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From: Buck N <buckn@hotmail.com>
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Subject: (NEW) Buddy Long in "Makin' Some Friends" (m/f, celebs, humor)
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This is the first of what I hope will be an ongoing series of stories
featuring the sexual misadventures of Buddy Long, 'middle-aged male
escort to the stars'.

I would greatly appreciate hearing your comments.

Thanks and enjoy,
Buck N
	
	WARNING: The following is a piece of adult fiction and is 
	NOT intended for minors or those who are easily offended.

	PROLOG

	Hollywood.
	You say that name to people and they immediately have visions of fame
and fortune. Nothing but hot and cold running stars, and streets paved
with glamour and glitz.
	Fact is though, it’s more like living inside a really noisy, smoggy
light-bulb! 
	Everybody’s out for themselves, and unless you’re somebody, nobody
gives a shit about you. It’s all about greed and lust. If you got the
cash, you can get whatever, or whoever, you want...and if you want the
cash, you gotta be willing to give them what they really need!
	That’s where I come in.
	Buddy Long’s the name, and there’s plenty of names for what I do.
Gigolo, playboy, hustler, male escort, boy-toy, you name it. Sure, I’m
not much to look at, but then again, what balding, over-weight guy
pushing forty-five is? Friends tell me I look like Dennis Franz’s fatter
less-attractive brother, but hey, who needs friends anyway. The point is
I got the equipment, and, more importantly, I know how to use it!
	God gives everybody a gift, or so I’m told. Some are great writers, or
musicians, or artists. Others have a skill for sports. Others become
great doctors or lawyers. What His All-Mighty bestowed upon me though is
something altogether unique.
	Though I initially come off as just another fat slob with dandruff and
a bad mustache on the outside, underneath beats the heart of a man who
can satisfy any woman, anywhere, anytime, in ways that she’s never even
dreamed of!
	How do I do it, you ask. Well, let’s just say I have, over the years,
staked a reputation for myself with the more well-to-do ladies in town
of being able to bring them to earth-shattering orgasm without even
really trying. Plus, having a well-trained tool the size of Texas
doesn’t hurt either! Hey, it’s a living...

	BUDDY LONG in
	“MAKIN’ SOME FRIENDS”
	by Buck N. ©1998 All rights reserved.
	mailto:buckn@hotmail.com

	It was a Friday night, and I found myself at yet another dull movie
premiere bash. The usual faces were there. Jack, Clint, Arnold, Bruce
and Demi. I was surprised to see so many big shots there considering the
movie was such a load of horseshit. I mean, who writes this crap anyway?
	Farrah sent me a pass in lieu of payment for our last “date”. (That’s
her word for it, not mine!) She’s a good old gal who really knows how to
suck dick, so I figured, what the hell.
	I was making my way back to the bar for yet another complimentary beer
when I felt a tap on my arm. Turning around, I found myself looking down
the low-cut dress of a very cute, but overly perky amber-haired babe.
	“Um, hi”, she said, looking around like she was worried somebody might
see her.
	I replied with a long deep belch. (Hey, what do you expect? Those beers
were making me gassy!) She looked at me like I just told her I like to
fuck my mother.
	“What’s up”, I said, staring down at her mighty fine set of jugs.
	She lowered her head so I could see her face. “Is your name Buddy?” She
asked, finally getting my eyes to meet hers. Jesus, I thought, just how
much does this broad spend on mousse anyway! Her hair looked like it
must have cost her a few dimes, all slick and styled like it was.
	“Yeah, that’s me”, I said, blinking through my Budweiser haze. “So
who’s asking?”
	Giving me that look like I should know who she was, I figured she must
be somebody famous. Or at least somebody who thought she was famous.
	“My name’s Jennifer”, she said, clearly pissed at my failure to
immediately recognize her.
	I stared at her, weaving a little.
	“Jennifer Aniston”, she finally added.
	“Oh right”, I said. “You’re on that show.”
	“That’s right”, she said, breathing a sigh of relief.
	“You’re the one who plays Chrissy.”
	“No”, she said, suddenly all confused.
	“Then you must be Janet, right?”
	“No”, she hissed, looking all around again. “You’re thinking of
‘Three’s Company’!”
	“Yeah, that’s it”, I said. “So which one are ya? I know ya ain’t that
Mrs. Roper! She’s a real dog!” I laughed at my little joke (I’m always
cracking myself up) but she just rolled her eyes. Shit, I thought, I
figured I was paying her a compliment!
	“Look”, she said, suddenly taking my arm and pulling me towards a
nearby table hidden behind some giant ferns. “I don’t really have much
time.”
	“Hey”, I said, wondering what the hell this chick was on about. “What
gives?”
	She sat me down and pulled up a chair next to mine.
	“I understand you provide a certain...um...service”, she finally said,
after making sure nobody could see or hear us.
	“Yeah”, I said, knowing only too well what she was after. “I guess you
could call it that.”
	She opened her purse and started digging around. “How much do you
charge?”
	“Depends on what you’re in the mood for”, I said, a little stunned by
how direct she was.
	“Here”, she said, handing me a card with a phone number on it. “Call me
after 10pm. If I’m not there, leave a message and I’ll get back to you,
okay?”
	“Well, all right”, I said, taking her card.
	Without another word, she got up and walked back into the crowd. I
watched her sidle up to some big tall blonde pretty-boy. I don’t know
who he was, but he was being interviewed on camera by that
Prozac-popping bitch from ‘Entertainment Tonight’, Mary Hart (another
unfortunate regular of mine). Jennifer squeezed up next to him and gave
him a little peck on the cheek.
	“Well, well”, I said to myself. “I guess poor little ‘blondie-boy’
doesn’t have what it takes to satisfy our little Ms. Aniston.”

	Normally I won’t take on any new clients without a referral, but this
little cutie seemed ready to go, and my curiosity got the better of me.
Phoning a little after 10 like she said, I left a message on her
machine, and she called me right back. She sounded a little nervous on
the phone, not as ballsy as she did earlier that evening. She gave me
her address and I hopped in my trusty ‘84 Honda Civic and headed out.
	Like all of these Hollywood broads, she had the usual big rambling
house hidden away somewhere in the hills. I rang the gate and she let me
drive in. Getting to the door I knocked and Jennifer opened it almost
immediately.
	“‘Friends’, right?” I said, grinning and pointing a finger. I had
checked my Hollywood ‘Who’s-Who’ (better known as People magazine), and
finally figured out who she was.
	“Yeah, that’s me”, she shrugged, smiling. She seemed a lot less icy
than at the party. As I kissed her cheek on my way into the foyer I
could smell the wine on her breath. I heard her stumble a little as she
followed me into the living room, and I knew she was quite drunk.
	Flopping down on her big sectional couch I looked around the room. It
was filled with the predictable designer furnishings I came to expect in
these homes.
	“So what’s up for tonight” I said, watching her sit at the other end of
the sofa. She was barefoot and wearing a very tight white t-shirt and
faded blue jeans that hugged her hot slim body. I’m usually pretty good
at spotting store-bought titties, but hers, though quite big, looked
real to me.
	“I’ve never...um...done this before”, she said, trying not to look
directly at me.
	“How’d you know who I was”, I asked.
	“Courteney told me about you”, she replied. I had no idea who she was
talking about.
	“Which one’s she?”
	“Skinny, black hair, big butt”, she replied.
	“Oh wait”, I said. ”Now I remember her. She’s the one who likes it up
the ass.”
	“You’re kidding me!” She laughed, her eyes suddenly getting real wide.
	“Oh yeah”, I recalled. “Couldn’t get enough of it. Howled like a
banshee she did. I thought I was killin’ her, but she just kept
screaming for more!”
	
	Turns out I had fucked Courteney in the past on several occasions, but
she told me her name was Monica or something. Either way, I had to drop
her from my Rolodex of regulars after a while. She was just a little too
freaky, even for Buddy.
	When I wasn’t fucking the shit right out of her tight horny round ass,
she insisted on sticking her long boney toes in my mouth! Drove her
crazy, she said, but made me just sick. Sure she was generous when it
came to paying for my services, but a professional guy, such as myself,
has to maintain certain standards, y’know!

	All this weird-ass anal talk about Courteney was really starting to get
our little Jenny all fired up. She got me a glass of wine (I asked for a
Bud, but she was all out) and joined me at my end of the couch. Sipping
from her own glass, she was finally starting to loosen up a bit.
	“So, tell me”, she said, looking me over. “Is it true what they say
about you?”
	“And what’s that?” I was playing it real coy, knowing full well what
she was going to ask me next.
	“Is it true you can make any woman cum, anywhere, at anytime?”
	“Guilty as charged, baby.” Man, I’m slick!
	“And just what would it take to prove your guilt to me?” She was
getting pretty sly her own self!
	“Well, I’m afraid nothing in life is free, sweetheart.” Now I was all
business. In my experience, the richer these bitches are, the tighter
they hang onto their cash. I got to be firm if I’m going to make a
living, y’know. “It’s fifty dollars, cash, if you want the whole
enchilada, I’m afraid.”
	She looked at me like I was a talking dog. Why do these broads always
flinch when I tell them how much it’s gonna cost? Hell baby, I’m worth
it! She finally got up and fetched her purse.
	After carefully counting the bills, I stood up and started loosening my
lucky hand-painted tie. The one with the busty hula-girl on it. It never
fails to works it’s charms!
	“Wait, wait”, she said, struggling to get up. She skipped over to the
stereo and hit the CD player. The room filled with soft jazz. “Okay, now
I’m ready”, she giggled, hopping back onto the couch.
	I shrugged and continued my little show. One thing about women every
man should know is that you can’t just stick it in there. They really
get off on the foreplay. As Sigourney once told me, ”Hey, you can never
gun a cold engine, Buddy!”
	After letting my short-sleeved, poly-cotton blend plaid shirt drop to
the floor, Jennifer had a real good look at my hot torso. She hugged one
of her big cushions, peeking over the top and giggled with sheer delight
as I rubbed my meaty hands all over that big round furry
‘built-by-Budweiser’ belly of mine.
	Turning around I started to undo my pants, and not a moment too soon
either. Watching little Jenny rolling around on that sofa was starting
to get Mr. Long’s big dong real frisky, if you know what I mean! I let
her gaze for a while at my moderately hairy back, speckled ever so
lightly with tiny beads of sweat, as I eased my sky blue trousers off my
beefy round ass cheeks. I heard her gasp with surprise as I revealed the
neon-purple glow-in-the-dark thong hidden underneath. One of my favorite
fool-proof turn-ons for the ladies!
	Well now the moment she’d really been waiting for had arrived. Turning
to face her once again, I hooked my thumbs under the waist band and
slowly started circling my hips in time to the music. One of the great
perks about my job is seeing, time after time, the look of complete and
utter amazement on the faces of all my satisfied customers as I finally
reveal ‘the full monty’. Tonight was no exception.
	
	Unlike all those crap movies and television shows churned out by the
idiots who run this town, the hype surrounding my ‘main attraction’ is
well deserved. My dick was almost fully erect as I pushed that thong
down past my pubes. It suddenly popped out and swung in the air as I let
the waist band snap back up under my swollen, low-hanging hairy ball
sac. Jennifer was noticeably impressed.
	“I never would have believed it if I hadn’t actually seen it”, she said
in a low, steady voice. She shook her head and then laughed out loud
with wonder. “I mean, I’m seeing it and I still don’t believe it!”
Jennifer crawled off the couch and sat cross-legged on the floor at my
feet, staring up at that massive pole swaying above her. She looked at
it almost clinically, like some kind of weird animal you’d only see at
the zoo, or something.
	“Just how big is it anyway?” She finally said, sitting up to get a
better look.
	“Last I checked”, I said, smiling down at her. “About 12 inches.”
	“Wow”, she blurted out, and I saw her lips were starting to get moist.

	Another benefit of my particular line of work is the opportunity to
observe (and experience!) the many varied sexual practices enjoyed by
our more popular female celebrities residing in the Hollywood area
today. It never ceases to amaze me just what these different women find
pleasurable. You’d be surprised to learn that the girls who go out of
their way to put on a “come-fuck-me” image are the ones who are the most
conservative when it comes to ‘riding the big salami’. Take Madonna for
instance. Loves showing off naked pictures of herself with all sorts of
leather and animals, but hates having a dick in her throat. Whereas a
girl-next-door type, like Courteney, can’t seem to get enough cock up
her ass. Weird!
	Turns out Jennifer was no different than the rest. Sure she looks all
wholesome and sweet on that show of hers, but get her full of wine and
show her a nice big fat juicy nob and she starts acting like a freakin’
nymphomaniac!
	She asked (or should I say begged!) to have a taste of my long pulsing
veiny dick. Not being one to deny my customers anything their hearts, or
mouths desire, I let her tease my swollen purple mushroom-topped
cock-head into her full wet pouty lips. She grabbed and squeezed at
those round sweaty balls of mine, letting them roll around in her warm
hands as she proceeded to take some long slow drags on my extra-long
shaft. I could feel my pits and back start to get real wet with sweat as
she massaged my meat with her warm wet tongue and lips. Man, could she
ever give amazing head!
	Feeling my balls start to pump with pre-cum juices, I realized we had
better get on with the business at hand before I lose my load and have
to return my 50 bucks! I lifted Jennifer to her feet and tried to undo
her jeans. She gently pushed my hands away and unzipped them herself.
Sitting on the couch, she gingerly slid those pale denims down her long
tanned legs, revealing to my pleasant surprise that the t-shirt she wore
was actually a french-cut body suit. She curled her legs under her ass,
and held out her arms inviting me to her. I struggled with my thong,
finally wrestling it off my legs, and strolled over to her wearing
nothing now but my black socks and Hush Puppies.
	Taking her by the waist, I swung her around so her absolutely flawless
pear-shaped ass was in the air. She folded her arms on the back of the
couch and spread her firm shapely thighs for me. I kept one hand on her
firm round ass cheek as I skillfully undid those snaps. As that material
sprang back revealing the honey-soaked prize underneath, I heard
Jennifer let out a long deep-throated sigh. Man, was she gonna enjoy
this, I thought!
	Along with my sizable appendage, I also possess a very long, very
experienced tongue that knows every nook and cranny of a women’s nether
regions. With swift darting stabs, I began to explore Jennifer’s sweet
(and thankfully shaved) pussy. I could feel her every spasm and quake as
I quickly found those magically sensitive spots that have eluded all her
previous lovers. Ms. Aniston cooed softly as I began lapping at her
hardening clit with clock-work precision. Soon her whole bottom was
soaked with a slick shiny mixture of her juices, and my warm spit. She
was now ready, and more than willing, for Part Two of my all-inclusive
‘Buddy Long Special Treatment’.
	“Oh my God”, she breathed as I moved her onto her back, and rested her
ankles on my broad freckled shoulders. Pushing that body suit up past
her tanned tits, I revealed their full roundness. I gently ran my hand
over the nipples, squeezing gently as I went. I was happy to discover
those knockers were all-natural. 
	My extra-long dick found a resting spot in the cleavage of Jennifer’s
sloppy wet snatch. I began to slowly move my hips back and forth,
stroking that pebble-hard clit with the underside of my steely rod.
Rolling her head back as she arched her spine, Jennifer slowly let her
thighs drop to the sides. I could feel that juice coating my cock,
lubing it up good for the job at hand.
	“Fuck me”, she finally whispered, putting her hands on my belly and
rubbing them around. I could see those slim little fingers snaking all
through my sweaty hairs. “I need it so bad.”
	Jennifer started to breath harder, in short sharp little gasps of
anticipation, as I took my cock and placed that greasy shiny head
against her opening. With a slow smooth steady thrust, I entered her,
feeling her very warm, very moist walls engulf my monstrous manhood. She
grabbed at the cushions, pulling them from their places, as my round
belly came to rest on her firm golden-brown fat-free tummy. I was all
the way inside her now! My hairy gravity-ridden balls lightly brushing
up against her round little butt cheeks.
	I took her thighs in my hands and pushed her knees to her tits. Her
toes were pointing straight up. Now came the time I revealed yet another
of my practiced skills. With the muscle control of an Olympic athlete, I
started rotating my cock ever so slightly inside her. She suddenly shot
a look of utter astonishment at me as she felt the sensation of that
independently gyrating cock within her!
	“Oh my God”, she repeated, but much louder this time. I spread her legs
high and wide as I started to slowly pump that cock-hungry slit. All the
while maintaining a perfectly steady swirling of my dick. She pounded
the sofa with her fist as she felt her release starting to build! I
increased my speed, hearing my wet fleshy skin slapping hard against her
quivering body.
	Suddenly, and without any warning, she shuttered so violently her body
exploded upwards and actually caught air! I could barely hang onto her
as she landed back on the couch and started to rock and roll all over
the damn place! Jennifer bit her lip hard as she let out this
unbelievably loud moan.
	“Uuuunnnhhhh”, she bellowed, followed by a whole series of deep throaty
grunts as she bucked her hips against my groin. She was knocking up
against me so hard I thought I was going to fall over backwards!
	When the hell is this chick going to finally finish up, I wondered!
	At long last I could feel her start to relax. With one leg draped over
my shoulder, she lazily wrapped her other foot back around my ass. I was
taken aback as I felt her heel bump against my ass cheek, lightly
pushing me into her. This just made my juices boil!
	“Shit, baby”, I said, staring at her in amazement. “You do want it bad,
don’t ya?”
	Jennifer slowly nodded her head as she pushed her sweat soaked hair
away from her pretty face. “Oh yeah”, she sighed.
	I couldn’t hold it back any longer! Rolling her hard nipples between my
stubby fingers, I started fucking that pussy again, delighted to feel
her muscles clenching around my pulsing shaft. As my balls started to
pump I huffed and puffed like I was going to have a fuckin’ heart
attack!
	“Awwwww, shit!” I yelled, feeling that geyser of cum start to erupt!
	Jennifer suddenly bolted back a bit and my raging cock escaped from her
slick jizz-milking hole. It popped up and a half-dozen ropes of thick
white-hot jizz arced across her torso, landing mostly on her face and
hair! “Holy fuck”, I shouted as I watched that cream smack onto her
cheeks and lips.
	She slowly rolled her face from side to side, licking up all that cum
painted onto her mouth. Tracing her finger tips over her messy tits, she
scooped up even more of that milky liquid, and brought it to her lips.
Stroking my softening dick, I slapped her pussy with it, tossing my last
few precious drops onto her belly. I was totally spent now and leaned on
the arm rest, watching with amazement as Jennifer let that fluid drip
onto her snaking tongue.
	“So”, I said, breathing hard. “Was it everything you’d hoped it would
be?”
	“Guilty as charged, baby”, she replied, smiling from ear to ear.
	What a sly little minx she was!

	Jennifer employed my services on a fairly regular basis after that.
Then I suddenly stopped hearing from her. I thought maybe she had
finally grown tired of me. Fat chance! Turns out she was busy making a
movie. I found this out when her blonde bubble-headed co-star on that
show, Lisa, phoned me inquiring as to my availability while her husband
was out of town. Guess little Ms. Aniston (like her pal Courteney) was
getting the word out on their newest ‘friend’, Buddy Long!

The End.

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