Note: This story was dynamically reformatted for online reading convenience.
 
 Title: Sleeping with Ellie


Summary: Siblings have to deal with their feelings, and their family. 


Keywords:inc,fic,erotic,young,sex







   I'd only been in bed for a few minutes when there was a knock on my
door. It was a little unusual for anyone in my family to disturb me so late
at night, but I didn't really mind.  If one of them needed something, I
preferred they get it now rather than wait until I was asleep.

   "Come in," I called.

   The door opened to reveal Ellie, the oldest of my three younger sisters.
She was wearing a t-shirt and pyjama pants, indicating that she was heading
to bed soon too.

   "Hey, Neil," she said.  "Sorry, I know you're trying to sleep and
everything."

   "Nah, don't worry about it.  I only just got into bed.  Do you need
something?"

   "Sort of.  Maybe.  I just...  I started getting a little panicky about a
couple of my classes is all."

   Ellie took a step into the room.  I leaned over and switched on my
reading lamp.  The extra light made it easier to pick out the signs of
worry on her face.

   "Come sit," I said, gesturing to the side of my bed.

   I sat up as Ellie closed the door and made her way over to me.  She took
a seat toward the foot of the bed and pulled her knees up to her chest. 
She didn't look overly upset, so whatever was bugging her probably wasn't
too big a deal.  Then again, the women in the house were pretty talented at
hiding things from me.  Sometimes it was tricky being the only male around.

   "I wasn't really sure who to talk to," she said.  "But I thought we're
more or less in the same situation and everything, so maybe...."

   "You mean 'cause we're both going to university and I've already taken
some of the classes you're in?" I leaned closer.  "Are you gonna ask me to
help you cheat?"

   "What?  No!  You goof.  I just wanted to talk, not get us both kicked
out."

   "We'd only get in trouble if you get caught.  And you'd probably be the
only one getting kicked out, unless you ratted on me."

   Ellie tried to fight back a smile, but was slowly losing the battle.

   "I don't need to cheat, okay?"

   "Okay.  Just making sure.  What did you actually want to talk about?"

   "I don't know.  Just...  stuff.  Like, do you ever feel like it's only a
matter of time before you fuck up royally?"

   "Always."

   "I'm serious!" she said, her continued smile betraying her attempt to
chastise me.  "I just finished a paper and I can't help feeling like it's
no good.  And that's stupid, because I know it's not that bad, but...." She
shrugged helplessly.  "Plus I have a test tomorrow too.  And I have to keep
my grades high enough to maintain my scholarship.  And--"

   "Whoa, Ellie, come on.  You know you'll do fine.  You're the smart one
in the family, remember?  I have yet to see you get a less-than-acceptable
mark on anything."

   "I know.  It's stupid to worry about it, isn't it?"

   I shook my head.  "It's not stupid.  It's unnecessary and
counter-productive, but not stupid.  Everybody worries."

   Ellie nodded, then crawled over to sit beside me.  I scooted to the side
a bit so we had room to sit next to each other and lean back against the
headboard of the bed.

   "I was pretty sure I was just panicking over nothing anyway," she said.
"It happens sometimes.  I think it's worse 'cause there's been more stuff
going on with my classes than normal recently."

   "Yeah, you might just be a little overwhelmed.  It'll calm down again
soon.  Most professors really aren't trying to make your life difficult. 
Although I did have one last year who was kind of an asshole...."

   "Uh huh.  I guess I should just remember that if you haven't failed any
classes yet, I'm in no real danger."

   "Hey!"

   I aimed a punch at her shoulder that was light enough to be little more
than a tap.  She giggled and pretended to be knocked over by the blow
before sitting back up.

   "Sorry," she said.  "You know I'm just kidding."

   "Enh, it's not like you're wrong.  Besides, you've been getting the best
grades so long that all the pressure's on you to make Mom proud.  She
didn't even ask me what my marks were for last semester."

   "Oh god, like I need to be reminded of her expectations right now,"
Ellie said while rolling her eyes.  "I mean, that one time I failed a test
back in high school...  I still remember how disappointed she looked."

   "Sorry," I said, feeling it was my turn to apologize.  "Guess that
wasn't helpful."

   "Not so much.  It's okay though, I'm actually feeling a little calmer
now.  I think I really did just need to talk about it." Ellie climbed off
the bed and made her way to the door.  "See ya tomorrow, okay?"

   "Yeah, okay.  Night, Ellie."

   "G'night, Neil."

   ****

   Breakfast the next morning was, as usual, disorganized.  None of us ever
seemed to eat it at exactly the same time, except perhaps for Lily and
Alice.  They tended to be more in sync than any of the rest of us were.  It
probably had something to do with being twins.

   I was the last one to make it to the kitchen, just behind Ellie who was
in the process of pouring herself some coffee.  Mom was already on her way
out the door and only stopped for a moment when she saw me arrive.

   "Morning, Neil," she said.  "I already told the girls, but I left some
money and a list of groceries.  I don't care who deals with it, so long as
it gets done."

   "'Kay Mom," I said.  "Don't worry about it.  Have fun at work."

   I put all the sincerity in my words that Mom had every time she'd told
me to have fun at school.  She never found it nearly as amusing as I did
when I gave it right back to her.  To her credit, she didn't even roll her
eyes this time.

   "Alright, see you all tonight," she called as she headed out the door.
"Love you."

   There was a chorus of goodbyes from the kitchen, then back to
near-silence broken by the muted sounds of eating and sipping coffee. 
Ellie was still standing by the counter with her mug, while Lily and Alice
were at the table eating their bowls of cereal.

   I glanced at the clock, then back to my youngest sisters.  Getting them
out the door in time to catch their bus was a bit of a pain at times.  They
were eighteen and, to my mind, old enough to look after themselves, but
they did occasionally live up to their shared status of being the babies of
the family.

   "We're hurrying," Lily said, not even waiting for me to speak.  "You
don't need to crack the whip."

   "Did I say anything?" I asked.

   "You were gonna.  You had your serious face on."

   Alice just giggled and let her twin argue with me.  Ellie was no help
either.  She just stood there with her mug held in front of her face to
hide her smile.

   "Well, just as long as you understand you're not getting a drive if you
miss your bus," I said.  "You've used up your chances for this year. 
You'll just have to walk if it happens again."

   "Hey!  It's not like I can help it if the bus driver's a jerk," Lily
said.  "Sometimes he gets here early and doesn't wait."

   "Right.  I suppose there's no way that it's just you being slow and not
getting out there in time." I held up my hand to cut off her protests. 
"Anyway, point is, you better get on that bus."

   Lily rolled her eyes and stuck her tongue out at me.  I took a menacing
step toward her, making her hop out of her chair.  We held the stand-off
for a moment, then Ellie finally stepped in to help.  While I distracted
Lily, Ellie moved silently behind her and swatted her on the butt.  It
wasn't a hard blow, but it was enough to make Lily squeal and turn toward
her big sister with the look of a girl betrayed.

   "Your bus is gonna be here in, like, ten minutes," Ellie said, not
falling for Lily's puppy dog eyes any more than I was.  "Get your butt
moving."

   Lily knew she was outgunned at that point.  If Ellie or I hadn't been
there to back the other up, she could have dragged Alice into the argument
and outnumbered us.  As it was, the twins had never been a match for their
older siblings working as a team.

   "Come on, Allie," Lily said, grabbing Alice's arm.  "Let's go get
ready."

   Alice followed her sister to the room they shared without complaint. 
She was a lot more prone to doing as she was told than Lily was, or at
least appearing to.  I sometimes suspected that she was simply better at
picking her battles.

   ****

   Ellie and I drove to our university campus together, as we did most
days. Our schedules weren't different enough to cause too many problems
with a carpooling arrangement.  More importantly, our family only had two
cars and Mom rarely surrendered hers to any of her kids.  That tended to
leave us with few options.

   We headed home sometime in the early evening, after Ellie's last class
was finished.  I'd pulled the car around to wait for her nearby, so as soon
as she got in we were on our way.  Aside from her backpack, I noticed that
she also had another bag full of stuff that I didn't remember her bringing
with her that morning.

   "What's all that?" I asked as she shoved her bags into the back seat to
get them out of her way.

   "School stuff," she said.  "Duh."

   "I know.  I was just questioning why you seem to have twice as much of
it."

   Ellie rolled her eyes and sighed, though I got the impression that I
wasn't the one she was annoyed at.

   "I got a project thingy to do.  I'm supposed to use library resources
for research, or some bullshit like that.  I think it's supposed to teach
me something about not relying on the internet.  Mostly it just means more
books to carry."

   I couldn't help chuckling.

   "Let me guess.  Is the professor who assigned this, like, ancient?"

   "He looks like he pre-dates the pyramids, yeah.  Has to have a TA do
anything computer related for him.  Fun times all round, let me tell you."

   "I bet.  You're not gonna get all crazy and overwhelmed again with this
project, are you?  Should I expect you again tonight?"

   Ellie sighed again.  This time it was unquestionably directed at me.

   "Great," she said.  "I go to you with a problem one time, and now you'll
be teasing me about it forever.  This is the sort of thing that gives
people issues, you know."

   "Oh don't worry, I won't tease you forever.  Another eight or nine times
tops.  It'd just get boring after that."

   Ellie twisted in her seat and raised her arm to hit me, then thought
better of it since I was driving.  She reluctantly resumed facing the front
and crossed her arms over her chest.

   "I owe you a punch," she said.  "Don't think you're not gonna get one."

   "I'm kidding, El.  You know that."

   "I know you are.  Doesn't mean I am."

   I tried to look innocent, but it was tricky when I had to keep my eyes
on the road.  Not that she would have bought it even if I could have given
the attempt my full attention.

   We continued on without further incident until I made a turn off the
main road.  Ellie frowned when she noticed we were no longer headed for
home, then turned to me.

   "Where are we going?" she asked.

   "Grocery store," I said.  "Or did you forget?"

   "I actually did.  Probably because we didn't have any kind of argument
about it to make it stick in my mind.  Guess you volunteered me to help
you, huh?"

   "Well, look at it this way.  Either we both stop in on the way home, or
we go home first and drag Lily and Alice into a four-way fight about who
gets to make another trip to deal with it."

   "Ugh, fine.  It probably is easier this way," she conceded.  "You're not
going to be a pain, are you?"

   "Who, me?"

   I pulled into the grocery store parking lot and found an empty space. 
Ellie and I got out and made our way to the entrance of the building.  I
grabbed a cart on our way through and pulled out the list Mom had left that
morning.  It was snatched from my hand before I could even start reading
it.

   "Let's start with the fruits and vegetables," Ellie said as she scanned
the list.

   "Sure," I said.

   I wasn't about to make an issue of Ellie taking charge.  We'd done
groceries together enough times over the years that we'd settled into
roles; Ellie led the way with the list, and I followed with the cart. 
Occasionally I'd sneak something into the cart when she wasn't looking,
which was one of the ways I kept myself amused on these trips.  It was
always funny when she realized two or three aisles later that we had half a
dozen packages of cookies that needed to be put back.  I wasn't sure how
she put up with me sometimes.

   Minutes passed, and our cart slowly filled up.  I followed Ellie between
aisles, not yet bored enough to cause mischief.  Part of that was the pants
my sister was wearing.  Since I was behind her most of the time, I quickly
discovered just how good her butt looked in them when she walked or bent
over.  Admittedly, it was kind of a pervy thing to do and I felt slightly
guilty about it, but not guilty enough not to look.  I was too distracted
to realize that being so quiet would arouse my sister's suspicions that I
was up to something.

   "Are you staring at my ass?"

   I jerked out of my butt-induced trance and tried not to look
embarrassed. I'd been caught.

   "Yes," I said, knowing it wouldn't do much good to lie.

   Ellie opened her mouth, then closed it.  Apparently she didn't know how
respond to an open admission.  She took a step toward me and punched me
hard on the arm.

   "Ow!  Hey!" I protested, trying to keep my voice low enough that it
wouldn't attract attention from other shoppers.  "I don't think I deserved
that."

   "I still owed you one from before.  Now we're even for both things."

   She grabbed a couple cans off the shelf and lobbed them at me a little
harder than necessary.  I managed to catch both of them and set them safely
in the cart.

   "Well...  sorry," I said.  "But your ass looks really good in those
pants."

   I got half a smile out of her for the compliment.

   "Thanks," she said.  Then she sighed.  "How sad is it that the only
compliment I get all day is from my brother?"

   "How sad is it that the nicest butt I've seen all day is my sister's?" I
countered.

   She smiled even wider this time, but I could see she was trying to fight
it.

   "Cut it out," she said.  "Seriously.  I mean, I appreciate it...  sort
of...  but it's, you know, kind of weird."

   "No more compliments.  Got it."

   "That's not what I...  oh just shut up."

   We carried on through the store, with me now making an actual effort not
to check out my sister.  I was pretty sure she was keeping an eye on me,
but that could have been simple paranoia.  I couldn't really blame her if
she was.  Either way, I hoped she understood that it had just been a case
of my male instincts taking over.  It wasn't like I'd made a deliberate
decision to assess her body.

   "Did you ever think this what your life was gonna be?" Ellie asked.

   "Um...  it kind of depends on what you mean by that," I said.

   "Like, you know, still living at home, going shopping with your sister
instead of a girlfriend...  that sort of thing."

   I shrugged.  "Sounds about right.  We're still young, we've got time to
get to all that other stuff."

   "Yeah, but...  did you ever think maybe it would be different if Dad...
if he hadn't left?"

   "Ellie...."

   She was pretending to examine the grocery list intently, but she wasn't
fooling me.  Unfortunately, I wasn't sure where she was going with her line
of questioning, which made it hard to know what the best response was.

   "I mean, look at us," she said.  "We've started being responsible for
Lily and Alice, at least a little bit.  Mom hardly ever bothers parenting
you or me anymore.  I can't help feeling like we've grown up, but not quite
the way we're supposed to."

   "At least we did grow up.  I know plenty of people who haven't managed
that yet and probably never will."

   "I s'pose.  It could be a lot worse, couldn't it?"

   "It could totally be worse."

   "Mm-hm.  I mean, perving aside, you're not exactly the worst brother to
be stuck with."

   "Gee, thanks."

   Ellie laughed, and I felt a sense of relief that she wasn't going to
slip into a bad mood after all.  If she really wanted a serious discussion
about our issues in life, I'd much rather she wait until we had some
privacy.

   ****

   I took up temporary residence in the living room that evening.  I had
some reading to do for one of my classes and one of the chairs there was
ideal for that purpose, in my opinion.  It was both comfortable and
positioned such that I could get good light from a few different angles.

   The downside to not staying in my room was that I was subject to the
occasional interruption.  The first of the evening came from Lily.

   "Where'd you put the car key?" she demanded.  "I'm going over to a
friend's house for a bit."

   I arched an eyebrow and lowered my book slightly.

   "Must be awfully urgent for you to forget to be polite about it," I
said, deliberately choosing a tone of voice that would irritate her.

   Lily bit back her instinctive response.  If she had vocalized it, I was
certain it would have been even less polite than her previous attempt.  She
took a deep breath and mustered an obviously fake smile.

   "Can you please tell me where the key is?"

   "Probably on the counter by the fridge.  If not, ask Ellie."

   "You couldn't have just said that in the first place?" she asked,
instantly dropping her pretense of cheerfulness once she had her
information.  "It would have saved us both time."

   "Wouldn't have annoyed you nearly as much though."

   She rolled her eyes, but didn't push the issue any further.  She stalked
off toward the kitchen, nearly running into Alice coming the other way. 
The twins shared a glance, then moved past each other without a word.

   "Is she really going to a friend's house?" I asked Alice, who unlike her
sister didn't seem to be in a hurry to get anywhere.

   Alice made sure Lily was out of earshot, then slipped closer, taking up
a perch on the arm of the couch.

   "I think so," she said.  "But she didn't say much about it."

   "Oh well.  As long as she doesn't get into too much trouble."

   I went back to my reading, but Alice lingered.  I assumed she was
deciding whether or not to watch some Netflix, so I didn't pay much
attention.  However, it turned out there was something else on her mind.

   "Neil?" she said.

   "Yeah?"

   "Can I ask you something?"

   "I can't promise an answer until I know what the question is."

   "That's...." She shook her head.  "Anyway, I just...  I was wondering,
like, am I too boring?"

   I set my book down on my lap, leaving my finger between the pages to
mark my spot.

   "First off, no," I said.  "Secondly, why would you think that?"

   "Well, Lily's always doing more stuff than me.  She's more popular at
school too."

   "You don't think that maybe your sister is just more...." I waved my
free hand as I tried to think of an appropriate word.  "Aggressive? 
Out-going?  Some might say obnoxious?  Being a little quieter isn't a bad
thing.  You two don't have to be exactly the same just because you're
twins."

   Alice smiled, and even giggled when I referred to Lily as obnoxious.

   "I know," she said.  "I just worry sometimes that I'm, I don't know,
doing something wrong."

   "You and everyone else in the world.  I mean, look at me," I said,
holding up my book.  "I'm not exactly spending an evening full of
excitement."

   She nodded, and I was pretty sure it wasn't just to humour me.  At the
very least, she looked a little more confident than she had a couple of
minutes ago.

   Mom walked in shortly after that while Alice and I were still just kind
of hanging out.  She sat down on the couch and got comfortable.

   "What are you two up to?" Mom asked.

   Alice glanced at me, then back to Mom.

   "Nothing much," she said.

   Mom nodded.  "Well, I think I'm ready just to relax for the rest of the
evening.  Either of you interested in watching a movie or something?"

   "Sure," Alice said with a shrug.  "Which one?"

   "Doesn't matter.  Why don't you see if you can find something
interesting on Netflix.  You're good at picking out movies."

   Alice hopped off the arm of the couch where she'd been sitting and went
to pick out a movie.  In the meantime Mom turned her attention to me.  I'd
been trying to get through some more of my book while partly following
their conversation.

   "We aren't going to bother you, are we Neil?" Mom asked.

   "Hm?  Oh, no, that's fine," I said.  "I knew the risks of reading down
here.  I can go somewhere else if I get too distracted."

   "Okay.  I wouldn't want to get in the way of your schoolwork is all."

   "Nah.  I'm keeping up with it pretty well."

   No more was said about it, and soon Alice had a movie picked out.  She
and Mom settled in together on the couch to watch it while I kept reading.
My attention was grabbed by the TV every now and then, but the movie wasn't
anything I was particularly interested in.

   ****

   Ellie spent most of the evening in her room.  That wasn't indicative of
any real problem on its own, but given recent conversations with her I
wanted to be sure she was okay.  Admittedly, I also had some lingering
guilt from getting caught staring at her ass earlier that I wanted to make
up for.

   I decided to check on her just before going to bed.  There was a chance
she would already be asleep by then, but I didn't think she would be.  I
made sure to knock softly before entering, just in case.

   "Come in," Ellie called.

   I opened the door and took a half-step into her room.  She had
apparently been getting ready to go to bed when I interrupted her.  She was
wearing a pair of pyjama pants and a loose tank top.  I assumed she had
just finished changing since she scooped up her discarded clothes from
earlier and threw them into her laundry basket as I came in.

   "Hey," I said.  "I didn't know if you wanted to talk or anything."

   "You sure that's what you wanted?" she asked with a faint smile.  "You
should have stopped by a couple minutes ago, you could have watched me
change."

   "Are you really not gonna let that go?  I look at your butt one
time...."

   "Yeah, your little sister's butt.  Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't
think you're supposed to be looking at all.  And who knows how many times
you did it before you got caught."

   Ellie folded her arms across her chest and faced me with a steady gaze.
Only the smirk on her face gave away the fact that she was just teasing me.

   "I'll make you a deal," I said.  "You drop this, and I won't pick on you
about last night anymore."

   "Hm, I don't know," she said thoughtfully.  "I think you being a perv
has far more teasing potential than my little freak-out."

   "Aw, come on," I said while attempting to look repentant.  "I'm sorry,
it won't happen again, et cetera, et cetera."

   "You could at least try to sound sincere."

   "Yeah, I could.  On the other hand, I'm pretty sure you already know
whether or not you're gonna keep picking on me and nothing I say is going
to change your mind."

   "That's a rather poor attitude to take.  A little groveling might very
well help your case."

   I rolled my eyes and started to turn away.

   "This is so not worth it," I said.  "I'll see ya tomorrow."

   "Wait.  I...  I'll try not to go on about it too much, okay?"

   I paused and looked back.  As far as I could tell Ellie was making a
genuine offer, despite it being worded such that she wasn't really
committing to anything.

   "Yeah, okay," I said.  "Good night."

   "G'night, Neil."

   ****

   Ellie was the last one to get up the next morning.  Mom and the twins
had already left, and I was beginning to think I might need to check on her
to make sure she was awake when she finally stumbled into the kitchen.

   "Ugh," she said.  "Forgot to set my stupid alarm clock last night."

   "Yeah, that'll do it."

   "Don't suppose all classes have been canceled for today due to...  I
dunno, rampaging zombie dinosaurs or something?"

   "I haven't heard, but I suspect not."

   "Crap."

   Ellie filled a mug with the remaining contents of the coffee-maker.  She
slumped down into a chair by the table and sipped the now-lukewarm liquid.

   "You gonna make it?" I asked.

   "Yeah, I'll be fine.  It's just, you know, not a great start to the
day."

   "Indeed."

   I went about my business getting ready for the day, leaving my sister
alone in the kitchen.  We weren't in any great rush, even contending with
Ellie's late awakening.  That was one of the perks of the university years;
as long as we had a little bit of luck when signing up for our classes, we
had no need to get out of the house at an ungodly hour.  Ellie and I had
managed to hit a pretty good balance this year when it came to our
schedules.  We were able to coordinate our schedules for the most part, as
well as satisfy our desire for sleep.

   We eventually got ready and walked out to the car together.  Lily hadn't
'forgotten' to return the key to me, as she had once or twice before, so we
were all set.  I drove partly because I usually did, but also because I
wasn't sure if Ellie was even up for it.  She seemed happy to just stare
out the window at the passing scenery.

   "Neil?" she said.

   "Yeah?"

   "I know you didn't mean to stare at my butt.  I'm sorry for teasing you
about it."

   "Well...  thanks.  I think." I watched her in the corner of my eye,
trying to judge her mood.  "I'm not sure you've ever apologized for
something like that before.  It's actually a little worrying."

   Ellie smiled faintly.  "Yeah, well, you know."

   "I actually don't.  I mean, you know it didn't really bother me that
much, right?  No more so than lots of other things that you've never shown
any remorse over."

   "Maybe this is different."

   "In what way?"

   "Look, do you want me to call you a perv some more?  Would that make you
happy?"

   "No."

   "So maybe just drop it then.  Gift horses.  Mouths.  All that good
stuff."

   I took Ellie's advice and shut up.  I still didn't really understand
what had just happened, but it hadn't exactly been a bad thing. 
Apologizing was generally considered to be positive in society.  It was
just weird to have it come from a sibling who wasn't under any kind of
duress.

   ****

   Mom and Alice watched a movie together in the living room again that
evening.  I half-watched along with them, while also getting in a little
more class-related reading.  Mid-way through the movie Lily came in and
dragged Alice off to their room.  I wasn't sure what that was about, but
Lily must have had some idea because she went along without question.

   Lily was replaced about twenty minutes later by Ellie.  I wasn't paying
much attention at first, but I glanced over as she sat down on the couch
and thought I was seeing wrong.  Everything about her demeanour suggested
that she was casually watching the movie.  What confused me was the
realization that she wasn't wearing any pants.

   Mom noticed the same thing I had a couple minutes later.  Ellie had done
a great job of not drawing attention to herself.

   "Ellie!  What are you doing?" Mom demanded.

   "Well I was gonna watch the movie with you guys," Ellie said.  "But I
don't have to if it's a problem."

   "Go put some clothes on," Mom said, pointing toward the stairs.

   "What?  Oh, come on Mom.  I spilled my drink all over my jeans and threw
them in the wash.  I'm gonna be going to bed soon anyway."

   "Yes, and you can wear what you want when you do.  You can't just be
wandering around the house in your underwear."

   I was doing my best to stay quiet during the exchange.  Somehow I
managed to not let so much as an errant chuckle escape my lips.  I also
decided it was in my best interest not to point out that the girls
occasionally ate breakfast in little more than a shirt and panties.  It
wasn't exactly unheard of.  It was, however, rather unusual for any of them
to be so scantily clothed any time after first thing in the morning.

   "Fine," Ellie said after a brief stand-off of silent staring with Mom.
"I'll go put something else on.  Happy?"

   "Yes, I am," Mom said.  "Just because your brother is the only boy
around here doesn't mean you don't have to dress properly."

   I purposefully didn't look up after that statement.  I could feel
Ellie's smirk without looking, whether or not she showed it physically. 
She'd told me she wouldn't tease me anymore about checking out her butt, so
this couldn't be about picking on me some more.  At least, it probably
wasn't.  Still...

   I risked a glance upward as Ellie left the room, but she gave no sign of
even acknowledging me.  I really hoped that her choice of outfit hadn't
been about me at all, and that I was just reading too much into the
situation.  It was better than the alternative.

   ****

   Ellie didn't come back down to finish the movie.  I wasn't particularly
surprised by that.  Regardless of what her earlier intention had been,
getting scolded by Mom would most likely have sent her off to sulk in her
room.

   I only ran into her again when I went upstairs later, just as she was
coming out of the bathroom.  She met my gaze for a second before turning
toward her room.  I couldn't help noticing that she hadn't put on any more
clothing since I'd last seen her.

   "Thought you weren't gonna tease me anymore," I called just loudly
enough for her to hear me.

   She stopped and after a brief hesitation turned back to face me.

   "Maybe I lied," she said.

   "Yeah, maybe.  I don't think you'd do that though.  There's no point to
going out of your way to apologize, just to renege less than twenty-four
hours later."

   "Does it bug you?"

   I sighed and tried to step around her.

   "Whatever.  Come see me if and when you want to have a real
conversation."

   Ellie sidestepped to block me.  I tried going around the other way, and
again she placed herself between me and my destination.

   "Serious question," she said, somehow giving me the impression that her
next words would be anything but.  "Do you like how I look when I'm dressed
like this?"

   "Oh fuck off."

   I pushed her against the wall and tried to walk by her, but she tangled
her leg between mine and managed to stall me.

   "I just want to know is all."

   "Fine, you want more material for your oh-so-hilarious repertoire?  I
think your butt looks better when you don't wear pants.  You should prance
around in your panties all the time so I can perv on you even more.  Is
that enough?  Can you work with that?"

   "Are you mad at me?" she asked softly.

   "I'm definitely kind of annoyed.  And I have no idea at all what game
you're playing.  Maybe you'd care to let me in on it?"

   Ellie shook her head and did a good job of feigning a look of regret.  I
had to assume it was a pretense anyway, since that was the only thing that
made sense.

   "I...  I'm sorry," she said.  "I really didn't mean to do this to you."
She brushed a few errant strands of hair behind her ear, using the action
as an excuse not to make eye contact.  "I'm not sure I can really explain
why I did.  Sorry."

   "Uh huh.  It was more believable the first time."

   She shrugged and slipped away from me before retreating to her room.  I
might have simply imagined it, but it looked like her hips were swaying a
little more than necessary as she walked.  I really needed to stop watching
her ass.

   It took me a moment after Ellie had disappeared to realize that I wasn't
actually alone.  Further down the hall I could see Alice peeking her head
out from her doorway.  She smiled hesitantly when she saw that I had
noticed her.  I stayed where I was, unable to decide on a course of action,
and waited while my younger sister approached me.

   "Ellie's been acting kinda weird, huh?" Alice said.

   "Yeah, she has," I agreed.  "How much of that did you eavesdrop on?"

   Alice blushed.  "I wasn't eavesdropping.  I mean, I was gonna come out,
but then you two were talking and I didn't want to interrupt and--"

   "Let me rephrase.  How much did you hear?"

   "Not much.  Mostly I was just confused why she didn't have any pants
on."

   "Seems to be a common question this evening," I said, staring at Ellie's
closed door.  "I think she thinks it's funny.  What's bothering me is she's
not acting like she's having fun.  What's even the point of her pestering
me if she's not getting any amusement out of it?"

   "Maybe she wants attention?"

   I looked back at Alice, who once again blushed under my gaze.

   "You think so?" I asked.

   "Well...  maybe.  I mean, if so it's kind of working, right?  Maybe she
was hoping for compliments or something."

   I thought about that for a moment.  Ellie had asked me what I thought
about her appearance, though at the time I'd assumed it wasn't a genuine
question.  It wasn't inconceivable that she'd been looking for some sort of
validation rather than trying to mock me further.

   "You think she'd do that?" I asked.

   "I don't know," Alice said.  "It seems kind of weird for her, but she's
been acting weird, so...  maybe?"

   "Yeah.  Maybe."

   ****

   I waited until later to go talk to Ellie.  I wanted to make sure no one
was paying any attention when I went to see her.  Alice probably hadn't
been spying on us on purpose, but I'd still rather not risk her, or anyone
else, overhearing anything more than she already had.

   I made sure I was alone in the hallway before sneaking over to Ellie's
door.  I knocked softly and listened for a response.

   There was a pause, just long enough for me to think she might not
answer, before I heard her voice.  "Come in," she called quietly.

   "Hey," I said, pushing the door open.  "Um, can we talk for a second?"

   "Are you sure you want to?"

   Ellie had changed and was wearing one of her standard nighttime outfits.
Her pyjama pants did a much better job of covering her lower half than her
panties had.  She'd also changed shirts, but that wasn't quite as big a
deal to me.

   "Yes, I'm sure," I said.  "I think...  well, I've come to the conclusion
that maybe you weren't just being mean earlier.  If so then...  sorry for
overreacting, I guess."

   She smiled a little and gestured for me to come closer.  I walked over
and sat on the end of her bed, leaving some space between us.

   "I wasn't trying to torment you," Ellie said.  "I mean, I mostly wasn't.
But, you know, making you uncomfortable is kinda fun."

   I decided not to start an argument with her about her last statement.  I
was pretty sure she hadn't meant it that way.

   "So you, like, actually wanted me to look?" I asked.

   Ellie fidgeted with her fingers, then eventually nodded.

   "I actually did spill my drink on my pants like I said," she explained.
"But then when I took them off I kind of got ideas.  In retrospect I guess
they weren't particularly good ideas.  It's so much more obvious looking
back." She glanced at me and forced a smile that faded as quickly as it
appeared.  "I think I was just hoping for a little confidence boost if I
could get you to check me out again."

   "Even though it's such a pervy thing to do?" I asked, raising an
eyebrow.

   "Like I said, kind of a bad idea in hindsight." She shrugged.  "At least
now we're kind of even, right?"

   "I s'pose we are.  Me staring at you is no worse than you wanting me to
look."

   "So...  we're good?"

   I hesitated, then nodded.  "Yeah, we're good."

   Ellie moved to sit a little closer to me, then crossed her legs and
resumed toying with her fingers as a distraction.

   "I just need attention sometimes," she said softly, not raising her head
to look at me.  "And I don't always feel like I have any way of getting
some.  It's been worse ever since Dad left."

   "Oh," I said, trying to keep my voice neutral.

   "Yeah, I know," she said, forcing another insincere smile.  "What a
surprise that I'd end up with daddy issues, right?"

   "All things considered, I think you've been dealing with everything
pretty well."

   "'Cept for wanting the wrong kind of attention from my brother of
course," Ellie said, her voice barely loud enough to hear.

   I reached over and gently traced the side of her face with my
fingertips, brushing a few strands of hair away from her eye.  Her head
tilted almost imperceptibly toward my hand.  After a moment she finally let
her gaze meet mine.

   "There are worse ways to get attention," I said.  "And I promise I won't
say anything about it to anyone else."

   "Thanks."

   I started to pull my hand away from Ellie, but she stopped me and guided
it back.  I cupped her cheek in my palm while she closed her eyes and sat
still.  Apparently she just wanted some physical contact.  I didn't mind
helping her out with that.

   After a few minutes I shifted closer so that we were side by side.  I
guided Ellie to lean her head on my shoulder, then I put my arm around her.
She let out a small sigh and snuggled up against me.

   "Neil?"

   "Yeah?"

   "Do you want to maybe...  actually, never mind."

   "No, come on, what were you going to say?"

   Ellie shook her head.  "It's another one of my bad ideas."

   "So tell me anyway."

   "Okay, well...  I wanted to know if you'd maybe, you know, stay a
while?"

   There didn't seem to be anything too odd about her question at first. 
It took me a moment to realize that she was probably asking me to sleep
with her, rather than just sit with her.  That interpretation would explain
her hesitance at any rate.

   "Is that what you want?" I asked.

   "You don't have to.  I know it might be kind of weird.  But my bed's big
enough we wouldn't even have to be that close.  And--"

   "Ellie, I don't mind," I interrupted.  "I'm fine with the idea.  But I
should probably go get changed first."

   "Oh, yeah.  I guess you probably should."

   She reluctantly pulled away from me and allowed me to stand up.  I
smiled reassuringly, then went back to my room.  I quickly changed out of
my clothes into just a pair of boxers and a t-shirt.  I didn't always wear
a shirt to bed, but if I was going to be sharing it seemed like a good
idea.

   Ellie was in bed and under the covers when I returned.  She had propped
herself up against the headboard so she wasn't actually lying down.  I
turned off the light before slipping in beside her.  I mirrored her
half-sitting position and got comfortable.

   At first we just kind of sat in silence, but then Ellie started talking
about one of her classes from earlier in the day.  That led us into some
light conversation regarding the day's events and other such things.  I had
the sense that she didn't want to talk any more about some of the deeper
topics we'd discussed recently.  Since she didn't bring any of them up, I
didn't either.

   ****

   I was a little confused when I first woke up the next morning.  Ellie's
room looked nothing like mine, and it took me a couple seconds to remember
that I hadn't actually slept in my own bed.  I was facing away from my
sister, so I rolled onto my back and looked over at her to find that she
was still asleep beside me.

   It seemed we'd managed to stay mostly on our own sides of the bed during
the night.  The exception was Ellie's arm, which was sprawled across the
middle of the bed toward me.  I gently took her hand and moved it away from
my shoulder so as to not accidentally roll onto it.  Her alarm clock was on
her side of the bed, which meant I had to lift myself slightly to see it.
It was still early, so I settled back down where I was.  I wasn't quite
ready to get up yet.

   My sister's sleeping position was decidedly undignified.  She'd kicked
the blanket down enough that her tummy was showing where her shirt had
risen during the night.  It also appeared that she'd drooled a little as
she slept, judging by a small wet patch on her pillow near her mouth.  I
was pretty sure one of her legs was actually dangling off the side of the
bed, though the blanket made it difficult to see for certain.  I wondered
if I'd slept through a lot of tossing and turning, or if it was something
that happened naturally to her during the night.

   I rolled onto my side facing Ellie and just watched her for a moment. 
It didn't take me long to notice something I'd missed at first glance: her
shirt had somehow gotten pulled tight across her breasts.  I could even see
the faintest little bumps of her nipples through the material.  Once I
realized they were visible, it was hard to look away from them.

   It was hard to know where I stood, morally speaking.  I wasn't supposed
to be checking out my sister; that was pretty much a given.  On the other
hand I felt like the more important issue was how she would feel about it.
After the events of the previous evening, her thoughts on the matter
weren't all that clear to me.  Either way, as long as she was oblivious to
my gaze it couldn't bother her.

   Eventually I decided I should try to fix Ellie's shirt.  I was pretty
sure it was stuck underneath her, and hopefully it would come out with a
simple tug.  If I was able to free her shirt then I could rearrange it so
that it would both cover her tummy and drape more loosely across her
breasts.

   I tried pulling on her shirt from my side, only to find out that it was
caught on the other side instead.  That made things more difficult.  Short
of getting up and walking around, I wasn't sure that I could dislodge it
without disturbing her.  I reached over her as far as I could and tugged
gently, but had no success.  All I accomplished was waking Ellie.

   "Whatcha doing?" she murmured sleepily, her eyes flicking open.

   "Fixing your shirt," I answered honestly.

   "Sure you were." Ellie didn't sound like she believed me, but she also
didn't sound upset.  She stretched lazily, once again drawing my attention
to her chest.  "Because there's no way you would have taken the chance to
get in a quick feel of your unconscious little sis, is there?"

   "I didn't," I said, trying not to sound defensive.  "I was just...  your
shirt's all weird."

   I pointed at her torso as though she might not have known where to look.
She didn't so much as glance down at herself.

   "Whatever.  I don't mind.  It's not like I'd feel it anyway.  It's kinda
like a victimless crime."

   "But I really didn't do--" I stopped mid-sentence as I detected a crack
in her otherwise neutral expression.  "Oh, you're just messing with me
again, aren't you?"

   "Maybe." The smile that had been threatening to break out on her face
finally did.  "Okay, yeah, I am.  Sorry."

   "No you're not."

   "Yes, I am.  It's just so hard to pass up an opportunity to get a
reaction out of you.  I honestly don't plan these things, they just kind of
happen."

   I sighed.  "That's actually plausible."

   I reached over and pulled on her shirt, this time with more force.  The
part that had been trapped beneath her came free, and I straightened it out
so that she was covered properly.  My fingers ran along her skin a little
in the process and I found myself wanting to linger.  I resisted the urge.

   "So," Ellie said, glancing at her alarm clock, "do we get up, or do we
choose to be lazy for a while?"

   "Well, I don't want to get up, but...  yeah, I probably should.  I'd
kinda rather be up before anyone has a chance to catch me in here.  You
know."

   "That's fair.  I wouldn't really want to explain why you were sleeping
in here either.  I think I'm gonna get a few more minutes of lazy time."

   I nodded and took her hand for a second, squeezing it gently.  Then I
rolled out of bed with a groan and stumbled to the door.  I listened
briefly to make sure there were no obvious sounds of movement outside, then
exited into the hallway.  As long as I seemed to be the only one up, I
decided I might as well get a shower in while there was no one else waiting
for it.  Living with my three sisters for so long had taught me the value
of grabbing the bathroom when it was available.

   ****

   I assumed sleeping with Ellie would be a one-time deal and didn't give
it much more thought.  However, I realized that wasn't the case when she
crawled into bed with me the next night.  I kind of liked having her next
to me as I fell asleep, and waking up beside her in the morning was nice
too, so I allowed us to slide into a new routine.  We didn't sleep together
every night, but it became fairly common for us.

   My only real concern with the arrangement was that if we kept it up,
someone was bound to find out sooner or later.  I was mostly worried about
Mom finding out, since she usually woke earlier than either of the twins. I
wasn't sure what her reaction would be, and I didn't want to find out.  The
best case scenario I could come up with involved an awkward conversation at
the very least.  She was generally pretty understanding about personal
things, but that didn't make them any less embarrassing to talk about.

   Still, aside from the slight change in my relationship with Ellie,
family life continued.  I tried not to get too comfortable and let my guard
down, but it was tricky to constantly stay on alert when there was nothing
to watch out for.  Mom, Lily, and Alice all went about there lives
seemingly oblivious to anything strange going on.

   I came home late one evening after hanging out at a friend's house to
find that everyone else had gathered in the living room.  I wasn't sure
what that was about, but from what I could hear they seemed to be having a
good time.  I ran into Alice in the kitchen before I could go find out what
was going on.

   "Oh, hey Neil," Alice said.

   "Hey.  What's up with the whole...  that?" I asked, gesturing toward the
living room.

   Mom, Ellie, and Lily all burst out laughing at the same time, as if to
emphasize my question.

   "Girl night," Alice said.  "Sort of.  Not officially, but...  well, you
might want to stay clear.  Mom's letting us all have some wine, and we're
talking about, you know, girl stuff.  I think she's been missing Dad
again."

   "Oh.  Well thanks for the heads up."

   "No problem.  Do you know what we have for snacks around here?  I'm
supposed to get some.  Actually I kinda volunteered.  I've been trying not
to seem too much like I just want to go do something else."

   I smiled and gave her a quick hug.

   "Be strong, little sister.  They'll all get tired and drunk soon
enough."

   "That's what I'm hoping.  I kinda wish wine didn't taste so gross to me.
Seems like it'd be more fun if I wasn't the only sober one in there."

   "That's probably true."

   I helped Alice find some suitable food to keep the other girls
satisfied, then retreated to my room.  I admired her ability to put up with
the rest of them, but not enough to try and emulate her.  Besides, it would
probably just ruin the mood if I tried to join them.

   It wasn't that much longer before bedtime, and it was easy enough to
keep myself amused until then.  I heard the occasional sound of laughter
from downstairs, but nothing else.  I had no idea when they'd wrap up their
evening, but they weren't making enough noise to keep me from getting to
sleep, so it probably wouldn't end up mattering that much.

   I lay in bed for a little while, slowly drifting off to sleep.  I was
still awake when my door cracked open.  I opened my eyes and lifted my head
just enough to see Ellie closing the door behind her before padding over to
me.  Wordlessly she lifted the blanket and slipped in beside me as I
scooted over to give her some space to lie down.

   "Hey," she said with a faint giggle.  "I was hoping you were still
awake."

   "It was a close thing," I said.  "How drunk are you?"

   "Only a li'l," she said, holding her finger thumb about an inch apart.

   "Uh huh.  Did you drink some water?"

   "Yeah, I did.  You prolly shouldn't make me drink too much though, or I
might pee the bed."

   She giggled again, a bit louder this time.  I was kind of surprised when
she snuggled up to me, though I supposed her inebriated state might have
had something to do with that.  She didn't seem drunk enough that I had to
worry though.  At least, I hoped she wasn't.  I really didn't want to have
to clean up after her if she threw up or something.

   "I'm kind of surprised everyone else is in bed already," I said instead
of pursuing the subject of her physical well-being any further.  "You all
seemed to still be pretty rowdy not too long ago."

   Ellie shrugged.  "I don't know if they are.  I mean, they probably are
now, but I didn't want to have to wait.  It could have taken a while."

   "You at least made sure no one saw you when you came in though, right?"

   "Duh.  I'm not stupid."

   "Okay, just...  we shouldn't take unnecessary risks like that.  I don't
think either of us want to deal with the questions we'd get."

   Ellie was quiet for a moment.  I actually started to wonder if she'd
abruptly fallen asleep on me.

   "Is it that bad that we're sleeping together?" she asked softly.  "I
mean, they'd understand, wouldn't they?  Even Mom would, I think."

   "Yeah, but do you really want to find out?"

   She paused again, then shook her head.  "No, not really."

   "Okay.  So let's try to make sure it doesn't become an issue.  Alright?"

   "Mm-hm." She snuggled a little closer, then fell still.  "Neil?"

   "Yeah?"

   "G'night."

   "Night, El."

   ****

   Ellie and I were in almost the same position when I woke up the next
morning.  She was still cuddled up against me, possibly even closer than I
remembered.  I thought she must have spent the whole night like that until
she shifted slightly and I realized she was already awake.  That made it
more likely that we'd separated during the night and she'd simply moved
back to me upon waking.  It would certainly explain why my arm didn't feel
like it had been trapped under her for several hours.

   "You're allowed to leave before I get up, you know," I said.

   "Mmm, yeah, but that would deprive me of precious snuggle time," she
countered.

   "It would be safer."

   "Well...  I s'pose it would.  I can't help remembering that you never
snuck out on me though.  That's a little hypocritical of you."

   "Fair point." I yawned and stretched my free arm off to the side, then
let it fall back onto the mattress.  It wasn't really a proper stretch
without both arms.  "What time is it?"

   "I dunno.  Doesn't matter 'cause it's the weekend."

   "Whatever.  You're the one who has to sneak out of here without being
caught."

   Ellie grumbled and lifted her head, propping herself up a bit with her
arms.  Her hair was tangled and sticking out at funny angles on the side
she'd slept on, but she didn't seem to notice.  It was kind of a cute look
on her.

   "Are you trying to get rid of me?" she asked.  "Because you sound like
you are."

   "No, I'm not.  I can't help worrying is all."

   Ellie nodded, then sighed.  "I kinda wish Mom would just burst in here
right now, just so we could get all the suspense out the way."

   "There's a fair chance she'd want us to stop sleeping together."

   "Yeah, but at least then we'd know what we're up against instead of just
guessing." I started to respond, but Ellie placed a finger against my lips
to silence me.  "I know, I know.  Trust me, I understand we have to be all
stealthy and shit.  Doesn't mean I have to like it."

   She laid her head back on my shoulder and let out a long, slow breath. I
was still antsy about getting caught, particularly when I could tell the
sun had been up a little while already, but I honestly didn't want her to
leave any more than she did.  It was nice lying there with her, sharing
body heat and feeling her soft curves against me.  I noticed her breasts
pressing against me, and that brought a little guilt, but I soon stopped
worrying.

   ****

   We did eventually get out of bed, though it was late enough by that
point that everyone else had beaten us to it.  Luckily it wasn't too
difficult to smuggle Ellie out of my room.  We just had to be a little more
careful about it.

   I ran into Lily as I made my way to the kitchen.  She was in the middle
of a texting conversation with someone, but was apparently interested
enough in my arrival that her phone briefly took lower priority.

   "Are you just getting up?" Lily asked.

   "Yeah," I said.  "So what?"

   "Nothing.  Just wondering.  Do you know if Ellie's up yet?"

   If it had been anyone else I would have assumed she was just making
conversation.  Unfortunately, I sensed Lily was up to something.  Maybe it
had something to do with how quickly she'd dropped her texting in favour of
talking to me.  I didn't often rate higher than her phone.

   "How would I know if she's up?" I asked, purposefully evading the
question.  "You've been up longer than I have."

   "You're being awfully defensive."

   "And you're being awfully annoying."

   I grabbed Lily, pinning her arms to her sides before she could react. 
Despite her protests and kicks, I manhandled her toward the front door and
shoved her outside.  I closed and locked the door before she could stop me.

   I ignored her as she swore at me and pounded on the door, opting instead
to go back to my original plan of getting some food.  It was a nice day
out, so she'd be fine until she found a way back in.  If nothing else,
Ellie would probably rescue her when she came downstairs.

   ****

   Lily didn't do anything else out of the ordinary for the rest of the
day, though I wondered whether I had only imagined she was acting strangely
because of my guilty conscience.  I really hoped I wasn't becoming the sort
of paranoid person who sees accusations everywhere.  Maybe Ellie had a
point about how getting things out in the open would make things easier on
us.

   Despite Lily being fairly passive after our first encounter, I still
felt like she was giving me funny looks.  Both Lily and Alice, actually.  I
wanted to attribute it to my own sense of paranoia, but I wasn't convinced
that was all it was.

   At least Ellie and Mom were both perfectly normal around me.  That
helped convince me that I wasn't just going crazy.

   ****

   Ellie might have been the one who had needed me at first, but sleeping
with her had become just as important to me.  It was so comforting and safe
to crawl into bed next to her.  After spending the day worried that my
younger sisters suspected something, I needed the reassurance of the one
person I knew would never judge me for the secret that we shared.

   I made sure everyone was at least safely in their rooms, though probably
still awake, before going to Ellie.  Even after telling her we needed to be
careful, it was hard to follow my own advice.

   As it turned out, I walked in on my sister just as she was getting
changed.  Things were so different between us lately that I hadn't even
stopped to consider knocking first.  It didn't feel like permission was
necessary between us as far as entering each other's rooms.  I'd forgotten
that sometimes a little warning was still a good idea.

   Luckily Ellie didn't seem to mind the intrusion.  She'd been in the
process of stepping out of her pants, and she kept on going once she
verified that I was the one walking in on her.  She was still in her
panties, and I'd seen those before.

   "You mind turning around for a sec?" she asked.

   "Um, yeah, sure," I said, turning to face the wall.  "Sorry.  I didn't
realize you were changing."

   "That's okay.  It was bound to happen sooner or later the way we've been
going."

   I heard the sounds of clothes being taken off and put on, as well as a
drawer being opened and closed.  I couldn't help wanting to look during the
process, but I restrained myself.  Whatever was going on between us, it
didn't justify me trying to see my sister naked.

   "You almost done?" I asked.

   "Almost," she said.  "I'm kind of surprised I haven't caught you peeking
yet."

   "I'm not sure how to respond to that."

   "It was a joke.  Obviously not a very good one.  Anyway, I'm done now,
you can turn around."

   Ellie flipped up the covers and climbed into her bed.  I turned off the
light and followed slightly behind her.

   "How bad is it that I kind of wanted to peek?" I asked once I was
settled.

   "Um...  not that bad really.  I mean, you didn't, so it's not like you
actually did anything wrong.  It's not like I could expect your mind to
stay totally pure and innocent under the circumstances."

   "Yeah, I guess that's true."

   "And let's face it, neither of us are exactly models of innocence
anyway."

   "No, we're definitely not.  I know I lost any chance of being one a
while back."

   Ellie giggled and propped her head up on her arm.  I emulated her
movement so that we were more or less facing each other.

   "Neil, can I ask you something?"

   "Sure."

   "It's just...  it's kind of an awkward question.  But it's something
I've been wondering."

   "You can ask me anything.  I can't promise an answer until I know the
question, but you can ask."

   She hesitated and seemed to weigh her options in her mind.  I was kind
of curious about what she wanted to know, but not enough to try and hurry
her.

   "Do you ever think about me when you jerk off?" she finally blurted out.

   "Wow.  That's...  not at all what I was expecting."

   "I know.  Kind of awkward, right?  I did warn you."

   Even in the darkened room I could tell she was blushing.  Her voice
wavered, also betraying her embarrassment.

   "It's fine," I said.  "It's obviously a little weird, but it's fine. 
I'm not really sure how to answer though."

   "A yes or no would both be pretty solid choices."

   "Uh huh.  Okay, how about this.  You've clearly given the question some
thought, so I'll answer it if you do first."

   "You want me to...." She trailed off and nervously tucked her hair
behind her ear.  "Well, I guess it would be fair that way.  Okay." She
paused again and took a deep breath.  "I haven't really, you know, gotten
off while thinking about you.  Not exactly.  But yes, I have kinda sorta
had you in my head while I was playing with myself."

   The nervousness and embarrassment that she felt were even more obvious
than before.  She wouldn't even look directly at me, and I could tell she
wanted desperately to know that she wasn't alone.

   "That seems pretty similar to me," I said.  "Like, I can't help thinking
about you inappropriately sometimes.  I try not to but, you know, there are
times like at the grocery store...."

   "Can't help yourself, huh?"

   There was a trace of humour in her tone and a general sense of relief in
her posture.

   "I think it's been getting pretty clear that there are things that we
just can't help."

   "No kidding."

   Ellie shifted closer to me.  She didn't get as close as she sometimes
liked to, but it was enough that she must have felt somewhat reassured.  I
found one of her hands with mine under the blanket and squeezed it softly.
She squeezed back a little more firmly.

   We let go of each other a moment later, and Ellie moved her arm away. 
My hand was left resting on her tummy.  I didn't immediately pull away,
instead rotating my wrist slightly so that my palm was flat against the
material of her shirt.

   I could have slid my hand upward to her breasts if I wanted to.  I
wasn't sure where that thought came from, but once it was in my head I
found I couldn't get rid of it.  The closeness and intimacy we'd shared
recently were affecting me.  It was becoming all too easy to forget where
the lines were that I wasn't meant to cross.

   I briefly considered the idea of telling Ellie that we shouldn't sleep
together anymore, that we needed a certain amount of separation.  I didn't
like the idea even in my head.  I didn't want to sacrifice what we had, but
I was afraid that maybe I wanted more.

   After a moment I moved my hand down until I found the hem of Ellie's
shirt.  I slipped my fingers underneath it and slowly worked my way back to
my original position.  She didn't say anything about it, nor did I feel her
tensing up at my touch.  I let my hand rest on the bare skin of her tummy,
unwilling to go any higher, but not wanting to pull away either.

   I was drifting off.  Neither Ellie nor I moved from where we were, and
my hand stayed right where it was until we fell asleep.

   ****

   Ellie and I woke up cuddled together even closer than we had been the
night before.  That was fine with me since I loved waking up that way.  As
usual, the experience was marred somewhat by the constant nagging feeling
that we should probably get up sooner rather than later.

   Ellie finally groaned and rolled away from me.  She stood up and
stretched as I watched in undisguised fascination.  She smiled when she
caught me looking.

   "Gotta hit the bathroom," she said.  "Should maybe take a shower too. 
Although I could just come back...."

   "That'd be nice, but I should probably be getting up too," I said. 
"There's more chance of that happening if you aren't here with me."

   She nodded and left me alone in the room.  I lay there for a moment, too
comfortable to move.  I didn't really need to get up for any specific
reason, which left me precious little motivation to do so.  Part of me
hoped Ellie would come back and snuggle with me some more.

   My eyes were closed and I was in the verge of drifting back off to sleep
when I heard the door open.  I assumed it was Ellie coming back and I
smiled a little at the thought that I'd get my wish after all, despite
knowing that I really shouldn't let myself stay in bed any longer than I
already had.

   Suddenly there was a burst of movement.  Before I knew what was
happening my arms were pinned down and I found myself unable to struggle
free.  I opened my eyes to find Lily and Alice on either side of my body,
each holding down one of my arms.

   "What the fuck, Neil?!" Lily demanded in a hushed, angry voice.

   "Um, what do you mean?" I asked, my heart rate going into overdrive.

   I tried to pull my arms free again, but both of my sisters held on
tenaciously.  Working together they had the advantage, especially when I'd
been taken so completely by surprise.

   "Don't play dumb," Lily hissed.  "We caught you in Ellie's bed.  Are you
really gonna try and pretend you don't know what the problem is?"

   "What's the big deal?  We just...  we were...."

   I faltered, unable to come up with a reasonable explanation.  I
desperately hoped Ellie would walk in and rescue me.  She'd be able to
defuse the situation.

   "You've been sleeping together," Alice said in a much softer voice than
her sister.  She sounded kind of sad when she spoke, rather than displaying
the same anger as her sister.  "You've been doing it a lot.  I didn't want
to think that...  that you were...  but...."

   "Hey, Alice, come on.  It's not--"

   "Shut up!" Lily said.  "Just don't."

   I was shocked by her vehemence.  She must have assumed a lot more was
going on between Ellie and me than actually was.

   "Look," I said in the most reasonable tone I could manage.  "Can we just
talk about this?  Calmly?"

   Lily had to think about my suggestion for a few seconds.  Alice was
simply unreadable, other than the obvious fact that she was upset.

   "Fine," Lily said, lifting her weight off of my arm.  "Why don't you
explain how we shouldn't be pissed off about what you're doing to Ellie."

   "What?!  What do you mean 'what I'm doing to Ellie?' Look, I don't know
what you think is going on, but I'm not doing anything to her.  We're just
sleeping together.  That's all.  It makes her feel better, and...  well, I
kind of like it too.  But that's it."

   Lily and Alice looked at each other, communicating silently in front of
me.  Lily appeared to be at least a little bit calmer, which I took as a
good sign.  Alice still seemed pretty withdrawn.  After a moment, Lily
sighed and looked back at me.

   "I guess...  I mean, we were hoping that's all it was," she said.  "We
really didn't want it to be anything...  well, you know.  But, what you two
have been doing, it looks really...."

   "Looks really what?" I asked.

   "You could have been doing sex things," Alice mumbled.

   She looked away as soon as I shifted my gaze to her, so I looked back at
Lily.

   "Well, you two were being so sneaky about it," Lily said, sounding
slightly defensive.  "What were we supposed to think?"

   "You could have trusted us."

   "Yeah, we could have.  But if I learned one thing from Dad, it's that
you can't always trust people to do the right thing."

   I had no response to that, and the three of us fell into an
uncomfortable silence.  Lily looked like she regretted her words as soon as
she said them.

   "Well, you could have just asked," I said mostly for the sake of saying
something.  "We could have talked about it.  You didn't have to jump
straight to accusations."

   "You would have denied everything," Lily replied sullenly.  "And
besides, this is about the way you're handling things, not us."

   "You mean me and Ellie.  Why aren't you talking to her too?"

   "Because of the two of you, which one do you think is gonna get hurt? 
What do you think's gonna happen if and when you ever decide to move out?
Or if you find some other girl you want to 'sleep' with?"

   "I...  hadn't thought about that too much.  You think she'd take it
bad?"

   "Uh, gee, I don't know.  Does a girl who's sleeping with her brother for
emotional comfort sound like she'll take his rejection well?  Perceived or
otherwise?"

   "You can't abandon her," Alice added in the same soft voice she'd used
the few times she'd spoken at all.  "'Specially now."

   "I know," I said.  "I...  I know that.  I wouldn't.  But I just... 
haven't really thought about it that much."

   "Well maybe you should," Lily said.

   She and Alice climbed off of the bed and stood up.  They walked out,
leaving me alone again, only this time my head was spinning.  Mere seconds
later Ellie returned.  I wondered if Lily and Alice had heard her coming,
but didn't dwell on it.

   "Did Lil and Allie just come out of here?" Ellie asked, her forehead
wrinkled in confusion.

   "Yeah," I said.

   Ellie sat down on the edge of her bed.  Her hair was damp and she had a
towel wrapped around her body.

   "Does that mean what I think it means?" she asked.

   "If you mean 'do they know we've been sleeping together,' then yes. 
They do.  And they felt the need to berate me over it."

   "Oh.  But were they...  I mean, are things okay?  They aren't too upset
by it, are they?  Should I talk to them?"

   "Honestly, I kinda think they were just worried about you.  Like, more
worried about you than they were about the possibility that we were doing,
you know, other things."

   "Really?"

   Ellie looked surprised and glanced toward the hallway.  She chewed on
her lip and appeared to get lost in thought for a moment.

   "So, uh, maybe I should leave for now and let you get changed," I said.

   "Hm?  Oh, yeah.  Maybe." She looked down at herself and the towel that
covered her.  "This probably isn't the sort of thing I should be wearing
around you, is it?"

   "It's fine.  But...  you know."

   "Uh huh.  Wouldn't want to have it accidentally fall off or anything."

   Ellie toyed with the corner of her towel where it was tucked in.  I
immediately pictured it falling away.  I couldn't help it.  That was
probably her intention, judging by the faint smirk on her lips.

   "You shouldn't toy with me like that," I said.  "You get me too
interested in seeing what's under there and...  well, I might just have to
find out."

   We had a brief stare-off.  We each knew the other wasn't serious about
pushing things, not really, but there was still a chance that one of us
would do something stupid.  I didn't know whether I was hoping for or
against that possibility.

   Ellie pulled her hand away from the towel.  Before she could say
anything, the part she'd been fiddling with suddenly slipped.  She managed
to grab the top edge and hold it in place before her breasts were exposed,
but it was a close thing.  She sat frozen in place for a few seconds before
I reached over and carefully tucked her towel back in so it would stay put.
I couldn't help my hand brushing against her skin as I did.

   "Thanks," she said.

   "You're welcome.  I'm, uh...  I'm just gonna go."

   "Yeah, okay."

   We each forced an awkward smile, then I left.

   ****

   I didn't like not knowing exactly where I stood with any of my sisters.
Ellie and I had been going through a slow shift in our relationship, and we
hadn't quite stabilized yet.  On top of that, now I had to deal with Lily
and Alice too.

   I was pretty sure things were mostly okay between my younger sisters and
me, but at the same time I couldn't know for sure.  Even if we were good,
that could easily change if they suspected I did something wrong.  I hadn't
been entirely confident I was making the right choices with Ellie before,
and now I had to worry about how my actions appeared to others as well. 
The extra scrutiny made things even harder for me.

   Even Mom seemed to notice the tension present between her children.  It
was kind of obvious when we were having so much difficulty maintaining eye
contact and holding conversations at the dinner table.  It wasn't that any
of us refused to talk or anything, but we stuck to short, noncommittal
sentences.

   Mom pulled me aside after supper that night.  She tried to be casual
about it, but I had a distinct feeling that it was going to be another
uncomfortable conversation.

   "So what's up?" I asked her once we were alone.  I wanted to play it
casually on the off-chance my instincts were wrong.

   "Well, here's the thing, Neil," Mom said.  "I know I seem oblivious at
times, but it's pretty obvious something happened that I don't know about.
Something that affects all of my children, from what I can tell.  Now I'm
usually content to let you all work it out amongst yourselves, but I need
you to tell me that I don't need to worry about it."

   So that was why she'd chosen me.  She probably figured that if there was
something going on that she should know about, I'd be her best bet for
caving.  Well, me or Alice.  It was a bit of a toss up.

   The thing was, if any of my sisters were in any real trouble, there was
a reasonable chance I'd give in and tell Mom even if I'd been sworn to
secrecy.  I wasn't certain what particular set of circumstances it would
take, but it was a possibility.  She probably knew that as well as I did.
The thought annoyed me slightly.

   "You don't need to worry about it," I said.

   "Good.  I didn't think I did, but...  well, you know I'll always worry
about each of you.  It's just something mothers have to do."

   "I know, Mom."

   "I don't suppose you'll tell me anyway?  I can't help being curious."

   I hesitated instead of politely declining.  My knee-jerk reaction was
not to say anything, but my rational side wanted to explore the matter a
little more thoroughly.

   Lily and Alice already knew about Ellie and me sleeping together.  They
hadn't taken it all that well in some ways, but they hadn't reacted as
poorly as they could have either.  At least now it was out in the open
between us.  There was a good chance that things would go the same or
better if I told Mom.  In that moment, it seemed less likely than ever that
we could hide the truth from her indefinitely.

   I wished Ellie were there.  Or better yet, I wished I could have had a
secret conference with her beforehand.  I could always tell Mom nothing for
now, then revisit the issue later if necessary.  The problem was that if I
didn't say anything now, I'd probably lose my nerve.  It wasn't an easy
topic to bring up out of nowhere.

   "Ellie and I have been sleeping together," I blurted out.

   Mom's eyes narrowed ever so slightly before reverting to their usual
shape.

   "And when you say 'sleeping...'" she prompted.

   "I mean literally just sleeping.  It's...  look, I know we probably
shouldn't be doing it, we both know that, but it's not really a big deal. I
mean, hopefully you don't think it is."

   I watched her reaction carefully.  She didn't give much away, but at
least she didn't show any overt signs of anger.

   "Dare I ask why you two feel the need to sleep together?"

   I shrugged.  "Because it makes Ellie feel better, mostly.  Like a...  I
don't know, a security blanket or something."

   "I see.  So that's what's causing all the tension, is it?"

   "Pretty much.  I don't really want to go into details."

   I looked everywhere except directly at Mom while trying not to be
obvious that I was avoiding her gaze.  She stood there in silence for a few
seconds that seemed longer than they actually were.  I kept waiting for her
to tell me to knock it off and stop sleeping with my sister.  She would
have been justified in doing so, but I absolutely did not want to hear
those words.  I wasn't sure what I'd do in that scenario.

   "Neil?" she said eventually, her voice soft enough to give me hope.

   "Yeah?"

   "Be careful, okay?  I know you will anyway, but...  just be careful."

   ****

   "This is kinda messed up, huh?" Ellie said.

   Despite everything, she snuck into my room that night like nothing had
changed.  I wondered if she had become more dependent on me than I thought.
Maybe Lily and Alice had been right to worry.

   "It kind of is," I agreed.

   "I mean, they probably know we're together right now.  I don't even know
what to think about that."

   "Try not to.  It won't do you any good worrying about it."

   Ellie propped herself up on her elbow.  She pushed her hair behind her
ear and looked down at me.

   "Why do I get the feeling you're worrying more than I am, mister
hypocrite?"

   "I'm not worrying.  Just thinking.  And yes, that does still make me a
bit of a hypocrite.  I'm aware of that."

   "Thinking about the girls too?" she asked, nodding in the general
direction of our sisters' room.

   "Partly." I sighed and tried to work up my nerve.  I had to tell her at
some point.  "I told Mom what we were doing."

   "You did?  Why did...  oh, right, she wanted to talk to you earlier. 
She must have known something was up, huh?"

   "Kind of, yeah.  It seemed like the best course of action at the time.
I'm sorry I didn't talk to you about it first."

   "No, that's okay.  I trust your judgment.  Obviously it didn't go too
badly."

   "Yeah, I think we're fine.  At least for now."

   I rolled toward Ellie and she giggled as I enfolded her in my arms.  She
lay back down, snuggling against me like it was the most natural thing in
the world for her.  In that moment, I was so glad we didn't have to give it
all up.

   "It's all so complicated," she whispered.  "I never wanted it to be
complicated."

   "I know."

   Holding Ellie helped quiet my mind.  I decided I might be able to fall
asleep after all.  I could feel her heartbeat as we lay together.

   Suddenly she shifted.  It wasn't a very big movement, but she did roll
her head slightly so that her face was tilted upward.  Before she could
settle back down against her pillow, I took her chin in my hand and held it
in place.  Without stopping to think about it, I kissed her.  It was so
soft, our lips barely brushing together, but it was definitely a kiss. 
There was no way she could mistake it for anything else.  Even afterward I
wasn't sure why I'd done it.

   "Good night, Ellie," I whispered.

   There was a slight pause, then just as I was beginning to worry I
shouldn't have done anything after all, she spoke.

   "Night, Neil."

   ****

   I felt like the interactions between family members were less strained
at breakfast than they'd been at supper the night before.  Maybe I was just
in an optimistic mood.  I'd come to the realization that given everything
that had happened the day before, things had turned out pretty well.

   The best part was that no one was actively upset with me.  Every member
of my family had a reason to be, if they so chose, but interactions with
each of them remained perfectly civil.  Things weren't quite back to
normal, but I felt confident that we could get there.

   More than anything, I was glad that Ellie hadn't reacted badly to me
kissing her.  I hated knowing that I could easily have made her
uncomfortable over something that I didn't even have a good reason to do. I
resolved to stick with hugs in the future if I needed a way to show
affection.  They were a much safer bet.

   As usual, Ellie and I drove together to the university campus that
morning.  She was unusually quiet, though, spending most of the trip
staring out the window at the passing scenery.  She seemed to be in a
contemplative sort of mood.  I hoped that's what it was, at any rate. 
There was a chance she just didn't want to talk to me, but I didn't think
that was the case.

   "What're you thinking about?" I asked after several minutes of silence.

   "Hm?  Oh, just stuff," Ellie said.  "Nothing important."

   "Okay." I wanted to leave it there, but I still had a nagging little
fear in the back of my mind.  "Ellie, we're good, right?"

   "What do you mean?" She looked over at me with a hint of a smile on her
lips and an arched eyebrow.  "Is there any reason we wouldn't be?"

   "I don't know.  I'm just, like...  I kissed you last night.  I don't
know why I did it, and I don't really know what you think about it, and I
hope you didn't mind too much 'cause you don't seem like you did, and...."

   I trailed off from my nervous, rambling sentence partly because I didn't
really have anything else to say.  Perhaps more importantly, Ellie's grin
had gotten noticeably wider while I'd been speaking.

   "You were still worrying about that?" she asked.

   "Kind of.  Just a little."

   "Well don't.  I kinda liked it."

   "Really?"

   "Yeah.  I was surprised that you did it, but...  it was nice.  It really
was."

   I couldn't help matching Ellie's smile.  There was no doubt in my mind
that she meant every word of what she said.  I should have known better
than to think I'd done something wrong.  The sibling bond between us had
grown into something more lately, something stronger.  One small action
wouldn't be enough to do any real damage to that.

   Once we arrived and I found a parking space, we still had to head in the
same direction for a bit before we split off to our respective
destinations. It was pretty common for us to walk together, side by side
during these brief intervals.  Ellie slipping her hand over to mine and
entwining our fingers, however, was not so usual.  She caught my expression
of confusion, but only laughed at it.

   "What's the matter, don't wanna hold hands with your sister?"

   "It's not that I don't want to.  I just want to know what you plan on
doing when someone sees us.  'Cause you know those awkward conversations I
had to have with Lily and Alice and Mom?  I'm not really in the mood for
more of them."

   "You're overthinking things.  No one'll even notice.  Plus, holding
hands is nowhere near as sketchy as being caught sleeping together."

   "That's...  a fair point actually."

   "Damn skippy it is."

   We walked for another couple of minutes before hitting the point where
our paths diverged.  As far as I could tell, no one had given us a second
glance.  Granted, to anyone who didn't know we were siblings we weren't
really doing anything that would have drawn attention.  Either no one who
knew any better had seen us, or Ellie was right and I was worrying too
much.

   "Okay," Ellie said, finally letting go of my hand.  "I'll see ya later."

   I started to say goodbye to her too, only to have her interrupt me with
a light kiss.  She grinned impishly and skipped away before I could
reorganize my thoughts.  Instead of going after her, I shook my head and
kept walking.  She knew the risks of pulling stunts like that just as well
as I did.  Chastising her wouldn't help anything.

   It took me the rest of the morning to admit that I actually didn't mind
Ellie kissing me.  I had tried to view the matter from a practical
standpoint, but my emotional side wouldn't have that.  Every time I thought
of my sister's lips against mine, out in the open where anyone could see, I
couldn't help smiling just a little.

   ****

   Ellie didn't try kissing me in public again for the next few days.  She
must have known it'd be harder to catch me with my guard down a second
time. The thing was, I honestly wasn't sure whether or not I'd stop her if
she tried.  I was conflicted, and there were plenty of other small changes
in our relationship that kept me from focusing on that one question too
much.

   Now that the other members of our family knew Ellie and I were sleeping
together, it meant we didn't have to be quite so careful anymore.  For the
most part everyone seemed to get used to the idea of either Ellie or me
being in the other's room.  We didn't draw attention to it, but we didn't
try to hide it either.  Since everyone already knew what we were doing,
being open about our activities was probably better than sneaking around.

   Another thing I noticed was that Ellie was getting far more comfortable
with casual displays of affection.  The public kiss she'd given me had been
the most obvious sign of the change, but there were other, less dramatic
examples.  For instance, I was sitting on the couch one evening because
Alice had gotten to my favourite chair before me.  Ellie came in a little
later on and before she even greeted me, she sat down and curled right up
next to me.

   "What ya reading?" Ellie asked me.

   "Nothing you'd be interested in," I said.

   "Fine, be that way."

   Ellie turned her attention to the TV show Alice was watching.  She might
have been interested in it, but I was pretty sure she was more interested
in getting some cuddle time.

   I continued reading my book, though I wasn't as oblivious as I
pretended. It was next to impossible not to notice the way she leaned her
head on me, or the slight pressure of her breast against my arm.  It was a
comfortable feeling, though a little distracting.

   I looked up from my reading every now and then.  Sometimes I'd watch the
movie for a minute or two before going back to my book, and sometimes I'd
just take a quick look around the room.  It wasn't something I did on
purpose so much, although I did like keeping track of my surroundings.

   Eventually I noticed that Alice was occasionally glancing toward me and
Ellie.  She never looked for very long, and never when she thought she was
being observed.  As far as I could tell, we weren't doing anything to
warrant the attention.  Then I wondered if it was simply our close
proximity.

   "I think we're weirding her out a little," I whispered to Ellie.

   "Who, Alice?" she whispered back

   "Yeah.  Maybe.  She keeps looking at us."

   Ellie was quiet for a moment as though giving due consideration to my
suspicions.  I pretended I was still reading, though mostly I was actually
watching Alice out of the corner of my eye.

   "You're right," Ellie whispered.  "She is watching us.  You think it
bothers her?  Me being this close to you and all?"

   "I don't know what else it could be."

   "Okay, go get a drink or something."

   "What?  Why?"

   "Doesn't matter.  Just need you out of the room for a couple minutes."

   "I...  fine."

   I got up and stretched, then left the room.  I didn't know what Ellie
was up to, but I was more than okay with letting her handle the situation.
All I needed to worry about was giving her enough time to do whatever it
was she had planned.  She probably just wanted to talk to Alice, and felt
that such a conversation would go better without me there.

   I let almost five minutes go by before returning.  Ellie hadn't given me
a particularly precise amount of time to wait, so I wanted to leave a
little extra as a precaution.  When I reentered the room, my two sisters
were both on the couch curled up together and sharing a blanket.  I heard
quiet conversation going on between them that abruptly cut off as I got
closer.

   "You've been voted off the couch," Ellie informed me.

   "I have, have I?"

   "Mm-hm.  I got a new cuddle buddy."

   Alice giggled as Ellie put her arm around her younger sister.  I wasn't
sure what to make of the scene.  Since they were both on the couch, that
left the comfy chair open, so there was at least a consolation prize.

   I grabbed my book and settled in to read some more.  I did my best to
ignore the occasional whispers and giggling from the girls.  As long as
they were enjoying themselves, everything was fine.  I much preferred being
temporarily left out to worrying about Alice's mood.

   ****

   I got a chance to talk to Ellie later on when we went to bed.  I got
distracted at first because her nightwear turned out to be panties and a
camisole, which was less than I was used to her wearing.  Her outfit left
her legs bare and drew my attention to her butt when she turned away from
me.  Once she crawled into bed with me, it wasn't quite as distracting.

   "So what was the deal with Alice earlier?" I asked.

   "Oh, that?" Ellie said.  "I thought you would have figured that out."

   "Well...  not really.  That's why I'm asking.  I mean, obviously you
said or did something to make it better.  Was she just jealous or
something? Did she want some of those cuddles I was getting?"

   "I know you're just being a smartass, but you're actually not that far
off.  Think about it.  Why have we been sleeping together?"

   "Because...." I had to pause and think about it for a moment.  "Because
you wanted me to stay with you, and it was nice, and then we didn't stop."

   "Right.  Sort of.  I needed attention and some physical affection. 
That's what Allie needed too.  She might need some more every now and then.
You know, so she knows she's not getting ignored or anything."

   "Well aren't you being a good big sis."

   I threw my arm around Ellie and pulled her toward me.  She giggled and
allowed herself to be repositioned.  I spooned up to her, pressing my body
against her back.  She put her arm over mine and squeezed the back of my
hand in hers.  I kissed her shoulder and we both lay still for a while.

   I hadn't been aware at first of just how much of our skin was touching.
Between Ellie's skimpier than usual outfit and the way our bodies were
pressed together, I was able to feel more of her than I'd ever felt before.
Even though we both knew there was something not quite platonic about our
relationship, we had kept it hidden away and only acknowledged it
indirectly.  As much as I wanted to stay right where I was, that would make
things complicated.

   "Maybe we shouldn't sleep like this," I whispered.

   "What?  Why?  What's wrong?"

   "Um...  well, you know how you usually wear, like, pyjama pants or
something?  Or at least a loose t-shirt?"

   "Mm-hm.  I thought this'd be okay.  I can go change if it's not.  I
mean--"

   "You're gonna get poked in the butt pretty soon if we stay like this," I
said, dropping any attempt at subtlety.  "I'm sorry, I can't really help
it."

   I rolled onto my back, away from my sister's soft curves and smooth
skin. I had a partial erection already, but I hoped it would settle down on
its own if I just waited a minute or two.

   Ellie giggled and turned in place so she was facing me.  She scooted
closer and rested her head on my arm.

   "Don't be sorry," she said.  "I should have known better than to wear
this to bed.  I just got too comfortable with us being together like this.
Though now that I think about it, I'm kinda surprised you haven't, you
know, 'poked' me before."

   "Usually it's easier to hide it if I react like that," I said.  Now that
the subject had been brought up, it didn't seem like an awkward thing to
talk about.  I felt none of the expected shame or embarrassment admitting
that she turned me on.  "And sometimes it's not an issue at all.  But you
very nearly being in your underwear certainly isn't helping anything."

   "Sorry," she said, along with another soft giggle.  "All things
considered, we've been doing pretty well though, haven't we?  We've behaved
ourselves and everything."

   "I s'pose."

   "I mean, you haven't even really tried to feel me up or anything.  I
still catch you looking sometimes, but...  nothing inappropriate.  Not
really."

   "You sound like you expect me to be more of a perv.  I might be hurt by
that.  And what about you?  How come you're acting like I'm the only one
who could do something wrong?"

   "I didn't say it was wrong," Ellie whispered.  "And I didn't say you
were the only one.  It just would have been nice to have a better idea of
how you're going to react to this."

   I bit back my question of what she meant when I felt her hand on my
chest.  Her palm and fingers pressed gently against me, then slowly slid
down to my stomach.  I had a feeling that she had yet to reach her intended
destination.

   "This isn't something we should do," she continued.  "I know that, and
you know that.  If you tell me to stop, I will."

   My muscles tensed involuntarily as my sister's hand slipped into my
boxers and brushed my cock.  I had started to soften, but was still partly
erect.  She delicately encircled my shaft with her fingers, gripping it
just tightly enough that there was no mistaking her intentions.

   Ellie's breasts pressed against my arm as she leaned closer.  I felt her
warm breath on my face as she watched me intently.  My cock hardened in her
hand, but she didn't move it other than to adjust her grip slightly.  She
must have wanted confirmation that it was okay, that I wanted her to
proceed.

   It was hard to move.  The truth was that I'd checked out my sister more
than once.  I'd tried not to make it overly sexual, we both had, but maybe
that had just been a band-aid solution.  I felt horribly conflicted, but
whether it was right or wrong, I liked feeling her hand on my cock.

   And yes, I wanted her to keep going.

   How could I say that to Ellie?  Obviously I could just tell her that I
was okay with her jerking me off, but somehow that didn't seem quite right.
Part of me felt that acknowledging exactly what she was doing out loud
would make it worse in some way.

   I looked up at her, and I suddenly knew what to do.  She was still
looking directly at me, and her face was so close to mine.  I lifted myself
a little and kissed her.

   Unlike both of our other kisses, this one lingered.  It was still gentle
and relatively chaste, but there was love behind it.  Maybe a little bit of
lust too.  I couldn't help that I was horny.

   Ellie read the gesture exactly as I hoped she would.  Even before we
broke the kiss, she tightened her grip on my cock and began stroking it.  I
was fully hard by now.  Her fingers felt so small and delicate compared to
mine.  She didn't have the same experience I had at getting myself off, but
that hardly mattered.  As much as I hated to admit it, I was actually
getting more turned on because it was my sister touching me.  I wondered
how she'd react if she knew.

   Ellie gradually became more sure of herself as she continued jerking me
off.  The way her fingers gripped me had been a little tentative at first,
but that changed as her confidence grew.

   "Is that okay?" she asked.

   "Yeah," I said.  "That's definitely okay."

   She nodded, then looked down to where the blanket covered her hand.  She
let go of my cock for a moment and used both of her hands to pull my boxers
down.

   "Now I've got a little more room to work with," she said, as if I
required an explanation.  "And it's not like I can see anything either
way."

   "You think that'd be worse?  If you could see it?"

   "Maybe.  I dunno.  Do you not?"

   "I think that under the circumstances it'd probably be okay."

   "S'that so."

   Ellie gave my cock an extra squeeze and grinned mischievously.  I
couldn't help feeling like she was planning something, and that I may have
inadvertently given her permission.  She sped up her strokes a little, but
otherwise didn't immediately act on whatever naughty thoughts she might
have had.

   I, however, was feeling brave enough, or maybe just horny enough, to act
on some thoughts of my own.  Ellie's breasts had been drawing my attention
as they jiggled slightly in time to her arm's movement.  Her top had been
pulled tight across them, accentuating their curves.

   I moved slowly, much as she had when going for my cock.  I didn't want
to get in her way, but I also didn't want to just make a grab for her
boobs. I compromised by placing my palm against her tummy, directly below
the swell of her breasts.  She would either react to that, or she wouldn't.

   "You missed my boobs," she said.

   "It was that obvious, was it?"

   "Unless you've got some kind of bizarre tummy fetish, then yeah."

   Ellie gave me a teasing grin and I couldn't help smiling back.  She knew
me too well.  Granted, I intentionally hadn't been all that subtle about my
intentions.

   I eased my hand upward to cup one of her breasts in my palm.  The flimsy
material of her camisole wasn't much of a barrier between us, but while I
felt the warmth and softness underneath, it was still more of a barrier
than I wanted.  If I was going to feel up my sister, I might as well do it
right.

   I reached lower, still doing my best not to bump the arm she was using
to jerk me off, and slipped my hand under her top.  Her naked skin felt so
much better.  I couldn't believe I'd almost allowed myself to be content
with touching her over her clothes.

   Ellie's efforts were paying off.  Between her stroking and my fondling,
I was seriously aroused.  If she kept going the way she was, she'd finish
me off soon.

   "You're gonna make a pretty big mess, aren't you?" she said, as though
only just realizing that I was going to cum.  To be fair, I hadn't really
thought that far ahead either.

   "I guess so," I said.

   She bit her lip in thought.

   "'Kay.  Don't freak out about this."

   "About what?"

   Ellie didn't answer my question.  Instead, she stopped stroking me
briefly and raised herself to her knees.  She pushed back the blanket that
had been covering us so that my cock was exposed.  I'd told her that I
didn't mind if she saw it, but I hadn't expected her to actually take me up
on the offer.

   She gathered her hair in her hands, pushing it back over her shoulders
before leaning down.  I only realized what she was up to at the very last
second.  She gripped the base of my shaft, holding it steady as she took me
in her mouth.

   I couldn't speak.  I couldn't move.  I couldn't react in any way.  My
sister's lips were wrapped around the head of my cock.  I had no idea how
to feel about that, and the pleasure and uncertainty overwhelmed me.

   "Oh fuck, Ellie," I moaned, finally able to vocalize something.

   She didn't take the time to respond to me.  Her lips remained sealed
around the tip of my erection while she stroked me with her hand.  She
wasn't giving me a blowjob, not really, but just the fact that her mouth
was involved dramatically changed the sensation.  It was so, so wrong for
my little sister to be doing what she was doing.  It worried me how much I
was turned on by it.

   "M'gonna cum," I breathed, trying to give Ellie what warning I could.

   She ignored me, but I knew she'd heard.  It dawned on me just before I
reached the point of exploding that this was her version of preventing a
mess.  She was going to take my cum in her mouth instead of letting it
shoot all over us and the bedding.  That thought was the last one I had
before I closed my eyes and embraced the rush of orgasm.

   I felt the first pulse of cum shoot forcefully into my sister's mouth.
It was so different from getting myself off; everything was more intense
somehow.  Ellie, the source of all my pleasure, kept her lips locked on me
the whole time.  I wasn't watching, but I was pretty sure she didn't spill
a drop.

   As quickly as it had started, it was over.  I was left feeling somewhat
drained, but also very satisfied.

   "Thank you," I said.

   Ellie was still kneeling beside me and looked slightly embarrassed at
being thanked.

   "Ur wel-hum?" she said before swallowing audibly.

   We watched each other awkwardly for a moment, neither of us quite sure
how to proceed.  Eventually she stretched back out beside me and pulled the
covers back up over us.  I pulled my boxers back into place too.

   "That's one way to avoid a mess," I said.

   "Mm-hm.  I wasn't sure how you were gonna feel about that."

   "Well, I might only be feeling this way because you just got me off, but
I'm pretty okay with it."

   "That sort of thing does have a way of altering one's perspective."

   I nodded and let out a deep breath.  I was ready for sleep.  It took me
a moment to realize that Ellie wasn't acting quite as calm and relaxed as I
was.  She was mostly lying still, but she also seemed a bit fidgety.

   "Ellie?"

   "Yeah?"

   "Do we need to take care of you now?"

   She bit her lip and looked away for a second.

   "I was kinda thinking about that," she admitted.  "I'm a little worked
up after...  you know.  But I'm just...  I'm not sure."

   "Not sure about what?"

   "This might be silly considering what I just did, but I'm feeling kind
of shy about it.  I shouldn't feel that way, but I do."

   I rolled on my side facing her, propping my head up on my arm.

   "Well, I could give you some privacy if you want," I said.  "I mean, I
don't want it to be uncomfortable for you."

   "No, that's okay.  Just...  just stay there."

   Ellie got settled in on her back and closed her eyes.  Her hands were
both under the covers, and even though I couldn't see exactly what she was
doing, I could make a pretty good guess from the faint movements of the
blanket.  There was a small patch around her waist that kept moving ever so
slightly.

   Very little space separated us.  I knew better than to try touching her
while she masturbated, but I was surprised she was okay with me watching so
closely.  To me that seemed like the more embarrassing option.  Still, it
was her call.  I had no intention of questioning her decision.

   Watching her face was interesting.  Her mouth was slightly open, her
breathing ragged, her lips twitching every now and then from the pleasure
she was causing herself.  I had to force my gaze away, even though there
wasn't much else to look at.  It was too tempting to lean over and kiss
her.

   Ellie finally came, punctuating the event with a faint moan.  It was the
only sound she'd made the whole time, aside from her breathing and the
faint rustling of the blanket.  Her arm moved with extra vigour for a
moment, and her mouth opened even wider so it was almost a circle, then
abruptly she fell still.  Her eyes fluttered open and she grinned
sheepishly at me.

   "Better?" I asked.

   "Yeah.  Better."

   I gave her the kiss I'd restrained myself from earlier, then cuddled up
to her.  She sighed contentedly and pulled the covers up around us so that
only our heads stuck out.  Sleep came easily.

   ****

   I noticed over the next few days that I was more comfortable about
displaying affection toward Ellie with other people around.  It seemed more
natural the closer we got.  Things like holding hands, or sitting close
together, or sharing quick kisses didn't seem like such a big deal anymore.
I knew we were asking for trouble, but I couldn't bring myself to worry
about it.

   The rest of our family seemed to come to a grudging acceptance of the
increased closeness between Ellie and me.  I still caught Mom looking
concerned every now and then, and Lily liked to roll her eyes and make
faces any time she saw us doing anything too couple-y.  Alice took to it
the best.  As long as she got a little attention occasionally and didn't
feel like she was being left out, she was happy enough.

   Arguably the biggest difference in our relationship was our changes in
behaviour in bed.  Ellie jerking me off had opened the door to more overtly
sexual touching than before.  We also got into the habit of masturbating
with the other present.  It became almost normal for us to each get
ourselves off before going to sleep.  Sometimes we'd help each other, but
not always.

   Being around Ellie was getting to be indistinguishable from spending
time with a girlfriend, albeit one I couldn't openly date.  I wasn't sure
what that meant for us.  I was enjoying it though, and so was she, so I was
okay with waiting and seeing where it went.

   Ellie seemed to settle into her role as half of our pseudo-couple even
better than I did.  I had to wonder if she wanted to draw attention
sometimes, the way she got all touchy-feely.  One evening she decided to do
some school work in the living room, lying down on the floor with her
laptop in front of her while I was reading in my usual spot.  With a little
whining she managed to convince me to sit next to her and give her a back
rub with my free hand.  I assumed that had been her intent all along. 
There really wasn't any other reason for her to lie on the floor like that.

   Lily walked in a few minutes after Ellie and I had gotten settled.  She
took one look at us and stopped halfway to the couch.

   "Oh god, you two.  Seriously?" she said.

   "What?" I asked.  "We're not doing anything."

   "Right," Lily said, rolling her eyes.  "'Cause giving back rubs is
completely normal for you.  I'm sure it has nothing to do with you two
sleeping together."

   "We're not doing anything wrong," Ellie said.

   "You keep saying that.  You keep trying to convince us all that you two
aren't up to anything.  You're just sleeping together.  Well you know what?
Even if that's all it is, it's only a matter of time before something
changes."

   "What are implying?" I asked, pulling my hand away from Ellie's back.

   "You know what I'm implying.  You're always together and you're always
touching each other.  It's only getting worse.  Either you're gonna go too
far, or one of you is going to get hurt.  You're just gonna end up breaking
this family up again one way or the other."

   Lily turned around and left the room, ignoring Ellie's calls for her to
come back.  I didn't know what to do and just kind of sat there hoping a
brilliant idea would come to me.

   "Shit," I finally said.

   "Yeah," Ellie said.  "That about sums it up." She rolled onto her back
and lay there unhappily.  "The worst part is she's not wrong."

   "Maybe, but...  I mean, she's not completely right either.  We're not
gonna break up the family.  That's not going to happen."

   "But what if we do?"

   "We won't," I said firmly.  I managed to sound more confident than I
felt.  "That can only happen if we let it."

   "Lily's right though, one of us could get hurt," Ellie said softly.  "It
could happen.  I know you don't think so, but it could."

   "Well...  I don't know what we're supposed to do then."

   "Neither do I." Ellie chewed on her lip, then looked directly at me. 
"Hey, Neil?"

   "Yeah?"

   "Tell me it'll be okay."

   I forced a smile that I didn't really feel.  I hoped it looked
reassuring.

   "It'll be okay, El.  We'll all be okay."

   ****

   Things were a little strained between us and Lily after our brief
conversation.  She didn't exactly avoid Ellie or me, but she very pointedly
ignored or rebuffed any attempt to talk about her problem with our
relationship.  I got the impression that she was at least slightly
embarrassed about her outburst though.  That was a small comfort.

   Family life adapted as necessary.  Everyone was getting used to Ellie
and me being nigh-inseparable, as far as I could tell.  We were getting
fewer disapproving or concerned looks, at any rate.  Mom even started
assigning tasks to both of us in cases where she would have ordinarily just
asked one of us to do something for her.  She had learned that we'd almost
certainly cooperate on them anyway.

   All of that lead to me washing dishes one evening while Ellie dried
them. Usually I would have just left them in the dish rack until they were
dry, but as long as we were working as a team we could get the whole thing
done much faster.

   "I should probably do some studying later on," Ellie said as she put a
small stack of dried plates into their spot in the cupboard.  "Got a test
coming up.  Thought maybe you'd like to help me?"

   "Help, or 'help?'" I asked, pulling my hands out of the dishwater long
enough to make finger quotes.

   Ellie grinned and bumped me with her hip.

   "Maybe a little of both."

   She leaned over and kissed me, while I carefully made sure my wet hands
stayed out of the way.  One of her breasts brushed my arm during the
maneuver.  I was pretty sure that was on purpose.

   "You guys need to put up a warning sign or something."

   Ellie and I each did a half-turn to look behind us to find Lily standing
there with her arms folded across her chest.  Her stance didn't appear to
be confrontational, but she certainly didn't look at ease either.

   "Sorry," Ellie said.

   Lily shrugged uncomfortably.  "Whatever.  I should probably just get
used to it.  You two obviously aren't gonna stop."

   "We really don't mean to make things weird for you," I said.

   "I know," Lily said.  "Trust me, I know.  I just...." She sighed heavily
and shook her head.  "I wanted to say sorry for...  for when I snapped at
you two.  I mean, you're happy, right?  You guys seem happy anyway.  I
shouldn't get in the way of that."

   "Aw, Lil," Ellie said, stepping toward her sister.

   Lily took a half step back, but Ellie kept closing the distance and
managed to pull her into a hug.  Lily didn't hug back, but she also didn't
fight it.

   "I just want things to be normal," Lily said.  "As normal as they can
be. You know, under the circumstances.  If I stop talking to you two,
that's not really helping anything."

   "You're right," Ellie said.  "And for what it's worth, we truly are
sorry that what we're doing is affecting you and Mom and Alice.  We didn't
want that."

   "I know," Lily said, finally struggling free of her older sister's
embrace.  "But now it's out, and we all just have to deal with it.  Just...
just do one thing for me."

   "What is it?"

   "When you have sex, try to be subtle about it."

   "We're not having sex!" Ellie and I said almost simultaneously.  I
realized afterward how defensive we sounded.

   "Maybe you're not," Lily said with a shrug.  "But you will.  When you
do...  Mom doesn't need to know about it.  Allie doesn't either, but
honestly she might be okay with it.  It's hard to tell with her."

   "Um...  okay," Ellie said.  I was glad she was able to form a reply,
because I didn't know if I could have come up with anything coherent. 
"We'll, uh, keep that in mind."

   "Yeah, well...  yeah," Lily said.  "Good."

   She gave another shrug, then left.  Ellie and I stared at each other in
a long moment of silence.

   "She's too cynical for her own good," I said eventually.

   "Too cynical for anyone's good," Ellie countered.  She returned to her
former position by the counter and picked up her dishtowel.  "And probably
a little too clever in some ways.  Which I don't think is something I've
ever had to say about her before."

   I chuckled, but Ellie had a point.  Lily was bright enough, but that
tended to be overshadowed by her tendencies toward rebellion and
overreaction.  At least I knew her heart was in the right place in this
case.  She'd only been looking out for her family.

   "Do you think she was right?" I asked.  "About the whole...  you know...
the whole sex thing?"

   "Do you think she was?"

   "I don't know.  I really don't.  Not too long ago I would have said she
was crazy, but now...."

   Ellie nodded.  "Yeah.  That's about how I feel too."

   I kept washing, though I was nearly done.  I actually kind of wished
there were more dishes to do just so I'd have something to help me stall
for time.  It probably wouldn't have helped anyway.  There was a question I
needed to ask, and procrastinating wouldn't make it go away.

   "If we're not saying it won't happen, does that mean it probably will?"
I asked.

   Ellie frowned for a second, then looked over her shoulder to make sure
no one was listening.  I'd been keeping an ear out for someone sneaking up
ever since Lily had caught us by surprise, but it still wasn't a bad idea
for her to double check.

   "Let me put it this way," she said.  "If I crawled into bed with you
tonight, completely naked, what would you do?"

   "That's not fair, El.  That is so not a fair question."

   "I know.  You don't have to answer.  I don't really have a proper answer
for you either."

   I finished the last few pieces of silverware at the bottom of the sink
and handed them to Ellie.  I dried my hands slowly with a spare towel while
I waited for her to finish.  Despite my initial uncertainty, the more I
thought about her question, the more I realized that I actually did have an
idea what I'd do.

   "If you crawled into bed with me naked," I said slowly, "there is a
reasonable chance that we'd end up having sex."

   She arched an eyebrow.  "A reasonable chance?  What does that mean
exactly?"

   "I don't know," I answered honestly.  "I really don't.  Except that it
definitely could happen.  If that's not enough of an answer then...  you'll
just have to try it and find out."

   "Careful.  Don't say things like that, 'cause I might just take you up
on it."

   "I'll take my chances."

   "Mm-hm.  Well, don't say I didn't warn you." She set her towel down and
surveyed the room.  "Anyway, I think we're done here.  Wanna come help me
with my studying now?  There really are a couple things I'd like you to
look at with me.  If you want."

   "Yeah, sure.  Why not."

   ****

   In hindsight, I should have suspected that Ellie was scheming something.
I didn't stick around and help her study for too long, but while I was
there she seemed more distracted than usual.  She wasn't really paying
attention to the work at all.  It was her test we were preparing for, so it
didn't bother me all that much if she didn't want to focus.

   I went and did my own thing for the rest of the evening until bedtime.
As much as I loved my sister and hanging out with her, it was kind of nice
to get a little alone time too.  Still, just like every night since we'd
started sleeping together, I found myself looking forward to curling up in
bed with her.

   I was in the process of stripping down for the night when Ellie walked
into my room and quietly closed the door behind her.  We'd gotten pretty in
sync with our bedtimes, though we still didn't really plan out whose room
we'd use on a given night.  In any case, it didn't surprise me when she
walked in on me in the middle of changing.

   "Hey," I said.  "Good timing.  I'm almost ready."

   "Uh huh," she said.

   She watched me as I removed my shirt and left myself in only my
underwear.  I planned on putting on a baggier, more comfortable shirt for
the night, although I didn't really need to.  I'd gone topless a couple
times while sleeping with her.  The only real downside to it was that it
made keeping our hands off of each other that much trickier.  The whole
point was to sleep, after all.

   "Neil?" she said.

   "Yeah?" I said, glancing at her for a second.

   She was wearing a long t-shirt that went down just far enough to cover
her panties.  I realized belatedly that it looked like one of mine.  Seeing
her using one of my shirts as nightwear was kind of hot.

   "Neil?" she repeated more insistently.

   "What?" I said, turning around fully this time.

   Once she was sure she had my attention she grabbed the bottom of her
shirt with both hands.

   "Remember what you were saying earlier?" she asked.  "About me crawling
into bed naked with you?"

   Without waiting for an answer, she pulled the shirt up and over her head
in one long, smooth motion.  My eyes widened and fixed themselves on each
part of her body as it was revealed to me.  We'd been getting fairly
adventurous lately, but I'd never come close to seeing her fully naked body
in a well-lit room.  Up to then it had just been little flashes here and
there in the dark.

   Ellie was not, in fact, wearing panties as I'd assumed she was.  Her
pussy was the first thing revealed, and it was shaved completely bare.  It
looked so smooth and sexy that I had to force myself to keep my gaze moving
as more of her body came into view.

   My gaze traveled upward over her tummy and belly button to her breasts
which bounced slightly as were freed from their shirt-prison.  Just like
her pussy, I wanted to stop and stare at her boobs.  They were so round, so
perky, so perfectly shaped.

   And then there was Ellie's face.  She had her bottom lip between her
teeth and managed to looked both amused and nervous at the same time.  She
was waiting for my reaction.

   "If you're trying to turn me on," I said, "mission fucking
accomplished."

   "Enjoying the view, huh?"

   "Did you think I wouldn't?"

   Ellie clasped her hands behind her back and stuck her chest out a little
bit more.  She took a couple steps toward me so that she was right in front
of me.  Much of her nervousness seemed to have left her already.

   "I was worried you might not," she said.  "I mean, I knew you'd like
seeing me naked, but I still worried maybe you wouldn't.  Kinda weird,
right?"

   "It's not that weird.  This is...  what we're doing...  it's all so
complicated.  Things aren't going to be simple."

   I reached out and lightly placed my hands on her hips.  I trailed my
fingertips up the sides of her body, then back down.  There were other
places--dirtier places--I wanted to touch, but I held myself back.

   "Well they don't have to be complicated," Ellie whispered.  "Not always.
We could make things simple for a little while."

   My cock had begun to harden when she'd taken her shirt off, enough that
it was clearly visible as it strained against my underwear.  She
deliberately brushed her fingers against my cock, sending a shiver of
pleasure through my body.

   "Simple sounds good," I said.

   "Mm-hm.  Thought you might think so."

   Our lips met in a gentle kiss that grew deeper and more passionate the
longer we held it.  All my restraint, denial, and fears slowly melted away.
It seemed so stupid to pretend I didn't want this.  That's what it had
been, a pretense.  At some point Ellie and I had become something different
from a regular brother and sister.  I wasn't sure when exactly, but I
realized that I'd been trying to hide from the truth, and that was no
longer an option.

   I felt Ellie's breasts against me, bare skin against bare skin.  I felt
her hands on me, exploring my body just as I was exploring hers.  I
abandoned my earlier sense of caution and touched her anywhere I wanted to.
She moaned into my mouth as I grabbed her ass in both hands.  I lifted her
slightly, forcing her to balance on her toes and causing her to lean on me
even more to keep from falling over.

   "I love you, El," I said.

   "Well duh," she said with a faint smirk.  She gave me another quick
kiss, then leaned to the side so she could whisper in my ear.  "I love you
too."

   I groaned as she pressed her leg against my increasingly hard cock.  I
wanted to get my underwear off, to free my erection and eliminate the last
barrier between us, but I was unwilling to let go of my sister.  She
continued grinding on me, making my choice a difficult one.

   I compromised.  If Ellie was going to tease me, then I could tease her
right back.  I moved one of my hands from her ass around to her pussy.  It
was just as smooth to the touch as it looked.  I ran my fingers over it,
smiling as she gasped at the sudden stimulation.

   She was wet before I reached her slit.  She only got wetter as I stroked
her, not quite pushing my way in but threatening to.  I spread her juices
across her pussy lips with my fingertips, making the whole area slick.  I
knew I could get a finger inside her if I wanted to, but I was still just
teasing her.  The longer I played with her, the more she whined in
disappointment when I refused to give her what she really wanted.

   Ellie had gradually shifted from grinding her leg against my cock to
trying to grind her pussy on my hand.  I pressed my palm against her clit,
giving her something to work with.  The difference in her reactions was
immediate.  She went from being slightly frustrated to happily masturbating
herself on my hand with no discernible delay, making me smile.

   She buried her face in my shoulder and pressed herself against me.  My
hand became sandwiched between us, but I did my best to keep rubbing her
pussy while she got increasingly aggressive with her grinding.  I was
surprised by how horny she was, how much she was letting her desire take
over.  I'd never seen anything like it from her.

   "Feels...  so...  good," Ellie breathed.

   "I can tell.  You know what else would feel good?"

   She slowed down a little and pulled her head back so she could look at
me.  A slow smile spread over her lips.

   "I think I have an idea.  Does that mean you've made up your mind? 
Like, for sure?"

   "As soon as you took your shirt off.  I didn't stand a chance after
that."

   Ellie reluctantly stopped getting herself off on my hand and sank down
to her knees.  Her eyes widened as she saw just how much of a tent I was
making in my underwear.  I could see excitement fill her, replacing any
disappointment she might have felt from leaving the care of my hands.

   She looked up at me seductively as she pulled my underwear down, freeing
my erection.  As soon as I could step out the underwear and kick them off,
she focused on my fully hard cock.  Precum had been leaking from the tip
and she decided to give it a quick lick.  I shivered at the contact, brief
as it was, which only made her smile even wider.

   "You want to put this in me?" she asked in an innocent voice.

   Ellie grasped my shaft lightly and gave it a couple strokes.  I couldn't
take it.  My sister kneeling naked in front of me, toying with my cock, and
looking up at me with the most adorable expression of barely contained
lust...  there was no way I could resist her.

   I grabbed her arms, ignoring her squeals as I manhandled her over to the
bed and threw her onto it.  She giggled as I advanced on her, my cock
pointed directly toward its destination.  She spread her legs for me
eagerly as I crawled on top of her on my hands and knees, getting myself
into position.

   "Yes," I said.  "I do want to put it in you."

   "Even though I'm your sister and we shouldn't?"

   "Mm-hm.  You know we're beyond that."

   "Yeah, I do.  Just wanted to hear you say it."

   I felt Ellie's delicate fingers take hold of my cock and guide me to her
entrance.  She rubbed the head up and down her slit, getting it wet with
her juices.  With a little pressure I'd easily be able to push my way
inside her.

   "I really do love you," I said.  "Sister or not, there's no one I'd
rather be doing this with."

   "Mmm, so do it then."

   I kissed her hard.  She moaned into my mouth as I lowered my hips,
pushing gently until the tip of my cock slipped into her pussy.  She was so
wet that I easily worked my way into her with short, steady thrusts.  Her
hips moved back against me, helping guide me in.

   Pretty soon I bottomed out in her, the length of my shaft buried
entirely inside her pussy.  Every inch of my cock was enveloped inside her.
Her muscles contracted on me arrhythmically, squeezing me tightly.  I
couldn't believe how good it felt just being inside my sister, let alone
how much better it was when I moved.

   I pulled partway out of Ellie, then gently thrust back in.  I
expereienced pure bliss as I increased the intensity of my thrusts.  She
pulled me to her and held me as I made love to her.

   I was acutely aware of every part of my sister's body that was touching
me: her lips on my neck, her hands trailing across my back, her breasts
pressing against my chest.  Every point of contact, even the light brushing
of our tummies, felt sexual.  More importantly, every part of her
articulated the love she felt for me.  It was there in the way she kissed
me, and the way she held me, and the way she had accepted me inside of her.
Ellie gave a low moan of pleasure and arched her neck.  I raised my head
slightly to look at her.  In her eyes I could see all the intensity of the
sensations and emotions she was going through.  I lowered my face back down
and kissed her exposed neck.  I kissed her again and again until she nodded

her head forward and met my mouth with hers.

   Her orgasm rose moments later.  She held me even tighter and her pussy
clamped down on my cock as she came.  I did my best to keep my rhythm
steady; the last thing I wanted was to slow down in the midst of her
pleasure.

   "Oh god, oh god, oh fuck," Ellie whispered, her face contorted in
rapture.

   Her body stiffened and relaxed a few times before she was done.  A look
of contentment replaced the expression of intense pleasure and she melted
back into the mattress, letting go of me and allowing me to continue with
slightly more freedom of movement.

   "Good?" I asked.

   "So good," she said.  "Kinda wish we'd done this sooner."

   "Guess we'll just have to make up for that."

   I increased my pace.  It would have been nice to go on forever, but
eventually the need to cum was too strong.  I could already feel it trying
to take over.

   Ellie was a lot calmer and less involved now that she'd had her release.
She delivered copious kisses to my neck, shoulders, and lips, all as she
ran her hands over my back and arms.

   "You can cum any time you're ready," she whispered into my ear.  "I want
to feel it."

   "God, El.  You know what's gonna happen if you say things like that?"

   "It'll turn you on even more?"

   "Yeah.  That."

   "Maybe that's the idea." She ran her fingernails lightly up my back and
took my earlobe between her teeth for a second before continuing.  "I want
you to cum in me, Neil.  I want you to do it."

   "Fuuuck," I breathed.

   I was so close, and Ellie's encouragement was getting me there even
faster.  She kept whispering to me that she wanted me to finish,
occasionally alternating with nibbling on my ear.  She was driving me
crazy. I needed to cum so badly, and I urgently thrust into her until
finally I was there.

   I kept pumping myself into her as I shot the first of my seed.  She
moaned happily as she felt my cum spurt into her, tangling her fingers in
my hair.  I was overwhelmed with pleasure, unable to focus on anything but
the continuous pulsing of my orgasm and the sensations it sent throughout
my body.  By the time it began to fade, I was completely drained.

   Ellie stroked my cheek and looked directly into my eyes.  Her face held
a glow of satisfaction and love.

   "That was even better than I hoped," she said.  "I was a little worried
it would feel weird, but I should have known better."

   "Well, now we know for sure," I said, giving her a final kiss before
rolling off of her.

   "Mm-hm.  It's a good feeling."

   I lay there beside Ellie, at peace with the world and with myself.  She
was right, it was a good feeling.  If it had turned out that sex with each
other was something we just couldn't handle, it would have been okay.  We
could have dealt with it.  But it didn't turn out that way.  Instead, we
were more compatible than any brother and sister ever should be.  Now I
felt sure that we were doing the right thing for us.

   "El?"

   "Yeah?"

   "One of us needs to turn the light off."

   She looked over at the light switch.

   "But whoever does it is gonna have to get out of bed."

   "I know."

   "But...  I don't wanna.  M'so comfy right here."

   "Please?"

   She looked at the switch again, then sighed heavily.

   "You owe me," she said.

   Ellie rolled ungracefully off the side of the bed, almost falling over
as she stood up.  I got to watch her naked body as she made the short trip
to the light switch.  The slight swaying of her butt was hypnotizing, even
in my satiated state.  She caught me staring just before she flicked off
the light and walked back toward the bed.

   "You just wanted to check me out again," she accused me.

   "That was just a happy coincidence, I assure you."

   I pulled her to me as she tried to crawl under the covers.  She squealed
and giggled as she tried to pull the blanket up over us while getting no
help from me.  I held her and waited, and she eventually settled in and put
her arm around me in return.  I was fully ready for sleep, even though part
of me would have liked to lie there and cuddle with my sister all night.

   "Guess Lily was right," Ellie said.

   "She was," I agreed while stifling a yawn.

   "At least we know she won't freak out if she finds out."

   "Mm-hm."

   "And you don't really care, do you?"

   "Not right now.  Try me again tomorrow."

   "Mmm, okay.  Good night, Neil."

   "Night, El."

   ****

   I hated having to get up the next day.  That particular morning, more so
than any other I could remember, I just wanted to stay in bed forever. 
Ellie couldn't have agreed more.  Sadly, neither of us was enough of a
slacker to pull that off.

   The upside to getting out of bed was that I got to see Ellie naked
again, even if only briefly.  She purposefully took a moment to brush out
her hair a little with her fingers, giving me a chance to stare, before
throwing on one of my shirts.  I had a partial erection by the time she
gave me a quick kiss and slipped out the door.

   Soon after that I discovered an unexpected side effect to our previous
night's activity.  Once we both made it to the kitchen, we found ourselves
unable to stop smiling at each other.  I did my best to maintain a neutral
expression, but every time I looked at her I felt a goofy grin break out on
my face.  I couldn't help it.

   The way Ellie and I were looking at each other didn't go unnoticed by
the rest of the family.  One by one, Mom, Lily, and Alice all realized
something was up, and it didn't take them long to come to their own
conclusions as to what it was.

   Lily was the first to catch on, but she didn't do much other than roll
her eyes at us.  She'd known what was coming before any of us, so it wasn't
much of a surprise.  Mom was the first to speak.

   "Alright, what's going on?" Mom asked.  "Lily, why do you keep glaring
at your brother?  And Neil, why are...." She stopped in mid-sentence.  She
looked back and forth between Ellie and me, occasionally glancing over to
Lily, then shut her mouth and shook her head in exasperation.  "You know
what?  Maybe I don't want to know."

   "Probably not," Lily said.

   Mom stood up from the table.  "Neil, I left a grocery list on the
counter, can--"

   "I'll take care of it," I said.

   "Thank you.  You all have a good day, I'll see you tonight."

   She left the room, pausing just long enough to kiss the top of Alice's
head on her way by.  Alice smiled like she was the favourite now, though I
was pretty sure it had more to do with her being closest to the doorway. 
We all chorused goodbyes and waited until the front door closed behind her.

   "You guys have no idea what 'subtle' means, do you?" Lily burst out the
first chance she got.

   "I have no idea what you're talking about," I said while Ellie nodded in
agreement.

   "Whatever.  At least Mom took it well, all things considered.  I would
have had to be the one to smooth things out otherwise, thanks to you guys.
And it's a sad day when I've gotta be the responsible one around here."

   Lily got up and took her empty cereal bowl over to the sink.  Just
before she left, Ellie spoke up.

   "Thanks, Lil," Ellie said.  "You're a good sister."

   Lily shrugged uncomfortably at the unexpected praise and kept walking. I
thought about saying something to her before she was out of earshot, but
decided not to.  I didn't really have anything to add.

   That just left Alice who had yet to show any real reaction.  I tried to
keep an quiet eye on her, and as far as I could tell Ellie was doing the
same.

   "So are you guys in love or something?" Alice finally asked.

   For all the concern she showed, she might as well have been asking about
the weather.  Ellie and I glanced at each other before speaking.

   "Kind of?" I said.

   "It's complicated," Ellie added.  "But...  yes."

   I felt another grin breaking out and tried to fight it.  Just as before,
I failed miserably.

   "Okay," Alice said, as though that was the answer she'd expected.

   She followed Lily's example and dropped her dishes in the sink before
heading to her room.  Unlike her sister, she seemed in a much cheerier
mood. As far as I could tell, she was entirely unfazed by the events of the
morning.  If not for her question, I might have suspected that she hadn't
noticed anything was different.

   "So," I said once Ellie and I were alone.  "Alice seems fine with
things."

   "Mm-hm," Ellie agreed.  "I think she'll be alright.  Lily will be too,
even if she wants to pretend like it's a big ordeal for her."

   "What about Mom?  She didn't really give us much of a reaction one way
or the other."

   "I think she'll probably be okay with it.  She didn't freak out on us,
so that's a good sign."

   "Yeah, but...  do you think she actually knows what we did, or does she
just suspect?"

   "Doesn't matter.  Suspecting'd be almost as bad in this case.  Trust me,
she'll be fine.  It might take her some time to adjust is all."

   "You're probably right." I leaned over and kissed her.  Given that our
secret was more or less out, I wasn't worried about being caught anymore.
"I love you."

   "Mmm, me too," she said, and then her face took on an air of mischief.
"Listen, if we're done worrying about our family for now, you maybe wanna
head upstairs and take a shower together before class?"

   "Hmm..." I said, pretending to consider it for a moment, that grin
fighting its way back onto my face.  We were lucky, so very lucky.  It was
freeing that we didn't have to hide anymore.

   Ellie took my hand, and I let her drag me upstairs.  The things we'd
done the night before were still fresh in my mind, and I was eager to add
to those memories.


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