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From: Andrew Roller <roller666@earthlink.net>
Subject: FUCK DECENCY 344 Dungeon of Desire NND g2
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Andrew Roller Presents
FUCK DECENCY
Sponsored by: Crab the dog
Issue No. 344
Naughty Naked Dreamgirls in
Dungeon of Desire
Chapter Four
We sprayed each other with a hose on the grass and then soaped
up with a bar Miriam gave us. She begged us to hurry. Her lover was
coming soon. We washed and rinsed and then she took us inside and gave
us innocuous cotton shorts and t-shirts to wear. In the mid-day sun it
would look best if we left her place looking modest. Especially since
some of us were still underage, quite underage in my case.
In her ballroom we dressed. It was quiet and there was not a
trace of last night’s festivities. It was a genteel ballroom, just big
enough for small dances and entertainments. Now it looked more like a
living room. The pee pool gurgled in one corner, but potted plants had
been arranged around it, shrouding it. Miriam knew its secrets and
perhaps she did not want to remind herself of them in the daylight’s
quiet, modest hours.
NAKED AT THE NEWSSTAND
by holy joe
I have noticed an interesting correlation. The more laws this
country passes, the more porn I buy. Back in the 70’s, there were no
laws at all (relative to today). So, at most, I’d buy just Playboy in
any given month. After all, I didn’t want to sit home jacking off, when
I could (theoretically) meet a girl who liked me!
By 1998, of course, meeting girls is illegal. We live in a
feminist-dominated society, where all you can ever associate with is
women. Since I’ve never had a girlfriend, I’m not interested in having
a woman friend. That would be like beginning a boxing career by
fighting Mike Tyson.
So, instead, I buy porn. (With women in it -- what a ripoff!)
Today I went to Tower Books. I went there to buy one
magazine. Mayfair, which sometimes has reasonably youthful women in
it.
Did I buy Mayfair? Sure. But I also bought 13 other porno
magazines.
Before I went to Tower, I told myself (knowing I might buy more
than Mayfair): “Joe, don’t spend all your money.”
I spent all my money. In fact, I had to stand outside Tower
Books for two hours, panhandling, because I spent all the money I’d
brought and needed more. When I finally got enough money, I had to make
three separate trips because I couldn’t carry all the porn I was buying
in one trip.
So, what did I buy, this month?
Playboy, March 1998, $4.95. Web: http://www.playboy.com
Review: There are only a few worthwhile photos in this issue,
but they are great! Most of them are in a swimsuit pictorial. In one
photo, a bare-bottomed blonde helps her three bikinied friends untie
their suits. What a lovely bottom the blonde has! I’ve never seen such
a great bottom. It is small and very round. On the same page as the
blonde, there is a brunette. She’s not wearing a bra. She has lovely
naked bosoms that hang down as she bends forward to undo another girl’s
swimsuit.
In another photo in the swimsuit pictorial, three girls go
running into the surf. It’s really nice seeing their naked bosoms
bounce as they run with carefree abandon into the water. In another
photo, they ditch adult worries to build a sandcastle. Finally, they
smear sand all over each other’s bare breasts.
If you’ve never seen Playmate Erika Eleniak, you’re in for a
treat. Playboy reprints a photo of her lying in bed with her bare,
upturned ass pointing at the camera. As she gazes back at you, she
contemplatively sucks her finger.
Penthouse, March 1998, 5.99. Web: http://www.penthousemag.com
Review: It’s back to ‘business as usual’ for this magazine. I
was hoping for another terrific issue featuring a girl (almost) too
young to be photographed. No such luck. Instead we get some damn woman
-- you guessed it -- spreading her cunt! Someone should give Bob
Guccione an award for taking the most pictures of boring women
inflicting their boring cunts on the viewer.
I mean, have you ever seen a photo like this? The woman is
sitting down. On the floor. She’s facing you. As she stares at you
with a distinct lack of innocence (or enthusiasm), she uses her fingers
to spread W-I-D-E her cunt.
Fortunately, this issue is redeemed by a fantastic “Click”
comic. In this comic a young, innocent girl gets her bottom reamed.
Ahhhhh!
Sport, $1.95. No web site listed.
Review: My God! I almost died when I saw this magazine. I
had to pinch myself to make sure I was still alive, and living in
feminist America.
This magazine isn’t technically a porno magazine. It’s a
sports magazine. This is their swimsuit issue. But it’s not a boring
swimsuit issue, like Sports Illustrated puts out. Far from it!
Take a look at the cover: A blonde, in a bikini, blows a
bubble with bubblegum as she prepares to throw a pitch in a “Fantasy
Baseball” game.
The pictorial itself is even hotter. The blonde pitcher puts
on a skimpier bikini. Girls gaze with glamorous innocence from the
dugout. An umpire too frail to do anything useful tries her best.
Another girl practises “sliding into home” by sunning herself in the
grass. And, finally, a slender young babe in a teensy bikini tries to
figure out how to throw a ball.
That’s my kind of team!
Photo, $6.50. (From France. Available at Tower Books.)
Review: As soon as I saw the young babe on the cover of this
issue, I grabbed it. This is a photography magazine. Sometimes it
features nude photos.
Devouring this issue, I came upon what I was looking for. Turn
to page 36. A shockingly young girl leans back and soaks up the sun.
How wonderful she looks! A perfect face, long brown hair, ripe naked
breasts. And, as young as she is, you know she has a great
personality. She’s probably dreaming about bubblegum.
Ocean Drive, $3.95.
Review: This is a dumb ladies’ magazine, but this issue has a
great cover! Model Claudia Schiffer poses in a liquid-thin gown. It’s
low cut, and reveals her fragile bare shoulders as well as the curves of
her breasts.
Penthouse, $7.25. (From France. Available at Tower Books. No month
listed -- it’s the issue with two blondes on the cover.)
Review: I like buying the French Penthouse each month because
it always has a ‘sex toys’ section. In America, sex toys amount to
little more than plastic crap. But the French know how to make very
classy sex toys. The toy I liked best this issue was a brass
‘penis-band.’ (For lack of a better description. The text is in
French, and I can’t read it!)
Imagine your cock is hard. Then, a female picks up an
armband-type thing. It’s made of brass. It has intricate clasps on
it. She puts it around your dick. She locks the clasps. It’s not as
long as your dick, so you’re walking around with something rather like
an armband on your dick. A ‘penis-band’! Attached to the penis band is
a brass ring. A chain can be passed through it, so you can be led
around by your penis.
In addition to the penis-band, there is also a bridle. This is
made of leather. It comes complete with a bit for the mouth. It also
has reins. It even has blinders, to keep your love from looking where
he or she isn’t supposed to. Also featured are a pair of handcuffs, and
a whip with a dildo for a handle. There’s also a weird thing that
apparently fits on the clitoris.
“Susan and Joseph” is a pictorial you may have seen before in
the American Penthouse. However, in reprinting this pictorial, the
French have used different photos. There are some very cute photos of
Susan fishing. There’s also an excellent photo of her screaming as
Joseph rams his tongue up her ass.
Page 8 serves up an even rarer treat. There are excerpts from
pictorials printed in other Penthouses, in other countries. Feast your
eyes on a photo of a gorgeous brunette as she’s made to bend way over
and stick her hands and head in a pillory.
Club International, March 1998, $5.99.
Review: Penny for penny, this is the best issue this month.
As soon as you see the cover, you know it’s got to be great: It shows a
brunette wearing a lace neck band, with a tiny black bow on it. She’s
also wearing lace wrist bands, decorated with black bows. And she’s got
on black fishnet stockings. Otherwise, she’s nude. Whipped cream,
messily applied, covers her private parts.
In her pictorial, the brunette daubs whipped cream on her
tongue. As she savors the taste of the cream, she squirts more on her
nipples. Inserted in her pictorial is a smaller, separate magazine.
It’s titled: “Butt Sluts: Horny Babes Who Love Hard Anal Action.” It
features a great cover of a blonde bending over, her panties pulled down
to expose her rear. In this smaller issue is the hottest photo I’ve
ever seen of Jenna and Janine. Jenna lies on a shag carpet, a
strange-looking dildo unwrapped beside her on the floor, as Janine
prepares her rectum for penetration. The most amazing thing in the
photo, though, is Jenna’s boots. They are long and black and stretch
almost to the tops of her thighs. But they have the knees cut away, as
well as the portions along the front of her thighs, so that she can bend
her legs more easily.
Farther back in this smaller magazine, you can see what happens
when a girl goes too far at a party. Her mini-pictorial is titled
“All-Nite Filler.” The girl’s friends challenge her to accept a cherry
in her ass. (Since, after all, she’s a virgin.) Feeling silly, but
bold from drinking too much, she accepts their dare. They stick a
cherry up her butt. Then they leave.
“I can’t get it out!” the girl screams. She spends the rest of
the night trying to get it to pop out of her bottom. You can enjoy her
distress as you see her pry her bottomcheeks wide apart in a vain
attempt to dislodge the fruit. She also tries masturbating. It’s no
use, but in the morning one of her friends makes a call to holy joe’s
roto-rooter service. I get her unclogged, then show her what else can
go up her butt.
(I wish!)
Now back to the main magazine:
In the pictorial “Claudia and Jennifer,” Claudia wears a
micro-miniskirt to work. Her skirt is so short that her panties can be
seen peeking out from under it! Her boss, Jennifer, decides to punish
her for being so wanton in her attire. Claudia is forced to lift her
skirt, lower her panties and (apparently) piss on the floor in front of
her boss, with her panties around her ankles. I sure hope Claudia
learned her lesson, because I did -- don’t rub your dick while looking
at young ladies peeing on the floor! This is the best ‘panty pictorial’
I’ve ever seen.
But there’s more!
In “Permanent Hard-on Mr. Flint,” a girl goes to the doctor.
This pictorial is very, very hot. There’s a combination of caring,
love, intimate exploring, and sucking and fucking. All the while,
gleaming in the background, is razor-sharp surgical gear. The
combination of tenderness and (the potential for) extreme agony is
explosive. I got a painful hard-on just looking! In fact, this
pictorial gave me a major problem. I looked at it just as I realized I
didn’t have enough money to buy all the porn I wanted. So I spent the
next two hours standing outside Tower Books, panhandling, with a big
erection in my pants. You can imagine the looks I got.
Thankfully, I did manage to buy this issue. Because there’s
even more great stuff in it!
“Teri” begins her pictorial by yanking down her panties and
showing off her wonderful bottom. A series of no-holes-barred photos
follows.
On page 83, two blondes kneel in ocean surf that rises to the
level of their pussies. One of them reaches around and playfully
masturbates the other. Then they go ashore, peel off their bikinis, and
take an intimate shower together.
“Shake it Baby!” features the prettiest strippers I’ve ever
seen. They’re photographed doing various naughty things: playing in a
baby pool, putting fruit where it doesn’t belong, and wrapping their
panties around a customer’s head!
The magazine ends with a pictorial titled “Christina and
Nathan.” Christina is a small, lovely young girl who likes wearing long
black boots. Nathan has a penis. Christina poses very sexily as Nathan
puts his penis into her tightest places. There is a small silver chain
around Christina’s neck, making her look as if she’s Nathan’s pet. She
also has a silver chain around one of her wrists. It’s hard to describe
how wonderful this pictorial is. Christina is a mixture of enthusiasm
and vulnerability. She truly looks like the girl next door, straying
for her very first time into sex. (And wild, no-holds barred sex, at
that!)
As you can see, I haven’t even gotten around to reviewing
Mayfair. That’s the magazine I went to Tower to buy, but, having bought
it, I haven’t yet had a chance to open it.
Hopefully nobody reading this review will spend time buying and
reading porn when they could be with their family...
PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE FORMS
“HOLINESS PARTY”
Las Vegas, NEVADA (UP) - Presidential candidate holy joe told
reporters today that he’s forming a “holiness party.”
“I intend to fill the moral vacuum left by our president,” joe
told reporters. “Previously, I was head of the cocktail party, but we
suffered a loss of participants back in 1987, and disbanded. Hence,
today, I am forming the first political party in America dedicated 100
percent to holiness,” joe said.
“Every morning we will sing ‘Nearer My God to Thee,” joe said.
“This is because, with our dedication to holiness, we are every day
travelling closer to God, and away from Satan. Also, we’re getting
older, every day.
“In addition, in my party, we will bathe every week, because
cleanliness is next to godliness,” joe said. “We will pray between
baths, which means that, either bathing, or praying, we won’t have time
to be tempted by offerings of oral sex from White House interns.
“Everything will be very, very holy in my White House, when I’m
president,” joe assured reporters. “Even my socks and underpants will
be holy. In fact, they’re holy right now, which proves I’m the best
choice to lead America into a (brand) spanking new millennium.
“And I will never lie to you,” joe continued. “If I fail in my
holiness in any way, I will confess immediately, in prime time, telling
you how I failed, in graphic and unflinching detail.
“Finally, there will be no more 21-year-old interns in the
White House,” joe said. “Instead of ex-college loo(insky’s) who know
how to give blow jobs, we will have only virgins at the White House,”
joe said. “100 percent virgin interns, for a 100 percent holy
president.”
Democrats and Republicans, hearing joe’s speech, tried to punch
holes in it, but were unsuccessful.
AND IN THE END...
California:
YOUR TAX DOLLARS AT WORK
Signed into law by Governor Pete Wilson in 1997, SB 389
designates “San Joaquin soil” as the official state dirt.
- LPC Monthly, January 1998, pg. 9. Web: http://www.ca.lp.org/
-------------------------- Fuck Decency! ------------------------
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- JOIN the world’s greatest organization! Send $35.00 to The North
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NAMBLA, P.O. Box 174, Midtown Station, New York, NY 10018.
-Naughty Naked Dreamgirls (Library of Congress ISSN: 1070-1427) is
copyright 1998 and a trademark of Andrew Roller. Work by others
copyright 1998 by the respective copyright holder.
-END OF 344 EMISSION Celebrate Pedophile Heritage Month at the White
House!
Signed into law by Governor Pete Wilson in 1997, SB 390
designates “Standard American” as the official state toilet.
--
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