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From: tigger@alices.com (Tigger)
Subject: RP TG: A Change of Direction (6/22) (Magic, TG)
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A Change of Direction
Part 6
by Tigger Copyright 1997, all rights reserved.

Archiving/publication of this author's work on any system that
requires payment in any form is prohibited by the author and
is in violation of my copyright to Chapters 7 and beyond. No archiving
or redistribution of this work is permitted without this copyright
attribution included, intact and complete, in the posting/archiving. 

A Change in Direction
Chapter 12

Excerpt from the Journal of Miss Jacqui Donovan

48 days A. T.

First round of school tests are scheduled for next week and
Bonnie is really worried about them.  Mum said she could stay
over at our house this weekend so we can study together and I
can help her get ready for them.  She says it will be like a
mini-slumber party.  Slumber party?  What do I do at a slumber
party?

It may be my imagination, but I think Bonnie has become a
little quieter, a little less chattery of late.  I like the
change.

Anyway, she is going to sleep over from Friday night till
Monday morning.  She is going to share *my* bed.  Jack is
going crazy.  Here, we are going to be in same bed with this
gorgeous, sexy and voluptuous woman and we can't do anything
about it.

Well, I guess there are things that we could do.  I remember
that magazine that made the rounds last year in the locker
room.  It showed two women getting it on together without
guys.  

Yeah.  I think that could be pretty nice, now that I remember
that.  So, am I (Jacqui) a lesbian or is Jack still straight? 
I don't think I want to know.  Of course, if I ever slip up
and make it with a guy, then the same question gets asked the
other way around, doesn't it?

Oops. Jack just went into his hidey-hole, again.  Chicken!

She sure is cuddly-looking.  Even if nothing else happens, it
will be nice to snuggle up against her. 

End Journal Entry.

***********
"Mum?"  Laurie looked up from her coffee and morning paper to
look at her daughter.  She fought to keep the hope out of her
eyes, and waited for her daughter to respond now that she had
her Mother's attention.  "What *do* girls do at slumber
parties?"

"Well, darling, I can't really say.  I never had one.  The
first time I associated with girls as a girl was after I went
to college.  The closest I can come is when we used to stay up
late in the dorm.  Besides, I thought you were going to study.
What did you do when you have had friends over here for the
night?"

"Talked about girls, Mum."  The tone was disgusted and Laurie
fought back a grin, knowing that it would damage their slowly
improving rapport.

"As I recall, we talked about boys.  It was one way I learned
some of the things birth-girls already knew about them.  I
just knew about the boy side of things and how boys felt.  It
was nice to learn the girl side of things before I had to deal
with a boy on my own."

"Well, I don't think that is in the cards for me, Mum." Jacqui
thought of the boys who had used to be Jack's friends and how
they had treated her since school had started.  Then she
thought of Bonnie.  "I may be a girl now, but I am still
attracted to girls."

"I understand, luv.  I did not opt to have my personality and
mind set changed during my Transformation, either.  But the
power of sex is great and you may find yourself changing your
mind in time.  As for being attracted to girls, that is to be
expected, and I see nothing wrong with it.  Girls are very
nice."  An altogether predatory and sexy grin lit her Mother's
face.  "Women are even nicer."

"Mother!"  Jacqui squawked. "You??!?"  The thought of her
Mother having sex was one thing, but...

"Yes, Jacqui.  I do enjoy sex and I enjoy it with both men and
other women.  In fact, during those first months after my
Transformation, I had an exclusive, monogamous relationship
with another woman.  It was wonderful.  I hope you find
someone just as wonderful."  Her voice dropped off as the
disappointment of not being that "someone" for her daughter
clawed at her, again.  Clearing her throat, she continued. 
"But that is up to you in the fullness of time. To answer your
earlier question, there are many things you can do - watch
television, eat, talk or sleep.  For goodness sake, Jacqui,
stop worrying about what "girls" do.  Try enjoying yourself.
This is not supposed to be punishment.  Do what feels like fun
when you are with other girls.  You might be surprised at the
things you learn and the things you like."

A tear glistened a single track down Jacqui's cheek. She
batted at it furiously, mentally damning the hormones that
kept her emotions so close to the surface. "Okay, Mum.  I will
try, but it is just so hard.  School is okay, so long as I
stick to the class work.  Besides Bonnie, I don't know how to
talk to the girls or the guys anymore.  "Hey, babe, wanna go
out for a burger?" doesn't seem to be right somehow, and the
guys talk around me or at me so much I could scream.  I don't
fit in anywhere except in the classroom.  I am becoming very
popular as a study partner or lab partner."  She grimaced at
that.

"Stop trying so hard." Laurie repeated slowly.  "You have a
friend who you like and who likes you.  You have people who
are willing to accept you on at least an academic level and
that is something you can build on.  And, I seem to see a real
improvement in your shooting."

Jacqui's hands moved to her bosom and cupped herself with a
smirk.  "I am learning how not to fall when these keep going
one way when my feet go another, and I have learned my new
range.  I am not strong enough for a twenty footer anymore,
but I am getting the hang of a ten-to-fifteen footer again.  I
guess I am going to be a guard and not a power forward. If I
make the team."

"You will.  I think you have made a lot of progress, dear. 
Really.  Your healing lessons are going very well, too.  You
have picked it up much faster than I did.  So, just take it
easy, okay?  Look, if you are worried about tonight, just let,
what is her name, Bonnie?  Let Bonnie take the lead." Taking a
huge chance, Laurie stood and went over to stand behind her
daughter.  She squeezed the girl's shoulders comfortingly and
leaned over to whisper into her ear.  "Just have fun."

Jacqui sighed and then leaned her head back into her Mother's
neck.  Gripping her mother's hands in her own, she smiled
wanly.  "I will try, Mom.  I will try."  Speaking of fun
reminded Jacqui of something.  "Mom?  Speaking of fun. . .
.girls play chess, don't they?"  The tone was wistfully
hopeful.

"Last time I checked, dear." Laurie laughed.  "Why?"

"Well, one of the things you . . . . put into storage for Jack
was my chess set.  I could still play on the computer, but I
liked moving and handling the chessmen when I played."

Laurie smiled gently. "You were the school district champion
last year, weren't you?"

A frown shuttered Jacqui's eyes and her voice lost its
vibrancy.  "Jack won the district championship, but Jack is no
longer with us.  I have not had the courage to go and see
whose name is engraved on the trophy in the school display
case."

Hurting for her child, Laurie embraced Jacqui and felt her
daughter lean harder into her.  "Your name, luv.  Jacqueline
Donovan.  You still won the championship, Jacqui.  I never
intended this Transformation to diminish you, sweetheart. 
Quite the opposite, in fact.  Every honor you ever won that I
could somehow shift to your new life is still yours.  Honest."

Jacqui just stood there, for a long, long time, letting
herself bask in her Mother's comforting embrace.  She had
missed it so much.  Finally, she spoke, her voice just a
little husky with emotion.  "So, uhhh, if I get a new chess
set, you won't put it into cold storage, too?"

Another little hug.  "No, love.  In fact, I will go looking
for one while you entertain your guest. My special treat,
okay?"

"Thanks, Mom." Her voice cracked that time.  Embarrassed by
the emotions she could not seem to control, Jacqui gave her
Mother a little kiss on the cheek, and then all but ran from
the room.

*************
Bonnie rode home from school that night in Jacqui's car.  A
picture of Jack bringing such a hot looking girl home to Mom
brought a bit of a smile to Jacqui's face.  Dinner was a
jovial occasion, with Bonnie keeping the conversation lively
and humorous.  Her presence did a lot to ease the remaining
tension between mother and Transformed daughter.  The three of
them made quick work of the after dinner clean up, but when
Jacqui suggested they start studying, Bonnie rebelled.

"Do we have to start tonight?  Can't we watch some TV, or go
for a walk, or *something*?  Isn't tomorrow soon enough for
you to crack the whip over my poor head?"

Jacqui pretended to consider.  "I don't know." she said
speculatively.  "Do you really think there is enough time this
weekend if we don't get on it right away?"

Bonnie's eyes went wide.  Playfully, she picked up the
decorative pillow from the couch she was seated on and pitched
it at Jacqui's head.  "BITCH!!" she spluttered, before falling
into a peel of giggles.  "No, I don't think we need to work
twenty four hours a day.  Besides, all work and no play makes
Jacqui a very dull girl and will make Bonnie crazy."

Settling the pillow down beside her and taking a very
dignified pose, Jacqui sniffed.  "Very well.  What *do* you
want to do, then?"

"I know, you can show me around the house and then we can go
up to your room and play dress-up.  I want to play with your
hair and makeup.  You never wear any and I have been itching
to see some on you."

Laurie, seated beside Bonnie on the couch, tried to look only
mildly interested as Jacqui dealt with Bonnie's idea. 
Actually, this was a key aspect of the agenda that she and
Bronwyn had worked up for this weekend.  Thus far, Jacqui had
studiously ignored the array of cosmetics that Laurie had left
for her the night after the Transformation.  This lesson was
one that Jacqui needed, but they had agreed that they would
not press it if she resisted strenuously.  But Laurie could
not help hoping.

Stunned by the idea, Jacqui had to resist refusing out of
hand.  Bonnie was her friend, and so far, her only friend. 
She did not want to offend her by declining to do something
she wanted to do, but still - to wear makeup?  Like a girl?

But you are a girl, a niggling thought taunted.  Swallowing,
she looked nervously at Bonnie.  "You. . . ummm .  think I
really need to wear makeup, Bonnie?" 

Bronwyn/Bonnie almost cheered, but instead let a very feminine
smile light up her face.  "Darling, nobody *needs* makeup. 
You *need* food.  You *need* air and water.  Cosmetics are
among the little extras that make life special.  They make you
look good and that makes you feel good."  Bonnie decided to
sink the hook by letting disappointment and a touch of hurt
creep into her voice.  "But, if you don't want to. . ."

Jacqui fell on the bait and took it down in one gulp. "No, no. 
It sounds like. . ."  She swallowed again and licked her dry
lips, "umm, fun."  Shock sent icy chills down her body as she
realized what she had just agreed to do with Bonnie.  Bonnie
and her Mother just sat there looking at her, waiting for her
to do. . . what?  Finally to fill in the gap in conversation,
Jacqui forced a smile and asked. "So, Bonnie. What do you want
to see first?  I know.  I will show you my library.  Yes, that
is perfect."

Surprised by that statement, Laurie forgot her decision to
remain silent and asked "Your library, Jacqui?  What is so
perfect about starting in your library?"

The smile on her daughter's face became blinding as she stood
up and hauled her friend to her feet.  "So Bonnie will know
the place of my retribution tomorrow if she gets too carried
away with this make-over plan of hers.  Come along, Bonnie,
let's go see my whips and chains. See you, Mum."

Bronwyn managed to shoot a look of triumph at Laurie before
she had to stagger after Jacqui to keep from falling as she
was dragged from the room bodily.  Laurie smiled softly at the
little victory.  She hoped it would work and that Jacqui would
start experimenting a little with her looks on her own. 
Hopefully, she would start taking a little feminine pride in
her appearance.  Maybe, just maybe, tomorrow, she'd see her
daughter in make up for the first time since that abortive
trip to the beautician.

A couple of hours later, Jacqui was sitting in front of her
vanity mirror, staring at herself and trying to sort out all
the feelings that were assailing her.  Confusion was a large
part of it, but there were also sizable pieces of pride and
even arousal in the mix, too.  Just to make sure she was not
dreaming, she closed her eyes and pinched herself hard. 
Nothing changed when she reopened her eyes.

The woman looking back from her mirror was someone Jacqui did
not know.  The hair she had taken to wearing in a ponytail
(because it was easy), had been teased into lion-mane
fullness.  It also seemed to change the shape of her head
completely.  Her face was different, too.  The colors that
Bonnie had chosen from that dizzying array of bottles and pots
were very subtle, yet very effective. Her eyes seemed larger
and more doe-like; her cheeks seemed higher and more shapely;
her lips seemed fuller and more pouty.

That was not all.  She was wearing a very silky, shorty
nightgown that Bonnie had found in a bag of clothes from that
marathon shopping trip.  Jacqui had hidden that bag in the
bottom of her bottom armoire drawer so she would not have to
look at it, but Bonnie had found it mere moments after they
had entered Jacqui's room.  Once she'd seen it, nothing else
in Jacqui's entire wardrobe had been satisfactory.  Lord,
Jacqui thought, I can see my nipples puckering through this
thing.

Her fingernails were again adorned with polish. This time the
color was one more suited to Jacqui's dark gypsy coloring than
the one she had worn initially as Scully's twin.  Her toenails
had been painted to match and on her feet were the two and a
half inch tall high heeled mules she had tried to talk her
Mother out of buying when they'd gone to the shoe store.

"Well?!?"  Bonnie's tone was impatient, with just a touch of
anxiety thrown in for effect.  "What do you think?"  Bronwyn
let her voice become wheedling.

Jacqui opened her mouth to answer, but could find no words. 
Her head swivelled to look at Bonnie then back to the mirror
before finally setting on her friend.  "I don't know what to
think.  I did not know I could look this way.  I'm...." she
struggled to force out the word. "Goodness, Bonnie, I am
pretty."

Bonnie snorted.  "Pretty, hell, girl.  You are beautiful." 
"Sexy as hell" was Jack's uninvited input.  Jacqui ordered him
back into his cave.  She had enough trouble on her hands. 
"Heck, a little work and you would have the boys lining up to
take you out."

That remark got just the negative response the Bronwyn had
expected. "Boys are not a big thing in my life, Bonnie.  I
have things to work out before I consider going that way."

Bonnie shrugged.  "Whatever.  Boys do have their uses,
especially if you train them well.  Still, you still ought to
make the most of your looks because the other girls will
notice.  I don't understand how you can have all this
wonderful stuff and not use it.  And that bloody ponytail. 
Let me tell you, Jacqui, if I see that thing again I am going
to do something violent to your hair."

Jacqui's voice became a whisper.  "One reason I don't use it
is because I don't know how. Mom bought this stuff, not me. 
This, " and she swept a hand over the top of the cosmetics,
"is not something I would purchase.  I just don't see myself
that way."

"Well, you ought to, girl.  And how can you not know how to
use makeup?  Your Mom seemed to wear hers well enough.  Really
subtle work - only another woman would even see what she had
done.  If she bought this, why didn't she teach you how to do
it?"

Jacqui looked away.  "Ummm, well, my Mom and I are not getting
along just now."

"Huh!" was Bonnie's disbelieving response. "The woman I saw
tonight thinks you put the stars in the sky.  I like your
Mom."

Suddenly, Jacqui needed to talk to someone, needed to air her
feelings, at least a little.  Wasn't that what friends were
for? Carefully, she chose her words and asked, "What if I told
you she took something from me, maybe forever.  Something I
never thought I could lose because it was everything I thought
I wanted out of life.  She simply took it from me, without
warning, and then thought I should be grateful."

Bronwyn listened to the emotion as much as the words.  She
heard the hurt, the lingering sense of betrayal.  She paused
as if to consider Jacqui's words. "Sounds like a man." she
said, deliberately misunderstanding, "Is that why you aren't
into boys, because you have a man you are in love with?" 

"No.  Nothing like that.  More like a dream.  What I wanted to
do with my life.  Where I would go to school.  Something like
that, anyway."  She sighed.

Bonnie pursed her lips.  "Well, I don't know, girlfriend.  Off
hand, and without knowing the whole story, I would say your
Mom probably thought she was doing the best she could for you. 
I don't know much about her, but if that was not love and
pride I saw in her eyes at dinner, I completely misread her. 
Don't you love her?"  The infinitely costly question was out
in the open.  Bronwyn crossed her mental fingers for her dear
friend.

"So much it is killing me to think she could do this to me,
change me into a wo... I mean, change my entire life without
so much as a "by your leave" or honest warning."

"Do you think she loves you?"  Another big question floated
down on to the table.

"Now.  I think she does now.  I thought she did before, but
then she did this.  And all I can wonder is what wasn't good
enough about me before?"

"Jacqui, you are working very hard not to tell me explicitly
what your Mom did.  What I do think is that she loves you and
you love her, and you are both hurting.  I think you should
try to believe that she did whatever "it" was, because she
honestly believed that it was the best thing she could do for
you.  If you try that, and you find you cannot believe it,
then maybe you have to leave.  You are almost eighteen.  You
can leave after you graduate from school."

"If I do that, I can never regain what I lost."

"Can your Mother undo what she has done?"  

"She says she can't.  After seeing how miserable we have both
been, I think I even believe her, but she says she has the
means to help me undo it.  Eventually."

"It sounds to me as if she made a mistake, Jacqui, one based
in love, but a mistake none-the-less.  Do you think she is
unwilling to help you achieve this goal of yours now?"

"No."  Jacqui sighed.  "She is not unwilling.  Disappointed,
but she will help me."

"Then if I were you, I would try to forgive her and get on
with your life and what you must do.  Love is a very precious
commodity in this life, luv.  I would not throw any of it away
if I were you."

Tears cascaded down Jacqui's face, cutting mascara-black
rivers through the rest of her makeup.  Sobbing, she let
Bonnie take her in her arms and lead her to the bed, where she
cried herself to sleep in the comfort of her friend's arms.

End Part 6. Continued in Part 7


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