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 DISCLAIMER:
This story is intended exclusively for open-minded adults.  If you're
under 18, you'd be better served exercising your own imagination rather
than being corrupted by mine.  This story is purely a work of fiction, and
the actions described herein are not condoned, encouraged or even
considered morally acceptable by the author.  This story may be reposted as
long as it is unaltered and unedited (including this disclaimer), and as

long as credit is given to the author.

   My Family Sucks

   By Small Wonder

   My family sucks.  Seriously, they totally suck.  Like I thought they
were normal and cool and that everyone's family is like us, but it turns
out that my parents are total fucking prudes.  I mean, when I first found
out about Robyn's family, I thought they were the freaks, but now that I
know about Alex's family and the Dawsons and Trina's family and Julie's
four uncles and David's crazy ass family reunion last summmer, I realize my
family are the freaks.  I mean, me and my eleven year-old sister Monica
have had sex with so many of my friends and my friends' parents and other
families and that's like totally normal to me now, but I've never seen my
dad naked, and I've only seen my mom naked once when I was 8.

   And, ok, so Mom and Dad don't do it with us.  Fine.  I mean, I'd love to
suck on Mom's tits now that I can appreciate it, but she totally wouldn't
ever let me since I'm not a baby anymore.  And, you know, I could suck off
Dad when he gets all pissed off about what the President did or didn't do
or whatever.  I mean, that stuff doesn't even affect him, but it still gets
him all angry and annoyed and I have to listen to some political lecture I
don't understand.  Wouldn't it be easier if I could just go down on him?

   But like I said, they don't.  That's no big deal, if they don't want to,
they don't want to.  But at least let us have some fun, right?  But last
week, when mom walked in on me and my sister Monica 69-ing in the basement,
it was like worse than if we were caught stealing cars or selling nukes to
Al-Qaeda or something.

   I mean, what a bunch of hypocrites!  Dad gave me the birds-and-bees
speech when I turned 13, and he was all "look, I know you're going to go
out there and have fun, just make sure you play safe," so it's not like he
minds me fucking, right?  And Monnie got the speech from Mom two months ago
when she turned 11!  And apparently Mom was like "sex isn't bad, but take
it from me, you want to wait for someone you really love."

   And you know what?  I love my sister and she loves me, and we were
playing it safe.  First of all, it was just oral (or at least, that's all
that Mom saw).  Second, Monnie hasn't even started getting her periods yet,
so she's not gonna get pregnant.  And third, the basement is totally safer
than sneaking out to the bushes behind the church.  So we had safety and we
had love and Mom and Dad still blew a fucking gasket!

   And the worst part?  Apparently it's all my fault.  Just 'cuz I'm
fifteen and a guy, Monica gets off the hook.  Well, that's not true, but
she's not in nearly the trouble I'm in.  And you know what?  I'm happy to
take the ass-end of the punishment stick for her.  If I had a choice, I'd
have happily said "I'll take her grounding too." That's love, right?  But
I'd like to have had the choice.  But having them assume it's all my fault
and I'm the bad guy just because I'm older?  Give me a break!

   You know what I don't get?  I don't get why they're so uptight about
this.  I mean, I know they have sex, and I know they've been to a couple of
swinger's parties (Trina's parents told me that little secret).  And both
Monnie and I have seen Dad checking her out when she's prancing around in
her underwear or her swimming suit.  So he wants to fuck her, she wants to
fuck him, what the hell is his problem?

   OK, I know the problem, it's probably mom.  Mom wouldn't let him.  I
don't want to blame this all on her, that's just how she was raised.  And
so was he.  But at least he seems to know that Monica is hot.  I don't see
Mom checking out my package.  What the fuck is up with that?  I'm not good
enough for her or something?  She always called me "handsome" and "cute"
and lately she's mentioned like how broad my shoulders are and how being on
the swim team really has improved my musculature.  And you know what? 
That's the exact same thing Alex's mom says to me, and Alex's mom loves to
fuck me and doesn't mind letting me know how hot she thinks I am.  I don't
want to sound stuck up or vain or anything, but it's good to hear it, you
know?  Everyone likes a compliment, don't they?  So it kind of bothers me
that Mom either doesn't think her son is hot or refuses to let him know. 
Julie's uncles and Mr.  and Mrs.  Dawson and Robyn's mom all have told me
that they all think I'm fuck-material and that my mom probably thinks so
to.

   And it's not like she has to tell me out loud or anything, if she'd just
take a nice long look at my ass the way Dad does with Monnie, we'd know. 
Is that so freakin' hard?

   So, great, now just because Monica and I were fooling around -- which
lots of families do, as it turns out -- we're both grounded.  Monica is
grounded for a month, and I'm grounded for 4 months!  And no computer
except for schoolwork, no internet except for schoolwork and only if Mom or
Dad are watching, no TV while I'm grounded, Dad isn't going to teach me to
drive so my learner's permit is wasted, I can't go skiing in Lake Tahoe
next December and...  what else...  oh yeah?  NO FUCKING MY SISTER!

   Oh, and mom went through my room and found my porn stash and threw them
all away!  Magazines, DVDs, some pictures from the internet.  Thank God
Robyn's dad didn't let me keep those pictures he took of Monnie and I
having sex with his whole family, or they'd be totally fucked, and not in
the good way.  Anyhow, Monica told me that Mom didn't even think to look
for porn in her room, so apparently I've still got some of my stash
underneath her mattress.  The DVDs are all gone (Monica doesn't have a DVD
player in her room, though, you know, neither do I anymore), but there's
still a couple of Hustler's and this she-male magazine which we both think
is really fucking hot.  Oh, plus a bunch of pictures we printed from the
internet.

   Obviously not being allowed onto the internet anymore means that's the
last of the internet pics for a while.  I'm pretty lucky, Julie's uncle
Larry taught us all bout clearing the history and the cache and cookies and
how to do secure deletes and proxies and stuff, so when Dad examined my
laptop after taking it away, there wasn't anything on it that was gonna get
me into more trouble.  And even more lucky, Larry made it really clear how
important it is not to ever print out any illegal pictures, so Mom thinks
the worst thing I had was some gay bareback pics in my porn stash, and has
no idea about the incest pics and little kid pics I'd been beating off to a
few days before.  I kept wanting to print those out, but everytime I was
tempted to, I remembered Larry telling me (while fucking me in the ass)
about his friends Judy and Alma getting busted by a nosy cleaning lady who
turned them in for a $25,000 reward.  But the thing is, why should I get in
trouble for looking at kids my age having sex?  I don't go for the rape
stuff or anything mean or anything, but the kid pics or kid/adult pics are
really the hottest stuff out there.

   So, yeah, Mom and Dad suck.  But I feel like an asshole, because they're
good parents and I love them and hate disappointing them.  And I can
totally tell I have.  When mom talks to me now, she has a real hard time
not yelling at me, even if it's telling me about how Aunt Carol is getting
married in January.  But it's worse with Dad.  I don't think he's even said
ten words to either of us since he got through yelling that first night. 
And Monica says that he doesn't look at her like he used to, and when she
tries to show off her body to him, he leaves the room.  Sometimes he says
"I gotta pee" if Mom's there, but if not, he just gets up and leaves. 
Monica is really sad about that.  At recess the other day, she almost
started crying about it.

   Thank God for recess, though.  We go to a private school that teaches
first through twelfth grade, so we can talk during recess and lunch.  At
home, we don't have any private time together.  Even at night, when I go to
the bathroom, I hear Mom or Dad crack open their door and make sure I'm not
making some midnight visit to Monica.  Which totally sucks, because
brothers and sisters should talk and we were always close even before we
started fucking.  I really miss her.  I know what you're thinking, but I
actually miss her, not just her pussy.  I do miss her pussy, of course, but
I miss talking to her and watching TV with her and watching her play soccer
and shit like that.  So, yeah, thank God for recess.  But now Mom is
threatening to take me out and send me to the public school.  She doesn't
want to because this school sends lots of students to lots of good
colleges, but she keeps threatening it.  That would suck, but I have a
couple of friends at the public high school, and I'm told that some other
families "in the lifestyle" (which means families that don't suck like
mine) have kids there too, so I'd have friends.  But even then, you know,
you make your best friends after school, not during it, and since I'd have
to come right home, I wouldn't get to know them as well as I could.

   Luckily, our friends (the ones who are in the lifestyle) know about us
getting caught from the few friends we've told.  Apparently word spread
pretty fast.  Usually kids aren't allowed into the lifestyle without their
parent's consent for security reasons, but Monica and I sorta got lucky. 
The upside is all the other parents feel very protective of us, like we're
little orphan children in their world or something.  So, like every other
day, one of my lifestyle friends comes up to me and says like "My parents
wanted me to tell you they're really sorry you two got caught and said
don't worry, things will get back to normal" or "Listen, when you get out
of jail, my parents are gonna throw a big party for you and you can fuck
all my sisters" or my favorite:

   "Hey, remember the Herzogs?  Well I was eating out Mrs.  Herzog last
night and she told me to tell you that she's saving Regina's ass for you
because you're a mortar."

   "I'm a what?  I'm a 'mortar'?"

   "Oh, no, uh...  a martyr, she said you're a 'martyr'.  Sorry, I'm still
a little stoned.  Can't wait till Monica is back in action."

   Regina is a nine-year-old little cutie-pie.  A couple of months ago,
Mrs. Herzog and Regina sucked my dick and I got to fuck Regina's tight
little pussy.  Twice.  She was the youngest I've ever been with and the
entire next week I was floating on air.  It's exactly the sort of thing I'd
like to be able to tell my parents about.  Getting to pop her ass-cherry is
totally awesome, but honestly I'm worried I'm gonna hurt her since it's her
first time.

   I'll still do it, don't get me wrong.

   Monica got a lot of that too.  Julie's four uncles even had Julie give
her a little bag of pot, but I made her give it to me and threw it away. 
If you think we're in trouble now, that's nothing compared to what would
happen if Monnie got caught getting high, and besides, she's only eleven, I
really don't like the idea of her getting stoned if I'm not around to watch
over her, and even then I could do without it.  I swear, Julie's uncles are
really cool, I dig them, but sometimes they could act just a bit more like
grown-ups.  I mean, take Julie for example, she's like the smartest girl in
her class, but her grades are just high enough to keep from getting
expelled.  She aces all her tests without studying, which is cool but her
homework is totally half-assed and that's when it gets done at all.  She's
really hot, though.  And a great kisser.  And she smells great.  Monica
says I have a crush on her, but that's retarded.  I just like fucking her
and talking to her and thinking about her when I'm not fucking or talking
to her.  Crushes are for girls.

   I wonder if I'll still be grounded by prom?

   Oh, but there is a funny part to this.  Mom kept saying we should have
Rev.  Johnson come talk to us about our "issue".  Dad doesn't want to
because he doesn't want us to tell anyone about it.  I bet he's afraid
people will think he's molesting us.  But mom is pretty insistent on this,
says I need spiritual guidance because I've obviously lost my way, and
Monnie needs counseling on the importance of her "virtue" or something. 
And her solution is Rev.  Johnson, which would be funny enough because we
go to church three times a year: Christmas, Easter and when the neighors
have their annual drunken yard sale.

   But it's even funnier since Rev.  Johnson is totally in the lifestyle. I
sucked his cock once to get it ready to fuck Monica.  He was the third guy,
and the first grown-up, to fuck her.  Before he fucked her (while I was
sucking his cock), he knelt down between her legs and said a prayer that
was like "Dear Lord, please bless this sacred union of loving flesh and
loving spirit, and help us to feel your presence in our time of ecastasy,"
and yadda, yadda.  Then when he was fucking her he was all "the Lord is
blessing us, Monica" and stuff like that.  I don't know, you might think
that's pretty fucked up, but I thought it was really hot.

   Apparently, "Johnson" isn't his real name.  Apparently, a long time ago,
a mom in a church he used to minister at was letting him fuck her
ten-year-old daughter.  That was all cool until the mom got caught by her
mother-in-law sending videos of the girl tied up and getting eaten out by a
poodle and the pool boy to an Italian soccer player they both had a crush
on.  She tried to threaten Rev.  Johnson that if he didn't pay to send her
and her daughter to Italy, she'd expose him and tell all about all the kids
he fucked.  Luckily the community rose up in support (especially the
parents of the kids he was fucking, who all wanted to protect him) and she
ended up looking like a crazy woman.  She got sent to jail, the girl is now
a famous porn star and Julie's uncle managed to find copies of the tapes
she made, which are actually pretty crappy compared to good kiddy porn. 
But nonetheless, Rev.  Johnson (or whatever he was called back then) didn't
want any more suspiscion on him and the families he was close with, so he
waited a couple months, packed his wife and three kids up, and headed out
here, changed his name and set up shop in one of the more active lifestyle
communities in the state, where he's been blessing the kids for the last
fifteen years.

   Don't get me wrong, he takes his God stuff seriously.  He got pretty
offended when I joked about baptizing Monica when he came on her face.  He
just has an open mind about sex.  With kids.  And Brazilian shemales.

   He said when I turn 18, he'll take me to "The Pump House", our local
baths.  That should be fun, but they don't let chicks in.  Still, sucking
off a reverend in a steam room while a total stranger fucks my ass is
really fuckin' wild, so I'll give it a go at least once.  That is, if I'm
not still grounded.

   So, yeah, if Mom sends us to him to get straightened out, we'll only end
up kinkier.  But I'm all for it because first of all, it might be the only
chance I get soon to get any sex at all, and second of all, maybe it'll
convince her to let up on the punishment.

   If nothing else, it'll just be nice to have someone I can talk to for
real.  It's like before I got in the lifestyle, when I was this horny
12-year-old boy.  I started jerking off when I was ten, and even back then,
my fantasies were all perverted.  When I beat off, I'd think about women
and men, girls from my school, my friends, even younger girls and boys,
pissing, ass-licking, anything I could think of.  And I remember when I was
younger, my mom warned me about people who would try to touch me in "bad
places" and take naughty pictures of me.  She warned me about child
molestors, but I secretly thought it sounded cool and decided that if
someone wanted to molest me, I'd let them.  No one ever did, but it was
what I fantasized about the most when I started jerking off.

   But I felt horrible about it.  I "knew" jerking off must be bad, and I
"knew" it was wrong to fantasize about kids or grown-ups or boys.  But I
couldn't help myself.  And then I started fantasizing about my family,
licking my little sister's pussy, fucking my mom, sucking my dad's cock. 
Or dad pulling my pants down at the mall and spanking my bare ass and then
making me lay down on the tables in the food court while he jerked off on
my face so that everyone could see how bad I was.

   I mean, seriously, when you're an eleven year-old kid fantasizing about
this stuff, it gets to you if you don't have someone to talk to about it. I
really thought I was a bad boy.  I mean, seriously, I thought God would
send me to hell or that Grandma was looking down from heaven and crying
about what a pervert I was.

   But I couldn't stop myself.  I loved jerking off, I loved the sick
fantasies I had, I loved seeing my sister in her panties, I loved it when
Mom would wear that tight red dress when she and dad were going out for a
night together, especially since I couldn't see a panty line so I assumed
she must be naked under there (actually it was probably a thong).  And I
loved the way Dad would bounce Monnie on his knee and he'd get a hard on
and have to hide it from Mom.  Once he even got a hard on while he and I
were playing in the pool.

   And so I was thinking I was a freak, a pervert, a sinner, and scared
that everyone who thought I was a good little boy would one day be able to
read my mind and find out how horrible I was.  I mean, I was really freaked
out.
   That all began to change when the summer between fifth and sixth grade.