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New U
Ch. 8: Gross Adjustments-What happened while you weren't looking
By Jeff Rose


[Harry: Shortly after being picked up by Michael]

"It can happen to you
It can happen to me
It can happen to everyone eventually"

- It Can Happen
(Squire/Anderson/Rabin)


"Well, what do you think of the facilities, Mr Selznick?"

Harry studied his "assistant" carefully while thinking about his response
to Dr. Hanson's query. During his entire orientation, David had been at
his
elbow from the time Michael and Leonard dropped him off at Biomech's
compound outside Ft. Meade in southern Maryland. He'd helped Harry settle
into the quarters provided him and walked him through the physical with
its
various inoculations.

Harry had been tempted briefly to slap away David's helping hands when
dressing in the disposable jumpsuit provided him, but although David was
certainly smaller than Leonard, the strength of his grip and the speed
with
which he "guided" him made Harry acutely aware that however well trained
David was as a lab tech, he was at least as well trained to keep Harry in
line.

"Biomech seems very well equipped to tackle nanite design and
construction.
I think I can have your boys up and running within a month." Harry paused
to phrase a question and stepped out into the corridor. "David, I thought
Biomech had been working on similar Nanite Construction techniques to New
U, but this place has so many containment doors and the decon procedures.
..."

A female voice jumped in."Well in the good old days of the cold war our
primary thrust was bio and chemical warfare research.", The woman in
extended her hand. "Dr. Lauren Hanson. I'm the Administrator and Head of
Bio-Chem Research."

"So your nanites started out as a biological weapon?"

"The man who built the bug that is the basis of our system was actually
trying to find a means of controlling outbreak while minimizing loss of
contractibility."

"Send that by me again?", Harry blinked as they stepped out into the
hallway.

What he created was TRS80." Dr. Hanson adjusted her glasses as David and
Harry stepped out of the changing room, and began down the hall. "I'd like
you to see why we were so interested in New U Nanotech's approach to
bio-manipulation."

"You see, TRS80 was developed before the concept of nano-machines had even
been broached. The idea was to create a bacteria that would maintain a
symbiotic relationship with a tailored virus.", She said, handing him a
folder containing the project information.

"Understand, a properly tailored virus can be devastating to any target
organism, killing in less than 24-48 hours. And for BW purposes they have
the added advantage of being incurable.", she continued, "Even if the
theoretical 'enemy' creates a vaccine, it will only help non-infected
assets. A victim either develops adequate anti-bodies and overpowers the
infection or not. That's why the outbreaks of Ebola and other more
primitive "killer" viruses burn out so quickly today. Modern medical
containment procedures seal off the infected before they can infect
others.
Since these viruses are unable to exist outside a host organism or a
controlled environment for more than, say between a couple of minutes to
an
hour, there's quickly no place to go to and the epidemic ends."

"That's also why AIDS and other more sophisticated viruses are so
difficult
to wipe out. They kill much more slowly, over a matter of years. And the
host is relatively healthy for much of that time. That gives them much
more
time to pass the infection on. Not to mention the fact Unless you like the
idea of concentration camps for all such victims like Castro is supposed
to
be using, accidents happen. Without a vaccine or real cure, it just keeps
chugging along. Just thank God both Ebola and AIDS are both still too
primitive to exist outside their host organisms for any real length of
time. If they were capable of aerosol transmission..." Dr Hanson shook her
head in awe a the thought.

"Bacteria on the other hand; While they can be treated with antibiotics,
sulfa or other toxins, curing the infected individual, containment of a
bacterial outbreak can be much more problematic. Typically bacteria can
survive for extended periods outside a host organism or even go dormant
until they encounter a favorable environment unless some form of
sterilization is performed. "

"Battling a bacterial outbreak requires finding the source of the epidemic
and sterilizing it. as well as all the normal contact tracing. Ah, here we
are.", She finished, sliding her ID through reader by the door. The room
was long, thin and crammed with a huge amount of recording equipment.
Another tech sat at the right wall, which was occupied by an immense
picture window, looking out on a large enclosed and skylighted kennel
area.
none of the animals were in evidence though. That wasn't too surprising as
about ten feet away from the six pens, were the remains of what must have
been a very impressive indoor park.

As Harry looked into various monitors, displaying various areas of the
huge
enclosure, He asked, "So what you wanted was the survivability of a
bacteria merged with the destructive capabilities of a very primitive
virus?"

"Exactly. What they developed was a fairly harmless bacteria that acted as
a carrier for whatever viral type might be preferred. As long as the virus
was made up of a longer DNA or RNA chain than the bacteria; That's all a
virus is. Anyway, for a virus to operate, once it has penetrated a cell
membrane, it plugs into the existing DNA or RNA and uses the cell's
reproducing capabilities for itself. With TRS80, the virus is dormant, but
protected by the bacterial component. , She said, becoming excited.

"But, when the bacteria finds itself in favorable conditions, how does the
virus duplicate much less enter the host?" Harry asked. Staring at one of
the monitors. He thought he saw movement in one of the bushes.

"For a brief period during the Bacteria's reproduction cycle, the DNA or
RNA strands are long enough for the virus to plug in. This prolongs the
process and the stress inevitably kills one of the developing cells. The
cell membrane ruptures temporarily. spilling the new virus into the
environment. The old virus, deprived of a place to plug into goes dormant
til the process repeats or the original bacteria wears out. The bacterial
aspect is quite benign"

"How does TRS80 relate to the New U process?"

"Take a look at the project objectives in the folder. We've got another
ten
minutes or so before feeding time."

Harry let his eyes come off the monitor. He'd caught a glimpse of
something, but doubtless he'd get a better look at feeding time. "Let's
see...You tried replacing the viral component with something similar to
New
U' S-XII "Groomer" nanites." He continued paging through Biomech's
progress. "But this will only..."

"Call it planned obsolescence.", Lauren replied. "Repeated exposure must
be
maintained on a constant basis. The Rebus virus in the TRS80 tends to
mutate rapidly, losing it's beneficial effects."

"But it works?"

"David? Why don't you help Jeremy here with feeding." David shuddered
visibly, displaying something other than his normal coolness for the first
time since Harry had met him. "Harry and I will be fine right here. Oh,
and
be careful around Marion. I understand she's gotten rather snippy since
dropping her latest litter." David nodded to Dr. Hanson and followed the
tech through the doorway at the end of the room.

"They'll be a minute or two getting into environmental suits and clearing
the airlock." Lauren said. "A necessary precaution I'm afraid. About a
year
ago we had an accident in one of our labs. A test version of Rebus got out
while some of the Rebus development team were working with some test
animals. The environment in there is full of Rebus. But you'll see that
the
results were somewhat startling. You should also be able to recognize the
current flaw in Rebus. "

"We are really at our wit's end with Rebus. Which means we've had to put
additional effort into our R&D with nanotechnology. Since New U patented
their nanite construction technology, giving us a leg up on developing our
own nanites. They're not as sophisticated as what New U is capable of but
that will change. What they haven't patented or copyrighted is their
molecular encoding process or the operating language they use. That we did
need."

A door opened by the kennel area and two suited figures, one carrying a
bucket and the other what appeared to be a cattle prod. As the first
started scooping what Harry assumed to be feed into the scattered food
bowels, he noticed movement in the underbrush at the edge of the kennel.

"They scent food very quickly." Lauren commented.

Harry's breath caught in his throat as Slowly the one then another of the
large 'dogs' came out of the brush. Finally five of the creatures made
their way to the waiting bowels. Most moved quite capably on all fours,
but
two had apparent difficulty. one because of a pair of distinctly human
breasts which got in the way of her fore legs. Harry had trouble
identifying the other's problem, til he saw him sit by the bowel furthest
from the pack leader. He gingerly scooped food out of his bowel with
his...
hands? That would account for his difficultly walking. It couldn't be easy
feeding himself either as it seemed he was unable to rotate his 'hands'
palm up. Harry noted silently that the dogs human, rather than canine hair
patterns made them seem that much more alien than even the very human
faces, with their shortened snouts that made feeding a quite messy affair.

"Marion must be waiting for David and Jeremy to leave before she'll move
away from the pups. ", Lauren commented. " See how they've established a
crude pack order? Sam inspects everyone's bowel and appropriates anything
he finds interesting."The one eating with his hands is Larsen, poor boy.
Used to head this section. Now because he's not able to function
efficiently as a dog he's become 'odd man out'."

Harry's eyes widened in disbelief. Dr. Hanson suppressed an inappropriate
chuckle. "Oh I'm sorry I didn't make it clear. What you are looking at are
what's left of the nine members of the Rebus team caught by the accident.
They were using a canine version of rebus to clean the congenital deafness
out of a dalmatian's DNA.", She shook her head sadly. "That's the main
problem with Rebus. The bacterial component easily survives in most
mammals
and we need a more compact programing language to keep our Groomers from
converting everything it encounters to its matrix. After all, we're trying
to skim the scum out of the gene pool, not rebuild the earth in Dr Moreu's
image."


[Rick: Dinner, Saturday Night]


Rick watched Jamie and Dan leave the room. That girl will have to watch
her
step around Dan, he thought. He'd never seen Dan take such an instant
dislike to anyone before. Hopefully it's just the tension working its way
out. He took out his cell phone, tapped a number and waited. Still, Jamie
seemed a sharp lass and not all that disturbed by her situation.

"Rick, why haven't.." Chris halted her inquiry when Rick lifted a finger.
After about six rings, he was greeted by a rumbling "Hello?"

"George? This is Rick.....Yes, I know it's Saturday night. Considering
circumstances of the past week or so; I didn't think you'd mind. Now
secure
this line." Rick waited while alternating tones told him that George's
phone and his were discussing scrambling/descrambling protocols. Then
there
was the click confirming the scrambler was in fact engaged.

"Okay George, I just got into Baltimore...No, I already have someplace to
stay. I want a meeting at Gordon/Star Monday, noon. Call it lunch. Have a
_complete_ report with Michael on hand. ....No don't do anything about it
til we have a chance to talk. Just make sure that ambitious slut Hanson
doesn't so much as take a shit but that you don't know how much and what
it
tastes like."

Chris mouthed "George?" at Anne, to which she whispered back, "Biomech".

"Alright, we'll discuss options then. No, they're as well as can be
expected considering. I do want you to start thinking about where Biomech
is going to start drawing funds to clean this up. I'll see you Monday.",
Rick put the phone back into his pocket. "Right. Anne, what has this done
to our schedule? "

"The our computer is back online and they're still working on a simplified
version of New U for general release, but you know we're going to be
blocked on distribution. Beth, Chris and I are still looking over the
possibility of altering the Nanites established in Dan and Jamie, but that
doesn't look encouraging.", Anne responded.

"Wait a minute." Chris said. "What was all that about Biomech? Were they
responsible for the sabotage that started this?"

Rick had the grace to look embarrassed. "Chris, you knew there were other
companies looking into similar technologies. Biomech has been trying to
produce something like the New U treatment scince before Anne approached
me. George is my Proxy holder at Biomech. When Beth leapfrogged the
existing technology, we began pressuring their R&D unit to produce or
abandonthe project. They'd already had one very expensive accident. The
funding they received through their parent corporation was quite
extravagant compared to the operating funds New U has to work with so it
looked like it was going to be a piece of cake. After all, Biomech started
the project on George's proposal."

"So how...?

"The project director appears to have acted on her own. That's what the
meeting on Monday is concerned about." Rick paused and flipped a few pages
in his notebook. "I'd like to suggest putting a recovery program on the
back burner. If we have to risk either of those kids lives to get them
back
to normal, then we won't do it. Dan is alive and healthy. He'll just have
to live with it."

"And if you get someone to carry on the family name out of it so much the
better?"

"Now Beth, that's... "

"An pertinant question.", The red-head insisted. "You led that poor child
to think we had a ready cure. Hell, We can't even suggest SRS for the kid
because _his_ system would 'repair' the 'damage' within a month and
hormone
therapy would be rejected by the nanites out of hand. "

" So instead of prepping him for the bad news and trying to convince him
that being my son meant no more to me than being my daughter, I let him
run
head on into a brick wall.", Rick was getting angry now. "That sounds like
I was really encouraging the boy! Now I Love my child, no matter what he
is."

Rick sighed, "I really hoped you would have come up with something. He's
been so misserable. Mary usually handles him when he's depressed, but he
hasn't let her near him. She's the psychiatrist in the family. I'm just an
old con-man with money.", Anne reached over to Rick, but he shook her off
and grinned. "Everything I've worked for for the past 30 years and more
has
been for the future. For my children and their children. And in one swell
foop it could come crashing down around my ears before it even really gets
off the ground."
"I wasn't joking before about needing to do some firebreaking. George is
holding up reports from Biomech's Nanite group and unless I can come up
with an amicable solution, our medical revolution may well spark the
resource war I've been trying to beat."

"I thought you were closing Biomech down?", Asked Chris.

"The shut down was going to be put to the board as a cost cutting measure.
If they find out they now have access to your technology... Well let's
face
it. The money-making potential of a cure all vacine is what Anne here
tried
to sell all our investors on in the first place. I do have an Idea about
how to get Biomech more or less off our back without taking us any further
off track though."


[Dan'l: Saturday night]

"Don't surround yourself with yourself
Move on back to squares
Send an Instant Karma to me
Initial it with loving care
Don't surround yourself"

- I Seen All Good People (a: Your Move)
(Jon Anderson)


Dan'l Angstrom closed the door to the room and looked around.

"I'm _not_ a boy."
The statement had less force behind it than when she told Jamie where to
get off a few moments before. Snapping the television on was even
depressing
. News and "Cops" reruns. At least it was noise. She thought as the
announcer droned on about the world's first commercially run space
shuttle.

Digging through the sports bag by the bed, Dan'l fished out a worn and
beaten diary. Pooh, Christopher Robin and Eeyore looked back, solemnly
guarding the contents as they had since Mom bought it for her during the
family's last trip to Disneyland, before starting treatments at the New U
clinic.

At that point she'd been practically wheelchair bound. The effort required
to get out of the car and into the chair, left her breathless. Raising the
book to her lips Dan'l raised the pitch of her voice a half octave and
spoke, "Here is Edward Bear, coming downstairs now, bump, bump, bump, on
the back of his head, behind Christopher Robin."

It was the first line from "Winnie-the-Pooh" one of her favorite books as
a
child and the reason Mom had bought it in the first place. The phrase
barely fit in the voice lock, but she'd been determined and finally got it
down into the chip in the thing. Sadly, she realized that If her voice
continued to drop, she'd have to reprogram it. It might be easier to just
get a new diary; this one was nearly full now anyway. There were only
about
five pages left to write on.

Before putting anything further down though, she paged through the book
slowly.

Apr 5th:

I was done today in only 3 hours! I know that sounds like a lot but, my
counts were down again so I got one unit of blood to top off my tank to go
with the CDS treatment. The CDS bag was like, a quarter of the size of
what
I was getting before though and only took about 10 minutes to administer.
The rest of the time was waiting for the blood to warm and getting it in
through the Hickman.

I didn't even need the anti-nausea medicine! (Keeps the tummy from doing
weird things but it gives me really shitty headaches.)
Dr. Howe was there to make sure everything went smoothly the first time,
but she looked different somehow. I know she's at least as old as Dad, and
she looked the same as when I met her last week, but something was
definitely different about her. It was like she was acting her age rather
than .........................


Of course now Dan'l knew that she, Ms. Anderson and Ms. Williams _were_
acting their age. But then, she'd only met them once before, when they
looked her over to see if their Chemo Delivery System might help her.
It did too, Dan'l admitted. It just wasn't a cure. Not for her anyway.

Oct. 3

...........Mom's worrying again. This last conference with Anne was
upsetting for her. Seems what we hoped fell through again. The CDS has
stopped the progression, but I'm making cancer cells as fast as the
cytoxin
can kill them. Dad sent us home while he discussed some more "business"
with Anne.

When we got home, Mom and I spent an hour or so in meditation while we
waited for Dad. I wish he would spend more time with Mom. I think it
exhausts her to be brave in front of me by herself and she really needs
some support from him.

On the up side, I haven't needed blood for the last month and I really do
feel better than I have since the bone marrow failed. I let her know that
and she seemed to perk up a little.

PBS is running "The Lion, The Witch & The Wardrobe" tonight. Break out the
popcorn!..........


Dan'l smiled. That had been a good night, achy joints and all, snuggled
between her parents in front of the tube. Next to The Forty Acre Wood,
Narnia was one of her favorite places to lose herself in. One of the
therapists Mom took her to was into "visualization therapy" and had Aslan
battling the forces of the Ice Queen in her body.
That didn't work either.


Feb 6:


Well Dad's surprise was a stunner, if not new. I'm going to be starting a
new experimental treatment in the next couple of months. That was the "not
new" part. The stunner was watching Anne, Chris and Beth remove their
"faces" to prove the treatment works, after introducing me to the
technicians who'd be giving me the treatment they named after the company.
They literally rebuilt them selves and if I survive (more on that later),
I'll not only be in full remission, I'll be cured!..............




July 18:


.....ACK! Now I know why babies scream and holler when they're forced to
breathe air for the first time! You don't mind liquid once you get over
the
initial shock of breathing it, but afterwards! Even when you get through
coughing the foul stuff out of your lungs, you feel all slimy inside for
hours after. Yuck.

The Therapy room was in a different part of the clinic. on the third
floor. Chris said it was her workshop and it looked like something out of
a
TV science fiction show that spent beau coup money on permanent sets, and
then had to fudge any additions.

And that tub was definitely an addition. It looked like the ones used at
SeaWorld to take care of sick dolphins, except it had a large
reticulation/filter system attached. They used the scale for invalid
patients to hoist me into it after putting me under. We know that the SOUP
works though. Now they say it'll take a month or so to get the treatment
finalized and that starter solutions "cooked".
After five months of prep and hypno training, I'm ready to ...............

"...start a new life." Dan'l sighed and skipped forward to the blank
pages.

Aug 25:

Well, the good news is I'm not sick. The New U treatment is working. The
bad news is, the reason my clit has been swelling up and my (GOD I can't
believe this!) vagina sealed itself, is that I'm turning into a MAN!

According to Anne and Beth there was a really bad sabotage attempt at the
clinic and I got some guy's treatment, or it got mixed with mine. It
doesn't make any to me. All I know is that a 30 year old man is running
around in the body that should be mine.

His/her name is Jamie. I don't know what to feel about her. Part of me
hates her and the fact that she'll be experiencing everything I dreamed of
for the past five years and the other part- There's something happening
between us that reminds me of Mom. For a moment, just as we met the
feeling
of connection was so "tight" it overwhelmed me. Then the connection
snapped
close. Like a door slamming-HARD. That feeling was accentuated when she
dropped the two huge suitcases she was trying to get out of the car on my
feet.

The rest of the time she's so "surface" though. I mean, Mom always said I
had a knack for reading people; her in particular. But although Jamie
_looks_ normal (as normal as one could expect considering), it's like a
well crafted mask. But the mask was made to fit a different set of
features, if you take my meaning. It looks quite good until you notice the
edges overhang the face a bit.

And that was what made it so noticeable to me. The mask _doesn't_ quite
fit. It slips occasionally, Jamie corrects quickly. I doubt even Dad can
read him effectively. Nonetheless, if you poke her hard enough the real
Jamie peaks through. .............


Dan'l put down his pen and closed the diary. He had been poking and
prodding at Jamie all night. The phallic imagery of the thought couldn't
be
lost be lost on Dan'l as he entered the bathroom, got out of his sweats
and
made him stop. She'd (HE'D) been trying to force her way through Jamie's
defenses. Provoke her into action. Granted, she'd(HE'D) gotten a couple
minor responses from him. But for the most part, Jamie had responded by
just retreating further into her shell and presenting a calmer, more
flippant (if possible) face than before. Instead, she (HE) had ended up
acting like a bully.

Dan'l's hands started moving the bar of soap around his body as warm water
from the showerhead beat a staccato rhythm on his chest. Like it or not
with one well timed statement, Jamie stuck at the core of Dan'l's problem.
She'd even stumbled across an acceptable name at dinner. One Dan'l knew he
could hear without cringing or ignoring.

Rinsing the spreading hair across his flat chest, he looked down and there
was the most undeniable evidence what was happening and that his
declaration to Jamie was blatantly wrong. All four inches of it hung
limply
to the left as he began slowly soaping the dense hair surrounding his (Go
on, say it.) penis and the developing flap of skin where his outer lips
had
been. Where his scrotum was forming.

Dan'l finished washing and toweled himself off quickly and began pulling
on
the pajamas Dad bought him before they left. Looking in the mirror he
brushed out and blow dried his hair. Jamie did let slip some interesting
information though. She was aware of the link between them as well.
Dan'l's
last attack had been meant to unnerve Jamie. Instead, Jamie had only
confirmed his suspicion that they were inadvertently influencing each
other.

The link between them was at least as strong as the one Dan'l and his Mom
had forged over their years of meditation together. Stronger really. It
took them two years to form the bond. The bond he hadn't felt for the past
few days. A bond lost because he couldn't bear to reveal himself to his
Mother now that he was healthy, but had reveled in while sick and in his
own mind disfigured. Was this that much different?

"Alright, so I _am_ a boy." He said, running his hand round the contours
of
his face. It wasn't a bad face as such things went. Strong jaw line,
deep-set eyes, a straight but not pointy nose. No unibrow; that was a
relief. Just enough baby-fat still lingering to remind one that this is
still a kid. If she'd seen this guy five years ago, she might have thought
he was kinda cute.

"Course, I'll be cute in a Grizzly Adams way if I don't do something about
this", Dan'l said to the mirror rubbing his rapidly sprouting beard. When
his hair had started spreading up his stomach and across his chest, he'd
been afraid the treatment had left him with hyper-trichosis. He could take
care of that tomorrow. Tonight he'd use it to help with coming to terms
with his new status.

He put the sweats and underwear in a laundry bag, staring at the panties
and bra (never mind the extra socks) he'd worn earlier. "No backing up. Do
the next thing." Walking back to his room, Dan'l knew that the first step
to understanding his twin Jamie was to understand self.

The TV was still yakking inanely so he turned it off. He'd left the
meditation candle at home, but that was a convenience, not a necessity.
Clearing some space at the side of the bed, he chucked the PJs and sat in
the position his Mother had taught him. He'd never really bought into his
Mom's New Age beliefs. That didn't mean her belief in the power of
meditation and self-hypnosis was entirely bogus either. While neither had
been able to actually do anything about the cancer eating away at him,
Dan'l always felt better after a session. The position was now
comfortable,
but also made him aware of his body.

This might have been easier with Mom to guide him but he thought he should
be able to do this initial probe himself. Turning his mind inward, he
began
checking himself out. Extending his awareness through the core to the ends
of each extremity and back again; building a cohesive self image.
Dan'l almost laughed to look at it. The image he stepped away from was
Jamie. Or at least, the way Dani had pictured herself in the sessions with
Mom or her therapist. The differences negligible. He circled the image and
began reshaping it to fit reality. Slowly exploring himself from the
inside
out, he pulled the tissue in from his chest and expanded his shoulders.
Did
he have a 15 or 16 inch neck? Another giggle ensued when he realized he'd
left his nipples at their old silver dollar size.

As he started in on each area he tried to cherish it fully before
releasing
it and bringing the new form in. Dan'l took as long a he needed. Time
meant
nothing where he was now. When the image in his mind's eye matched what he
was getting used to seeing in the mirror every morning now, he settled
into
it and realized that for the first time since undergoing transformation at
the clinic he could _feel_ what was happening inside him again.
He could feel his new testicles which were now finishing the journey
downward they'd started a week ago, filling the empty sack between his
legs. The final stage of his transformation was complete. Dad now had
someone to carry on the family line.

No! negative thought. Dad's wishes are of no importance. Calm steady
breaths. Release your anger. Richard Angstrom's wish for a son is
irrelevant. You are Dan'l Angstrom. You are almost 18 years old and you
will live beyond this century; maybe even the next.
With that thought, Dan'l sank into his mind to begin the second phase of
his self examination.

The room was a jumbled mess. Memories of Dani Angstrom's life were
scattered everywhere. He wasn't surprised by its condition. It had been a
while since he'd done any house cleaning in here and Dani had spent the
last few days mulling over 'might-have been's and 'used-to-be's. He picked
through the scattered memories; cherishing each as much as possible before
putting them away. Some were loving moments like the evening watching TV
with Mom and Dad. Feelings of safety and security. Laying out in the back
seat, on the way home and knowing all was right with the world while Mom
and Dad were in the front seat. Happy times, Watching Daddy cheer a
particularly good hit a little league, or finding and getting a hug from
Pooh at Disneyland on her third birthday.

Some were vague wispy things that were hard to pick up, but evoked strong
responses. A small red terrycloth robe with Pooh sewn on the pocket,
smelled of Uncle Jack's pipe tobacco and Dan'l spent some time in his
cabin
listening intently as he read her favorite stories.

Eventually all that were left were the 'Dust Bunnies' under the bed. He'd
never ventured in there without Mom's or his therapist's guiding hand.
Slowly Dan'l reached into the shadows and pulled each out. A 'Get Well'
gift reminded Dan'l of an incident during the during the Bone Marrow. Dani
had been so hopped up on pain killers at one point that she spent and hour
arguing with a cat...and only after conceding that the cat was in fact
right (Regis is the Anti-Christ) did she begin to suspect the toy balloon
of having ulterior motives. A jump rope that brought Dani to tears a week
after her original diagnosis when the closing phrase of "Yes my child by
and by", took on a more relevant meaning.

There too many of those Dan'l thought. But each was taken and held and
incorporated. These were the things, both good and bad that made up Dani
and laid the foundation for Dan'l.

Then Dan'l stood alone and naked in a clean and orderly room. Not empty,
everything was that had been there, still was. All the unresolved issues
and fears had been packed into the the closet, but the door was open and
they waited for resolution and confrontation. He felt ready to deal with
the world now. Except for the music coming in through the window.

Window? There'd never been windows here before. Open or otherwise.
Examining it more closely he saw that the widow wasn't really open. the
screen was down. Beyond the screen was an even more interesting sight. A
corridor made of concrete, like you'd expect to find in an underground
garage or the emergency exits for a mall. At the far end a set of polished
oak doors opened out onto a very high priced office set. After staring
awhile, Dan'l thought he caught a glimpse of two people, one in a in
business suit and the other in rags hurridly running back and forth.
Dan'l had constructed the room he was in years ago, with the aid of his
Mother and Therapist. It was patterned after his room in the old house and
while the original did have a window (two in fact) He'd purposefully kept
the walls here clean of outside distractions. There was no other way to
look at this but as a distraction.

The noise coming from the offices was increasing in volume. For a moment
Dan'l though he heard a woman laughing. The comings and goings in the
office were picking up tempo as well. A breeze began wafting up the
corridor. It carried a very familiar smell to Dan'l. He'd just spent a lot
of time breathing it in. The smell of Dust Bunnies left too long under the
bed was being stirred up over there. Even as he identified the scent of
fear, Frick and Frack over in the office collided with each other and the
doors to the office slammed shut on themselves.

The shock of that sound made Dan'l open his eyes in the real world. Unlike
any other session, he felt bone weary, and a little apprehensive. Bleary
eyes scanned the non-descript room he was given and eventually landed on
the clock on the wall. "Geez, It's past three.", Dan'l said raising to his
feet unsteadily. He felt like he'd just woken from a bad dream and
meditation should never produce that kind of feeling. Loneliness and
uncertainty flared briefly in the back of his head, sending tingles
through
his gut. Dan'l shivered and pulled his PJs back on.

Crawling under the covers, Dan'l reached over to the night stand and
picked
up the phone. "Mom... It's me. ", He said turning off the light and trying
to feel her comforting presence.

***

The talk with Mom helped clear the air about some things and Dan'l woke up
feeling much better than he had in a week. The reflection that greeted him
in the mirror was actually smiling today. A fuzzy smile to be sure but
that
could be taken care of easily he thought, toweling his hair. Digging
through the small case on the sink, Dan'l pulled out the electric razor
his
Dad packed. Twenty minutes later Dan'l gve it up as a lost cause and
joined
his father Anne, and Chris for breakfast.

"Planning on growing a beard?", Dad asked, scooping some white goo onto a
forkfull of bisquet and egg.

"Not really, just didn't seem too important.", Dan'l said scratching an
itch on his cheek. "Am I allowed to have breakfast before my check-up?"
The
savory scent of sausage had Dan'l's mouth watering.

"Go ahead, this morning's check-up is my first chance to have a look at my
favorite paitent since you came out of the tank. How do you like your
eggs.", Anne said, fixing Dan'l a plate. "By the way, did you see the cook
this morning while you were upstairs."

"No, I havn't seen Beth at all this morning."

"Dan son, I think your prejudces are showing." Dad said around mouthfull
of
bisquit. "What woman in her right mind today would fix a breakfast so
loaded with fat, grease, salt, and chloresteral without a alternative?"
Anne commented that Dad wasn't much better for that remark and that given
Dan's evident need for starch and protiens she might have prepped
something
similar, but today was Jamie's day to do breakfast.

Dan'l had to admit Mom might make something like this for Dad, but would
have made sure he got no other junk food the rest of the day. "Well, I
haven't seen Jamie this morning, but I think she was up and about pretty
early."

"Alright, finish your breakfast and meet me down at the lab. I want to do
a
quick walkabout to make sure Jamie's ok."

Anne seemed preoccupied all during the exam and as promised, nothing out
of
the ordinary occurred.

"Well," she said as beth took the samples down from the examination room
to
the main lab below. "Beth's tests and the kids at Hopkins get the final
say, but I will venture to say that outside of your accelerated
metabalism,
you are the very model of ayoung man just getting over his growth sprut."

"I want to talk to a dietitary specialist, but I think I'm going to put
you
on one of the protein supplement drinks to try to get your appitite under
control until you finish growing out."

"Doc, Why isn't Jamie scarfing everything down the same way I am?

"He's...heh, She's got a bit less growing to do than you. You're 5' 7"
right now. By the end of the year our computer is projecting you at just
under 5' 11". Maybe a little taller. Your Father's a good 6' and Jamie was
5' 10". I'm not saying you'll be the next Arnold, but your genetic makeup
is currently well disposed toward looking very emphatically male. So, in
addition to at least three or four inches in height, your body is trying
to
increase your mass proportionally."

"Jamie also has about two or three inches in height to gain but much less
muscle and bone mass. In fact she's dumped a large proportion of her
bodyweight as it is."

"I know what Dad,'s like, but what about Jamie?"

"I'm afraid I'm a little prejuduce where she's concerned.", Anne blushed
slightly for the first time since Dan'l had known the doctor. "I love her
like my own. How are you and your father getting along?"

"I don't know what to think about him anymore." Dan'l clenched his fists.

"He and I have always had a weird kind of relationship I guess. I mean, he
was always interested and wanted to be there for me but the only times he
could be depended on was if I was in an important game or seeing a new
doctor or about to have a major operation. It was like he just couldn't be
bothered by any award I got, unless it was for sports. Did you know my
last
recital before had to stop playing guitar, I was considered one of the
best
classical players in the state? Maybe I just wanted too much from him."

"Why don't you come out here and play for me now Sweetheart." Came Rick's
voice from the door way. "Doctor? Is Dan finished?"

"Go along dear, I think it's time for your recital."Anne said patting the
child on the rump.

"Before you say anything else Dad, we have got to talk about my name...."

***

Rick had brought the six string out to porch and Dan'l inspected the
insturment carefully before begining to tune it. He worked up slowly
testing long and uncalussed fingers with pieces like "Tom Dooly" and
"Scarborough Fair". They talked through all the while. Dan'l thought he
might be limber enough to take a crack at Steve Howe's "Clap" when Rick
asked his son to sing.

Dani had often sung in the shower, but was never felt her voice was
unsuitable for anything but her own enjoyment. "Dan'l, I know I never
really went out my way to see you perform, but I always paid attention
when
you played and one hearing you "hum and strum", was one of the more
relaxing things I got to do when I was home."

Dan'l thought for a moment as Chris dropped off some drinks and picked a
song he thought his voice could handle. He had a little trouble with
finding his pitch at first, but by the time the chours swung around he was
staring out past the front hedges and felt he could almost hear the alto
harmony gliding airily round his tune. The feeling was of a good bonding
taking hold and staring at his father he knew that more than one bond was
going to be established today.







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