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Andrew Roller Presents
NAUGHTY NAKED DREAMGIRLS
in
BIKINI BRIGADE
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Chapter Ten
Tommy lay in the grass. He had manged to get quite close to the
eclair. It was the same eclair heÕd ridden before. It was quite a little
eclair, he thought, and he was a big troll. Maybe he wasnÕt big like a
person, but he was big for a troll, and Tommy was mad at the eclair for
dumping him in the Soda Sea. Not that Tommy had asked the eclair for a
ride, of course. But then a troll shouldnÕt have to ask for something. It
should just be given to him. Whatever a troll wanted a troll should get.
That was TommyÕs opinion, anyhow. And what Tommy wanted now was a
target.
Tommy raised his two guns. They were long and sleek, with well-
polished barrels. He pointed them at the eclair. He pulled their triggers.
To his great delight, long sprays of marshmellow goo shot out of the guns.
They hit the eclair. It let out a fearful whinny and rose, with some
difficulty, into the sky. White goo was spread all along its side. The goo
weighed it down. It gave small, terrified yelps as it tried to free itself
from the goo and fly properly.
ÒHa! Ha! Ha!Ó Tommy laughed. He stood up in the grass. ÒThat will
teach you, eclair!Ó Tommy yelled. ÒIÕd better not see you feeding near my
swamp ever again!Ó He turned and walked into a grove of cypress. He
walked along the bank of his marshmellow marsh. ÒIÕm Tommy the Troll,Ó
Tommy said happily to himself. He swung his guns on his hands. ÒTommy
the big, important troll!Ó And then he sang a song,
ÒOh, IÕm big, bad Tommy the troll!
Do you think me droll?
Then IÕll shoot you right through to your soul
Because IÕm big, bad Tommy the troll.
The very terrible troll!Ó
Just then there was a crashing sound behind Tommy. He whirled
about, only to see the eclair heÕd just shot smashing its way down through
the trees. Furious, still laden with cream, the eclair attacked Tommy. It
was like being hit with a big flying log. The eclair hit Tommy from behind
and sent him flying. Tommy lost hold of his guns. The eclair caught them
as they spiraled out ahead of it, through the air. Tommy fell into the
marshmellow swamp nearby. But the eclair managed to catch TommyÕs
guns with its big pee hole. It rose swiftly up through the trees, clutching
them in its mouth.
ÒCurses! My guns! Come back here with my guns!Ó Tommy wailed to
the eclair. Then he sank deeper into the muck of the marshmellow marsh,
and his last words, blurted out to the escaping eclair, were ÒBLUB!Ó
ÒWell, itÕs nice to be in civilization again,Ó Matilda Brunswald said
to the little old woman. Her name was Peanut Brittle Polly. She owned a
small home in the middle of Peanut Province. They were in her sitting
room. Matilda, Al, Wilma, and Glenda sat with her. They held delicate
peanut brittle cups. They were drinking peaunt butter tea.
ÒSo where are we, again?Ó Glenda Guilty asked the old woman. The
woman reached up and patted the bun of her white hair.
ÒWhy, Peanut Province, dears,Ó Peanut Brittle Polly said. She sipped
her tea. ÒYou are welcome to stay as long as you like.Ó
ÒWeÕre looking for two girls,Ó Matilda said. ÒTwo little girls. Their
names are Katie and Bambi. TheyÕre runaways. They need to be put into
Child Protective Services.Ó
ÒFor their protection, of course,Ó Wilma added.
ÒWell we all need protection these days, I imagine, with Licorice Lad
in charge,Ó Peaunut Brittle Polly said.
ÒYou donÕt actually have to remain in character while weÕre speaking
to you, do you?Ó Matilda asked. ÒIÕve heard of actors who stay in
character, even when theyÕre not playing a role, but the matter of the girls
is important.Ó
ÒGovernment business,Ó Glenda said.
ÒSay, are there any candy apples around here?Ó Al asked, gazing out
the window. ÒAll I see are fields of peanuts. And lots of little midgets
running about, in peanut costumes. This must be some movie youÕre
filming.Ó
ÒQuiet, Al,Ó Matilda said. ÒMadam, two girls are lost on your movie
set. WeÕre trying to find them. If you see them, donÕt let them out of your
sight! Just keep them here. Send one of these midget people on up the
road. WeÕve been following the road outside for some time now. And
weÕre going to keep following it, I suppose.Ó
ÒAlright, dears,Ó Peanut Brittle Polly said. ÒBut, really, you should
stay the night. I have plenty of peanut brittle I can feed you.Ó
ÒMmmm!Ó Al said. Matilda glanced out the window. The sun was
setting.
ÒWell, I supppose we must,Ó Matilda said. ÒNo use going on any
farther today.Ó
ÒDo you have anyplace to bathe?Ó Glenda asked.
ÒThere are pools of steaming peanut butter near here,Ó Peanut
Brittle Polly said. She stood up, carefully, setting her cup on a small
table next to her and reaching around to touch the small of her back.
ÒCome, dears. You do look rather bedraggled. IÕll show you where you can
wash up,Ó she said. ÒSorry, IÕve got arthritis,Ó she added. She reached for
a cane leaning against the table where sheÕd set down her tea. Grabbing it,
she said, ÒCome! Come! Peanut Brittle Polly will take good care of you.
DonÕt you worry!Ó
30
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