THE GENTLEMEN'S CLUB TJ Written by Lady Poetess egiggles at moose-mail.com /~bbp Please do not reproduce on any website without permission. This story has no resemblance to anyone dead or alive. ONE TJ Hoban wasn't fond of any institution of education. His own schooldays he tried not to think of too often - there was a reason why he dropped out of school too early. More than one reasons, really, and in retrospective, reasons he admitted were juvenile and actually superficial. Yes, he was mostly to blame for his aborted education. But admitting his weakness and actually stepping foot into a school were two different things altogether. Chilton High was an exclusive - and expensive - private school, however, and for the sake of his son, he would be nice, put on his best manners, and talk to Johnny's teacher. Johnny was a gifted boy, everything his stupid, useless father wasn't, and TJ wouldn't screw this up for his boy. Hence, here he was, dashing down the hallway of the school. He was five minutes late for the parents-teacher meeting, thanks to the confusing directions and the labyrinthine nature of this place. Jesus, he thought, this wasn't a school, it was like the entire White House or something. There - there was the fucking conference room. TJ paused before a portrait of some stuffy old bastard and tried to see his reflection. His hair was probably askew in his dashing here. Oh well. He straightened his collar, checked that he didn't miss any button and that his zip was fully closed, and then, taking a deep breath, opened the door. He hoped the teacher wouldn't resemble any, or fucking hell, was one of his old teachers. Robert Scott Speedman was trying his best to bite his tongue and not yell at the parents in the conference room. The exams were around the corner, so naturally these parents couldn't stop talking and asking him about it. He jokingly let on that maybe they should bribe the boy at the printer's for copies of the paper, and one man actually asked him in all seriousness, "What sort of car does he prefer?" He didn't like them at all. They reminded him of his parents, the two over-demanding creatures (he didn't like using expletives) that made his life a living hell when he was younger. No wonder their children always came to him, Speedy, for advice and sometimes just to chat. They sensed that he understood what they were going through. He was, more than a decade ago, one of them. Blanking out the parents, nodding occasionally to someone yakking him up, his thoughts wandered to his current love life. He didn't have one. His boyfriend of three years called it quits because he had decided that the arrogant prick, pardon, the fucking intellectual he met at an international conference was a more satisfactory partner than Speedy, a mere history teacher. All he needed now, he decided, was someone big, dumb, hung, and silent for long, hot sex sessions. Trouble was, he didn't exactly know how to find one. He had heard of bikers and mechanics and sailors that might meet these requirements, but he had no idea how he would actually find one. Hanging around seedy pick-up joints gave him the chills. He liked things quiet and clean. But he doubted he would find meat in a bookstore the way he met that cheating prick Aaron three years ago. The bang of door against wall shattered his reverie. He steadied the cup of awful coffee in his hand and looked at the visitor. And looked. And looked. Wow, he thought. The newcomer was a young man, probably in his late twenties, and to say that he looked out of place was an understatement. Was that dark ocher shirt and those tight jeans his best clothes? Everyone else was clad formal, and as Speedy watched, the stranger actually flushed red under his dark, tanned skin. The man's face was typical Italian bad boy personified, complete with beautiful brown eyes and Elvis-like sideburns. And as the man uncomfortably rolled up one sleeve, revealing tanned muscular arms, Speedy wondered if the man was tanned. everywhere. The everywhere thought prompted Speedy's eyes to zone in. there. He couldn't help it. But he didn't regret his indiscretion one bit as he swallowed at the sight of the tight and promising package. This was his bad boy. His wish came true. Who said there wasn't a God? Hallelujah. "Hi. I'm Robert Speedman, but everyone calls me Speedy. And you are.?" Speedy managed to find his voice. It wasn't easy. "Tomas Hoban. Call me TJ. I'm Johnny's father." Speedy's mouth fell open in surprise. It was one am and everyone had gone home. Speedy walked alongside TJ along the school grounds. He was trying to overcome his disappointment that this hunk was straight. Speedy was also trying to keep breathing because this hunk was walking beside him, so close that if Speedy chose, he could lean over slightly to the left and rest against that muscular arm of TJ's. It looked like a dependable arm, attached to broad shoulders that attested to TJ's job as a construction work supervisor (he told Speedy earlier). In the dark, the harsh beauty of TJ's face was made ethereal from the streetlights. "I don't understand how." Speedy hesitated. "How I have a fifteen year old son?" TJ shrugged. "I started early. Too early. I'm not proud of that. Johnny became another extra mouth for my parents to feed. But he was the best thing that happened to me. Taught me to be responsible." Speedy couldn't help doing the math. TJ was twenty-seven years old. He fathered a son when he was twelve. Wow. "I dropped out of school to work - and I hated school anyway." TJ shrugged. He did that a lot, Speedy noticed, as if TJ was uncomfortable talking. "And now I'm trying to tell Johnny not to end up like me." "He's a smart boy. He's doing really well, from what I hear. I know his history is excellent." "He always comes home late." "That's because he's at the library," Speedy told the man gently. "He reads a lot. He's ahead of many others in the class when it comes to my reading assignment list." "That's great. As long as he doesn't end up like me." "Oh come on. You didn't do too badly, I'm sure," Speedy remarked. The night was chilly, and he buried his hands into his pockets. "Yeah? I guess. But that doesn't make me any better. I can't help Johnny with his homework. The other day, we were watching `Who Wants To Be A Millionaire' together, and my boy could answer much better than the morons playing. I'm proud of him, but. I'm also quite ashamed that I didn't know jack shit - sorry about my language." "Hey, quit putting yourself down," Speedy said. "Or I'll go home now." He didn't know why he said that. But to his delight, TJ frowned and shook his head. "Okay, I'll stop," the man said. He didn't seem eloquent to Speedy, and again Speedy cursed the fact that TJ was straight. TJ was Mr Right for a short-term fuck. "I like talking to you," TJ said. "I mean. never mind." "Anyway, thanks," Speedy told the man reassuringly. "It's late. I think I'd better get back. I have papers to grade and - " "Okay." TJ smiled, looking like a lonely, forlorn, and befuddled but very handsome man. "Speedy, uh, can I." Speedy turned, hoping. "Yeah?" "Thanks." TJ said. "For the talk. And the walk. Oh, and telling me about Johnny's excellent progress. Sometimes I wonder how he could be my boy." "What happened to the mother?" Speedy asked. "Sorry, that's a personal question." "No, it's okay. She didn't want the baby. She was only fifteen then. But my parents intervened and told her that they - and I - would raise the kid. I didn't know what happened to her. She moved after delivering the boy, and I never saw her again." "Sorry." "No. It's not a grand love affair. Just two stupid kids experimenting and getting it all wrong. I happened to develop faster than kids my age back then." That Speedy could imagine. TJ, even now, exuded virility, raw primal virility. Speedy's cock was bursting in his pants, he badly wanted to pounce on TJ and rip the man's clothes off. Nah, he shouldn't. He was a nice guy. He was also horny, hard up, and needy. "Look, I really have to go," Speedy mumbled. Best retreat, for there was no way he could win in this situation. He would go home, take a hot soak in the bathtub, and jerk off until his balls ache. Yeah, that was what he would do. "Bye," TJ said simply, standing there in the garden with his hands shoved into his pockets. He sounded lost and miserable that Speedy wished he could be the one to offer comfort. Speedy, however, was never a masochist and he didn't want to be one of those reverse fag hags who suffered in silent staying close to the straight guys they wanted badly. He was a smart man. He beat the hell out of there. TWO Johnny was asleep at his study table. TJ, watching his son, again felt the heavy burden of the realization of his own inability to make Johnny's life any easier. According to Speedy, frail and shy Johnny was bullied in school, although the school counselor was trying to help him overcome his self-esteem problem. As he gently shook his son awake, it ate at him, this realization that he was a useless father that couldn't do jack shit for his son. "TJ?" Even at fifteen, Johnny still wasn't used to the idea that TJ was his father. Not that TJ blamed him - he told Johnny only when his grandparents died and TJ had no choice but to let the truth be out in the open. "Come on, buddy, time to bed." TJ playfully tickled at the boy, who shoved him away, irritated. "It's three in the morning. You have to get to school tomorrow." "Okay." TJ wished Johnny would be a livelier person. He himself was a physical fellow, a typical jock who played anything and everything. His son was so different from him, and he just couldn't understand it. He lifted Johnny into his arms, and the boy laughed weakly as TJ carried him into the bedroom. After tucking the boy to sleep, TJ retreated to his own bedroom and brooded. Okay, he admitted that he wasn't a smart man. He wasn't even average in the intelligence department. He was good with his hands, but when it came to thinking, well. he was stuck. People tended to think of him as a dumb brute, and he had no problems with that - he knew he was dumb. This was the reason why he worked hard to build his body: he was lucky enough to inherit his father's looks, and brawn was the only asset he had now. He occasionally modeled for fitness magazines in between construction stints, but now that he had found a stable employment with an up- and-coming firm, he could spend more time with Johnny. Which wasn't what he expected. He expected things to be like his own father and he, but Johnny and he were too different. Johnny said things TJ couldn't catch, and TJ couldn't say anything that Johnny found interesting. They usually ended up watching TV in awkward silence. But like he told Johnny, they had only each other in this world now, and they had to take care of each other. He wondered if Johnny had a girlfriend. Thinking back about his own younger days - hard to imagined it was only slightly more than ten years ago - and his incessant screwing, he could testify at how good sex was at distracting one from life's problems. When he was fucking, he didn't feel stupid. He felt like the most powerful man alive. There were some close calls after Amelia was pregnant with Johnny, and TJ's father had to knock some sense literally into TJ before TJ started using rubber in his fucking. TJ had ten siblings and apparently he had inherited some over hyperactive sperm from his father. Again, not a good thing. There wasn't many good things in TJ's life, really. TJ sighed and pulled his sheets over his nude form. He couldn't sleep however. As he turned over onto his stomach and looked at the phone at his bedside table, he hesitated. Okay, he admitted to himself - he was thinking of Johnny's handsome history teacher. He liked that man. Speedy was smart, intelligent, and he actually talked to and listened to TJ, man to man, like two equals. Most people tried to escape his company after meeting him for two minutes tops. Okay, Speedy was good looking too. Clean-cut all- American wholesome looks that could be used to sell patriotism, like they said. Brilliant blue eyes and beautifully formed dimples framing a smile that was simultaneously seductive and reassuring - pure poetry in beauty. TJ turned in his bed and absently rubbed the inside of his right thigh. Speedy was. beautiful. And - TJ closed his eyes and his hand rubbed his heavy ball sac now - so beautiful. perfect. TJ cursed, removed his hand from his balls, and reached for the phone. "I can't stop thinking about you." Speedy almost dropped the phone in his hands. "TJ?" "Yeah. Hope you don't mind. It's late and I got your number from the operator, but I have to talk to you. I really enjoyed myself talking to you - it's stupid, I know, but I'd really like to see you some more." TJ paused for breath after his unusual speech outburst. "I hope you don't mind me saying this. I mean, if you're offended that I ask to see you or anything." Speedy overcame his surprise. "No, no, TJ. You've asked the right guy. If you're a woman, I'd have to let you down easy." "You're gay?" "Yes, I'm gay," Speedy confirmed. "Great! I won't turn you down if you're a woman though," TJ said. Speedy grinned. "I can guess." "Can I see you now?" "Now?" Speedy looked out the window of his apartment. Sure enough, someone - TJ? - was at the phone booth just outside his apartment block. "TJ? That you in the phone booth?" "Yeah. Can I come up?" "Sure," Speedy said, hastily kicking off his sheets. He had to tidy up his hair. Cologne - cologne on his armpits and maybe even between his legs. And. and. shit! "Give me a minute." "No, don't bother if you're too busy or something." "No! I'm not busy! I'm just. shit." Speedy laughed at the absurdity of it all. He had never been this flustered in his life before. "I need time to freshen up and look good." "It's almost four in the morning." Oh yeah. Speedy closed his eyes and hit his forehead gently against the wall. "Okay. Come up. But don't blame me if I terrify you." "Okay, I won't," TJ said. That guy apparently took everything literally, Speedy thought. Kicking into action, he dashed for the bathroom. TJ was smiling that crooked, goofy grin of his when Speedy opened the door. Speedy wiped that smile soon enough by grabbing the man's shirt collar and pulling the man down for a hard kiss. Speedy didn't want to bust this one up, and he gave it his all - his tongue and his willing surrender when TJ tightened his embrace on Speedy and kissed back. They broke the kiss when Speedy gasped the moment he hit the floor with a painful thud. TJ growled playfully and attacked Speedy's neck, tickling the man into laughter with his nibbling kisses even as he teased the man's skin to chilling goose bumps with his lips. Speedy impatiently pushed his hands into the waistband of TJ's jeans, making little mews of need until TJ laughed and reached down for Speedy's shorts. Speedy heard the rasp of the zipper, but the sudden penetration caught him off-guard that he let out an unwitting "Wow-eeee!" cry of surprise and delight. TJ's hips flexed, and that very thick, very long penis forged deeper up Speedy's definitely ill-prepared-to-accommodate-its-size anus. Speedy spread his legs wide, clasping them around TJ's waist, as if that would allow his anus to loosen up. Speedy burrowed his hand up TJ's shirt to clasp the man's shoulders and to tease his nipples even as he threw his head back when TJ pumped his hips forth again - driving another throbbing inch up Speedy's convulsing asshole. Speedy was too small, too tight for that cock, but TJ was slowly getting in, lubricated by his own copious fuck juice and Speedy's anal mucus. inch by excruciating inch, each inch making them both cry out in ecstasy as tight heated walls clamped hard on sensitive cock flesh. until with an impatient cry and a hoarse "I'm sorry, Speedy!" TJ ruthlessly drives the last few inches through Speedy's ass. Speedy screamed in pain as much as pleasure as TJ tore him open, penetrating him so deep and in such an intimate depth that sent convulsions of pleasure surging up Speedy's spine. Speedy gave a hiss of pleasure as TJ's cock moved against his prostate gland, his back arching instinctively until his buttocks almost lifted up the floor. "That's it. Try to push me off," TJ hoarsely ordered. His hips moved, ramming his hips to Speedy's in a loud, wet slap of feverish flesh until his cock pubic hair tangled with the thick furs of Speedy's anal gash. And Speedy pushed. He gave a wild cry and banged his hips up, trying to push TJ. The motion only caused TJ to spear him deeper with that thick cock as the man pumped his cock into Speedy at the same time. Speedy's fingers were claws on TJ's shoulder, urging him on, until with an impatient growl TJ lifted one hand off the floor and pulled his T-shirt off fluidly. Then Speedy's mouth lifted to latch itself to TJ's left nipple. As he sucked and teased the throbbing male bud, his hips galvanized in a frenzied rhythm to meet TJ's increasingly savage pumping hips. His prostate gland was on fire, his anus was burning and threatening to give, and his senses were ablaze. He clamped tight on that cock, teasing it with his anal muscles, clasping the cock so that his anal ridge clamped at the sensitive ridge of TJ's cock crown at each withdrawal of that cock. And TJ approved, oh yes, he approved. Sweat fell down his hair and forehead onto Speedy's face as they fucked in mindless, instinctive flesh-slapping-flesh rhythm. Then TJ gave a roar, and his fertile semen exploded from his cock, gushing forth in powerful spurts to sear and brand Speedy's insides as his. Speedy fell back, his own orgasm wracking him insensate, his eyes closed and his breathing harsh and uneven as TJ fell onto him, the man equally drained by his orgasm. THREE They went shopping that Saturday. Johnny was at the library, as usual, and hence TJ had the chance to be alone with Speedy. He knocked on Speedy's door at two in the afternoon as soon as he finished his half-day shift, and shyly offered the man a stalk of rose he bought from a florist on his way here. The smile on Speedy's face was reward enough. They hadn't actually had time to meet, much less fuck, since their first night together. It went unspoken between them that TJ wasn't comfortable with Johnny knowing about this affair and Speedy didn't.well, he wasn't sure what he wanted or didn't want yet. But they wanted today. Today was theirs. Speedy shrugged agreeably when TJ suggested that they stopped by the local downtown mart for some groceries. For a moment, TJ was afraid that Speedy would find this locale too cheap, and he kicked himself for even bringing up a matter that would remind Speedy how inferior TJ was as a human being. In fact, he regretted even suggesting that they shopped, because Speedy would then find out how desperately TJ was trying to budget and. "Hey, relax," Speedy said, reaching up absently to arrange TJ's collar, even though there was nothing wrong with the collar. "You look tense. You feel tense." He tapped those shoulders and felt the muscle move under the fabric. Nice. "What's wrong?" "Trying to figure out how to spend $50 wisely," TJ admitted. "Hey, just ask and I'll chip in a share," Speedy offered. "Why not?" he asked when he saw TJ's face. "It won't be charity. One day I'll expect you to cook me something." "Really?" TJ didn't dare to breathe. "You and me? Dinner?" "Yeah. Someday." Speedy took two large jars of peanut butter, expensive ones, and placed them into TJ's trolley. "Hey, my treat." "I don't think - " "And I always love these cookies," Speedy said, tossing an extra- large bag into the trolley. "And some ice cream. Let's get some ice cream, get back to your place, and enjoy them." "Okay." TJ gave up. He couldn't say no to this guy, he realized. Not when Speedy was being so nice and kind to him. "My place. Ice cream." "You got Mozart in your house?" "I don't hang paintings in the house," TJ told the man. At Speedy's grin, he frowned. He said something stupid again, he knew. "What?" he demanded. Now, he knew, would be where Speedy would shrug and say nothing, making TJ feel condescended upon. "Mozart's a classical composer. You know, pianos, some opera pieces. maybe you can borrow my CD and give it a spin." TJ let loose his breath. He decided that he was starting to fall in love with this guy. "Okay," he said. His steps were lighter and he felt, with Speedy by his side, that he was walking on air. FOUR "Johnny?" TJ sat down opposite his son two across the dinner table two weeks later. "Can I ask you something?" Johnny looked up, the uncertainty on his face making TJ's own resolution waver. "Yeah, TJ?" "I promised you there will be no more secrets between us." TJ hesitated. "Okay, I'm in love with your history teacher." "Speedy?" TJ looked up from his breakfast. "Say something," TJ asked after the silence dragged too long for his liking. "What do you want me to say?" Johnny offered. His voice, like his face, was always inscrutable to TJ. What was he feeling, TJ never would never know, and that hurt him the most. "He could lose his job," Johnny finally said. "It's against school policy to, uh, date the parents of the students." "I know. Maybe we can keep this quiet until your term is over, and then." Then what? TJ wished he knew. "Johnny, I just want to know if you are okay with this." "If I'm not okay with this, will you stop seeing him?" "Yeah," TJ said. "You come first, Johnny. Always." Johnny shrugged. "Speedy's okay," was all he said before he continued reading the papers as he finished his breakfast. TJ looked at his son, frustrated at their inability to carry a decent conversation. Then again, he and his own father weren't exactly the Brady bunch either, but damn it, TJ had vowed never to be like his father. Speedy was a smart guy, and his son liked Speedy, TJ thought optimistically. Maybe between them both, who would no doubt had lots more to speak about, would help him create a family he had always wanted. A family that was, he didn't know, maybe like those happy families he saw on TV. Speedy was smart - he would solve everything. Brightened by his buoyant hopes, he attacked his own breakfast. Alan Gelfant removed the hundred dollar notes from the ATM and handed them to TJ, his employee. "Here you go," he said unnecessarily. TJ took the money and shoved them clumsily into his jeans pocket. He had asked Alan if he could get his paycheck a bit earlier than usual. Alan didn't ask why, he was a great employer in that way. TJ didn't tell him that tomorrow was he and Speedy's first month anniversary and he wanted. hell, he wanted to be romantic and all. "You'll need to get a ring," Alan said, surprising TJ. "What? You're going to propose to someone right? You come in here every day for the last few weeks smiling like a tomcat and now you suddenly want money. You're either getting something expensive for her or you are planning to leave the company." "He," TJ corrected. "Know anywhere I can get a good deal?" Alan raised a brow in surprise. He'd always thought TJ was straight. Women swarmed to that man like cats to cream. Okay, so did gay men too, but only two months ago Alan knew TJ had screwed an associate's wife. It wasn't TJ's fault - the man didn't know whom the woman that came on to him aggressively was, but Alan had a headache still remembering the damage he had to repair. Now TJ wanted to settle down with a guy. Hmm. "One month is a bit fast," he murmured. "I don't know. We are so good together, and my son likes him." Alan stopped himself from chuckling. TJ looked serious, dead serious, and that was a rather comical sight. Okay, TJ wasn't the smartest bulb in town, but he was reliable and a decent sort. He just looked funny with his forehead screwed up like that whenever he was trying to think. "I'm happy for you," Alan said honestly. "Good for you. Who's he?" "My son's teacher. He may lose his job, so I thought maybe I would get an engagement ring instead, you know, maybe we'll wait and keep it low until my son passes his exams and move on to the next class." Oh God, trust TJ to fall into someone way out of his league. A teacher? This got better and better. "Does he know about this?" Alan asked quietly. "You wanting this?" Remembering how people in need of quick, uncomplicated fucks tended to throw themselves at unsuspecting TJ, it was an expected question. "It's a surprise," TJ told him, his look one of `What the fuck are you doing asking such stupid questions for?' Alan sighed. Okay, so maybe he should give the other man the benefit of the doubt, but really, all signs seemed pointing towards disaster. A schoolteacher of an exclusive school for gifted kids. and TJ? One that seemed happy to keep things quiet, maybe because he would lose his job if things got out? Someone Alan doubted that this teacher would choose TJ over his high- paying job. More likely like all those people that got to TJ first, this man just wanted a quick, simple fuck with a big, dark, hung brute who was too oblivious to ask any questions. Oh boy. "Well, Brendan" - the man Alan was sleeping with - "knew someone called Phoenix whom, I'm sure, would give you a decent bargain if you drop the name Brendan Fraser. Here, I'll give you his address." Speedy lay back on the bed, unable to think of anything but "Wow!" His body was still tingling pleasantly in the aftermaths of one of the most powerful orgasms he'd ever experienced. Admittedly, he had very few lovers in his life, preferring the monogamous, long- term style of life instead of playing the field, but even he knew this was special. TJ's cock flexed in its buried warmth deep within Speedy's ass. The man still had it in him for another round, judging from the steely hardness of that cock fast coming into full tumescence as it stretched the muscular walls of Speedy's anal passage. "Wait until I get my breathing back to normal, please," Speedy told the man as TJ started to drop light kisses along Speedy's neck. "Okay," TJ said between hungry kisses. "And I have something to give you." One of his hand reached for the bedside table. Something fell to the floor with a thud. Frustrated, TJ gave an impatient growl and lifted his body to grab a small box at the table top - Speedy yelped as TJ's motion caused the man's cock to plunge another inch or so deeper into the man. All thoughts of hot sex fled from Speedy's mind as he stared at the small box TJ placed on his chest. This couldn't be. "Go ahead, open it," TJ said, almost shyly. Like a man in denial of his fate, Speedy opened it. "A ring," he said stupidly. A ring, a simple ring that still must had caused TJ a fortune. "When you are no longer Johnny's teacher, will you marry me?" TJ asked softly. "No!" the answer came out before Speedy could withdraw it. "I mean. damn it, I could lose my job over this." "But, we can wait until Johnny moves on. It's only a few months more until the next term, right?" "I. I never expected things to go this far." Wrong thing to say, judging from the way TJ's eyes chilled. With a careless yank of his cock out of Speedy - ouch - he rolled off the man. "What do you mean?" TJ asked. "Nothing. I just - " TJ took Speedy's chin in his hand and made the man looked at him. And from Speedy's look, he knew. "You just wanted the sex," TJ said, pain warring with incredulity. "You're just like the rest." "No, TJ!" Speedy protested. "It's not like that." "Then tell me. Tell this stupid fool what it is actually like." Speedy didn't what to say. TJ was right, after all. He just wanted an easy, uncomplicated rebound sexual relationship with a not-too- bright man. TJ fit the bill. But now, facing the demise of this relationship, Speedy found it too painful to even contemplate. "I like you, TJ," Speedy tried to explain. "But I haven't thought about this." he gestured at the ring on the bed. "It's too soon." TJ started to stand. "Yes, I started out wanting a quick fuck with a dumb hung brute!" Speedy yelled. "Lower your voice," TJ snapped. "I don't want Johnny to hear us fight." "Then listen to me." "I don't have to. I don't listen to people who call me dumb and hung." "I will shout and scream if you walk out of the room." TJ eyed Speedy angrily, defiantly, but he reluctantly stood his ground. "Speak. And leave." Damn, it hurt. It hurt so bad, worse than when the others left because he had thought Speedy different. He talked to Speedy, and Speedy and he had something going. Or so he thought. He was the biggest fool of them all. "You're not stupid," Speedy said. "Okay, I won't lie and say you are a genius, but you are not stupid. And you're different. I don't know. I like being with you, I like talking to you, and I want to sleep with you. So yes, maybe, if you give me time, I would have said yes to your proposal, TJ. You caught me by surprise. And I'm guilty of thinking the worst of you when we started sleeping and going out together. But no longer. I'm sorry, okay?" "You hurt me," TJ said, sitting back down the bed. "I told you so many things, about how that woman who screwed me just to get pregnant when her husband couldn't give her a child, and all those people who just wanted my cock. And you told me about how your parents are strict and cold and. I thought we understand each other and know what it's like to be lonely." Speedy touched TJ hesitantly, but TJ didn't flinch or pull again, hence he placed his arms around TJ's shoulders and pulled the man down beside him. TJ didn't fight. He lay down and looked at Speedy, outwardly cold and still angry, but his eyes were hopeful, beseeching Speedy to tell him that hey, Speedy was wrong, and he would make up for his mistake. And Speedy knew he was wrong, and maybe he would make up for his mistake. "I need time," Speedy said simply. "Okay," TJ said. "Take anything you need. My time, my soul, and my life - I don't care. Just stay with me. Please." Speedy tried to smile, but couldn't. His heart was pounding so thunderously, he couldn't hear anything beyond the pounding of his heart. But he could hear TJ all too clearly. "Okay," he said finally. "But this scares me, TJ. The uncertainty - what if you just wake up one day and stop wanting this anymore? What if I feel that way myself? What - " "What day is today?" That made Speedy pause. "It was Monday twenty minutes ago. Now it's Tuesday," he said, giving the clock at the bedside table a brief glance. "Okay. I'll ask you every Tuesday to marry me. Take your time. I'll wait. But that doesn't mean I'll stop asking," TJ said. "And as for me or you stop feeling this one day, I can't just lie and say things will be okay. It won't. We'll fight, we'll have bad habits that would irritate each other, but I don't know. I know I want this, and I am certain I really, really want this. I won't stop wanting something this badly once I start. And I'd rather you say yes because you are sure too, not because I make you feel compelled to say yes. Am I making sense here?" "Yeah," Speedy said. "Thanks, TJ." TJ kissed Speedy lightly on the nose. "Take all the time you want. I'm always here." Speedy nodded. "As am I," he answered. He wanted to say more, but TJ's arms tightened around him as they kissed, and his words were lost in his subsequent moans of ecstasy. FIVE Speedy watched from the door as Johnny walked to his father. He saw TJ's questioning lift of an eyebrow - fuck, it was a crime for a man to be that handsome - and Johnny's shrug. He saw TJ's grin when Johnny told his father that he had aced his exam and was in the class top ten. Then TJ was lifting his son and swinging him around as if the boy was still eight and not the sixteen-year-old young man he was. Sometimes TJ was more the young brat around the house than Johnny. Speedy sighed - not that he was angry or vexed, he just sighed because he was charmed at the father-son interaction - and stepped out of the doorway. TJ saw him first, as always. "Hey Speedy, our son aced his exams. Woo-hoo!" Speedy still couldn't fight his instinctive wince whenever TJ called Johnny their son. Damn it, he wasn't exactly ready to be called a parent yet. So he was, but he just wasn't ready to hear it yet. One year after living with TJ and son, there were still little adjustments here and there, such as TJ's conservative approach to family that actually endeared him to Speedy's equally conservative parents. Not that those old bastards would admit that. "Thanks to you," Johnny said shyly. He too winced whenever TJ talked about them three as one happy family. Speedy and Johnny bonded over that. No daddy-son stuff for them, just plain Scott and Johnny. But other than that, Johnny didn't show much concern over his father sleeping with his now ex-history teacher. He seemed glad to have Speedy around the house, in fact, because Speedy was like him more than his own father ever could be. "Uhm, okay." Speedy was never good at the open display of emotions in the Hoban household too. But he liked that. He would learn to be like TJ, maybe. "Come on, let's go and have a great lunch," TJ said. To Speedy who walked alongside him as Johnny walked ahead to get the car (Johnny was starting to monopolize the car), he said, "Life's good." "Really, huh?" Speedy asked back. "Yup. Two of my favorite, most precious men with me. Can't be happier." TJ grinned his always-goofy grin. Speedy took his hand. "Old sap," he said gently. "But you adore me," TJ said. Speedy nodded. Then a thought struck him and made him stop on his tracks. Today was Tuesday. TJ always asked him to marry him on Tuesdays. It was almost one in the afternoon. Damn it, suddenly furious with TJ for forgetting, Speedy hastened towards the car. How could the man forget? It was their ritual: every Tuesday morning TJ would get down on one knee and ask Speedy to wear his ring. Speedy was furious - no, he was also, at this moment, terrified that TJ had decided maybe Speedy wasn't worth the bother. Maybe Speedy had pushed him too far, and he decided this morning that what the fuck, might as well do things Speedy's way, and live with an escape clause always dangling in the wings. Speedy didn't bother to think any more. Later, he would realize that somehow, in those months living with TJ and Johnny, he had forgotten why he was so afraid of the uncertainty. He wasn't uncertain anymore, because he trusted TJ now. And TJ's weekly Tuesday proposal, which Speedy used to take as a playful gesture, had something become more than a playful tease to Speedy, it had become TJ's promise to Speedy that he still wanted Speedy. TJ was old-fashioned. He'd told Speedy he didn't believe in divorces and if Speedy and he worked this out because they wanted the same thing - a life together, he would do his best that they never break up. Speedy had thought then that TJ was a fool. Now, Speedy wanted that old TJ back. He slammed the door shut before TJ could get into the driver's seat. "What?" TJ asked. "Today is Tuesday." "No it isn't." "Yes it is!" Speedy was shouting now and he didn't care. "You always propose to me on Tuesday. Why the fuck aren't you doing it today?" "Speedy, love, today is Monday," TJ told him gently. "It's Tuesday!" Johnny rolled the window down. "It's Monday," he chimed in. Speedy released TJ's shirtfront, which he had bunched in his angry shout at TJ. "Oh. Sorry." He rubbed his face in embarrassment, suddenly feeling weary now that his fear had drained out of him. "Okay. Will you marry me, TJ?" "Okay." A simple word, how could it be such a grand, immaculately satisfying word that made Speedy feel as if, at last, his world was turning once again. "I'll marry you," TJ said. "You hear that, Johnny? Speedy's marrying me." Johnny rolled up his eyes and the window. Like Speedy, he hated these mushy stuff his dad was prone to. "That's it?" Speedy asked, still unable to believe what had just happened. "You say yes and that's it?" "Well, I could take you right here and get us both arrested for public fucking," TJ said, "or we can have lunch and later talk about this in the privacy of our room. Maybe we'll fuck our brains out and then later we'll talk, but we'll talk about this. Which do you prefer?" Speedy got into the car.