("`-''-/").___..--''"`-._ `6_ 6 ) `-. ( ).`-.__.`) (_Y_.)' ._ ) `._ `. ``-..-' _..`--'_..-_/ /--'_.' ,' (((' (((-((('' (((( K R I S T E N' S C O L L E C T I O N _________________________________________ WARNING! This text file contains sexually explicit material. If you do not wish to read this type of literature, or you are under age, PLEASE DELETE THIS FILE NOW!!!! _________________________________________ Scroll down to view text -------------------------------------------------------- Copyright © 1997 losgud. Personal use just fine. Archiving okay. Absolutely NO for-profit use permitted. Reposting without notice is frowned upon. Tampering with the text (rewriting) is illegal. Copyright violations will fall under the jurisdiction of my principality, where the punishment is to discourage repeat offenders. We cut your fucking hands off! -------------------------------------------------------- The Birthday Party by Losgud (losgud@hotmail.com) *** A guy and his wife plan a romantic weekend together when his sister stops by and changes everyone's plans in a big way. (MFF, bi, inc, mast, oral, threesome, humor) *** My wife and I have birthdays ten days apart. This year I decided to do something special to celebrate. Janey's was the previous Monday, mine the upcoming Thursday, so for this weekend between I developed a plan. By the time I'd finished with the preparatory part I was feeling physically beaten. Hustling around town in all the Friday after-work traffic, and then the arrangements with the kids nearly fell apart. Man, I don't know. It was all set up that they'd be staying overnight at our friends' place. Their kids and ours get along fine, and we've had this reciprocal agreement for well over a year. If anything, we were owed a few sleepovers. I get there, they put up a stink, start hemming and hawing, and in the end ask for a baby-sitting fee. A stiff one. In cash. In advance. Some friends! I added to my mental lists. Tonight: hit the bank machine on the way home. Tomorrow: lose the friends. My plan entailed either a nice dinner out, or else a nice dinner in. I had the cash in my wallet and the goods in the fridge. I'd leave it up to Janey what we'd have to eat. For dinner, that is. Dessert, well... I had this vague vision of donning our birthday suits and partying all night long. With no interruptions, or the hint or possibility of interruption. We live in about the tiniest house imaginable. Any smaller and it'd be a pioneer cabin on the prairie. It seems fairly common that a couple's first child is regarded as a miracle of sorts. But I save that designation for our second one. I mean, the big miracle was that we ever managed to find the moment of privacy to mix together the vital ingredients. There was talk for awhile of having a third, but it never amounted to anything but talk. By the time I got back from dropping the kids I was in a pretty sour mood. It would have been so much easier if my sister the super-Aunt had been able to take the kids. That was the original schedule, but then she'd begged off because of some last minute plans of her own. Shit, now I'd have to be getting up at dawn to get the kids before our friends sold them on the baby market. Needless to say I was not happy to see the car parked in front of our house. That would be Sheila. What was she doing over? The thing about my sister is that she never just popped in for a minute. If she came in the door she stayed in the door for hours. Janey and Sheila can just yack and yack and yack. I should be glad that the two of them are such fast friends, but that's always been a given. They're the same age, a year older than me, and they first met their freshman year in college. I'd heard great tales of Janey more than three years before I met her. Sheila brought her home for Thanksgiving their final year, and I just happened to be home from my university as well. Janey snuck into my room and jumped my bones the very first night and I've been an addict ever since. It wasn't until after we were married that Janey let it slip that she'd been badgering Sheila on my account for quite awhile. So Sheila, is there another one like you at home, but with a dick. Oh my, he's cute. I think I'll take him! So much for all that nonsense about chance, fate and free will. Shooting fish in a barrel, that's how I was landed. I get along great with Sheila. There's always a bit of that Bossy Older Sister Syndrome. And the confusion of growing up. First I was in love with her; she was the perfect idol. Then she turned into a yucky girl and I loathed her. Then she turned into a yummy girl and I entered a period of vague lust. Now that we're all grown up we have one of those rare sibling relationships. It's not the shared history and blood that binds us. I like hanging around with her because I genuinely like her. Not that any of this made me any happier to see her sitting in my living room. Sitting and sitting in my living room. After a brief greeting, the two of them continued chatting away. As though I hadn't come in. They were hogging the sofa between them, which left me to sit in one of the uncomfortable chairs. Buy some comfortable chairs, I noted. I seized a pause in their conversation to say just that. "Hey Janey, how about we go out sometime and buy some chairs designed to be sat in?" She graced me with a blank look, gave a quick shake of her head, then answered, "That sounds good, honey. Whatever you say, Ray. Whatever you want." And then they went on talking about other things. Well, what I wanted had nothing really to do with chairs except as props. Anytime the talk veered towards a subject that might allow me to enter in with a comment, my comment was brushed aside and the conversation quickly steered elsewhere. I sat around trying not to be too grim, but eventually I was fed up. I took to my feet and stood there for the longest time without being noticed. Eventually I poked Sheila's knee with the toe of my shoe. "Hello! What are you doing here anyway? I thought you had plans for tonight." "I do," Sheila responded crisply. Oh, I was in a pissy evil mood. "Oh yea? What? You gonna get laid or something?" "As a matter of fact," she leveled a very cool gaze at me, "that's exactly what I intend to do. All in good time." "What's your problem Ray?" Janey came to her defense. "If you're in a bad mood, why don't you stuff it in your pocket and go away." I gave up. I shrugged and left the room, heading into the kitchen for a beer. There were some snorting sounds, and then peals of laughter behind my back. I stormed off down into the basement to work on my project. Cellar is a more apt description of the space. It's squat and chilly and damp, but it's all mine. I have a workbench down there, with tools. I'm a woodworker, or a sculptor, or something. I don't have any artistic pretensions, I just need a title to define what I do. It involves a large hunk of tree trunk, like a chopping block, that was one of the deluxe features that came with the house. I never felt like summoning the strength or friends to help me lug it up the stairs and outside. Since then I've added to it. Scraps of boards, nails. Some artists use brushes or chisels. Me, I got a hammer. It's hard to say exactly what I'm making, or if it'll ever be finished. I have my doubts. Its purpose is pretty obvious. When I'm about to boil, I come down here and blow off steam. The therapeutic value of banging nails with a hammer. I envision the day when I stand back and see it as complete, and then I'll haul it up and mount it out in the yard. Already I've given it a title. "My Anger, Dispelled." Of course when I consider the likelihood of the day ever arriving when everything in life makes me go kissy- kissy, the chances seem better that eventually I'll be dead and some poor realtor will have to deal with this nice little house with a nightmare in the basement. Too big to fit through the door, too heavy to lift, and impossible to dismantle. I use very serious nails, and slather the wood first with a real mean hide glue. I went at it for about twenty minutes. Bang bang bam! Then I'd hear little female footfalls on the floorboards, chatter and laughter echoing in metallic haunts down through the ductwork. Bang bang BAM! A screech, a shriek, a chair being shifted. BANGBANGBANG bam. Murmurs in stereo, than a single piercing giggle. God damndamndamn DAMN! I wound up running out of scrap wood. Though I wasn't any happier, all the tension had flowed down my arms and into my creation. I took a few steps back. Lookin' good! In the current stage it suggested a few possibilities to me. Birthday party time! I washed my hands in the little utility sink I'd managed to successfully install down there. From there I planned to go upstairs and straight out the front door, wordlessly. Take a small walk. Grab a decent bite on the way and wind up at Hed's, the only bar where all my real friends ever hang out. I knew in advance how that would turn out. If I went to Hed's with a friend or two, we'd walk in the front door to discover that everyone in the universe I knew was there. The bartender would wave at me madly and have what I wanted ready before I got to the station. The jukebox would be playing exactly every song that I wanted to hear. I'd hardly dare to put a quarter in the pinball machines, because I'd wind up playing for half an hour off the one coin. All the atoms of tiny round tables would drift together as our crowd created a brand new element. There would be several intriguing people I'd never met so thrilled to meet me as I charmed them with my wit and intelligence. Beautiful women would stand up to refresh their drinks, turning first to ask if they could get me another. When I went up alone, I would enter through the back door so I could have a clear view of everyone there. Invariably there would not be a familiar face in all the place. I would be virtually invisible to the bartender, who would be surly and forgetful. I could slip my life's savings into the jukebox and never hear a song I'd played. A game of pinball would be all three balls instantly gone through the gap between the flippers. I would remain Mr. Hydrogen, at my tiny table wherever in the room, sitting unbonded. Not only would no one talk to me, but no one would even glance my way. Between my second and third drink I would have the usual epiphany: why are you sitting drinking in a bar full of people you don't know? My standard recourse would be to have another round, deciding then to either finish up and leave or answer why not? I was about to depart on what would certainly rise to the upper reaches of the list of my most dismal birthday celebrations. Just as I was turning to leave I was caught by the last piece of wood I'd hammered on. It stood straight out, pointing at me like an index finger. The stance was almost accusatory, but really there was something so kinetic about its placement that it seemed more like a nag frozen in mid-wag. Then the whole piece spoke to me. Duh, dumb fuck, you're going in the wrong door! I nearly wept on the spot. It was the best present I'd ever received. I took the stairs in bounds, stopped in the hall to grab a coat from the rack, then composed myself for the quick waltz through the living room to the front door. I stepped in the room and froze. Janey and Sheila were basically where I'd left them. Janey had slid down the sofa a bit while Sheila was kneeling on the floor in front of her like she was tempting her with new shoes. But there weren't any shoes. The shoes were like the rest of their clothes, tossed and scattered around the room. The pair of them were absolutely naked, and Sheila's head was burrowed between Janey's wide-spread thighs. Janey gave me a glazed sort of look, a big smile slurring the words, "Happy Birthday baby, whyn't you come join the party!" Sheila looked up with a glistening face long enough to say, "We're just reliving the glory of our college days. Too bad you never visited. Janey's told me plenty about what a talented tongue you have." With that she returned to Janey's crotch, while lifting her own rump higher, widening her thighs, and exposing the inflamed parts of her treasure nest. Her hands retreated from Janey's labia to her own, spreading her lips in imitation. In a narcotic whisper Janey crooned, "Help yourself, baby, it's an open invitation." By then my nose was stuffed full with the smell of ripe pussy. I was instantly intoxicated and on the floor, scooting forward and turning on my back as I placed myself between Sheila's knees, grabbing her ass and pulling her flowering lips down towards mine. There was a golden chalice brimming with nectar, and I was thirsting for every drop. It was hard to say which movement was more frantic, my tongue licking her lips or her cunt rubbing against my mouth. I heard some muffled words from far away that sounded like Suck my clit! so I did. There was an intense groan followed by screams that I felt resounding back up from the very floor joists. That would be Janey; Sheila was still on the journey. I grabbed the cheeks of her ass with both my hands and kneaded them like plump hunks of bread dough, pulling her down, down, my tongue lashing back and forth from slit to clit. Right as I felt my reward beginning in the clenching of her thighs, a pair of hands started peeling off my clothes, the fingers lingering, tracing sexy lines on every square inch of my revealed skin. While a small hand grasped my big cock, a pretty voice whispered like a breeze through trees, "Mmm, yea, suck your sister's cunt. Doesn't her pussy taste delicious?" That it did, and then much more so as Sheila let go, screaming and creaming all over my face. Janey plunged her mouth down on my cock, taking it all the way down her throat, pulling back up to just the head, sinking down and up and down and up. I wanted to tell her to slow down but there was no way for the words to leave my mouth. Fortunately Sheila then slowly shifted around. And then there were four hands, two sets of lips and a pair of tongues lightly covering every surface of my cock. They were teasing me supremely but I didn't mind. I still had Sheila's sex nudging against my mouth. I left her clit alone to come down from its hypersensitive state. My tongue had plenty enough to occupy its time, leisurely lapping up the spill of her juice. But once they started giggling together, I lashed my tongue out, tickling and licking her clit, nibbling it with my lips, working them together to suck her off like crazy. The assault caught Sheila by surprise and she simply exploded. There was no time for grunting and moaning, she went straight off howling. I seriously thought she was going to fracture my skull. As nice a way to die as any, I supposed. She rolled off me gasping and panting. Janey looked down at me while stroking me with both hands, her eyes two big supernovas, exclaiming only, "Amazing. Fucking amazing!" I thought so. Janey rose up on her haunches, straddling me, then sank down, fucking me very, very slowly, her eyes gone to slits, a wide thin smile on her face. She leaned over and kissed me deeply as Sheila began to stir, then she lifted herself off me. Sheila moved over and gave my glistening cock several long cat licks. Janey bent down and seized each of us by an arm and announced, "Enough of the cake, let's move into the bedroom and go for the icing." They each grabbed me by the hand as we started off down the hall. I hung back a little, then Janey looked back. "Isn't that cute? He's checking us out." Flustered I muttered, "I feel like a hick in Paris. All the sights are so-o fine." I withdrew my hands and caught up, letting my hands slide down between each of their rumps. Cupping, squeezing, my middle fingers trailing up into the lushness of their labias. "I do believe I've died and gone to heaven." Sheila reached over and gave my jutting cock a squeeze. "You still feel incredibly alive to me." Janey teased, "You will wind up in heaven, but so far you've barely started on the way." They pulled down the covers then pushed me down in the middle of the bed, clambering in on either side of me and rolling my legs wide. I thought, breathlessly, that they were both going to go back to scaling old Knob Hill together again, but instead they just snuggled up against me. I had a thigh wedged between each of their thighs. Simply lying there like that felt exceptionally nice. Three mouths sharing one kiss. Then Janey raised up on her elbows and scooted up a little, with Sheila quickly following. "Look," Janey giggled, "I'd say he's in titty heaven." Well, that was an accurate assessment. There was all this soft flesh contrasted with stiff nipples rubbing against my chest and brushing across my face. I wound up with a breast in each hand while they crushed the other two together so I could get both nipples in my mouth. I added a note to my general list: buy a bigger mouth! I was going wild having two different types of breasts in my face at the same time. It was like being a little kid and discovering chocolate ice cream--it didn't usurp vanilla as a favorite flavor, instead expanding the sheer pleasure of ice cream about ten-fold. "Watch this," Janey told Sheila. "Ray just loves this. It drives him crazy." With that warning she slipped a hand between Sheila's legs, returning with fingers slick and fragrant. She smeared the cunt sauce on Sheila's nipple while Sheila reached down in imitation to double the pleasure. Whoa, shit! You can get ice cream hand- dipped or soft-serve! Crazy? Did someone say crazy? The word didn't begin to describe the way the circuits in my brain were frying. I could hear them popping and hissing. There was stinky smoke billowing out my ears! Finally Sheila moved up and around, murmuring something about wanting to get better acquainted with that big fuck stick. That was fine with me. In all the excitement I'd almost forgotten about it. No one can say I wasn't brought up right. When someone gives you a present, you tell them thank you as soon as possible. Poor Janey looked like she was a little tired, her bottom sort of sore. I pulled her up figuring my face would make for a very pleasant seat. She sat down with a big sigh. Knowing I'd be in close quarters, I exaggerated the motions of my tongue and lips. Oh, thank you, thank you thank you thank you thank you! It didn't take her long to squeal You're welcome. The whole while Sheila had my cock in her mouth. My sperm was a string of thoroughbreds anxiously waiting to run the Derby. The starting bell kept clanging away, but Sheila would never quite let the gates lift. Janey slung herself off me, then crawled over to where Sheila had rolled away on her back. Sheila had her legs bent and spread. Janey reached down with her hands and gently parted my sister's plush pink gates. I lay there watching in a stunned state. "Wake up, Ray! I think Sheila wants you to fuck her now." Sheila smiled and swiveled her hips in agreement. That was enough of a wake-up call for me. I got up and approached on all fours. It took me forever to cover the distance. The bed seemed to have lengthened to the size of a football field. There's something about the sight of a woman willing, wanting and waiting that makes time slow wa-a-ay down. Finally I reached my destination, parking my hips between her thighs. No doubt I could have slid right in without assistance from either of us, but Janey seemed to take particular delight in playing the tour guide, grabbing my cock and slowly, leisurely rubbing the head all up and down Sheila's eager parts. "Put it in, Janey," she groaned, "for godsakes, put it in!" Janey complied lovingly, ending her double tease. "You be sure to do her good," she patted my ass while putting her tongue in my ear. I always pride myself on doing it good. Pride, of course, coming as it does before the fall, I kept myself from doing it too good at first, not wanting to fall that fast. Sheila just locked down, her gaze on mine and her limbs around me. She never said a word, and made not a sound, not even when her mouth gaped open so wide her eyes were squeezed shut. An armory was exploding inside her, silently. Her entire body went totally tense, slowly melting away into complete laxity. Sheila grabbed my head and began covering my lips with nippy little kisses. "See," she panted, "I told you I planned to get laid tonight!" Dumb me and my astonished face as it dawned on me. "I was set up!" Sheila pulled out from under me, then rolled over, displaying a new angle to her charms. "Let me set you up once more." I grabbed onto her hips as she snaked a hand back to insert me inside again. Janey pulled her fingers out of her cunt long enough to scoot over for a closer look. "Oh god, Sheila, you should see how sexy this looks. So hot! His big purple cock sliding in and out of your red hot twat! Come on baby, pump her, pump her pussy, pump her pussy full of come!" Janey had her free hand on my balls practically yanking them off while Sheila's cunt clenched at my cock as she went off wilding again. I really had no choice in the matter. I picked up the pace, slapping against her ass, and started blowing a great big load. I wasn't even quite finished when Janey pulled us apart, rolled Sheila on her back, then dove straight in for the delights. Sheila stretched her arms out long towards me, "Come here and let me have a taste too!" She took my cockhead in her mouth, taking down the dwindling pulsations, and then began licking my entire shaft clean. She didn't allow me the chance to get properly soft. Once I was raging full again, she sort of batted us both away. "Now I want to watch you fuck Janey." I moved up behind Janey, grabbing onto her lovely ass as I slid my way in. Sheila came around beside me, trailing her fingers all over us. "Oh Janey, you're right, this is such a beautiful sight." Then she turned to me, "But I know a way to have an even better view." With that she slid underneath Janey into a classic sixty-nine, except that she had a cunt stuffed full of cock for her mouth to play with. We played with each other like a symphony, the movements rising and falling for what seemed like hours until the final climax, when we three crashed together, the triple crescendo rattling the window panes and sending bits of plaster scattering from off the walls. We all drew up together in the bed for a mighty cuddle, one of them having stepped up to turn out the light. "Happy birthday!" Janey and I cooed at one another, turning in unison to croon, "Birthday happy!" to Sheila. Fingers slowly stroking and toes sort of kissing sent us off to sweet sleep. When I eventually woke up, my head was buried beneath a pillow the way I usually wind up sleeping. I probably wouldn't have woken up so soon, but my morning erection had wound up in a softly sucking mouth. I lay there drifting in the luxurious feeling. No one ever quite like Janey to drive my cock crazy. I could sense that we were alone, though when Sheila had gotten up to go I couldn't tell. I do sleep very soundly. I was thinking a nice blow job would be just perfect before I had to get up to go fetch the kids. Without warning my wet cock was alone in the cool air, but then it was sunk deep in the cushy warmth that no mouth can duplicate. The pillow was stripped away from my face. But it was Sheila gazing down at me with asterisks in her eyes. "I'm so happy to have gotten back together with Janey," she whimpered, "but I'm ecstatic to have finally gotten together with you." "Where is she?" I managed to ask. She reached over to the night stand and retrieved a note. Ray, it read, I've gone to get the kids. Will stop at my folks and stay for a late-ish lunch. Fuck her good again, and again and again and again! Love, Janey. "What time is it?" I gasped. "Why, I've just sat down to breakfast," Sheila grinned. "Next is brunch, then lunch promptly at noon, which'll probably leave plenty of time for an early afternoon snack. No reason to wait for birthday parties anymore!" END Like? Yes? No? Comments welcome. losgud@hotmail.com * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * It's okay to *READ* stories about unprotected sex with others outside a monogamous relationship. But it isn't okay to *HAVE* unprotected sex with people other than a trusted partner. 4-million people around the world contract HIV every year. You only have one body per lifetime, so take good care of it! * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Kristen's collection - Directory 69