____________________________ | | /)| KRISTEN'S BOOKSHELF |(\ / )| DIRECTORIES |( \ __( (|____________________________|) )__ ((( \ \ > /_) ( \ < / / ))) (\\\ \ \_/ / \ \_/ / ///) \ / \ / \ _/ \_ / / / \ \ o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o The Bookshelf Directories offer a very wide variety o o of stories. They have been submitted by people from o o all over the world. Also from alt.sex.stories (News o o groups). There is no particular order other than o o offering them to you in alphabetical directories. o o o o All works are copyrighted to the author and may not o o be used for profit without obtaining the author's o o permission in advance. o o o o Lest we forget!!! This story was produced as adult o o entertainment and should not be read by minors. o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o Always With Me - 1 by Secret DC Guy (secretdcguy@hotmail.com) *** After getting caught watching his teenage babysitter masturbating, young Brian Shaffer is tricked into being used as her toy. When they are finally caught, his heart is broken. But things change when a new kid moves in next door. (Fb, preteen, ped, nc, 1st, mast, oral, voy, rom) *** Author's Note: This story is for the exclusive use of the author. It may be reposted as on free websites or free sections of pay websites with the permission of the author. *** Chapter 1: The Kid Next Door I really didn't know how to feel as the moving van pulled away from the house next door. I was barely six years old, having just turned that past Tuesday, June 10, but I felt like the love of my life had left. True, she was older, but that didn't change how I felt about her. Julia Rossi was more than just my babysitter. We had had a great time together over the past year, genuinely in love. Admittedly, until last summer our relationship had been the standard babysitter/ward relationship. However, one night in August, after my parents got home from their monthly night out, I was sitting in my room unable to sleep. Julia and I had been rough-housing and cuddling all evening, so I was revved up. But, as often happened, going from an evening of immeasurable fun to sitting alone in my room made me feel bored and lonely, wishing I could still be cuddling with the beautiful 17 year old girl who took care of me. Our bedrooms faced each other, and I wanted to see her again so much. It was a warm evening, so my window was open and my blinds up. Summers in northern Pennsylvania were much cooler in 1980, so we didn't have air conditioning in our house. Julia's window was open as well, so I looked across the narrow side yards hoping to see her one last time. I ended up getting to see much more than I would have expected. When she came into her room, Julia was already wearing a long night shirt. It was really just a long beat-up t- shirt, but she looked beautiful in it. Her straight dark brown hair fell below her shoulders contrasting with her light skin. She was really skinny and not particularly tall, but she had a really big chest. I didn't know why, but I knew that was a good thing. Some nights when my parents got home from a night out, always a bit drunk, my father would stare at Julia's chest with a big smile on his face. She either didn't notice, or pretended not to, and would leave after getting paid. My mother would always chide my dad about being so obvious, though always ending by telling him that he understood because Julia's chest had the same effect on her. At first Julia just walked around her room a little, fiddling with stuff here and there. Eventually, she picked up her hair brush and sat on her bed going through what I figured was her normal evening routine. After a few minutes of brushing her hair, she turned on her bedside light and turned off the overhead light. As she lay back on the bed, Julia picked up a thick paperback book that seemed really worn, as if a lot of people had read it before she did. After a few minutes of reading it intently, I saw her hand rubbing what looked like the top of her leg. She didn't appear to be paying attention to anything other than the book, as her hand slowly pulled the night shirt up so I could see her underwear. It wasn't the same cotton stuff my mom wore-- I saw hers in the laundry when I pulled my stuff out to fold. Instead they were pink and lacy. They contrasted with the beat-up t-shirt, but looked really pretty. As she continued to read, Julia's hand started to rub between the top of her legs. When I rubbed my wee-wee it felt really good, but I also knew girls didn't have wee- wees. I wondered if they had something else that made them feel good. After a few more minutes, Julia's hand slid under her panties and began to move more deliberately. Her eyes closed and she put the book down. Suddenly, she stopped. She sat up fully and took off her shirt. Then rolling to her back she slipped off her underwear. I was shocked, since I had never seen a girl without any clothes on before. Even my mother would keep her door closed if she were changing her clothing. Naked, Julia looked more beautiful than she had ever looked before. I especially noticed her chest, which looked as attractive as my father and mother made it out to be. Most surprisingly, though, I saw a patch of hair right above where her wee-wee would be, though of course she didn't have one. I had seen my dad naked and knew guys had hair there, but I didn't know girls did. Julia lay fully back on her bed and started to touch herself just below the hair. Something down there must have made her feel good, because her eyes closed again and she her mouth opened. When I strained to hear if she were making any sounds, it sounded a little bit like she was crying. However, her face had a smile, so I knew it wasn't. After a few minutes her body started moving strangely. All of a sudden she grabbed a pillow with one hand and put it over her face. All the time she kept moving her other hand. Then suddenly she arched her back for what seemed like an hour, and collapsed back onto her bed. At this point, I was so interested that I had my face pressed against the window screen. That wasn't such a good idea because when Julia sat back up, she looked straight into my eyes. A look of panic came over her face, and she rolled off the bed out of sight. In a few seconds, I saw her hand reach up on the bed and grab her night shirt and panties. Obviously, I had embarrassed Julia, something I felt bad about doing. I watched for another minute or two, but she didn't come back into sight. Sitting at the window, I felt something had changed, thought I didn't know what it was. I just knew that I needed to apologize because I didn't want her to stop being my babysitter. When she didn't come back, I lay back on my bed, and cried. I don't know how long it was, but it felt like forever, when I heard Julia whispering between the houses. I knelt up on my bed and looked over at her. She said she had heard me crying and wanted to apologize for overreacting. Before I could say that I wanted to apologize too, she asked me if I thought she was pretty when she was naked. I told her that she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, trying to sound as sincere as I could. The smile that appeared on her face was unbelievable. She told me not to tell anyone what I had seen and she would give me a better view the next time she came over. Two weeks later, my parents had just left the house, when Julia led me up to my room. It was the typical young boy room, with superhero posters on the wall. I had always been a bit ashamed to have Julia up there, as she was older, but she always said it was cute--just as cute as me. Julia closed the door behind us, and then closed my blinds, saying that she didn't want anyone besides me to see her. When she took off all of her clothing, she told me to do the same. It felt weird being naked with a girl in the room, exciting and embarrassing at the same time. I kind of liked the feeling. Seeing Julia in person made her look so much more beautiful than she had when I saw her from my window. As I stared at her, she smiled and told me to touch her where ever I wanted. Based on what I heard my father and mother say about her chest, I decided to start there. It made her smile. After a few minutes she told me to suck on her nipples, which seemed strange. Why would she want me to suck on a part of her body? Only a few years before, my parents had gotten me to stop sucking on my thumb. After a few minutes of that, Julia took my hand and put it between her legs. Where her wee-wee would have been, she had a hole. It was wet and kind of slimy. I had only touched it for a second though, when she moved my hand to the top of the opening. There was a big bump, that she started rubbing my fingers against. When she let go of my hand, I kept going. She must have liked it because she started moaning, and telling me how great of a kid I was. After a few minutes she asked me to do something that shocked me. After stroking my face and telling me that she loved me, she asked me to lick the bump. I was scared, knowing how slimy she felt down there, but knowing that Julia loved me made me want to do anything for her. So, cautiously, I got between her legs. I was surprised. The slimy stuff actually tasted good. I couldn't describe it, but I enjoyed it a lot. Julia coached me in what to do, and after a few minutes she was rocking her hips and moaning. After a few more minutes, she started to scream, arched her back, then took in a deep breath and held it. When she calmed down, she sat up and kissed me on the lips. We lay on my bed for a long time with Julia telling me that she could get into trouble if I told anyone about our new game. I promised I wouldn't. Then smiling, she said we could do it again. We kept playing our game over the fall and winter, and I couldn't have been happier. Every time we finished, Julia told me she loved me, just not like my mom and dad loved me. She loved me like a girl loved a boy. I had no idea what that meant, but it made me feel special. Disaster struck on New Year's Eve. My parents were supposed to be out late, so Julia was going to spend the night in our guest room. As soon as they were out of the driveway, we went up to my room. Because they were going to be out until after Julia and I were both asleep, we didn't even bother to close the door. We had played our game once and were in the middle of playing it again, when I heard my mother scream. Looking out into the hall, I saw her, my father, and a friend of my mother who was the only woman on the local police force. I don't know why they were home so early, but I could see anger in both of my parents' faces. Their friend on the other hand walked calmly to the bed and gently pulled me up. She handed me off to my mother and told my father to call Julia's parents. As my mother walked me out of the room and across the hall to hers, I could hear Julia crying. I sat in my parents' room for several hours watching TV until I fell asleep. Before I did though, I heard a conversation going on downstairs. It was heated and once or twice I heard my father shouting. However, as the National Anthem played while whatever channel I was watching signed off the air, I drifted to sleep. Sometime in the night, I remember my father picking me up and carrying me back to my room. As I started to fall back to sleep, I heard my mother saying that she hope they could all pick up where they left off--whatever that meant. The next morning, my mother and father sat down and gave me the 'good touch, bad touch' talk. I was really confused because they said that certain touching was only for a person you were in love with. But when I said that I loved Julia and Julia loved me, they just told me that what Julia did was wrong and that she would never hurt me again. I didn't feel hurt and said so. But my parents wouldn't listen. Finally, the conversation came down to the fact that Julia was more than 10 years older than me, and I didn't know what I was doing. That part had been true, but instead of telling them that Julia was teaching me, I just said I understood. When I asked if Julia would be babysitting me anymore, my mother hugged me and said no. When I started to cry, my mother just stroked my hair and told me everything would be OK. She said that it would take some time, but I would get over the pain Julia caused me. Apparently, she didn't understand why I was crying. The next day, Julia was gone. Word around the neighborhood was that her father was moving for work and that she had gone ahead to get a full half-year at the new school. People said she was staying with an aunt or something. Some part of it must have been true, because a week later a 'For Sale' sign went up on her parents' house. It took a while for the house to sell, but then a month before school ended in June a 'Sold' sign went up. Now a week before school ended Julia's parents were gone. It hit me that I would really never see her again, when a house painter's van pulled up. They were there to cover up any trace of Julia that might be left. *** The next week was a blur. At the same time the school year was ending, I watched workmen come in and out of the house next door. According to my mother, they were making some quick repairs, painting, and putting in new carpets before the new family moved in. My mother didn't know much about them other than the fact that they had one child about my age. As an only child, I thought that I might at least end up with a new person to play with. When I asked my mother if it was a boy or girl, she said that she didn't know. Saturday morning, I sat in my window watching movers carrying boxes and furniture out of a large truck and into the house. I didn't see the kid, only a tough looking man directing the move. I figured it must be the new kid's father, but when I asked if I could go introduce myself, my father stopped me saying that I should let them get settled first. So I went back up to my room and spent the day watching the movers out of the front window of my room. It was about 5:30 when the moving van finally pulled away. The guy who had been organizing the move pulled a pickup truck into the driveway and went inside. After maybe an hour, he came back outside and sat on the porch drinking a beer and waiting. Finally, an hour later, as the evening shadows began to stretch over the neighborhood, a car pulled in behind the pickup truck. The father got up, and almost seemed to skip over to the car. While a woman got out of the driver's seat, the kid got out of the passenger's side back. I strained my eyes trying to see what the kid looked like, and figure out if it was a boy or girl. At first it was hard to tell, as the kid had reddish blonde hair that was too long to be a boy's cut but too short to be a girl's. I had heard the cut referred to as a 'page boy'. However, when the kid pulled a baseball glove and a Baltimore Oriels cap out of the car, I guessed the kid was a boy. When I looked more closely it made sense, as he was also wearing a Washington Redskins shirt and beat up jeans. A smile came to my face as I thought that even though I lost Julia, I would have someone to do little boy things with. We could play catch, ride bicycles, and maybe walk along the railroad tracks if our parents weren't watching. I lost the love of my life, but at least I was going to get a new friend out of it. I must have been pretty obvious sitting in the window, staring down at the new kid because he saw me and waved. When I saw his face, my heart fluttered. He had the most angelic smile. I couldn't tell much more from up there, but I knew there was something special about this boy. I didn't want to be just fiends with him, I wanted more. I had no idea what that meant, but I knew being friends with him wouldn't be enough. I wanted to always be with him. I wanted to touch his face and even kiss him. When the thought of kissing him entered my mind, I panicked. I knew that boys were supposed to kiss girls, not other boys. There had to be something wrong with me. I didn't know what it was, but I knew I had to tell someone. I thought my mom might understand, so I waved back to the kid and ran downstairs to find her. When I found her I cried, "Mom, there's something wrong with me." She had been putting the supper plates in the dishwasher, but stopped and gazed at me with the most compassionate look. "What's wrong, Brian?" she asked. "Mom, I saw the new kid, and I think he's beautiful. I even want to kiss him," I sobbed. "Brian, it's hard to understand you when you're crying," she said coming over and hugging me. "But it sounds like you're feeling some grownup stuff. It's going to be fine. Feelings like that are natural. I never thought your father and I would have to have 'the talk' with you while you were so young. But Julia did some things to you that mean you'll have to grow up early. I can't say that these kinds of feelings are easy, but we just have to deal with them. You'll have them for the rest of your life, so you might as well learn about them now. Let's give you a bath and after a good night's sleep your father and I will talk with you tomorrow morning. Deal?" I nodded my head and headed back up the stairs with my mother behind me. I didn't feel any better though. *** It was probably about 8:30 when my mother finally left my room. I didn't want to go to bed, but she insisted that it was past my bedtime. We finally made an unspoken agreement that she would turn the light off and leave, while I pretended to go to sleep. As soon as the door closed, I was at the side window looking between the houses. Just like I used to sit and watch the love of my life, I was now watching for the new kid. My feelings were confused, every time I thought about him, I got the same feeling I got when I thought about Julia. I wanted to hold him and cuddle with him. I knew boys shouldn't think about other boys like that, but I just had to see him again tonight. Soon my waiting paid off. The new kid walked into the room wearing a robe. His hair looked wet, so I figured he had just gotten out of the bath as well. His smile was just as beautiful as it had been when he was down by the car. It made me feel warm inside. Apparently, the new kid's parents didn't put him to bed anymore because his father and mother came into the room kissed him. After turning on his bedside lamp, they turned off the overhead-light. From my window I could see that his bed was along the wall directly across from my window. Next to it was a dresser, which the kid opened and got out a pair of pajamas. They were a simple t-shirt and shorts pair, but the pattern seemed strange. It almost looked like there were flowers on them. I didn't know any boys who like to wear flower patterns. My puzzlement turned to shock when the new kid let the robe drop to the ground. All of a sudden I was staring at the boy's back and butt, and my heart was beating faster. I had seen other boys naked in the showers in the swim club locker room, but this boy didn't look anything like them. I had heard my parents talking about people having heart attacks, and I figured I was about to have one. Without putting on his pajamas I saw him start to look around the room. Suddenly, the new kid turned around and saw me. I froze, knowing that I had been caught looking watching somebody through that window again. However, instead of looking embarrassed, the kid simply started to excitedly wave at me. My mind started to swirl. I want to jump between the houses to be with this kid, so that I could hug him and kiss him. I had never had a feeling like that before, not even for Julia. People had told me about crushes before, and I knew that this was my first. It might be on a boy, but I knew that somehow I needed to be with this kid forever. I also felt something I had never felt before. For some reason my wee-wee began to feel tickly and get hard. It had done the latter before, but the tickly feeling was new. I felt compelled to look over the kid's body. As my eyes scanned down, I notice something. He didn't have a wee-wee. The new kid was a girl! I couldn't think about this anymore tonight. Within a few hours, I had replaced Julia, the love of my life, with a crush on a boy, only to find out the boy was a girl. My brain shut down. It was all that I could do to smile and wave back to the girl then flop back into my bed. I closed my eyes and almost immediately fell asleep. -- end chapter 1-- I always appreciate feedback. If you really like, really hate, or can see some improvements to my stories, send feedback to secretdcguy@hotmail.com