The July 2006 through December 2006 Silver Clitorides Awards


The Presentation

La Taverna was lit up like a....

No no no, that's the Golden Clitorides Awards.

It was a dark and stormy night...

Too cliche.

Souvie had hired the Rockettes to...

Not believable.

Because of the dark and stormy night, a lightning storm had fried the computer, causing all the votes...

Too cruel.

I was running out of inspiration. Oh, who was I kidding, I didn't have any inspiration to run out of.

"Souvie, what are you doing?"

I jumped because I hadn't heard John come up behind me. "Working on the Silver Clitorides Awards presentation."

"Still?"

"Yes, still," I said defensively. "I'll be through in a minute."

"You said that over an hour ago." John twirled my chair around and pulled me out of it. Before I could protest, he'd taken over my nice, warm computer chair.

"What are you doing?!"

"I've been upstairs waiting in our bedroom. I've got romantic candlelight and a bowl full of fresh strawberries. I've got the covers turned down, and the heat turned up." He threw up his hands. "I've got everything but you!"

I sighed. "I said, just--"

"Yes, just a few minutes, I know," he finished for me. "Let me make this easy for you." His hands flew across the keyboard.

"Just tell everyone that Wynter & Cinnamon by Russell Hoisington won the SC award for July, April Showers by Russell Hoisington won the award for August, The Trailer Park: The Third Year by Wizard was the September winner, and Axe Victim by Lellan McLemore won for October. The November award goes to Nieces by The Old Guy and there's a tie between Homework by Russell Hoisington and Looking Through the Lens by Ryan Sylander for December."

He sat back and stared at his handiwork while I stared at him in shock. "My presentation!" I wailed.

"You'll get over it," he said, getting to his feet and dragging me up the stairs.

P.S.
And a thank you to all of the nominees and to all those of you who voted.

'Man-in-the-Boat'
Nominatee BannerFinalist Banner
Month Story Author Status
JULY 2006 Playing Doctor Wine Maker Finalist
JULY 2006 The Trailer Park: The Second Year Wizard Finalist
JULY 2006 Wynter & Cinnamon Russell Hoisington Winner
AUGUST 2006 April Showers Russell Hoisington Winner
AUGUST 2006 My Little Sister Tammikinz Finalist
SEPTEMBER 2006 11th Grade Openbook Finalist
SEPTEMBER 2006 Passing Glances RedHairedandFriendly Finalist
SEPTEMBER 2006 The Trailer Park: The Third Year Wizard Winner
OCTOBER 2006 A Prickly Situation Russell Hoisington Finalist
OCTOBER 2006 Axe Victim Lellan McLemore Winner
OCTOBER 2006 Bob and Sally Lived on Elm Street Will Somers Finalist
OCTOBER 2006 Honorable Infidelity Wine Maker Finalist
OCTOBER 2006 Melanie: The Caretaker gapster7 Finalist
OCTOBER 2006 Now This Won't Hurt a Bit A Strange Geek Finalist
OCTOBER 2006 The Idol Made Me Do It Joe J. and Wet Dream-Girl Finalist
OCTOBER 2006 The Trailer Park: The Fourth Year Wizard Finalist
NOVEMBER 2006 Deep Inside Michelle gapster7 Finalist
NOVEMBER 2006 Karma Wine Maker Finalist
NOVEMBER 2006 Nieces The Old Guy Winner
NOVEMBER 2006 The Fat Lady Sings Souvie Finalist
DECEMBER 2006 Homework Russell Hoisington Winner
DECEMBER 2006 Looking Through the Lens Ryan Sylander Finalist
DECEMBER 2006 The Snow Globe Aquillae Finalist
A pale yellow background indicates a winning story.
A varied blue background indicates nominees and finalists.