Tainted Lime Reviews Issue #27
March 9, 2002
Reviews are archived at /~TaintedLime/.
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Stories reviewed in this issue:
Caught, by oldwrench (* * *)
Spring Hopes Eternal - The Thief, by celia batau (* * *)
The Protector, by sweetie pie (* *)
Caught In the Act, by Paul (* * *)
The Girl Next Door, by Ann Douglas (* * *)
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{ASSM} ASSM story Caught (MF preg)
By oldwrench <oldwrench2000@yahoo.com>
http://assm.asstr.org/Year2002/35551
A man out taking a walk in the park sees a pretty woman roller
skating towards him. Almost as if on cue, she hits a pebble or a
stick or something and goes flying. He rushes over and catches
her, saving her from a nasty spill.
Since this is ASSM, the woman must then repay him for his valiant
behavior.
Only a couple typographical and homonym errors slipped into this
very well-written tale. But the story is not unlike many stories
you see in ASSM. There is a nice little double-twist at the end
that gives this story a little more interest, but the double-
twist is not set up well enough, and it feels tacked on.
The author has talent and can tell a good story. With a better
introduction of the narrator's situation, this could have been an
excellent story. But it's still a nice, pleasant read.
Rating: * * *
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{ASSM} {ASSD} Spring Hopes Eternal - The Thief {celia batau} (MF fantasy)
By celia batau <pinataheart@bigplanet.com>
http://assm.asstr.org/Year2002/35561
I think this story contains a hidden meaning, but I couldn't
figure it out. It has a personal feel to it, and a fan or
correspondent of the author's may get a lot more out of this
story than I did.
It is beautifully written. Poetic and vivid in its imagery, it
also benefits from an interesting point of view. Once I started
reading it, I couldn't stop, even though I wasn't sure what the
heck it was about.
There are broken hearts, four-legged creatures, and some
interesting sexual imagery. But writing a more complete
synopsis would be pointless. The main reason to read this story
is the beauty of the language - if that's the kind of thing
that floats your boat, you won't do much better than this one.
Rating: * * *
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{ASSM} M/F Romance (The Protector)
By sweetie pie <iluvshvdpusy@hotmail.com>
http://assm.asstr.org/Year2002/35603
Brock Sanford arrives home from Televiv (isn't that where the
Teletubbies are from?) and is greeted by his assistant, Holly.
Holly is wearing very un-businesslike attire, which has Brock
wondering what she is wearing underneath. On his drive home, he
drops a pen on the floor, just so he can get a peek.
In case you haven't figured it out yet, Holly isn't wearing
underwear. They get to Brock's house and they fuck.
This story is not well-written. The paragraphs are way too
long, there are far too many spelling and grammar mistakes, and
there isn't even much of a plot that I could find. With a lot of
work, this might be an OK excerpt from a sexy, action thriller,
but it isn't there yet.
Rating: * *
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{ASSM} Caught In the Act (MF exhib hj)
By Paul <meganfan@yahoo.com>
http://assm.asstr.org/Year2002/35608
A man likes to go to the student massage clinic where pretty 20-
year-old girls are taught how to give therapeutic massages. For a
fraction of the regular price, he gets to be felt up by
attractive young women. After the masseuse has finished, in the
quiet room by himself, he always finishes the relaxation process
by relieving himself with his hand.
This is the story of one particular massage and how a
particularly ambitious masseuse, Ashley, interrupts his post-
massage jerk-off with an evaluation form for him to fill out.
The grammar and spelling is rough in places but is generally
good. The writing is often too abrupt, as if the author is
rushing too fast to get to the good parts. But the massage is
nicely described, and there are even a few moments of brilliance
when Ashley returns to watch the show.
It all balances out to a good story, but not a great story.
Exhibitionism fans will like it a lot, and there is a little bit
here to please other readers, too.
Rating: * * *
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{ASSM} AnnD"The Girl Next Door" FF (1/1)
By Ann Douglas <ann_douglas@hotmail.com>
http://assm.asstr.org/Year2002/35614
Sally returns home from college and, while peeking through the
bathroom window, spots Phyllis, the neighbor lady, squirming
around in bed with another woman. The next day, Phyllis stops by
asking for furniture-moving help. Sally volunteers.
After a long day of heavy cleaning, Sally and Phyllis share a
beer and talk about how their lives are going. Phyllis talks
about her divorce; Sally talks about her college social life. All
the while, Sally daydreams about getting Phyllis in the sack.
Sally decides to push things forward and tells Phyllis that she
saw her the night before. And to put Phyllis at ease, Sally
admits to a couple lesbian flings of her own.
A moment of tension arrives. What will the college girl and
neighbor lady do?
This story has a style that gets more irritating as it goes
along. Instead of using the names of the characters, the author
refers to them by short physical descriptions.
"The nineteen-year old teenager had nothing better to do."
"The curly-haired brunette had ... lived with her husband."
"The curly-haired brunette massaged her womanhood."
"The short haired redhead had to admit ...."
It goes on and on and on, and some of the descriptions are
repeated so often that the effect is almost comical. And several
obvious grammatical errors and typos make the story appear sloppy
in places.
When the author sticks with the character's names, the story
flows well, and the ending is very clever. The story even has a
strong plot. If the annoyances were cleaned up, this would be a
very strong story.
Rating: * * *