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#51761475.  More stories can be found at /~Rob_Morton.

   Copyright 2001, Robert B.  Morton, II, all rights reserved.

   Disclaimer

   For those individuals not of legal age to read this where they live,
shame on you!  For those folks who may be offended by this writing, all I
can say is caveat lector--you have been warned.  The following is a work of
fiction and the usual statements about bearing any resemblance to people or
places, living or dead, being coincidental, etc., apply here.

   Second Thoughts, by Rob Morton (M/M, cons)

   One

   You ever have one of those moments where you were thinking two things at
the same time, like you were glad something was happening - but wishing it
wasn't?

   I had one of those moments a few hours ago.  There I was, all hot and
sweaty and feeling very good with Rod's seven-inch cock reaming my ass out
and thinking that I had made the right decision coming home with him.

   At the same time, I found myself wishing I had never accepted his
invitation and gotten myself into this situation to begin with.

   It wasn't like I didn't know he was gay - he told me as much.  And, it
wasn't like I didn't know he found me attractive and was interested in
"getting to know me" better.  In this, it wasn't like I didn't know what he
meant.

   What was really funny is that I knew what Rod wanted - and I wanted him
to have it!  Oh, did I mention that I'm not gay?  Sorry, I should have said
that in the beginning but I have a lot on my mind right about now, like,
why I wanted to have sex with him.

   Rod wasn't exactly one of those thickly built guys...  nor was he the
drop-dead model type.  He didn't really look or act gay either; I mean, he
wasn't acting all feminine like you see some gay guys do.

   Checking my own state of mind at the time, I can't say that I was too
drunk nor could I say that I wasn't getting my share, if you know what I
mean.  It's just that right after Rod told me he was gay and what he'd like
to do, I found myself thinking, "Why not?"

   So, we settled our bar tab and left, with me following him home.  Even
as I focused on keeping Rod's battered blue car in sight, I felt a sense of
anticipation I hadn't felt in years, right along with a rather queasy
feeling in my stomach, like I just realized I was about to regret my
decision.  In fact, I had a chance to just hang a right and head for the
Interstate - he wouldn't have noticed a thing!  Instead, I drove right by
the turn...

   Two

   If Rod wasn't the glamorous type, neither was his apartment - it was
just as non-descript as he was.  It was the kind of place where you'd look
at it but wouldn't really see it, you know?  I parked my car in a space
close to where Rod had parked and, after making sure the car was locked and
the alarm activated, followed him inside.  Rod waved me to a seat on the
sofa and headed for the kitchen.

   "Do you want a beer?" he asked.

   "I guess so," I replied.  The feeling of great anticipation was really
working on me so much I thought I was going to piss myself.  At the same
time, I felt an unnatural calm mixing in with the other feeling...

   "I'm glad you're here," Rod said, handing me a cold one and taking a
seat next to me.

   I didn't answer him; instead, I cracked open my grain grenade and took a
long pull off of it, the bubble of carbonation stinging my sinuses.  If Rod
was bothered by my silence, he didn't show it.

   "Well, what's up?" he asked, his brown eyes flicking over me.  I could
tell he was just as nervous as I was and just as unsure about how to begin.
I'm sure if he were with another gay lover, getting started would have been
easy.

   Instead of answering him directly, I just shrugged and took another hit
off the cold brew before sitting it on the table in front of me.  I was
content to just sit back and see what Rod would do next...  which doesn't
explain why I reached over and rubbed the front of his pants, does it?

   Oh, man!  He was hard in an instant, his prick rising so fast I could
see the color drain from his face as his penis rapidly filled with blood.

   "Hmm," Rod moaned, leaning back a little and letting me feel him up.  "A
little bold for a first-timer, are we?"

   "Whatever," I said softly, unfastening his pants and exposing his cock,
which sprang free of his pants rather easily - no underwear.  I wrapped my
fingers around his shaft and began jerking him off slowly, feeling the heat
of his dick warming my hand.

   "That feels good," Rod whispered, raising his ass up and working his
pants down until he could kick them off with his feet.  He leaned over to
kiss me, only to run into the palm of my hand.

   "Don't," I said, continuing to work his shaft with my hand.

   "Sorry..." Rod apologized.  "I just thought..."

   "Shhh." I said evenly, watching a clear drop of pre-cum appear at his
cock slit.  I leaned over and sucked the head of his cock into my mouth,
letting my tongue collect the drop of pre-cum and thinking about how good
he tasted and how great it felt to have him in my mouth...  which really
surprised the hell out of me since I had never in my life sucked another
man's cock, let alone put my hand on one.

   Yet, here I was, head bobbing up and down on his meat missile, slobbing
his knob like an old pro.  I used my other hand to gently cup his balls,
testing their weight and feel.  I wouldn't say that Rod had a huge set - I
knew my own sac was bigger - but did it really matter?

   I suppose not, as I sucked each of his nuts in turn into my mouth,
taking a great deal of pleasure in hearing him moaning with delight.  Even
as I did this outlandish act, my hand continued to work his dick, slowly
and deliberately, keeping him hard and ready.

   Having made sure both of his jewels were attended to, I went back to
sucking Rod's cock, surprising myself as the hungry, slurping sounds
reached my ears.  Oh, I was having a lot of fun doing this!

   My own cock was raging inside my pants, begging to be set free so I
freed it - a neat trick since I was bent over sucking another man's dick at
the same time.  I managed it, though and my own seven-inch sword stabbed
into the air, pulsing hotly with each beat of my heart.

   I wasn't comfortable all bent in half, so I got off the sofa and
positioned myself between Rod's legs - all without releasing my oral hold
on him.  I felt his hands on my head and, for some reason, it seemed to
infuriate me - so I slapped them away, shaking my head in the negative.

   Rod didn't say anything and I could only imagine the hurt look on his
face and the frustration he must have felt; he wanted to participate
further and I wasn't hearing any of it.  He got over it, though, because he
was gently fucking his pricking in and out of my mouth...

   There was a moment I seemed to lose track of; one moment, I'm on my
knees in front of him, getting my tonsils scoured by his cock knob.  The
next thing I know, I'm flat on my back on the floor, Rod's dick sliding
into my mouth and my own erection disappearing into his.  I had a quick
second to be impressed with the way he took my whole dick into his mouth in
one gulp...  then I was lost in the dual sensations of sucking and being
sucked.

   Three

   I don't know how long we were like this, two grown men pumping dick into
each other's mouth, grunting and groaning like a couple of animals.  All I
knew is that I loved every minute of the action, even as I was regretting
what I knew would come next.  And, speaking of coming...

   Rod was oozing more and more pre-cum into my mouth and I was really
getting into the salty taste of it; I felt his dong grow a little longer
and thicker, his thrusts into my mouth getting faster.  I heard him draw in
a deep breath through his nose, felt his ass tighten under my hands...  and
tasted his sperm in my mouth, hot, thick and heavy.

   I would have taken more time to appreciate the whole thing of letting a
man shoot his load into my mouth - except I was spilling my own seed into
Rod's mouth, my hips thrusting upward, fucking his mouth until I felt my
cock begin to soften.

   Damn, that was good, I thought as I licked the remnants of Rod's spunk
from my lips, even as he was moving from atop me.  I was still very shaky
from my own release, relishing that very odd feeling a man gets right after
he shoots, so much that I didn't notice Rod turning me onto my stomach.

   A bit of awareness came back to me as I heard the sound of something
being torn open, followed by a weird, wet kind of sound.  I realized that
Rod was putting on a condom and he intended to fuck my virgin ass,
something I didn't want to happen!

   So why was I getting onto my knees?  And, why was I shoving my ass back
against his stone-hard erection, trying to get it inside of me?  Better
yet, who the hell was shouting, "Shove that motherfucker inside me!"

   I remember a white-hot flash of pain, followed by the incredible urge to
leave my dinner on the carpet in front of me.  Just as quickly as the pain
hit me, it disappeared, having been replaced by the feeling of my
semi-erect cock spilling another load, something I thought was impossible.

   I hated myself for allowing this to happen, hated the way Rod's cock in
my ass made me feel.  Hated the way my body reacted to being fucked and I
inwardly cursed myself each time I moaned with the pleasure I was feeling.

   Hated the feel of Rod's hands on my ass as he spread my cheeks to allow
him to plunge into my bowels even further.  Despised the way he was
grunting and cursing as he plowed my back hole, just as I hated myself for
telling him to take the fucking condom off and do it harder and faster
because I wanted to feel the real him inside my ass.

   Four

   I did like it when he came inside of me - I was impressed that he kept
it up after I sucked him off and still had enough to take my anal cherry. I
was letting lose yet another load of jizz as Rod's cock pumped man-juice
into my sore backside.  Rod was getting soft inside me, but he kept right
on dicking my rectum, working out the last of his ejaculation.

   Here's another blank spot in my memory.  I remember Rod pulling out of
me, but I don't remember switching places with him, just like I don't
remember slathering a whole lot of lubricant onto my hardness and shoving
it into his ass hole.  I barely remember the funny feeling of his sperm
running out of my gaping hole...

   But I do remember making his just as wide as he had made mine!  I even
remember spreading his hairy ass cheeks aside and watching my cock
disappear into him, thinking about how disgusting it was to be in another
person's shitter while thinking about how good it felt.

   The hate returned with a vengeance, too; I hated the way I was feeling,
hated the fact that I was enjoying sodomizing a fellow male.  Hated Rod for
encouraging me and telling me how good I felt inside of him.  I even hated
myself for reaching around and grabbing Rod's dick and jacking it into
complete hardness again.

   I felt so dirty and, yet, so very good as I deposited a load of goo into
Rod's bowels.  I knew I was getting soft but Rod's ass was so nice and
tight, I didn't want to pull out just yet - but I knew I'd have to because
there was no way I was going to get his cock back into me if I didn't.

   Now I'm on my back, legs wrapped around Rod's waist and he's really
giving it to me, slamming his cock into my ass and cursing like a madman. I
wanted to just reach up and hit him so hard his jaw would break - but the
thought just kinda left me when I felt more of Rod's sperm in my bung
hole...

   Epilogue

   The next thing I knew, the sun was rising.  I needed a shower and a cup
of coffee in that order; Rod awoke and went to put the coffee on while I
got cleaned up.  I must have been in the shower for a while because Rod
climbed in with me, saying something about my coffee being on the back of
the toilet seat.

   At least I think that's what he said - I was too busy sliding his cock
into my mouth to hear what he said.  I could feel the water raining onto my
back, hot and stinging - but not as hot as feeling Rod's dick unloading
jizz into my mouth.  I stood up to wash the excess from my face, bending
over a little and feeling Rod enter me - much easier than last night, let
me tell you.

   Impressive!  The man can get his rocks off and keep it up to deliver
another steamy load!  I'll have to remember to ask him how he does that,
right after I bust a nut in him.

   Eventually, the fun and games are over and I've got get home.  As I
drove home, I really hated what had happened while, at the same time,
feeling very happy that it had...  because I knew I would want to do it
again...  and very soon.

   Finis