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Subject: {ASS} Celestial Reviews 228 - Oct 25
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Celestial Reviews 228 - October 25, 1997
Note: Since many of our stories make an issue out of breast size, I thought
the following information might be helpful:
Big Busted Women...
..can get a taxi on the worst days
..have a neat place to carry spare change
..have always been the center of the arts (art)
..make jogging a spectator sport
..can keep a magazine dry while laying in the tub
..have more negotiating power (with men shorter than them)
..usually can find leftover popcorn after a movie
..can always carry a little extra
..always float better
..know where to look first for lost earrings
..rarely lack for a slow dance partner
..have a place to set their glasses when sitting in an armless
recliner
Small Busted Women...
..don't cause a traffic accident every time they bend over in public
..always look younger
..find that dribbled food makes it to the napkin on their lap
..can always see their toes and shoes
..can sleep on their stomachs
..have no trouble sliding behind the wheel of small cars
..know that people can read the entire message on their t-shirts
..know that everything more than a mouthful is wasted
..can come late to a theater and not disrupt an entire aisle
..can take aerobic class without running the risk of knocking
themselves out
Second note: People on a.s.s.d. can pick on my anonymous reviewers all they
want, but some of them write pretty good reviews. One of them is named
Tipper and has to remain anonymous because her really boring husband has
threatened to fuck her in the ass if she embarrasses him any further. I
think it's understandable why she can't use her "real" pseudonym.
Final note: Remember: even though someone else may be posting my reviews for
me, my e-mail address is still Celeste801@aol.com.
- Celeste
"Proclivities" by Oscar Paco (threesome) 10, 10, 10
"Redeye, Sanford" by DJ (mile-high sex) 10, 10, 10
"My Down Fall" by Unknown Author (blackmail & pedophilia)
6, 8, 4
"Enigma in the Mirror" by Eli the Bearded (sci fi fairy tale sex)
9.5, 9, 9
"Another Elevator Story" by Linda (quickie in a slow elevator)
9, 8, 8
Guest Reviews:
"Oblivion Ray's Tales Numer One" by H.D. Meister (romance)
6, 4, 4
"The New Orleans" by Oscar Paco (night at a dancing club)
9, 5, 4
"Roommates" by The Wax Tadpole (mind control) 4, 5, 2
"BJ" by Biscayne (futuristic sex) 9, 5, 4
"Hell Hath No Fury" by Darkside (transgender) 9, 10, 10
Reposted Reviews:
* "Foretaste" by Uther Pendragon (romance) 10, 10, 10
* "DNA" by Stephanie (Transgender) 10, 10, 10
* "DNA II" by Stephanie (sci-fi transgender) 10, 10, 10
* "Redeye" by Tom Bombadil (semi-public sex) 10, 10, 10
"Proclivities" by Oscar Paco (OscarPaco@aol.com). The woman has had a bad
relationship, has broken up, and is about to move from the East to the West
Coast of the United States to start a new life. As a going-away present her
closest friend springs on her the "surprise" gift of an all-nighter with
herself and her husband. At first the woman turns this down, then she
discovers her inner bisexual self. The sex is very hot and heavy.
Ratings for "Proclivities"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10
"Redeye, Sanford" by DJ (103666.3074@compuserve.com). This story is a
follow-up to Tom Bombadil's "Redeye." I am reposting that review with the
hope that Tom will repost that story. Although the present story can stand on
its own, I suggest reading "Redeye" first, especially since the earlier story
is only 170 words long.
The present story is 2100 words longer than the original "Redeye." It
contains several airborn orgasms. It also suggests the potential for
"Redeye, The Series." It's an excellent story, but I can't say much more
about it without blowing the plot for you.
Ratings for "Redeye, Sanford"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10
"My Down Fall" by Unknown Author. This is a story about how a church's youth
minister first gets seduced by his female coworker and then is blackmailed by
her daughters into having frequent sex with them. The sex with the kids
isn't full penetration activity - "just" recurrent hand- and blowjobs. Kids
have to learn somewhere, and it might as well be from the kindly married man
who teaches them religion - or so the theory goes.
So unless you're already fascinated by the idea of an uninhibited 13-year-old
girl being nurtured toward her budding nymphomania, don't bother with this
story. Even if you are interested, you'll be disappointed, because the story
is obviously just the beginning of a multiple-part story; but you don't find
that out until the very end of this installment. And at that point I wasn't
really interested in looking for any more of it.
Ratings for "My Down Fall"
Athena (technical quality): 6
Venus (plot & character): 8
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 4
"Enigma in the Mirror" by Eli the Bearded (usenet-tag@qz.little-neck.ny.us).
This is a story about a young lad who becomes romantically attracted to a
lovely female creature who lives in his mirror. This notion about mirrors is
not unique to Eli. In one of Kurt Vonnegut's novels that author suggests
that mirrors are where separate universes intersect. Hence Vonnegut refers
to mirrors as "leaks"; and the phrase "take a leak" means to steal a mirror.
But I digress.
This story not quite make the top of my chart. First, there were too many
usage and spelling errors. Actually, these erorrs were not numerous; rather,
the problem was that the author invented some words on purpose and then
accidentally screwed up on others. My feeling is that authors who invent a
special language have a special responsibility when that novel language
intersects with ordinary language; otherwise, readers think the story is
introducing a new term, when it's really only a casual misspelling of an
ordinary term. Second, the story was just a little too quaint to keep me
interested.
However, these are minor problems. If you'd like to read an interesting,
quaint love story about a boy and his alien, this one may be for you.
Ratings for "Enigma in the Mirror"
Athena (technical quality): 9.5
Venus (plot & character): 9
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9
"Another Elevator Story" by Linda (lindajean@stealthmail.com). This is
another tale of sex between strangers on an elevator. It seems that even the
term "quickie" would fail to describe the haste necessary to accomplish
mutual climaxes within a 14-floor ride on the elevator (or lift, as Bronwen
would prefer); but the narrator points out that the machinery seems to be
moving slowly during this episode.
This is by no means the worst elevator sex story I have read. That
distinction belongs to "Elevator Rape" by Dark Dreamer, which received
ratings of 2, 1, 1. However, two better implementions of this fanatasy are
"One of Those Days?" by Dulcinea and Mike Hunt's "Wet T-Shirt Contest," which
somehow winds up in an elevator orgy.
Ratings for "Another Elevator Story"
Athena (technical quality): 9
Venus (plot & character): 8
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 8
"Oblivion Ray's Tales Numer One" by H.D. Meister
(dez187lm@hotmail.com). Guest Review by DG.
One thing that normally turns me off in a story is overwriting, by which I
mean anything from overly melodramatic words and metaphors to broadly-drawn
stereotypical characters. This story contains so many examples that it
actually crosses the line and becomes entertaining and humorous in a way that
the author didn't intend. Sabina is an attractive woman who, for unexplained
reasons, hasn't dated for three years. Her boss tells her to give a building
tour to a guy named Ray. When Ray shows up, Sabina realizes at once that
he's different from all the other boring suits she works with. Maybe it's
his black clothes and long pony tail. Or his posture, which "was not
perfect, yet it spoke loudly of the raw strength he possessed." Anyway, they
hit it off. Eventually she gets invited over to his place, and that's when
the strange metaphors and descriptions really start to fly. Read the
description of Ray's house, and then see if you can picture it in your mind's
eye:
"It was far enough from the city to have a touch of cozy
about it, but it also had a hardness which was there if
one could see it. It was three stories high and sported a
bark blue siding material. The yard was well kept, and the
trees looked healthy and content. Yet even they had
something akin to a darkness about them."
If you like the outside, you'll love the inside. After some flirting and
foreplay, which includes an expert massage from Ray, Sabina starts to get
turned on. Naturally, this causes "her cunt to unleash a torrent of its
nectar into her satin panties." Instead of running to get a mop, Ray strips
down and makes quite an impression of his own:
"She cast her gaze downward, and settled it upon what she
would come the call the mother of all dicks. It was easily
eight inches long, and appeared to be close to two inches
thick. It hung from his loins, yet even then she knew not
to judge. It was the cock of a man: strong and confident
in its abilities. There was no need for it to stand
straight, bolstering itself with false bravado, for it
knew full well its abilities... and limitations."
Not only does Ray's cock have a becoming modesty, it's also yummy:
"He had a different taste than the cocks she could remember.
They tasted of animal musk; Ray tasted of man, with a
light dusting of lust added to enhance its already sublime
flavor."
As it turns out, Ray's cock has no need to be modest - it really delivers the
goods. He fucks Sabina like a madman and then, when he finally ejaculates,
"It was as if a great dragon had inhaled, then spewed white flame from its
giant maw." Ouch - sounds like Ray needs to visit the clinic. Enough said.
This story reads like it was written by a Harlequin Romance writer on LSD.
I'm actually recommending it to anyone who needs a good laugh.
Ratings for "Oblivion, Ray's Tales Numer One" (Yes, there's a
typo in the title)
Athena (technical quality): 6
Venus (plot & character): 4
DG (appeal to reviewer): 4 (on its merits) 10 (as unintended
humor)
"The New Orleans" by Oscar Paco (OscarPaco@aol.com). Guest
review by Dart.
Lene and Ganzalo are married, but their marriage has hit a rocky stretch of
road. Lene's in a funk, and even gives her husband the cold shoulder when he
attempts talking with her. This behavior persists for several days, and,
needless to say, Ganzalo is becoming a little stressed by the situation.
Then one Saturday, Lene thinks she has the solution. They'll go dancing.
Despite his not liking to dance, Ganzalo agrees because he's a very
understanding husband, and he hopes it will help in lifting Lene out of her
funk. On the way to the New Orleans, a jazz and blues club, Ganzalo admires
Lene's provocative dress, but, because of her current moodiness, declines to
discuss with her her intentions for the evening.
At the club, Lene quite understandably wants to dance. Alas, Ganzalo declines
her request to dance, and so, with a touch of revenge in her soul, Lene
begins to dance alone. She's an excellent dancer, graceful and sensuous. She
attracts attention, especially Stephen's attention. They start dancing
together. It's a pretty steamy dance. I needn't go further, except to say
that everyone's pleased with the evening's outcome. And hopefully, Lene's out
of her funk.
I liked this story, but a few passes through the hands of one of Celeste's
proofreaders might have made it a much better story. The technical quality
would have been improved, even though it's not especially bad as it is, just
enough to occasionally make its presence felt.
The plot was quite good, except for a detail of Lene's behavior at the
conclusion of her dance with Stephen, but the characters never quite came to
life for me. This was too bad, because I think the characters were there,
just below the surface. A few more sentences here and there could have
fleshed them out. Once again, one of Celeste's proofreaders could have
helped.
Ratings for "The New Orleans"
Athena (technical quality): 8
Venus (plot & character): 7
Dart (appeal to reviewer): 7
"Roommates" by The Wax Tadpole (wax_tadpole@hotmail.com). Guest review by
Sven the Elder.
I have this difficulty you see. Celeste always phrases her requests for
'help' with reviews so nicely. It's the "As usual, if for any reason you
don't want to review this story, just say so.", that makes me nerve myself
not to refuse. In fact the only one I have turned down was because I knew the
author concerned, and, unlike our good Celeste, I didn't trust myself to be
totally objective.
Which brings me back to this story - it uses Mind Control in the form of
hypnotism. This is not one of the story genre's I would normally read, but I
figure that Celeste can give it a go, therefore I ought to as well. In the
past I have reviewed at least one story that I would otherwise not have read.
I'm not ashamed to admit I enjoyed it; perhaps there is a message there for
reading things we 'think' we do not like. Perhaps - I still don't like to be
'squicked'!
Wax Tadpole admits in his introduction for the reviewer that this is his
first story, - "please be gentle". Well I'll try, 'John'. But it's going to
be a little difficult. One of our other very good authors pointed out
recently in a very good discussion on a.s.s.d (OK I admit I only lurked!)
that a storyteller has some obligations towards his readers. Poor grammar,
sentence construction, and an obvious need to be otherwise 'proofread' come
pretty high on the list, but one of the chief requirements is that a story
should be able to either, be 'believable' or, 'suspend belief in a believable
way'. Sadly this story does not meet those obligations. I wanted to enjoy
this story. This is not a good thing for a reviewer to admit, but I don't
like giving poor reviews.
The story revolves around hypnotism. The plot is a little thin, and the mind
control and descriptions don't ring true. Boy is encouraged to hypnotise one
of the two girl roommates; Surprise! Surprise! Both succumb, both allow
themselves to be 'molested' against their will, neither remembers a thing.
Yes of course. But I think not - it comes across as a juvenile fantasy and
fails to excite or interest.
Sorry it left me quite cold and in the end I just skimmed through. At the
very least please subject it to the proofreading and help service that
Celeste offers. It might yet work, but not as it stands.
Ratings for "Roommates"
Technical quality: 4
Plot & character: 5 (there are possibilities there)
Sven (appeal to reviewer): 2
"BJ" by Biscayne (Biscayne@ix.netcom.com). Guest review by Kim.
Well, here we are all set to go on my 22nd review. Celeste has sent me a new
author to read, no less. Since he's a virgin, I guess I should go easy.
Wouldn't want to put him off this for life, it's such an important time of
progress and nurturing.
Nah, screw that... I hated the story. There, that's a surprise opening, for
me at least. I'm not normally quite so vituperative this early on in a
review.
This purports to be a prolog to a full blown novel, supposedly waiting in the
wings to launch upon an unsuspecting public. I soon started to have my
misgivings as I read the wonderfully pompous introduction. It reminded me of
me.
Set in a future high-tech wizzy world, it tells the story of BJ, a Chief Exec
of a sex empire. She gets home from a long day's orgying and listens to her
messages. They tell her another impending orgy is scheduled for later that
evening at her house. In the meantime BJ reminisces about the sex she had
today with one of her personal assistants, Kelly - a submissive who wishes to
learn how to have good lesbian sex, since so far she has been taught only how
to have heterosexual sex by her brutish boyfriend and his friends.
Long, tedious descriptions of degradation and apparent pleasure follow.
Endless references to anal sex and the desire for pain litter the
proceedings. After that's all finished we return to BJ contemplating her
past, and indeed the recent general history of America.
This slow, laborious, and ridiculously unlikely future history grinds the
story to an abrupt close - presumably to be continued in the next part of the
novel.
So, to the conclusion. An interesting future world has been created, but it's
peopled by the most robotic of characters I've had the misfortune to come
across in a long time. None of them has any soul, nor humanity, nor
believability. Now it might be that this is precisely what the author
intended. To create a race of automatons living in an artificial world.
Unfortunately I suspect he's just not very good at creating believable
characters. Also the whole thing is shot through with the most unpleasant
misogyny. It's hard to read without wincing. I think the story can best be
summed up by one of its own lines:
"The girl had been pretty good for being a novice, but a bit too mechanical"
Ratings for "BJ" by Biscayne@ix.netcom.com
Athena (technical quality): 9 (It was at least readable, even if I
didn't like what I was reading)
Venus (plot & character): 5 (How it's possible to make S&M
orgies so dull is amazing)
Kim (appeal to reviewer): 4 (Misogyny gone berserk)
"Hell Hath No Fury" (a complete, three part novel, long), by Darkside.
(Darkside@nym.alias.net).
{The following guest review of Part One was written by Green Onions, who has
posted several stories on this newsgroup. (This review was posted in
Celestial Reviews 196, July 5 1997) See Vickie Tern below for how Part One
relates to the whole novel as finally completed.}
* "Hell Hath No Fury" [novella] by Darkside. A driver has a flat tire on a
lonely road. Spare to change? Sorry, none in the trunk. Night falls on the
man without a plan.
The stars blink brightly in the clear black sky as his chances of surviving
begin to flicker out. Snow appears. Lost and alone, he waits for the end of
his life in the white darkness.
And yet when all optimism seems to have faded into the freezing wilderness
there emerges (from behind a hidden chorus of weeping violins) a vision of
hope that flies gracefully across the horizon of his dimming consciousness,
singing its mystical song, ready to deftly snatch the hapless wayfarer from
the drooling unflossed Jaws of Death.
Is it a bird? A plane? An optical illusion? No--it's Florence Nightingale:
_after_ she graduated from medical school.
And so not a moment too soon is the Grim Reaper's task interrupted by the
talents of a skilled, sensitive, tall, brilliant, blue-eyed, lithe busty rich
young female physician with near-perfect abs.
She first asks the nurse to check his insurance. Then she saves his life.
And so the dream continues. They fall for each other; he proposes to her.
Their engagement progresses like clockwork to the final misty moment as
family, friends, and myriad onlookers gather to witness the anticipated
instant when he will place the golden ring of their sacred unity upon her
willing finger.
It seems that all is right with the world. Surely they will love out their
lives in an era of peace, happiness, hot sex, low taxes, and white picket
fences.
Well, as one of Douglas Adam's characters once said in _The Hitchhiker's
Guide to the Galaxy_: "Sorry, wrong universe!"
As the sun beats down on the expectant crowd he explains that he does not
love her and cannot marry her. Her parents are glaring hatefully, she is
sobbing pitifully and he is shrugging philosophically. Better luck next time.
Or better sense, perhaps. Because the Doctor was a dream and he needs someone
real. Not a vision but a spouse. Not a fantasy, but flesh and soul. And after
two long years he finds and marries her with little hesitation. The second
time is indeed the charm--even if her stomach isn't quite as flat, she is
still young and attractive, affectionate, smart, tall and slim.
But what of his first love, of the brilliant blue-eyed shapely svelte angel
of the steel table who had saved his life, savored his love, and was
jilted--indeed brutally humiliated--in front of her friends and family?
Hell, if you thought biblical characters tend to suffer more than others for
spurning the affections of the smooth-faced gender, read this story and think
again!
And what could be a more fitting punishment for an ungrateful insensitive,
thoughtless and callously cruel male jerk than to be forced to suffer the
indignities of _becoming_ a woman? His fate will not be limited to the
experience of being in a female body, but will also include the
transformation of his mind.
Yes, She will have her way with him. She will make his dream into her
nightmare. And in more than one respect.
This is not an ordinary TG (trans-gender) piece, nor is it a classic sex
story or a typical tale of revenge, mystery--yes there is a
murder--cumuppance (gee, did I misspell that?), or even an ironic, slightly
humorous psychological sci-fi erotic thriller. It's all of those bound
together with a tight plot and topped off with a tempting smorgasbord of
diverse sexual blandishments.
In case you thought I might be blowing my load prematurely, I should also
point out that this piece could be even better if the author diverged from
some typical tendencies of erotica and romance writers (including most a.s.s.
contributors). For starters I might occasionally prefer to see characters in
longer stories developed with a third dimension--the sorts of accents,
nuances, habits, hobbies, mannerisms, peculiarities and idiosyncrasies that
we typically observe in real people. Such details can often be worked into
plots with little effort.
While Darkside's prose is better than most, I also sometimes wish a.s.s.
writers would pause more often to allow their readers to "smell the roses"
(or hear the cadences) of their phrases and the rhythm of their sentences.
Words can do more than convey information.
And although I am often at odds with the well-worshipped deity who is hosting
this review, she and I agree on one thing: maybe there is room for
protagonists whose bodies are not quite so heavenly. If one goal of erotica
is to help us appreciate love and sexuality, then perhaps a.s.s. authors
could provide us with a few (especially female) characters now and then who
just happen to fall short of certain popular physical ideals.
Yet I quibble . . . this is an _excellent_ novella. Read it.
Venus (plot & character): 10
Athena (technical quality): 10
Green Onions (appeal to reviewer): 10
Introductory comment on the whole novel as now posted, by Vickie Tern:
This is one of the more remarkable productions, I think, of net fiction in
general and TG fiction in particular. It's an ambitious full-scale novel,
with a complex plot, the narrative evolving for the reader out of various
characters' distinctive points of view -- their so-called "first person"
narratives. These commentaries and reports overlap and conflict with each
other, leaving the reader to construct what is *really* happening as if the
story were a gigantic mosaic made up of many pieces, each partial, some
bewildered, many just plain wrong. Yet while individual characters may be
variously misled and the reader with them, the story is never really
confusing. Gradually and inexorably, as with any good
detective-fantasy-mystery story, the truth emerges.
The original deceptions are all part of a deliberate plot schemed by a
brilliant woman scientist overwhelmed by a desire to avenge herself on a
fiance who has spurned her, and they are multiplied by other characters with
schemes of their own. They're further multiplied because the scientist has
found ways to alter human beings, to transform them physically -- but not
mentally -- into replicas of each other, so characters may not be perfectly
certain, at a given moment, whether the person with them is an original or a
more malevolent facsimile. This makes for considerable irony and suspense, a
story taking place in a world of mirror images where nothing may be what it
seems. Yet for the reader, what is happening is always clear - if not
accurate -- and how a character feels and thinks about it is always what the
reader knows first of all. So there's a considerable range of experience
explored here, and characters who vary from bright and brassy to solemn and
pompous. There is less eroticism than one might expect, but the story does
crucially involve transgendered transformations and the pointed revenge of a
woman scorned in love, so readers of A.S.S. won't feel disappointed. In
short, in plain language, for a variety of reasons this is a good read.
Most extraordinary perhaps is that this novel is a first production of a new
and talented writer, one with an special gift for dialogue that sounds spoken
by real people and narrative that remains economical -- there is nothing
arbitrary or dithering, padded or merely amusing filling out the novel's
length. It's long because it needs to be.
And it's entirely the author's. At early stages I advised on routine matters
like narrative format, queried conceivable contradictions, and as the story
developed and his narrative strategy came clear, provided early comment. The
novel's intricate plan was hatched entirely inside the author's imagination
from the start, so there was little for me to do as various parts were
written other than to encourage him to keep going, announce what I thought
was happening and be told "No, wait, you'll see!" What *was* happening then
always turned out to be both more surprising and yet more inevitable than I'd
thought. That made it a fun read too.
So, this is an intricate narrative involving much deception and
double-dealing, told by characters who don't themselves necessarily know what
is really happening as they speak. It is best enjoyed by being read in the
order intended, if at all possible with no episodes skipped. I suggest you
assemble it first, then plunge into its dark transmogrifications.
Part One, posted June 1997, is called "Hell Hath No Fury" and totals
altogether about 124k. It sets out the first baffling consequence of the
diabolical plot, as it is experienced by the main characters. (Celestial
Reviews 196 July 5, 1997, review by Green Onions reprinted above)
Part Two, just posted, is called "The Birth of Nemesis" and is about 98k.
It presents some of the antecedent action to Part One, as a "Prequel,"
making clearer that things in Part One were not at all what they seemed
(nor even some things in Part Two). Mostly it explains how things in Part
One came to pass.
Part Three, just posted, is called "Kat O' Nine Tales" and is nearly 500k
long. It continues the story from where Parts One and Two left it, and is
told altogether from the alternating points of view of each of the
participants. By the end of Part Three you will finally know what has
*really* been happening in Parts One and Two -- and Three -- and its outcome.
And you will have read an absorbing sci-fi-mystery-suspense-thriller with
some memorable moments. The author (Darkside@nym.alias.net) already has
another novel in mind, and with the right encouragement will share it with
us. The right encouragement comes in the form of e-mail letting him know
what you really think of this. He can handle and learn from negative
comment, so don't stint. Of course, praise is never inappropriate. :-)
Ratings for "Hell Hath No Fury" (Complete Novel)
Athena (technical quality): 9 (picky picky, but needs one last utterly
exhausting edit)
Venus (plot and character): 10 (lots of both)
Tern (overall appeal): 10 (gripping, not sexy)
The complete novel can be found at
http://www.nifty.org/nifty/transgender under Magic-SciFi
or Sapphire's website at http://www1.mhv.net/sapphire
or to go right to it http://www1.mhv.net/sapphire/zip/furytril.zip
* "Foretaste" by Uther Pendragon (anon584c@nyx.net). Bob and Jeanette are
continuing with their journey through life. This story is heavily laced with
the realities of existence. They have partially overcome their financial
problems, but now they are faced with the decision of deferring Jeanette's
education even longer while they have a baby and begin to raise a family.
Their sex life continues to be a unitive force in their lives. Some
activities they have found wanting and have discarded, and some they have
found wanton and have retained them.
Here's a sex-related word that appears in this story for probably the first
time ever on this newsgroup: "blastula", as in, "We had entered into another
relationship. Our child was not yet born, not even a fetus, but -- at most
-- a blastula." Just thought you might like to know.
Ratings for "Foretaste"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10
* "DNA" by Stephanie. (Reposted by who@why.not). About every two weeks I get
an e-mail message from someone saying, "I know you don't like TG stories, but
would you mind reviewing this one?" Actually, my record with TG stories is
pretty good: I think I've read six of them and rated all of them 8 or better.
The reason I don't review more of them is simply a matter of time: there are
a lot of other stories that I need to read and review. In addition, the good
TG stories that I've read have been rather long - but worthwhile.
What appeals to me most about these stories is that they tend to be clever:
they examine interesting "what if" possibilities in creative ways. "DNA,"
like several other TG stories explores the question, "What would it be like
if a man were suddenly transposed into a woman's body?" These role-reversal
stories almost always look at how a guy (or girl) feels when he/she is forced
to deal with events from the perspective of the previously opposite gender.
This is fun, but the basic plot has been tried many times, and it could
become boring. What seems to make the idea persist is that authors look for
creative complications to interject into the plot. This story has several
creative ideas.
At the beginning of the story the young man gets turned into a clone of his
female boss's beautiful teenage niece by a genetically engineered virus that
alters the recipient's DNA. The first interesting complication is that when
the boss needs someone to look after the guy/girl while she's away from the
house, the only eligible candidate is the niece herself. So we have the
guy/girl being looked after by a girl who is essentially his/her genetic
twin. Next the guy/girl gets seduced by the boss's boyfriend. Not too
unusual so far - but suddenly it becomes apparent that the virus can be
sexually transmitted, and so the boyfriend starts to mutate into another
clone of the niece. "Fortunately," the mad scientist manages to inject a
different strand of DNA into her soon-to-be-former boyfriend. This
terminates his transformation midway - so this guy/girl has the upper body of
a woman and the lower body of a man, but a different man than his original
self. (Incidentally, all intellectual powers seem to remain those of the
original owners, although emotions tend to shift with the body parts.)
Interestingly, I found several points in this story when a character became
angry and could have shouted to someone else, "You can just go and fuck
yourself!" This could be taken as a literal rather than metaphorical
statement - in more ways than one. You'll have to read the story to figure
out what I'm talking about. One unrealistic element is that when Julie gets
transformed to Jim, her brain continues to reside in her head, instead of
where it resides in most men. <chortle, chortle>
If, like most Americans, you had a really bad biology course in high school,
you will have the good fortune of thinking that the biological aspects of the
story are at least remotely realistic. On the other hand, if you are like
most a.s.s. readers (intellectually as well as sexually acute and inclined to
be skeptical about simplistic ideas) or went to school in New Zealand, you'll
realize that even if viruses and DNA worked the way they do in this story,
the rest of the human body wouldn't. Don't let that bother you. Consider
the story to be science fiction, and know only what the author wants you to
know.
Perhaps I'm making this sound too complex - almost silly. That's the value
of a story like this - it IS silly, but silly in a very clever way. I'm not
going to tell you any more about the plot. Read it yourself. I'm pretty
sure the virus cannot be transmitted through the Internet - except for AOL
users using Windows 95. In that case, however, you already have problems
that are much more serious than having your gender changed.
Ratings for "DNA"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10
* "DNA II" by Stephanie (an266891@anon.penet.fi). This is a sequel to
Stephanie's "DNA," to which I gave very favorable ratings several months ago.
The present story can stand alone, but it is easier to understand and enjoy
if you have read the previous story. In particular, some of the explanations
at the end of the story may be easier to grasp if you have read "DNA I."
Stephanie plans to repost both stories soon.
As "DNA II" begins, Paul has been changed into a half-male, half-female
person by his girlfriend Anne, a genetic engineer who became upset at Paul
for running around with other women. Paul's objective is to return to his
original body, and while pursuing this goal he is faced with several
interesting obstacles. The story runs parallel to many popular, non-sexual,
science fiction stories. For example, the Incredible Hulk possesses unusual
powers but wants to rid himself of those powers, and in his attempts to
return to normal he encounters new problems in each episode. Paul's
situation is similar to the Hulk's, but his problems center on sexual
situations - giving head to a cop to avoid a traffic arrest, falling in love
with his young female roommate, etc. All of this takes place against a
background of scientific information that is probably impossible - but which
is realistic enough to non-scientists like myself to make it all seem
plausible.
The story is not a simple sexual odyssey; rather Paul's problems and
adventures are set in the context of a police vs. drug peddler drama. The
villains are selling drugs; Paul stumbles into them; and the bad guys try to
use the DNA power to transform people from one body to another in order to
further their evil purposes. Paul gets caught up with these criminals, and
other people have their genders switched. Paul's goal is to get out of this
mess and to see to it that the bad guys get their comeuppance. I won't spoil
the story for you by telling you all the details. It's a good story, and you
should read it for yourself. {"DNA III" is scheduled for release some time
next year.}
Ratings for "DNA II"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10
* "Redeye" by Tom Bombadil (stbush@iglou.com). This author has decided that
since Deirdre has stopped writing stories, he'll try to take over for her.
To accomplish this, he has decided to write very short stories in which the
narrator routinely discloses absolutely astonishing sexual behaviors that
will throw the reader for a loop. However, "Redeye" is not a Deirdre story,
nor is it even Sherwood Anderson. This story suggests that this author is
the reincarnation of Saki (H.H. Munro)! Look that one up in your Funk and
Wagnalls! Even though it will take you longer to find and download this
story than it will take to read it, it's a very good story.
Ratings for "Redeye"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10
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