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THE GREAT F U C K W O M E N CONTEST !
by holy joe
Recently a woman told me, ÒYour posts are the most offensive on the
Net!Ó
I donÕt think they are, though. I mean, you know, theyÕre just my
opinions. ItÕs not like I make them purposely offensive or anything. So I
think we should teach this woman what ÔoffensiveÕ is. These damn
feminists are always saying, ÒOh! You touched me, thatÕs offensive!Ó Or
ÒYou looked at me, thatÕs harassment.Ó Or, ÒYou looked at my daughter,
thatÕs a heinous crime!Ó
Sure, ladies. Hitler, Stalin, and Pol Pot were committing garden-
variety crimes. ItÕs looking at little girls thatÕs the real crime!
IÕm setting up a contest. My contest is going to be called, ÒThe Most
Offensive Post on the Net Contest.Ó Whoever posts the most offensive
post will win a prize. (IÕm not sure what it is yet. Maybe a yearÕs
subscription to Hustler.)
Anyway, please post the most offensive posts you can possibly think
of on the Net. This lets you enter my contest and, when IÕm done reading
all the posts, it gives you the chance to win a prize. Remember, the posts
have to be offensive to women, because weÕre trying to teach these damn
feminist women what offensive is. No offensive posts about fat guys,
please. (IÕm not a woman.) Also, no jokes about men masturbating.
(Again, this isnÕt a topic that offends women. They just assume fat guys
who canÕt get a date jack off.) And, please, no jokes about guys who go to
Tower Books. Women are already plenty aware how many guys look at
porno at Tower Books. Keep your jokes ABOUT women, and youÕll be most
certain to offend them.
You know, boobs, cunts, birth control, those sorts of jokes. Like,
ÒWow. If your tits were any smaller, youÕd need a microscope to find
them!Ó (A lame joke, I know, but I didnÕt want to burn up any good ones.)
Go to it, guys! LetÕs show these women what ÔoffensiveÕ really
means! Hopefully, when this contest is over, women will no longer
criticize our normal remarks and behavior.
Andrew Roller Presents
FUCK DECENCY
Sponsored by: JOE CAMEL
Issue No. 286
Naughty Naked Dreamgirls in
Pussy Playland
Chapter One
ÒNo, use the bowl,Ó Tabitha told me. ÒItÕs more fun for the men that
way. Come, get down off the bed and squat over it.Ó She bent and placed
it down on the rug. Catlike I unbent my legs and crawled across the bed,
letting the men admire my tail. I hopped down and padded to the bowl and
squatted myself down over it. I waited, plucking at my moist pubic hair,
for my pee to come. Tabitha got some linen napkins from the night stand
and unfolded one of them to wipe me when I was done.
ÒWell?Ó she asked.
ÒOkay, just a minute,Ó I said. And then my pee came squirting out
and splashed into the bowl.
ÒOhhh, she looks so sweet,Ó Francis said, watching me. ÒPoop out
your bon bons too!Ó she suggested. I could feel them bulging inside me and
very much wanted to obey her.
ÒNo, not until sheÕs had her stuffing,Ó Tabitha said. She told me to
squeeze my bottom cheeks together with my hands as I peed to prevent
myself from pooping them out. I obeyed, reluctantly.
Tabitha knelt down in front of me and wiped my pussy when I was
done. Then I got back in bed. Beth and Francis and, finally, Tabitha, took
their place on the pot, peeing leisurely, the men watching us, with Tabitha
running to the toilet after each pee to empty the bowl.
ÒItÕs fun using the potty in front of the guys,Ó Beth admitted quietly
to me.
ÒYes,Ó I answered.
ÒHow do those clamps feel?Ó she asked. Sympathetically she
touched the tassels that were hung from my nipples and watched them
sway.
ÒI want them off,Ó I replied.
ÒAs soon as youÕve been stuffed Tabitha will allow it,Ó Beth said
matter-of-factly.
ÒThen letÕs get it over with, please,Ó I begged.
ÒAlright,Ó Beth said. She called out to Tabitha, who was just coming
back from the bathroom. ÒTabby! Can Kelly please have her stuffing now?
Her tits are hurting!Ó
ÒOf course theyÕre hurting! I put clamps on them,Ó Tabitha laughed.
ÒAlright, weÕve had enough fun. Time for business.Ó She climbed up onto
our bed. ÒStuart, I hope youÕve enjoyed having that sperm in your balls
because youÕre going to pump it out now,Ó Tabitha told him. She reached
between his legs and possessively cupped his sack. It was taut and full.
ÒIÕm more than ready for that,Ó Stuart admitted.
ÒKelly, please kneel at the head of the bed,Ó Tabitha told me. ÒAnd
lift up the pillow and hand me the whip, please. I want to whip that
scrumptious bottom of yours so it feels nice and glowing when Stuart
does you.Ó
ÒBut--Ó I began.
ÒItÕs the opposite of the Binaca,Ó she replied. ÒIt stings when its
applied but feels nicer later. Warm and glowing. Fetch, doggie, or IÕll lay
on twice as many as I usually do. You did moon Stuart, remember? You
deserve a little smacking.Ó
ÒI specialize in punishing girlsÕ bottoms,Ó Stuart offered.
ÒYes, I know, Stuart, but this is my bed and I want to whip her,Ó
Tabitha told him as I gulpingly pulled out the whip and passed it to her.
ÒAlso, Stuart, itÕs my whip,Ó Tabitha smiled. ÒYou have a nice white
hiney. I may do you later, dear. Have any of your loves ever whipped you?Ó
ÒWell, IÕm not into FEMALE domination,Ó Stuart answered.
ÒI know, just male, hmmm? WhatÕs good for the goose is good for
the gander, Stuart,Ó Tabitha answered, and before Stuart could stop her
she gave a test flick of her whip across his ass.
ÒWhoa! DonÕt do that!Ó Stuart said. He clapped his hands over his
butt. Alex laughed. Both their cocks stuck up like big worms wishing to
be forever at attention. I knew weÕd draft them soon, Tabitha and Beth and
Francis and I.
ÒShow me your bottom, dear,Ó Tabitha said to me. ÒPut your face on
the pillow and kneel up properly and let me see that naughty tail of yours.Ó
Reluctantly I assumed a position on all fours that let them all see my
white bottom, but little of my face. Tabitha eased my legs apart and I felt
myself blush as my fig came into view. There was absolutely nothing to
prevent them from looking right at my fanny and my private! They gazed
at me with casual abandon, as if at some strip show where girls were
required to undress. The men wanted to masturbate themselves but,
thanks to the Binaca and lotion, they were too much on edge to tolerate
any more play. Carefully the girls dandled their balls and stroked the
insides of their powerful thighs. ÒDonÕt pop them,Ó Tabitha warned my
soul-mates.
ÒWe wonÕt,Ó the girls answered, their voices high, like children in
the park.
ÒMmmm, such a nice bottom,Ó Tabitha observed, turning her
attention to me. She slipped the snakeskin lash between her fingers,
toying with its length. It had cruel tassels on its tip that were frayed and
knotted.
ÒThis is an old whip, a little worn,Ó Tabitha told me as I gulpingly
looked back at it. ÒThey used to whip racehorses with it. Now its been
put out to pasture and is just used on female bottoms. Girls and women
who need to be taught to behave. Are you sorry you showed off your
bottom to everyone in the living room?Ó
ÒYes, very much so,Ó I answered. I felt very nervous. My thighs and
legs seemed to be shaking right down to my squirming toes. WeÕd all
kicked off our sandals before climbing into TabithaÕs bed but now, with
the soles of my soft feet showing themselves to her, I wondered if they
were safe. I knew the Arabs tortured feet sometimes. But I was most
worried about my bottom. This was something I wouldnÕt even let my
mother do to me!
ÒReady?Ó Tabitha asked.
ÒNo,Ó I answered truthfully.
ÒTry not to shout too loudly. I donÕt want everyone cuming in here,Ó
Tabitha told me. And then, with a casual flick of her wrist, she sent the
whip flying into my fanny.
ÒYeeeowch!Ó I gritted. I swallowed hard. I didnÕt want to seem
babyish.
ÒOooh, poor baby,Ó Tabitha said. She caressed a spot on my bottom
where a bright pink streak had been placed. The handiwork of her whip.
ÒNow, hereÕs another. Take your medicine,Ó she said. And she let her whip
fly again, striking me hard.
ÒYeeeeOWCH!Ó I yelped. I blinked back tears. She gave me two more
in quick succession. I found myself screaming loudly and tears running
down my face, threatening to spoil my makeup. I had waterproof makeup
but I knew that sobbing and weeping and smearing my face into my pillow
would certainly mess it up. I tried flexing my bottom cheeks to assuage
the sting. I tried keeping my chin up, so my face wouldnÕt smear lipstick
all over it. But my hands clutched the pillow hard and I knew IÕd be biting
into it in a minute.
WHACK! WHACK! SLACK! WHACK! Tabitha really gave it to me now.
She let several strokes splatter the knots at the end of the whip over my
tushy. I howled and ground my face in my pillow and forgot all about
preserving my makeup. All the while I was conscious of my fig on display
and my titties jangling with their clamps.
ÒOh, how nice,Ó I heard someone say at the door and knew, as I
bounced on my knees under each new searing lash of the whip, that others
had come to watch. My legs were apart, my cunny was on display, and my
bottom was bare. What would my mother think? Would I run home to her
tonight, rubbing my heinie? How would I sit tomorrow at school. The next
strokes of the whip blasted all those thoughts out of my head as Tabitha
made me feel the whip very deeply, impressing it into my tender cheeks
like nothing IÕd ever felt before.
ÒEnough! Enough!Ó I cried. I flattened myself on my belly and my
hands flew back to my tush. Madly I rubbed myself, feeling even worse as
I touched my flayed bottom. But I had to protect it at all costs! Tabitha
tried to remove my hands but I held them as tight as I could to my flaming
cheeks.
ÒShall we tie her?Ó Francis asked. She scrambled to the head of the
bed and began uncoiling one of the white ropes.
ÒPoor girl, she has not yet learned the joy of it,Ó Tabitha sighed.
ÒReam her, Stuart. IÕve given her all she can take.Ó
Stuart came to me then and hefted me right up, his hands round my
waist, tight as iron clamps. He lifted my hips and positioned me back on
my knees as I begged him through my tears to let me go. Francis, feeling
inspired, lifted my chin and kissed my mouth. I did not want her kisses
but she insisted, driving her tongue into me and whispering consoling
words. This, of course, the girl who just moments before had wanted to
see me tied and whipped some more.
Stuart put his thing to my cunt. I was sinfully wet and, still
gleaming with the lotion Tabitha had applied to relieve his cock from the
Binaca, Stuart pushed himself into me as easily as one might. At 14 I was
no easy fuck. But, thanks to the whipping and our playing, I was not
emotionally resistant. He had only to fight the tightness of my womb
itself. I wanted him, if only to get the bon bons out of my butt and the
clamps off my nipples. I did all I could, despite my crying and my pain, to
open myself and receive him. The bon bons made me even tighter than I
should have been, but Tabitha had planned it that way, just to be nasty to
me. Every inch of his manhood that he got up me seemed about to split me
in two. I cried, I howled, until finally Stuart, getting in front of me to
complete my stuffing, put his cock into my mouth.
As I sucked Stuart like a baby feeds on a bottle, Tabitha insinuated
herself beneath Stuart and put her mouth to my cunny. I felt a sense of
shock as her wet, moving mouth, suddenly joined with my clit, even as
Stuart drove himself into the folds of my cunt. All around my tiny spot
Tabitha slurped and fed, nibbling into me as if I were her dinner and she
were a starving child. I moaned, I bucked, I lost all sense of time and
space. I even forgot all about the people who stood in the doorway
admiring my performance. Well, it was the same folks IÕd shown my
bottom to earlier, so I had no cause of complaint, I guess. But I did feel a
little embarrassed when it was all over.
Crying from my whipping and begging Stuart to uncork himself from
me even as I bounced my bottom backward to take more of him, I reached
my climax and then came some more. I lost track of my orgasms. There
was no use counting them, with Tabitha endlessly licking me. Stuart,
whoÕd seemed on the verge of cuming as we played with the Binaca, found
new strength and held himself back and reamed me again and again. I felt
as if IÕd been impaled on some giant iron bar that some inquisitorial Pope
was using to spill confessions from me. I confessed, but the torture
continued anyway. Somewhere on the far side of heaven I found myself
panting with a limp male penis being withdrawn from me. Bleary eyed, my
makeup long since wasted and ruined, I looked back to find Stuart had long
since removed himself and been replaced by Alex, while Francis fed in my
mouth, cleaning it of AlexÕs spent sperm.
ÒHi,Ó I said when at last IÕd been left to myself and recovered.
ÒHi,Ó Tabitha said. She was lying with her head on my belly and she
kissed my belly button. Her bottom, bulbing way down at the tail of her
back, seemed smeared with sperm and I guessed someone had taken her in
her hole.
ÒPlease donÕt whip me again,Ó I said.
ÒMmmmm, with a bottom like that youÕre doomed to be whipped until
youÕre 40,Ó she said truthfully to me.
ÒThen IÕll never have sex again,Ó I declared. Even as I spoke I wished
sheÕd move her head so I could frig myself.
ÒYouÕre so young and sweet,Ó she smiled. She moved her face down
my belly and kissed my bush and I did not stop her.
Chapter Two
ÒWake up, silly!Ó I heard a female voice urge. A slap hit my belly. I
stirred. In my mind I was wondering at a teacherÕs question at school.
Dreamily I sucked on my fingertip and considered raising my hand.
Somehow, in my dream, I knew if I raised my hand my t-shirt was so short
that it would lift up and show my boobies.
And then I found myself staring into TabithaÕs eyes. ÒIÕm sorry, I
thought I had the answer,Ó I said sleepily. Was she my teacher?
ÒWhat answer?Ó she asked. I felt her fingers press into my pussy
lips and knew, at last, where I was. She slapped my tummy again.
ÒI know youÕre young and blonde and cute,Ó Tabitha said to me
seriously. ÒBut youÕre going to have to participate in our activities just
like everyone else.Ó Tabitha said.
ÒOkay,Ó I lisped. I sucked my finger innocently. She slapped my
breasts. ÒOWwoooo!Ó I cried. ÒThat hurt.Ó
ÒNo excuses,Ó Tabitha said. Her eyes drank in my 14-year-old figure.
ÒYou have the body for it. Lean and firm, tanned, with nice big breasts
that I know must give your mother fits. Get up, honey. WeÕre going to have
a contest!Ó
She permitted me a little stretch and then I got up out of the bed.
Seeing a mirror, I ran my hands through my hair. She took my hand and
tugged at it.
ÒCanÕt I at least freshen up?Ó I asked her.
ÒWhy bother? YouÕre just going to get fucked again,Ó she smiled. My
belly full of AlexÕs sperm, I walked with her hand-in-hand out to the
living room. It was dark, save for the fire in the fireplace where everyone
was huddling around. IÕd noticed a chill getting out of the bed. Now I
realized someone had turned off the heat and opened a window to let the
night air in. It was cold, blowing in off the sea. I thought I heard a boat in
the distance sound its horn. It was a warning, to other ships, but I
wondered if it might be meant by God to warn me too. After all, I knew
nobody here, except my rotten, cheating (and hunky) boyfriend Alex.
STOCK MARKET INFO !
ÒEven a dead cat bounces if you drop it from a high enough roof.
Hence the charming name -- dead-cat bounce -- that financial folk give
to short-lived rallies that always occur in even the most savage of
bear markets.Ó
- This valuable gem of vital information has been generously
supplied to you by HJNS, the Ôholy joe news service,Õ regarding the all-
important Japanese stock market.
(and courtesy of The Economist, August 16, 1997, pg. 57.)
AND IN THE END...
ANDREA DORKIN TRIUMPHS AT LAST !
ÒAfter the lady Ishtar had gone down into the land of no return,
The bull did not mount the cow, the ass approached not the she-ass;
To the maid in the street no man drew near; -(thank God for that! - h.j.)
The man slept in his apartment,
The maid slept by herself.Ó
- Sumerian/Babylonian myth of Ishtar and Tammuz.
-------------------------- Fuck Decency! ------------------------
-Free e-mail subscriptions: No longer available due to mailbombing of
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-formerly I was andrewroller@sprintmail.com, roller66@inreach.com,
roller666@aol.com Read my complete works under these names by
going to: http://www.excite.com (Click on ÔnewsgroupsÕ and search
under my various former screen names). (Also you can read irrelevant
bullshit posted by right-wing Christians.)
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NAMBLA, P.O. Box 174, Midtown Station, New York, NY 10018.
-Naughty Naked Dreamgirls (Library of Congress ISSN: 1070-1427) is
copyright 1997 and a trademark of Andrew Roller.
-END OF 286 EMISSION
- Ishtar: The Story of Civilization, by Will and Ariel Durant, Volume 1,
pg. 239.