Note: This story was dynamically reformatted for online reading convenience. Title : A Higher Love Author : MeatBot Keywords : Brother/Sister Incest, MF Date : 20150701 Mail : meatbot777 at gmail dot com This story : HTML - http://www.kristensboard.com/forums/index.php?topic=25777.0 text - /files/Authors/MeatBot/AHigherLove%20-%20Inc%20MF.txt My other stories : HTML - http://www.kristensboard.com/forums/index.php?action=profile;u=26255 text - /files/Authors/MeatBot/ Synopsis : A man rekindles his childhood affair with his older sister. Disclaimer : Copyright by the author. Permission is granted to archive, repost, or publish in no-cost or low-cost archives, periodicals, anthologies of this type of material if unaltered and attributed to the author. This is a work of fiction. You must be 18 or over to read this story. In real life, incestuous relationships, particularly when an under-aged person is involved with a parent or adult, often causes deep psychological damage. This story is provided for entertainment purposes only. The author does not condone any sexual activity with persons under 18 in real life. These are just words, people. Just words. If you have a problem with words see a competent shrink or an English teacher. This story took me longer to write than anything I've done so far, and even longer to decide to post it. Sorry if it's kind of goopy. --==+==- Read this first : http://www.kristensboard.com/forums/index.php?topic=22465.0 --==+==- Follow your heart, not the law. -- Steven L. Sheppard, Byblis And Caunus --==+==- Elenora is my older sister. To simply say that I love her is an understatement. I love her because she's my sister, of course, but I've also come to love her a lot more than that, for a variety of reasons. Way more than simple love. I grew up with her, out on a farm, and my childhood memories of her are beautiful and sensual, even before they had any reason to be. I worshiped her, from a young age, and she seemed to have a special place for me in her heart. She always treated me like an equal, not just a little brother. We're not even two years apart in age, so I guess that's not that big a deal... we always seemed like equals. When I was in my early teens, I entered into a loving, physical relationship with her, through a series of... not exactly accidents, but things that just kind of fell in place, and guided us in that direction. She was a lonely love-starved teenager, as I think I was, and maybe it was just convenient or something... but there seemed to be more than that to it... there seemed to be a rightness, an almost cosmically guided goodness to it. We seemed to fit well together, as corny as it sounds. To me, we seemed made for each other. For maybe two years, she crept into my bed at night, and we stole moments down at the barn or the pond. I loved her with a yearning desperation that I still, to this day, cannot adequately describe in simple words. She was my whole life. The cruelest blow life ever dealt to me was when I finally realized and had to accept the fact that our little affair was over. I don't blame her. I understand. It just couldn't go on, there was only one place left for it to go, and I think she just couldn't see taking that step, with me, her brother. She was saving herself for marriage, I think, an old fashioned concept, but a popular one, in the 70's. And I think she thought that what we did wasn't right, in the eyes of god and man. I knew that, but I didn't care. I loved her more than life, as I have ever since. I hope she hasn't borne a life-long burden of guilt, over what we did. I certainly have not. The intervening years were hard on me. I married, at long last, in my thirties, a short two-year experiment that ended in failure and bitterness. Ellie married twice, and, although I think she did better than me, in the end, I think she was left unsatisfied. We never talked... about the things we did, as teenagers. I have no idea why... I guess because she never brought it up. I would have been more than willing, hell, I would have loved to talk about it, but I respected her silence. For years I had no real idea how she felt about what we did back then. I had always hoped she remembered our time together with pleasure... I know I did. I have nothing but happy memories of her and her sweetness. My physical relationship with her was the high point of my life, something I have thought of with pleasure every day of my life. She was my religion, as goofy as it sounds... she was the thing that made my life bearable. Even though those things happened long ago, just those simple memories got me through a lot. I would, and I've said this before, I would start again with her in an instant. I would bury myself in her and never come up. I basically worshiped her from afar, pretty much my whole life. I made excuses to be with her, to do things with her, just because I loved her company. Because I still loved her, and always will. She is burned into my mind in a way I can't explain, because I don't understand. She is my definition of love. Brothers and sisters have a built-in intimate love that seems to transcend simple love, to me. There is an intimacy, from years of being together, that is impossible to achieve with someone you've just met, or even known for a few years. I was already fairly intimate with her body, from just being with her 24/7 and wrestling and rough-housing with her. I knew her feel and her smell. My first honest orgasm was from thinking of her, for god's sake. She was burned into my mind. I never again achieved the level of intimacy I knew with her, even though I craved it. I never came close, not with any girlfriend, or god forbid, the heartless bitch I stupidly married. No one did it for me like Ellie did. So, that's the way it's been, for the last thirty years, or so. I saw her every chance I got, and my heart still went in my throat, whenever I did. I loved her from a distance. I hoped she knew that I still loved her, that I still craved her. I assumed she did, but I didn't slobber over her, although I wanted to. My parents lived well into old age, my dad passing first. Several years later my mother also passed, and the family dissolved, to an extent, without the strong central figures in the middle. I still saw Ellie quite often, we lived in the same city, but I didn't see her several times a week like I'd gotten used to. I missed her. I hungered for her. I'd see her every day, if I could. Every hour. Once a chance came up to travel to a lake in Arkansas named Beaver Lake where my aunt and uncle maintained a cabin. The date approached, and I found out that Ellie was going also. I was, of course, overjoyed, though at this time I expected nothing more than spending some simple time with her. I had given up hope long ago of anything more. On impulse I called her, and asked if she'd like to ride with me. She agreed, and I made plans to pick her up at her house that Friday afternoon. I did, and she was ready. We put her suitcase in the trunk, and set off on a six hour road trip. The subject rose, innocently enough. There had been a recent scandal in the family, concerning one of my cousins, a webcam, and his daughter's bedroom. He was in jail now because of it. He had not only violated his daughter's privacy, he had broadcasted child porn on the internet. We traded information, seeing if our stories matched. She was silent for a few miles. "Well," I finally said. I wasn't even thinking of the two of us, of what we'd done so long ago. "Every family has skeletons in their closet. Everybody has something to hide." "Yeah," she said, nodding. She seemed thoughtful. A few more miles passed. "Russ..." she said, hesitantly. I looked away from the road for an instant, and met her eyes. I was shocked to see tears streaming down her face. "Ellie, baby!" I said. I almost pulled off the road. "What's wrong?" "Nothing!" she said fiercely, pulling a handkerchief from her purse. "Nothing! Never mind!" "Oh, baby!" I said. I felt bad for her. It still wasn't clicking in my head, for some reason. A few more miles passed. I looked at her. "I'm okay," she said, nodding. A dozen miles passed. I didn't forget about it and I wondered what she'd been thinking about. I knew it wasn't our cousin Bill and his plight. She cleared her throat. I looked at her, out of the corner of my eye. She was staring at me. Shit, this stuff is hard to do when you're driving, I thought. "Russ," she said hollowly. "Yes?" I answered. "What..." she paused a long time. "What do you remember... about us... long ago?" I knew instantly what she was talking about. Shit, I thought. Now? After all these years? Now she wants to talk about it? I had wanted to talk about it from day one, but I'd understood her reticence. I wasn't sure if she was ashamed of what we did or not... but I felt like to her it was over. The time for talk had passed. She had moved on. I was unwilling to move on, unwilling to leave behind the happiest moments of my life. "Ellie," I finally said. In my mind, I was screaming at myself, don't fuck this up, don't fuck this up! I wanted to tell the absolute truth to her... I felt like I had to, after all she'd been there, and I felt like she'd understood me completely at the time. And, there was just no need to lie. Maybe to tone it down a little, the intensity I'd felt at the time, and still felt... but not to lie. "Ellie, I remember everything. I'm sorry if there's things you want me to forget, but I cannot. I remember most of all, being happier than I've been, at any point in my life. I remember loving you more than I've loved anything in this world. I remember joy, and peace, and the harmony of two minds almost completely in sync. I've chased that feeling my whole life, and never found it again. Not even come close..." "Stop!" she said, and I did. I looked at her, trying to stay on the road. Tears were streaming down her face, and I felt my own start. "I'm sorry," I said, "I didn't mean to upset you. It's just that..." "You didn't," she interrupted. "I just... I just feel... responsible..." "Ellie," I said, frustrated. "You aren't. You weren't. You shouldn't feel that way. I think what we had, what we felt for each other was totally consensual. And I wouldn't trade it for all the money in the world. It is... precious to me. Like I said, I was happier than any other time in my life. I wouldn't trade that for anything." She sighed, and we were silent for a while. I wondered if she would want to go on, to talk more about this. I hungered to talk about this, I wanted to re-visit those old memories... and I wanted her to know how I still felt about her. How I still felt about her... I didn't feel any different than I did thirty odd years ago, when I was tasting her sweetness. I would, in a second, take up where we left off. I have never felt any different. I feel like I know and understand why she ended it, it almost had to end, we were burning each other up. I certainly was... I had wondered, a million times over the years, if her love for me was just as strong, if she'd just realized she had to end it. How did she still feel about me? I wondered. I knew she hadn't stopped loving me. But how strong was it? I felt like she had just done what she felt like had to be done. It couldn't have kept on, the way it was. We were at the brink, when she slowly, carefully ended it, we were at the brink of making love. There was no other place to go. We had stood inches from the edge, kissed one last time, and walked away. In separate directions. It had been the hardest thing in my life, to give her up, although it had taken me months to realize it was happening. She carefully tapered me down to nothing. I think she knew she had to, I would have died if she had just yanked herself away from me all at once. I felt like I almost died anyway. There were times when I certainly wanted to die, when I knew it was over. The last few years I lived at home were an exquisite torture, until she finally married and moved out. I would lay in bed, remembering the smells and tastes of her body, while she lay in another bed, literally just a dozen feet away. Sometimes she was the first thing I'd see in the morning, and the last thing I'd see at night. I know she probably got tired of my longing gazes and hungry glances, but that was all I did. I respected her choice, I respected the distance she'd placed between us. I had to. I loved her enough to let her go, as goofy as that sounds. All this raced through my mind, all this and more. I saw a rest area sign, and pulled off. I parked and killed the motor. She opened her door, we exited and we made use of the facilities. We returned to the car. I didn't start it. "Ellie," I said. "I'm sorry if this woke painful memories, and I will understand any future reticence you may have about talking about it. But it was part of us, part of what made us what we are. It happened. I cannot forget the love and the joy that I felt, and I cannot feel any different about you. I'll understand if you never want to speak of it again, but thanks... thanks for bringing it up, and for letting me say this." She just sobbed, and smashed her face into my shoulder. I turned and held her as well as I was able. She cried for twenty solid minutes, I know because I looked at the clock on the dashboard. It didn't bother me, though, well, I hated to see her cry, but I felt like I understood her emotional state... though I wondered why this hadn't come out before. We'd spent time alone in the past, and this had never come up. What was special about this time? No idea. "Russ," she finally said, her voice low and rough. "You must think I'm crazy. But I gotta get this stuff out, it's been eatin' on me for thirty years. Please, please understand..." "I think I do, Ellie," I said. "I did not mean to... to torture you, all this time." "You haven't... I have tortured myself, sometimes, but you are not responsible in the slightest for that. I still feel nothing but love for you." She sobbed again. She leaned further and further down in my lap. I'm sure it wasn't comfortable, what with the center console poking into her side. "Is this our... legacy?" she finally said, snuffling. "It this all we are, two tired old people, remembering our youth?" "Ellie... if it is, if we are... at least they're happy memories..." I said. She snorted. "Sometimes I feel like that's all I have left. Memories," she said. "Sometimes I do too. Sometimes I guess it is. But, like I said, all I have is happy ones. Ellie..." and this was important to me. I had to ask. "Ellie... is it that, for you? How do you remember it?" She was silent for a moment. She leaned against me. "Yeah," she finally said. "what you said. I remember the happiness, mostly, the happiness of being in love with someone that loved me back, just as strong. I remember the joy, the sheer joy of being in love. Of being alive, and in love. Like you said, I've spent my life looking for that." "Yeah," I said, nodding. "And never found it," she said heavily. "Yeah," I said again. "Same here." "Russ..." she said. I looked down at her. She went on. "Most of all... do you feel... do you feel like what we did was wrong? I know what Mom and Dad would have thought... and pretty much everybody else in the world... but do you feel that way? Even a little?" "Not no but hell no," I said. "To this day, the... rightness of it is strong in my mind. What we had transcended morality... I can't really explain it... but the love I felt for you... and still do... is stronger than some silly law. Ellie... what we had was stronger than steel... you felt it, you know... what we had was stronger than some silly law, whether made by god or man..." "Yeah," she said. "I'd like to think that, too." "I do think that. We had something special, something stronger than ninety nine point nine percent of the loves in the world... maybe just one or two millionths from one hundred percent..." "Trust a mathematician..." she said, giggling through her tears. "Yeah..." I said. "Honestly, you have to admit... we had a strong love." "Yeah," she said. She was silent. I prayed that she wasn't through. I wanted to talk with her for hours about this. I wanted to get around to the subject of how I felt, now. "Russ..." she said, "you gotta... please... you gotta understand why I had to end it..." The tears came again for both of us. "I do, honey," I said, "I do completely. It broke my heart, but I understood then, and I understand now. You did the right thing. We had backed ourselves into a corner, by then." "Yeah..." she said, "you gotta know... it broke my heart... I almost died... I wanted to die, but I had to do it..." "Yeah," I said, "I'm sorry, baby. I'm so sorry." "I'm sorry too," she said, sighing. I looked down at her. Ellie was one of the most beautiful girls in the world, and the grew up into a beautiful woman. She still held it, even though she was in her mid fifties. Her skin was flawless, firm and pliant. Sure, she had a few wrinkles here and there, who wouldn't, at that age. But she'd stayed out of the sun, and took care of herself. Her body was in good shape, once again sure she had a few extra pounds, but she took pride in herself, I think, and took care of herself. I had seen men glance at her, and then glance back, even in the times recently I'd been out with her. She still had it. She glowed. Usually beauty is fleeting, but hers had held well. She hadn't burned the candle at both ends... she had held onto that most elusive of things, beauty. But, then... I admit I'm biased... "Well," she said. "This has been interesting. I had no idea, no intention of bringing this to light, after all these years. I just wanted you to know I'd been thinking of it, lately. And I wanted to apologize to you." "I understand," I said. "And I'm glad it came up. There's nothing to apologize about, though. And a day hasn't passed that I've thought of about it, and of you. I'm glad you gave me a chance, after all these years... a chance to say... I still love you." "I still love you, Russ..." she said. I wasn't sure she'd understood me, though. "Ellie," I said. "I mean I still love you, like I did then. Just as much. It's just like... it's just like it was only yesterday, instead of thirty years ago." "Yeah," she said, "I know what you mean. I gotta say I feel that way too. I've always felt like... we could... just like no time had passed." "Darlin'," I said. "You've felt like that? Why didn't you say something?" My heart was almost bursting. I felt like... I felt like there was a chance, now. "Russ..." she said. I looked down at her. She was basically laying in my lap, the steering wheel at her left ear. She looked up at me, meeting my gaze squarely. She finally continued. "Russ, let's not be silly... not at our age... not now. We can't, you know we can't... we probably shouldn't even be talking about it. Come on, we can't." I was silent. I felt like I was walking on eggshells. I didn't want to fuck it up, at this stage. I felt like there was now a chance, a slight chance. I wondered how she really felt, in spite of what she'd said. She'd basically said she felt the same way I did. I hoped that that was true. I started the car. I drove the next hundred miles with her in my lap. We were silent, and when I looked down I saw that she was asleep. I woke her when we hit Eureka Springs, and we looked for a place to eat. We had a nice meal, and all seemed as normal as could be. I didn't bring it up, and neither did she, but to me, it seemed to loom over us like a giant thundercloud. I wondered how the rest of the week was going to go. I made myself a promise not to moon over her and to let her enjoy herself. I wondered if she had talked it out of her system, or if there was more to come. We finally got to the cabin about nine that night, and everyone was glad to see us. There was quite a crowd, but the cabin was built for this, and large with lots of rooms. Hours after midnight we all settled down, and my cousin showed me my bed in the basement, a small room with two double beds. Ellie was somewhere upstairs. I fell into bed, happier than I'd been for a long time. We hadn't spoke privately for the rest of the evening, but that was okay. Maybe there would be time. And there was always the trip home. The weekend passed comfortably. We had plans to stay until next Thursday or Friday but nothing was set in stone. More people showed up, mostly cousins of ours, and our little sister and her family. We cooked out that evening, and the kids skied and played in the water down at the dock. That night we all went to bed a little earlier, and I'd just stripped when I heard someone coming down the stairs. I put my pants back on, and was surprised to see Ellie, carrying her suitcase. "I gave Anna's bunch my room," she said, "I told them I'd stay down here with you. Do you mind?" "Of course not," I said, my mind buzzing. What the hell does this mean? I thought. How could she not think this meant something to me? Did it mean something? Was it just convenient? I wondered what it looked like to the others. Would they care? We were brother and sister, sure, but we were male and female, too. My family is funny, it certainly has it's share of religious nuts, thanks to my parents. My little sister's family is much stricter than Ellie and I had turned out. They studiously avoided any hint of impropriety. What the hell, I thought. I don't care what they think. I was glad she'd done it. We got her situated on one of the beds, and we got ready for bed. There was a small tub-less restroom in the basement, and she brushed her teeth and did her nighttime ablutions, and returned to the room. "Ready?" she said, and I nodded. She turned out the light, and it was pitch black. I heard her taking her clothes off, preparing for bed. All I had on was underwear, I was already in bed. I heard her crawl into bed. I realized that this week was going to be hard on me. I could smell her, for god's sake. I was pretty pumped up. "G'nite, Russ," she said. "G'nite, Ellie," I said. There was silence for a few moments. I wanted badly to talk some more about us. But I decided not to push her, the first night. There'd be time, later. It would come up, surely it would come up. It was late, anyway. Time crawled. I could not sleep. I heard every movement she made, tossing and turning. I could hear her breathing, even. I knew she was barely four feet away. It was just like the clock had turned back thirty-five years. I wanted to touch her so bad I couldn't stand it. She snuffled. I lay there and just listened to her, loving her like I had gotten used to over the years, from a distance. I heard a tiny almost whining noise. I listened, holding my breath. I threw back the sheets, and crawled out onto the floor on my knees. In moments I was at the side of her bed, feeling for her in the darkness. I had finally realized the noises I'd been hearing for some time were her crying. I reached for her, and finally got my arms around her upper body. "Oh, baby, baby, baby," I said, "What's the matter? What's wrong?" "Nothin'," she said, almost petulantly, "go back to bed." "Uh uh," I said, "just let me hold you, baby," and I did. She struggled for a moment, but then she stopped, and lay there placidly as I hugged her to my chest. She cried for I have no idea how long. Just feeling her in my arms and smelling her was heaven to me, and the feeling and memories of holding her in my arms so long ago clogged my mind. Her head was right below me, and I leaned down and kissed her softly on the top of her head. "Russ... this was a mistake..." she said softly, and I knew what she meant. She meant her coming down here, and staying with me. "No, Ellie, it wasn't. Nothing's gonna happen, nothing you don't want," I kissed her again. "That's what I'm afraid of," she said, sighing. Oh shit, I thought. My heart was beating wildly, first from my proximity to her, and now what she said. What it sounded like. Oh, let it happen, I prayed. Let it happen. Beating? My heart was singing. "Baby," I said. "Don't feel bad. Don't fight it, if that's the way you feel." She sighed again, and just laid there. I was content to hold her until the end of the world. That would have been enough. After many long minutes, I realized she was asleep. I fought with my conscience about crawling in bed with her, but I finally just sat there on the hard floor, and held her. Luckily the bunk was low to the ground. I laid my head down on her chest, and the next time I looked up the sun was coming through the small window up near the ceiling. "Oh, shit," I said, trying to rise, and finally succeeding. I heard her giggle below me. "Did you really spend the night on the floor?" she said, and I nodded. I was getting to old for shit like that. "I'm sorry..." she said, and I pooh-poohed her. Surely I could stand a night on the floor. It wasn't her fault, anyway. I pulled my pants on. She got up, looking cute and sexy in a little nightgown, and disappeared into the bathroom. I made use of the privacy, changed my undies, and put my pants back on. We were finally done with bathroom stuff, and we went up the stairs, where I smelled breakfast being cooked. The day gently passed. It was dreamy and idyllic at the cabin, and I was comfortable and at ease with every one there. We drove around the lake in the boat, and just helped the kids have a good time. The kids set off fireworks that night, and we adults sat in lawn chairs and watched. Ellie sat next to me, and my left hand was hanging down, in the space between our chairs. At some point that night, I felt her hand brush mine, she had dropped her hand down, as I had. Once she realized my hand was down there, hidden in the darkness and the space between the chairs, she seized it, and we silently held hands the rest of the evening. Once again, just to feel her hand in mine would have been enough, I told myself. We had a weenie roast, and once again, well after midnight, we all toddled off to bed. I stripped and crawled in bed while Ellie was in the bathroom. I was surprised when she returned, she was just wearing panties and her bra. She had left the bathroom light on, and the door open. I could see her with no problem. It was intensely sexual to me, to see her as bare as I'd seen her in thirty-five years, but I controlled myself. She sat on the edge of her bed, and looked at me. "Are you gonna stay in bed tonight?" she asked, smiling. "I dunno..." I said, "you got a better offer?" I winced... that sounded kind of... gauche and improper. She just smiled. "I'll try and let you get a little sleep tonight," she said, crawling under her sheet. I was almost sad. But I had ideas. "Ellie..." I said. "What we talked about on the way down... thanks again... I needed that, I needed... closure, or something." "Closure?" she said, almost sounding puzzled. "You almost sounded like... uhm... okay, closure..." "If that's my only choice," I said. "I'll take whatever you give me. If it's closure, so be it." She laughed, short and sharp, and was silent for a while. "We can't," she sighed. I looked at her. "We just fuckin' can't," she said again. I nodded. "If that's what you think... it's not what I think, but if that's what you think..." I said. I didn't really want to pressure her, and I wanted her to be comfortable with me. I sure didn't want to send her fleeing back upstairs to the couch or something. But I almost felt like... I almost felt like she wanted me to talk her into it. "It's not what I wanna think..." she said. I nodded to myself. Good. It was just a matter of making her see it the way I saw it, a way to somehow allow her to justify it in her mind. "Ellie..." I said, "Why not? Who will know? We're just a couple of old maids. We could even move in together, for cryin' out loud. No one would know, or care." "Russ..." she almost seemed wistful, "how could we? How could we not just burn each other up, again?" "Ellie... we're older, and we know the risks and the rewards. We'd just take it slow and easy, and take up where we left off. The rightness of it will still be there. I think it will seem natural." "Oh, shit," she said. "I did not mean to start this. I did not come on this trip with this shit in mind." "Neither did I," I said, "but it's happened. And it will be right, you'll see." She sighed again. We lay there for a few minutes. I knew her mind was working. I felt more hope than ever... but at the same time, I told myself not to get my hopes up, too high. That this would work out, after all these years... was pretty improbable, I thought, when I thought about it. And I didn't want to jinx it. "Russ..." she finally said. I made a noise. "Okay... how 'bout this... just for this week, just for this vacation... just at night... let's try it, and see how it works. If it seems right and good, like you say, then we'll worry about it, when we get home. But can we please go slow and easy, like you said?" My heart just almost exploded. This was more than I'd ever expected, and way quicker. I thought I'd have to argue for hours. I didn't answer. I just threw the sheet back, and held out my arms. My bed was bigger, anyway. She sat there for a moment, frozen, and then just almost literally jumped on top of me. I wrapped my arms around her, and hugged her to my chest. We both cried, for probably twenty minutes. I cried for relief, I don't know why she did. We had both cried a lot, lately. And then. The moment I'd waited thirty eight years for. I knew it was thirty eight, I'd done the math today. I was fourteen, the last time I kissed her. Well, hell, of course I've kissed her a million time, over the years, but not like this one. Not in a hell of a long time. I put my hands on the back of her neck, and pulled her mouth to mine. She was sweet and good, and tasted like Crest. I touched her lips with my tongue, and her lips opened, like they had so long ago. More tears dripped down my cheeks. I was happier than I'd ever thought possible. I never thought I'd hold her in my arms again, like this. I certainly never dreamed I'd be kissing her again, really kissing her, and touching her tongue with mine. "Ellie..." I whispered, my voice weepy and shaky, "I love you. I love you, I love you. Goddam but I love you. Let me love you." "Oh, shit..." she whispered back, "I love you too. Please... make love to me... if nothing else, make love to me..." "What you mean if nothing else?" I laughed. I intended on doing just that, that and more. I wanted to do everything with her. I wanted to consume her, and be burned up in her. I wanted to die in her arms. I hoped to, someday. Our lips smashed together, again and again. Yeah, I thought, slow and easy. She almost seemed frenzied, and that's how I felt, too. I felt like we were making up for lost time. A lot of lost time. "Oh, baby," I said, tears in my eyes again. This was going to be difficult. It was difficult to say anything to her, without crying. I unsnapped her bra, and she pulled it off and threw it in the floor. I felt her moving around, as she kicked her panties down and off. I yanked my undershorts down. "Chuck and Lisa are right above us," she whispered, her voice hot in my ear. "We gotta be quiet." I knew that. I didn't know if I could, but I knew that. I pressed my mouth to hers again. I slid my hands beneath her arms, and seized her wonderful tits. My god, I thought, my god... time stands still... they were just like I'd remembered, all those years ago... high and firm... almost hard... and her nipples, god... they were a little fuller and fatter, I knew she'd had two kids... I wished I could have sucked on them then. I had a lot of time to make up. I pressed my face into her chest, and sucked away. The one thing that had gotten me off the most, all those years ago, was burying my face in her sweet pussy. I had waited almost a whole summer for that, and when I finally got to do it, it was everything I'd hoped for, and more. To do it again, after all these years... I wasn't sure I could stand it. I slid down her stomach, and surveyed my kingdom. And... jeezus... the first taste of her... I mean, pussy is pussy... but the fact that it was her... it was sweet, and nostalgic, and good god I cried yet again. I buried my face in her cunt and sobbed. She tasted better than anything the last... hell the last thirty eight years had tasted. I smashed her clit with my tongue, stuck my tongue in her slit, licked her asshole, and cried. I have no idea how long we fucked around for, that first time. I'm sure it was two or three in the morning before I finally pulled her body up and against me. I was exhausted, but pleasantly. I was greatly anticipating what I knew was next. "Baby," I said, kissing her. "It's time..." "Yeah," she said. She seemed content just to huddle in my arms. "We're sure?" I said, although I knew we were sure. "Hell yeah," she said, laughing. "I've waited thirty eight fucking years for this," I reminded her. "I hope... I hope it's worth it to you..." "It will be." I wasn't worried. I knew it would be. I rolled us over, to where she was on bottom. She spread her legs so wide her knees hung off the side of the bed. I nestled in the middle of her, holding myself over her body with my knees and my arms. "Baby," I whispered, my nose touching hers. "Baby, I love you!" "I love you!" she whispered fiercely, and we smashed our lips together, again. I moved my body around until I felt my cock rubbing against her pussy hair. She finally reached down with one hand, and guided my cock to the mouth of her cunt. "Oh, baby..." I said, dripping tears onto her face. I pushed gently into her body. She was wet, and nice and tight for somebody that had pushed two kids through. She gave me chills. I hit bottom pretty quick (I'm no John Holmes) and pulled out, and stabbed into her again. She gasped and sucked air, and away we went. To finally get something, after waiting so long, is satisfying but often leaves you feeling a little let down. This time it didn't, at least. I was happy and satisfied and enjoyed myself greatly. She felt unreal beneath me. I kept reminding myself what I was doing, and who, like I didn't know. It did feel a little unreal, after all this time. It's this simple? I kept asking myself. How fast it had fallen together. I almost kicked myself for not bringing the subject up years ago. Had I wasted years and years, when I could have had her? Well, that's foolish to speculate on. What's done is done. I was just happy, to be, at long last, back in love with her. I had no doubt about it. Just a week? I thought. No way. I could already tell from the way she was acting. This was the logical culmination of a lifetime of our love for one another. This quick, I had almost no doubt that we'd be together from here on. It had always felt like we were made for each other. It had always felt right. And it felt right this time. I pumped faster and harder and she finally came, making so much noise that she finally clapped her own hand over mouth and giggled as she came down from her orgasm. I smothered her with kisses, and finally we rolled back over and I held her body on top of mine and hugged her to me. This has to last, I told myself, I cannot live this time if it doesn't. "Russ," she whispered, her breath hot in my ear, "This is right. What you said, this is the right thing to do. I love you. I love you." "Oh, baby," I whispered back, "I love you. I love you forever. This is forever, this time. I will not let you go." "I will never ask you to," she whispered, and we kissed again. --==+==- The rest of the week was a dizzy whirlwind of doing family stuff during the day, and fucking our brains out at night. We both got used to taking afternoon naps, we missed so much sleep at night. It was not difficult to hide our re-awakened affair from the family, and they knew we'd always been close... it worked out fine, I just had to remember not to kiss her or squeeze her boobs when the others were around. One of my cousin's kids did catch us once, behind the boat shed stealing a kiss, but I don't think it really clicked with her that we were brother and sister. I drove Ellie home on cloud nine, wondering how radically my life was going to change, now that we were in love again. It's been two years since then, and things have changed. It hasn't always been easy, but it hasn't been impossibly hard by any stretch. Our love makes up for a lot. I have lived alone all but two years of my adult life, and I was used to being alone, but having her around hasn't been a burden. She is sweet and thoughtful and her love shines through in everything she does. I sold my house and moved in with her, and to my knowledge no one suspects. I have my own room, with a bed I've never slept in. My mom was the most perceptive person I ever knew, and I've wondered at times if she would have been able to tell... who knows. We have gotten used to only truly being ourselves when we are alone. Ellie has told her closest girlfriend, who has been nothing but supportive of us. God forbid that our little sister ever finds out, that is our only really great fear. I am happy. I hope to hell she is happy, she seems to be, and we hardly ever even cry any more. Every night I hold her and hug her, and sometimes we make long slow gentle love. I still don't like getting old, but she takes the edge off. My only regret is that everyone in the world can't know how much I love her. That is my legacy. I love her. --==+==- IF YOU LIKED THIS STORY, LEAVE ME A COMMENT. HELL, LEAVE ME A COMMENT EVEN IF YOU DIDN'T LIKE IT. THANKS FOR READING. http://www.kristensboard.com/forums/index.php?action=profile;u=26255