Note: This story was dynamically reformatted for online reading convenience.
 
 Paradise Lost, Paradise Regained, Part 16

   Sunday the 25th of May

   "It's a good thing we have to go to work tomorrow," she said moodily
next morning.  "Otherwise, I might have troubles sitting on my butt.  Not
that I complain, but well, somebody has to pay the rent.  You know, you
looked so upright and, well square in a good way, I'd never have
dreamed..."

   "Well, I guess I was, in a way.  I was determined to be that way and
honestly, I was just about to really settle into being a straight and
boring husband.  I mean, since we've been married I managed to burry all my
kinky little pleasure deep down, never to let them surface ever again and I
was almost there, before, China.  I even believed we would get our sex-life
straight, the way it had been before I left."

   "Ouch, that hurt, but I guess I don't deserve any better.  Actually,
that's exactly how I felt too.  You know, I was never really able to kill
my desire to smoke and whenever I stood next to a smoker, I could've sucked
the smoke out of his lungs.  Still, with you I felt secure and loved and,
well, cozy, if you want.  And then you, out of a sudden, wanted to flee to
China.  Well, that's how it felt anyway.  Sorry, I know it wasn't your
fault and it was me who tripped, but when I didn't hear from you for almost
three days, I guess I kinda freaked out and drank and smoked and, err, yeah
and then..." she said sadly,

   "Guess we'll have to accept neither of us could've held it up in the
long run.  Just when I finally managed to open up your appetite... I mean,
the way you told me, you had spent most of the teenage years and even
after, frustrated and, err, well, maybe you just needed to see how it's
like with other men.  If you, I don't know, would've been more experienced
or something, you wouldn't have been curious or whatever... " I replied
sternly, trying to keep it matter-of-fact like, though I walked on raw meat
inside.

   Moira, in an attempt soothe me, leaped at my throat and hugged and
kissed me on my neck.

   "Honey, I'm so sorry.  I've been the worst kind of treacherous whore and
I'd give an arm and I would never again touch alcohol, nicotine and sweets,
if I could turn back time." She said, sobbing softly.

   I squeezed her tight, kissed her softly on her lips and said:

   "Sweety, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to spoil your fun.  We had such a
wonderful time and now... But we can't just never touch the subject again,
it's bound to surface once in a while, so we'd just as well talk it out. 
That's what a counselor would say anyway.  Besides, I'm not really that
kind of macho.  I mean, if you leave out the safer sex stuff out of it, it
isn't really that much of a big deal.  Sex isn't love, though it does fit
in nicely, but it's not what love is about."

   I could've gone further, but I did realize silence for once was gold.

   "Yeah, I guess you're right.  I just wish there was a way to make it up
to you.  But you're such a good guy, you wouldn't pay back in kind and I'm
not even sure how I would feel about that.  So I'll just try to be a good
lover and I'll fulfill your little kinky fantasies, like right now I'll
light up another pipe, just for the heck of it."

   Monday, the 26th of May to Wednesday , the 28th

   "I'll have to get up earlier from now on." Moira greeted me, wrapped in
a cloud of fragrant pipe smoke next morning, when I got down to the
kitchen. "A good pipe takes time to enjoy.  I can't just suck it down like
a cigarette.  Guess I'll finish this one on the road.  Give us a kiss and
off you go.  You're the boss now, don't be late."

   I rejoiced on the sweetish taste of her pipe and all but liked her
tongue, but she was right.  I would get late if I lingered on, glued to her
lips like that.  Besides, as she loved to keep her pipe between her teeth
most of the time, as any serious pipe-smoker would do, I didn't want to
keep her form her treat too long.

   My new job turned out to be quite a burden, so I came home late the next
days.  That didn't keep me from being nice, tender and supporting to Moira
but I was too crushed to be a good lover.  We didn't touch any of the
unpleasant subjects either.  And then Wednesday came, her night out.

   Wednesday, the 28th, evening

   At ten thirty she still wasn't home.  I cursed the fact that Moira had
stoutly refused to buy a cell phone and stared at the TV set without seeing
anything.  True, I couldn't imagine she would actually do anything
untoward. The mere thought made me winch.  If the worst should happen and
she would actually stay out all night or admit she had screwed around
again, I would go berserk or cut my throat.  Then finally a few minutes
after eleven, I finally heard her keys in the door.

   When she stepped in I couldn't utter a word, I just kept staring at her,
prepared for the worst.  But then I saw she was quite sober and smiling
shyly.

   "So sorry I'm so late, Honey, I just lost the time somehow".  She said
apologetically.

   I was still pissed and didn't say a word, until I noticed a smell not
unlike pipe-smoke.  I had focused on her face to look for traces of guilt
or anything untoward, but now, having found nothing at all to worry me, I
looked down.  Between her fingers, I saw something that looked like a
cigar, though the smell didn't quite match.  The revelation hit me like a
hammer.  I was a bit disappointed that she had robbed me of the chance to
introduce her to these.  The Middleton tipped cigars, made of pipe-tobacco!


   She misinterpreted my look and seemed afraid to step up close.

   "You mad at me?  I just, well there was this guy at the bar and well, he
tried to hit on me.  I have to confess, I was a bit tempted, but not
seriously.  We did talk though, and after he understood it's not going to
happen, we just went on in a friendly way.  A good thing I wasn't in the
mood for drinking.  I mean, the last time and the one before, I guess I
subconscious tried to drown the pangs of guilt, but somehow, I realized it
wouldn't get better if I got wasted again.  Too bad it got so late, I'd
sure wanted to, oh, well, never mind.

   Anyway, the guy was smoking these." She said, pausing to take a drag and
wow, the amount of smoke she exhaled was incredible.

   "He saw I was getting curious and then he told me he actually is a pipe
smoker, but he hated all the ado with the pipe in public, so he found these
cigars, a sort of pipe replacement.  They're made from the same tobacco you
bought me for my pipes actually..."

   Then she looked up and it made click.

   "You knew, you son of a gun, you wanted to get me to smoke these, didn't
you?"

   All I could do was to nod.  Of course she was all over me in the
fraction of the second, toppling me on my back on the couch.  She pulled
hard on the cigar, inhaled till her bra almost popped open and then she
gave me a smoky lick and kiss on my lips till I almost jerked off in my
pants.  It was fantastic.

   "Mmmh, I can see how these things turn you on.  I guess I could really
grow to like them.  Tasty as a pipe and easy to smoke like a ciggie.  But
you know, I just lit this one and it takes a while to smoke it down. 
That's why I stayed behind so long, the guy insisted I should try one and
then I accepted a second one and finally he gave me two for the road.  Nice
of him.  And he never got anything in return." She said and blew a load of
smoke right into my face.

   "Hey, what are you up to?  Can't a girl have smoke in peace?" she asked
languidly, her tone telling me she actually didn't mind at all to be
touched like that while she smoked.

   "Nope, not if she looks so maddeningly sexy with that cigar.  You mind
if I ask you to keep smoking, while we..." I asked, hoping she would
consent.

   "I've been hoping you ask for it."

   We stripped naked in no time.  She kept sucking in huge amount of smoke,
though she had some difficulties towards the end.  When the proper moment
came, she exhaled clouds of smoke with her mouth fully opened, a memorable
sight and I followed suit with my own climax.

   Thursday, the 29th of May

   The next day, between two meetings, I did some research on the web, as I
faint memory ad popped up.  Moira had been rather disappointed she couldn't
smoke her cigars, even if she would've had some, during her smoke breaks.
It just took too long to finish a whole cigar, over twenty minutes, so she
reluctantly had to take her Marlboros with her.

   I found confirmation for what I had remembered and so I could hardly
concentrate on my work.  After hours I took a detour on my way home and
went to the big tobacco shop up town.  I found what I was looking for and
returned home with a shopping bag full of goodies.

   I found Moira on the couch, happily puffing on her pipe.  Holding the
bag behind my back, I bent forward and gave her a wet smooch right on her
closed lips.  She parted her lips a bit and while her teeth kept the stem
of the pipe firmly in place, she blew a bit of smoke into my mouth and then
sucked at the pipe and repeated the process.  Whether she did that just to
be nice to me or expected me to react in the usual way, I didn't know, but
I had something to finish first.

   "Ah, that was yummy," I said, "Could do with more of that, but before we
go upstairs, Very Merry Unbirthday to you."

   Saying this I dropped the shopping bag with the John Middleton logo in
it, on Moira's lap.

   "Hey, what's that?  For me?  How nice!" she exclaimed and tucked at my
sleeve to make me join her on the couch.

   I complied immediately, eagerly waiting to see her hopefully positive
reaction.  She didn't disappoint me.

   "Woah, Honey, you're e such a darling.  A big box of these delicious
cigars.  But wait, what are these?  Baby cigars?  Shell me plant them in a
pot so they can grow up?" she asked jokingly.

   "Yeah, sure and don't forget to water them and put some fertilizer in
too." I answered, laughing.

   We both giggled and I hugged her tenderly.

   "But seriously, why did you buy these?" she asked as if she hadn't
already guessed.

   "Well, you said you just can't smoke a full cigar in ten minutes, so I
googled some and this is what I found.  Same stuff as the grown up ones,
but half the size, just right to have a fast break and see here, that's
just what they call'em, Fast Break.  So now you can enjoy these in your
smoke breaks or whenever you feel like it.  I bought two big-packs of the
small ones, they should last for a while."

   "Are they expensive?" she asked worriedly.

   "Nope, not really.  Besides, I'm DH now, department head, and there's
quite a raise tied to that and there will be company car in it for me too."

   "Hey, this gets better and better.  What kind of car?" she asked
eagerly.

   "Guess it's a Bummer.  I didn't care to ask, I had other stuff on my
mind." I replied.

   "A Bummer?  You mean a BMW?  Woah, what did you do in China, double
their turnaround?"

   "Not really, but I did prep up their network htere.  They didn't know
heads from tails before I arrived.  Half the time they couldn't work
properly.  Can you imagine what a customer thinks of a company that sells
networks and can't get it's own network straight?  Jeez, you can't imagine
how hard it was to teach them to... Sorry, got carried away.  Anyway, I
earned my spurs there so..." I said, not caring to finish.  I could see her
eyes were glued to those Black and Gold packs on her lap.

   "Mind if I try one of these?" she asked.

   "Sure, I didn't buy them to keep them under glass.  They're yours and
you know how I feel about it." I replied.

   "Which one do I try first?  I had the biggies yesterday.  Let's see what
the kid cigars are like.  Honey, could you take the time?  I want to see
how long it takes to smoke one." She said, already fumbling with a pack of
the small ones.

   "Nine minutes and some change." I said after she stubbed the first one
out.  "Did you like it?" "Mmmh, delicious.  A bit sharper than the big
ones, but I don't mind.  Still a lot better than plain cigarettes.  Jeez, I
started ripped off filters off the Reds, but it didn't get much better, the
taste was awful and I had flakes on my tongue and all that.  I mean, I
wouldn't mind a non-filter ciggie once in a while.  After all my little
Blackies don't have a filter either, but the plastic tip keeps the worst
out of my mouth.  Possibly, I could get used to some Pall Malls for a
change if..." she said leaving this to float in the air, no doubt expecting
me to draw the right conclusion.

   "Guess I'll see some popped out eyes tomorrow in the smoking room. 
Though, apart from the color and of course the sweet smell, they don't look
much different from a cigarette in a short holder." She added

   Need I add, we had another round of smoky sex that night?  These sweet
cigars just did the trick.  They lasted long enough to do away with the
disconcerting problem of having to stub out and light up all the time and I
found the second hand smell much better then that from cigarettes.