____________________________ | | /)| KRISTEN'S BOOKSHELF |(\ / )| DIRECTORIES |( \ __( (|____________________________|) )__ ((( \ \ > /_) ( \ < / / ))) (\\\ \ \_/ / \ \_/ / ///) \ / \ / \ _/ \_ / / / \ \ o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o The Bookshelf Directories offer a very wide variety o o of stories. They have been submitted by people from o o all over the world. Also from alt.sex.stories (News o o groups). There is no particular order other than o o offering them to you in alphabetical directories. o o o o All works are copyrighted to the author and may not o o be used for profit without obtaining the author's o o permission in advance. o o o o Lest we forget!!! This story was produced as adult o o entertainment and should not be read by minors. o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o Always With Me 2 by Secret DC Guy (secretdcguy@hotmail.com) *** Brian meets the girl from next door, and learns that unfortunately they have something in common. There is no sex, but Brian knows there is something different about her. After playing together the day a direction is set when she asks him to sleep with his lights on and his blinds open. (bg, youths, no-sex, rom) *** Chapter 2: A Knock at My Heart Although I had fallen asleep late the night before, I awoke early on Sunday for no reason. Though technically Methodist, my family wasn't particularly religious, so we rarely went to church. As far I as knew, we didn't have any plans. But here I was lying awake as the first rays of the sun shone through my window. It was before 6 AM, so I knew my parents wouldn't be awake. I also knew that the loose floorboards on the steps would prevent me from going downstairs, as the noise would definitely wake my parents. Don't get me wrong, they wouldn't be mad at me. They would just get up to supervise, then be grumpy for the rest of the day. Adults need sleep as much as kids do. About the only place I could go to without waking anyone was the bathroom. So I slid out of bed to head for the door. However, the way I got out of bed directed my vision towards the new girl's window. I don't know if she always did it, but she slept with the blinds open. That brought a smile to my face because I did the same thing. For some reason having the blinds closed at night made my room feel too dark, too closed off from the rest of the world. I wasn't sure if she kept hers open for the same reason, but I decided to believe it was, at least until I found out otherwise. No matter the reason, though, my heart began to flutter again. I figured the new girl wouldn't be naked, but I still wanted to see her angelic face framed by strawberry blonde hair. However, the call of Mother Nature was too strong, so I quickly made my way to the bathroom. When I got back to my room, I immediately went to the window. I was fully prepared for her room to be too dark to see into. Where my room faced the north giving me morning sun in the summer, hers faced south. So with no sunlight shining into her room, I figured it would be too dark to see anything. However, I was surprised to see her bedside light on. It was dim, but I could make out a number of things in her room. First, her bed sheets were kicked off and she slept in the shorts and t-shirt pajamas that I had seen her take out of the drawer last night. In addition, I saw a large stuffed dog next to her pillow. Finally, I saw that her face wasn't so angelic in the morning. While she still looked beautiful, her hair stuck out all over the place. It even looked as if she might be drooling a little. She was much more human than she had appeared the night before. For some reason that made me want to be near her even more. Angels are something that you can't see or feel. Some people say they don't exist. This girl, on the other hand, was real. She was there for me to meet and be friends with. You can't play with an angel, but I could play with her. It's just that I wanted more from her than just a playmate. I couldn't figure out what I wanted, but I knew it was more. I sat in the window until she rolled facing away from me. It was only about seven by now, but I couldn't think of anything else to do, so I left my room and started down the stairs. I may sure to step very hard on the loose floorboard. Just as I planned, my parents began to stir. *** The night before I wasn't sure what 'the talk' was, but considering my parents made bacon, sausage, eggs, pancakes, and waffles for breakfast I knew it was a big deal. In our house, food served many purposes. Besides just eating, we used it to celebrate, to mourn, or to prepare for something important. It seemed as if every big announcement came after a big dinner. However, while we were eating, my parents didn't push the point. Instead, they talked about what I might want to do over the summer. They suggested going to the beach or maybe Hershey Park, and seemed to leave the decision up to me. The amazing things was that I didn't want to go anywhere, at least not until I met the little girl. I mean, I was a normal kid. I loved the beach, and amusement parks even more. But it almost seemed sad to go somewhere without her. Without really thinking, I said to my mom, "Maybe the new girl could come too?" For a moment the room was silent. Then almost in unison, my father and mother took deep breaths. It seemed as if they had worked themselves up to this conversation, but had still hoped beyond hope that they would not have to have it today. Perhaps they thought I would forget about the girl, or maybe if they ignored her, she would go away. Unfortunately for them, I had forced their hand. We were going to have 'the talk'. My mother started, "Brian, when you're older, your body is going to go through changes. When that happens, things might get confusing. Your body is going to want to do one thing, and your brain is going to tell you to do another. What you're going to have to do is to listen to that little voice inside of you, to tell you what's right." I wish I could say I was uncomfortable, but in reality, I was just confused. I had no idea how my body changing had anything to do with this girl. My father glanced at mother seeming to say 'I told you so'. He picked up the conversation in a way he thought I might better understand. "OK kid, here's what's what. You're too young to do it right now, but that little wee-wee of yours isn't just for peeing. When you get older your body is going to start wanting to make babies. You use your wee-wee for that too. But for that to work, a girl has to make it feel good, like a tickle but a good tickle. You have to make the girl feel good too, of course. Thing is, your body just isn't old enough to do that right now." While I was confused about my feelings at the beginning of the conversation, I was even more so now. I thought that the tickle my dad was talking about might be the one I felt last night. Did that mean I was ready to make a baby with the girl? But I first felt it when I thought she was a boy. But two boys can't make a baby. So why did my body want to make a baby with another boy? But I had noticed that from behind she didn't look like other boys and I saw the flower pajamas too. Deep down, did I really know she was a girl? Did my body know she was a girl even thought my brain didn't? Then should I really trust my brain? I was so confused, I felt like crying. My mother gave my father a stern look. It was obvious that she didn't like his approach to 'the talk'. She continued, "Brian, if things weren't complicated enough, you had what Julia did to you. I don't think she meant to hurt you, but she was thinking with her body and not her brain. She's old enough to have a baby, and her body told her so. But rather than trying to find somebody she loved to do things with, she decided to do what she did to you." I wanted to bring up the fact that Julia said she loved me, but I thought that might things worse. My mother continued, "Now we're not saying that Julia should have gone and made a baby or that you should start making them when you start feeling that you want to. You really need to wait until you're a grown up for that. When you get older, we'll talk about how to prevent it." Honestly, I really didn't care about how to make babies, or if Julia wanted to make one. In the past day, she had begun to fade from my thoughts, replaced by the girl with the angelic smile. What I needed to know is why I couldn't stop thinking about her. Finally, I asked, "Mom, dad, I don't care about Julia. I want to know why I want to kiss the new girl. When I saw her this morning, I even wanted to crawl in bed with her..." "There will be no looking in other people's windows," my mother snapped. "Mary, I'm sure he didn't mean to," my father sternly responded to her scolding. "The boy is confused about how he feels." Turning to me he continued, "Kid, here's the deal. Have you ever heard of 'a crush'?" "Yes..." I wanted to say more by was cut off. "Good, so you'll know what I'm talking about." My dad smiled, almost looking proud. "You have a crush on this girl. It happens—usually when you least expect it. Now, it's probably got something to do with Julia —like it or not. She probably made you feel really special when she was doing stuff to you. That's the way people like her work. And then she's gone. So the first girl who gives you real attention disappears. It's natural to turn your thoughts to someone else. It's going to be this girl now, but it'll probably be someone else soon." I wasn't sure if that made me feel better or not. On one hand, there was hope that my feelings for her would calm down. On the other hand, I'd have them for someone else. It was really overwhelming. So I asked my father, "So what do I do?" My mother answered before my father could, "Be friends with her if you like. But remember that you're not going to go and get married or anything like that. When your feelings go back to normal, you'll have her as a friend." I really had no idea what to think. I really didn't see how my feelings could change, even with time. So I asked, "What if my feelings never change?" My father laughed and said, "Then we'll need to keep the two of you apart... at least until you get married." My mother shot an angry look at my father. "Jack, you're not helping! " To me, she continued, "They will my little one... they will." The conversation had been too much. I really didn't have anything to say, and didn't want to hear my parents talk about this anymore. I quietly said that I understood. There was always one way I could end uncomfortable conversation, so I went up and hugged my parents. It turned into a very tender, and quiet, family hug. For the first time since I had seen the girl in the driveway, I was not being buffeted with emotions. I just stood enjoying the safety of my parent's arms. Then the doorbell rang. *** "Hi! I'm Jennifer Jenkins, but people call me JJ. I just moved in next door! Wanna play catch?" the new girl exclaimed. She spoke quickly and directly, and I almost felt assaulted by her words. It was obvious that she knew what she wanted—she wanted to be friends with me. I had a feeling that she was the type of person who always got what she wanted, at least eventually. "Whoa, kid... Better slow down a bit," the big man I had seen the day before chuckled as he looked down at me. Looking over me at my father, who was standing behind me, he extended his hand and said, "I'm Jack Jenkins. We just move in next door. My daughter saw your son last night and just couldn't wait to meet him. I hope we're not disturbing you." "Not at all," my father said, as he invited them in. "I'm Kevin Schaffer. This is my wife Nancy, and my son Brian." In the living room, there was an unspoken agreement that the children should sit quietly until the parents had a chance to feel each other out. While they did that, the girl kept smiling at me. On one hand it made me feel embarrassed. However, every time I looked away, within seconds I found my gaze drawn back to her. As the conversation continued about trivial things, I wanted to run across the room and hug the girl. I could tell that something was on my mother's mind, as she kept looking at Mr. Jenkins in an almost suspicious manner. Finally, she asked, "Are you same Jack Jenkins who is building all the developments?" Mr. Jenkins let out an uncomfortable chuckle, "Well yes, that's me. But I'm not really as bad a guy as people make me out to be. Anyway, I got my start as a contractor building houses, and that's what I still consider myself." I understood the connection my mother was making. Mr. Jenkins was a controversial figure in the area. People were saying that he had come from out of town, and was buying up old farms to build ugly houses. He didn't build neighborhoods, just shacks for people to sleep in. A lot of folks didn't like that. My father put his hands up as if to stop Mr. Jenkins. "Jack... I hope it's OK if I call you that... You're not going to be judged in this house. First of all, my bank is financing most of the stuff you're building around here..." "Oh, you're with First Northeastern?" "Yes, I'm a branch vice-president and I'm on the board." "I can't tell you how happy I am with you guys. I'm sure you've taken a lot of heat about working with me. Oh, and yeah call me Jack." My father laughed, "You must not know the area up here. People talk a good game, but aren't willing to put their money where their mouths are. We've gotten nasty mail, obscene phone calls, and the president even got some death threats. But you know what? Deposits are up significantly. People see us doing business with you, so they think we're about to go big time. The more people yell, the better it gets. So maybe I should be asking you to piss off some more people." As he said it, Mr. Jenkins and my mother started laughing as well. When she was done laughing, my mother smiled, and said, "Jack, Kevin's wrong. You are going to be judged in this house. My husband and I have talked about the life you're breathing into this area. The problem is that you have all of these geriatrics who think this is still the 1950's and don't want to see a damn thing change. You are giving this area, and those old people, the kick in the behind they need. Yes, Jack, you've been judged and we're glad to have you as a neighbor." "Well, thank you, Nancy. I'm glad to be here as well. I've been looking forward to being here for a long time." "Jack, that begs the question," my father asked. "Why here? I mean you could live in any of your developments or have a big house in the country. Why in this neighborhood with the houses so close together?" "I could ask you the same thing," Mr. Jenkins smiled at my father. "I mean you're a bank VP and on the board." My dad thought for a second then said, "I guess we never really wanted anything more. We moved in here with Nancy's mother before she died, and just never saw the need for anything else. It's just the three of us, so we don't need anything bigger. And down here you're close to everything. We couldn't want more." "Exactly," Mr. Jenkins replied. "We lived down near Washington, DC for a long time. Pretty much lived down there all of my life. My father moved there for better opportunities when it was building up after the war. But he was originally from up here. In fact, the first two houses he built were for his parents and in-laws. In- laws were gone a long time ago, but his father lived in the house until maybe about fifteen years ago. Then he moved down with us, and some couple with a little girl bought it. I really missed that house because every summer I'd spend a couple of weeks with my grandpa, and they're some of my happiest memories. Anyway..." Before Mr. Jenkins could finish, my mother exclaimed, "Little Jack! Oh my god! I'm sorry I didn't make the connection. How's your little brother?" Mr. Jenkins chuckled again, "I don't believe that I didn't make the connection either. But then again, you do have a different last name now, and I don't remember people calling you Nancy. Nan, wasn't it? Anyway, Tony's good. He entered the ministry and has a bunch of kids. It's hard to believe, but he's five years younger than me—I think about your age— but he already has teenagers." After a few minutes explaining to my father that my mom and Mr. Jenkins's brother used to play when they were up over the summer, Mr. Jenkins's continued, though his face turned more somber, "Some things happened, and my wife, Judy, and I decided it was time to get out of DC Metro. We thought this would be a good place to raise JJ. "Oh, and just to get everything out in the open, I heard some stories about why that couple and their not-so- little girl left. Let me tell you can talk to Judy and me about it any time you want." Then looking sorrowfully down at his daughter, he said, "We know exactly how you must feel." The room was silent. I guess there was nothing any of the adults needed to say. Somebody had done something with this beautiful girl like Julia had done with me. I was about to make a mental note to ask her if she was in love like I had been, but when I looked across the room at her I knew it wasn't the case. The bubbly girl with the angelic smile was staring at the floor as if she were ashamed and scared. For the first time it occurred to me that maybe Julia wasn't being completely honest about loving me. At this moment though, the girl across the room from me looked really sad, so without thinking I ran across the room and hugged her. First I felt her arms lock around my back, and I felt her squeeze me. Then she laid her head on my shoulder, but didn't cry. For some reason the combination was magical. I felt as if the world had disappeared and it was just the two of us in the room. "I'm sorry," came out of my mouth though I hadn't even thought to say it. The sound of all the parents crying brought me back to into the room. At first, I thought I had said something wrong, but Mr. Jenkins started mussing my hair and saying how good of a kid I was. At the same time, my parents were saying how proud they were of me. I realized that I must have done the right thing. It was confirmed when I broke the hug with the girl, and she looked me in the eyes and smiled. The angelic smile was back. It seemed as if everyone had passed some kind of test, since Mr. Jenkins invited my parents over to meet his wife. The girl and I were encouraged to go play. *** About an hour later, JJ and I were sitting on the back steps of my parents' house panting. We had been playing catch non-stop, with JJ talking the entire time. I learned that she had a lot of friends by her old house until about a year ago. Then while she was at a friend's house, her friend's older brother touched her. She told her parents, who called the police, and the boy ended up being sent to a special school. Instead of people feeling sorry for her, people blamed her. Apparently, the guy was a really good athlete and people were upset he wouldn't be playing football for the high school any more. In the whole conversation, she seemed nonchalant. However, there on the steps she turned serious, "It was OK, Brian. He told me I was special and he wanted to play a special game with me. I just couldn't tell anyone about it. At first he just touched my chest. Then had me touch his wee-wee. It was weird because it got big and really hard. He seemed to like it thought. Then he touched my little button and it made me feel really good. But then he put his finger inside of me and it really hurt. I didn't think it was supposed to do that, so I asked my mom that night why it did. Then everything happened. I'm sorry I said anything because so many people got mad at my mom and dad." She started to cry. I didn't know what to do, so I put my arms around her and started to tell her about Julia and me. After a few seconds she stopped crying and listened attentively. She asked occasional questions like what it tasted like and if Julia had done anything to make me feel good. When I said she hadn't, JJ snorted and said that at least Mike had made her feel good. When I finished telling the story, she squeezed me tightly and said that we were two of a kind. Then she said something that I never forgot or got over. "Brian, promise me you'll always be with me?" she asked. To me next week was a long time away. 'Always' was something I couldn't comprehend. But without thinking about it, I swore that I would always be with her. I could tell by the innocence in her eyes that it was a promise she intended for me to keep. After taking a couple popsicles from the freezer, JJ and I went back to playing. I showed her my back yard and pointed to my room. I knew better than to take her up there, as my parents didn't like having anyone upstairs unless they had a chance to tidy up first. That is everyone except for my mom's friend the cop. She could go up any time. Eventually, it got to be dinner time. JJ and I had played together for most of the day, and I really felt as if we were a team of two. I didn't want the day to end, but eventually my parents came out of the Jenkins's house with JJ's parents in tow. They told us to say our good-byes as it was dinner time for both families. JJ said OK, but then pulled me around the corner of the house. She somehow managed to look angelic and sly at the same time when she asked, "Did you like me naked?" I was completely unprepared for the question. I knew she had seen me looking at her naked the previous night, but I just assumed from her reaction that it hadn't really clicked what I was doing. But now it was apparent that she was well aware that I had looked over her body. "Um... yeah... you looked really cute," was all I could respond. "Thanks," she said, and kissed me on the cheek. The feeling was unimaginable. With all of the intimate touching I had done with Julia, JJ's kiss did more to excite. I felt the tickle in my wee-wee again. JJ took me by the hand and started to lead me back around the house. Just before the corner she stopped. Looking back at me, she asked, "Can you sleep with a light on?" "Yeah, I guess so," I replied to what I thought was a weird question. "Good," JJ replied, seeming strangely excited. "I always sleep with one on. If you sleep with one on too, we can see that the other one is there. I'd really like that." I smiled back at her and said that I'd like that too, even though it seemed a little strange. However, that made her smile even more. As she led me the rest of the way around the house she whispered, "You can look in on me any time you want." -- end chapter 2-- I always appreciate feedback. If you really like, really hate, or can see some improvements to my stories, send feedback to secretdcguy@hotmail.com