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From: M1KEHUNT@aol.com
Subject: <500 words "Memo" - by MIKEÊHUNT (+help request) 1



Dear Readers:

Celeste, of "Celestial Reviews" fame, is holding her second Third
Annual Short Story contest. This is one of my entries. She has also
announced that she will allow herself to be influenced by your mail.
Her address is Celeste801@aol.com.  You know what to do and where to
do it.

My first entry is called "Memo". It's not a story, per se, but if some
fucking English teacher is going to disqualify me because of a small
rules infraction like that, then she deserves to get a lot of really
nasty e-mails, know what I mean?

I mean, she's allowing Taria's "Cain and Abel" and it was a day late.
Just like some dumb teacher to believe the "dog ate my monitor cable"
excuse.  Anyway it's a great story, and I'm really sorry it's in the
contest 'cause now I have NO shot.

Well, I probably have no shot anyway unless you help. Does anyone know where
Celeste lives, and also, does anyone have $10,000 I can borrow? 


Herewith, "Memo" - by M1KE HUNT:



                         M1KE HUNT ENTERPRISES

Interoffice Memo To:   

Ivonna Ardon     Ivan Athole     Howie Balzer     Les Bian     Harry Box
Dick Butkus     Oliver Clothesoff     The Dickner Bros: Iben, Uben, and Heben
Fonda Dix      Neal Downe     Ben Dover     Dick Dragon     C. Howie Fartz
Wilma Fingerdo     P. Freely     Peter Grabber     Mike Hawk     Richard Hed
Dick Hertz     Ima Hore     Betty Humpter     Buster Hyman     Haywood
Jablome
Hugh Jazz     Jack Kanoff     Connie Lingus     Phillip Llerenas     Mike Lit
Pat McCann     Phil McGroin     Jack Mehoff     Craven Morehead    Dick
Nibbler
Mike Ocksucker     Harry Puzey     Ivan Recshin    Ophelia Self     R. Sole
Ann L. Sphincter    Dick Spitzalot    Dick Swett    Jenny Talia     Kandy
Thys
Tess Tichols    Dickie Trickle     Eric Tzhun     Peter Wacker   Albert
Zweiner


From:  M1KE HUNT

Re:  Leftovers

I see we have a couple of "remainders" just sitting around, and as
you know, we're falling behind schedule.  I've already talked to Mr. Hed
about his habit of hiring a hooker for the office every Wednesday. And while
I may have stood in the circle and gotten a blowjob with the rest of you,
it's time to get to work.  No finger pointing. Or any other digit, please.
For all our sakes, take these random intros and see if you can
turn them into something for Celeste's Short Story contest:

INTRO #1:  Her head was nestled between my legs. She was licking my balls
with a fury I had rarely seen before today. She kept at it for at least
five minutes even though I asked her to stop.  I grabbed my long hard
shaft and turned toward her, threatening her with it.  "How the hell am
I going to improve my pitching wedge if that fucking collie won't take
my practice balls out of her mouth?" I wondered.  I have a big tournament
this weekend....  (Please attach rest of story...)

INTRO #2:  I spread apart those well turned legs looking for that divine
honey
pot that I knew was sure to be there. My practiced eye traveled up one leg
until I spotted it. Sure enough, "Miller's Honey Box" was stamped on
the side and I knew I had found another antique treasure from the 1920's.
The sturdy little piece of furniture had stood quietly in the back of the
store... (Please attach rest of story...)

INTRO #3:  It was a dark and stormy night...  (On second thought, skip this
one.  It's a stupid opening and totally unbelievable anyway.)

Which brings me to my last point.  We have to stop using dumb openings to
these things.  Just get the disclaimer out of the way and get on with the
action.  Our customer satisfaction ratings have slipped from 97% to 95.3%
in the latest J.D. Powers survey, and I think our "too clever" openings
may have something to do with it.

And use a simple disclaimer, like:  *Under 18? Go away.*  That'd do it.
OK, let's get to work. Oh, and Dick, please report to my office.
It's Wednesday.

Thanks

M1KE


BTW: In case you're wondering, we had to let Hugh G. Rection go.
He just didn't fit in.




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