrupted her thoughts, “So, Do you want this chance or not?”
“Yes sir”,
she said in an almost inaudible voice.
“Ok. I am
willing to concede your wish but you have to earn it. Take off your blouse”.
She was
stunned; she couldn’t be asking that, “but sir… People will know… and this is
sexual harassment”.
“Let’s stop
the bullshit. You are already fired and may walk out right now, you may accuse
me of sexual harassment if you want but I don’t think you will get much
sympathy after I show the prosecutor the videos of you walking the aisles in
your skimpy outfit and you know your contract termination is perfectly
justified after your costly and documented mistakes.”, Lillian swallowed, she
knew he was right, her credibility would be extremely low. She remained quiet while he continued, “and
regarding what people think, let me tell you two things: First, if I don’t fire
you everybody would think bad about us anyway and second as long as real
evidence does not exist, rumors of
mixing power and promiscuity seems to be good for a man’s image in the
executive world. At least Bob had benefited from his womanizer fame. Everybody admire him and envy him. So would
you give me your blouse or should I call the guard to escort you out of our
facilities?”.
She was
trapped and she needed time, she wasn’t ready to fail yet, she rationalized, “I can make
sacrifices to get my goals. I can’t give this pervert a peek show, it is not
like I am a slut or something, I just want to keep this job for a few days
until I am on my feet again”, the reality was that part of her, a small part of
her she wished to think, wanted to do it.
The whole scene reminded her the scenes of
countless videos of submissive girls that she had seen in the last few
days. She started to slowly peel off her
blouse and blushing deeply she handed it to Mr. Palmer.
Mr. Palmer
took the blouse and stored it in the top drawer of his desk. Lillian felt a
knot in her stomach and a tingle in her pussy. Mr. Palmer was high on his
power, after all this time on the receiving end because of his humiliating
divorce and the way that everybody looked at him with condescending sights, he
was finally feeling with satisfaction his old power return. “It seems like you
forgot your bra. Looks like you are not smart enough to pay attention to such
details. Are you? Well, it’s no problem, it speeds up things. Now give me your
short”.
This time
it was almost too much. She was being treated like some bimbo and now he was
asking for the last piece of clothing that she was wearing. She tried to resist
to regain some control of the situation but she was
getting hornier by the minute and that was clouding her mind. Her heart was
beating fast and she really wanted to submit, to act like the sluts in the
countless videos that she had narrated and described in first person, she was
biting her lower lip with shyness and anticipation, she really wanted to do it
but she wasn’t ready to admit it to herself, she was thinking, “I need to
comply with his orders, after all he is blackmailing me and if I don’t obey it
can seriously harm my career. It is not that I am slut or something, it’s just
that I need to comply in order to gain time”.
She pulled
her shorts down and handed them to Mr. Palmer. Her hand was trembling slightly
and her respiration had become short and fast. A thousand emotions overwhelmed her,
she felt fear, shame and arousal, and in someway she
felt more alive than ever.
Mr. Palmer
smiled with satisfaction. He silently folded twice the little garment and put
it over some stack of papers at the right corner of his desk. “You are a very dirty girl Lilly. Don’t you
ever wear underwear?”
“I… I
always… I usually do… sir”, she felt very self conscious having that
conversation without a stitch of cloth covering her body.
“Well. I
see that you are really willing to do anything to get this position, but I am a
professional man, I need to know if you are really qualified. Do you have
experience as a cleaning girl?”
Lillian
blushed. “What is he talking about? I already took off my clothes wasn’t it
what he wanted?”, she thought.
The long silence
was interrupted by Mr. Palmer. “Listen Lilly, if you don’t want to be
interviewed for the position, then you may leave. Maybe you can’t manage an
interview not even from the job candidate side”
“OK. Sir”,
she said resigned, “I really don’t have… you know…”,
she felt very nervous, being naked made her very insecure, “ I never worked as
a cleaning girl sir, but … but I am sure I can do the job… I clean my house and
…”.
He started
filling a form, “Ok, no professional experience”, he said out loud while
writing in the form. “Most other candidates have professional experience, why
should I choose you over them?”
She had
prepared herself a thousand times to answer such typical job interview
questions, but she never expected to answer them naked and in regard a cleaning
girl position. She didn’t know what kind of game was Mr. Palmer playing but she
knew she had to convince him somehow. “Maybe if I do a good interview under
this circumstances I’ll
gain his respect again”,
she thought.
Lillian
breathed deeply and tried to abstract herself from her situation and return to
her well-practiced interview script. “Well, I know other candidates could have
more job experience than me but, I can bring a lot to compensate for that…”, it
was her old script but now it didn’t sound as good because her voice was
slightly trembling, she continued,” I am a team player… and I am a smart
person… I… I can learn fast and… I am very responsible… and have initiative…. I
am a very successful person… and”.
Mr. Palmer
interrupted her. The whole scene was surrealistic and he was enjoying the
situation a lot.
“Let’s go
for parts, you said you are very successful but I understand that in your last
job you were first demoted and then fired, Isn’t it?”
She
slightly nodded her face full of shame, “but in school…”.
“Don’t
interrupt me, I have not finished yet. You say that you have initiative but
when I put you in the filling department instead of changing things for good
you complied with everything and just followed orders until you made a huge
mistake in just your second day, which speaks very bad of your touted
intelligence. Your responsibility is a joke, and your
team play well, you seem more like a team drag, you cost your team a day of
salary for each one of them. “
Lillian was
getting more nervous by the minute, she didn’t know how to handle Mr. Palmer
answer, she replied what came to her mind first in
regard his last phrase.
“I… I…really can be a team player, i… I can make mistakes but I take my responsibility and
protect the team”.
“Well, you
may have the chance to prove that later, anyway Team play is not nearly enough
to get a job so You better tell me some real assets or
I could not give you the position”
Lillian
felt very nervous, she didn’t know how to defend her case after being so
cruelly disarmed by Mr. Palmer, finally she blurted the last resource of the
mediocre applicants, the lamest asset that anybody can flaunt: “I am good
obeying orders…. Without questioning…”.
Mr. Palmer
seemed pleased with her answer and said, “Yes Lilly, I think that is your best asset, as
long as the orders are not too complex. You see, it is better to be sincere and
talk about your real assets instead of pretending to be a successful self
motivated responsible woman which we both know you
aren’t”
Lillian
blushed with humiliation but she didn’t dare to contradict him, she really
didn’t have much arguments right then.
“Ok. We
only need to test the second part of your statement and I quote ‘Without
questioning’, so come on, sit on my lap”.
Lillian was
in a trance like state, it was like the whole scene was part of a dream or a
nightmare, her pussy was dripping and she hopped he didn’t notice it. She
walked around the desk and sat on his left leg, she was very nervous and horny.
“Now, tell
me again about your assets”, said Mr. Palmer.
Lillian
lower lip was trembling, she looked at the floor and said, “I am very obedient…”, her voice was very insecure and barely audible.
“You
already said that, what else do you have?”
She
couldn’t talk anymore, her heart was beating too fast,
she simply took his hand and put it over her tits.
“OK, I see.
And what else?”
Lillian
respiration was short and fast, she raised his hand and first kissed his hand
and then sucked his index finger. She didn’t dare to look at him. Then she took
his hand and guided it to her pussy.
He smiled
and said, “That’s good, these assets and your obedience really can help you get
the cleaning girl position that you want so much, even when you are
unqualified. Let’s put your assets to work. Get on your knees… good. Now crawl under the desk… very good.”
He then
made his chair roll as close to the desk as he could. He opened the top button
of his pants, lowered the fly and let his cock out.
“Now, you
may suck it while I do some paperwork”
Lillian was
blushing red, but somehow being hidden under the desk made her feel a little
bit more at ease, at least he wasn’t seeing her now.
She never had sucked cock before but she had look a lot of porn so she knew
what to do, she started licking his balls and up and then started trying to
swallow as much of his dick as she could, she gagged a couple of times but then
managed to find the distance and rhythm to do it without gagging. Keystrokes
sounded lightly on the background as Mr. Palmer was typing something in his
computer. Lillian felt humiliated giving this man so much while he barely paid
attention, but it only aroused her more.
She concentrated in the task at hand, for a moment she forgot about her
predicament, she was just finally acting the fantasies that had filled her mind
in the last few days. Suddenly her abandonment was interrupted by Mr. Palmer voice, he was talking on the phone.
“Kathleen,
could you bring me some coffee please”
Lillian panicked
and stopped her blow job, she tried to be very still avoid making any sounds,
but Mr. Palmer said
“I didn’t
tell you to stop”
Lillian
continued her job, trying to be as quiet as possible. Just then the door opened
and she heard Kathleen entering the office. Kathleen was a tall blonde and Mr.
Palmer’s secretary. When Lillian met Mr. Palmer for the first time she had
thought that Kathleen was a slut. The reality was that Kathleen dressed in
conservative business attires but her skirts were a little shorter than mid
tight, they were maybe in the boundaries of what was acceptable for the office
but still she looked classy but sexy.
Lillian
remembered that first impression and thought, “Her attire was a thousand times
more conservative than the one I used today”. Kathleen put the coffee cup over
Mr. Palmer’s desk and looking at her puzzled face he said.
“She was
very nervous, so I let her use my private bathroom”.
“Oh. I see…
Boss I want to ask you a favor ”, said Kathleen.
Lillian
felt very ashamed sucking that man’s cock just a few feet away from that girl
that she once considered a slut but that now seemed like miles above her in
terms of moral, feminism and self respect.
Mr. Palmer
just made a hand motion encouraging her to talk
“You know,
Mark, my boyfriend just returned yesterday from his business trip to Spain and
he is inviting me to an expensive restaurant to celebrate. I am really looking forward to see him. I
really missed him so much, so I would like to leave early so I can do my hair…”, she said letting her excitement show in spite of her
effort to sound neutral and professional.
“Oh. A long
trip, an expensive restaurant, maybe Mark will finally get lucky”, said Mr.
Palmer playfully.
Kathleen
smiled warmly reflecting her emotions about Mark and her good relationship with
Mr. Palmer and she said, “No. Mr. Palmer, I’d love to, but he knows that I made
a promise and I am still a virgin and I will be until the day that we marry, fortunately it will be very soon. I’ll be graduating
my MBA this summer and then we will marry as soon as possible”
Lillian was
feeling more naked than ever, she had misjudged that girl and she was even a
virgin, “How could I have felt superior to her, she is a decent girl while I am
…. “, she didn’t dare to finish the phrase, she thought bitterly, “I am very bad at
judging people, all my supposed psychological ability to read people and to
anticipate their success is a joke. My opinion about her was as wrong as the
image of success I got of myself”
Before
Kathleen left the room, Mr. Palmer noticed that she had took a quick look to
the little piece of fabric folded over his desk. He noticed with satisfaction
that she seemed to identify it as Lilian’s shorts.
She of course couldn’t be sure, still she will probably gossip about it, and
that it was he wanted, a rumor but not a proved one.
Once
Kathleen left his office, he ordered Lillian to get out from under the desk.
She was blushing red. She looked at the floor humiliated. Mr. Palmer took
Lillian’s chin a made her look at his eyes. “Stop the
shy act, by the way that you sucked my cock I bet you have done it a lot of
times. No innocent girl does what you
just did. Well, it’s good for me anyway.
It’s good to do it with an experienced slut for a change”
Lillian
blushed with shame, for a moment she thought of replying, but her mind was
blank, she thought , “What could I say? That I am not
experienced but I look a lot of porn?”.
“You
convince me to hire you. See those papers? It is your new contract,
you will be working 4 hours a day for $8 per hour.”
Lillian
blushed, in a few days she passed from earning $25 to $12 and now $8.
“But before
you sign your contract, you have to sign this paper to prove me that you are
really a team player and that you will protect your team”
Lillian turned
to see him puzzled.
“See, there
were 8 people in the team including you. Each one earned 12/hour, a penalty of
8 hours for each member would cost you…768 dollars”
“But I…. I…
don’t have that money….I…”
The company
will lend you such amount and then discount you $120 per week, which is the
maximum allowed and you will get $40 in cash, at least for the next 6 or 7
weeks.
“I… I can’t
afford that… I already have problems to pay the rent with the new salary…
please sir”, Lillian had moved to a more expensive apartment outside the campus
the moment that she secured her internship, after all with $100 of daily income
she could afford something a little better. Now it seemed like a bad decision.
Mr. Palmar was implacable, he said, “No. Sign it if you want,
but if you don’t you may walk out of this office and I will be informing the
university of your firing and putting a complain of
your unprofessional behavior. “
Lillian
felt trapped, she could not let the university know about this, she had much troubles with her thesis already, she would lose her
cum laude for sure and things could even be much worse. She had to stay focused
on her objectives, and after all she already had sucked this man cock, wasn’t
that much worse than paying 768 USD?
“OK. Sir
I’ll sign it”
“Then bend
over the desk and do it while I review your other assets”
She bended
over the desk and was signing the papers when she felt Mr. Palmer penetrating
her vagina from behind. She felt very ashamed but at the same time she was
thankful, she was so horny that she just wanted, needed, deserved an orgasm, that came just a
few minutes after, followed closely by Mr. Palmer explosion.
A couple of
hours later she was showering in her apartment. She wanted to clean herself, to
retake control of her life. Mr. Palmer
was very cruel,
Lillian was reliving her
last moments in Mr. Palmer’s office.
After their orgasm and while she was still naked, she listened as he called the janitorial chief and told her
about Lillian and that he had hired her as a favor to her father who told him
that she needed some discipline. Her duty was going to clean an empty warehouse, he warned
her that Lillian wouldn’t use uniform because she was a temp but that she
needed to be strict because Lillian tended to dress too slutty. Then turning to Lillian he said, “If you come
to work with clothes that cover you more than the ones that you were wearing
today, you are fired. And don’t worry the janitorial chief may scold you but
can’t fire you”
Lillian was
depressed, she was completely ashamed of her behavior.
She wasn’t in shape to talk with Karen about sex, she didn’t want to talk about
sex in her entire life, it will only spark memories of
this shameful morning. She called Karen and told her that something had come up
and that she could meet with her that afternoon.
Lillian
decided to work in her thesis, she was unfocused and even the simple task of
making the literal transcript of the interviews was getting more and more a
challenge. The constant sexual
references were distracting her. After a
couple of hours her advance was little. She felt tempted to open one of her now
favorites porno sites but she resisted the temptation.
She went to her email trying to find something upbeat to encourage her, she had a bunch of spam and a few real emails. There
were a couple of emails from Barbara her thesis advisor. In the first one dated
the day before, she scolded her for missing the last appointment, she said she
was concerned because she was missing deadline after deadline and she would
need to work really hard to recover for the lost time, she finally urged
Lillian to send her immediately the transcripts of the interviews with her
interpretation. Lillian was afraid, she had not ended the transcripts and there
were interviews still missing and she hadn’t even started with her
interpretations. With dread she opened the second email received just an hour
ago, her counselor repeated that she was worried that Lillian hadn’t even
replied to her last email, “I think from your reaction (or lack of) that you
are falling behind and you had not anything to show yet. I am willing to wait a
week for you so you can put your notes and recordings in order but after your
antecedents with this project I need proof that you are really working on it. You may send
me copy of your tapes or at least send me a copy of that girl porno portfolio,
because at this moment I can’t even assure that you are really interviewing
someone in the industry”.
Lillian
apprehension returned, on one hand Ms. Barbara was showing her some mercy on
the other she had not much to show, the tapes were simply to shameful, without
her professional vocabulary and with her nervousness her interviews sounded
childish. If she had some transcripts and professional interpretations she
could claim that she used that language and behavior to gain her interviewed
trust, but at this moment they were simply shameful and she revealed to much of
herself, even when she had decorated the true it was still too personal and was
also very unprofessional. Her best
shoot was to get Karen’s portfolio. She called her but only got her voice mail.
She sent her an
SMS saying that she needed a sample of her “modeling” jobs.
Just a few
minutes later she received Karen’s reply. “No. That was not part of the deal
and it could affect my current job”.
Lillian was
afraid, so she insisted via another message, “It could be anonymous, you know
with your face hidden or something.”
Karen
responded with a simple “No. If you need that, find another person”.
Lillian
tried to stop things from getting worse, “No, Sorry, I won’t bother you again with
these kind of requests. Let’s restart the interviews tomorrow
.”.
She received a last laconic message, “Agree”.
Lillian
felt relieved but then she realized that her only chance was to finish some
presentable work for the next day. She however opened the rest of her email
first. One was from her landlord reminding her that the rent was due this
weekend and she had to pay $480, the
email was redacted in a very friendly way giving her a welcome and stating that
they appreciated having her as an inquiline but it
had also a note at the bottom reminding her of a clause in the contract that
stated that as it was her first payment
there would be absolutely no mercy, if she fail she will be evicted the very
next day and her deposit returned to her after 30 days if the property hadn’t
damages or liabilities.
Lillian was
getting more and more anxious, she expected her internship payment will help her cover those
expenses but the payments to Karen and her new diminished income made her
impossible to pay on time. She will have to think of something.
She went to
the kitchen and took a bottle of wine and started drinking to calm herself
down. She needed to relax, she drank a glass of wine and started feeling
better, she returned to her email.
She opened
the last email and found out it was from the depilation clinic, they thanked
her for her modeling session and they gave her a link
to the video. She clicked it with dread and found that it was just as she had
been told, her face was always blurred and her voice mostly blocked, even some
skin marks that she had on her right thigh had been Photoshoped,
otherwise she was visible in all her naked glory and in a very high resolution.
The page with her video showed a counter, “30 visitors”.
Lillian
shivered, 30 people had seen her naked and even spread to show all her charms.
She felt a tingle in her pussy. The idea that it was completely anonymous took
away the guilt and the fear leaving only the excitement of the situation. She wanted to know
how much further the counter would get, she wanted to feel the rush of being
seen by more and more people. She refreshed the page several times but only
after 15 minutes she only got “31 visitors”.
She was
getting frustrated, she wanted to feel the rush again but the site seemed stuck
at 31 and she thought , “Maybe most of them are
serious adult women just analyzing the procedure”. She needed more, she wasn’t
thinking clearly. She went to some amateur site and posted a link to the video
with the title, “College girl getting her pussy hair permanently removed by
laser”.
After an
exciting hour, she saw the counter grow from 31 to 300 and then to 500. Lillian
shivered with arousal, just the thought that more than
400 perverts had seen the video was overwhelming. She returned to the amateur
site just to see 10 comments and a bunch of thanks. Some of them had noticed
that her pussy was wet, and several requested the original poster to post more
pictures or videos of her.
She tried
to cool herself down. She closed her email and the amateur site and returned to
her wine. “I need to cool down a little bit if I want to get some work done. I
need something to get those images out of my head”. She turned on her tv and poured herself a second glass of wine.
A couple of
hours later, she had drank all the bottle and was
clumsily trying to type in her computer. She realized the futility of her
efforts, her mind was blank and her fingers seemed disconnected from her brain.
She thought, “I can’t advance too much for tomorrow. I need that portfolio, it is my only way out”
She
pondered the idea of calling Karen again but even as drunk as she was she
realized that a new call could make Karen brake her
commitment after all she seemed to be looking for an excuse to do it. “I don’t
know why is she so prudish, It is not big deal, I said her I will blur her
face, even I have a public video with my face blurred”, then her foggy mind
came to a realization, “hey, I could send photos of myself, who would know and
Karen and I have the same skin color.”.
She went
for her camera and put it with a little tripod over the kitchen table and she
sat over the couch in front of it. She used the timer to shout herself for a
total of 16 photos in 3 different positions. Laying face down on the couch,
laying face up covering her tits with her hand and sat with her legs wide open facing
the camera, again covering her tits with hands.
All the photos showed her smiling sexily, and her drunk
state was pretty clear. She opened the files on her computer and she was too
drunk too made a good editing, so she simply put a black square over her face
in each of the photos. She saved the ‘portfolio’ and before thinking, she sent
it to Barbara.
Feeling she
had accomplished her mission, she masturbated to sleep.
The next
day she awoke with a terrible headache. She vaguely remembered last night, then
suddenly a memory came to her mind and she panicked. She ran to her computer
and realized that she indeed had sent her naked photos to Ms. Barbara. Things
were spiraling down very quick. She really had to do a very professional work
with her thesis otherwise these stupidities could come back at her. She didn’t
want to go to her new job, she had decided last afternoon to never go back to
that company anymore, but now the possibility of Mr. Palmer calling her school
to report her firing and her lewd behavior would be simply devastating to her
sinking career. Lillian breathed deeply trying to remain focused. She tried to convince
herself, “There is still no real harm to my career. I just have to juggle these
balls for a little time and everything will be OK. I could even still get a cum
laude and put my career back on track. I just have to finish my thesis in a
professional way and keep my job for a few weeks and I am done. Given that I complied with the portfolio
requirement, I will ask Ms. Barbara for another week to show her my advance and
I will impress her with something really polished”.
Feeling more relaxed she planned her day, “Now I
only need something suitable to wear at work, my only daring outfit was the
volleyball uniform but if I wear it today everybody would relate me to the
ongoing gossip about my yesterday’s disgrace. My only hope to skip that shame
will be to wear something else”,
She then realized , “It is still early, Karen probably hadn’t left
her home”, so she called her. “Karen,
good morning….”, “no, don’t worry I won’t ask for your portfolio again…”, she said while thinking, “it is useless now anyway, Ms.
Barbara would notice the change of model immediately”, and continued her
talk, “No, I am wondering if you can
lend me an outfit…”, she tried to sound casual, but her voice was reflecting
her nervousness. “you know to take it to today’s interview… “, Lillian couldn’t come with a
reason why she wanted the outfit in advance, after all she was supposed to be
repulsed by those clothes but she really need them now, she invented, “I was
thinking… to knock at your door this afternoon wearing the same clothes that
you wore for your audition…. You know to empathize, to know how it feels to
wear them… you know… in public”.
Karen was
perplexed. She didn’t know what was it all about but she found the whole
situation amusing and quickly agreed.
Lillian was
more at ease when Karen arrived to her apartment and gave her the requested
slutty outfit. Karen then dressed into yet another one of Lillian’s business
outfit. She hadn’t returned her the other two but it was normal, she had to
clean them up first, still Lillian felt a knot in her stomach when she gave her
another one.
Lillian
dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, but put her slutty outfit in a backpack, She didn’t have snickers anymore, so she packed a pair of
flip flops. Once in the company, she
changed into the outfit that brought her humiliating thoughts, after all it was
the outfit that a porno model chose for an audition, and now she was wearing it
to work hopping that Mr. Palmer didn’t find it too modest for her. She breathed
deeply and then reported
to her new boss.
The morning
was mostly uneventful, she was scolded by her new boss that resulted an
overweight matron in her forties with very bad temper. For her having Lillian in her team was mostly
an annoyance. She instructed Lillian to sweep a large area of the warehouse. At
first the matron constantly corrected her technique but later she was mostly
left alone. At the end of her shift she was sweated and very tired. She put her jeans and t-shirt over her slut
clothes. She will make the commute decently dressed. Once in the train, she was
somewhat satisfied with her achievements so far, she had complied with Mr.
Palmer orders and had managed to preserve her job and her reputation for one
more day. It had been very tiresome and a bit humiliating to be treated like an
irresponsible child by that ignorant matron but she thought that she could bear
it long enough to fix her situation.
Her only
problem now was the rent. She had only $180 for rent and was $300 short. She
had ‘invested’ most of her savings in the $480 deposit and first rent. She
realized she could not afford to stay, even if she
could negotiate to pay later there was no way that she could catch up with that
amount of rent without her job. The worse part was that she knew it would be very hard to get a
department for only $180, the only ones in that price were the cheapest campus
accommodations and they were most probably already full by this time. She
regretted her decision once again but decided to stay focused. She could ask a
classmate to take her in for a few weeks but it would require a lot of
explaining and also would make very hard to keep her shameful job and
interviews a secret.
Lillian
decided that her best chance was to ask Karen for that favor. She could even
give her $20 per week or something. She concluded that she could make her
accept, she seemed a good person after all, but as she approached to her
destination she felt more and more insecure.
She arrived
at Karen’s apartment. The thought of living there was scaring and a disappointment
at this point in her life but beggars can’t be choosers. She went behind some stairs and took off her
shoes, jeans and t-shirt, she put her flip flops and stored her clothes and
shoes in her backpack and nervously walked to Karen’s door wearing only her
well sweated slut outfit that clung to her body like a second skin.
Karen
opened the door. She was surprised, Lillian looked really different, she looked not only slutty but cheap. Her hair was in a very
lose pony tail with strands mated to her face.
The little clothes were obscenely clinging to her body and she obviously
wasn’t wearing any underwear. She
smelled bad, it was hard to believe that she was just
returning from an office work. She looked like if she had walked all the way,
even worse than that, like if she had been exercising in a very dusty
environment.
“Come on
inside”, Said Karen. After she assimilated the surprise she could not avoid to enjoy the look, “No so high and mighty now”, she was
thinking. Karen was neatly dressed in a
business suit and in spite of the commuting not a single hair was out of place
and her makeup was still perfectly done. That fact didn’t go unnoticed to
Lillian who felt humiliated by the contrast.
Karen had
planned to change into jeans once in her house but now she wanted to stay as
she was for more time to enjoy the contrast.
She asked Lillian why she was so sweated but she didn’t answered. She
just asked for a shower and Karen pondered the situation. Lillian’s
stench was uncomfortable but it made her very insecure, so Karen decided to
hold a bit and said, “You better do your assignment first. You may use the
kitchen, just open the window please. No offense but you smell like the
building’s janitor”
Lillian
wanted to shower first but she didn’t want to contradict Karen, after all she
was going to ask her a big favor that very same day. So she went to the
kitchen, and after opening the window she used her computer to look for Karen’s
email and started to work in her ‘assignment’ watching a bunch of porn. Soon
she was getting horny, her notes about the scenes had become more and more
unarticulated over the last few days, they were so distracting so arousing that
it was getting hard for her to narrate them.
Her first person sentences were becoming simpler and simpler, “I am very
horny … a stud
is fucking my ass while I suck another cock, I lick their cum
from the floor”, she wanted desperate to touch herself but she could see Karen
reading some business book in the living room while taking notes in her laptop
that was in a little buffet table. Lillian felt even worse than the first time
she stayed in that Kitchen, now the kitchen felt too classy for a stenching cleaning girl. And Karen, looked so smart, it was
not only her dress but her concentration, she seemed to be flipping pages quite
fast and looked like she was accomplishing a lot of work.
Lillian
envied her, nowadays she could not concentrate in
anything for more than a few minutes before her mind started wandering towards
porn. She tried to fight her horniness but just the thought that Karen now
earned $29/ hour while she after the deductions to pay the debt made only $2
was extremely humiliating and oddly arousing. She could not avoid to touch her pussy and after a few minutes she was wantonly
masturbating with her hand under her short completely absorbed in the computer
screen. Her moans attracted Karen’s attention who
looked at her amused and satisfied.
Somehow the new Lillian was her creation and that made her feel more
powerful than ever. The excitement of the power to control Lillian was becoming
addictive.
Karen
continued her work, just glancing in Lillian’s direction from time to time.
Every time that Lillian turned to see her, she was busy with her book, so
Lillian turned bolder and had pulled down her shorts to her ankles and was
pushing three fingers noisily inside her pussy. Before she could orgasm for the
umpteenth time, Karen talk. Ok, Lillian time is over, send me the email with
your notes and you can take a shower. Lillian almost felt from the chair, and
pulled up her shorts as fast as she could, she realized that Karen had seen
her. She felt ashamed and her notes well, her notes were very short, she had stopped writing in the last few videos. She handed what we she had anyway and ran to
the shower.
Karen glanced Lillian’s notes. They didn’t reflect any education
and the lack of concentration was more than evident. It was obvious that
Lillian was having a hard time controlling herself. It was like if she had
unleashed some very powerful bottled force.
Lillian
showered for a long time, she had to cool down and she wasn’t ready to face
Karen after what she just saw. She was
completely ashamed. But after a while she couldn’t postpone her exit anymore.
She wrapped the small towel that Karen gave her, it
barely covered her nipples and the top part of her pussy at the same time. She
would have to ask for her jeans and t-shirt but she knew Karen would not give
them back until the end of the interview.
Lillian
approached Karen. She blushed and looked at the floor. “Sit”, said Karen.
And Lillian
complied. She was to ashamed to talk and her mind was very confused and unfocussed to restart the
interview, the details of what she should ask today escaped her mind. She just
wanted to leave right then, well no, she wanted to ask Karen for a place to
stay and then leave.
Karen broke
the uncomfortable silence. “Let’s clear
this thing first so we can talk. Yes I noticed that you were touching yourself,
and no is not a big deal. It is just what healthy young women do when exposed
to such stimulating scenarios. Don’t worry I don’t judge you and you were
discrete enough”, that last part was a complete lie, “but even if you weren’t
we are all girls here, I understand you and I really don’t care”.
Lillian felt
relieved, the fact that Karen wasn’t judging her was tranquilizing her, still
she was unable to talk, she simply didn’t know how to
respond or what to say.
Karen
enjoyed the unarticulated Lillian and said, “Well, let’s forget about that and
proceed with the interview. What do you have in mind for today?”
Lillian
blushed, she was clueless, she simply hadn’t planned
anything for today’s interview. The reality was that her mind was filled with
just one idea: To make Karen accept her as guest for a few weeks so she could
stand on her feet again.
“K..Karen….I
have not…. You know …. Prepared an interview for today…. I had…
well.. a hard day… and …. And I want to ask you … a big favor”
“What?”
“I need a
place to stay… just for a few weeks..”
“What
happened to your apartment?”
Lillian was
very confused, she did not know what to say to save some face,
finally she decided to tell the truth, well sort of
“I made a
mistake in my job, a costly mistake and I have to pay them a lot of money and I
can’t afford to lose that job right now because I need those work hours in
order to graduate and I don’t think I can find anything else because by now all
the internship jobs are already taken. Next month I will receive my rent
deposit and I would be able to rent another place again.”
“A costly
mistake”, Karen
repeated and Lillian blushed ashamed. Karen was amused and thought, “While I am
starting to build a solid career path, this snob is falling.”,
just thinking that she was contributing to derailing this girl career was exhilarating.
She knew it was cruel but the power rush was just too much and she could not
avoid to project to Lillian all the hate that she had felt during the last
couple of years for those girls that had it too easy and felt so superior
making her feel like shit.
Karen knew
that having Lillian living there would be an annoyance but on the other hand
she could not avoid to think that having Lillian there
she could easily control her and made her fall further. She was curious to know
how much farther from her goals she could make Lillian go. She had a little
voice inside her trying to stop her but the mixed memories of the first
interviews with the fancy dressed and ever judging Lillian and all those mighty
rich girls in her past were enough to clear any remorse.
“You know
this place is small. Why don’t you go with a college friend? You must have rich
friends that are more able to help you than I am”.
Lillian
expected that. The place was small indeed, just two small bedrooms with a
shared bathroom and an open area that had the living room and the kitchen which
had a small table for four. She replied what she had practiced
“My
friend’s places are already full. You
know… the college’s apartments are smaller than this and…”
The reality
was that she had not so close friends and that many of her classmates would
greatly enjoy the reason of her need. Just to have to explain that she had been
demoted and that she had to leave her apartment due to her poor planning was
too shameful.
“It is hard
for me to believe that but OK. Still I don’t get it why you can’t afford a
small apartment. I know that they could not take more than 75% of your salary,
so you must be doing $125 a week”, She knew Lillian that she worked 4 hours
daily and that her salary was $25 per hour, after all that was why she asked
for $29, just to earn a little more than Lillian.
Lillian blushed, she didn’t expect that Karen did the math. If she
could make at least that money, she could afford a low rent apartment, tomorrow
she will receive $400 from her trust fund and in other circumstances she could
use the whole amount to pay for the first month and the deposit of low rent
apartment and she could live from those $125 a week the rest of the month but
the reality was that she would only make $40 a week after the deductions and she
still have to pay $20 a week or transportation.
“I… I…
don’t have enough money for the deposit and the first rent…. And it is too
rushed to find something in just a couple of days…”
“So you are
just a couple of days of being evicted?”
“No.. well yes…”, Lillian was feeling
more and more insecure and being covered just by an small towel didn’t help at
all, “…Please, wait a second I am going to dress and I’ll be back immediately…
to answer all your questions…”
Karen was
enjoying the situation a lot, and sensed
there was more that Lillian was hiding, “No, there is no need, we are all girls
here and we need to settle solve this fast, my roommate is about to come. Maybe I can help you to find something, at
least provisionally, you told me that you received $400 a month for your expenses, that is enough for a rent and a deposit in a place
like this, you may pay the rest of your expenses from your salary, let’s say
$20 for transportation and $100 for food and other expenses. I could talk with
my landlord right now, there are several vacancies in
this building.”
“No… I
can’t afford it now….”, she was biting her lower lip
and looking at the floor.
“Why? Did
anything else happen?”
“Yes…. I
was… I was demoted… because of my mistakes… and my salary…”,
she said without taking her eyes from the floor. She didn’t complete the
phrase, her voice faltering. It was so
humiliating to let somebody know her shame but it was better than telling
anyone related to her college life, it would be unbearable.
“I see”,
said Karen amused, “and what is your salary now?”
Lillian
hesitated for a moment, she was ashamed and thought of lying but it would only
make things worse.
“$8 per
hour”, she said almost in a whisper.
Karen almost
laughed, but managed to control herself. The amount of the damage was bigger
than she thought. “$8 per hour! You may make more in a
McBurger! What kind of position pays that low, cleaning ?”
Lillian
didn’t answer.
Karen
interpreted Lillian’s silence as an acknowledgement. She was high on her power,
this was just too fun.
“OK. I see
that you don’t have many alternatives. I would like to help you, maybe you
could sleep in this couch, it would be a little uncomfortable for us, this is
where we watch tv and all…”,
Lillian had
expected to share Karen’s room but still she jumped at the chance. “I’ll do my
best to avoid being an annoyance, if you are here I may go to the kitchen and …”,
“That could
help but my roommate… well I don’t think she would agree. After all we work hard and why would we
support a rich girl?”
Lillian was
thinking “a rich girl… ha… all of my money is trapped in a very strict trust
fund designed by my late parents to help me graduate from an Ivy University”.
For a moment she relived the rage to her parents for treating her like a little
girl even after their death but quickly she returned to the task at hand.
“Please
Karen… there must be a way.”
Karen kept quiet for a couple of minutes. She
looked concentrated and typed something in her computer, while Lillian
nervously waited.
“OK. There
is only a way to manage this but you have to agree to everything I say. What I
am asking you to do is not a whim of mine, this could cause me a lot trouble
with my roommate and it could cost me a lot in the long run so it had to be my
way or nothing at all.”
“OK”, said
Lillian who was a little more at ease, after all she was about to solve her
housing problem.
“1. You’ll
be my little cousin Lilly from Indiana, you’ll be 18, otherwise my roomy will
think you are too old to be helped. You are just out of high school, maybe
dropped out. You came to California looking for a modeling job in the porno
industry and you want me to show you the ropes and in the meanwhile you work as
a cleaning girl. That would help her to sympathize with you because she is a
former porno model.”
Lillian’s
head was spinning, she didn’t expect to be forced to
pretend to be somebody else. The idea of being a cleaning girl aspiring to be a
porno model humiliated her and aroused her to no ends.
“2. We will
go tomorrow to your apartment and pick all your belongings. You will lend me
all your business clothes while you are living here, and I will say to my
roommate that I bought them second hand, we can’t say they are yours because my
roomy will suspect. You will fill one suitcase with the clothes and belongings
that you want to bring to my house. We
will put the rest in a storage facility”.
Lillian was
stunned, things were deteriorating fast. She could not even talk.
“3. Money.
I need to sweet the deal to my roomy so she doesn’t bark. I will offer to give
her $100 for
this month rent and to cooperate with $35 each week for your food and other
expenses. Of course you’ll pay for that and of course you’ll pay for the
storage which according to this site is $70 per month and the transportation of
your belongings to the storage center in a pick up
truck that I can get for $100.”
Lillian
started mentally making numbers. Seeing her confused face, Karen handed her a
calculator. Lillian saw that her cost of staying four weeks will be $410, but
she will have food and board. She had to
pay anything else with her $20 a week income after deductions and
transportation. She will even have to
pay $10 from that money.
Lillian
knew she had to stop all that non-sense, but she couldn’t think of another
solution, not in a so short notice. She could go to a hotel just to get more
time to think and find another affordable place but she will have to pay for
the truck and the storage anyway and each day would reduce her options as she could not afford
more than a few days in a cheap hotel, maybe 10 or 12.
“Ok. But
you still help me with my thesis right? after all you
will use my business outfits and all.
“Yes, don’t worry but you will owe me one. This will take a lot of work and a lot of lying . One more
thing Lillian, while inside the apartment you have to look the part. Do you
have any cash? “
“Well… I
have $60. Why?”
“Listen,
most of your casual clothes are expensive designer jeans and trademark shirts,
that will ruin the lie, so
I will lend you some outfits to wear while you are here and you
should keep your clothes hidden. But I don’t have much
clothes that fit you, so you will have to buy a small wardrobe in the second
hand shop. With your money you may buy maybe 5 outfits, but don’t forget that they should be
something daring, after all you must pose for a girl wanting to model naked.
There is a store just around the corner, you should go
there before going home.”
…
A few hours
after that, she was alone in her own apartment contemplating her new outfits
with some remorse. Mr. Palmer’s dress code rule and the fact that she was
extremely horny while shopping didn’t help at all. All the outfits were
extremely skimpy, a mini dress, three very small shorts and a couple of equally
revealing micro skirts, a couple of tube tops that left her shoulders and navel
exposed, one of them barely reached the bottom of her tits. A couple of button
up shirts, one of them missing several buttons and a little thank top. It
seemed that her navel and legs won’t find refuge for a while.
She modeled
her new clothes in front of the mirror for a while. She looked cheap and
slutty, “It is not too much, I have seen classmates wearing worse things on Halloween”, but she thought
bitterly, “but they were never would go to work dressed like that”. For a
moment she considered if that long time could have any permanent effect on her
personality or self image, for a moment her old self started a philological
analysis of the situation. A few theories and experiments came to her mind. She
knew that nobody will really listen to her ideas while dressed in those
outfits, that nobody will see her as a successful woman but as an ignorant
tramp. Men will look for one night stands instead of a relationship, women will
only have contempt, even if she gives the right answer she will considered
dumber than any
better dressed peer. She knew that the constant negative reinforcement could
affect her ego, her own self image. She could end believing what others see in
her is true. It was too painful to think
about it seriously, instead her mind started wondering, if she turned off the reality a little
bit, she found herself aroused by the idea of people thinking of her as a
bimbo. It was so humiliating and oddly so arousing.
It was getting late and she was tired but she
took her last bottle of wine and turned on her computer. She wanted a little
farewell party to ease the pain of leaving her beloved apartment and soon she
was drinking and looking at porn. She browsed the forum where she had posted
the link to her laser depilation video. There were a lot of new requests for
more photos or the identity of the girl. The comments were so praising but so
dirty and so objectifying. For most of the posters Lillian was nothing but the
carrier of that pussy, somehow being reduced to that made Lillian rub her pussy
with frenzy. At some point she was so horny and so drunk that she clicked on the folder
with the photos that she had sent to Ms. Barbara. The ones that showed her
naked body in all her glory but that she had edited by putting a black squares over
her face. With trembling hands she uploaded one that showed her posing face
down in the couch which really showed her great ass. When she refreshed the
post and she could see the new photo, she almost came. Breathing fast she
uploaded a second one with her laying face up and covering her tits with her
hand. It hinted that her tits were small but her legs looked great. She
contemplated the third photo, her heart was beating fast. This photo showed her
siting on the sofa with her legs spread as far as she
could, she was again hiding her tits so all the attention concentrated in her
hairless pussy. Her arousal was clear in her puffy and very wet lips. Her respiration
was getting fast and short, her face was bright red with shame and arousal, she
even edited the post to add some text, “She is Lilly,
a college student from California. Isn’t she a big slut?”.
After she
posted she masturbated to orgasm.
The post
had a very quick response and before the night ended, with humiliating comments
about “Slut Lilly”. Lilly masturbated several more times reading the comments
and seeing her own photos and videos until she fall
sleep.
The next
day she woke up late and simply skipped work. She had a terrible hangover but
the moral hangover was even worse. She tried to withdraw the photos from the
forum but found that it was impossible, apparently it
was very common that people regretted their posts sooner or later so the site
simply obviated the delete option. By then her posts had 3000 readings and
quite a few thanks and responses, most of them asking for more photos. Some of
them asked for photos showing her face or in a more daring poses or situations.
Lillian was
pale, “3000 readers”, She kept repeating to herself, a
few weeks ago only one man had seen her naked and now her body was intimately
known by 3000 people. She was getting very apprehensive, “This could have
lifelong consequences, Those photos could come back
and chase me in the future. What if I become a famous and successful woman and
somebody shows those photos, it would be so embarrassing and so shameful. How
can I be so stupid to post my real name and state, somebody could recognize
me”, But then she cooled down, “3000 is a lot of people, but in terms of the
world population is a very small number, so the probability that one that knows
me personally had seen the photos are very low and even in that case, the
probability that he recognizes me is very little and even if he did, my face is
hidden so I’d simply deny it’s me ”.
She dressed informally but conservative with Jeans and
a t-shirt and tried to work on her thesis to forget about this new nightmare
and as a matter of fact she advanced a bit on her literal transcripts, she didn’t feel like doing
anything that required more mental effort. Before she knew, Karen was knocking
at her door to help her pack and make the transportation arrangements.
The whole
process was a lot more stressful than Lillian had anticipated. Karen had come
prepared with quite a few boxes, markers and tape. First she had to carefully
pack every business outfit and even several casual but expensive outifits in a couple of big boxes for Karen. Then Karen
made her pack every piece of jewelry, every equipment
that she possessed. Including her stereo, smart phone and her tv. Karen even brought an used
pink laptop and started copying all of Lillian’s documents and bookmarks from
her computer. Seeing Lillian’s desperation she said, “That is a very expensive
laptop, my roomie won’t believe you are in need if
you have all that equipment, but I understand you need a computer to finish
your thesis, so I borrowed this one from a friend. It will make your character
more believable, and don’t worry you will have the key to the storage, you may
access all your belongings anytime you want.”.
Karen also
brought a suitcase, it was all ragged and was midsize, Lillian looked at it in
disbelief, there is no way that she could fit her
things in such a brief space. “Karen, I already put my most needed things in
this pair of suitcases”. The suitcases
were full size and looked almost new.
“No
Lillian, you know those expensive suitcases just won’t cut it, and we can’t use
boxes or something if we want to make it believable that you just arrived. Let
me help you. Let’s put the content of
the suitcases over the bed.
Karen
observed in disbelief how Karen started to fill her suitcase with her new
slutty clothes, her old volleyball uniform and then added a couple of old jeans
and a few of the t-shirts that looked less expensive. She put just a couple of
underwear sets and from her toiletries and makeup she only packed her
toothbrush and a bright pink lipstick that she never used. Her special shampoo
and soaps went directly to a box, as well as her expensive makeup kit. She
begged to Karen, “Please at least let me have the base, I need it to cover my
freckles, otherwise people would think I am a tee…”, she interrupted herself
but Karen finished her sentence, “otherwise people will think you are a
teenager, but that’s exactly the point isn’t it?”. Lillian didn’t answer, just
looked how Karen put her purse and a couple of handbags in the boxes. “Hey I
need that!”.
“You may
use this”, say Karen, giving her an old small backpack. The backpack had no
shape and was nothing more than a bag with straps, it’s
color was un-discernible, it was once probably red or pink but now it looked
mostly gray.
Karen instructed Lillian to
put her vast collection of high heel shoes in boxes and just packed the only
pair of flat shoes that she possessed. She was wearing flip-flops and feeling more and more
nervous. She shouldn’t have agreed to
all that crazy shit that Karen imposed over her. She wanted to back off but she was out of
ideas. Lillian and the driver went back and for taking boxes to the pickup
truck until finally, everything but her suitcase was there. Lillian was all
sweated and wanted to take a bath.
“Lillian,
there is no time to take a bath, the storage will close soon”
Lillian
summoned her courage and decided to stay firm, she
won’t let Karen manage her like that. “No.
Karen I will take a bath now”, and with that she marched to the
bathroom. She took a long shower, and she felt better than any time in that
day, or the last few days for that matter. It was maybe because of her
assertion somehow empowered her or maybe it was because the soothing properties
of the long bath or a combination of both. But when she finished she found her
apartment completely empty, there were no boxes, no suitcases just the old
backpack and a little handwritten note.
“Lillian, I
know you are a bit stressed by the moving and I understand that you had to
change but I really had to go, the storage closes in less than an hour and we
had to get there, make the contract and download the boxes, all before closing
time. We can’t postpone it for tomorrow because I already hired the truck and you
promised your landlord to leave the apartment today so he could give you back
your deposit back in 30 days.
I understand
that you were not thinking clearly, so I decided to help you, otherwise it
would cost you $100 from the truck and maybe the lost your $450 deposit. I went to the storage, and took your purse
to pay for it as we agreed. Our little arrangement for a month will cost you $410, you had $390, so you owe me $20. I left you clothes and
your bus card in the backpack, the landlord already have
the keys.”
Lillian
panicked her landlord could come any minute. She was angry at Karen, and angry
to herself. She felt stupid and childish, her bath
could have cost her $530, maybe more. Her self confidence was flying away from
her, if Karen wouldn’t be helping her, she would have done a very costly
mistake. She opened the backpack and found her flip flops, the bus card and the
outfit Karen selected, it was one of her new slutty outfits a little yellow short and a pink tank
top that didn’t cover her navel, and that was it, there was no underwear. She
dressed and tried to comb her hair with her fingers but she was doing a very
sloppy job. She found a rubber band in the bathroom and she arranged her hair
in a ponytail.
She looked
at herself in the full body mirror in her room. She almost didn’t recognize
herself, she looked younger,
but that was just the tip of the iceberg, she remembered the way she looked when she
saw this very same mirror for the first time. She had just finished negotiating
the rent contract with the landlord and feeling that she could eat the entire
world in one bite. She was wearing a business suit: a perfectly tailored dark
skirt went bellow her knees, a white long sleeved blouse, a dark blazer, a
pantyhose and an expensive pair of high heels. A discrete gold jewelry set of
ring, necklace and earing completed the success
image.
Lillian
shivered, instead of that businesswoman of just a few weeks ago the mirror
showed a young tramp, a cheap young tramp. Just the thought of leaving the
apartment looking like that overwhelmed her with humiliation, shame, disgust,
fear, and arousal. She could not avoid to think that she looked like those teen porn models that
she had been looking at a lot lately. They usually didn’t wear a bra, even when
they had tits bigger than hers, but they always wore panties, even when they
were mere thongs that didn’t really cover anything. The thought that she was less dressed than
them and that she will be trapped most of the time in that character for an
entire month almost made her cry but at the same time her shorts were starting
to show a little wet spot.
She put her
towel in her backpack and quickly got out of her apartment. When she closed the
door behind her she felt a tight in her stomach. She felt like if she was
leaving part of her life, an important part of her life behind. She didn’t dare
to take her sight from
the floor, just the thought that one of her neighbors, well former neighbors
could see her like that ashamed her to no ends. She looked out of place walking
like that in that nice neighborhood. When she finally climbed her bus she tried
to reassure herself thinking that she would have complete access to her stuff,
well except for her business clothes that she would have to ask Karen for if
she needed them. That thought gave her some piece of mind.
She went to sit in the back of the bus, trying
to avoid the gazes of the passengers that started to fill the bus. But her
hopes of being ignored was short lived when some high school students boarded
the bus and started hitting on her, she was so surprised that she didn’t know
what to say, she simply blushed and kept quiet while looking at the floor. One
boy sat beside her, and started to casually touch her tights, she felt her face
so hot that she thought it would explode. She didn’t want to get the other
passengers attention, so she simply pushed the boy’s hand away. The boy took
the weak response as a ‘go’ signal and restarted his touch, this time he was a
little bit bolder touching the hem of her short. Lillian was so aroused, she
put the boy’s hand away and turned to see the boy with the most stern sight that she
could make at the time which due to her state of arousal wasn’t as tough as she
intended. The boy put his hand again over her legs, touching skin and the
short’s fabric. His hand was very close to her longing pussy, she tried to
sustain her though sight but she simply couldn’t, she was overwhelmed by her arousal. She
looked down and the boy felt encouraged to go for the killing and started a
heavy petting session, right there on the bus, he was rubbing her pussy while
touching her tits and giving her an occasional kiss in the mouth. Lillian
breath was becoming short, the whole scene was surrealistic, she was dressed
like a teen slut but she wasn’t like that,
was she?, her mind tried to
fight, to stop acting like that, but her body felt so god. She closed her eyes
trying to abstract herself from the situation when she was returned to reality
by the voice of the driver. “Hey, you two, get out of my bus immediately. This
is not a motel little lady”. She was shinning red when she stepped down from
the bus under the scornful sights of the rest of the passengers. Fortunately
the boy didn’t follow her.
An hour
later she arrived at Karen’s home. She was tired, she felt insecure, she was mistaken for a high school girl once again during
her long walk to Karen’s home. It was hard to overcome the way everybody looked
down at her, like if she had no value, no future, she felt defeated.
When Karen
opened the door, she looked at the mousy slutty girl in front of her and
smiled. The contrast of the high and mighty Lillian of a few weeks ago was just
too much. Lillian interpreted the smile as a welcome and fell a little bit
comforted.
That
evening she met Megan, Karen’s roommate. Megan was an extroverted and very talkative
25 years old Afro-American woman. She immediately approved Lillian’s wish of
entering the porno industry. “I was in the industry myself, but I left it
because a boyfriend asked me to quit. I got this job as an organizer and
photographer of parties and events and I found the job pretty entertaining even
when the payment is not as good. I think you got future, young innocent looking
models are always on demand, but you need to get rid of your shyness or you
will freak out in the auditions. I am a photographer,
I can get some equipment and take some nude pictures of you to start your
portfolio”.
Just
hearing Megan’s words Lillian blushed, she tried to avoid that without
destroying her cover. “I think I am not ready yet”, she said in a low voice.
“Yes I see
that. I think it would help you get down your inhibitions if you remained
topless when you are here. We are only women after all”.
Lillian
tried to resist but when Karen insisted that it was a good idea, she ended
accepting. It was weird to be barefoot and wearing only the little yellow
shorts while the two other women were fully dressed,
and she had no privacy, her ‘room’ was the living room and both girls looked at
tv until very late.
The next
day she went to her cleaning job. The morning was mostly uneventful,
she had to stand the rage of her boss for her absence. She said, “You need some
serious discipline, I think I am going to fire you right now”, Lillian couldn’t
know that she wasn’t allowed to fire her, so she begged and accepted her
insults when she called her a “little tramp” and finally said, “Well you’ll
have to do the work of yesterday and today”.
A few hours
later she was traveling in a bus completely exhausted. She didn’t change back
into jeans and t-shirt,
she simply was too tired, she had put her decent clothes in her
backpack and made the commute in her slutty clothes.
When she arrived Karen’s home she used her new key to enter. She
washed her slut clothes and took a long shower then she dressed again in her
volleyball outfit. She tried to start working on her thesis, she took her
computer and looked at her email and found one from Ms. Barbara.
“Lillian,
we need to talk about your project. Your proof that you are really interviewing
a model was insufficient,
You may call me or you may get me some real studio photos of your
friend. Time is running out, I can help you and move the deadlines a bit in
order to accommodate your advance but I need a proof that you are really
working on this. Next week I have to certify that all the
thesis I am tutoring are indeed original works and have no other ethic fails
like fabrication. To be honest, I don’t feel confident to certify the
authenticity of your work. Your false
start with the fabricated interviews and your lack of mayor advances are raising
my doubts. I have to be extra careful and you are not giving me anything to
reassure myself. You are missing deadlines, your
current work is too superficial. I still have faith in you, just give me
something to be confident, if I you can’t give me something this week I will
put your work on probation and inform the committee ”. Ms. Barbara sounded desperate,
the reality was that her job was on the line, if she took the wrong decision
and was fooled again with some academic fraud she would be surely fired.
Lillian was
pale, she couldn’t face a committee, not now, her work was seriously delayed
and she didn’t feel self-confident enough to face a bunch of old teachers and
talk about porn, and worse, they will be questioning her seriousness. It will
be too stressful. No, she had to avoid that. She thought, “I need some studio
photos of Karen, now! I can’t wait anymore.”, She
tried to find something but the rooms where closed, however she could see a few
photos in the living room portraying Karen in bikini. She was beautiful, Lillian started to mentally compare herself with
Karen. Karen was taller and had bigger tits, her hair was black and she had a
tattoo in her navel and a big birth mark under her right tit … Lillian paled,
“Oh no, Ms. Barbara will instantly notice that the photos are not from the same
person”. Lillian started to hyperventilate, she had no way out, she was fucked,
she was simply too stupid or too drunk when she decided to send photos of
herself in the first place. She forced herself to calm down and after a few
minutes of breathing exercises she was able to think on her problem
and came to a painful conclusion. The only way out was to have nude studio
photos of herself, she had to take Megan’s offer as soon as possible.
She didn’t
advance further in her thesis that afternoon. She was simply too nervous and
full with anticipation and anxiety to think clearly. Instead she ended looking
at some basic porn to remember the modeling poses and trying to figure out how
to make Megan do the session as soon as possible.
When Karen
arrived she interviewed her for a little time, without any serious advance.
Finally Megan arrived and Lillian felt a lot of apprehension. She definitely
needed some nude photos of herself that looked professional and her only mean
to get them was Megan but it was just too shameful and she felt somewhat
intimidated by Megan extroverted personality.
“Hey
Lillian how are you? Nice clothes…”
Lillian
blushed, she knew she was dressed like a slut and only managed to say, “thanks” in a meek voice.
“What about
our little rule? You are too shy, if you don’t loose a little bit you won’t be able to do an audition.
Come on, give me that blouse”, and then added, ”Karen,
I need you to help me with this. We said she should be topless at all times
when she was in the apartment, otherwise she will never overcome her shyness”
“Megan is
right Lilly”
Lillian
blushed and was starting to take off her top when she stopped and said, “No, it
is not necessary, I think I can handle a photo session, as a matter of fact I
was thinking of asking Megan to do my portfolio”
Karen was
surprised, but then she thought, “She is surely trying to avoid being topless
and still be on character, but that won’t work with me”
“I think
that is wonderful Lilly! I think Megan could book her studio in maybe three
days or so. It is a very busy studio, and we don’t want you to chicken out and
waste the opportunity, so you must be prepared and prove us that you are ready”
Megan was
amused, she could use the studio that night if she wanted and Karen probably
knew it, but she saw that Karen was maybe trying to pull her cousin’s leg and
she decided to join in, she was enjoying the visit, she was bisexual but she
rather liked girls and her roommate was definitely straight but her cousin….
Well it was hard to know but she definitely will give her a try or at least
have some fun.
Megan said, “Karen is right, I can book the
studio in three days, but I maybe wouldn’t have another chance to book it for a
couple of weeks, so you will have to be ready by then but I still see you are
too shy. I won’t book the studio if you are still so uncomfortable to take off
your clothes even in front of only us that we have to remind you every time. If
you think you are brave enough for a studio session, you should commit to be
completely naked all the time that you spend in the apartment.”