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From: dez187lm@hotmail.com (H.D. Meister)
Subject: {ASSM} Story: To the Winds - to the winds.txt [1/1]
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Greetings from the edge dear reader. Again... if you are not at least
18 or live in a community where adult material is not wanted, DO NOT
READ THIS! Post freely and archive if you desire. Critique as you
see fit. All I ask is that you do not make a profit from my work and
give the author all due credit.
--
Know you this: I am all I am. Nothing more... never less. Live or
die, i do not care. So long as another sees and knows and learns,
then I am at peace.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
To the Winds By: H.D. Meister (dez187lm@hotmail.com)
Here I am. I know who I am. I know what I am. I know that I have
lived for so long, and will die just as sure as will anything else
which lives. I know many things... like where I stand with you.
Once there was a time when we didn't know each other existed. Times
change. Now we not only know of each other, but we can tell when one
is plotting. I can see the thought you have before it is crushed on
your face. I know more of you than maybe you do. I know what your
heart craves.
And I am willing to give it that and so much more. Yet I cannot.
Why? Because to you, I am the brother you never had. I am family. I
am someone whom you trust beyond trusting yourself. And I can never
know the pleasures of your flesh. So be it.
But this does not mean that I have no mind. Years spent pondering
science fiction have birthed a mind capable of grasping concepts most
obscure. I can see you reach for love in places most dark. The men
whom you claim to love are lost in their own worlds of pain and
paranoia. They cannot see beyond their own veils of lies and
half-truths. Those whom you spread your legs for may care for you...
even love you... but they care more for themselves.
And you know this. You know what I would do; I told you as much.
You know that I would spend countless hours nursing at the fountain
between your thighs. You know that it would never be just sex. You
know it would not... could not... be just a fuck. You know. So do
you fear it, or do I, or do we both?
How long are we to dance around the reality we both know exists? How
many nights must we spend either alone of in the arms of someone we
hope understands? You don't know, and neither do I. Sadly... I
accept this while you continue to experiment.
Love is not some colony of fungus to be examined under a microscope.
It cannot be picked apart and analyzed by someone with more sheepskin
on his wall than a sheepherder with a thousand head of sheep. What
are we to each other? I know now, and it saddens what little of me is
human.
We will never know the pleasure of each other's caress. I will never
know what your lips taste like, or feel like as they wrap themselves
around my manhood. When I dream of holding you in my arms as we
pleasure each other, I know that this will be as close as I will ever
get.
You, however, never think of me. I am family, and decades of morals
teach that family do not have such thoughts about each other. You
wait patiently for your latest find to soothe the itch between your
thighs. You wait for the reality. And assume the role of willing
servant to their whims. Anal sex. Blow job. Fucking. These are
nothing but words to you. They are deeds which you do like blinking.
Less than nothing, and even less important.
It is these same morals which keep you in the arms of males only. You
fear the touch of a female so much that you will run and hide from it.
No reason... just morals taught to you by those who were taught by
those... It continues to be borne, and I will see the light of day of
you bear fruit.
And on that day, I shall cry again. not for you, for those tears have
long since dried up. What was his name? Or does that even matter to
you? I will remember the name of the woman who walks with my child in
her womb. I shall love that child... sacrifice my own immortal soul
if it means that my chi9ld will never know the pain I have felt.. I
will teach my child that the coin has two sides. What will you teach
yours? Will you teach a boy that only women can give him pleasure?
Will you share the pleasures of fucking with your daughter? Will you
teach her how to suck dick the "right" way?
There was a time when I would dare to answer those questions for you.
Now... I am older. I do not care. I don't even care for you, and
that is my greatest tragedy. Fly or fall... live or die. I do not
care. You have chosen your path. You sleep with those for whom the
lure of green fields and white snow are all. You thrash about in
their dreams, making them your own. You have forgotten yourself, and
all I can do is watch as you fall. inch by inch I see you fall, and
long to help you. I cannot. That is not my place.
I will go to sleep this night. Maybe I will dream... maybe not. I
don't care. What will be will be, and I will do what I can with what
I have. Suck on that dick. Fuck that cock. Call his name. But I
know the truth... you know nothing. Even if I know nothing... I know
I know nothing.
What do you know?
(dez187lm@hotmail.com)
--
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