Note: This story was dynamically reformatted for online reading convenience. Dr. Des Troy-Aarr's "A PREGNANT WOMAN'S GUIDE TO...SMOKING" (no sex, humor) by this guy (thisguy.1066@gmail.com) Summary: Good reasons for pregnant women to smoke... Everybody seems to have advice for pregnant women these days. Unfortunately much of it is wrong. This guide focuses on separating the facts from fiction about smoking while pregnant. 1. Smoking during pregnancy will NOT CAUSE a healthy woman to give birth prematurely or to an under-weight baby. The odds of this happening to you are as follows; --- If you are healthy (i.e. no high blood pressure, no diabetes, no high cholesterol), of normal weight, and were between the ages of twenty and thirty when the baby was conceived: 0.9% --- If you are healthy (i.e. no high blood pressure, no diabetes, no high cholesterol), of normal weight, and were between the ages of thirty and forty when the baby was conceived: 1.1% --- If you are healthy (i.e. no high blood pressure, no diabetes, no high cholesterol), of normal weight, and were over forty when the baby was conceived: 1.5% --- If you are healthy (i.e. no high blood pressure, no diabetes, no high cholesterol), of normal weight, and were under the age of fifteen when the baby was conceived: 3.6% --- If you are overweight, but otherwise healthy (i.e. no high blood pressure, no diabetes, no high cholesterol), and were between the ages of twenty and forty when the baby was conceived: 3.9% --- If you are overweight, but otherwise healthy (i.e. no high blood pressure, no diabetes, no high cholesterol), and were between the ages of fifteen and twenty when the baby was conceived: 4.1% --- If you are overweight, but otherwise healthy (i.e. no high blood pressure, no diabetes, no high cholesterol), and were under the age of fifteen when the baby was conceived: 4.4% --- If you are of normal weight, and have health issues (i.e. high blood pressure, diabetes, high cholesterol, etc.), and were under the age of fifteen when the baby was conceived: 4.6% --- If you are of normal weight, and have health issues (i.e. high blood pressure, diabetes, high cholesterol, etc.), and were between the ages of fifteen and twenty when the baby was conceived: 4.7% --- If you are of normal weight, and have health issues (i.e. high blood pressure, diabetes, high cholesterol, etc.), and were between the age of twenty and thirty when the baby was conceived: 4.9% --- If you are of normal weight, and have health issues (i.e. high blood pressure, diabetes, high cholesterol, etc.), and were between the age of thirty and forty when the baby was conceived: 5.2% --- If you are overweight, and have health issues (i.e. high blood pressure, diabetes, high cholesterol, etc.), and were under the age of fifteen when the baby was conceived: 5.3% --- If you are overweight, and have health issues (i.e. high blood pressure, diabetes, high cholesterol, etc.), and were between the ages of fifteen and twenty when the baby was conceived: 5.4% --- If you are overweight, and have health issues (i.e. high blood pressure, diabetes, high cholesterol, etc.), and were between the ages of twenty and thirty when the baby was conceived: 5.7% --- If you are overweight, and have health issues (i.e. high blood pressure, diabetes, high cholesterol, etc.), and were between the ages of thirty and forty when the baby was conceived: 6.3% 2. Smoking during pregnancy WILL result in less weight gain. Women who smoke while pregnant on average gain 10% less weight than women who don't smoke while pregnant. The bulk of that differential occurs in parts of the body that aren't essential to giving birth to the baby (i.e. arms, legs, hands, feet, etc.) or provided sustenance to the baby (i.e. breasts). 3. Smoking during pregnancy WILL NOT CAUSE the baby to be born with birth defects. While it is a sad truth that some babies are born with birth defects the percentage of babies born with birth defects is exactly the same whether the mother did or did not smoke during her pregnancy. Birth defects are a result of a combination of genetics and the mother's exposure to heavy metals (i.e. lead, mercury, cadmium, etc.) during pregnancy. 4. Smoking during pregnancy WILL NOT CAUSE the baby to be ugly. 98% of a baby's looks is determined by genetics. The other 2% is determined by a woman's age when the baby was conceived. Statistically, the younger a woman is when she conceives a baby the better looking the baby will be. 5. Smoking during pregnancy WILL NOT CAUSE the baby to be dim-witted. While it is a sad truth that some babies will be born dim-witted, the percentage of babies born dim-witted is exactly the same whether the mother did or did not smoke during her pregnancy. Dim-wittedness is a result of a combination of genetics, the mother's exposure to heavy metals (i.e. lead, mercury, cadmium, etc.), and excessive alcohol consumption (getting drunk two or more times per week) during pregnancy. A significant percentage of the world's top scientists have mothers who smoked through their pregnancies. 6. A woman who smokes during pregnancy SLIGHTLY increases the chances that her child will take up smoking at a younger age. Not that a child starting smoking is necessarily a bad thing... The odds of a child taking up smoking are as follows; --- Child starts smoking before 6th birthday: smoked during pregnancy .02%, didn't smoke during pregnancy .004% --- Child starts smoking at age 6: smoked during pregnancy .05%, didn't smoke during pregnancy .009% --- Child starts smoking at age 7: smoked during pregnancy .06%, didn't smoke during pregnancy .01% --- Child starts smoking at age 8: smoked during pregnancy .09%, didn't smoke during pregnancy .02% --- Child starts smoking at age 9: smoked during pregnancy .14%, didn't smoke during pregnancy .08% --- Child starts smoking at age 10: smoked during pregnancy .63%, didn't smoke during pregnancy .28% --- Child starts smoking at age 11: smoked during pregnancy 2.9%, didn't smoke during pregnancy 2.1% --- Child starts smoking at age 12: smoked during pregnancy 3.8%, didn't smoke during pregnancy 3.4% --- Child starts smoking at age 13: smoked during pregnancy 5.4%, didn't smoke during pregnancy 4.9% --- Child starts smoking at age 14: smoked during pregnancy 5.4%, didn't smoke during pregnancy 5.3% --- Child starts smoking at age 15: smoked during pregnancy 3.9%, didn't smoke during pregnancy 4.2% --- Child starts smoking at age 16: smoked during pregnancy 3.8%, didn't smoke during pregnancy 4.1% --- Child starts smoking at age 17: smoked during pregnancy 3.1%, didn't smoke during pregnancy 3.4%