It all Began as a Dream Chapter One Are you one of those guys who are sure you know what you want? You think you desire to serve a beautiful woman in any way she desires. You fantasize about this night and day. You may even be obsessed with the fantasy. Well, believe me when I say there is a tremendous difference between your fantasy and what will happen to you if you are ever unlucky enough to live what you believed you wanted. This is written from experience. I am a single white male. Fifty-eight years old. I have the body of a seventy-eight year old person. I lived as a slave for a very beautiful but demanding, sometimes uncaring, female for to many years. I knew Jessica for five years before I entered into the Mistress/slave relationship I was so sure would be heaven to me. Jessica was little miss everything. She was a 5'4" blonde with these incredible blue eyes, light blue, sparkling blue. They could look at you or through you, whichever she wanted them to do. They could raise you to the highest pinacle or plummet you to the lowest space on earth. Jessica grew into every guys sexual fantasy. Her ass was one to die for, I almost did. She had a tiny waist and 36 C tits with nipples that would respond to a stare. Her hourglass figure measured 36-22-36. Like every thing physical about her, perfect. Jessica had a creamy complexion that went so perfectly with her honey colored blonde ringlet curles she like to wear. Jessica was/is a flirt. She doesn't even try to be. She always has a smile to show off a pretty mouth full of perfect teeth. She was in high school when I first noticed her. I dreamed about her. I had all kinds of perverted fantasies which always played out with me being her perfect slave and being ever so close to that incredible body. Sometimes I even imagined her using me in very personable intimate ways. As these fantasies continued, I began thinking of perverse things as being normal. After a couple years of these fantasies, I saw nothing wrong with the perverted things I dreamed of doing. I had acquired her email address from a forward I received. I put her address in my address book and there it stayed for a few weeks. One night I was feeling extra horny and living my fantasy where I was a do all and be done all to slave for beautiful Goddess Jessica I typed an email to her using a fictious name and a Yahoo email address. I clicked, "send". I told her a little about what I desired. I told her how I was willing to do all kinds of things for her. She could do anything to me which gave her pleasures of body or mind. I wanted nothing in return. I only wanted to serve her. I told her my age in the email but said I lived in another town. As soon as I clicked, send, I had foreboding thoughts, yeah, I was scared. The next day I was no longer scared and rushed to check my email. There was nothing from Jessica. I sent her another one being much more explicit. I told her I desired to do all of her laundry, how I wanted to eat her panties. I stressed again how she could use my mouth and body for anything, absolutely anything, her heart desired. I checked my email again the next day. There her name was in the inbox. My pulse quicken as I quickly clicked on it. It came up so slowly, then, there it was. I wilted. It said. "Look you perverted creep, this is the second filthy email I have received from you. My dad is 6'5", muscles, a policeman, and very tough. If I ever see your pathetic name in my inbox again, I will show it to him. He will find you and your body will be mush. Got it freak!" I saw Jessica on a regular basis,like a couple times a week. I tried my best to smile and say hi. I certainly did not want her to ever suspect I was the, "Perverted creep". My fantasies continued though. They even branched off into a senario where her dad found out who I was, beat me to a pulp and took me home to my beloved Jessica where she used me for many, many perverted acts. Jessica graduated high school and went to college several miles away. She would return for holidays and school breaks. I would usually see her. Her body, well you read the description. Somehow it appeared even better. Her face was more beautiful. Made up better I suppose. She was the most beautiful person on earth. My fantasies became more frequent and more perverted, if that be possible. I thought about her all of the time. One day I got the opportunity to work in her college town for a while. I jumped at it. Hell, I would have went at my expense. My fantasy could come true, I told myself. Her email was all but forgotten, just a bad dream. I went looking for her as soon as I got to her city. I was there three days before I saw her. She was setting in a booth at a college hangout lounge. I strolled in as casually as I could and walked towards the men's room. I pretended to see her for the first time. She was all smiles, what a greeting. She got up and gave me a hug. She was wearing a perfume which I had got a scent of before when she was dressed up. I worked at getting my tongue back to its normal size and hoped it would stay in my mouth and not sneek down to her pussy of it's own volition. I noticed I was licking my lips to much as we sipped on Strawberry Daiquari's Jessica had always been so easy to talk with. It is not always easy for a forty plus year old guy and a twenty-two year old woman to talk for more then a few minutes. We were there for over an hour. I told her I would be in town for a few weeks, told her my hotel and room number. I knew she was not going to look me up though. Hell, why should she. I was just someone from her hometown. No one really. When she said she had to go. I said I had to leave also. If she was not there, there was no reason for staying. I did not say that though. I insisted on paying for all of the drinks and she readily let me do that. I know she expected me to. I learned she was good at sizing up people, especially guys. She managed to casually say she dropped in there often but never drink so much. She even said her last class was over at four tomorrow. I did not know if she meant to specifically give me that information knowing I would be back, or if it was merely casual conversation. I had more wet dreams while wide awake that night. I served my beloved Goddess in varied and perverted ways. She enjoyed me very much. We agreed that she would be a permanent fixture in my life. Til death do us part! My dream of course. I began work early so I could justify knocking off and being at the lounge as soon after four as possible. I got there at almost four-thirty. She was in the same booth but so was another girl I had never seen before. She was very pretty but not in Jessica's class. Well, no one was. I walked in. Jessica was facing the door and had seen me before I entered and did not try to be coy about it. "Hi Mr. Brown." She said in her low controlled toned voice that made her appear to be made entirely of sugar and other sweetnesses. "I told Leah about meeting someone from my old home town. I knew you would be here today. I told her how beautiful you think I am, and that you had always been an admirer of me." Jessica giggled through her many teeth revealing smile. Her blue eyes lifted me higher than I had ever been lifted before. She told me that as she gave me another hug, longer and tighter than yesterday. A lot longer. I wondered, was she doing this for me, for Leah, or for Jessica? She scooted over in the booth like it was a foregone conclusion I had come in there to be with her. We chatted. I learned Leah had been Jessica's roommate for two years. They shared everything. They were closer than sisters. Jessica also said she was having only one drink,a beer, no more. She said they had not had dinner and she only drink on ocassion. She said she would not have come today except she knew I would be there and would be soooo disappointed if she were not. I smiled as I told her how psychic she was. I paid for our beer and invited the ladies to have dinner with me. They accepted. It was obvious they had planned that sequence of events prior to our meeting. Leah said how much they loved Red Lobster but did not go very often because of a school girl's budget. Of course I took them to Red Lobster. Why not, I was in heaven. I had talked quite a bit with Jessica, but never anything like this, certainly not so intimately. I knew I was not a date. I knew I was just some harmless old dude that they could get to buy them a nice dinner. That was OK. I would have many fantasies in my mind from this meeting. I met Jessica everyday the first week. I learned she had broken up with her boy friend of almost a year the same day as our first meeting. She confided she was not interested in dating just yet. She told me how much she appreciated my company. How she was so lucky I was there for her. She mentioned things like that a lot. Our conversation got more personal all the time. I told her I got a divorce last year. I had no one either. My wife and I never had kids. She knew all that. Out of the blue she tells me about these two emails she received when she was in high school. She told me word for word exactly what I had written in the first one. "I have read them so many times! O.K. I know I am perverted! I could not believe any guy would think me so beautiful that he would literally give his health and life, give up everything for me. He sounded serious! He wanted me to use him until he was all used up then throw him away like I would an old shoe! I was frightened at first, then thinking about it started to turn me on. If he had sent another email after a month or so, I would have answered it! I am bad arn't I? Like really bad!" She gave me a small smile and a slightly wrinkled nose, as she patted my hand. What fantasies I had of her. If she had said, "I got to go pee." I would have been on the floor with my mouth open before she could get up to go to the ladies room. "Leroy," she had started calling me by my first name. "I am a lot more mature now. I have seen on the internet stuff like that. Leah and I have rented a few movies. Are there really guys like that? If there are, are all of them freaks and weirdos? Well, I guess so, they would have to be. Or would they?" She had rattled that off, never giving me a chance to answer. Silence ------- I noticed she was looking straight into my eyes. Her eyes were full of questions. My god, could she know? My heart raced. I could feel my face turning red. "Well, what do you think, Leroy?" I answered without thinking,as I have been known to do. Those emails for example. "Jessica, I can see why someone would send you such an email. I can see why some guy who was lonely would really do those things merely for the pleasure of your company. You are an incredible aphrodisiac. I could see myself saying something like that except for the fear of being totally ostracized afterwards and being a laughing stock when it spread." My god, what did I just say. Did I just say I would do those things for her? Did I just say I wanted to be used by her, be her slave? No, I just said I could see how someone else could. My face was getting redder by the second. All of a sudden it was quite warm in there. She said nothing, just looked into my eyes, right into my soul. Finally she spoke in a very serious voice. "I would accept you in a heartbeat. I know you are not really a freak, you are just infatuated with me. You always have been. You have worshipped me from a distance for years. You are still deeply infatuated with me. It's alright, I do not mind. In fact, I think it is kinda awesome." She smiled then. God, she was so beautiful. "Did you send those emails, Leroy? I will never tell anyone, I promise. Did you?" The sincere way she spoke, her honest look, I could not lie to her. I do not know why I could not, I just could not tell her a lie while gazing upon all that sincere beauty. I said nothing. I nodded my head up and down a few times. The silence was deafening. After minutes, it could have been hours, she spoke. "Do you really want to serve me? Do you truly want to be my property as long as I want you? Leroy, do you really want me to do those things to you? I can, you know. I really can. I have thought about it a lot over the years. Except for the harm I would know I was doing to such a sweet person, I could do it. I like you a lot, Leroy." As she said that she again placed her hand over mine. "Look at me. Is that what you want? If it is, I want it too. I am not the person you think I am. I am sometimes not so nice. You will not have an easy or a good life. The things you said in those emails are,---well, downright awful. I am not all sugar and spice. I don't think any of me is. Especially that part you made reference to but did not name. I know what you were saying you would be for me. You have my cellie number. Think about it. Think hard but not to long. Give me a call,if you truly want that relationship with me, I want it too. Leroy, do not tell me you do, then dump me. I would forever hate you if you did that to me. So, if you value me the way you have said and have always acted, be positive, be sure I am what you want. This is a oneway trip. A last time, maybe lifetime, offer." Without another word or gesture she slid across the booth to get up. I moved quickly to help her. I saw her panties as her ass slid acrossed the seat and she spread her lefs to exit the booth. I believed she was showing me her pantied crotch on purpose. Something to aid me in my life's decision. They were dark blue silk with a cotton lined crotch. So small a piece of cotton. So much sweetness to hide. She turned loose of my hand and walked away. I stood mesmerized maybe from what she had just said or maybe from the movement of the world's most beautiful ass as she walked away. I sat down and thought for a while. I could be so very near that ass. All I had to do was dial her number. I could taste the pussy I had had so many fantasies about. I could become an extension of her body. What a body. I could have it all, in a perverted sense. All I had to do was dial the number. I had dreamed of her feminine scent. I had dreamed of the taste of her urine. I had even fantasized about the taste of all of her body waste. I am so sick, I thought. Not of body, of mind. Now Jessica knew. She would never think of me in any other way again. Everytime we met she would always see the man who asked to be her toilet. I sat there a long time. I came to the conclusion I could either call her, or commit suicide. Was there a real difference. One would be long, the other short. I went back to my motel room. I went to bed but did not sleep. The fantasy of my being Jessica's slave had a whole new meaning. Did I really want this? Could I really do it? It must be the most awful thing in the world. How could anyone really consume such foul stuff? The urine would be easy, I would do that right now and be proud to drink from her pussy. I would love kissing her ass. I would love moving my lips and tongue over her rosebud. To actually eat her pussy and have her cum on my face, to swallow it, to have my tongue in her love canal as far as I could make it go, to inhale the feminine scent of Jessica. God it must be erotic. Why did I not limit my email to those things. Why did I have to hint I would actually allow her to use me for things much more perverse. No wonder she called me a freak. I was so horny when I composed those emails. I had toilet service on my mind but now since it could become a future reality, well it was different. I looked at the clock, it was after three, I had not slept any at all. At least this was Saturday morning. I thought some more. I finally went to sleep. I woke up at 10:00. Jessica was the first thing I thought of. I showered and got dressed. I went to breakfast. Durning breakfast, I dialed her cellie.