>When we left off, i had turned to alcoholism to make myself feel
better after losing a dear comrade.
>Which is pretty much a hyped up piece of melodramatic shit

>Firstly i had only taken like half a shot of rum in some coke,
which is nothing.
>Literally a pittance, made worse by the fact that it was in all
likelihood very cheap rum.
>Next up, i was only doing it because i felt like i was in that
kind of mood where i should be a character that goes to the
liquor cabinet and takes a drink to "Get over it"
>My experience with alcohol up to that point was mostly in media,
so i had no fucking clue what i was really doing anyway.

>If you haven't called it yet, i was being a gigantic raging
emotional faggot over there alone in the kitchen.
>But whatever, that's what i felt like at the time
>I was getting picked on nearly constantly and used like a toy
the entire time
>I'm not going to pretend i didn't enjoy it and throw up a "who
gives a fuck" attitude all the time. But that entire attitude was
biting me in the ass.
>Whenever i made a move, or didn't make a move. Everyone else
would just blame me for making or not making that move.
>There was no escape, i was at fault for everything and the
longer i tried to not make myself an enemy of one girl, the more
i made myself an enemy of the rest.

>Really i was just failing at the politics of the situation
>Whatever i was doing, there was the foreboding sense that i
would end up screwing this all up and end up without any of them
as friends at the end.
>I was really in the stages of regret at this point, questions
flashing across my mind and tearing me up.
>"Was all of this worth losing my best friend?"
>"Is this worth losing three other good friends too?"
>This sounds dramatic, but i was pretty bummed out over the
entire morning
>In my head i was going over the bad parts and ignoring the good
>In that stupid way everyone manages to do when they get just the
tiniest bit sad
>Telling myself i had ruined it all and fucked up everything
>See why i felt like i needed to "Drink" to make it all better?

>Either way i was i was standing in the kitchen glaring angrily
at the lack of more soda in my cup.
>Might as well go figure out where everyone went
>I just slam the cup down on the kitchen counter. It's pretty
loud so i'm sure atleast everyone in the living room heard me.
>I don't think i stomped out, but my footsteps were heavy enough
to be easily audible.
>I get to the living room
>Homely and Birthday are the only two in the living room and are
playing competitive vidya
>They seemed intently focused on winning
>Working out the anger between one another i guess
>I leave them alone, i really want nothing to do with either of
them at the moment

>Still in brooding mode, i meander off to the other side of the
house where i imagine the other girls went off to.
>I find Birthday's room with the door closed
>*sigh* its going to be locked isn't it
>I try the handle loudly
>Its locked
>there's only silence inside, but i hear the faint sound of a TV
humming through the wall so they're probably watching something
with the sound turned off.
>[spoiler]man i miss being able to hear televisions through
walls, stupid LCD technology[/spoiler]

>I've got no interest in going back to the troublesome two in the
living room
>But i'm not welcome here it seems
>I don't even say a word, i just stomp my feet a couple times,
and then step lighter and lighter until it sounds like i walked
away.
>I then sit myself down silently against the wall beside the door
and start listening.

>I'm silent, they're silent.
>I just drift off into thought about how badly of a fuck up i am
>In terms of helping me get over my mood, this is adding negative
percentages.
>I'm sitting somewhere around -300% when i finally hear talking
from inside the room.
>The door (unlike her parents bedroom) isn't a thick hardwood
slab of wood, so i can hear through it more or less fine.
>Its blondie talking
>"Whoever it was is gone now..."
>There's an obvious melancholy tone in her voice
>"I just can't believe he would do something like that" - Blondie
>"Yeah, he was my favorite too" - Raven
>There's nothing but anger in her voice
>In my head i've already decided and confirmed they're talking
about me
>Mood at -400% , each word is hitting where it hurts.

>"Man i sure hope she forgives him, she was in tears wasn't she?"
-Blondie
>"Yeah i don't know what happened there" - Raven
>Oh lord wait who was in tears
>Glasses isn't in the room?
>Glasses is crying?
>Fucking hell that means she's off somewhere else in the house
that i didn't look
>Crying
>Guess she's not as carefree as i imagined her being
>Probably i fucked things up with her just as much because i was
her first.
>I'm feeling like a shitstain on the carpet right then, i don't
even move, i just keep staring forward and listening.

>There's a bit more talk about something i can't really
understand.
>Its like whispering or mumbling, i guess i can't really hear the
entire conversation through the door.
>However various sentences come out louder than the others
>"Really if this continues for much longer i'm not sure what i'm
going to do, i can't take this" -Raven
>More whispering
>"I'm going to cry" - Blondie
>"Whatever he thinks is left, is gone between us" - Raven
>Whatever, im done listening
>I'm still at the door against the wall but i just stop
>My ears don't really turn off, but there's just this loud
ringing that's started up inside my head
>I just can't hear anything over it

>I'm at -700% now, back to dying on the inside, internal turmoil
shredding whatever confidence i had that i could get this
situation to fix itself.

>Welp, better start figuring out ways to kill myself

>I don't actually have a timer for how long i was sitting there
feeling sorry for myself
>I was going over how many different ways i could apologize, or
just leave and never come back, or just beg and plead until i was
back in someone's good graces.
>Eventually the ringing stops and i hear various scuffling noises
inside
>The door opens
>Whoever it is, they were planning on moving to the living room
or something, but just froze when they found me there
>I wasn't looking at them, just staring at the floor infront of
my crossed legs.
>I probably looked like a sad sorry mess, but that's how i felt
so i wasn't trying to hide it.
>"How long were you sitting here"
>Its raven, no emotion at all in her voice
>I'm fucked now aint i

>"The entire time" is the response my brain decides to stupidly
give them
>I guess blondie is on the bed and hasn't seen me yet, because
she lets out a gasp when she hears my voice.
>Raven takes two very very very loud stomping footsteps towards
me and reaches around my front and grabs a handful of my shirt
collar
>She's not nearly strong enough to actually lift me up like that,
but it doesn't matter
>I stumble to my feet on my own, completely avoiding eye contact.
>I'm just staring down at my and Raven's feet, nothing else.
>I'm ready for whatever they want to dole out to me
>I guess it might make them feel better, and thats all i want out
of the situation.
>Raven shoves me inside of the room
>I don't even resist
>The door slams behind me
>She's got my collar again, and i'm up against the door
>I'm trying to avoid eye contact still, but she shakes me until i
look up at her
>Her eyes have something in them i can't read anymore, or maybe
i'm just too busy feeling sorry for myself to try.

>She shoves her face closer to mine and gives me some kind of
glare
>i don't care what it was, it was just a glare
>I can smell her breath
>Whisky?
>My eyes dart around the room for the first time
>Its rather dark in here compared to the hallway outside
>The blinds are all closed

>The Television is on, but is paused at the main screen of some
DVD and isn't playing. Its giving the entire room a blueish glow.

>There's a bottle and three small glasses with ice and liquor in
them on the floor.
>Three?
>I look at the bed
>Blondie and Glasses are staring at me apprehensively, each one
has an earbud in one ear and they're listening to something on a
laptop.
>They don't seem to be paying attention to whatever is on the
screen, even though i can see the reflections of some kind of
show in each of their eyes and the dancing shadows across the
wall behind them.

>At first my mind is reeling, i wonder if i was misunderstanding
who they were talking about and it was just a show or something.
>I get brought back to my not-mind by raven pulling me forward by
the scruff of my shirt, and then slamming me backwards again.
>"Why were you listening outside?" - There's only anger in this
question
>I mumble/stutter a half bullshit response
>It's really not believable though, punctuated by being slammed
against the door again.
>My head is kinda hitting the door every time, it hurts.
>I'm not defending myself because i feel like i deserve it.
>I've dug my grave and now i'm going to lie in it.
>She can smell my breath now that i responded
>Her face changes from emotionless to suddenly understanding that
i had been drinking too.
>She's gone from perfectly reasonable angry Raven, to batshit
angry Raven
>"Why were you drinking..." - Her voice isn't even angry anymore
>There's actually nothing in her voice, its an empty question

>I'm not going to just take that one
>"Why the fuck were you all drinki..."
>I get slammed against the door again and can't even finish
>That one actually really really hurt, she's not scuffing me up
anymore she's actually trying to hurt me.
>I'm still mentally kicking myself and telling myself i deserve
it though
>I'm pretty much a pathetic human being, fuck myself for screwing
this all up
>Not an ounce of resistance in my body against this assault
>Her next words were screamed in a flurry, i don't even think she
thought about them before she said them.
>"WE'RE not the problem here, YOU are"
>There is only pain in those words
>I mentally scrunch up into a smaller ball


>I would describe what i was feeling, but i was forcing myself
not to feel anything.

>As if the act of feeling nothing at all over all of this was
actually more painful than feeling something.
>I don't know how that works, don't ask me, but it happens
sometimes.
>I've got a thousand apologies lined up in my head that i wrote
outside
>I bring my eyes up from the floor and look raven in the face
>I start reciting one
>"I... i know i've fucked everything up"
>The entire room is silent, they seem to be weighing on whatever
i'm going to say next.
>Raven has me pinned back against the door still
>Her eyes are shining
>Her face is genuinely contorted into rage.
>I try to choose my next words carefully
>"I tried not to play favorites and make an..."

>I'm interrupted by Raven's hand
>To the side of my face
>Hard
>"FAVORITES!?!?!?!"
>That's not raven's voice

>It can't be
>it's like the battlecry of a harpy you've accidentally stumbled
across a nest of.
>after you killed her husband
>and crushed all of her eggs
>and she hit me
>I don't even need to explain what's wrong with that
>I already told you whats wrong with that
>But i can't take any time and contemplate which alien has
invaded raven's body and taken her over because i'm getting
screamed at still
>"THAT'S ALL YOU THINK THIS IS?"
>"YOU PLAYING FaVorItEs?"
>She enunciated favorites like its some kind of huge complicated
word, but it gets the point across like icy hot blasts

>"ILL SHOW YOU FAVORITES"
>I'm really not able to pay attention to anything else she's
screaming because at this point she's hit me full palm on the
side of my head again
>[spoiler]I don't know how many of you anons have been hit by
women but its really not like it hurts or anything[/spoiler]
>[spoiler]It does, but as a male you're used to getting hit by
your bros, so your pain threshold is rather high[/spoiler]
>[spoiler]That doesn't mean that getting hit in the face is
painless though.[/spoiler]
>[spoiler]Especially not when the female in question puts all her
strength (and trust me they get like 10x stronger when they're
emotional) into beating your face in.[/spoiler]
>My ears were ringing, the side of my face was white hot like it
had just been pressed against a heated frying pan.
>The pain wasn't what was on my mind though
>The words "She's not hitting me" just repeated over and over in
my head
>She can't be, she wouldn't ever, this can't be her.
>I took hit after hit
>All i could hear were the cushioning SMACK of each contact.
>The ringing in my ears followed every one.


>I take about six hits in total and it stops
>I've moved halfway across the room during this entire thing and
i'm now actually scrunched up in the corner between the cabinet
the TV is sitting on and the wall beside the door.
>I'm just staring lifelessly down at the floor and leaning
against the cabinet
>I'm dimly aware of six feet, so i assume Blondie and Glasses got
up and stopped her
>I'm not really sure what i feel about that development, i still
feel like i deserved every single hit.
>I guess i was going through stockholm syndrome of sorts,
emphasizing with my abuser.

>My ears are still ringing, but its lessening enough to hear the
angry words being flung around.
>I just dumbly stare as raven's feet pull back from the group and
stomp away
>I can't really hear the stomps, but i can feel the vibrations
through the floor.
>I'm mentally screaming for someone to stop her, but i don't say
a word.
>Whatever just went down, we're definitely not best friends
anymore
>Or friends even

>Next thing i see is Glasses' face in front of my own
>She's crying for real this time
>Its running down her cheeks and down the corners of her mouth,
which is scrunched up into a worried purse.
>She's places her hand on my cheek and seems to be checking for
damage
>Her hand is freezing compared to the solar-flare of heat
emanating off my face
>i guess i don't have any permanent damage because i'm hoisted to
my feet a second later
>Kinda shuffled over to the bed and i fall on it face first
>I'm not even fully on the bed but i don't give a shit
>Im not in pain though, or whatever pain i'm in is being droned
out by the suffering soul-crushing feeling of my heart actually
being ripped from my chest.
>Gravity does give a shit about me not being on the bed though,
and quickly i find myself sliding to the floor again.
>I end up sitting at the base of the bed and looking up at
glasses and blondie
>One thought on my mind
>Raven
>I manage to eek some words out "Go make sure she doesn't do
anything..."
>I pause, i don't want to say it but its on my mind so i'm sure
its on theirs too
>"Stupid"

>Blondie is off to the living room rather quickly
>I hear frantic yelling in the distance about how Raven and I
just had a fight and they need to find raven.
>I smile a little bit when she says its "thier fault"
>for fucking once someone understands
>for fucking once
>Glasses doesn't say a word, she just silently sits beside me at
the base of the bed
>I feel her wrap her arm around me, but i'm numb and silent
>Its still comforting
>I rest my head on her shoulder and just continue staring into
the distance and listening to the sounds of the house being
overturned in search for raven.

>This goes on for a while
>Yells of "Raven where are you?"

>and "Come out and talk please!"
>echo through the house.
>I'm staring at one of the cups of liquor on the ground that was
tipped over in the scuffle.
>There's ice cubes and a puddle, just sadly melting
>Neither of us give enough of a shit to clean it up.
>I do get around to asking how many raven had though.
>"We told her to stop" was the response i get from glasses
>That kind of response that makes you worried because of how much
seemingly innocuous regret is inlaid into it.
>"How many" I growl
>I'm now realizing that the bottle of whiskey is actually half
empty.
>"We had one, each, she had...."
>"Three"
>What the actual fuck
>These aren't even shots these are actual cups.
> what the fuck was she thinking.
>How could she even be that fucking stupid


>My mind isn't even feeling sorry for myself anymore
>Three fucking cups jesus christ
>even i would be out like a fucking light with that much, and
she's smaller than everyone here.
>I'm furiously angry at Blondie and Glasses
>How fucking retarded could they be to be sitting on the bed
letting raven fucking drown three fucking cups.
>How are they that oblivious to her feeling like shit
>Not to mention we now have no clue where she is.
>So she's hiding somewhere, with enough whiskey in her stomach to
get severe alcohol poisoning or worse, who knows how much else in
her blood stream, and to top it off we have no clue where she is.
>AND There's still yelling in the house so nobody has found her
yet.

>I'm not even going to stand for this shit
>I rattle off so many harsh names and insults at glasses that
it's like she's hit with a god damn shockwave.
>I'm up and out the door as i tell her plainly and loudly that
she's an absolute shit friend.
>I end up in the living room where blondie and birthday are going
over where they haven't looked
>I announce to them loudly that blondie is fucking retarded and
raven has had three full cups of whiskey
>Birthday is speechless
>She's got the look of a deer stuck in headlights
>Blondie takes my words like a champion though
>Even though her face has "Sorry" all over it
>I guess she knows she really fucked up

>I don't wait for her decision or reaction past that though
>I'm out of the room and roaming the house trying to decide where
the fuck raven has gone
>Glasses seems to be looking too, nobody can find her
>She didn't leave the house because nobody heard any doors slam,
but just in-case homely pops out front and goes running around
the block to try to find her.
>I admire the effort, but i know she's gotta be in the house
somewhere
>I just can't think
>I can't fucking think

>I try to piece together where in the house nobody would have
looked
>Its been 5 frantic minutes, i can't even begin to imagine how
drunk she is and still digesting more.
>I ask blondie if she checked the closet, she shys her eyes
downwards and says yes.
>I ask glasses if she checked the bathrooms, also a yes
>I'm trying to narrow it down where she could have run to
>The entire time i can't get my mind off the fact that she had
actually hit me
>Out of all the things she could be feeling right now its ashamed
of herself
> I know her too well for her to really be angry, she's hiding
because she's afraid of what she's done and ashamed.
>Oh

>I know exactly where she is
>I know its not the master bedroom because it's got a baseboard,
and not birthday's
>Guest bedroom
>I rush over to that part of the house
>I barge in the door announcing what a fucking idiot she is
>There's just big boxes under the bed
>Oh fuck
>She can't be under there
>I jump on the bed and crawl across
>There's no sounds, just the squeaking of the bedsprings
>I look down on the other side
>Boxes
>No no no where the hell is she

>I fall back onto the bed and make the entire thing creak again
>I think i hear a squeak that isn't the bedsprings but i'm not
sure if i imagined it or not
>Wait a fucking second
>What i just saw plays over in my memory again
>I check over the side again
>One of the boxes has the corner actually sticking out an inch
away from the bottom of the bedframe
>Sherlock holmes moment here
>No way anyone would purposely have boxes that didn't fit under
the bed
>I get out and actually break part of the box ripping it out from
under the bedframe
>I don't give a fuck
>Guess whose leg i find?


>The biggest idiot in the house that's who
>fucking pulled the boxes back behind her to hide
>If she had stayed down there on her back under the bed
>she would have passed out and thrown up.
>and fucking choked to death on her own vomit or something

>even if she hadn't thrown up our schools talked to us all the
time about alcohol poisoning
>Hypothermia, Heart palpitations, Shallow and eventually
completely ceased breathing.
>for a fucking 80-90 pound girl who drank as much as she did,
there is no doubt in my mind even to this day.

>she would have actually fucking died, if i hadn't been able to
find her
>This is not fucking cool at all in my book
>The sheer level of stupidity and selfishness that this girl had
just caused was mind boggling
>The entire last half hour was so unlike her in every way
possible that i couldn't even be sure it actually happened.
>Not to mention if i hadn't found her i would have blamed my god
damn self
>The level of actual selfishness was off the charts here
>I wasn't even capable of speech that could describe how fucking
atrocious this all was in my head

>I don't even give her a chance to react

>I'm not even thinking through my actions anymore, it's just all
instinct.
>In three seconds she's sprawled out on the floor blinking at the
brightness of the light
>She's crying
>Fuck if i care
>In Seven seconds i have her on her feet
>In Ten seconds I'm hauling her out the door, one of her arms
over my shoulder
>She's awful on her feet, showing all signs of a person who's had
way, way, way way too much to drink.
>Fuck if i care
>Fifteen seconds i've yelled throughout the house that i've found
her
>Scampering feet and ten seconds later i'm in the small bathroom
with raven, and glasses is helping me hold her up and drag her.
>I drag her forcibly over to the bathtub and shove her down so
she's kneeling on the floor and her head is over it
>She's crying and saying that i'm hurting her
>Fuck if i care.

>I'm not even sure its me controlling my own body at this point
>"Make yourself puke"
>She's crying and shaking her head
>"I don't wa..."
>I interrupt her bullshit excuse with a fucking lion's roar of
"NOW"
>She's still not having it and shaking her head fervently from
side to side.
>Its actually flinging her tears and splattering me with them
>I think actually most of it might be slobber too, she's an awful
sniveling mess
>Alright have it your fucking way
>I just grab her head, pull it back and jam my actual fingers
down her throat

>This is accompanied by all the sounds you would associate with
foreign objects violently being thrust into your mouth
>Sobbing
>Coughing
>Muffled Screams
>I know every anon here has had a finger or two in their throat
by their own volition once or twice.
>Now imagine trying to do that if the mouth and human attached to
the mouth is extremely against this idea.
>Her throat was contracting
>Her tongue was violently trying to force me out
>She was clamping down her teeth as hard as she could
>My hand was actually covered in bite marks and i couldn't be
sure the bitch had actually broken a bone or two or not
>But Between glasses yanking back on her hair and me forcing my
hand into her mouth and prying it open with my other hand, i do
manage to get two fingers deep enough to trigger the gag reflex
>This doesn't work in any kind of polite manner either

>Vomit went pretty much everywhere
>All over my arm
>All over my shirt
>All over Raven's shirt
>All over Glasses shirt
>All over the bathtub
>The only things that didn't get covered in chunks of sandwiches,
coke and whiskey was pretty much her hair because Glasses had a
firm grip on that.
>I just let go of her and leave her to limply retch into the
bathtub
>I rip off my shirt, use what was clean on it to wipe my arm and
hand off as well as i could, and just crumple it up and toss it
into the bathtub.
>I then took a firm grip on Raven's hair right above where
glasses was holding it
>I'm sure i was squeezing hard and pulling on the roots, it
probably hurt her, but i was no longer in a gentle mood
>I mention for glasses to get her shirt off as well, which comes
off at about the same speed as mine and is tossed into the tub.
>She's wearing a bra, i know you care but i didn't at the moment.

>Raven is done retching and is just limply lying across the
bathtub ledge
>We just scoop her upwards and her shirt comes off too
>I just use it to roughly wipe her face and chin down and toss it
as well
>She's still sobbing
>Too fucking bad
>I grab a washcloth off the towel rack, wet it with hot water and
just hand it to glasses
>I get a chance at this point to see the three women outside the
door staring in with worried looks on their faces.
>I don't even look at them directly, i just stand by the sink.
>I watch in the mirror as Glasses lovingly cleans up Raven like
you would a small child
>The washcloth goes over the sobbing girl's face
>wipes away her tears
>the spittle from the sides of her mouth
>the vomit from her chin and upper chest
>the thought came to my head that glasses would make a great
mother someday.
>This is quickly discarded as impossible.

>She's clean enough
>I get the washcloth back and just leave it in the sink
>I kneel down, wrap my arms around raven's bare waist and hoist
her up
>She doesn't really go anywhere just crumples
>Oh wow her legs don't fucking work anymore
>Im so fucking done with this girl
>I just kneel down and grab one of her thighs and wrap my arm
around her underarm and back
>Then i hoist it all upwards
>This results in the lazyiest fucking possible way of picking up
a girl
>But its the easiest if you're in a small space and have zero
leverage on a limp body

>i've got one leg fully over my shoulder, the other just hanging
loose
>Then her entire upper body is hanging off to the other side of
me
>She's kinda complaining
>No fucks given
>I just turn sideways and walk her out of there and back to the
guest room

>Glasses is step in step with me though, god damn miracle woman
she is.
>Before i'm even to the bed, Glasses has rolled back the covers.
>Raven goes in
>We prop her up with pillows on her side ( i guess one of us had
seen it in a movie or something)
>Wrap her up so she can't move in blankets
>Problem fucking solved
>Let her sleep the rest of whatever is in her system off
>She's still kinda awake though
>I probably have to make sure she atleast goes to sleep
>I lie back on the bed and turn over to look at her
>she's half awake
>[spoiler] when you get someone really drunk into a warm comfy
bed, they fade off fast[/spoiler]
>i glare at her.
>She starts moving her lips
>Faint but clear "thank you"

>I say the first thing that comes to my mind
>"I fucking hate you"
>Yep, that was the first thing
>She doesn't even flinch, frankly i think she smiles
>she mumbles "i know" before she's off to slumberland
>Yeah well fuck you and sweet dreams too.

>I sit up
>I'm still shirtless
>Likeigiveafuckanymore
>I stand up and start to leave before realizing we probably
should check in on her every couple minutes
>I just point at girls and make it clear it's their job to make
sure she's breathing every 10-15 minutes
>I grab glasses' arm and lead her back to the bathroom
>Close the door
>Lock the door
>Turn on the shower
>Watch as the disgusting mess just kind of washes away down the
drain
>Of course its not going to be that easy though, chunks get stuck
everywhere and its all over the clothes.
>Glasses and i spend ten minutes scrubbing the bathroom clean
>We don't take off any more clothes
>We don't really get more than our upper torsos in the shower
>But we get everything clean, and wash ourselves off thoroughly

>We walk out of the bathroom with pretty much the entire top
halves of our bodies dripping wet, and a pile of clothes in my
hands.
>We get about five steps out of the bathroom before i yell out
across the entire household.
>"BLONDIE, HOMELY, BIRTHDAY, LIVING ROOM NOW"
>they better fucking listen
>We end up waltzing into the laundry room and just tossing the
wet clothes in an empty hamper, we'll deal with that later.
>We move back to the living room and they're actually kind of
lined up like soldiers
>I don't think it was intentional but i just force glasses to
stand in ranks along with the rest of them.
>She's still not wearing a shirt
>I'm still not wearing a shirt
>That doesn't make my fucking terror inducing look of malice any
less scary to them all though.

>I'm like a god-damn army sergeant up in here addressing troops.

>I've got rules to lay down of my own now.

>First thing i do is call blondie and glasses absolutely shit
friends again.

>I make it clear that they really fucked up, not just in the
little "Oh well you could have stopped it" way either.

>I make it firmly clear that although she's completely to blame
for drinking so much herself, they could have just stopped her at
any time

>I make it clear that they both owe Raven a serious something
whenever the time comes for favors to be cashed in.

>Glasses gets off the hook a bit because she did really help me
with her though.

>Next on my list is fucking alcohol
>I lay down the law, nobody is to touch another god damn drop.
>I send Blondie to go retrieve the cups and bottle from
birthday's room and burn them.
>We don't say a word while we wait for her to come back
>Its pure silence
>I've got a look on my face that makes sure it stays silence.
>All the girl's are really standing up straight now, it is like a
bunch of marines.
>They're probably terrified of me.

>Eventually blondie returns and assumes her position in line.

>Third on my list is the sleepover itself
>Its over
>The silence doesn't hold
>Dissent in the ranks
>"We shouldn't be punished its her fault!" - Blondie
>"We weren't even drinking!" - Birthday
>I pull the shut the fuck up card
>Twice
>I make it very god damn clear that a girl almost died here
>That us just dicking around and having a "good" time was over
>I make it full well clear that i'm going to go call Raven's
mother and get her to pick up her daughter and that this
sleepover is over.

>Everyone groans
>Homely blurts out "It's not our fucking fault she has problems"
>"We're not as fucked up as your FRIEND"
>Oh man homely
>The one thing you could have said to set me off
>You did it
>I just slap a smile on my face
>A shallow, empty, cheek to cheek, terrifying smile.
>She sees it and shrinks back, no argument left.

>I don't even wait for any more opinions and just start walking
away.
>"Wait"
>Its Glasses
>"You can't, you know you can't"
>*sigh*
>She's right
>I'm on great terms with raven's mom, but even the most innocent
explanation for why she was drunk and out like a light would just
set off old bombs that are better left buried.
>fuck maybe i can call my mom or something
>"Take care of raven"
>Right....
>I guess its a really dumb idea to get any parents involved in
this

>*sigh* doing the irresponsible thing is the right choice i
guess.

>It would set off lots of parental bullshit meters if the other
parents found i was around at this sleepover anyway, and that
alcohol was involved.
>Only so much of a lie you can hold when shit like this goes
down.
>Not to mention the "Almost died" part.
>Blondie points this out word for word.
>Plus that whole almost dying thing
>I guess she's right
>I turn around

>"LISTEN UP MAGGOTS"
>they all jump like half a foot and stand up straight
>god damn that was pretty neat i didn't think they would do that.
>"If we're going to continue this we need some oath of secrecy
that nothing leaves this sleepover"
>Birthday comes up with some sappy multi-pinkie-finger swear
system and oaths are said to not speak a word of anything that
happened or happens.
>[spoiler]For those of you who don't know what a pinky swear is,
it requires all participants to extend hands and *link* your
pinkies with one another.[/spoiler]
>I just stand there and watch with my hands behind my back

>[spoiler]YW: Loney anons[/spoiler]

>Now that this is done, i snap at Homely to go make sure raven is
alright.
>She's up and out of the room in an instant
>God i wish i could do that all the time.
>I'm out of alpha for the time being though, so i just ask "then
what are we doing now"
>It kinda comes out with a little bit of alpha left over, but its
less of a question than a demand.
>Its only like 1:00 PM
>Birthday suggests more board games
>I don't give a shirt
>glasses doesn't seem to give a shirt either
>We both don't have shirts to give
>I'm not fucking fixing that though, lets play board games.

>Birthday pulls out the pile of board games again
>Monopoly no
>Risk is too long
>Shoots and Ladders lol
>Chess Lol
>Checkers Lol
>Battleship No
>Jenga
>Hell yes
>Blondie says no to jenga though
>POKEMON MASTER TRAINER MOTHERFUCKING BOARD GAME
>HELL FUCKING YES

>THIS IS HOW YOU GET OVER NEAR DEATH SITUATIONS

>We set that shit up
>"Wait up, winner needs to actually get something" - Birthday
>"They can tell all the losers to do one thing together and they
have to do it?" - Homely
>Meh i guess thats not that bad an idea homely
>but i feel like anyone else would have come up with better
>Everyone seems to like that rule though.
>Time to be a fuckin pokemon master
>God damn roaming the countryside
>Capturing all the pokemon
>[spoiler]that game had like 150 pokemon tokens you could
capture, it was great and nobody had it[/spoiler]
>We get to the elite four
>Each of us is getting our asses wrecked
>Except for one girl

>Homely
>GOD DAMNIT
>She rolls a motherfucking rare chance card and captures an
articuno
>and a Zapdos
>Got like a fully evolved set of god-tier pokemon
>Seriously what the fuck
>Everyone else is floundering around with magicarp and ratatats
>She just rolls through and dominates everything
>Blows through the elite four, wins whatever the end of the game
was.
>I can't handle this
>Everyone is mad
>"Alright i get to tell you guys to do something right?"
>Fucking hate you homely so much this better be good.

>"Everyone needs to stand on their heads for 20 seconds"
>EVERYONE IS REALLY MAD
>WHAT KIND OF DUMB FUCKED UP DEMAND IS THAT HOMELY
>HOLY SHIT THAT'S WORSE THAN LIKE ENTRY LEVEL TRUTH OR DARE
>FUCKING GOD DAMN IM GOING TO KILL YOU OFF AS SOON AS I GET A
CHANCE
>I CAN'T EVEN HANDLE HOW BAD YOU ARE AT SEXY STO...
>"Without your shirt tucked in"
>ehh... i guess that's alright
>still pretty shit though
>Only really works on blondie and birthday, but i guess that's
fine.

>I go first
>i can't stand on my head for shit
>I just fall over
>Can't hold 20 seconds at all
>Can't even hold 5
>Eventually homely takes pity on me and grabs my legs and holds
me up
>which would be pity if she didn't take the chance to run her
hands up and down my ankles.
>I just shut up and ignore her, since its not really something
that's likely to make the other girls angry, and get my 20
seconds over.
>Glasses decides to go next
>She's perfect at standing on her head
>I don't understand how that works
>Probably breasts are counterbalances or something.
>Her breasts go from sagging a little bit downwards, to upwards
toward her face as she does the flip over.
>She's still got her bra on, so there's not much movement really,
but it's a lovely excuse to stare at her chest and delicious
underboob for twenty seconds.
>She eventually rights herself and is finished
>The best part is i can still stare at her chest

>I'm broken out of my reverie by blondie offering up her turn
next.
>She does a half somersault and ends up with her legs kicking in
the air.
>Her shirt falls down and is pretty loose, so right over the
front of her bra it goes.
>There's an absolutely glorious span of skin visible.
>From the waistband of her shorts (which seem to be a tad low on
her hips), to the lovely triangle of flesh above her breasts but
below her shirt.
>Even her bellybutton is tantalizingly visible
>Her chest is rather firm so there's no sag at all upside down.
>Just cute blue-bra encased breasts for twenty seconds.
>With adorable kicking legs in the air.
>except she tumbles down after fifteen
>Homely stomps her foot
>"You have to do all twenty!"
>Hahahaha, re-dos
>Blondie is forced to do another entire twenty seconds
>with enough skin that i'm inclined to become a vampire again.

>Last up is birthday
>She's blushing in the corner and standing behind where glasses
is.
>I don't know why, because the only person she would be
embarrassed about showing her tits to would be me
>And she probably knows i was looking at them all morning
>They're just tits, leme see em already
>She steps out
>OH
>RIGHT
>she's wearing a skirt
>Homely you evil genius

>She seems to just decide in her head she should get it over
with.
>Birthday walks over to where everyone else was doing handstands
and kinda kneels there facing away from us.

>Then just leans forward with her arms on the ground and elevates
one leg up in the air.
>Gravity does its job and her skirt just falls down around her
torso
>She lifts up the other leg and keeps them both held towards the
ceiling
>We can't see her chest with her skirt falling around her
shoulders, but what we do see is much better.
>First we start at the ankles, her long smooth legs were
completely revealed towards us, i could see knees, thighs and
even the elusive upper thigh in one look.
>Her skin was a lovely shade of white, i guess she didn't tan
much either.
>She was also shaved smooth the entire way, legs and all.
>This means one great thing
>Her underwear is firmly pressed into the crease of her crotch.
>This leaves absolutely nothing to the imagination
>As far as we were all concerned, we knew exactly where that
vagina started and ended.

>She holds this position for 10 seconds
>12 seconds
>14 seconds she gives a little waggle
>She's on the ground at 16.
>I don't understand how, she had perfect form.
>Well you knew the rules, she had to go again
>Up in the air her legs went again
>Down around her shoulders the skirt went again
>Up in the air my boner went.
>this time she wiggles her legs a little bit the entire time
>This forces the panties back and forth through the crease
>We're really just standing like four feet away from this, even
the girls were staring.
>16 seconds
>17 seconds
>She's on the floor again
>Homely is looking embarrassed, she tries to say that Birthday
made it to 20 seconds that time.
>Birthday won't have any of it
>"No no no, i can do it i swear!"
>"Let me try again"
>She's sneaking peeks at all of us while giving this little piece
of acting though
>We know.

>Birthday stands back up, backs up and puts her hands on her hips
and pulls and wiggles a tiny bit
>Says she's "Readjusting"
>She gets back in position but she's facing us this time.
>She goes up, first one leg, than the other.
>Because she started facing us, it takes longer for the skirt to
fall out of sight this time.
>When it does we get three audible gasps from our crowd
>Me twice
>and Glasses
>She had wedged the back part of her underwear perfectly between
the crease of her buttcheeks.
>Both of them were perfectly visible, flapping in the wind even.
>Not to mention we got to see the entire smooth backs of her legs
to go with it
>She holds this for fifteen seconds
>Then she spreads her legs and gives us a full view of her crotch
>Panties digging in the entire way
>Then she starts falling again

>Not this time
>Homely grabs her legs and forces her upright again for the last
5 seconds
>Awe
>Homely you were so close
>Birthday gets up and won't actually look any of us in the eyes
though
>I guess it helped that her skirt completely hid us from view
when she was doing it.
>Homely declares that rule a terrible failure and that we
shouldn't use it again
>backfiredonyoudidn'tit
>She's complaining she's the only one who didn't get a turn
>That's alright in my book
>We ignore her
>I inform blondie she's in charge of coming up with the next rule
and i walk off to check on raven

>I pop into the guest room
>She's curled up with her arms wrapped around one of the pillows
that's propping her up
>She hasn't really moved much otherwise
>She's got a big clump of hair sticking into the side of her
mouth though
>I wipe it away and try and tuck it behind her ear with my hand
>I don't really break contact and move closer to check her
breathing and i move my hand over her forehead to check her
temperature.
>[spoiler]at the time i wasn't really sure what i was supposed to
be doing ok[/spoiler]
>[spoiler]i just associated it as being dangerously sick, so you
know check everything[/spoiler]
>Confident she's safely in the arms of slumber and not eternal
slumber, i return to the board games room

>Blondie hasn't really come up with a new rule
>she's just saying we should get to ask one person truth or dare
>*sigh* i hate this game i never win
>[spoiler] its not possible to win truth or dare with
women[/spoiler]
>Come to think of it i don't seem to win anything with these
women
>Jenga is determined as our next endeavour of time wastery.
>We set up the tower and throw down the rules
>Everyone gets a turn, if you make the tower fall you have to set
it up again and wait until we start a completely new round.
>It starts 5 players, then 4, 3, 2
>Winner gets to truth or dare one person.

>We play blitzkrieg rules (after the first round of turns, you
have to take 2 blocks, then 3)
>So rounds go pretty damn fast
>Homely out first
>Glasses
>Then Me
>Birthday Vs Blondie
>Insane tower balancing skills
>I don't understand how its not falling down but they're good.
>They get to the sixth set of turns
>Birthday manages to take three pieces and place them ontop, then
get another two from the stack she's made
>But she's out of pieces and screws up the last one.
>Blondie wins
>Alright finally time for some serious lewd
>Come on blondie, lets do some justice
>Blondie turns to face Glasses
>"Truth or Dare?"
>Glasses picks Truth
>"Whats the Most perverted thing you've ever done?"
>FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUU

>Don't fucking answer that glasses
>You know better
>God damn if any of them find out i'm so dead
>I decide the best choice of action is a tactical retreat the
second she breaks the news
>A tactical retreat down the street
>Glasses doesn't even flinch though
>She just puts on her typical Evil Smile and begins
> ">Sure thing, that's easy!"

>Oh no
> ">It Happened quite recently i guess"
>Every muscle tenses in my body i'm ready to fucking bolt
> ">Well, you guys know that trip i took on an airplane earlier
this month?"
>I'm halfway out the door mentally
>Wait what
>I do actually flinch though, glasses definitely sees it.
>If anything she smirks wider

> ">Well, on the trip there i had a seat all by myself by a
window"
> ">Next to this older guy, some family man, had two kids and a
wife down the isle"
> ">I was really kind of worked up, i hadn't really been alone
all vacation and the book i had was getting kinda intimate and
wasn't helping"
> ">I ended up throwing my jacket over my lap and just.... well
you know"
> ">Not just once too, i did it twice and i think the guy next to
me noticed"
> ">Actually i'm sure he noticed..."

> ">I... think it made it better...."
>She has somehow kept a straight face this entire time
>The girls break out into hoots and giggles when she finishes her
story though.
>I've got a kind of stupefied face on, i'm still not sure if i
should run or not.
>I'm worried, because she's either lying through her teeth and is
an absolutely amazing liar, or that really happened.
>I don't know if thats hot or not
>Not to mention that might be more perverted than sex with me.
>But just the fact that might have been true, or she just came up
with it on the spot.
>Glasses is scary
>My male ego was confused.
>I don't know... anons i need clarification is... that more
perverted?

>Fucking glasses
>I did, but still
>Next round is set up
>Its Me vs Blondie vs Glasses in the finals
>Blondie makes it to 4 pulls before she screws one up.
>Next round
>I lose on pull #3
>Fuck, i'm no good at this game.
>Glasses is staring me down, i prepare for the question and
mentally decide dare is my best bet.
>"Blondie, Truth or Dare?"
>Oh, payback, got it.
>"I guess i'll go with truth" - Blondie
>"What's the most perverted thing YOU'VE ever done?"
>GLASSES NO

>WHAT ARE YOU DOING
>I THOUGHT I WAS SAFE
>I'm ready to bolt out the door again
>Glasses is just giving me the most taunting eyes possible.
>Blondie just kind of stares straight forward for a second lost
in thought

>Then i realize she's blushing pretty deeply
>she blurts out
>"I meant dare!, dare!"
>Birthday whispers into my ear that she's a fucking cheater.
>I agree, but i'm ok with it.
>Glasses doesn't miss a beat
>"Well you're wearing a bit much, how about losing your shirt?"
>Blondie realizes she's been caught between undressing in-front
of me
>Or admitting she was already undressed in front of me.

>She ends up giving a little "Hmph" and reaching down to her
waist and pulling her grey tank top over her head

>Delicious pert and gravity-defying breasts
>Encased in her lovely blue bra from earlier, but still.

>Well like i said, most of blondie's upper body was really
elegantly appealing.
>Even without her breasts being exposed there was plenty of
delicious eye candy.
>I was formulating plans in my head to kidnap her again and
remind myself of this.
>But i had already promised myself no more public shows of
attention, so even though i really wanted to stare at her, i
reeled it into courteous peeks just like i had been doing with
glasses.
>Next round
>Me, Homely, Birthday

>Birthday loses
>Me vs Homely
>No, must not lose
>3 Blocks
>Nobody down yet
>Four blocks
>Oh no its getting hairy
>Five blocks, homely picks every brick you can possibly move and
leaves absolutely nothing for me.
>Fuck
>I try for my first brick
>Tower on the ground in pieces
>Failed so hard the pile actually catches fire ):
>TIME FOR MY RECKONING
>She starts up innocently enough
>"Ohh... i don't know, who should i ask..."
>She's got one finger on her lips, i know she knows who she wants
and she's just being suspenseful.


>She points at me
>"Truth or Dare"

>Oh no
>I weigh the options
>Truth will probably fuck me over
>Dare homely will probably fuck me.
>I'm gonna go with truth, maybe ill do less damage and i can
always lie out of all the bad ones.
>"Truth"
>"Alright, i've got a good one for you" -Homely
>"Which girl do you like the most in this room, in a romantic
way?"
>FUCK
>All the girls in the room perk up
>NO NO NO NO NO
>THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT SHOULD NOT BE ASKED
>NO PUBLIC DISPLAYS OF AFFECTION OR I GET CASTRATED, I KNOW THE
RULES.
>I CAN'T PLAY FAVORITES, I CAN'T
>wait i got this
>"No i'm sorry i said Dare"

>Phew, i'm saved, there's nothing she can think of thats worse
than that.
>She's got no expression change on her face
>"Oh, i misheard you, I've got a perfect dare for you"
>I'm ready for it, give it to me straight boss
>"I dare you to...."
>"...Kiss the girl in this room you're most romantically
attracted to"
>NO

>TRUTH AND DARE WITH GIRLS
>NOT EVEN ONCE
>ABANDON ALL HOPE, MAN THE LIFEBOATS
>the captain's going down with this ship ):

>Im pretty sure that's got to be cheating
>There's a rule against that right?
>I'm looking around hopefully but all the girls are boring me
with eye-drills
>Oh god i gotta think about this logically
>Glasses doesn't like me going after Blondie, but i don't know
her opinion on Birthday
>Blondie would be crushed if i kiss anyone but her
>Birthday would be crushed if i kiss anyone but her.
>Fuck homely, i don't know what she was thinking but its
definitely not her.
>But hurting her feelings is a bad idea too.
>I can't win
>there's no winning
>it's all gone so wrong
>Pls time traveling anons, send help

>I've got one plan
>DELAY
>"I... it's an important decision, i need time to think"
>I say this with a sincere thoughtful face on
>Atleast i hope its a sincere thoughtful face and not the fear
and terror i had on the inside.
>The girls collapse into "Dawws" - Blondie

>and "Of course!" - Birthday
>I figure it's worked

>Of course i know who i would kiss, but they won't know that.
>I'm gonna go the route that doesn't involve suicide caused by
multiple homicides on me.
>I stand up and just... walk away
>I think i end up in the kitchen
>I'm not alone though
>I have two followers
>Birthday and Blondie
>They're giving me these looks
>The eyes man, they're just staring at me

>"You like me more right"
>"You're going to kiss me right?"
>"I'm your irl Waifu aren't i?"
>This is what those eyes were saying
>pls send help
>I book it out of there
>I turn the corner
>turn like six more corners to make sure i've lost them
>i might be doing laps of the living room
>i don't care
>I open the door to the bathroom and step in
>I close and lock the door
>I turn around

>Homely is standing there with her knees bent
>She's halfway to removing her pants and sitting down to use the
loo
>I meet her eyes
>she meets mine
>two seconds pass
>She continues pulling her pants down
>I FLIP A SHIT
>JUMP IN THE AIR, OPEN THE DOOR AND 360 NOSCOPE THE FUCK OUT OF
THERE
>Just doing continual moonwalk spins and headshotting people as i
exit the bathroom.
>I don't even know where i'm going
>I go around seven corners backwards and have over 15 confirmed
kills.
>I just go through a door and lock it.
>I am so done

>I turn around
>Oh its the guest room
>Raven is still curled up
>I walk over and place my hand on her head again.
>She's got her face scrunched up and is breathing softly.
>Fuck i wish homely hadn't said "This room"
>This would have been easy, i would have led them in here and
given raven a kiss on the cheek.
>Considering they know we were best friends and i had just pulled
her out of a burning building in the eyes of the group
>it would have been met with a group "Daww" and the dare would
have been over.
>Nobody would have been hurt, they wouldn't even be jealous
because raven would never know.
>It would be a cute secret crush, instead of an open admittance
of love over all the rest.
>BUT NO

>IF WAR IS WHAT HOMELY WANTS
>THAT'S WHAT SHE'S GOING TO GET
>I get off the bed and walk back to the door, going over the dare
in my head.
>I take one look back at raven, walk out and lightly close the
door as to not wake her.
>I put on my game face
>I return to the kitchen and find the two medusas staring me down
with eyes of petrification.
>I tell them i've made my choice.
>They follow me back to the area we were playing games.
>All of the girls look solemn
>Moment of truth is upon us
>I have them all sit down in a row.
>Im still shirtless mind you, and so is blondie and glasses.
>Homely looks rather embarrassed, i couldn't give a shit.
>She should lock the goddamn door.

>I tell them that i thought long and hard about my decision

>that the girl i'm going to pick is definitely the one that i
would like to be romantically involved in.

>I continue hyping it up like this

>I say that it's the most attractive woman in the room

>The most special

>The most mentally stimulating.

>These girls are in the palm of my hand

>Each one is imagining i've said all these nice things about them

>That i'm going to pick one of them up and romantically sweep
them off their feet.

>I've got them all riled into boiling and frothing pots of
hormones.

>Time to pick one.

>I kneel down infront of...

I think we need to have a vote on which girl i pick. The vote is
irrelevant but i'm curious.

Which pokemon should woody capture on his quest to catch them
all?

Votes  (From readers at the time, feel free to vote in comments
afterwards)
Blondie    : 7
Glasses   : 8
Homely    : 3
Birthday   : 1
Raven (not even an option tho)     : 5
Other things in the Room: 2 (Household Appliance/ My Hand)

>Glasses
>I'm quick about it too
>She can't even react as i lean in and press my lips against
hers.
>She's almost motionless at first
>She's probably absolutely terrified at what i've just done
>At the fact that i chose her over everyone else there
>I just keep kissing
>She opens up after ten seconds
>I can hear the sounds of every other girl in the room's heart
breaking.
>It's gone from just lips, to full french
>She still tastes a bit like whiskey, but its sweet and almost
lustful.
>I've got my tongue chasing hers across the valleys of teeth and
gums
>We're playing the breath game again
>I breathe out
>She breathes in
>She breathes out
>I breathe in.
>I get lost in her mouth, but i know it's getting time to end it.
>I pull back
>Her eyes are glimmering
>I've never seen her so happy
>Time to break her heart.

>I pull back and just leap at the next girl down the line.
>Its blondie
>She gives a surprised squeak, but is interrupted by my lips on
hers
>Electricity
>We still tumble backwards a bit
>She doesn't seem to know what to do, i just wrap one arm around
her lower back and just force her up against my chest
>Her breasts are pressing against me
>Her stomach muscles are fluttering against mine
>She's taking quick and short breaths, she doesn't know how to
play the breath game but it's alright.
>It's different.
>She tastes like whisky like glasses, but also somehow Maple
syrup still.
>Maybe she just usually tastes like maple syrup.
>Could be secretly canadian
>I'm lapping her up like a thirsty kitten though
>Her tongue doesn't know what to do, but eventually we fall back
into the rhythm we had earlier in the closet.
>Its close, less intimate than glasses and I ,but its different,
her body is different, her taste is different.
>She's giving little gaspy breaths all of a sudden.
>I realize i'm running my hand over her stomach and tickling her.
>oops
>i keep doing it.
>about a minute and a half into the kiss i pull away.

>On to the next victim
>Homely happens to be next down the line
>WELL HERE WE GO
>SUBMARINE READY
>WE'RE DIVING CAPTAIN
>My lips contact hers
>She's just as surprised as blondie was
>I guess she really wasn't expecting to be chosen at all.
>She's just lips gums and teeth though
>I don't know why she doesn't realize it but opening your mouth
is a thing you do when you're kissing
>She probably hasn't been kissed many times
>Poor homely
>Still though, the kiss is awful
>She tastes like coke and white bread
>Not the most appealing flavor
>I try my best to teach her to open up, but its no use
>After a minute and a half i just pull away
>I'm dead on the inside
>But she seems happy
>Whatever

>Last but not least
>She's sitting kinda far away
>I do a flying leap at Birthday
>I manage to tackle her to the ground in a way that doesn't
injure either of us
>Lips connect
>She's hot, her skin is burning compared to mine
>She also doesn't know how to kiss, but she's far better than
homely
>Salty, tad sour, her tongue seems to be the most flavorful part
>She's not very good with her mouth or her lungs, but she's all
over me with her hands
>I get hands on my back, she squeezes my butt, she's pressing
herself into me
>Without a doubt she's the most physical of the four
>She's even grinding against me and letting out soft moans
>I'm kind of embarrassed
>But i do my deed and cop a feel of her breasts anyway
>I make sure to use my left hand, so the group can't really see
what i'm doing since she's at the end of the line.
>But i definitely get a nice hard grasp and a rub of her breast.
>Glorious
>Somehow she gets one of her legs around mine and pulls me
upwards a little
>Ohmygod
>My hardened crotch brushes hers
>This is like the best shifting weight sensation ever
>Fucking amazing.
>She does it three more times as we continue kissing
>Eventually i have to pull back

>My little friend tries to stay, but he's attached to the rest of
me.
> ):

>I move backwards into a sitting position
>I'm completely out of breath, for very good reason

>I lean back mulling over the various kisses and the ups and
downs.
>All the girls are looking at me with various confused (homely),
amazed(glasses), angry(blondie), or just turned on(birthday)
faces.
>I'm categorizing the kisses in my head
>Glasses had the best kissing technique by far
>Blondie was the most exotic.
>Homely was the worst kiss.
>Birthday was the most physical.
>I'm kind of silently wishing raven were here so i could try hers
too
>But i take that back pretty quick, i'd want no part of her if
she was awake now.
>It's really no contest who was the most fun to kiss though.

>I stand up
>I put on my best shit-eating-grin
>My voice is full of nothing but true glee as i announce
>"I've fulfilled Homely's dare of kissing the one woman in the
room i would most like to be romantically involved with"
>"The rest of you just let me kiss you, who would have thought it
was that easy"
>This is the part where i start running
>I yell behind me "I'LL NEVER FORGET ANY OF THEM"
>I'm dodging pillows and half the jenga set flies by my face
>I'm writing this as i'm locked in the bathroom
>There's loud banging and i think they've got a battering ram.
>Time traveling anons pls send help.