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From: Andrew Roller <roller39@IDT.NET>
Subject: 22 Bikini Brigade part 22 of 22 (NND) dec13
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_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/
Andrew Roller Presents
NAUGHTY NAKED DREAMGIRLS
in
BIKINI BRIGADE
_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/
Chapter Twenty-Two
I awoke. I realized, with a start, that I’d been sleeping. I
felt a tug on my arm. I glanced over at it and saw little Pauline
pulling on me.
“Look!” Pauline whispered. She pointed out of the alcove we
were sitting in. Beyond, in the throne room, sitting on his throne, was
Licorice Lad! And sitting on his lap was Katie!
I stifled an urge to call out to her. As I gazed at them, I
realized that Katie and Licorice Lad were kissing. French kissing.
“What’re they doing?” Pauline asked me.
“Never mind,” I answered. “You’ll find out soon enough.” I
felt the gun in my hands. Did I dare to try it? The four little
peanuts had been dismissed, their job half done, apparently so Licorice
Lad and Katie could kiss in private. Their paint buckets sat on a mat
at the far end of the room.
“Oh, Licorice Lad, I LOVE you!” Katie said, breaking from her
kiss with him. “And licorice is my favorite candy!”
I watched with disgust as Licorice Lad put his hand into the
back of her panties. Why were they black?
“Yes, my sweet. Licorice is a very fine candy. And you have a
very fine bottom,” Licorice Lad said to Katie. “Have you been bad
lately?”
“Oh, no, Licorice Lad, my love,” Katie said. “I would never be
bad for you.”
Licorice Lad palmed Katie’s bottom, making her squirm.
“But if I wished you to be bad, then you would be?” Licorice
Lad asked. They kissed again, briefly.
“Oh, yes, Licorice Lad! I would be the very baddest girl of
all!” Katie said. Their lips meshed again, and I heard the disgusting
sound of a deep, prolonged kiss.
I looked down at Pauline.
“We must do something!” I said to her.
“Yes! He looks like he’s giving her mouth to mouth
restitution, but he ISN’T!” Pauline said.
“No, he isn’t,” I agreed. One didn’t need to feel the victim’s
bottom in order to revive a swimmer from drowning. “Okay, here’s the
plan,” I whispered to Pauline. I felt my gun with my palm. “On the
count of three, we’ll jump out of the Peppermint Portal. And I’ll aim
my gun right at Licorice Lad’s pimply face and hope my gun works. And I
want you to shout, very loudly, ‘We’re the Bikini Brigade’!”
“Then what do we do?” Pauline asked. For a 6-year-old, she was
pretty smart.
“I dunno,” I said, realizing what a weak plan I had. I listned
as Katie and Licorice Lad continued their kiss. “But it’s all I can
think of. Perhaps it will have some kind of effect on Katie. Or maybe
my gun will work. There’s really no other hope for us.”
“Oh, I hope my Daddie’s still alive!” Pauline said.
“I do too,” I answered.
I made the count slowly, hoping to come up with another plan.
“One... two... three.” I said. Pauline and I burst from the
alcove of the Peppermint Portal. “We’re the Bikini Brigade!” I cried.
Aiming my gun at Licorice Lad, I fired.
“ACKCK!” the boy shouted. I hit him square on his nose. But
only cream came out of my gun. Even if it had been marshmellow goop, I
suppose it wouldn’t have been any more effective. “Dratted girl! I’ve
found you! Couldn’t stay hidden, eh?” Licorice Lad yelled. He glared
at me. Then his face brightened, a little. “And who’s that you’ve
brought with you, hmmm?”
“We’re the Bikini Brigade!” Pauline said proudly. She put her
hands on her hips and stuck out her tummy.
“OHHHH-- I’m in the Bikini Brigade too!” Katie cried.
“Eh? Get back on my lap, you bitch!” Licorice Lad said to
Katie. She tried to get down off his legs. He pulled at her. She
pushed at him. The big candied turban on top of his head tottered, then
fell to the floor. It shattered into a million pieces. Katie dropped
to the floor and came running toward us. “I’m in the Bikini Brigade
too!” Katie cried. There was a confused look on her face.
I fired my gun at Licorice Lad again. It was still only
cream. It hit him in the face, another perfect shot, but he only wiped
it away.
However, Katie seemed suddenly much more certain of herself.
The confusion in which she’d been embroiled just a moment before
disappeared.
“I’m Katie Pepperdine!” Katie announced, halfway between us and
the throne where Licorice Lad was sitting. She turned. She looked back
at Licorice Lad. She looked down at the candied turban, smashed upon
the floor and then up at him again. For his part, Licorice Lad seemed
to be trying to exert a hold over her mind, but it wasn’t working.
“...And I HATE licorice!” Katie yelled.
“Katie! Come quick! You’re in the Bikini Brigade!” I called
to her.
“Yes! The Bikini Brigade!” Katie cried, turning and looking at
me. “I’M in the Bikini Brigade,” she said again, and she looked at
Pauline with jealous eyes. The small girl grabbed my hips.
“We’re all in the Bikini Brigade, Katie,” I shouted. “And this
is our newest member, Pauline! Pauline Praline!” I fired my gun at the
Licorice Lad again. I hit him, again! But it was still only cream.
“ACKCK! The Sultan’s daughter!” Licorice Lad said. “Guards!
Guards! Come and arrest these bitches! They’re shooting me with
cream!”
Suddenly, a voice was heard. It boomed out, way down in the
depths of the dungeon, like a gollum released suddenly from ancient
captivity.
“Away with these chains!” it yelled.
“Good God! The Sultan!” Licorice Lad said. Panic engulfed his
face. He reached for the turban atop his head, then realized it had
been smashed in a million pieces upon the floor. “Guards! Guards!”
Licorice Lad shrieked.
“Yes, master?” a gingerman asked. He came hurrying with heavy
footsteps into the room.
“The Sultan has broken free!” Licorice Lad said. “I no longer
have his turban. My powers depended upon it!”
“Master, what can *I* do?” the gingerman gaped.
“Grab those bitches!” Licorice Lad said, pointing to myself and
Pauline and Katie. “I’ll have to deal with the Sultan myself, using my
own inherent abilities.”
“Damnable boy!” the Sultan roared. He appeared suddenly in the
dark doorway that led down to the dungeon.
“Daddie!” Pauline cried. She rushed from my side and out
across the room.
“Away, girl! I must deal with this ruffian first!” the Sultan
yelled. He motioned for Pauline not to approach him. She scurried
behind his throne.
Licorice Lad jumped down from the big throne. He grabbed one
of the tall candlesticks that lit up the room. It was heavy, but he
managed it well, with a strength I had not imagined he possessed. His
black cape fluttered behind him as he swung it at the Sultan.
The candlestick hit the Sultan on his arm with a heavy thud.
The old man was lucky. Had he not lifted his arm, the candlestick would
have connected with his head.
“OW! Curses!” the Sultan cried, wincing. Licorice Lad swung
again. The Sultan raised his arm again, just in time, and suffered
another blow.
“Fie on this piece of shit!” Licorice Lad shouted. He threw
the candlestick aside. It went clattering behind him, almost taking
Pauline with him as it rolled across the floor. Pauline darted for
safety up into her father’s throne and sat perched on its seat, looking
quite small.
“I shall make use of the Existential Power to destroy you once
and for all, old man!” Licorice Lad cried. He extended his hands out in
front of himself.
“The Existentia--” the Sultan asked, seemingly of the room. A
black blast flung itself from the tips of Licorice Lad’s fingers and
engulfed the old man. He went hurtling backward, into the doorway of
the dungeon, and fell down several stairs.
“Daddie!” Pauline, sitting in her father’s throne, screamed.
“Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Yes, I’ve been learning, old man,”
Licorice Lad crowed. “I am Licorice Lad, the new Sultan of Candy--”
A white hot blast came from the opening that led down to the
dungeon. It threw Licorice Lad backward against the throne.
“Ack!” Licorice Lad cried. He looked dazed, but then
recovered. “I summon all the villains, thiefs, and robbers,” Licorice
Lad cried. “Come to Licorice Lad! Come! Fly through the air if you
must! All of you, come!”
Nothing happened. Licorice Lad gazed about himself. All was
as before, with Pauline cowering on the seat of her father’s throne, and
her father groaning, now, in the dark place that led down to the
dungeon. I saw one of his hands above the top step. Then his head
raised up above it. Immediately Licorice Lad flung a new blast of dark
radiation from the tips of his fingers. The Sultan shrieked and his
head was seen no more.
“Yes, old man, feel my power!” Licorice Lad shouted. “Is that
you I hear groaning down there?” A pitiful old man’s moan emanted from
the stairway leading down underground. “I have won! I am the new
Sultan!” Licorice Lad said.
Pauline leaned out over the armrest of her father’s throne.
Suddenly she flung herself onto Licorice Lad’s head, from behind. She
clawed at his face with her small fingers.
“Oh, you! Stop hoiting my Daddy!” Pauline cried.
“Aghh! Get off me, you little imp!” Licorice Lad yelled.
There was the sound of a horse-drawn coach clattering up the
great hall. A team of Clydesdales came galloping into the throne room.
“The royal coach!” I gasped.
“The one we rode in!” Katie said.
“Master, we have arrived, though how quickly, I do not know,”
the driver atop the carriage announced. The door on the side of the
carriage opened. A small dwarf jumped down. He was holding a gun, just
like mine, and he waved it about with a flourish.
“Oh, I’m big, bad Tommy the troll!
Do you think me droll?
Then I’ll shoot you right through to your soul
Because I’m big, bad Tommy the troll.
The very terrible troll!” the troll sang. He advanced on the
throne, which sat empty now, as Pauline battled Licorice Lad, digging
into his eyes with her fingers.
“Damnable bitch! Guards! Guards!” Licorice Lad cried.
“Silence, fool!” Tommy yelled. He fired his gun at Licorice
Lad. To my heart-beating surprise, the marshmellow goop stuck to the
boy, and to Pauline too, enmeshing them both together in a big, messy
blob of marshmellow.
Tommy walked up to the royal throne. He regarded it a moment,
with a broad smile. Then he climbed up onto it. He beamed at us.
“Yes, slaves, regard your new Sultan. The Sultan of all
Candyland!” the troll announced to us.
Suddenly a blast of white fire shot out from the doorway that
led down to the dungeon.
“YEEK!” the troll cried. He and the entire throne went
toppling sideways to the floor.
“I AM the Sultan!” Pauline’s dad announced. With a newfound
sense of power, he strode from the doorway leading down to the dungeon.
The troll aimed his marshmellow gun at the Sultan and fired.
The gun had no effect.
“Troll, regard your king!” the Sultan said to Tommy.
“Yikes!” Tommy cried. He fired his gun again and, although a
powerful jet of marshmellow goop shot out of it, it only evaporated
against the Sultan, like so much air.
“There they are! The girls! Grab them!” I heard a woman cry.
I glanced toward the open doorway that led into the great hall.
“Omigod! Child Protective Services!” Katie cried. She flung
herself against me. For my part, I backed into the peppermint colored
alcove. I brandished my gun at the three women, plus the man who was
with them. They ran at us.
“Stop, humans!” the Sultan cried. But he seemed to have no
power, or no wish, to stop them, for he did not use his powerful white
rays upon them.
“One... two... three... four... five. Five!” I cried, punching
my finger into each of the fingers in the hand. The Peppermint Portal
began throbbing.
It was no use, I felt. There was a quivering sensation in my
body, as if I might go someplace, as if the portal was warming itself up
to take me there, and Katie along with me, but Ms. Matilda Brunswald was
running toward us, at top speed, and she would be in the portal within
seconds.
Suddenly a pink glow engulfed the room. There was a sound,
very loud, as of enormous energy being released.
“Eeeeyah!” Matilda cried. Her whole body stopped in
mid-stride. She clawed at the air. The pink glow continued, heating
the air. The Sultan looked puzzled.
“My Candification machine! It has reached climax!” the troll
lying on the floor announced.
“Eeeyah! I’m turning to candy!” Ms. Matilda Brunswald yelled.
She continued to grope at the air and, behind her, so did her three
companions, Affidavit Al, Wilma Writ, and Glenda Guilty.
“We’re all turning into candy!” Glenda said.
“I’m-- I’m becoming a yummie person!” Al said. He smelled his
arm, then under his arm pit. “A very yummie person!”
The quivering in my body deepened. I clutched at Katie. She
was already holding me and she gripped me even tighter.
We awoke in my jeep. I looked at her. She looked at me. We
gazed up at the trees overhead. There were no candy apples hanging in
the branches. Just pine cones.
“Katie! We’re home!” I cried.
“Try the engine!” Katie said. I did. And when I turned the
key, the engine started, and with it my dream came to a complete end,
and I awoke.
THE END
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