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                 K R I S T E N' S    C O L L E C T I O N
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How to Enjoy the Company of a Streetwalker
by Tongueman (tongueman276@hotmail.com)

***

A guide to the purveyors of the world's oldest 
profession. (MF, prost, oral)

***

Over the past few decades I have had the pleasure of 
enjoying the company of purveyors of the world's second 
oldest profession, in over a dozen different countries 
as well as in over one half of the states in the U.S. 
and one half of the provinces in Canada. I have spent 
quality time with escorts, call girls, massage parlor 
girls, brothel girls, bar girls, hotel hoes, and street 
walkers, but this article is devoted to the basest form 
of prostitution, the street whores.

The following is my advise gleaned from years of 
picking up and getting blown by and fucking ladies of 
the night. If you ever think that you might venture 
onto a stroll to seek companionship from a member of 
the fairer sex, then read these words of advise and 
ignore them at your peril. My only proviso is that most 
of my experience with street walkers has been in North 
America and it may or may not apply to all countries in 
other areas of the world.

I have divided my advise into three lists. First, those 
that are aimed at keeping you out of the hands of the 
local authorities. Second, those that are aimed at 
keeping you safe (both physically and financially). 
Third, those that are aimed at ensuring that you get 
the best bang for your buck.

AVOIDING COPS TIPS

There is nothing worse than going to a stroll to get 
yourself a nice tasty little piece of tail, only to end 
up spending the night in some jail cell with Bubba as 
your cell mate. Follow these suggestions to minimize 
your chances of getting busted and having to deal with 
all of the crap and embarrassment that goes with it.

1. Always drive around the stroll a few times to get 
the feel for what is going on that night. Keep your 
eyes peeled for too many cop cars circling the area and 
especially ghost cars that might indicate that there is 
an undercover police sting operation looking to bust 
unsuspecting johns (that's you). Get to know the feel 
for the stroll and when the feel changes get the hell 
out of there. No cops can be just as dangerous as too 
many cops. Be paranoid and if something doesn't seem 
right then trust your instincts and leave the area 
immediately. Remember, he who cruises and drives away, 
lives to cruise another day.

2. When you are cruising in search mode, and you see a 
lady who looks like someone who you'd enjoy busting a 
nut with, pull up near her with her on the passenger 
door side. Leave the passenger side door unlocked and 
look at her, but do not motion her over. If she's a 
whore, she'll be anxious to make some cash and she will 
open the door and get in. If she is an undercover cop, 
she will probably wait for you to clearly invite her 
over, because she needs you to initiate the contact or 
you can cry "entrapment".

3. Once she has come over and opened your door she will 
probably jump right in but if she doesn't, invite her 
in. Ask her if she needs a ride or something. An 
undercover cop will usually NOT get into your car. Bad 
things can happen to undercover female cops getting 
into a john's car, so they usually will not do it. Cops 
will usually try and get you to negotiate with them, 
with them standing at the window, but do not do that 
under any circumstances. If she doesn't get in the car, 
drive away and don't look back, and remember this, 
NEVER discuss sex for money with a chick who won't sit 
in your vehicle!

4. Avoid hookers who are working in pairs. Undercover 
cops usually work in pairs on the stroll for their own 
safety. They also have back-up nearby (usually ghost 
cars). Hookers working alone are usually fairly 
plentiful and they are always your best option. If you 
see one that you know you just have to pound and she is 
with another hoe, keep an eye on them and if her friend 
goes off with someone else, then you're in like Flynn. 
If neither of them get into a car then that might be a 
good sign that they are trouble, so get away from them.

5. If your whore initiates the squeeze test, then go 
for it. For some reason, a lot of whores seem to think 
that if you are an undercover cop, you will not squeeze 
their tits. If they ask you to do it, then go for it. I 
like to reach inside their top and play with the nipple 
a bit. Besides being fun, I doubt very much that an 
undercover cop would invite and allow guys to tweak her 
nipples, so if you have done that, things are looking 
pretty good for you.

6. Don't initiate a discussion of money for sex with 
them. In many jurisdictions, prostitution is legal, but 
talking about it in public (and yes, your car is 
public) is illegal. Once she is in the car, make sure 
that she brings up the topic. Whatever you do, avoid 
the urge to ask that age old question, "how much for a 
blowjob?" Usually, she will ask you what you are 
looking for. Put the ball back in her court by saying 
something like, "I don't know, what are you offering?" 

She will usually quote off her wish price list at that 
time, but occasionally the two of you will get into a 
cat and mouse game of who is going to bring it up 
first. She may be a smart one who is protecting herself 
in case you are a cop, or she just might be a cop 
herself. If she is a cop, she needs you to ask how much 
for sex or to offer money for sex. 

Once you have done that, she has got you by the short 
and curlies and you're going to be in for a shitty and 
embarrassing time.  She can't bring it up first though, 
or once again you can cry "entrapment". If she isn't 
bringing it up, be paranoid and end the game and drop 
her off that the next corner. There are plenty more 
fish in the sea, no point in risking your good name and 
reputation on her!

7. If you are really paranoid, put a tape recorder in 
the car. Just in case you have picked up an undercover 
cop, and she says that you said something that you did 
not, this could save you. Unfortunately, many cops are 
not beyond fudging about what someone said or did in 
order to get a conviction, so the tape recorder could 
be your proof of exactly what was said and what wasn't 
said.

SAFETY TIPS

Keeping yourself physically safe and keeping your 
wallet intact are both crucial to you having a good 
experience when you take a trip to the stroll so heed 
these words of advise.

1. Don't cruise the stroll when you have had too much 
to drink. I know that when you are loaded you tend to 
throw caution to the wind and all you can think of is 
finding some young, tight cunt to pound the shit out 
of, but avoid the temptation of driving to the stroll. 
If you're loaded, you might ignore my advise above and 
get busted for picking up an undercover pig that you 
thought would be sucking on your pole. You might get 
busted for drunk driving - cops know that pissed up 
guys go to the stroll so they are watching it pretty 
carefully. It is also much easier for a hoe to take 
advantage of you when you are loaded. If you're tanked 
up and you've got a raging hard on that jerking off 
won't handle, fork over the cash and get yourself a 
call girl or an escort to fuck in the comfort of your 
own home and stay safe!

2. Stay as far away as possible from whores who are 
acting weird. If they are nuts or whacked out on crack, 
then they will be very unpredictable and they will 
probably be trouble. Stay away from the dirty and slimy 
looking ones for obvious medical concerns. Avoid them 
and stay safe!

3. Don't let a whore smoke up in your car or have you 
drive them to a crack house to get them hooked up 
before they service you. Stay away from the drugs! Most 
hoes are on drugs. They are standing on a street corner 
hoping that some strange guy will pick them up and 
shove his cock into their mouth, cunt or asshole, so 
that they can make $20 to buy some more crack. Drugs 
are their problem, not yours, so stay away from them. 
The last thing you need is to have the cops pull you 
over for a spot check and the whore you picked up is 
smoking up or whacked out on crack.

4. Don't drive where she wants you to drive. She may be 
taking you to some secluded location where some of her 
friends are waiting to roll you, or worse! She might be 
taking you to a spot where she is planning on taking 
off out of your car with your cold hard cash in her 
jeans and your load still in yours. 

Sometimes they might freak out if you drive somewhere 
else. In that case, try and talk them into it, but if 
they won't budge, drop them off. I fell for this one a 
couple of times where I drove to a location of the 
whore's choosing and after I'd given her the cash and 
had my pant down around my ankles she says, "see ya 
later" and bolts out the door. That sucks.

5. Park somewhere away from the stroll and then start 
pounding her. Remember just because you are chilling in 
your car getting your rocks off inside some babe's 
mouth doesn't necessarily mean that you are doing 
anything illegal. As far as any passers-by are 
concerned, you are just ending off or starting out a 
great date. Don't be too obvious, but make sure that 
you relax a little and enjoy the finer things in life.

6. Have an escape route planned out in your head. 
John's can have bad dates too. Usually this happens 
when you don't want to do anything with a hoe and you 
want to drop her off and the bitch says she's not 
getting out until you pay her. You can usually avoid 
these cunts by staying away from the weird looking ones 
but just in case you get unlucky, know where to go and 
what to do if it goes bad. 

I would suggest a well lit gas station or store parking 
lot. Drive there, leave the car, and go inside. 
Hopefully she'll get the hint and piss off.  If worse 
comes to worse you may have to call the cops, but try 
everything else first. Eventually they will usually 
give up but it makes for a shitty experience. I had one 
hoe who was strung out and I have no idea why I let her 
into my truck. 

She wouldn't leave without cash and she went nuts and 
pulled out a knife and threatened to stick me if I 
didn't give her $30. I stayed calm and pulled into a 
gas station and got out of the car. She stayed in the 
car and refused to get out. I finally coaxed her out 
for $5 and got the hell out of there. Crack hoes can be 
dangerous because they will do whatever it takes to get 
enough cash for their next fix, so steer clear of them!

7. Hide your valuables and anything that can identify 
you. If things go badly, you don't want her grabbing 
your cell phone or your car registration papers and 
holding them hostage until you fork over some of your 
cold hard cash. I've had them look through the glove 
box and then give up when they don't find anything 
worth taking.

8. Decide how much money you are prepared to spend on 
your whore and hide the rest of your stash. If a hoe 
spots a wad of cash, she will do anything to get her 
mitts on it, that is just how they are. Hide it under a 
seat or in your trunk. Don't put it in your coat 
pocket. In my younger, dumber days, I had a hoe deep-
throating me until me eyes were bulging out of me head. 
She had my cock in her throat and she was licking my 
balls at the same time. 

I blew my load straight down her throat and she licked 
me clean. It was one of the best BJ's I've ever had. 
The problem was, that after she left I discovered that 
she had pick-pocketed my wallet out of my jacket 
pocket, emptied it of $140 and dropped it in the back 
of the car, all while she was gagging on my cock. She 
was talented, but it was a pricey blowjob!

9. Don't pay until you have arrived at your spot and 
are getting ready to do the nasty. By then you are away 
from the stroll and her chances of taking your cash and 
splitting are lower.

10. Dress down. If you show up on the stroll in your 
Armani suit and driving your BMW convertible you are 
putting yourself in a pretty tough bargaining position. 
The hoe knows you have cash and that $20 blow job that 
the construction worker in the Volkswagen just got 
before you showed up, is going to cost you $100.

11. Never pay the sticker price. When a hooker tells 
you what the costs are, she is giving you her wish 
list. Don't be a sucker. Typically the prices that she 
quotes first off are usually 2 to 3 times what she'll 
actually take. Don't be afraid of insulting her with a 
lowball offer, remember, she's a whore. My personal 
record is this Mexican hoe in Sacramento who blew me 
for $5 and a ride home!

12. Use protection. Never ever fuck a whore without 
wrapping your rod. Do not let your cock go inside a 
pussy or an asshole without making damn sure that it is 
well protected. The local health authorities will 
disagree with me, but I don't use a condom for 
blowjobs. I just can't stand them and I have never had 
a problem catching something from a whore's mouth. 

I understand the concept that she may still have cum in 
her mouth from some guy who she blew before you picked 
her up, and he might have had something but I really 
think that the chances of catching anything from oral 
sex is very low. Any health professionals who want to 
tell me otherwise, I invite your comments.

HOW TO HAVE FUN TIPS

1. Use the dick twitch test. When you are cruising 
around, a girl has to turn you on or you are just 
wasting your time. When you pull up to her, if your 
heart doesn't beat a little faster, or your dick 
doesn't twitch, keep going and look for another one. Be 
picky and don't settle for less than what you wanted 
when you started out, you will probably end up wishing 
you had kept your money and gone home to spank your 
monkey. I've had hoes suck my cock for what seemed like 
hours and I would have been way better off watching a 
porno and flonging my dong at home, so be selective!

2. Avoid hardened whores and look for the part timers. 
Hardened whores are usually a waste of money. All they 
want is for you to shoot your load as fast as you can 
so that they can move on to the next poor john to do 
the same thing. For them it is all business and no fun. 

Most of my great and memorable experiences with hookers 
have involved part timers. They are housewives or 
single moms who have jobs but hit the stroll every once 
in awhile for a thrill or to supplement their income. 
They are a great find and if you get one of them, count 
yourself lucky! As long as you treat them ok, they will 
treat you more like a date than a john. 

I remember one I had once who was about 22 years old 
and she looked good. I found her at around 5:00 p.m. 
and she was going out clubbing that night with her 
girlfriend and needed some cash. I paid that babe $40 
and she sucked my knob for over 1/2 an hour. She was 
hot and after about 10 minutes I was ready to blow but 
she toyed with me for another 20 minutes bringing me to 
the edge and then easing off just before I would cum. 

When I finally did lose it, I thought for sure I'd blow 
the back of her head off. She had fun doing it and 
really liked the fact that I was having a great time 
too, which is something that you just don't get from 
the hardened hoes.

3. When you see a fresh looking one, pick her up fast. 
Remember the adage, "he who hesitates is lost" or "if 
you snooze you lose". You are not the only one cruising 
the stroll in search for a great piece of ass. The 
fresh meat who hasn't got that hardened look to her is 
rare to find and she won't last long. If you do a drive 
by and then drive around the block to pick her up, it 
will probably be too late because some other bastard 
will beat you to her. Then, you get to drive around for 
the next 1/2 hour dreaming about the one that got away, 
while some lucky son of a bitch is tooling his cock in 
and out of her soft, juicy pussy, and it should have 
been you!

4. Carry a tube of lube with you. Even if you are only 
looking for a blowjob, you just never know what might 
present itself to you, so be prepared. I remember once 
I paid this chick $20 to blow me. She was 30ish with 
blond straight hair, a little chunky because she'd had 
two kids, but she had a little girl face that I knew 
would look great when my cock was in her mouth. You 
know what they say, how do you make a cute girl 
beautiful? Put your cock in her mouth. 

Anyway, I had a truck with a bench seat and I sat back 
and stretched out while she started sliding her tongue 
up and down my shaft. I played with her tits while she 
blew me and then I started to finger her pussy. The 
next thing you know her head was bobbing up and down in 
my lap and I had a finger sliding in and out of her 
asshole. 

I forked over another $20 and she was on her knees with 
her face pushed up against the side window while a 
fucked the shit out of her asshole with the aid of a 
condom and some handy dandy lube. She was squealing 
like a banshee and when I came I rammed my cock all the 
way up her poop chute and let go. It was great but I 
did feel a little bad when she walked gingerly away 
after I dropped her off at her corner! Oh well, it was 
one of the best $40 I ever spent but it would not have 
been possible if I hadn't had the lube tube with me.

5. Treat your whore with respect until you're inside 
her then call her whatever you want. Be nice to the 
lady and it will probably pay off for you. Once you are 
pounding her though, if you feel the need to yell out 
"take this you fucking whore" or something to that 
effect before you shoot your load, go for it. Remember, 
you have paid for the experience, so make sure you get 
the most pleasure out of it that you possibly can.

6. If you luck out and get a fresh piece of ass who 
treats you like a king, don't be afraid to tip her. 
They are rare so don't let them get away. See if they 
will give a cell phone number so that you can nail them 
a few more times without having to be in the right 
place at the right time. You'll tire of them eventually 
but until then, happy humping!

7. Don't be afraid to ask your hoe to do things that 
you wouldn't ask your girlfriend or wife to do. If your 
wife would never dream of letting you ram your cock up 
her ass, then don't be afraid to ask some neighborhood 
whore to spread her ass cheeks and take a trip up the 
Hershey Highway. 

If your girlfriend won't swallow your load because she 
says it tastes gross, then tip your hoe an extra $10 to 
swallow your seed. If you always wanted to shoot your 
wad into a girl's eye then tell your hooker that that's 
what you want. If you want to film the action then tell 
her that. 

Hey with cameras as small as they are nowadays, you 
could even secretly record the action for your future 
viewing pleasure. Whores are there for your pleasure, 
so don't be shy! 

8. Respect the local residents. Most strolls tend to be 
in residential areas and often they are in lower class 
neighborhoods. This means that some of the women 
walking down the street may just be getting off the 
late shift and they do not deserve to be bothered by a 
bunch of horny guys cruising around the streets. 

Be careful, that fresh piece of ass that has your heart 
pumping and your dick twitching might not be for sale 
and she doesn't need to be harassed by you. This also 
means that after you've fucked the shit out of your 
rented fuck toy, when you lean back with that 
satisfied, dopey looking grin on your face and you peel 
off the rubber, don't throw it out the window, and find 
a garbage can somewhere. Remember, you are probably in 
someone else's neighborhood and their kids don't need 
to be playing with your used condom the next morning.

9. Don't mistake a whore for a lover. If you get a 
regular hoe who you are calling up and pounding on a 
regular basis, whatever you do, don't start thinking of 
her as your girlfriend. She might be a nice person and 
you might really enjoy fucking the shit out of her, but 
always remember as your cock is sliding in and out of 
her warm, wet mouth, that part of that moisture might 
be from the other guy that she sucked off 20 minutes 
before you showed up. She's a fucking whore, and always 
keep that in perspective.

Men fucking women in exchange for payment has been 
going on since the dawn of time and it will continue to 
go on as long as men and women inhabit the same planet. 
To a certain extent, all women are whores and all men 
are johns. Women let you fuck them once you've paid 
them something. It might be dinner and a movie. It 
might be sweet talk and a few drinks. It might be a 
trip to Mexico. It might be a wedding ring or, it might 
be $20 to some chick standing under a streetlight on 
the wrong side of the tracks. 

In a way, prostitutes are more honest about how they 
are using sex to get something that they want. Almost 
all women do it, for most though, it is just more 
disguised and hidden. For men, paying a prostitute to 
get them off can be exciting and easy. There is no 
emotional attachment and they can just pound away at a 
rented cunt like they are masturbating in it and it can 
be cheaper than taking a date out to dinner and a movie 
and hoping that she will give it up. It is as close to 
a sure thing as you can get.

Good luck gentlemen, and happy humping!

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
It's okay to *READ* stories about unprotected sex with
others outside a monogamous relationship. But it isn't
okay to *HAVE* unprotected sex with people other than
a trusted partner. You only have one body per lifetime,
so take good care of it!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Kristen's collection - Directory 37