Message-ID: <15779eli$9810010529@qz.little-neck.ny.us> X-Archived-At: <URL:http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/15779.txt> From: LadyCyrrh@aol.com Subject: The Annex Reviews, 9/30/98 Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-transfer-encoding: 7bit Content-type: text/plain; charset=US-ASCII Path: qz!not-for-mail Organization: The Committee To Thwart Spam Approved: <usenet-approval@qz.little-neck.ny.us> X-Moderator-Contact: Eli the Bearded <story-admin@qz.little-neck.ny.us> X-Story-Submission: <story-submit@qz.little-neck.ny.us> X-Original-Message-ID: <1f12ceb4.3612671c@aol.com> X-Is-Review: yes Hi, here's another batch of stories. The three-a-month schedule is working out well, and I will probably stick with it. I received an email lately asking how I thought stories should be broken up for web publication. Well, that is entirely up to the writer and their news feed. Some programs enable you to post messages up to 100,000 words; others, 1,000 words or less. I myself feel a length between 2,500 and 6,000 words is ideal, as it can be read by most people within a few minutes or so and lets them decide if they want to continue on with the rest of the story. On the other hand, it's not short enough to be annoying, which a story of, say, 40,000 words broken into 40 chapters of 1,000 words each would be. Remember this is the internet; story posts--which may contain major plot points--get lost all the time. So the closer to 5,000-6,000 words you can go, the better; and the less postings you can make, the better. The story itself may also lend itself to be being cut at certain points, such as the revelation that the Duke's mad daughter was in reality a son, wherein all the candles go out and a burst of eerie laughter is heard: MWUH-HUH-HUH-HUH! Clear 'nuff? Among other news, kudos to rock star Marilyn Manson for making himself like a "Jem and the Holograms" fashion doll on acid, with a cataract, on the cover of the October 15th Rolling Stone. Kudos also to the photo of MTV brat Jessie on page 59, who will be making my gay friends squirm in their jeans, and an article on a cybersex rape trial in New York. The stories: Fantastic Forum, by Black Rose (M/F superhero sex) Forest Fire, by November Tuesday (M/F rom, nature sex) Monastery Tales, Chapter 3, by James Stuart (M/b, b/b, historical) Novelty Store, by Blue Words (M/F, BDSM, toys, humor) The Reality of Virtual Possession, by Tigger (M/F femdom, SF) Website Review: Erotic Fiction by Magician Fantastic Forum [C] Where posted: ASS When posted: 9/24/98 Author: Black Rose Address: josh_t@hotmail.com The Fantastic Four have some carnal adventures in this superhero story which Stan Lee would have never approved of. Unfortunately, they were orchestrated through the agency of "Kristoff Von Doom...a fifteen year old with no outlet for any of his sexual energies" which means they were more than a little on the mindless side and incompetently written, most likely by a thinly disguised version of Mr. Von Doom himself. Yes, I'm afraid the "Josh T." was a giveaway. No one over fifteen is named Josh these days. And the use of "cunny" which no red-blooded British man over the age of fifteen uses either. Forest Fire [B] Where posted: ASS, ASSM When posted: 9/27/98 Author: November Tuesday Address: november919@hotmail.com Website: www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Underground/3193 This story was an attempt at literary erotica wherein a man and woman go out into the forest to commune with nature, the sensual sights, sounds, and smells bringing out their wild instincts. It wasn't bad, but waaayyyy overwritten, and frankly the overwritten description of someone's camping trip just isn't very interesting to me. I'd rather read about distinct personalities and the fucking they do, and the odd circumstances that up to that fucking. An exercise in sensual writing; nothing more. Monastery Tales, Chapter 3 [A-/B+] Where posted: ASSGM When posted: 9/21/98 Author: James Stuart Address: ehistorian@yahoo.com Inspired by "The Name of the Rose" and various Brother Cadfael mysteries, this series of stories set in a medieval Italian monastery details the wilder-goings on between the good brothers and their younger charges, which means a lot of man- boy, boy-boy, and teen-boy sex, enlivened by authentic medieval details which are given in a low-key, non-pushy way. In this particular chapter, young Leo, the story's hero, is called upon to serve the Head Abbot at his table with his young friend, while the Head Abbot tries to convince his recalcitrant, spendthrift nephew of the pleasures available to him in the Church. Those pleasures include the asses of young boys. This story was interesting and full of good historical color, but suffered in that some of the dialogue was wooden (even considering the characters are monks) and as a continuing narrative it lacked a strong focus, the characters just rambling on to one sexual adventure after the other. On the other hand, it was fairly reflective of what *really* went on behind closed monastery doors. Novelty Store [A] Where posted: ASS, ASSM When posted: 9/27/98 Author: Blue Words Address: bluewords@yahoo.com I laughed throughout this story, which is that rare thing, a light- hearted bondage gear romp that isn't on the self-mocking side (the "I-know-it's-only-a-story-so-I'm-going-to-stick-in-as- much-kink-as-I-can" syndrome.) In other words, titillatingly realistic. A man who doesn't know what to buy his wife for her birthday decides to give the gift of himself--he will be her slave for a weekend. His wife immediately gets ideas and drives him to the local adult toy store. He goes along with it amiably at first as the wife, under the pretext of testing out and trying on the equipment, gets him more and more kinked up, right there in the store. And he loves it. What more can be said? But what was really sneaky about this story was the dialogue--the continual wifely "Yes dears," so indicative of normalcy, that serve to pacify the puzzled husband on his descent into submissionville. Also, kudos to the author for not describing the couple much physically, which made it easy for the reader to imagine whomever they wanted in the roles. Even if you don't do kink, read this one for the humor. The Reality of Virtual Possession [A] Author: Tigger Address: tigger@alices.com Here's another story in which a man is topped, this time by a computer program. A scientist with a PhD in cybernetics builds a Virtual Environment Immersion Device consisting of a series of electrodes taped along his skull and body, which allow him to experience being the slave of a domina known as "Mistress Ellen" in a dungeon setting, complete with chains. After flogging, caning, and coring, he emerges from the program triumphantly refreshed, and we find out the REAL reason why he's built such an elaborate and expensive setup. As in all of Tigger's endings, it's a surprise and completely unexpected. The writer seemed a little concerned about not catching the femdom feel in this story; but as a reader, I couldn't really judge. Certainly the story proved that dominas and their male slaves Are People Too, in capitol letters. But then, femdom stories, unless they're humorous, are always hard for me to get into, as I just can't imagine why a man would want a woman's abuse. In my experience, men are far more likely to be abusive of women, especially in the area of returning their phone calls. Do I jest? Website Review: Erotic Fiction by Magician Site owner: Magician (s.a.m.) Address: http://www.psynet.net/chameleon Reviewed: 9/28/98 Magician has done an overhaul of this site over the summer, replacing the old cartoon-style graphics with a sophisticated black and red scheme including gargoyle heads and titles in fancy script. The change is for the good. The name too, has changed from The Magic Kingdom of Fantasy Realms (though the URL is the same) which is even better, as the previous name may have turned up in web searches for information on Disneyland, prompting concerned parents to go for their guns. This site featured about 10 short stories, 8 "novellas" (though the total word count put them closer to the short story form), some poems, and an editorial about sexual fantasy. Reading it, I got a peek into the author's ethos: sexual fantasy, no matter how "kinky" it gets, is the sign of a normally functioning creative mind. There was a sort of embarrassment or apology about this statement, however (which may be due to the fact that it was slightly overwritten) and the overall feeling I got is that Magician is not as comfortable with writing and reading this stuff as he or she says. But on to the stories, of which I chose three short and three long to make my review. All were quick and easy to read, most first person, and are written in the chatty tone of a lot of those BBS confessional stories Articera used to post or the first-hand experience column of any sex magazine. That is, they all seem to have been written by the same person, even though that person is a young woman in one story and a middle-aged divorced man in another. All ponder the very questions Magician asks, of which the main one is, Why am I driven to act out in such kinky ways? In "Seduction" the narrator is a divorced man sharing a YMCA room with a young man who introduces him to gay sex and heals some of his bitter psychic wounds, and in "Hot Chat" it's a chat room nut who has cybersex with another man who dominates him. In "Daylight Dreaming" it's a straight man who fantasizes about fucking his neighbor after catching a glimpse of her naked through her apartment blinds--they wind up going at it in a lady's room stall. (I'd like to know what is so sexy about the smell of industrial-strength Lysol.) Another straight man--boy, rather--conjures up a spirit for sex in "Black Magic" and in "Shadow Walking," which also has an occult theme, a vampire who may Lestat's down-home Southern brother tries to seduce a beautiful belle, the reincarnation of his long-lost love, in a plot reminiscent of the old daytime soap "Dark Shadows." The sex in all of these stories was pretty hot; the author knows the stuff when it comes to sex scenes. As stories, however, he or she could have rounded them out better and given them more realism. For example, in "Hot Chat" the cybersex the two guys have has more in common with phone sex rather than the flubs, misspellings, and interrupted word flows of cybersex, which has to be typed. (For a good example of cybersex, read Mandibles' or Assmaster McStuff's work.) And in "Seduction," which is an otherwise excellent story, the narrator seems stuck in the world of 1962 when wives had fat-dull-boring-old names (to paraphrase a Monty Python skit) like Judy and have never worked outside the home even though they are childless. Somehow--and I admit it may be me--the straight sex in these stories just didn't pack the whallop the BDSM gay sex did, which is where Magician's writing really shines. "Surrender," which is about the sojourn of a young college grad in New Orleans, bears this out; it's almost straight kink from the time he meets a domineering leather man to the time he leaves. However, the tone is very different from the other gay male stories I've read. It's more passionate in terms of its emotions, especially where sexual identity and submission are concerned. Men, both straight and gay, like sex, but they don't make that much fuss about it. This read almost like a piece of Kirk/Spock fanfic--a straight woman's fantasy of gay sex--which was borne out when the hero's asshole is deflowered in a way that reads suspiciously like a female virgin taking her first dick. On the other hand, the father-son theme of "Seduction" was true to life and handled very well; it's common fantasy among gays. Technically, the site annoyed me on two points. Number one is that the index page featured two links labeled as "Another link" and "A third one" that didn't go anywhere. Why bother to put links on your index page that don't work? Another is that the longer stories were all broken into very short sections and the multiple document-opening made them all hard to read. It especially adding to the chances of sections getting lost or cut off in transmission, as happened to one piece. It's not that hard to code long pieces of fiction in html, and most browsers let you save them as text for later reading off-line. All in all, quick, entertaining reads with some flashy kink and mild food for thought. Interface: A- Content: A Will I visit again: Yes. Comments to: ladycyrrh@aol.com Website---> http://members.aol.com/ladycyrrh -- +----------------' Story submission `-+-' Moderator contact `--------------+ | <story-submit@qz.little-neck.ny.us> | <story-admin@qz.little-neck.ny.us> | | Archive site +----------------------+--------------------+ Newsgroup FAQ | <http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/>----<http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/faq.html>