The August 2004 Silver Clitorides Awards The Presentation August. Such a tawdry month. Always warm, moist, ready to blow you away, anywhere, anytime. Sticky. You can't trust August. Full of depression. Tropical depression, mostly - and moistly. You gotta grab what you can when you can, because there's no telling if you'll have the power for it later. August is a bitch. August is the eighth month of the year in the Gregorian Calendar, with 31 days. Named in honor of Augustus Caesar. The month has 31 days because Augustus wanted as many days as Julius Caesar's July. Augustus placed the month where it is because that's when Cleopatra died. Before Augustus renamed August, it was called Sextilis in Latin, since it was the sixth month in the Roman calendar which started in March. See? Even Auggie knew it was a tawdry month. What could you expect from a month named sextilis? It's hard to find a redeeming trait for August. July... July has Independence Day for US'ns and Canadians. September has a day to celebrate the dignity of the working man. Just try to get an extra day off on an August weekend, and listen to your employer guffaw. It's gonna cost you some of your hard earned vacation time. Who loves August? Your electric companies even have mixed feelings. Oh, sure, the accounts receivable departments, sitting in their air- conditioned offices, is chortling gleefully as their customers' electric meters are whirring like the extra fans you have to stick in your window or blowing across the bed just to avoid heat prostration, never mind braving the heat and sweat to actually make love, and the kids are still on their vacations and wide awake in the next room because they can't sleep in the gawdorville heat and humidity, either. Yeah, August is great for accountants and nerdy office types. Try being a lineman for the county, or even the meter- reader who has to go out in that heat! Who else loves August? Well, readers for one, at a guess. They managed to find something to take their minds off the swelter outside and kindle a fire in their pants instead. Two somethings, based on the voting this month. Yeah, we got us another tie. So, without further complaint about the weather, let's get to the one... two good things about August: "The winners of Silver Clitorides Awards for best stories of the month of August, 2004 are Kevin and Keli - The LHS Ski Trip by SunShowerGurl and Never Any Excuse by Uncle Sky. Congratulations, Megan. Congratulations, Uncle Sky. And let me congratulate all the authors and finalists." /~sunshowergurl/stories/kk_skitrip_v1.pdf /files/Authors/uncle_sky/Never_Any_Excuse/ Story Author Month Status Foreshadow Number 6 August, 2004 finalist Kevin and Keli - The LHS Ski Trip SunShowerGurl August, 2004 winner The Lottery Dark Vision August, 2004 incomplete Never Any Excuse Uncle Sky August, 2004 winner Next Sunday parthenogenesis August, 2004 finalist Once More With Feelings Night Hawk August, 2004 incomplete En Plein Coeur de la Nuit Richard Packer August, 2004 finalist Riptides Souvie August, 2004 finalist Spitfire and Messerschmitt Gina Marie Wylie August, 2004 incomplete For links to these stories, go to /~Clitorides/SCA_Archive_D.htm#0408