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 *~*~*~*~* YOUR BASIC DISCLAIMER

   This story is a work of fiction intended for ADULTS ONLY.  It may not be
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quickturn5@yahoo.com.

   Please remember that this is just a story, and not reality.  Doing some
of the things described in this story could result in very serious
consequences.  Be smart and be safe.  *~*~*~*~*



   THE QUESTION by Brian Carlisle



   Debbie and I drove out to the hills one Saturday afternoon, like we do
from time to time.  We usually just sit and talk on the hood of my van,
like the friends we are.  It's relaxing out there.  Nice.  Peaceful. 
Usually, that is.



   We had been silent the entire drive up from town.  A Zep song on the
radio jammed in the background, but I wasn't into it.  Wasn't in the mood,
I guess.  Only when I cut the engine and we jumped up on the hood did
either of us actually break the ice.  Deb went first.



   "So what happened between you two, anyway?"



   Taking a deep breath, I searched myself for the answer.  The truth was
that I didn't really know for sure myself.  The way things had ended
between us, "Why?" was left unanswered, leaving me searching for reasons
unknown like a blind man in a fog.  Of course in the end, it didn't really
matter.  What was, was - and what I'd dreamed could never be.  But that
didn't keep me from asking anyway.



   I gazed into infinity as I began to speak.



   "We grew apart, I guess.  Sort of the same way that a lot of people do.
But it wasn't like that - not exactly, anyway.  I still loved her at the
end."



   I paused and turned away to look off at the cliffs in the distance.  The
haze of dusk rolled off their jagged edges, shadows popping out here and
there.



   "Just - she didn't love *me*.  So I guess you could say that she grew
apart from me over time." I shrugged.  "It probably happens more often than
you'd think.  What're you going to do?  You know?"



   Debbie nodded sympathetically as we lapsed into a long silence.  I could
tell she knew exactly what she wanted to say - and yet, she held it in. 
Her face showed something intangible, but very real; a pain, buried deep
inside.  I knew what she wanted, but I just couldn't give it to her.  Not
now, anyway.



   I spoke without looking at her.



   "Why does it hurt so bad, Deb?"



   Out of the corner of my eye, I could see her face, a transparent mask
that covered nothing.  She smiled thinly, though I could tell that her
heart wasn't in it.



   "Because you loved her, stupid."



   "Yeah.  I know," I said plainly.  "And I guess some part of me always
will."



   Suddenly, Debbie jumped off the hood and turned away from me.



   "Damn you," she said quietly.  "I know you're right, but damn you
anyway."



   I looked at her sadly, then off into the distance again.  Deb sighed and
turned, glancing sidelong toward the inside of my van.  I knew what she
wanted.



   "Want to go fuck?" I asked.



   "Yeah, sure."



   So we did.




   *~*~* Questions?  Feedback?  E-mail me at quickturn5@yahoo.com *~*~*