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 E-mail address: tradesjackofall@hotmail.com

 Copyright 1999 by Jack of all Trades



  Aieeee2K (MF Rom Mast)



 This all started from reading those Y2K stories on ASS.
 Everyone was celebrating the dawning of the new millennium
 with some sort of hot sexual adventure with the exception
 of John A whose experience was a tad deflating. I knew I
 wanted to spend my evening snuggled with my wife engaging
 in carnal pleasures. It seemed the perfect way to welcome
 a new millennium. I couldn't wait to tell her of our plans
 when I got home from the office.

 I thought about all the things that I wanted to do with her
 on New Year's eve as I drove home. I figured we could start
 about 11PM since the kids would have been put to bed at 9
 and two hours ought to be sufficient time for them to fall
 asleep and not be awakened by our activities. I would heat
 up some lotion and start with a thorough back and neck
 massage, something she loves to have done to her. I could
 picture myself rubbing and massaging her shoulders, working
 the lotion into her smooth creamy skin. Working my way down
 a bit lower, forcing the tension out of her back muscles,
 tracing her ribs with my fingers but careful to avoid her
 ticklish spots; then to the small of her back, rubbing and
 squeezing, feeling her relax to my touch. I would skip over
 her ass and start on her legs, kneading her hamstrings,
 occasionally allowing my hands to travel to her inner thighs
 to tease her a bit; then down to the calves.

 By this time I would be able to smell her arousal, a small
 reward for a job well done. The big reward was coming next
 though as I ran my hands up her legs and started on her
 lovely ass. I loved to work her cheeks with my fingers,
 squeezing the firm flesh, feeling the heat from her crack.
 I would work the lotion into the cleft, running my fingers
 lightly through the crack just brushing her anus at first.
 My fingers delved deeper to circle her rose, inserting just
 the tip of my finger and gently working it in a circular
 motion. After twenty or so minutes of enjoying the feel of
 her in my hands I would roll her over and apply my skills
 to her front starting with her wonderful legs and working
 my way up to her perfect breasts.

 When I get her breasts lubed up with the lotion it feels
 like they just pour through my hands. I would gently
 squeeze and tease her nipples. I could almost hear her
 moans as I daydreamed about this perfect night. I had to
 interrupt my fantasy though and adjust myself in my pants
 since I was now outside the school and had to pick up my
 son.

 "Man I can't wait for that little fantasy to come true," I
 thought to myself as I entered the school and signed my
 son out.

 Jason never has anything together when I come to pick him
 up. He has to be the most disorganized child in the school.
 His book bag is in one corner, his coat in another and he
 and his friends are drawing or playing a game somewhere
 else. Usually whatever game they are playing involves many
 small pieces that are invariably scattered across the table
 and on the floor and I have to wait for him to get himself
 together so we can go home.

 I usually talk to the after-school care supervisor while I
 wait but today she was discussing her New Years plans with
 one of her helpers. I eavesdropped while waiting for my son.

 "Jimmy got us tickets to the bash at the Sheraton and a room
 for later," I overheard. "They have prime rib, shrimp, crab
 and a whole bunch of other fancy food. Then we dance until
 the big countdown, drink champagne, then I'm dragging his
 butt up to the room and I figure we'll get to sleep about 4."

 This was accompanied by giggles from her helpers. Apparently
 ASS writers aren't the only ones planning on hot New Years
 celebrations.

 Jason was ready. "See you all," I called out as we went out
 the door. We climbed into the Jeep and I backed out of my
 parking spot. I looked at my son. "What happened in school
 today?" I asked.

 "Nothing," he replied.

 I snickered. My son is now in the fourth grade. If his
 responses are any indication I now know why everyone bemoans
 the current state of education. "You learned nothing today?"
 I asked. "What did you do in math?"

 Jason sighed. He knew I would keep pressing until I found
 out what he did learn that day. "We started on long division,
 we're still working on our solar system projects in science,
 and I have a new story to read for language arts."

 "So you did learn something," I chuckled.

 "Yeah, I guess," he said.

 I turned into our development. I reached over and grabbed
 his side tickling him as I drove. He squirmed and giggled.
 We reached the house, pulled into the garage, and parked
 the car. Jason beat me to the door and went inside as I
 pressed the button to lower the garage door. As I entered
 the house Jason's coat was laying in the foyer with his
 book bag. "Jason, your coat and book bag don't belong on the
 floor, hang them up!" I shouted.

 "Hi, dear," I said as I entered the kitchen and gave my
 wife a kiss. "How was your day?"

 "Busy, frustrating and disappointing," she said.

 "Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!" my four-year old shouted as she
 ran to me and wrapped herself around my legs. I picked
 her up and gave her the bear hug she was waiting for.

 "The same old same old," I replied to my wife.

 She laughed. "Yeah."

 She went back to preparing dinner as I went upstairs to
 our bedroom to change out of my suit and into jeans. By
 the time I got back downstairs the kids had the TV on and
 were watching Nickelodeon. I picked up a book and read
 until Lisa told us it was time for dinner. We ate, I did
 the dishes, which means I loaded the dishwasher, helped
 Jason with his homework, and then it was time for baths.

 Lisa gave Bree a bath and then Jason took care of himself.
 Another hour of Nickelodeon and it was time to put the
 children to bed.

 After reading their story and tucking them into bed it was
 finally time when the two of us could talk.

 "Lisa, sweetie, instead of going out this New Years why
 don't we stay home and celebrate together in bed? I have
 some wicked plans for that body of yours."

 "Honey, don't you ever listen to me?" she said with an
 exasperated sigh. "I told you last week that I had to work
 New Years because of the Y2K thing."

 Lisa is Director of Nursing in a local nursing home. As
 part of management they are required to be on hand New Years
 Eve in case any problems crop up. Nobody expects anything
 to go wrong but they have to be there just the same. "Oh
 yeah," I mumbled. Talk about your cold, wet blankets. One
 good old fantasy shot to hell. "Well it won't be the same
 as actually ringing in the New Year, but when you get home
 I still will have plans for you."

 We talked some more, watched TV, then I went upstairs to
 my office to check out the latest postings to ASS, while
 Lisa went to bed.

 I was feeling pretty sorry for myself as I read the great
 things others would be doing with their partners that I
 wouldn't get to do. Cripes practically everyone I knew was
 going to be getting some when the clock struck twelve or
 a short time thereafter. We would be lucky if Earth's orbit
 wasn't affected from all the mattress pounding that was
 going to be taking place. "Now that would be a neat sci-fi
 idea for a story," I thought to myself as I shut the
 computer down.

 Well with my plans shot out of the water I kind of moped
 about as the big day approached. New Years Eve found Lisa
 and I putting the kids to bed at 9. We went back downstairs;
 Lisa grabbed her purse and then gave me a big kiss. "I don't
 expect anything to happen, so I should be back home by one.
 I expect big things from you when I get here," she said as
 she squeezed my crotch. "Love ya."

 "Love you, too." Hmm, things were looking better. I went
 upstairs into my office and opened up the newsbrowser. I
 was reading stories when the phone rang at 11:45.

 "Hello."

 "Hi sweetie, been in the bedroom yet?"

 "No."

 "Well go check it out, I left you a surprise." Click.

 I logged off hurriedly in mid-story and went to the bedroom.
 There on my pillow was the remote to the TV and a note.

 "Sweetheart, I didn't want you to miss out on your fantasy.
 Since I couldn't be there I thought this would be the next
 best thing. Get naked, lie down, and turn on the VCR."

 I hurriedly stripped myself, turned down the covers and got
 into bed. Lisa must have sprayed the covers and pillows with
 her perfume. The wonderful smell surrounded me. I turned
 the TV on and pressed the play button on the remote. My
 jaw fell to my chest, as there in all her glory was my nude
 wife. Her skin glistened from the oil she had rubbed into
 her body. Her fingers wire circling her nipples, teasing
 them to erection. "Hi sweetie," she said. "Sorry I can't
 be there, but this should be pretty good." She was pulling
 on her nipples now. "Just a few ground rules before we
 start. Don't cum until I tell you, keep teasing yourself
 but don't you dare cum. When I tell you to call me, you
 better had. I want to hear you cum myself."

 I groaned. I was halfway there just watching her and I
 hadn't even touched myself yet.

 "Now honey there is some oil there on your nightstand. I
 want you to oil that cock of yours up. Get it nice and
 slippery." My wife was kneading her breasts now, I swear
 I could hear her purring. I grabbed the oil and squirted
 it into my palm. I got myself oiled up and let my hand
 slowly slide up and down my cock as I watched my wife.

 Her right hand left her breast and slid down her stomach
 to her pubic hair. She moaned softly. "Oh this feels so
 good baby, I wish it were your hands doing this for me."
 My cock jumped.

 My wife moans occasionally but she never talks during sex.
 I was certain there was no way that I would make it to the
 end of the tape before I came if she kept this up. Her hand
 trailed across her mound and lightly teased at her thighs.
 Her left hand alternated from tit to tit as she tugged and
 pulled at her nipples.

 She pulled her knees up and dropped them to the side,
 exposing her pussy to me. I could see her secretions on
 the lips as her finger just lightly circled them. "Oh baby,
 I wish this was your tongue," she moaned. Her hips were
 making little circles as her finger pressed a little harder
 and traced the lips. "Oh baby, Oh this is so good!" Her
 finger parted her lips and I watched mesmerized as it
 slowly sank into her depths. I had to remove my hand from
 my cock to keep myself from creaming right there.

 She added a second finger and I could see her rubbing her
 clit with her thumb as her groans and moans grew in
 intensity. I couldn't touch myself; just watching her was
 keeping me on the edge. Her left hand stretched her tit
 toward her mouth and her tongue snaked out to lick at the
 nipple. I moaned as I felt my cock lurch again.

 "Oh baby, I'm so hot. Are you ready to cum yet?" she asked.
 I felt my head nodding in agreement. "Ok baby pick up the
 phone and call me."

 I grabbed the phone and hit the speed dial for Lisa's
 office number.

 "Hello, Pinewood Nursing Home, this is Lisa speaking." She
 giggled as I groaned a hello into the phone. "Like my
 surprise?" she asked. 

 "Y-y-yes," I managed to stutter. On the TV she had added
 a third finger to her pussy, slowly pumping them in and
 out. Her groans were loud enough for Lisa to hear over
 the phone.

 "Sounds like I'm having a good time," she giggled. "Have
 you cum yet?"

 "N-n-n-no"

 "You want to?'

 "God, yes!" I gasped.

 "I think we are getting to that part," she giggled.

 On screen Lisa was moaning to beat the band, her fingers
 pumping faster and faster. Her thumb was flicking from side
 to side over her clit. Her left hand mauled at her breast.
 "Baby its time, I'm ready to cum for you. I'm going to
 count down from 10 and I want you to come with me," Lisa
 panted on screen.

 "Yep!" she laughed into my ear.

 "10"

 My hand returned to my cock and I started stroking in
 earnest. I held myself back. On screen Lisa's hips were
 pumping as her fingers made wet smacking noises going in
 and out of her pussy.

 "9"

 Lisa's voice in the phone echoed the screen as she counted
 down. I could feel my balls tightening for the impending
 explosion.

 "8"

 Both Lisas said it together. Her left hand left her breast
 and trailed down her side. I could hear Lisa giggling in
 the phone at my moans.

 "7"

 She pulled her feet back under her and arched her back.

 "6"

 I think I'm gonna make it but it's going to be close. I
 will myself to hold on.

 "5"

 Lisa's left hand snakes down and parts her cheeks. I moan
 as I realize what she is about to do.

 "4"

 Lisa's moans are getting louder. Her finger circles her
 anus.

 "3"

 I couldn't stop it now if I wanted to. Lisa's finger starts
 to slowly disappear into her ass. She is pumping her fingers
 in and out furiously as her hips rise and fall to meet them.

 "2"

 I can feel my semen start its journey as I fight to hold
 back for the finish. Lisa giggles into my ear as I moan
 my desire.

 "1"

 I can see Lisa flush on screen as her orgasm approaches.
 I squeeze harder trying to hold back as long as possible.
 Lisa's finger is buried in her ass. A voice says
 breathlessly in my ear "Cum for me ba..." Click.

 The TV goes off, the lights go out as I feel my semen
 spurting on my chest and stomach. "Shit!" I moan into the
 darkness.

 Jack of All Trades

 E-mail:  tradesjackofall@hotmail.com