--------------------------------------------------------- Sex pervert seeks help --------------------------------------------------------- --------------------- *Captives *LetÕs Talk About Sex *Run Lola Run *Cleopatra 2525 *Sabrina *The Limey *Madeline *The Pen and Ink Club -------------------- Dear holy joe, I have a problem. IÕm only sexually attracted to little girls. What should I do? Steve in Seattle Dear Steve, Yours is a hopeless case. My recommendation is that you should force yourself to like women. Recently I put on gloves and a gas mask and went up to a woman and forced myself to attempt to speak to her. I asked her if she wanted to go on a date. Unfortunately she said no, so IÕm still dateless. I explained to her that I did not want to smell or touch her, that I would be polite and keep my hands to myself and pay for my half of the date, that I was trying to cure myself of a perverse sexual interest in little girls. But she rejected me, despite my willingness to pay for myself. I suppose she was actually bargaining with me, trying to get me to pick up the tab for herself as well as for me. But I mean, heck, itÕs not like sheÕs a little girl or anything! SheÕs a working woman! She should be able to pay her own bills. But tomorrow I am going to try asking a woman again. My advice is that you try doing the same. You can get a gas mask at any army surplus store. Tell the guy behind the counter youÕre going to see a woman and hopefully heÕll give you a discount. DonÕt let him talk you out of it though. Then get some gloves, either medical supply store gloves or even just plain gardening gloves. Then go find a woman! Explain your purpose. Be willing, as I am going to be, to pay for everything, even though itÕs obviously freeloading. Tell her how she will be saving the government and herself money by letting you pay to cure yourself, instead of waiting for you to get arrested. IÕm sure if you explain to her how much you like little girls, and how disinterested you are in women (heck letÕs be honest here, weÕre not wearing gloves and a gas mask for nothing!) she will show some consideration for your plight. Hopefully she will let you take her out. You wonÕt even have to worry about her getting the hots for you and trying to make out with you since, with your gloves and gas mask on, youÕll have full protection no matter what happens! (Oh yeah, wear a condom too just in case you Ôget luckyÕ or, in our case, unlucky.) I know some guys say ÒPut a bag over her headÓ but with a mask on yours, it shouldnÕt be too bad. Just shut your eyes and you will have the same effect as a bag would provide. Now of course the next question comes: If this woman gets the hots for you, what about marriage? I recommend it. Getting married means you will probably have children and, who knows? You might have daughters. Cute daughters, in fact. Then you will be with cute little girls all the time, at least until they grow up. Society will be happy, you will be a productively married citizen. You will be happy, since youÕll be around cute little girls all day! So you see, it can all work out in the end. In fact, if you get married and have children who are little girls, they will probably have little girlfriends. Then you will have not only your own little girls around, but other peopleÕs little girls around too! Society knows what is best for us, after all. We perverts should not be so resistant. We should let things happen the way society wants. Imagine yourself, right now, dateless, trying to become a girl scout leader or, better yet, a leader of brownies. Impossible. But as a married father, heck, theyÕll probably ask you to be a girl scout leader. And a soccer coach, and God knows what else. Tell them you worked briefly for the Bolshoi Ballet and they might even let you be with all those cute little girls one sees going to ballet class! I think at some point in her life every elementary school girl dreams of being a ballerina. You might be saturated with little girls, all of them clamoring for your attention, begging you to please teach them ballet, wearing their cute little ballerina outfits and walking around very delicately on their tip toes. Excuse me, IÕm starting to get hot flashes, thinking of little girls. I must adjust my thoughts. Recently I did actually see a woman I liked, believe it or not. I feel like giving myself a gold star (or maybe a cheerleader magazine) for actually finding a woman in this world that I felt a sexual response toward. Her name is Julia Ormond, and I saw her the other day in a BBC movie called ÒCaptivesÓ. ItÕs a love story. Julia plays a new young dentist whose husband has an affair, so she decides to get revenge by dumping him and going to work (as a dentist) in a prison. Naturally while there, among all the rapists, child molesters and other fine members of our society, suffering under feminist persecution for their desires, she meets a prisoner and falls in love with him. I would be giving away the plot to say what heÕs ÒguiltyÓ of. But this woman, who actually looks like a tall young girl, with her hair in a long loose ponytail and her awesomely cute face, has many sexual trysts with him, all while trying to avoid letting her supervisors find out that sheÕs fallen in love with a prisoner. Another movie I saw recently is called ÒLetÕs Talk About Sex.Ó ItÕs about three women. One of them gets a new boyfriend and over lunch, one of her girlfriends says, of her new boyfriend, ÒThis one actually has pubic hair.Ó My heart went out to this 20-something woman when I heard her friend say that. Imagine, a woman who not only understands under-age sexual desires, but actually has a little boyfriend of her own! ÒRun Lola RunÓ is another movie I saw recently. It stars a girl whoÕs trying to save her boyfriend. HeÕs planning to rob a store to get himself out of trouble with the mob. ÒRun Lola RunÓ is a German film, but donÕt be put off by the subtitles. ItÕs one of the best movies IÕve seen. The story is told and then re-told, in various ways. It does get slightly tedious at times but the music is great, and I liked seeing LolaÕs fat little ass as she runs down the street trying to save her boyfriend. What is really great about this film are the various optional endings the film provides. They have an accidental real-life quality to them. I also liked the filmÕs ruthlessness. Lola doesnÕt pull any punches as she attempts to save her boyfriend. She is a crazy, admirably screwed-up young woman with spiked hair, dyed red, who will do what her youthful impulses tell her she must, no matter what the consequences. She truly lives for today, and tomorrow will probably wind up with a bullet through it. Falling into the category of Òso bad itÕs goodÓ may be the show Cleopatra 2525. Do you have memories of a 1960Õs T.V. super hero called Astro Boy? This was a cartoon boy whose feet could turn into jet engines, propelling him through the air. He wore two forearm-length wristbands which, if he touched them (with his other hand), shot laser beams. Imagine three CharlieÕs Angels type women in a live action T.V. show doing this. Imagine the 1970Õs song, ÒIn the year 2525, will mankind survive?Ó turned into a feminist anthem: ÒIn the year 2525, three women fight to survive.Ó Imagine it sung by a black woman. In a move which no doubt thrilled Marvel ComicsÕ legal department, these three women can also shoot Òspider stuffÓ out of their wristbands, and swing through the air like Spider Man. So we have the elements of Cleopatra 2525, which, borrowing its star from Egyptian history, then proceeds to steal from everything else: The God/Satan rivalry. ÒThe Voice,Ó ala Star WarsÕ Òthe Force,Ó except that here the Voice materializes as an older woman. The ÒSatan as trickster and rebelÓ motif, with Satan in the guise of a figure dressed like BatmanÕs Joker. The Japanimation concept of a naive, inexperienced young female (Cleo) paired with older, more experienced friends. The Star Wars/Battlestar Galactica concept of Imperial Storm Troopers or Cylons running rampant (with the Devil/Joker figure leading them like Darth Vader). The Total Recall concept of a projected double, which means the Devil/Joker/Vader figure merely reverberates, but doesnÕt die, when a laser blast makes a direct hit on his body. The Level 9/THX 1138 concept of a future Earth in which the surviving humans have been driven underground. The Fly, featuring Cleo in bug-eye goggles and giant marauding Spider-like flies. Kung Fu, with the women performing acrobatic feats to escape laser blasts. About the only thing this show doesnÕt rip off is Dune. But IÕm sure theyÕll remember Dune eventually. As you may have guessed, the young women are dressed in bikinis. The demographics for Cleopatra must be an advertiserÕs dream: 1. Geeky ÒadultÓ males who can be counted on to buy the latest Star Wars doll but not underarm deodorant. 2. Ten-year-old boys who canÕt get hold of dadÕs Penthouse. 3. Girls aged eight and under who believe theyÕre going to grow up to be Cinderella and marry a pirate. Plus this group: 4. Men whose wives forbid them to buy or watch Playboy but will grudgingly put up with their watching three bikini-clad women, provided there is a Òscience fictionÓ pretext that the men can point to for wanting to watch the show. In my opinion, the Astro Boy armbands, which looked fine on Astro Boy, are utterly ridiculous on the three women. This is the silliest concept of the show, and severely reduces what audience it could have. Next is the concept (however realized) of flying jet-engine feet. Perhaps the women are only able to fly in their underground habitat, but it still looks embarrassingly ridiculous. The spider-web shooting is almost as bad, but we are running out of a show here if we eliminate that. The Joker villain is probably the best part of the show. I enjoyed watching him lead his troops in room-to-room warfare, with them dying like flies while direct hits on his own body pass harmlessly through him, having a visually interesting shuddering effect on his (projected) body. Cleopatra 2525 would be more credible if the females in the show were not adult women but three girls, ages 9 to 12. These characters are hopelessly idealistic. You could get away with young girls behaving like this, but itÕs impossible to believe grown women would behave this way. But then who would want to watch three little girls in bikinis, particularly wet string bikinis like I would put them in? ÒI was nine-years-old, and you had your arms around me because you were teaching me to skate backwards. And suddenly you kissed me.Ó -Sabrina I have found another golden-age starlet, similar to 1938Õs Bonita Granville in Beloved Brat. ItÕs Audrey Hepburn, in the 1954 film Sabrina. This film deals with the same issues as Lolita, except the girl is slightly older. A teenage girl returns from finishing school in Paris. She returns to the house where she grew up, meeting once more the middle-aged man who owns the house where she lived as a child. Except now, since sheÕs a Òyoung ladyÓ, itÕs socially acceptable for her to have an affair with him. IÕll leave the plot at that; to say more would give away too much. As you can imagine I was delighted with this film. Not only is the concept of a man kissing a nine-year-old girl completely in line with my pedophile values, but Audrey Hepburn is so beautiful it hurts. I have memories of people saying Brooke Shields looked like Audrey Hepburn. But having no idea who Audrey was, the comparison was meaningless to me. If you like (or liked, when she was 12) Brooke Shields, you will love Audrey Hepburn. Interestingly, IÕve learned that Sabrina was remade in 1995, starring Harrison Ford and Julia Ormond! Well, thatÕs all the advice I can give about women, and about women in films. Unfortunately I havenÕt seen any new cute little girls this week. But as you stated in your letter, youÕre trying to overcome your sexual lust for little girls, so itÕs probably best that I didnÕt see any. By the way right now IÕm taping a film called ÒThe Limey,Ó which apparently features two cute girls, one older and one younger. We shall have to wait for another time for my report on that film. So long, Steven! And if youÕre looking for Madeline on the Disney Channel, it now comes on at 6 a.m. Eastern time. I guess theyÕre hoping to show those cute little French girls when us perverts are asleep. But a good thing about the new time is that ÒThe Pen and Ink ClubÓ comes on before Madeline. ItÕs an hour of wonderful old Donald Duck-type cartoons, which canÕt be seen on the Disney Channel at any other time of day. So if youÕre willing to get up early, or set your VCR, you can tape not only high- quality traditional Disney cartoons, but Madeline too! 30 --------------------------- Dreamgirls! ------------------------ -- More stories at: http://www.deja.com/ Search by typing: roller666@earthlink.net Click on ÒPower SearchÓ Change ÒstandardÓ archive to ÒcompleteÓ archive. -- Other providers: Eli the Bearded: http://www.netusa.net/~eli/erotica/assm/ ArtÕs Erotic Stories and Photos: http://www.eroticstories.com AnyaÕs LilÕ Hideaway: http://www.insatiable.net/ Silver: http://www.mr-yellow.com/goodies Usenet Newsgroup: alt.sex.stories.moderated -- Great books by David Hamilton and Jock Sturges are at: http://www.amazon.com http://bn.com (art photos of naked girls) -- Naked girls/politics: http://www.AlessandraSmile.com Man/boy love: http://www.nambla.de Politics: http://www.lp.org -- Naughty Naked Dreamgirls (Library of Congress ISSN: 1070-1427) is copyright 2001 by Andrew Roller. 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