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Disclaimer: If you are easily offended by blatant sexual stories, are under 18, or have a heart condition, don’t read this. If it is illegal in your state to possess this literature, then don’t possess. All within is pure fiction - I guess.

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Buck was stupefied to say the least. He had never expected to see me do this. Harassing me with the fear of an immediate castration had been meant to exercise my will. He wanted to let me have something that would work on my mind and force me to make the ultimate decision, but he had no idea I would do it so immediately.

Buck made a great effort to tell me that he wasn’t accepting my offer. He wanted to make sure I knew what I was doing was really of my own volition and not just a response to the intense fear he had just tormented me with earlier. I not only understood his reasoning, but I was glad to hear that what was going on between us was about more than him pimping me out and collecting my balls as a trophy. He was showing such a caring side towards me that I told him what I had been running from in my own mind for the last two days.

“I meant it, you know. But I do need time to get use to the idea. And besides, you haven’t really done all that much to deserve them yet.”

We sat there staring at each other for a few moments and then he told me he would take me home. I was happy to leave and even happier when we had to walk around the filming going on of the real trainee that this night was all about. He was already getting his hands restrained and I felt faint knowing he was only seconds away from seeing his own balls taken as a trophy.

I felt so much better the second we were back on the road. We drove in the dark and didn’t say a word to each other for the longest time. I had so much to say, but we had suddenly become so close that we were both intimidated by the unspoken. I had seen how humor had defused a heady subject earlier and decided to try to find some humor over the tragedy playing throughout my mind now. Nothing came to me at first, but when I saw a liquor store coming into view, I asked Buck to buy me some Tequila. When we stopped, I didn’t give any thought to how I was dressed anymore and followed him in. He did the thing about holding the door again and making me scoot under his arm. But this time it felt so different. I liked the attention being paid to me.

We walked around the store and a small boy with his mom came around the corner. I saw his eyes go from my slightly raised chest to my skirt, then back to my face. He was thoroughly confused and when his mom understood what she was also looking at, she grabbed his hand and walked away. I felt sorry for a young man in this world now. Would he someday go through the same thing I was at the moment?

I now understood how freakish I was looking and tried to hide my front side by browsing the aisles. I found myself in the accessories area and saw something that would lighten our moods so much. I thought about whether or not I should push the subject anymore, but if I didn’t face my fears now, it would probably be all that much harder later on. I picked up the gift box the item was in and found Buck in the next aisle. He had just found the Tequila and was picking the most expensive bottle for me. He saw the small wooden crate in my hand and asked me what it was, but I turned it away a little because I was still afraid to tell him anything else. I told him the price for it was twenty-five dollars and asked him if he would buy it for me. I was surprised to see no hesitation to say, “Sure!” and he went back to looking at the rows of bottles.

When he left, I followed him to the checkout. I watched him purposely try to avoid seeing what I had asked him to buy me and I was happy to see he saw I still had some identity. We drove all the way back to the house and I began preparing Buck some late supper. I was famished myself since I was told not to eat before meeting the Asian men. I found out the next day that it wasn’t a smart thing for a “girl” about to get poked to fill her colon.

Buck was happy to see I wasn’t pissed over what he had done to me and stood in the kitchen as I cooked him a steak with home fries. He casually talked about the Asian Occasion event and how he had so much film to edit into one cohesive porn flick. I glibly asked him what he thought about the extra money I had gotten them to pay for me. He grinned from ear to ear and told me how much he appreciated my extra effort. He also confessed how he had misgauged my visit to the chair and how sorry he was for doing it to me.

I hated the idea of looking at him, so I turned and hugged his chest without ever looking at him. I said, “It’s alright. I trust you and if that’s what you think I needed, then I had to see it. Thanks… for taking care of me.” I thought about the humor thing I had failed to induce yet and tried again. “I guess your friends got quite a kick out of seeing me screaming and begging like a little girl. I guess you get what you ask for, huh?”

I turned back and finished serving up his food. After he was served, I started on my own food, but he grabbed me to his lap and insisted I share his plate of food. I always felt so little on his lap, and when he began feeding me food, I felt like a school girl. It was a very slow meal, but it was nice to know how bad he felt over what I had gone through. He was even nice enough to not mention that part of the night at all. It didn’t come up until we sat on the couch to take straight shots of Tequila. I joked about needing a whole bottle to myself before I ever went to “that” room again. We spent a little time joking about things that had happened during the day and then I broke the real ice by telling him how badly he had scared me. It seemed so easy letting all the things I had felt pour out to him. When I saw he couldn’t feel much worse about what he had done to me, I decided to hit the nail on the head.

I went to the kitchen and got the little decorative wood gift box. I brought it to the couch and sat in a subservient manner at Buck’s feet and handed it to him.

I told him, “I know it’s not nice to ask you to buy a gift for yourself, but I wanted you to have this.”

He pulled the ribbon holding the box closed and opened the miniature crate. He looked at it and I saw he was a little more than perplexed. He wasn’t getting it. He took the two pieces out of the box and held then up to inspect them.

“It’s a decanter…” I said, “like for wine and brandy.”

“I don’t drink wine Sidney, but it’s nice looking.”

This man I had come to know as brilliant in manipulating people and figuring them out better than they could themselves, could be so dumb. I grabbed the decanter from him and showed him how the top locked on so it wouldn’t spill if tipped over. I showed him the clear bulb of the flask itself and how the slight reddish tint of the glass gave an awesome effect. I pointed out the etching on the top side that made the decanter a conversation piece. I walked over to the mantel and cleared a space in the center of it for the decanter and placed it there. Buck came up behind me and wanted to know if I was alright.

I replied with, “I saw this and thought… ‘This would be the perfect vessel’, and I think I was right.”

Buck was still puzzled over my odd behavior. He didn’t understand what was going on at all. I spelled it out for him.

“My balls… don’t you think my balls will look so good in here when I give them to you.” He was stunned that I had not only repeated my offer to let him have me as his trophy, but I had advanced the idea by buying a home for them. I continued by hugging him around the waist and saying, “I want you to have your trophy. I saw what it meant to all those men in the video. Take good care of me and you can have anything you want.
I turned to look into his eyes and said, “It’ll be a little while before I’m ready, but when you see this glass you can smile knowing that I already offer them to you.”

Buck was standing taller than he ever felt before. I was sure that he had never turned a trainee so fast, nor any of the other club members. I guess I was just as good a captive as he had first considered me. He finally asked me if there was anything he could give me in return. I thought for a moment and realized I needed him close to me, even in me.

“I’m still hungry. You could feed me.”

There was no missing the statement and he led me into the bedroom. We watched each other as we stripped off our own clothes. I shuddered with a small orgasm when I saw how hard he was for me. But there was still something in my head that refused to allow me to go to him. He pulled me between his legs and fell backwards onto the bed. I began by licking the underside of his balls and studying them closer than ever before. I needed to learn about them much more than I already had by just sucking on them. I jerked him slowly while lapping his testicles into a lather.

I decided to check out a suspicion I had about Buck, so I asked him to tell me about all the things the Asian men had done to me. It took him a while to loosen up, but soon I was seeing what really turned him on. It kept getting clearer to me as he told me about how I had been fucked repeatedly. Buck’s own little secret was becoming clear to me. He was a voyeur at heart and a self-destructive one at that. He liked the money I had made him, but it was so clear to me now that he greatly enjoyed knowing other men were taking advantage of me. When I realized that, I decided to tell him about his buyer Brian and what he had done to me. Between licking his balls and stroking his cock, I began telling him the details of how things had progressed between us.

Buck never sought to stop my oration and his cock was harder than I ever felt. I was driving him mad over what had happened to me. But, it occurred to me that I had something better to offer him. I had finally remembered the tape I had made when Brian was with me. I went over to the camera and retrieved the memory chip, and placed it into the computer. I was telling Buck how I had turned on the camera and then forgot about it. I started the proper file and went back between Buck’s legs to finish him off while he watched what his buyer put me through. As things heated up on the tape and I heard my voice growing concerned, I knew it was at the point that Brian was about to fuck my throat. I didn’t remember the slight skirmish we had while Brian got my head into position for him. Buck became uncontrollable and I felt like I had a moving target. He enjoyed watching me be abused so much that he had went from a nice leisurely blowjob to needing to shoot like a cannon.

I wanted to swallow his cum this time and rammed my throat into place for him. I knew his reactions so well that I could tell he was ready to explode and fought to keep from jerking away from him. Thankfully, his hands instinctively held the back of my head and I felt him begin feeding me. I held still for him while he continued watching the tape and emptying his nuts in me. Even as I was trying to gulp down my second meal I was taking note of how intensely Buck was reacting to my abuse. He had a dark side to him even more hidden than the tranny club.

I woke up with the sun in my eyes and saw Buck was editing all the raw footage from the day before. He appeared to have quite a knack for making it look effortless. I saw some of the raw scenes as he cut them and the one that really caught my eye was very telling. Just as the men were considering themselves done with me, a final man was holding my head sideways as I was lying face down on the round table. He was obviously cumming in my mouth and groaning slurs at me in his native language. I saw him slap the side of my face a couple of times and I assumed he was referring to me as a good whore.

The men were leaving the room after thanking Buck and in a moment I saw Buck come over next to me. At first I thought he had used my mouth for himself, but then I saw he was actually wiping my mouth out. He was trying to get the last man’s sperm out of my mouth for me. Such a caring act doesn’t come from an unfeeling person. I remembered giving him my body parts as a trophy and felt a whole lot better about doing that now.

When Buck caught on that I was awake, he played the movie for me, fully edited. I watched as the moment I was getting groggy, the men went into almost a feeding frenzy with me. I thought I had been abused on the table first, but evidently I was going in and out of unconsciousness. The men actually started by surrounding me on the king sized bed and were ripping my clothes off me, sticking their cocks to and in my mouth, and one man was lifting my legs in an attempt to fuck me.

It was close to forty minutes of very rape-like assaults on me. I saw that they tried laying me on every piece of furniture to test their comfort. It was interesting that as rough as they were to me during sex acts, they handled me with kid gloves as they moved me and positioned my body for their use. Several shots were of my face close up while I was getting bumped forward during a fuck and it was intriguing even to me how I wasn’t reacting at all. All these men wanted was a warm body that couldn’t belittle them, or fight them.

When the movie ended, I complimented Buck on his efforts. I began asking him if he thought it was going to be worth much and he told me that he would know in a few hours. We were going to deliver the first copy to the same men that starred in the making of it. I wasn’t sure how I would face them after seeing what they did to me. I was told that he expected to get another seven or eight hundred for the taping of their party with me. He told me how this was what made the Asian series so profitable. He could tell there was something on my mind and asked me what was wrong.

Slowly, I asked him the question bugging me. “Did you… you know? Did you… do anything to me while I was out?”

He smiled and told me he had thought about it, but it didn’t seem right. I was glad that he said it that way, so I rubbed up against him and told him that maybe when things got boring that maybe he could slip me something just for his benefit. If I was going to trust him with stealing away with my manhood, I certainly had to trust him with this. I did tell him that I expected him to tape it so I could be sure he had a good time with me.

The air was lightening up between us and I was almost feeling like part of a team; us against them. It felt nice being a part of something. I began kidding Buck about me being a star now and how I was going to require a lot of pampering. For the first time we were messing around and laughing together. I knew a lot of it was because I had first allowed a very dangerous movie to be made, but then, knowing that your trainee has offered his most precious testicles to you for nothing more than an award borne a certain intimacy.

Buck went out to the living room and after untangling my chain I followed him. There he was standing in front of the mantel, staring at the decanter he bought for me the night before. When he saw me watching him, he smiled and told me he couldn’t wait to see the glass full. I don’t know what came over me, but I grew devilish and asked him if he wanted to see what it would look like. I asked him to get one of his many cameras and while he was gone, I filled the decanter most of the way with water. When he came back, I doffed my panties, held the decanter under my balls and sunk them into the liquid. Buck smiled and took several shots of me like that; close up of course.

After the pictures were properly toyed with on the computer, he made it really look like my nuts sat in the glass by themselves. He felt more comfortable now and grabbed my balls and played with them rather roughly. I knew he was thinking horrible things, but they were going to be his eventually, most likely, perhaps someday; so I pushed back into his hand.

Buck didn’t stop talking about my offering to him the whole day and I was soon beginning to believe that in some sick way that he really did deserve to win my balls to cut off as a trophy. It has to sound strange that I would think of allowing another man to mutilate me for his own glorification, but realistically, this was really the only thing a guy in my position had to offer. When I dried the decanter and put it back onto the mantel, I stared at it for a moment and envisioned my parts before my eyes and grew so faint that I nearly fell over. I was still a long way from doing the deed, but it was titillating thinking about what it would take to commit fully to it.

Buck caught me staring at the glass and asked me for a reasonable time frame as to when he could expect to see the glass full. I dropped my head and thought for a moment. I told him at least a couple of months and all he said was to make sure I was ready for it when the time came for it to happen.

“How long are you going to keep them?” I asked and then, “How much do you think we can sell them for?”

I saw him giving it just as much thought and asked, “Which way are you going to lose them?”

I had forgotten that there were two ways and it occurred to me that he was really asking if I was going all the way in my gender change or if I was going to stay a tranny. After a lot of thought, I told him the truth.

“Honestly, the way I saw seems… the most acceptable way. You know, one clean cut and it’s over. Watching them fall away from that girl was so… it was just unbelievable. And I guess they would look better in a jar that way. But I wouldn’t have enough material to make that pocket you were talking about. I guess… maybe I should just leave that up to you. So, how much do you think?”

He grabbed his jaw and said that he expected at least five to six thousand for the balls themselves, and another three to four thousand for the movie of it being done to me. He added that if I took the latter method that he wasn’t too sure. We joked about how they wouldn’t look as fascinating there in a jar without the scrotum to make their appearance extremely obvious.

I asked him, “Have you watched many guys getting castrated? Are their owners always that jubilant and belligerent?”

“You have to understand, they’re not pissing on their property. Yeah, they celebrate and make sure the guy knows exactly why he got cut. And that some pervert is going to be prizing the ownership of some actual guys’ balls. But when they get home, that kid will be praised and babied to no end. He’ll get every request met because his owner will know he can trust a boy that gives him the hardest thing in the world for a guy to give up.” He stared me down and asked me again, “You really want to cut your balls off just to give them to me?”

I thought for a moment and nodded my head. It was still too hard to admit it out loud unless it was in a joking manner. I added, “I thought buying the glass for them would prove that to you.” I had been avoiding a huge question, but I couldn’t put it to the sideline any longer. “How long would you keep them before selling them to a collector?”

He gave it serious thought and told me that they usually leave the room with the collector, but sometimes an owner would hold them for a few days to drive up the price. He said he would probably want them on his own mantel for a while and grabbed my balls right then. Again I allowed him to play with them very roughly. I still the holder of them, but I was trying to get my mind prepared by considering them as his already.

I could tell he had something to tell me and then he just smirked and told me that he had just decided to get me appraised. He went on to tell me that he was going to take me to a collector tonight to have him make an offer for my family jewels. I found that very intimidating, but there was something oddly attractive to me about being appraised for the value of my testicles. I started right then on a plan to drive up the price as high as I could. I just couldn’t believe the flighty way I was acting at getting castrated. I think the one thing that Buck pointed out to me that really held the most weight of all the information I had heard was that the testicles were sold for a couple of reasons. The real trophy was the castrated tranny, and getting permission to sell their balls to someone else was in the spirit that they were given to the owner as property to dispose of in what ever manner made him happy.

Hearing the way he talked about the whole thing made a lot of sense to me. But there was still a part of me that wanted mine to stay close to me. That was something I would have to think about a lot. Would it be some kind of a thrill to know that whenever a collector showed off his trophies that my actual testicles would be what they would see? The leaking I could feel myself doing was enough to answer that question.

Since everything seemed so light hearted at the moment, I decided to find out if I was right about Buck’s secret. “You like watching other men… do things to me. Don’t you?”

Buck seemed a little annoyed with the question, but it was truth time and he admitted that he got a certain thrill out of seeing others enjoy what he considered his.

I asked in a very naïve way, “You really consider me your property?”

“That bother you?”

I suddenly felt so feminine and replied with, “No, it’s kinda hot actually.” I was getting horny and so I needed to explore this further. “Am I worth the trouble I’ve been to you?”

Buck thought it was funny that I would consider any part of his hobby as troublesome. It was amazing to me that after such a terrifying day as yesterday had been, it had brought Buck and I a lot closer together. I was starting to understand him and he was definitely getting from me whatever he wanted.

For some reason, I couldn’t stop talking about castration, my castration, what my balls meant to me, and what it would be like to see my own testicles dropped into a jar of formaldehyde. I found myself trying to tell Buck all the pros and cons of what he wanted from me, but the thing I couldn’t get out of my head was meeting a collector. I knew I would have to see the specimens he already had and hear how he talked about them. I pictured him pulling my pants down to appraise me like a rare stone and those thoughts were keeping me both horny and wet all day.

I guess I was beginning to bug Buck because he told me he was going to take me to get appraised in a half hour and told me to pretty up my sack to show it off. I showered and put on a pair of shorts, and had to pry my eyes away from the mirror when I caught a glimpse of my chest in profile. My boobs were indeed growing. They were quickly becoming very taut and cone shaped. I was about to replace my dog collar when I saw myself in the mirror. I almost asked to go without it, but since I knew how proud Buck was at showing me off, I placed it around my neck and snapped the lock closed on it.

When I left the bathroom, I went to the kitchen closet and took out the rope I had seen there. I cut off a six foot section and worked one end of it into my collars tether ring. Buck came over to see what I was doing and I handed him the other end of it. I just put myself on a leash for him. When I saw a moment of heat in his eyes, I asked him, “Would you like to see me with the collector?”

I could tell by his eyes that I had just done a little taunting of my own and tucked that info away. I had expected that we were going directly to the collector’s house, but when he grabbed the cd he had made of me, I realized we were going to meet with the men from yesterday first. It was another long drive and since the sun was streaming into the van, I was even more self-conscious about my dress and looks. My greatest fear in the world at that moment was getting stopped by a cop.

About ten minutes away from the hotel, Buck called the men and told him he was on the way. I told Buck that I had severe apprehension on having to walk into the hotel, leash and collar at that. He seemed willing to compromise. When we pulled into the parking lot, he called them again and told them to come to the parking lot.

A few minutes later, three of the men that had abused me were approaching the van and I was told to get into the back. Buck got out and slid the door back and allowed the men to grab at me a little. They were beside themselves to see me on a leash attached to a thick dog collar. I hadn’t known that unlike the sex, the price of the tape was still negotiable. The men offered four hundred for it at first and Buck scoffed. The hands reaching in to grab at my body parts were torn between having a memory of their debauchery with me and getting another quick thrill. When I grew afraid that my efforts to earn Buck the money he had worked so hard for was slipping away, I jumped into the fray.

“Come on guys, remember all those nasty things you did to me last night? Don’t you want a souvenir? You could always make copies and sell them to get your money back.” I could see I had them thinking and set the price. “Buck needs to get fifteen hundred for the CD. That’s only three hundred a piece to get to relive what you did to me over and over.” Again I saw I was getting to them, so I offered them sort of a coupon. “And if you buy the cd now, I’ll always be available to you in the future.”

The men began haggling in earnest and when I saw Buck would be happy with the eleven hundred they offered, I started grabbing the hands feeling me up and begging them to go higher. I pulled one of the men into the van with me and started opening his pants. He tried to stop me and was suddenly concerned with being found out, but I worked my way to his cock and immediately began fellating him. I was surprised at how small the man was, but he was as stiff as if he had a bone in his cock. The other two men were sexual charged again as well, as they watched me fighting to force a blowjob onto their friend. The offer went up a hundred at a time until they finally agreed to the fifteen hundred.

The man I was sucking on grew extremely afraid that someone would see what we were doing and finally yanked away from me. The wallets came out and a flurry of excited talk began in native tongue. I crawled back into the front and soon we were back on the road. Buck complimented me on my effort and reiterated that he had only planned on eight hundred at the most. I fought off smiling and merely replied with, “I’m worth more to you than that, aren’t I?”

On the way to his friend’s house I was told that the guy I was about to meet had the largest collection of anyone he had ever met, but that he knew of at least six men that had some kids’ balls in a jar someplace in their home. Then he mentioned how there were many more buyers to be found on the internet. I asked him if I could know how long he had been doing this to guys and how many might have gone through the club in total. When he told me, I knew he was really trusting me. The club was formed eight years earlier and the club was responsible for presenting the world with over forty tranny’s, in one form or another. Few ever fought to the end to keep their balls. I was amazed to hear that only three men ever opted for their early release and felt better that I was in the larger group. I found it hard to believe that that many young males had been put through their gender changing machine without any complaints to the cops. These owners really had set things up pretty well.

Buck tossed the hood to me and told me to put it on. I did as asked and within a minute or two, we were pulling to a stop. I waited for Buck to come around and get me, and then I was led into the house by my lead rope. The collector was introduced to me as Bruno and when Buck got my hood off, I shook his hand. His hand immediately went to my balls and fondled me extensively. I pushed my pelvis forward and allowed him free access to me. Buck was entranced with seeing me get felt up. Bruno wasn’t saying much; just humming and hawing over what he was feeling. Finally he spoke up and just as fast, I was as horny as ever.

Bruno asked, “So, this is your newest toy. Has she been obedient for you? I’ve never been asked for an appraisal before. This should be very interesting.”

Buck asked him to show me where he kept his trophies and he led us to a rear room in his house. It had a huge fireplace and a mantel about twelve feet long. I couldn’t help but notice all the glass jars on display. I counted seven and shivered from the brutal reality of what they represented. Bruno took one down and I got my first close up look at a real mans’ balls, castrated balls that is. The scrotum was covering the testicles as if they had been severed that day. He told us what tranny had giving them up so that he was lucky enough to acquire them. He bragged about getting them for a mere thirty-three hundred dollars and how the donor was long gone from the area. Just before moving to the west coast he had come by to take a last look at what he had given up for his owner.

Bruno told me that he had never met any tranny that had second thoughts about what they had done. He was glad, because he really looked fondly over his collection of human testicles. I kidded him that they would probably cost a lot less at a morgue, but he went off on a three minute tirade over how a dead man’s balls were worthless. What made his collection so valuable to him was knowing the mental anguish each boy went through before giving them to another man. And to understand that they would be resold to a perfect stranger held even more appeal to him. He told Buck that he had bought a German film of a guy getting “fixed” and asked if we’d like to see it. After looking at all the severed testicles, I was too freaked out to watch and luckily Buck picked up on that.

The subject was changed to my balls and what they might be worth to him. I was told to drop my shorts and did so. The men were happy to see that I hadn’t worn any panties and Bruno’s hand went for my sack. He pulled them out and away from my body, rolled them in his fingers, but never took is eyes off mine. I knew what didn’t go in a jar had a lot to do with what they were worth.

At first Bruno said that because I had shaved so recently, that he would only offer Buck two thousand for the “pair” and only if I let him collect them right then. I felt ever so slighted and pushed into his hand to encourage another offer. He said he might offer three if I gave them up right then.

I asked, “What could I do to make them worth more to you? What would make them more valuable?”

He told me he preferred hair on them long enough to distinguish them as coming from a grownup and that his most valuable set was because of the way they were collected. Plus he had the film of them being taken. He said that the wilder the images were of the castration, that the more collectable they became. His most valued trophy had come from a willing tranny, but the owner from that particular club had sent him off with a couple of bikers and a doctor to cut them off. That had left the donor fearful and feeling disowned, yet he had never flinched in his desire to hand them over. The kid hadn’t been prepared to lose them the way he had and thus his reactions made his trophy balls worth over ten thousand dollars to him. That included the exclusive film though.

With his hands still on my balls, I grabbed his and told him I could get pretty freaky. I asked him if my nuts would be appraised higher if the tape made it look totally involuntary. He said ‘no’ and that there had to be the offering of them to make them worth so much. I saw Buck watching his hands rubbing my balls and I decided to give it one more try.

“What,” I asked, “would mine go up to in value if I was to service you a lot before you got them. Like, once a week maybe. It would almost be like claiming you had been offered them directly from their owner. I could see his cock push suddenly against his pants and that caused me to react. I tugged my balls out of his grip as I went to my knees and reached to feel his hardon. The men talked about me as though I wasn’t there and I began fellating an actual collector of human testicles. I worked him over thoroughly as they talked about my newly acquired abilities, and when I was sure he was about to cum, I promptly stood up.

Bruno got pissed that I had teased him and I held my hand out and told him I could finish him for a twenty. He only had eight bucks on him, so to seem like I wasn’t trying to let him off cheap, I said, “Then I’m only going to swallow eight bucks worth of stuff then.”

I took the money and held it in my hand as I went back to work on him. The men’s topic turned to my ability to make Buck a lot of money and he began telling the collector some of the things I had done already. Before I knew it, Bruno was filling my mouth with his cum. I hadn’t timed things well, so I struggled to hold it all in my mouth. When I stood up, I went over to the wastebasket and slowly allowed what I figured to be two thirds of his sperm drool out of my mouth. I went back to Bruno, opened my mouth and talked around his juice, “This is eight bucks worth.” I swallowed it down and I could see Buck was amazed that I had been able to do that without anyone forcing me. I handed Buck his money and watched him tuck it into his shirt pocket.

Bruno grabbed onto my collar and called me a “feisty one”. His other hand went back to feel my balls again. I was quickly realizing that my balls were becoming anyone’s but mine and thus I was pushing them into any hand that cared to grope on them. I had to be going crazy because I had fallen so far so quickly. Just a few days ago the mere talk of someone getting castrated was enough to make me ill, but now I was intertwined in a bevy of situations, any of which could end up with me as an eunuch. Something told me that latching onto Buck was my best hope for getting through this phase of my life.

I came back to the men’s conversation to hear Bruno changing his bid to forty-five hundred to have my balls on his mantel. But he still insisted on taking them himself and tonight. I flashed back to the castration chair and what it had felt like with that steel cage clamping off the blood flow to my sack and nuts. The terror of watching the knife seemingly cutting through my scrotum was an image that I was sure would never leave my memory. I half listened to the men haggling over the amount being offered to sheer away the very sack I was wondering about at the moment. Would I ever need them again?

The next thing I heard was Bruno telling Buck that he ought to make me responsible for selling my own balls. He considered that the truly ultimate degradation and that I should do it for my owner if I were properly trained.

“What do you think we’re doing here now,” I asked. “But you’re not even in the ballpark. My balls aren’t coming off until I get twenty thousand for Buck. That includes the film of them coming off. What do you say? Twenty thousand and you can have my testicles to brag about to your friends.”

I watched the men both raise their eyebrows at my outright offer. Bruno praised Buck for having trained me so well and told him that he was afraid he couldn’t afford me as his next trophy for his mantel. I lifted one of the jars and inspected the testicles it held. I wondered what the man that offered them up had to go through and if I would ever meet him.

I stated coolly, “You have such a nice collection, but I’m afraid mine will never join them. Too bad, you seem like a nice man and would have taken good care of them for me.”

Once on the road home, Buck was full of praises for my actions and thought it was hysterical the way I had taken control of a collector so easily. He was sure Bruno was already on the phone telling another collector what he had just witnessed.

When we got home I looked at the empty decanter and wondered what would become of me after I left Buck. Where would I go and what would I do as a non-specific gender? I asked Buck what he thought would happen to me and where would I be a year or two down the road. That was when I found out that there were many past recruits that helped trannys adapt to their new lives, and they were all over the country. He also told me that most new trannys would go nuts with their newfound freedom and had no trouble staying happy. I looked at the glass again, pictured it as the safe keeper of my gift to Buck, and wondered if I would ever see them again after I broke Buck’s hold over me. Suddenly, my worst fear seemed much worse than just offing a body part for my owner.

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