DEEP SPACE 9: I've Looked at Life from Both Sides Now

By Uncle Mike


     Kira plucked the two steaming glasses of bluish liquid from 
Quark, the elephant-eared bar owner, and, with a piercing look, 
dismissed his attempt to hang around.

     She waited until he had turned and taken several steps away 
before her stern face dissolved into a giggling smile. She slid 
one of the glasses across the smooth, round tabletop as she 
turned to her companion.

     "So tell me, Jadzia, what was it really like?"

     Jadzia, a slim, dark-haired young woman with a leopard-like 
pattern of spots curving down from her forehead, took a sip of 
the potent brew and smiled with her eyes over the rim at her 
friend.

     "What was what like?" she asked, putting down the glass.

     The wrinkles running across the bridge of Kira's pert nose 
got even deeper. "You know exactly what I'm talking about, and 
don't you try to tell me different," she said, with laughter 
behind her words. "So come on, tell me. You've been putting me 
off too long."

     Jadzia, the space station's computer expert, seemed to enjoy 
dealing with a real human being instead of bits and bytes; she 
took the teasing lightly but appeared disinclined to give in so 
easily.

     She and Kira, the second-in-command, would have made an 
unusual pair in an Earth bar. There was their alien appearance, 
of course, although in both cases the differences from Earth 
form were small. And there was a slight Mutt-and-Jeff look, 
with Jadzia's lean look and long hair contrasted with Kira's 
smaller, more husky build and close-cropped head. And then 
there were their personalities. Though both showed hints of 
girlishness, Jadzia hid hers behind a serious expression that 
seemed to bear the weight of centuries; Kira's softer side was 
often hidden behind a gruff, easy-to-anger exterior.

     For all that those things would make them a mild curiosity 
on Earth, however, here in the weird goulash of Quark's multi-
planetary clientele, they looked positively boring.

     So boring, indeed, that no one turned a head, or any other eye-
bearing appendage, when Kira playfully prodded Jadzia's arm and 
the taller woman burst out in laughter.

     "OK, OK, I'll tell you," she said, washing the statement down 
with another swig. "But it's not really easy to put into words. I 
mean, I've had hundreds of years to work it out."

     "You mean Dax has had hundreds of years," Kira said.

     "Dax, Jadzia, every day it gets harder to tell us apart."

     "But there's still a lot of Jadzia there," Kira pressed. "And I 
want Jadzia, the woman, to tell me what it was like for Dax to 
be in men's bodies. How did it feel? What was it like to be in 
love as a man? What was -- what was it like to MAKE love as a 
man?" She ducked her eyes down as she finished.

     "Kira Nerys! I knew that's what you were after all along. So 
much for grand philosophical insights! You just want to know 
what it's like on the other side of the sheets."

     Kira blushed faintly. "Well, why not? Weren't you a little 
curious before -- you know?"

     "We're prepared very carefully to receive the symbiont," 
Jadzia said, trying to keep a straight face. "We must deal with 
many serious issues. There's no time for ..."

     Kira had tilted her head and her stare was boring into 
Jadzia's eyes. 

     "... Oh, OK, you win. Of course I wondered."

     "So?" Kira was leaning forward now, whispering 
conspiratorially. "What was it like?"

     "What can I tell you? It was -- different."

     "Better? Worse?"

     "Yes."

     Kira sat back and sipped at her drink, waiting out her friend. 
Jadzia finally went on.

     "Well, it was. Better and worse. Or -- well, maybe 'better' 
and 'worse' aren't the right words. It was -- well, it wasn't as -
- sophisticated? Complex?"

     "You mean wham, bam, thank you, ma'am?"

     "No, not -- well, yes, one or two of Dax's male hosts were 
like that, in fact. But most of them were a lot more thoughtful. 
No, I mean that the feelings on the inside don't seem as 
complicated as in a woman's body. It's like we make love with 
our whole minds and our whole bodies."

     "And a guy just thinks through his cock, right?" Kira barked 
out a laugh as she drained the last of her drink.

     Jadzia smiled slightly. "Something like that. But, if you 
really want to start to understand -- there's a better way to 
explain it." Her eyes narrowed. "If you're really interested, I 
mean."

     Kira raised her eyebrows. "Sure, I'm interested. So try me."

     "Not here." Jadzia rose from the table. "And unfortunately not 
now. I've got to go over some subroutines with Chief O'Brien. But 
come to my place after dinner."

     Kira nodded her assent and then left the bar as well.

   ===   ===   ===   ===

     Odo, who looked like a clay sculpture someone hadn't quite 
finished, looked up from his reports as Kira entered the cubicle 
that served as office for the security chief.

     "Major Kira," he said, leaning back in his chair. "To what do I 
owe the honor?"

     "Just making the rounds, Odo," the young woman said, 
striding over and sitting down on the other side of the cluttered 
desk. 

     "Nothing more?" He steepled his hands before him.

     "What do you mean? Can't I just drop in to chat?"

     Odo leaned forward. "Yes, of course, Major. It's just that -- 
well, isn't there something you're not telling me?"

     Kira closed her eyes for a second. "Odo," she said as she 
opened them again. "Is there anything that goes on that you don't 
know about?"

     "I certainly hope not," the security chief said, somewhat 
smugly.

     Kira smiled. "Just where do you get your information from, 
anyway?"

     "Major," he said, seeming to draw a breath, "I've run the 
security on this station under the Cardassians and now the 
Bajorans. I've got sources the Cardassians wouldn't have been 
able to get a word out of with all their torture. Do you really 
think your Bajoran charm is going to get them now?"

     "Charm? Why, Odo, that's the nicest thing you've ever said to 
me."

     Odo's face seemed to blur or even melt slightly; one might 
guess it was what passed for a blush with him. He bent his head 
back down to his papers.

     "Yes, well, if you're not ready to talk to me about it yet..."

     "Oh, all right, Odo. It's nothing important, really."

     "Not important? Just that after all this time the Bajoran 
government has decided that I have to undergo a yearly 
evaluation to make sure I'm doing a good job?"

     "Well, yes, but -- did your sources tell you who's doing the 
evaluation?"

     He was still looking down at the desk; he didn't see her grin. 
"No," he said, "but I would presume it's some bureaucrat from ..." 
At Kira's giggle he lifted his head and stared.

     "You?" he said, at last.

     "Yes, me," Kira said. "Who else? So don't worry about it, Odo, 
you've already passed the evaluation. We just need to fill out 
some forms for the record."

     "Well, in that case, Major, how about now? I'd just as soon 
get this over with so I can get on with my job."

     Kira began to nod, but then stopped. "Oh, sorry, I can't. I've 
got to talk to Commander Sisko before dinner, and I'm meeting 
Jadzia at her place after that. How about tomorrow? First thing 
after the shift starts?"

     Odo nodded, once. "Very well." He paused, then went on. "So 
you're seeing Lieutenant Dax tonight? No problem with the 
station's computers, I hope."

     "No, nothing like that. She's -- well, I guess I can tell you, 
Odo." Kira smiled broadly as her voice fell to a whisper. "She's 
going to tell me what it was like when she was a man -- I mean, 
when Dax was in men's bodies. Can you imagine what that was 
like?"

     Odo's eyelids fluttered. "I think I have an idea," he began to 
say.

     "No, Odo, I mean -- what it was like to be a  man with a 
woman! I can't wait to hear what she has to say!" With that, Kira 
bounced out of the chair and strode off.

     As she left, Odo looked after her. He kept looking at the door 
opening long after she'd gone through it.

   ===   ===   ===   ===

     The portal of Jadzia's quarters blooped when Kira approached 
and then opened with a swoosh.

     The lights were dim. Soft music -- alien to Kira's ears, but 
vaguely pleasing -- filled the room. An almost unnoticeable 
scent wafted on the imperceptible breezes stirred so softly by 
the space station's life support units.

     Jadzia was no longer in her well-tailored Federation uniform 
with the long-sleeved tunic and slacks. She had changed into a 
filmy gown that seemed to change from one pastel to another 
every time she changed position. It was held up only by two thin 
straps, allowing a clear view of the spots running down her 
neck. 

     Kira was still in her uniform, all well-pressed creases. She 
looked a bit uncomfortable as she walked over to where Jadzia 
was sitting -- lounging, really -- on what apparently passed for 
a couch. The smaller woman perched on the edge, testing it for 
support. 

     "I'm sorry about the uniform," she said, settling down into 
the thick, soft cushions. "I..."

     "Don't be silly," Jadzia said. "It's perfectly all right. Besides, 
I don't know if I'd recognize you without it!"

     Kira's face reddened slightly. "What do you mean? I do have a 
life outside of command ..."

     "Relax!" Jadzia tugged at Kira, pulling her back against the 
pillows until she, like Jadzia, was lying almost flat. "I didn't 
mean anything by it. It was just a joke. Come on, we're off duty 
now." With her long, slender fingers, Jadzia expertly massaged 
the stiff muscles of the smaller woman's neck and shoulders. 
"There, doesn't that feel better?"

     Kira sighed. "Yes, thanks," she said, as her whole body seemed 
to release its tension. "Wow, that feels great. Where did you 
learn to do that?"

     "It's a little trick Curzon Dax picked up, a few decades ago. 
You really like it?"

     This time Kira purred and said nothing.

     Jadzia continued to massage her friend, working out the 
kinks in Kira's arms.

     "I could just lie here and let you do that forever," Kira said, 
wriggling her shoulders. "But you said you could tell me more 
about -- you know."

     Jadzia's fingers worked their way down past the smaller 
woman's elbows. "Oh, you haven't forgotten? I must not be doing 
this right." She motioned to Kira to turn over. Then Jadzia 
straddled her and began to press her knuckles into the small of 
her friend's back, working her way up.

     "I don't think you could do it any better," Kira said, her voice 
muffled slightly by a pillow. She kicked off her boots and 
wiggled her toes, which hung just over the edge of the couch. 
"But I still want to know. How did it feel -- being inside a man?"

     "I don't know where to start," Jadzia answered, her 
fingertips pushing against Kira's shoulder blades.

     "Well, how about -- how about a kiss? What did a kiss feel 
like as a man?"

     "Compared to what?"

     Kira laughed. "Compared to as a woman, of course!"

     "Hmmm, let me see. Well, I'm not really sure. Maybe I have to 
refresh my memory." With that, Jadzia rolled Kira over onto her 
back, still straddling her. The taller woman bent down and 
pressed her lips to her friend's smiling face.

     Kira seemed surprised. Her eyes opened wide as Jadzia 
pressed down. Then Kira's lips opened slightly as Jadzia slipped 
her tongue inside. Kira's arms closed around her friend's waist. 

     Their kiss lasted for minutes as their tongues explored each 
other's mouth while their hands roamed and their legs tangled 
together. They rolled over on the soft cushions, coming to rest 
at last side by side as they broke their embrace.

     "Mmmm, it wasn't as good as that," Jadzia whispered.

     "Wh-what wasn't?" 

     "Kissing as a man." Jadzia stroked Kira's side as she spoke. 
"It was never so soft."

     "No." 

     Jadzia smiled. "And how would you know?"

     "I mean -- it never felt like that for me. With a man, I mean. 
So soft. So..." Kira pressed her lips to Jadzia's again. Their 
mouths open, they kissed hungrily. Jadzia slipped a hand 
underneath Kira's tunic and slid it around her waist. Their bodies 
pressed together tightly.

     With a sudden movement, Kira broke the kiss and slid away 
from Jadzia, swinging her feet to the floor and sitting with her 
head in her hands. "What are we doing?" she half-sobbed. "I'm not 
-- I'm not that kind of woman! Not ..." She gulped. "...Not that 
there's anything wrong with that. It's just -- I'm..."

     Jadzia's voice came from behind her. "How do you know you're 
not that kind of woman? Have you ever tried it before?"

     "No!" Kira half turned but stopped, seeming afraid to face her 
friend now. She shook her head slowly. "I -- I like MEN," she said. 
"Always have."

     "I'll tell you a secret," Jadzia whispered back. "So do I."

     Kira's head snapped up, but still she didn't turn around.

     "That's right," Jadzia said. "I like men. And women. And 
there's nothing wrong with that. If there's one thing Dax has 
learned after all these centuries, it's that nothing's wrong if 
two people care for each other. And, Kira ..." Jadzia put a hand on 
the smaller woman's chin and turned it toward her. "... I do care 
for you. And I think you care for me."

     Kira's mouth fell open. Jadzia's filmy gown was gone, just a 
pile of pastel wisps on one corner of the couch. 

     Jadzia was sitting cross-legged behind her. Her taut breasts 
were capped by startlingly erect nipples. Her smooth stomach 
curved down to a velvety stripe of dark hair above a reddened 
labia, framed by the angles of her long, slender legs.

     "You said you wanted to know what it was like, for a man," 
she said. "I'd like to teach you." With that, Jadzia stretched out 
on the couch, resting her head on one of the throw pillows. She 
stretched out her legs, rubbing them up and down Kira's sides. 
"Do you want to learn?"

     Kira stood up, turning to face the couch. She moved slowly, 
stiffly, as if her mind and muscles weren't completely in synch. 
She stood for a moment and then put her hands on the bottom of 
her tunic.

     In one fluid move she pulled it up and off. Her breasts 
bounced free -- larger than Jadzia's, not quite as firm, crowned 
by dark brown cones that protruded slightly.

     Tossing aside the tunic, Kira slid out of her slacks. A downy 
triangle pointed straight at her opening. Freed of the starchy 
uniform, she still had something of the look of authority -- 
well-muscled arms and legs, an erect posture. But as she 
crawled onto the couch and moved toward Jadzia, her breasts 
hanging down and swaying from side to side, she seemed to 
soften.

     Jadzia raised her arms, bringing Kira to her. Again they 
kissed, this time pressing their breasts together. Their 
combined weight pushed down against the cushions, creating a 
nest for their lovemaking.

     As Kira kissed her way across Jadzia's neck and shoulders, 
her hand slid across her friend's supple body and found the 
already moist opening of her tunnel. Kira moved down, taking 
first one nipple and then the other into her mouth. Meanwhile her 
probing fingers fluttered around the other woman's labia, 
stroking gently the soft, creamy thighs.

     "You're doing very well for your first time," Jadzia 
murmured, her hands tracing circles on Kira's taut back. "But a 
man wouldn't be so gentle. Do it harder, Kira. I'm your woman. 
Take me!"

     Kira pressed two fingers deep into Jadzia. The taller woman 
arched her back slightly at the penetration. "Yes!" she sighed. 
"That's it. Be my man!"

     Harder and faster, Kira pushed her fingers in and out of the 
hot, wet tunnel as she kissed her way down the smooth stomach. 
Harder and faster her hand drove up and down until her face was 
hovering over the musky hole. Kira pressed her lips to Jadzia, 
smearing the sticky goo over her face as she pressed her tongue 
down, licking the clitoris.

     Jadzia shrieked at the contact. Her hands beat against the 
cushions, sending pillows flying. "Do it!" she cried. "Yes, Kira, 
fuck me with your tongue! Fuck me with your fingers! Do it like a 
man would. I like it rough!"

     Jadzia's legs closed around Kira's head and her hands pressed 
down on her friend's cropped hair. Still Kira's fingers kept up 
their rhythm and her tongue slipped back and forth on the 
sensitive clit.

     Then, with a loud moan, Jadzia began to shiver violently. Kira 
slipped her fingers out and drove her tongue into the opening, 
fucking with her tongue while she rode out the wild orgasm.

     "Lick me, Kira," Jadzia managed to get out. "Li-iiiiiiick me!"

     And then she could only screech as her body shook and froze, 
shook and froze. 

     When her wild gyrations ceased, Kira crawled back up 
Jadzia's body, licking and suckling as she did, until her own hot 
wet hole was poised over the other woman's tongue.

     Jadzia's tongue snaked upward, licking at the sensitive outer 
folds. Soon Kira's juices were flowing freely but still Jadzia did 
not enter her. The smaller woman ground her hips onto Jadzia's 
face. "Put it in me!" she commanded. "In me!"

     Jadzia wriggled free of the steaming tunnel for a moment. 
"You wanted to know what it was like to be a man, remember?" 
she said.

     Kira growled playfully. "Not any more! I want to be fucked 
like a woman!"

     "Well, all right," Jadzia conceded. "But you still have to do 
something for me. Reach underneath the couch. There should be 
something ..."

     "Is this it?" Kira pulled out a thick, shiny black rod, about as 
long as her forearm. It was bent slightly in the middle and each 
end came to a slightly bulbous tip. "Is this -- what I think it 
is?"

     "You wanted to be a man," Jadzia said, smiling. "So put it in 
me, Mr. Nerys."

     Kira twisted around, keeping her labia just above Jadzia's 
mouth, and bent down to insert the dildo in her friend's well-
lubricated tunnel. It slipped in easily.

     As she began to slide it in and out, fascinated at the way the 
labia curved around it, Jadzia pulled Kira's hips down and 
resumed her ministrations.

     In minutes the black rod was driving in and out of Jadzia's 
hole as she madly humped up at it, while Jadzia's tongue was 
deep within Kira and her fingers were sliding across the smaller 
woman's sensitive button.

     Kira came quickly, flooding Jadzia's face with even more 
fluids, before slipping off onto a dry area of the couch. But 
Jadzia continued to buck up at the dildo. "Don't stop!" she cried. 
"Fuck that cock into me, Kira! Harder! Harder!"

     Pounding away at her friend, Kira's own opening began to 
ache again. She slid around on the cushions until her hole was 
positioned close to the wildly waving tip of the dildo. In one 
motion Kira slid down, driving the rod into her while her leg and 
Jadzia's scissored together. Both women took the dildo in hand, 
plunging it back and forth between them as they looked lustily 
into each other's eyes.

     "Ohhhh, yes!" Kira groaned. "This is what I needed!"

     "See?" said Jadzia. "There are advantages to being a woman -
- as long as you have a stiff cock around somewhere!"

     They came together, each falling back against the couch as 
wave after wave pulsed through their exhausted bodies.

     A few minutes later, Jadzia gently pulled the dildo from her 
own sodden hole and then from Kira's. Dropping it onto the bed, 
she led her friend into the shower.

     The hot jet of water cascaded over their naked bodies, 
washing away the sweat and giving them back some energy. Kira, 
standing behind Jadzia, kissed each and every spot on her back. 
As she got to the bottom, Jadzia turned and opened herself to 
Kira's probing tongue again. She came quickly and then pulled 
Kira up, kissing her deeply, the taste of her own juices mingling 
with those of Kira's.

     At last they got out, wrapping soft fleecy robes around them.

     Jadzia took a few minutes to dry her hair. Kira, whose own 
short locks dried quickly, leaned against a wall of the bathroom 
and watched.

     "So you like it, I take it?" Jadzia said to Kira's reflection in 
the mirror.

     Kira blushed. "More than I ever thought I could," she said. 

     "Mmmm, and this was just the start," Jadzia said, glancing 
back to check Kira's reaction.

     "What do you mean?"

     "Well, if you'd never done it with a woman before, I take it 
you never had a man and a woman with you, either?"

     "A threesome?" Kira took a step forward. "Jadzia Dax, you've 
done a threesome?"

     "Dax has," she said. "And foursomes and fivesomes and once, I 
think, a twelvesome. It depends on whether you count that 
Arrekian as one or two. Hey, when you've been around for 
centuries, every once in a while you've got to do something for 
variety."

     Kira cocked her head. "So -- who would you do it with? In a 
threesome, I mean. Not -- not the doctor?"

     Jadzia laughed. "In his dreams. In MY dreams, though, I would 
think -- Benjamin."

     "Commander Sisko? You're kidding! You and he are old buddies. 
How could he ...?"

     "DAX and he are old buddies. I realize it might be a bit 
awkward for him -- but, don't forget, we were close friends. 
VERY close friends. I've seen his -- equipment. And if you think 
my dildo was something ..." She let the thought trail off as they 
left the small room.

     "Wow, this place looks like a hurricane hit it," Kira said, 
surveying the ruins of the couch, pillows strewn all over the 
floor. "Let me help you clean up."

     "Thanks," Jadzia said, already beginning to pick things off the 
floor. She dropped a couple of pillows back on the couch and 
looked around. "Did you happen to see where I left that thing, 
speaking of hard black rods?"

     Kira giggled. "Benjamin?"

     Jadzia smiled. "You know what I mean. I thought I left it on 
the couch. Maybe -- oh, here it is." She reached under the couch, 
flailing about with her hand until she came out with the dildo. 

   ===   ===   ===   ===

     In the corridor outside Jadzia's quarters, a shimmering green 
pool of ectoplasm bubbled and rose, metamorphosing into the 
familiar figure of the security chief. Odo brushed a few small, 
curly hairs off his uniform and began to walk away, pausing only 
briefly to look back wistfully at the portal.