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 I Have Been Sharing My Wife for 13 Years

   It was 1995.  I can still remember how I met Lisa.  Well, everything
about behind how I met her is one hell of a story to tell.  Our
relationship has been amazing, fascinating and exciting, all at the same
time...  right from the start.

   I met her in a bar through Vic (I worked there as an interval as a DJ).
Vic used to be a friend of mine, but he is now living the married life in
Malaysia where he has been for over fourteen years.

   Though Vic and I were friends, we also have (on each side) some other
friends the other didn't actually know personally.  During those times,
Lisa was the girlfriend of Oscar, one of Vic's other friends.  Lisa had a
special appeal about her that made me like her.

   A couple of months later, the Oscar guy flew out of the country and said
he would be settling abroad.  Vic had once mentioned to me about his own
interests in Lisa, and absurdly, he pursued her the very opportunity he
had, and later got Lisa for his own.

   Then not a month later, Vic told me that Lisa even moved into his
apartment with him.  They lived together for almost seven months.  Vic
finally told me that the arrangement (or living-in together) was actually
only an `open relationship' for the both of them.

   Though I didn't actually doubt my friend's account, I wasn't sure
whether he was telling the truth, or just making fun on how he would like
to convince me to believe it.  Then I started seeing Lisa with some other
guys in different occasions, places and some other bars that other friends
of mine and she invited me to.

   Well it's fair enough I once told my friend.  But I left him with my
belief in that `open relationship' and not with the `swinging', `voyeurism'
and `sharing' type of matters he was later trying to convince me about.

   Though I'd already been a `porn' fan during those times, I wasn't yet
aware of the other subject matters.  Then again, Lisa was literally living
a hot sexual life with my friend in his apartment, while taking pleasure or
having the most out of that `open relationship' with other guys in their
own beds.

   Honestly, all of those issues had never actually come between us, or
bothered me when I started to feel something special for her a few months
after my friend Vic went to Malaysia to work overseas.  Though my feelings
for her those times were much unexpected, it was rather superficial in a
way.  My focus of attention towards her did not involve pursuing her yet.

   We had already been acquainted before, and we would sometimes go or hang
out with other friends at bars and discos.  I was courting, or kinda dating
someone, while she was either asked out or would later hang out with us...
introducing a guy as her boyfriend, but would still go out with other guys.


   I finally realized that it was much better for me to pursue the woman I
already knew.  Well Lisa was definitely single, I said, trying to convince
myself.  I tried asking her out on a date many times, and she didn't
disappoint me.

   It was pretty much obvious that I was courting her.  The first week of
November actually had been very exciting, and I was overwhelmed by her
acceptance of my request for a date.  But she made it clear that all she
could offer me for the time being was, like she and my friend Vic had, an
`open relationship'.

   Thinking about nothing else, it was kinda hard to have Lisa as my
girlfriend (unofficial to be exact, because of the `open relationship'
thing) not because someone, some guy or some other men were still having
sex with her at the same time.  It was hard because, I wanted our times
together be more permanent.

   I mean, though I'm not against her explicit affairs, I wanted her and my
relationship to last.  Later during the third week, Lisa made me understand
the nature of her situation.  I was very shocked of course.  Her frankness
was something I was not used to.

   I was very confused when she told me that she actually had a steady
live-in partner when she and Vic first got introduced to each other.  Oscar
hadn't actually become her boyfriend.  Indeed, Lisa admitted that she and
Oscar had sex many times.  But later by the end of the day, she was still
trying to fix up her failing relationship with her live-in partner.

   I queried back about her times with my friend, Vic.  She said that she
only took a few clothes and things over to Vic's apartment, but was still
going back home to her real partner.  Many things had happened between her
and my friend Vic, she said.

   Like during all of her previous relationships (not to mention her first
live-in relationship), she was already into swinging.  She spoke out
casually as she told me every little detail about those sensuous escapades
she had with other guys.

   At first it was very nerve wrecking for me.  But I really couldn't
explain the feelings I had inside.  I only knew that I wanted to be with
her all the time, and that alone would make me feel happy.

   I had fallen for Lisa.  I was overjoyed when Lisa confessed her own
intimate passion toward me.  I really can't describe how happy I was when
she told me she loved me so much.

   We simply talked and talked...  pretty much everything about ourselves,
and how we could settle and straighten things out for the future.  Well, we
were so excited we even passed talking about marriage.  So I made
everything clear for her and told her that she wouldn't regret loving me.

   Lisa smiled at me and told me that she never will, not ever.  I honestly
felt the sincerity within her when she paid respect on my `DOs' and
`DON'Ts'.  Then I told her that nothing changes anything.  I told her that
I would not be the cause of making her less happy, nor prevent her from
doing what she felt like doing.

   Our relationship went on, disregarding and ignoring what she was.  I
never prevented her from seeing other guys.  For me, I just only wanted her
to make sure of herself...  that she really loves me.  Well, she never lied
to me during those times that she dated other guys, and that she had also
been sleeping with them.

   I told her that her having sex with other guys wasn't an issue to me. 
For me, I can't blame her for how she makes herself happily satisfied... 
if not by me alone, then with other men.

   We talked seriously about it, and settled everything carefully.  She
later even got involved with some guys who had been swinging.  I just told
her to just be careful.