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 Blank Check

   Chapter One

   It was just another Monday morning.

   I was working through the weekend's worth of e-mails, memo's and site
reports, as usual, and listening to the same complaints I have heard week
after week from Shelly and Tanya, two of my co-workers.  Work, nothing new
there, I like my job, to a point, but it's not that hard and it pays well
enough so I put up with it.  The environment is good, for the most part and
most of my co-workers get along and are nice enough.  And a few, are very
nice to look at.  As in Shelly and Tanya.

   But as the weeks passed I was finding it harder to let the Monday
morning bitch session slide.  It never seemed to vary.  Either Shelly or
Tanya would start with a description of how disappointed they'd been with
her date on Friday night, followed by the other's tale of woe.  It almost
always began with them picking up "this really good looking guy" and ending
with that same guy either being a total jerk or so bad in bed that the
girls wondered how the guy ever got a second date.

   Then Tanya said something that changed everything.

   I'd been engrossed in what I was doing, just letting the girls pratle
slide past me, trying to ignore it, and hadn't seen her as she had entered
my cubicle.

   "Brian, why are all the good looking guys such jerks and you nice guys
so uninteresting?"

   I sat back in my chair and just looked at her.  It took a moment but she
suddenly covered her mouth with her hands as her face turned a very bright
scarlet.  She stammered some incoherent words and fled.  Shelly had been
right behind Tanya and her face was almost as red as Tanya's had been.

   "Shelly," I said, "the answer is the same for both parts of that
question.  If all you see is what's on the surface you won't ever know who
a person is.  And you'll always be surprised when you do find out what's
real."

   With that said I turned back to my work, making it quite plain that I
had nothing more to say to her.  I could feel her presence as she
hesitated, then left.  As I settled back into the work I couldn't help but
wonder what either of them would think if they had any clue as to what
"this" nice guy had hidden under the nice guy mask.  It made me chuckle.

   There was a bit more tension in the office that day than normal.  Shelly
and Tanya were "not" themselves and it showed.  Several of my co-workers
had heard the exchange and most of them had told me that I'd handled it
quite well.  Personally, I didn't really care, but it was nice to know I
wasn't being seen as a jerk.  A few of the other women even told me that
they had been hoping someone would shut those two up a long time ago.

   It was just after lunch when our boss stopped in my cubicle.

   "Brian, what happened this morning?"

   I looked up at her and shrugged my shoulders.  "More than anything,
Beth, I think it was just a case of foot-in-mouth disease."

   "Well, from what I heard, not on your part."

   I shrugged my shoulders again.  "A question was asked, I answered."

   Beth chuckled and left.

   The rest of the day was mostly uneventful.  I did see several of the
women in the office talking but that wasn't unusual.  What was unusual was
the topic, me.  I'd been there long enough that the "new guy" stigma had
worn off, but I still wasn't "known" by most of the people I worked with.
It was a fairly big office with around sixty of us on this floor.

   There were a few times where I heard conversations being cut off
suddenly as I went one place or another.  I just shrugged it off, what else
could I do?

   Finally the day was over and I headed home.

   ************

   The next morning when I came in I found a vase of flowers on my desk.

   There wasn't a note so I just put them where they'd be out of the way
and got to work.  The tension of the day before had faded and the morning
passed far more quickly.  Even Shelly and Tanya were back to their chatty
selves, mostly...  their normal subject of male bashing was missing.

   As I was tidying up before lunch I turned to find Shelly and Tanya
standing at the entrance of my cubicle again.  Tanya was blushing but
Shelly seemed calm.

   It was Shelly that spoke.

   "Brian, would it be ok if we bought you lunch today?"

   "You don't have to, you know."

   "We know, we just think we should, after yesterday and all..." Tanya
nodded her head.

   "Ok, so where are we headed?"

   "Your choice," Tanya said.

   "Chinese it is then," I said as I grabbed my coat.

   My favorite place was just a block away and the girls followed as I led
the way.  Once we were ensconced in a booth I finally asked the question
that had been on my mind.

   "Do either of you even know what you want when you're out looking for a
guy?"

   They looked at each other and shrugged.  I couldn't help it, I laughed.

   Shelly's face darkened.  "What's so funny about that," she spat.

   I choked off the impulse to laugh again, "Shelly, if you can't even say
what you want, how are you ever going to know if you've found it?"

   "But..."

   "Oh, but nothing.  I know what I want."

   "Yeah, what is it then?" There was derision in her voice as she spoke.

   I looked Shelly right in the eyes.  "I want a woman who isn't afraid of
herself, who isn't afraid to explore her own desires, that will be willing
to explore mine, that will give me her trust and allow me to trust her, one
who isn't afraid to learn, who enjoys an evening of discussion as easily as
an evening of passion, and thinks there isn't any real difference between
them...  I want a woman who can match me, mind to mind, heart to heart and
passion to passion...  Is that too much to ask?"

   It was obvious my words had shocked both of them speechless.  In a way I
found it just as funny as the earlier moment, these women who could spout
all day long about how the men they knew didn't measure up, but when it
mattered couldn't find words to answer an honest question.

   I switched my focus to Tanya.  "And that's why I will find the woman I
want, because I won't settle for less."

   I stood up.

   "Forget lunch, apology accepted, I'll see you back at the office." Then
I walked out the door.

   Back on the street I hit a deli for a sandwich and went back to my desk.


   As the afternoon wore on some rush items found their way to my desk and
I forgot about the time.  When I did look up it was after six and the
office was empty.  I finished the rush jobs then got them sent off, glad
another day was over.  I did wonder a bit about Shelly and Tanya, but only
because I wondered if they would ever understand what I'd been trying to
tell them.  I doubted it, but you never knew.  But after today they had
become almost non-entities in my view.  Callous of me?  Yeah, but what the
heck, it wasn't as if their attitude was any better and I'd had enough, of
them and the attitude.

   *********

   The next morning it was obvious that the word was out that I'd dumped
the "bitch twins" at lunch the day before.  I wasn't entirely sure I liked
the attention it brought me.  It was nice, in it's own way, but life in an
office like that is easiest when you lay low and just do your job.

   Thankfully it didn't last long, it was just a day later that one of the
girls announced that she was pregnant and when you work in an office where
99% of the people you work with are women...  well, you get the picture.

   The next few weeks went by mostly as usual, with a few exceptions.  I
seemed to get asked to share lunch more often, mostly by some of the more
flirty women in the office, but a couple times by my boss, Beth.  With my
boss we mostly talked about work, she asked me what I thought of some of
the policies the company had and how I was doing with a new program that
they'd recently started using.  Once she'd asked about some of my other
co-workers and I told her I wasn't really comfortable with answering those
but that I'd be as honest as I thought I could be.  From what I saw I think
she was more interested in how I had responded than what her questions had
been about.  With the other women it mostly seemed to be them wondering if
I was real or something.  I got asked a lot of questions and was told by
most of them that I'd really done well in how I'd handled the "bitch
twins." A few of them tried to hint that they might be interested in seeing
me, after work, but none of them ever seemed to be willing to more than
just hint.  I'd given up on that kind of coy, girly game a very long time
ago.  After most of those lunch "dates" I think they were left more
confused than before.

   In the meantime both Shelly and Tanya had managed to get themselves
transferred to an office in another state and, from the little bit of
gossip I heard, not willingly, or together.  It did make life in our office
more pleasant, so why complain, right?

   After that the office settled down into a much more comfortable routine,
The girls had their cliques and all, but there wasn't any hostility
involved, just different groups that had common interests.  Late summer
passed into fall and the summer interns all went back to college and the
new hires started coming in, a few at a time.  For some of us that meant
longer hours while we trained new faces and sorted out who would last. 
That's when I found out that Beth, my boss had made me one of the trainers.

   I was assigned three new kids fresh out of college and was working on
seeing if they'd work out as data analysts.

   Suddenly, six weeks later the girl who'd announced that she was pregnant
last July had a miscarriage and I had six, instead of three trainees.  I
barely knew the new ones by name and soon found that my days were much
busier.

   Just before lunch the Friday before Thanksgiving I was dropping off some
reports to one of those junior analysts when she looked up at me and asked
if I wanted company for lunch.  Danielle had been at our office for about
three months by then after graduating last spring from a respected college
nearby.  She was also one of those new ones under me that I was still
trying to understand.  I figured she wanted to talk about some concerning
work, it wasn't unusual, and actually, if she was taking the initiative
here I was glad.  You didn't get ahead in this work if you weren't willing
to make your mind up and get things done.

   I looked down at her and replied, "sure, do you have anything in mind?"

   She took a moment to decide.  "How about Ray's Deli?"

   "That sounds good to me, I'll meet you at the elevators at 11:30." I
gave her a smile to which she nodded and I went back to work.  Twenty
minutes later as I walked to the elevators I saw her waiting for me.  It
surprised me, I knew she was a small woman, but I'd never seen her standing
before, she couldn't be more than 5' 0", maybe less.  She smiled at me as I
walked up to her but I could see her hands clutching her purse and there
was a slight waver to her stance, almost as if she had sea legs, not quite
sure if the world was standing still or not.

   I looked into her bright green eyes and saw them start to fall away. 
"Danielle, thanks, it's nice to have company sometimes.  Shall we, go?" and
pushed the call button and when the doors opened right up I touched her
elbow and led her in.  As we rode down I let my hand drop from her elbow.

   As we left the building and started towards the deli I slowed my pace to
hers.  She looked up at me a couple of times and I could see her face was a
little flushed so I started talking about the report I'd just handed her
earlier and my general take on the basic data in it.  That seemed to relax
her.  When we got to the deli we were quiet as we waited to place our
orders and while she still seemed a little nervous but not like she'd been
when I got to the elevator.

   After we got our orders I chose a booth in the front, by the windows. 
She took her sweater off revealing a nice silky, pale blue blouse, her
skirt was a medium grey and came down to mid calf.

   As we ate she kept stealing glances at me, each time I noticed, her eyes
would drop to the table.  She wasn't hiding it from me, that was obvious,
but it seemed like she wasn't sure what to do next.

   As I was wrapping up the leavings from my sandwich she finally spoke.

   "Brian, I've heard some to the gossip about what happened between you
and those two women and every time I do no one seems to know what you said
to them that made them shut up.  It's always "I heard he said..." then
there's about twenty or so variations.  I was wondering, what did you say
to them."

   Danielle hadn't been here when the incident happened between the "bitch
twins" and I, but I'd gotten used to being some kind of minor deity in some
of the women's eyes.  I was a loner as far as they could see, I didn't act
gay, but I never "hit" on any of them.

   "Danielle, I asked them if, when they went out looking for guys, if they
knew what they were looking for in a man."

   "Did they?"

   "Nope, they didn't have a clue.  Then I told them that I knew exactly
what "I" wanted.  Of course they didn't believe me, so I told them what I'm
looking for and they still couldn't grasp the concept of how knowing what
you wanted could make a difference, so I left."

   "What do you want?"

   I reached across the table and lifted her face so I was looking straight
in her eyes.  "Are you sure you want to know?"

   Her head nodded in my hand.

   "I want a woman who isn't afraid of herself, who isn't afraid to explore
her own desires, that will be willing to explore mine, that will give me
her trust and allow me to trust her, one who isn't afraid to learn, who
enjoys an evening of discussion as easily as an evening of passion, and
thinks there isn't any real difference between them...  I want a woman who
can match me, mind to mind, heart to heart and passion to passion."

   I let my hand fall away from her face and waited.  I had no idea how she
would respond but she kept looking in my eyes.  After a few minutes like
that I could see her make a decision as her head nodded once.

   "I saw you, last weekend."

   "Uh-huh?"

   "uh...  at the Rope Walk."

   "And what did you see?" The Rope Walk was a very exclusive, very private
club.  The fact that she even knew of it surprised me.

   "You were on that stage, with those two women, and all those ropes..."

   "Yes, I was.  But I'm wondering how you came to be there."

   "My friend, well, her boyfriend, she says he does these things, with
rope and paddles and stuff...  and he said there was this place he could
take us, so we could, you know, see what it was like and so he took us, me,
Gail and Steph and we saw and all..."

   "Ah, well Vince made a mistake he's going to regret," Her eyes widened
when I correctly named her host last weekend.  "Vince was only a
provisional member and he was only allowed to bring one guest at a time,
I'm sure that by now he's been informed that his membership has been
revoked."

   "But..."

   "Danielle, we make sure all new members know our rules, "he" knew them,
but chose to ignore them.  We do NOT allow that, ever.  But we also never
make a scene about it, most likely he got a call Monday and was told."

   "So...  I won't be able to go back..." Her eyes fell away and she
started to lower her face again.

   "Not as his guest at least..." Her eyes shot back up to mine, her lips
broadening into a smile.  "But are you sure you want to..."

   "Yes..." Her voice was just a bare whisper, her face was flushing with
color and I could see little beads of sweat forming on her neck.

   "Give me your bra."

   She hesitated only a heartbeat then quickly glanced around before
unbuttoning her blouse.  She made no attempt to hide what she was doing but
wasn't being flagrant about it either.  her pale, smooth skin was revealed
a bit at a time as the sides of her blouse moved and then she reached
behind her back and undid the clasp giving me a good view of her lacy bra,
the same pale blue as her blouse.  Her hands pushed each bra strap down her
arms then she pulled them through the sleeves and the rest of the way off.
She paused only a moment and then opened her blouse again.  Her bra hung
loosely over her small breasts.

   "Take it, please, please, it's yours..." Her eyes didn't move from mine
as I reached across our table and lifted the bra away from her skin.  Her
pale pink nipples were as hard as any I had ever seen, her breath was slow,
measured, it was obvious that she was working very hard to keep control. 
As I pulled the bra away I let one finger trail across her right nipple and
was rewarded with a small gasp in response.  I slipped the bra down onto
the seat next to me.  She still hadn't moved to close her blouse and I took
the time to gaze at her.  Her breasts were probably a "B" cup, firm and
pale, and very inviting.  I could see the pale red and blue lines of her
veins just under the surface.

   "Button back up now."

   She nodded once, then slowly put her blouse back in order, the
protrusions of her nipples making the thin fabric tent.

   "Danielle, this is important, do you know what you want?"

   "Yes...  but not really, there's so much I don't know, but I want to...
I do..." She was squirming in her seat a bit, rocking slightly, side to
side.

   I reached across again and touched the tip of her nose.  "What do you
want to learn?"

   Her chin rose as she opened her lips and took my finger in her mouth.  I
felt her tounge exploring the surface on my skin as she tried to wrap
around it.  She sucked on it gently for a moment then released me.

   "Everything..." she whispered.

   I pulled back and took a pad out of my coat pocket, pulled the top sheet
and replaced it, then got out a pen and wrote down a url and pushed the
sheet towards her.

   "Start here Danielle." Then before giving it to her I added my cell
number.  "Call me tomorrow and we'll talk, OK?"

   "I will." Her voice was firm, low and a little throaty.

   I stood and slipped her bra in my coat pocket then picked up her sweater
and held it out for her to slip into.  She purposely brushed her arms
against me as she did.  Once it was on her I started buttoning it for her
as I stood behind her.  We were facing the windows and I felt her breathing
get rough as my hands and arms brushed against her.  After I finished the
last button I slipped one hand under her blouse and reached for her breast,
giving it a gentle squeeze.

   She gasped and I looked up.  Outside, staring in, were a boy and a girl,
probably around ten to twelve.  I smiled at them then put my other arm
around and started lifting the front of Daniels blouse and sweater.  She
pressed herself hard against me but didn't move to stop me.  Just as I
started feeling the soft swell of her breasts under my hands I stopped.

   "Do it..." she moaned.

   So I did.

   We stood there about thirty seconds then I lowered my hands letting her
clothing fall back into place, the kids were still watching.  I took
Danielle's hand and started for the door and the kids took off in a sudden
hurry.

   Once outside I let her hand go and we walked back to work.  In the
elevator riding back up to our floor I suggested that she might want wear
her sweater the rest of the day and she blushed again.

   We separated without speaking as we got off and headed to our desks.

   About twenty minutes later she tapped my shoulder and without a word
placed small, pale blue bundle of cloth in my hand, then rushed off.  The
aroma was unmistakable, so I tucked them in my lower drawer where a
matching item was already.

   I spent the next couple of hours working through some reports then, when
I saw Beth come back from one of her meetings I asked her if we could
speak. She agreed and we headed to her office.  When I indicated that I
wanted to close the door she gave me a nod and I did.

   "So, Brian, what's on your mind."

   "I know it's a little early for the reports on the new hires but I've
got a couple that are starting move ahead of the rest, enough so that I
think if we wait we might be risking stifling them."

   "How do you mean?"

   "One of them is showing signs of being able to begin putting things in
context, you know, taking all that seeming irrelevant clutter some data
dumps throw at us, and finding the useful info.  I think he's going to be
good, And I think it would be a shame to hold him back."

   "Ah, Mr.  Sheldon," I knew Beth had been following Jeremy since he was
the "Only" male in the last group of new hires.

   "The other one is Danielle Richards, I think she's developing a very
keen sense of detail and she's always had that ability to connect with
people.  I think she's be a very good choice for that new track Marlon
Peters wants to start up the first of the year."

   "I've noticed her too, Brian, but I don't know, she's always seemed just
a little too timid."

   "A week ago I would have agreed with you, but I've noticed some changes,
good ones, recently and while it might be early, I think she's ready."

   "You know Marlon is going to want to do his own evaluation."

   "Of course, that's why I am bringing it up now.  If we get that started
in the next week or so he'll have time to do his eval and still get her in
with the first track in January."

   "All right, I'll run it by Marlon and..."

   Later, after the meeting with Beth, I felt better.  Danielle would be
moving to another department and out from under "my" supervision.  I wasn't
at all sure where things were heading, but it didn't hurt to cover the
bases as early as possible.  Plus, I'd just managed to cut down my workload
by a significant percentage, which would free up more of my own time.

   The rest of the day flew by but I wasn't in any hurry to get out either.
Once the office was mostly empty I collected my day's souvenirs and made my
way to the elevators and headed home.