Note: This story was dynamically reformatted for online reading convenience.
 
 Hilda

   The sound of the grandmother clock ticking away on the mantle place was
the only noise in the room apart from my occasional breathing.  I'm a
thirty-six year old blonde woman with green eyes and bright vibrant skin
but with rosy cheeks and as I lay in my bed my eyes stared blankly at the
portrait across the room.  Candles surrounded it, it was a shrine to the
only girl I thought I'd ever love.  The joint in my hand smoked away
filling my nostrils with the strong smell of burning weed and the world was
a blur around me as I sank deep into the euphoric bliss and relaxation
brought on by the drug.

   My eyes glanced at the picture of a little blonde girl, Macy, directly
in front of me with blue eyes shining bright on her eleventh birthday and a
wide smile on her lips as she gazed into my eyes through the lens of the
camera towards a loving mother who would die for her.  That day came back
to me in a rush of happy emotions, the sounds of squealing laughter as at
least six or seven girls her age, her closest friends, ran around the
garden as me and the other mums sat and chatted on the porch all nursing an
iced tea on that warm, late summer day.

   As if in fast forward it was a few hours later when the cake was being
brought out.  I took the picture as she sat in front of it with her face
aglow because of the eleven bright pink candles on the chocolate cake I
made for her just that morning.  Her rosy cheeks on her pale skin made her
look like a Geisha or something and when she blew out her candles they only
got redder as she struggled for that last bit of air in her lungs to blow
the eleventh candle out in one big puff.

   Cheering and clapping followed and a few of the girls asked what she
wished for.  "I can't say it or it won't come true," I mouthed this
perfectly as Macy spoke in my head, "Isn't that right mummy?"

   "Yes darling," I said back to myself, "Don't tell anyone."

   A week later, the cries of anguish coming from my eleven year old as
they put her in the back of the ambulance nearly ripped my heart in two;
her father was working and hadn't picked up his phone so I was stressed but
trying my best to keep Macy in good spirits.  "It's going too be alright,"
I said to her as I held her hand in the ambulance, "Just be brave for me
baby."

   Her gasps of air and pained breathing set me off along with her but I
had to be strong for her so I forced myself to stop crying.  She had been
rundown by a car, it had hit her going nearly fifty miles per hour in a
thirty zone and the driver had been drunk.  The lucky bastard didn't
survive the crash when he ran through Macy and into a lamppost but my
little girl did and she was going to be okay I was sure of it.

   But she wasn't okay; there was some severe damage to her spine and head
and she didn't last the night.  She breathed her last as I held onto her
hand, her lifeless eyes staring right into mine still full of fear and pain
but the shine was gone.

   After the funeral I was distraught but I tried to keep on working and I
also attended counseling were I was told I had to be strong for Macy and
myself and to try to keep on going but all I could think of now was her
last birthday, a birthday that happened a year ago exactly and I wondered
what she wished for.  She couldn't have wished to be hit by car so what was
it?  The thought was still killing me.

   Poor Macy, I missed her so much.  Her father had left, he couldn't stand
my moping he said, the insensitive prick but he was barely coping himself
so if he thought separating himself from every link to Macy was going to
help him get over it then all I can say is good luck, it wouldn't be that
easy.

   I turned to drugs, a friend of mine recommended weed as it would help me
relax and maybe even get some sleep once in a while.  I only smoked it once
a day before I went to bed and I could easily afford it if I kept on
working, I had to try and not get anymore reliant on the stuff than I
already was though and focus on using it just once so I didn't go to work
completely baked.  That task alone helped me focus my mind on something
other than Macy but the picture staring at me across the room from where I
lay on my bed before sleeping kept her in my thoughts, I wanted her smiling
face in the picture to be the only one I saw when I closed my eyes and not
the one covered in blood and begging me to tell her it was going to be okay
and so I could stop hearing myself lying through my teeth that she would
just be just fine.

   I finished the weed and closed my eyes, the smoke hung in the air
allowing the effect to last long enough for me to fall asleep.  My dreams
were hazy, not much more than colors and distorted shapes but I always woke
up in a cold sweat, like a cold hand had ran its fingers down my spine and
turned my very blood to ice as it did.

   And there it was again, that picture of Macy in the warm glow of the
morning sun as it smiled at me.  I swear it had only gotten wider, the
smile I mean, and that she was trying to tell me that she was happy in
Heaven.  That childish thought was comforting in a way.  I got out of bed
and walked over to portrait, holding it to my chest and humming a song I
used to sing to her before she slept but I've long since forgotten the
words and she would just hum along with me when she was still alive.  I
kissed Macy on the head and put her portrait back before heading downstairs
and fixing myself some breakfast.

   A sunny day was a good day, it kept my spirits up you see and my
therapist told to me to enjoy every little good thing so that I would keep
cheering myself up as the days went by, one by one.  Coffee and two slices
of whole wheat toast was a good enough breakfast for me with honey on top
to keep me energized and full until lunch plus honey always helped me be
cheery.

   I got dressed and left for work, I managed to keep my old job even after
taking a full month off to mourn and then start my therapy sessions but my
boss was a good guy and he did right by most of us if we worked hard. 
After a day of approving sheets of paper that wouldn't come into effect for
the next five years or so I finally got the all clear to go home and get
ready for it all to begin again tomorrow.

   When I reached my doorstep I pulled out the newspaper I subscribed too
from the letter box and stepped inside to read it.  There was a note stuck
to it and so I peeled off the sticky note and read it.

   Courtesy of Hilda

   I laughed to myself, it must be a new papergirl making her mark.  The
last boy was far too careless and it was nice to have the paper intact for
a change.  After reading what I found interesting over dinner I recycled
the paper and found I hadn't put the note in the bin with it, I shrugged my
shoulders and decided it was worth keeping so I stuck it to my fridge and
let it be, thinking she wouldn't do it again.

   But the next day I got a similar note saying the exact same thing as I
came home from work and my neighbor, an older gentleman, approached his
side of the fence to speak to me.  "Did you get these notes as well?" He
asked me, his long white beard touching his chest and he looks remarkably
like a thin Santa Claus or maybe just Dumbledore with a shorter beard.

   "Yeah," I said to him, he was a nice old man and had been doing his best
to look after me since Macy died and although he never brought her up
anymore in a conversation directly I knew what he meant when he asked"So
how are you doing lately Kathy?"

   "I'm fine Hank," I said with a smile, "What about you."

   "Oh you know," he said with a cheery smile back, "Just getting by I
suppose." His wife died of Cancer so we both knew what its like to lose
someone close to us and it was why I considered him one of my closest
friends.  "I have family coming over for a barbeque on Sunday, would you
like to come?" I had family, my mum and dad came by as often as they could
manage but they were in the Bahamas right now.

   "I'd love too," I said happily, excited even, "But wait, you said it was
a family thing?"

   "Don't make me go all soft on you Kathy," the old man said with a laugh,
"I've seen you as family for months now," he gave me another cheery smile
and I thanked him for him the invitation saying I'd happily come over,
"Just come round here whenever you want on Sunday, I'll see you then." He
hobbled back into his house and I just stood and watched the sun go down,
the autumn breeze was cooling after a hot summer so I was just going to
enjoy it before it became blisteringly cold again.

   After standing for at least ten minutes the sun finally descended past
the row of houses and I went back inside to prepare my dinner.  Tomorrow
was Friday and then Saturday was my first day off, I decided to wake up
early on Saturday to ambush this mysterious paper girl and ask her why she
leaves her notes so I could tell Hank.

   Friday came with another note on my morning paper or evening paper
really as I always get it then, and this time there was a little `X' on it
to symbolize a kiss and it was definitely hand written so this girl must
really enjoy her work.  I decided she was some nerdy little thing who
wanted to try and stand out.

   Saturday dawned early for me, I didn't hit the weed that night but I
slept alright anyway and woke up at my usual time thanks to my alarm.  I
had my usual breakfast of coffee and honey on toast then I just sat and
waited.  At about seven thirty, usually half an hour after I leave for work
in the city, I heard the letter box open and so I rushed to the door and
swung it open.

   "Oh," exclaimed a small brunette girl with brown eyes but then I saw her
face, oh my god her face, "Hello-uh-are you okay?"

   My mouth was hanging open, it was dry too and the flies could just fly
right on in there and I wouldn't have noticed.  Her smooth hair fell down
her back in such a familiar style, her eyes twinkled as they stared at me
and her small lips were twisted in a confused smile and her rosy cheeks on
her pale skin made her look likeLook like a Geisha...

   "Macy," I said, my voice shaking.

   "No, Hilda," said the preteen girl with a giggle, "Didn't you get my
notes, it's not a pen name you know as much I-HEY!" I slammed the door,
scared out of my mind and I heard a gasp from Macy-no-Hilda as I did it. 
The paper was all but forgotten in the mailbox as I collapsed onto the
floor leaning against the door, listening to Hilda's footsteps as they
walked down my stone path.

   She looked so much like her save for the colour of her hair and eyes but
everything else was perfect, it was like she wasI couldn't let myself think
it was her because I knew it wasn't, I was there when Macy died and this
was Hilda, Hilda not Macy.  Hilda the paper girl who did a better job than
the boy before and not Macy who could cartwheel down the street without
getting dizzy in the slightest.  My breathing became difficult, my eyes
began to water.

   Oh Macy...I missed her so much...

   The next day I woke up early like before, I subscribed for the Sunday
edition of my paper unlike before just so I could see Hilda again.  Why was
I doing this to myself, this wasn't Macy it was someone different, not
completely different though, maybe she was like Macy maybe she wasn't but I
just had to know.  I had broken out the weed early today; I didn't want to
freak her out so I was using it to relax but just smoking half of what I
usually take before going to sleep.

   The mailbox clattered just I finished up and so I instantly rushed to
the door.  A disgruntled Hilda met me and she had an irritated look on her
face.  "Hi," she said coldly, "Going to slam the door in my face again,
that was rude you know," I took the paper from the mailbox and found no
note, did she hate me now?

   "Sorry," I said apologetically, "I just freaked out a little bit, did it
hit you in the face?"

   "No but you almost did," the girl said and smiled suddenly, "You called
me Macy yesterday, why?"

   "It's personal," I told her, not wanting to explain, "Would you like to
come in?" What was I doing, letting her in could have set me off and next
thing you know you'll send her away with a packed lunch with a promise to
beat up those nasty kids who keep bullying her, fuck for all I knew she was
that bully.

   "Can't, sorry," she sniffed the air, "Anyway it smells like you've been
smoking the same crap my dad does and I'm not in the mood to breath that
shit in," Macy never cursed, not even a little bit, "Anyway it's nice to
meet you-uh?"

   "Oh, I'm Kathy-Kathy Bates."

   "Hilda Summerfield," she told me, "Have a nice day Miss Bates."

   With a cheery smile she turned to leave, I watched her go this time as
she walked in a pair of blue jeans and a brown summer jacket, her white
trainers slapped against the stone of my pathway with the green, luminous
shoulder bag that held her newspapers over her right shoulder.  Before I
turned to go back inside I saw her crossing the road just as a car turned
the corner, the corner was right beside my house and it had been where Macy
was hit by the drunk driver who completely ignored the stop sign.

   With a sound of screeching tires I saw the car hit Hilda.  "Macy," I
cried, running out to her aid only to find her sobbing on the ground
clutching her side.  The car owner panicked and drove away when he or she
saw me, cowardly fucker.  "Macy," I said, clutching her shoulder, "Are you
alright?" She ignored me and just cried.  "Did it hit you full on?" I asked
the crying girl and she shook her head.

   "It nicked me on the side with the mirror," she said through gritted
teeth, "The bag took most of it but oh man that hurts."

   You don't go a month without that happening at least once to some poor
kid who doesn't look both ways in this area and Hilda learned that lesson
the hard way but I was happy to say that Macy was just extremely unlucky,
as happy as I could be I mean which wasn't very.  "Well it wasn't going too
fast so we'll just get some ice on that," I picked the girl up and when she
didn't scream out in pain I was confident she hadn't broken a rib or
anything so I wouldn't need to take her to the hospital I gathered.

   As I walked up to my house Hank came out with his walking stick.  "I
heard tires screeching," he said to me as he came out wearing his stripy
white and blue pajamas.  "Is she alright?"

   "She'll be okay once I put some ice on it to stop any swelling," I said
to him.  By the look on his face he had noticed the resemblance to Macy no
doubt.

   "Maybe you better let me take her Kathy?" he offered, trying to protect
me from myself no doubt, such a sweet old man.

   "Its fine Hank I know what I'm doing," Hilda had an arm coiled around my
neck as she cried into my chest while I cradled her in my arms, "Don't
worry about me." Hank said no more, knowing I could be stubborn and just
watched me bring her inside.  I closed the door with my foot and took Hilda
into the living room and laid her down on the sofa.  I opened some windows
to let the smoke out from earlier then ran into the kitchen and fetched
some ice before putting it in a bag.

   "I'm going to lift your shirt up," I told her once I was back in the
living room, "Just tell me where it hurts." I lifted her shirt up, exposing
a well kept little tummy and midriff and I was stopped just short of a pair
of budding breasts when Hilda showed me a big red blotch that had already
started to bruise but it wasn't swollen, at least not yet.

   I pressed the ice to it and Hilda gasped in pain.  "It's going to be
okay," I told her, "Just relax and let me numb the pain a little."

   Her breathing eventually slowed down and she was calm enough to speak.
"Thanks Kathy," she said sweetly, "That was pretty cool of you."

   "Well I wasn't going to leave you," I said with a smile, "We should call
your mum and dad?"

   "Don't bother, mum left us when I was a baby and dad wont care as long
as I'm still breathing," the bitterness in her tone shocked me.

   "What do you mean?"

   "Nothing," she suddenly said rather defensively.  I sat beside her and
rested her head on my lap, "What are you doing?" She asked me, sounding
confused.

   I realised suddenly that I used to do that with Macy when she hurt
herself.  "Um," I stammered, "Sorry I don't know what came over me." I made
to move away but Hilda stopped me.

   "No it's alright," she told me, "It's kind of nice."

   "Oh," I sighed in relief, "Well...alright then," I ran a smooth lock of
her brown hair between my fingers and she closed her eyes.  The pain in her
side had numbed considerably now and she was able to just relax in my
touch. It didn't take a genius to work out her dad wasn't much of one and
that her mother was probably like my husband who quit when it got tough
except her daughter was still alive.

   I imagined Hilda to be an unloved child but capable of asserting
herself, getting up early everyday to deliver newspapers is a tough thing
to do for a kid her age and she obviously receives very little praise for
her effort from were is counts.  I wondered how old she was just then. 
"How old are you, Hilda?"

   "Why do you need to know?" She said quickly and defensively and I
laughed.

   "Fine, I'll tell you how old I am then you tell me?"

   She looked me in the eyes as if studying my intentions so I tried my
best to tell her they were good intentions when I stared back, "Yeah okay,"
she finally said.

   "Well I'm thirty-six," I said as I continued to run my fingers through
her smooth hair, "Now you?"

   "Twelve," she told me and I gasped loudly, that's how old Macy would
have been, "What is it?" She asked me when she heard me gasp.

   "It-it's nothing." I lied then tried to change the subject, "How's your
side doing?"

   "It's numb," she said like it was unimportant, "But it can't be
`nothing', you've freaked out around me since you first met me and I heard
you calling me Macy earlier when you came to see if I was okay." I hadn't
fully realised I did and I blushed, "Who's Macy?"

   I just knew she'd think I was insane when I told her she looked like my
dead daughter but I got the feeling she would know if I was lying.  "You
remind me of my daughter who died last year," I confessed after taking a
deep breath, "You look like her."

   "Oh," Hilda said and laid her head back down, "Well that explains a lot
but, you know, I'm sorry to hear that."

   "You're not freaked out or anything?"

   "Kinda," she admitted but smiled up at me, "But so long as you don't
make me wear her clothes I'm okay with being here until my side stops
hurting?"

   I smiled at her, "Deal," I said, I still had some of Macy's old clothes
but I would resist dressing Hilda in them which would be easy enough,
"Sorry for being such a weird old lady."

   "No, you're nice," she told me and closed her eyes as she got
comfortable; "I mean my dad isn't mean but he isn't nice either, so I like
you."

   "You do," I felt like a nerd at High School being accepted by the
popular kids but then came the feelings that I was being led on as a joke,
"Do you mean that?"

   "Yeah," she said and clasped my hand, I just realized it had been
resting on her bare stomach inches away from her injury even though Hilda
was holding the icepack now.  I tried to snatch it away but she grasped it
hard, "Don't move it, please," she pleaded slightly, "It-it doesn't bother
me and it's relaxing."

   I smiled at her girly little face and let my hand rub against her smooth
skin.  It felt like Macy's did when I used to bathe her.  Hilda's little
belly button was an inny just like Macy's was as well.  I wondered if my
ex-husband ever cloned Macy without telling me.  "You have such nice skin,"
I told the twelve year old, "You know what, I think I like rubbing it."
Hilda smiled up at me and I gave her my best smile back.

   "I like you rubbing it," she admitted and blushed, "It feels really
nice."

   All of a sudden she started to raise her head and I found myself
lowering my own so I could kiss her on the lips.  It was her intention as
well and our lips met in such a way that I was reminded of when Macy used
to kiss me on the lips when she was younger, it was like this but this time
there was a fire in it.  With a gasp Hilda seemed to lose her nerve, she
got up quickly and gave a nervous goodbye before walking out the door
clutching her side but slinging her bag of papers over her other shoulder
this time.

   "Hilda," I cried out, not wanting her to leave but it was too late and
she was gone.  I fell back on the sofa and let out a sad cry, why did she
leave?  I couldn't let this bring me down though so I steadied my breath
and just decided to get on with my day, there was nothing more to do than
that and I knew that I couldn't let myself grow too attached to this girl
for the sake of my sanity if she rejected me further.

   Then a thought struck me, `my sanity be damned I'm already in love with
this girl' I thought, `I have to see her again, have to hold her and kiss
her and let her know how much I love her.' I had my boss's mobile number as
he had put himself out there as a helping hand whenever I needed it so I
called him and said I was feeling under the weather so that I could see
Hilda again tomorrow when she delivered the paper.  To keep my mind busy
until then though I attended Hank's barbecue but also to make it seem like
nothing was wrong as Hank worried about me.  I told him that Hilda would be
fine and that I had sent her home to recover further and he believed it so
after an hour or two of eating burgers and mingling with people in Hank's
immediate family I decided to just be alone for the rest of the night and
said my goodbyes to everyone.

   By Monday morning I had already decided what I wanted, I wanted to know
Hilda, to get to know this strange girl that looked just like my Macy and
the fact that she didn't have a mother enticed me even more as I had a lot
of love to give since Macy died but I had no one to give it too.  Maybe
Hilda would be the one, not my daughter though as the love I was feeling
her wasn't as maternal as I had thought it had been.

   Hilda didn't take the day off, it seemed the nick on the side was much
less worse than I thought, that or my quick icepack had saved her from a
lot of further pain.  I was about to go to the door and greet her when I
heard her knock this time and not stuff the paper through the letterbox.  I
almost ran to the door in my slippers and dressing gown, nearly throwing it
off its hinges when I opened it.

   "Hilda," I said with a smile, "Hi, how's your side?"

   "Sore to the touch but other than that it's awesome," I laughed at her
choice of words but she kept on talking, she really bounced back though and
was cheery as she was before the accident.  "Listen, I didn't mean to freak
out yesterday."

   "I think we both went a bit too far," I assured her, "But listen, you
have school today right?"

   "Yeah sadly," Hilda said glumly, "Why?"

   I smiled at her and she gave me that adorable confused stare.  ""Skip
it," I told her, "Be with me today and we'll just have some fun."

   "I'll get in trouble if I do," Hilda said but not denying the request.

   "I thought you said your dad didn't care?"

   "Well he doesn't-"

   "And the school won't know any better if you simply don't turn up?"

   "Yeah but-"

   "Then stop your belly aching and come have a girly day out with me," I
took her by the hands and held them tight, "I really want to get to know
you Hilda, give me that chance." I thought I had come on too strong just
then and I was right.

   What she said next was a shift back to reality, "I'm not your daughter,"
she blurted out, "Don't pretend to care just because I look like her." She
turned to leave but I wasn't going to let her, not yet.

   I chased after her and before she noticed me I grasped her arm and
gently turned her around as I got on one knee then I pressed my lips to
hers and I felt her melt.  I was sure now that I didn't love her like I had
loved Macy, no, I loved this girl romantically.  She fought me at first but
I just kept a firm hold on her and she eventually relaxed, giving into to
the sensations of being kissed so passionately and intimately.

   When our lips parted, we were both blushing.  I stroked her rosy cheeks
with the thumb of my hand and smiled at her.  "I know you're not my
daughter," I assured her, "But you're still so special to me already."

   "Is it because I look like her?" she put her hands on my shoulders,
stroking them gently, "Or are-or are you in love with me?"

   "I'm in love with you," I said to her, "But it's not entirely because
you look like Macy, you're pretty in your own way and I just want to show
you my love."

   Hilda took a few seconds to gather her thoughts, "Is this because I told
you about my family yesterday and how my mum isn't around, I don't miss
what I never had you know?"

   "No child should be without a mother," I told her, "I know this is weird
of me to ask but can I just-" I thought about what I was going to say
carefully, "-can I just be there for you, like a mother or just a really
good friend?" Hilda's response startled me again, I had thought she would
deny me and call me creepy or disgusting but in truth she completely lost
it.

   The very offer had sold her; she threw her arms around my neck and
pressed so close into my body it was like she had pushed a button and my
arms automatically hugged her back.  I could hear her softly crying into my
shoulder, having someone who was willing to be that motherly figure had
probably caught her by surprise.  I was without a daughter and she was
without a mother.

   We were made for each other.

   As her crying only got louder, I carried her in my arms and she wrapped
her legs around my waist as I supported her by the backside and took her
inside.  Once there I completely avoided the living room and just went
upstairs to my bed where Macy and I would just lie down together some
mornings when she had woken up before me and just sought my company.  I
didn't want to stop holding her so I lay down on my back as the twelve year
old lay her head on one of my breasts like a pillow.

   She eventually settled down, the tears stopped and a smile crossed her
lips as she looked up at me with red eyes.  "I haven't cried like that
since forever," she told me with a hint of embarrassment, "I must be such a
baby to you?"

   "You're not a baby," I assured her, "Everyone cries, I bet your dad
cried once upon a time."

   "He screams a lot but he never cries," Hilda said it like it was a fact.
She got more comfortable on me and placed her hand on my shoulder.  For
five wonderful minutes we lay still and hugged one another, I had my hands
stroking down her back and absently lifting her shirt as I did but never
very high.

   "Did your dad notice the bruising on your side?"

   "He didn't even look twice at me when his elbow caught my side and I
cried out," Hilda said, her voice still croaking, "He's an insensitive
prick."

   "Wow you did mean what you said yesterday, so long as your breathing he
couldn't care less," I sighed, "Does he work?"

   "Nope," Hilda said, "I'm his source of income really but he doesn't take
my paper route money though because I hide it but he gets all sorts of
benefits but I'm pretty sure he doesn't need disability funding."

   "Leech," I said with a snarl, "Well I'm here if you need to talk about
stuff like that, don't ever be nervous about coming to me with any problems
day or night."

   "Really," Hilda eye's brightened, "No one's ever really listened to me
before."

   "Of course," I said and kissed her forehead; she moved up further though
and kissed me on the lips.  This time my hand went down to her backside, it
wasn't a planned move, just spur of the moment but Hilda didn't seem to
care in fact she looked me in the eyes and just smiled at me.

   Her hand slipped down to my breast and I smiled back when she didn't try
to hide her desire.  "Sure Hilda, you can touch my breasts it if you like,"
I said sarcastically and she giggled before we started kissing again.  Both
her hands were on my breasts before we finished and she eventually started
to squeeze them in her soft little hands.

   "Do you mind if I take my clothes off Kathy?" Hilda asked me, her voice
curious and uncertain.  We had already gone so far, illegally so if I was
right and I was pretty sure sharing a bed with a naked pre-teen would be
bad if someone walked in.  But the way her top hugged her figure made her
look so beautiful, I found myself eager to indulge in this forbidden fruit
of a girl.

   "I will if you will?" I said despite myself but then I found myself
liking the idea for saying it, "I'll start." I let Hilda roll off of me to
lie beside me on the bed, her face aglow with curiosity at seeing an older
woman naked for the first time.  I had a nice slim body and had been using
exercise as another form of focusing my mind on something other than Macy.
I slid out of my dressing gown then lifted my nightgown off and knelt on
the bed naked save for my slippers which soon followed.

   Hilda was blushing hard, her eyes were wide and her lips where so pursed
they had gone white.  It was the most adorable look I had ever seen and
Macy was reflected in it.  My shaven vagina was what she looked at first,
any girl would be curious enough to compare their own to another woman's, I
know I was but her gaze shifted to my slightly flat chest eventually. 
Macy's death had taken its toll on my body but I still had breasts to speak
of thankfully and I had kept myself trimmed because I liked it that way.

   "You can touch whatever you want Hilda," I said to the girl as she
continued to stare, I grabbed her hand gently and placed it on my pussy and
I could feel her finger lightly stroking it to sate her curiosity.  I moved
her other hand onto one of my breasts and she took a nipple in her fingers
and gave it a light squeeze.  I played the part and gave a loud squeal and
her reaction was what I expected it to be, she moved her had back, thinking
she had hurt me.

   "Don't worry baby," I said and pulled her against me, "You're being very
gentle, it just felt nice." I moved both her hands back onto my breasts as
I held her against me with her jean clad bum in my hands.  She rested her
head on my shoulder and so we just knelt there for a time as Hilda became
familiar with my body, occasionally touching my bottom or sliding a hand
between my legs and I was happy that she was exploring.  By the time she
was done I was quite wet and aching to be touched harder.

   "Take off your clothes now Hilda," I said and she did so immediately. 
she slipped out of her jeans so fast I could have missed it then she kicked
off her shoes as she pulled her shirt up and over her head and lay on her
back wearing only a pair of blue panties.  I admired her petite body, her
breasts were only slightly smaller than mine and her pussy was bare like my
own but a big black blotch of a bruise covered her left side but it wasn't
so unsightly as to mar the rest of her beautiful body.  "You're so
beautiful," I told the blushing girl who gave me a sweet smile.

   "No I'm not," she said nervously, "I'm still so boy like," she said it
like it was old news to me but perhaps it was just a poor self image.  I
took a moment to think about what I was seeing, a twelve year old girl in
all her glory and I was about to commit something that was technically a
crime but how could something consensual and beautiful be a crime?

   "Yeah but boys don't have girly parts," I said and pulled her back into
me like before and pressing our naked bodies against one another, "Would
you like to go further Hilda?" I asked her, "We can just hold each other
and be naked but I'd like to go further than that with you?"

   "Yes," Hilda said, looking up at me with pleading eyes, "Yes, I'd love
to go further with you."

   "Alright my darling," I said and stroked her beautiful brown hair, "Just
lie back."

   She did as I asked and placed her beautiful head on the soft pillow of
my bed.  From where she was she could see Macy's picture and before I could
climb on top of her she pointed it out.  "Is that Macy?" She asked me and I
glanced at the picture then nodded, "Wow, she does look like me."

   It struck me as weird that they never met, surely two girls who look the
same would be drawn to one another.  "Did you two ever go the same school?"

   "Maybe," Hilda said, "I'm not exactly friends with the good kids," Hilda
confessed, "I suppose Macy was just a good girl?"

   I was still staring at the picture, craning my neck to gaze at my
daughters beautiful face.  "She was an angel," I said sadly, "And I failed
her as a mother."

   "How'd you do that?"

   "You'll understand when you have kids," I said and bent over to kiss
Hilda, for the moment she forgot what I said and we allowed each other to
be drawn back into our lust and passion.  Hilda became much more confidant
and explored every inch of my body that she could reach with her soft
hands, her breathing started to quicken and her eyes never left mine and
seemed to be unblinking.

   I was in a similar state; my hands pressed into the girls small breasts
and ran down her stomach towards the building wetness where I lightly
stroked up her slit.  Hilda gasped in surprise at the multitude of feelings
as I tickled her sensitive area and she gave a shuddering giggle as I
continued which made me laugh.  No ones made me laugh like this in months.

   I could stand it no more, I had to taste her.  Without any warning
whatsoever I broke our embrace and slid down her nubile body and let my
tongue run over her wet vagina, I had never had sex with a woman let alone
a girl but a part of me knew what to do, maybe it was because I knew what I
liked.  I used to love it when my husband went down on me and so I thought
Hilda would love it if I did it for her and I wasn't wrong in the
slightest. She shuddered and groaned as the feelings in her belly only grew
more wonderful, her very first orgasm on the way to the surface.

   I decided not to overdo it and just focused on stimulating one part of
her body for the moment.  I desperately wanted to squeeze her little
nipples in my hands but I might frighten her if I do too much at once, the
multitude of feelings would certainly make me confused.

   "It feels-" Hilda gasped, "It feels so-feels so good." She was barely
able to speak now the poor angel but I kept on going, I could feel her legs
tensing as they coiled around my back and her fists clenched as she grabbed
handfuls of my hair and pulled but the pain was worth being her first, the
first person to bring her off to her first orgasm and by the looks of it,
it was mind blowing.

   She came hard in my mouth, her squeals sounded like a child in distress
and I would have thought I was hurting her if not for the wide smile I saw
on her face when I looked up.  Tears streamed down her eyes, the sheer
bliss making her cry and cheeks were redder than ever before.  My mouth
filled with her juices, enough to fill half a cup I'd imagine.

   That must have been a great orgasm.

   Her head fell back on the bed, her breathing was quick and shallow and
she had trouble catching it.  "Deep breaths Hilda," I said, rubbing her
soft chest, "How did that feel."

   "Like nothing I've ever felt before," she said lazily, "Like I was-I
dunno."

   "Did you like it?"

   "Yeah," she said, "Yeah it was awesome..."

   I shuddered in delight, this was as new for me as it was for her and I
was glad I did well.  I hoped she'd do it for me when she was ready...