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From: losgud <lushgod@hotnomail.com>
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Subject: LAST NEW STORY--The Birthday Party
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LOSGUD SPEAKS (BRIEFLY)--10th new story posted in the 10th month.  Sorry
but this'll likely be the 
last.  I'm wasting too much time & using too many good words with these
things.  Can't seem to get half the 
stuff to show in a.s.s.m & don't seem to get near the pats on the back
as I used to.  Hope everyone's had the 
fun I've had.  Look for a complete reposting in time for Xmas.  Down
with the lights, up with the curtain, 
and on with the show!
=========================
The following is total fiction.  Any resemblance etc. is a product of
your imagination.  This work is meant as 
ADULT entertainment.  If the laws where you sit say you're too young to
read this, go away and turn 
yourself in to the thought police.  Even thinking about sex is dirty and
nasty and will warp your mind 
forever.  Go watch a movie or play a game that ends with a body count in
the high four figures.  Death and 
destruction are good clean fun.

©1997 losgud.  Personal use just fine.  Archiving okay.  Absolutely NO
for-profit use permitted.  Reposting 
without notice is frowned upon.  Tampering with the text (rewriting) is
illegal.  Copyright violations will fall 
under the jurisdiction of my principality, where the punishment is to
discourage repeat offenders.  We cut 
your fucking hands off!
=========================
M/F/F  Inc  Cons  Humor
NOTE:  Not quite so much the epic sprawl.  Managed to keep the
tangenital (ok ok--tangential) closet door 
mostly closed.  Nice bit in the basement though.  And plenty of good
clean fun for the grown-ups.  Enjoy!


THE BIRTHDAY PARTY


	My wife and I have birthdays ten days apart.  This year I decided to do
something special to 
celebrate.  Janey's was the previous Monday, mine the upcoming Thursday,
so for this weekend between I 
developed a plan.
	By the time I'd finished with the preparatory part I was feeling
physically beaten.  Hustling around 
town in all the Friday after-work traffic, and then the arrangements
with the kids nearly fell apart.  Man, I 
don't know.  It was all set up that they'd be staying overnight at our
friends' place.  Their kids and ours get 
along fine, and we've had this reciprocal agreement for well over a
year.  If anything, we were owed a few 
sleepovers.  I get there, they put up a stink, start hemming and hawing,
and in the end ask for a baby-sitting 
fee.  A stiff one.  In cash.  In advance.  Some friends!  I added to my
mental lists.  Tonight:  _hit the bank 
machine on the way home._  Tomorrow:  _lose the friends._
	My plan entailed either a nice dinner out, or else a nice dinner in.  I
had the cash in my wallet and 
the goods in the fridge.  I'd leave it up to Janey what we'd have to
eat.  For dinner, that is.  Dessert, well . . . I 
had this vague vision of donning our birthday suits and partying all
night long.  With no interruptions, or the 
hint or possibility of interruption.
	We live in about the tiniest house imaginable.  Any smaller and it'd be
a pioneer cabin on the 
prairie.  It seems fairly common that a couple's first child is regarded
as a miracle of sorts.  But I save that 
designation for our second one.  I mean, the big miracle was that we
ever managed to find the moment of 
privacy to mix together the vital ingredients.  There was talk for
awhile of having a third, but it never 
amounted to anything but talk.  
	By the time I got back from dropping the kids I was in a pretty sour
mood.  It would have been so 
much easier if my sister the super-Aunt had been able to take the kids. 
That was the original schedule, but 
then she'd begged off because of some last minute plans of her own. 
Shit, now I'd have to be getting up at 
dawn to get the kids before our friends sold them on the baby market.
	Needless to say I was not happy to see the car parked in front of our
house.  That would be Sheila.  
What was she doing over?  The thing about my sister is that she never
just popped in for a minute.  If she 
came in the door she stayed in the door for _hours_.  Janey and Sheila
can just yack and yack and yack.
	I should be glad that the two of them are such fast friends, but that's
always been a given.  They're 
the same age, a year older than me, and they first met their freshman
year in college.  I'd heard great tales of 
Janey more than three years before I met her.  Sheila brought her home
for Thanksgiving their final year, 
and I just happened to be home from my university as well.  Janey snuck
into my room and jumped my 
bone the very first night, and I've been an addict ever since.  It
wasn't until after we were married that Janey 
let it slip that she'd been badgering Sheila on my account for quite
awhile.  _So Sheila, is there another one 
like you at home, but with a dick.  Oh my, he's cute.  I think I'll take
him!_  So much for all that nonsense 
about chance, fate and free will.  Shooting fish in a barrel, that's how
I was landed.
	I get along great with Sheila.  There's always a bit of that Bossy
Older Sister Syndrome.  And the 
confusion of growing up.  First I was in love with her; she was the
perfect idol.  Then she turned into a 
yucky girl and I loathed her.  Then she turned into a yummy girl and I
entered a period of vague lust.  Now 
that we're all grown up we have one of those rare sibling
relationships.  It's not the shared history and blood 
that binds us.  I like hanging around with her because I genuinely like
her.
	Not that any of this made me any happier to see her sitting in my
livingroom.  Sitting and sitting in 
my livingroom.  After a brief greeting, the two of them continued
chatting away.  As though I hadn't come 
in.  They were hogging the sofa between them, which left me to sit in
one of the uncomfortable chairs.  
_Buy some comfortable chairs_, I noted.  I seized a pause in their
conversation to say just that.  "Hey 
Janey, how about we go out sometime and buy some chairs designed to be
sat in?"
	She graced me with a blank look, gave a quick shake of her head, then
answered, "That sounds 
good, honey.  Whatever you say, Ray.  Whatever you want."  And then they
went on talking about other 
things.  Well, what I _wanted_ . . . had nothing really to do with
chairs except as props.  Anytime the talk 
veered towards a subject that might allow me to enter in with a comment,
my comment was brushed aside 
and the conversation quickly steered elsewhere.   
	I sat around trying not to be too grim, but eventually I was fed up.  I
took to my feet and stood 
there for the longest time without being noticed.  Eventually I poked
Sheila's knee with the toe of my shoe.
	"_Hello!_  What are you doing here anyway?  I thought you had plans for
tonight."
	"I _do_," Sheila spit back crisply.
	Oh, I was in a pissy evil mood.  "Oh yea?  What? you gonna get laid or
something?"
	"As a matter of fact," she leveled a very cool gaze at me, "that's
exactly what I intend to do.  All in 
good time."
	"What's your problem Ray?" Janey came to her defense.  "If you're in a
bad mood, why don't you 
stuff it in your pocket and go away."
	I gave up.  I shrugged and left the room, heading into the kitchen for
a beer.  There were some 
snorting sounds, and then peals of laughter behind my back.
	I stormed off down into the basement to work on my project.  _Cellar_
is a more apt description 
of the space.  It's squat and chilly and damp, but it's all mine.  I
have a workbench down there, with tools.  
I'm a woodworker, or a sculptor, or something.  I don't have any
artistic pretensions, I just need a title to 
define what I do.  It involves a large hunk of tree trunk, like a
chopping block, that was one of the deluxe 
features that came with the house.  I never felt like summoning the
strength or friends to help me lug it up 
the stairs and outside.  Since then I've added to it.  Scraps of boards,
nails.  Some artists use brushes or 
chisels.  Me, I got a hammer.  It's hard to say exactly what I'm making,
or if it'll ever be finished.  I have my 
doubts.  Its purpose is pretty obvious.  When I'm about to boil, I come
down here and blow off steam.  The 
therapeutic value of banging nails with a hammer.  I envision the day
when I stand back and see it as 
complete, and then I'll haul it up and mount it out in the yard. 
Already I've given it a title.  _"My Anger, 
Dispelled."_   Of course when I consider the likelihood of the day every
arriving when everything in life 
makes me go _kissy-kissy_, the chances seem better that eventually I'll
be dead and some poor realtor will 
have to deal with this nice little house with a nightmare in the
basement.  Too big to fit through the door, too 
heavy to lift, and impossible to dismantle.  I use very serious nails,
and slather the wood first with a real 
mean hide glue.
	I went at it for about twenty minutes.  _Bang bang bam!_  Then I'd hear
little female footfalls on 
the floorboards, chatter and laughter echoing in metallic haunts down
through the ductwork.  _Bang bang 
BAM!_  A screech, a shriek, a chair being shifted. 
_BANGBANGBANGBANGBANGBANG bam._  Murmurs 
in stereo, than a single piercing giggle.  _God damndamndamndamndamn
DAMN!_  I wound up running 
out of scrap wood.
	Though I wasn't any happier, all the tension had flowed down my arms
and into my creation.  I 
took a few steps back.  _Lookin' good!_  In the current stage it
suggested a few possibilities to me.  
_Birthday party time!_  I washed my hands in the little utility sink I'd
managed to successfully install down 
there.  From there I planned to go upstairs and straight out the front
door, wordlessly.  Take a small walk.  
Grab a decent bite on the way and wind up at _Hed's_, the only bar where
all my real friends ever hang out.
	I knew in advance how that would turn out.  If I went to _Hed's_ with a
friend or two, we'd walk in 
the front door to discover that everyone in the universe I knew was
there.  The bartender would wave at me 
madly and have what I wanted ready before I got to the station.  The
jukebox would be playing exactly 
every song that I wanted to hear.  I'd hardly dare to put a quarter in
the pinball machines, because I'd wind 
up playing for half an hour off the one coin.  All the atoms of tiny
round tables would drift together as our 
crowd created a brand new element.  There would be several intriguing
people I'd never met so thrilled to 
meet me as I charmed them with my wit and intelligence.  Beautiful women
would stand up to refresh their 
drinks, turning first to ask if they could get me another.
	When I went up alone, I would enter through the back door so I could
have a clear view of 
everyone there.  Invariably there would not be a familiar face in all
the place.  I would be virtually invisible 
to the bartender, who would be surly and forgetful.  I could slip my
life's savings into the jukebox and never 
hear a song I'd played.  A game of pinball would be all three balls
instantly gone through the gap between 
the flippers.  I would remain Mr. Hydrogen, at my tiny table wherever in
the room, sitting unbonded.  Not 
only would no one talk to me, but no one would even glance my way. 
Between my second and third drink 
I would have the usual epiphany:  _why are you sitting drinking in a bar
full of people you don't know?_  
My standard recourse would be to have another round, deciding then to
either finish up and leave or answer 
_why not?_
	I was about to depart on what would certainly rise to the upper reaches
of the list of my most 
dismal birthday celebrations.  Just as I was turning to leave I was
caught by the last piece of wood I'd 
hammered on.  It stood straight out, pointing at me like an index
finger.  The stance was almost accusatory, 
but really there was something so kinetic about its placement that it
seemed more like a nag frozen in mid-
wag.  Then the whole piece spoke to me.  _Duh, dumbfuck, you're going in
the_ wrong _door!_ 
	I nearly wept on the spot.  It was the best present I'd ever received.
	I took the stairs in bounds, stopped in the hall to grab a coat from
the rack, then composed myself 
for the quick waltz through the livingroom to the front door.  
	I stepped in the room and froze.  Janey and Sheila were basically where
I'd left them.  Janey had 
slid down the sofa a bit while Sheila was kneeling on the floor in front
of her like she was tempting her with 
new shoes.  But there weren't any shoes.  The shoes were like the rest
of their clothes, tossed and scattered 
around the room.  The pair of them were absolutely naked, and Sheila's
head was burrowed between 
Janey's wide-spread thighs.
	Janey gave me a glazed sort of look, a big smile slurring the words,
"Happy Birthday baby, whyn't 
you come join the party!"  
	Sheila looked up with a glistening face long enough to say, "We're just
reliving the glory of our 
college days.  Too bad you never visited.  Janey's told me plenty about
what a talented tongue you have."
	With that she returned to Janey's crotch, while lifting her own rump
higher, widening her thighs, 
and exposing the inflamed parts of her treasure nest.  Her hands
retreated from Janey's labia to her own, 
spreading her lips in imitation.  In a narcotic whisper Janey crooned,
"Help yourself, baby, it's an open 
invitation."
	By then my nose was stuffed full with the smell of ripe pussy.  I was
instantly intoxicated and on 
the floor, scooting forward and turning on my back as I placed myself
between Sheila's knees, grabbing her 
ass and pulling her flowering lips down towards mine.  There was a
golden chalice brimming with nectar, 
and I was thirsting for every drop.  It was hard to say which movement
was more frantic, my tongue licking 
her lips or her cunt rubbing against my mouth.  I heard some muffled
words from far away that sounded 
like _Suck my clit!_ so I did.  There was an intense groan followed by
screams that I felt resounding back up 
from the very floor joists.  That would be Janey; Sheila was still on
the journey.  I grabbed the cheeks of her 
ass with both my hands and kneaded them like plump hunks of bread dough,
pulling her down, down, my 
tongue lashing back and forth from slit to clit.  Right as I felt my
reward beginning in the clenching of her 
thighs, a pair of hands started peeling off my clothes, the fingers
lingering, tracing sexy lines on every 
square inch of my revealed skin.  While a small hand grasped my big
cock, a pretty voice whispered like a 
breeze through trees, "Mmm, yea, suck your sister's cunt.  Doesn't her
pussy taste delicious?"
	That it did, and then much more so as Sheila let go, screaming and
creaming all over my face.  
Janey plunged her mouth down on my cock, taking it all the way down her
throat, pulling back up to just 
the head, sinking down and up and down and up.  I wanted to tell her to
slow down but there was no way 
for the words to leave my mouth.  Fortunately Sheila then slowly shifted
around.  And then there were four 
hands, two sets of lips and a pair of tongues lightly covering every
surface of my cock.  They were teasing 
me supremely but I didn't mind.  I still had Sheila's sex nudging
against my mouth.  I left her clit alone to 
come down from its hypersensitive state.  My tongue had plenty enough to
occupy its time, leisurely 
lapping up the spill of her juice.  But once they started giggling
together, I lashed my tongue out, tickling 
and licking her clit, nibbling it with my lips, working them together to
suck her off like crazy.  The assault 
caught Sheila by surprise and she simply _exploded_.  There was no time
for grunting and moaning, she 
went straight off _howling_.  I seriously thought she was going to
fracture my skull.  As nice a way to die as 
any, I supposed.  She rolled off me gasping and panting.  Janey looked
down at me while stroking me with 
both hands, her eyes two big supernovas, exclaiming only, "Amazing. 
Fucking _amazing!_"  I thought so.  
Janey rose up on her haunches, straddling me, then sank down, fucking me
very, very slowly, her eyes gone 
to slits, a wide thin smile on her face.  She leaned over and kissed me
deeply as Sheila began to stir, then she 
lifted herself off me.  Sheila moved over and gave my glistening cock
several long cat licks.
	Janey bent down and seized each of us by an arm and announced, "Enough
of the cake, let's move 
into the bedroom and go for the _icing_."
	They each grabbed me by the hand as we started off down the hall.  I
hung back a little, then Janey 
looked back.  "Isn't that cute?  He's checking us out."
	Flustered I muttered, "I feel like a hick in Paris.  All the sights are
_so-o_ fine."  I withdrew my 
hands and caught up, letting my hands slide down between each of their
rumps.  Cupping, squeezing, my 
middle fingers trailing up into the lushness of their labias.  "I do
believe I've died and gone to heaven."
	Sheila reached over and gave my jutting cock a squeeze.  "You still
_feel_ incredibly alive to me."
	Janey teased, "You _will_ wind up in heaven, but so far you've barely
started on the way."
	They pulled down the covers then pushed me down in the middle of the
bed, clambering in on 
either side of me and rolling my legs wide.  I thought, breathlessly,
that they were both going to go back to 
scaling old Knob Hill together again, but instead they just snuggled up
against me.  I had a thigh wedged 
between each of their thighs.  Simply lying there like that felt
exceptionally nice.  Three mouths sharing one 
kiss.  Then Janey raised up on her elbows and scooted up a little, with
Sheila quickly following.
	"Look," Janey giggled, "I'd say he's in titty heaven."  Well, that was
an accurate assessment.  There 
was all this soft flesh contrasted with stiff nipples rubbing against my
chest and brushing across my face.  I 
wound up with a breast in each hand while they crushed the other two
together so I could get both nipples 
in my mouth.  I added a note to my general list:  _buy a bigger mouth!_ 
I was going wild having two 
different types of breasts in my face at the same time.  It was like
being a little kid and discovering 
_chocolate_ ice cream--it didn't usurp vanilla as a favorite flavor,
instead expanding the sheer pleasure of 
ice cream about ten-fold.
	"Watch this," Janey told Sheila.  "Ray just loves this.  It drives him
crazy."  With that warning she 
slipped a hand between Sheila's legs, returning with fingers slick and
fragrant.  She smeared the cunt sauce 
on Sheila's nipple while Sheila reached down in imitation to double the
pleasure.  _Whoa, shit!  You can get 
ice cream hand-dipped or soft-serve!_
	Crazy?  Did someone say crazy?  The word didn't begin to describe the
way the circuits in my 
brain were frying.  I could hear them popping and hissing.  There was
stinky smoke _billowing_ out my 
ears!
	Finally Sheila moved up and around, murmuring something about wanting
to get better acquainted 
with that big fuck stick.  That was fine with me.  In all the excitement
I'd almost forgotten about it.
	No one can say I wasn't brought up right.  When someone gives you a
present, you tell them 
_thank you_ as soon as possible.  Poor Janey looked like she was a
little tired, her bottom sort of sore.  
I pulled her up figuring my face would make for a very pleasant seat. 
She sat down with a big sigh.  
Knowing I'd be in close quarters, I exaggerated the motions of my tongue
and lips.  _Oh, thank you, thank 
you thank you thank you thank you!_  It didn't take her long to squeal
_You're welcome._  The whole while 
Sheila had my cock in her mouth.  My sperm was a string of thoroughbreds
anxiously waiting to run the 
Derby.  The starting bell kept clanging away, but Sheila would never
quite let the gates lift.
	Janey slung herself off me, then crawled over to where Sheila had
rolled away on her back.  Sheila 
had her legs bent and spread.  Janey reached down with her hands and
gently parted my sister's plush pink 
gates.  I lay there watching in a stunned state.  "Wake up, Ray!  I
think Sheila wants you to fuck her now."  
Sheila smiled and swiveled her hips in agreement.
	That was enough of a wake-up call for me.  I got up and approached on
all fours.  It took me 
forever to cover the distance.  The bed seemed to have lengthened to the
size of a football field.  There's 
something about the sight of a woman willing, wanting and waiting that
makes time slow wa-a-ay down.
	Finally I reached my destination, parking my hips between her thighs. 
No doubt I could have slid 
right in without assistance from either of us, but Janey seemed to take
particular delight in playing the tour 
guide, grabbing my cock and slowly, leisurely rubbing the head all up
and down Sheila's eager parts.  "Put it 
in, Janey," she groaned, "for godsakes, _put it in!_"  Janey complied
lovingly, ending her double tease.
	"You be sure to do her good," she patted my ass while putting her
tongue in my ear.
	I always pride myself on doing it good.  Pride, of course, coming as it
does before the fall, I kept 
myself from doing it too good at first, not wanting to fall that fast. 
Sheila just locked down, her gaze on 
mine and her limbs around me.  She never said a word, and made not a
sound, not even when her mouth 
gaped open so wide her eyes were squeezed shut.  An armory was exploding
inside her, silently.  Her entire 
body went totally tense, slowly melting away into complete laxity.
	Sheila grabbed my head and began covering my lips with nippy little
kisses.  "See," she panted, "I 
told you I planned to get laid tonight!"
	Dumb me and my astonished face as it dawned on me.  "I was set up!"
	Sheila pulled out from under me, then rolled over, displaying a new
angle to her charms.  "Let me 
set you up once more."  I grabbed onto her hips as she snaked a hand
back to insert me inside again.  
	Janey pulled her fingers out of her cunt long enough to scoot over for
a closer look.  "Oh god, 
Sheila, you should see how sexy this looks.  _So hot!_  His big purple
cock sliding in and out of your red 
hot twat!  Come on baby, pump her, pump her pussy, pump her pussy full
of come!"  Janey had her free 
hand on my balls practically yanking them off while Sheila's cunt
clenched at my cock as she went off 
wilding again.  I really had no choice in the matter.  I picked up the
pace, slapping against her ass, and 
started blowing a great big load.
	I wasn't even quite finished when Janey pulled us apart, rolled Sheila
on her back, then dove 
straight in for the delights.  Sheila stretched her arms out long
towards me, "Come here and let me have a 
taste too!"  She took my cockhead in her mouth, taking down the
dwindling pulsations, and then began 
licking my entire shaft clean.  She didn't allow me the chance to get
properly soft.  Once I was raging full 
again, she sort of batted us both away.  "Now I want to watch you fuck
Janey."
	I moved up behind Janey, grabbing onto her lovely ass as I slid my way
in.  Sheila came around 
beside me, trailing her fingers all over us.  "Oh Janey, you're right,
this is such a beautiful sight."  Then she 
turned to me, "But I know a way to have an even better view."  With that
she slid underneath Janey into a 
classic sixty-nine, except that she had a cunt stuffed full of cock for
her mouth to play with.
	We played with each other like a symphony, the movements rising and
falling for what seemed 
like hours until the final climax, when we three crashed together, the
triple crescendo rattling the window 
panes and sending bits of plaster scattering from off the walls.
	We all drew up together in the bed for a mighty cuddle, one of them
having stepped up to turn out 
the light.  "Happy birthday!" Janey and I cooed at one another, turning
in unison to croon, "Birthday 
happy!" to Sheila.  Fingers slowly stroking and toes sort of kissing
sent us off to sweet sleep.
	When I eventually woke up, my head was buried beneath a pillow the way
I usually wind up 
sleeping.  I probably wouldn't have woken up so soon, but my morning
erection had wound up in a softly 
sucking mouth.  I lay there drifting in the luxurious feeling.  No one
ever quite like Janey to drive my cock 
crazy.  I could sense that we were alone, though when Sheila had gotten
up to go I couldn't tell.  I do sleep 
very soundly.  I was thinking a nice blow job would be just perfect
before I had to get up to go fetch the 
kids.  Without warning my wet cock was alone in the cool air, but then
it was sunk deep in the cushy 
warmth that no mouth can duplicate.
	The pillow was stripped away from my face.  But it was Sheila gazing
down at me with asterisks in 
her eyes.  "I'm so happy to have gotten back together with Janey," she
whimpered, "but I'm ecstatic to have 
finally gotten together with you."
	"Where is she?" I managed to ask.
	She reached over to the night stand and retrieved a note.  _Ray,_ it
read, _I've gone to get the kids.  
Will stop at my folks and stay for a late-ish lunch.  Fuck her good
again, and again and again and again!  
Love, Janey._
	"What time is it?" I gasped.
	"Why, I've just sat down to breakfast," Sheila grinned.  "Next is
brunch, then lunch promptly at 
noon, which'll probably leave plenty of time for an early afternoon
snack.  No reason to wait for birthday 
parties anymore!"

=========================
Like? Yes? No? Comments welcome. losgud@hotmail.com
=========================
I am archived at DejaNews under the "Author Name":
	lushgod@hotnomail.com

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