Disclaimer: Whenever I use the words "romance," "attracted,"
"crush," and "infatuation," as well as their variations, I am
using them in a platonic sense. References to sex are platonic,
unless specifically stated otherwise. When I say "pedophile," I
am referring to an adult with a platonic attraction to children.
"Child molester" is exactly what it sounds like.



Summary: In this second of a 5-part essay, I discuss the meaning
of pedophilia, and how child molesters are different from
pedophiles.



  Now let's talk about the main reason pedophiles are so hated.
Whenever a child gets hurt--even non-sexually--it's always
"pedophile scum this, sick pedo bastard that." Usually, what they
really mean is "child molester." Then again, we ARE talking about
people who don't know the definitions of words like rape,
teenager, child, and pedophilia, and yet use them all in the same
sentence quite often. Here's the disturbing truth about
pedophiles:

  Pedophiles. Hate. Child. Molesters.

  Let's use a dictionary, shall we? A pedophile is an adult who
is sexually attracted to children. The use of word "sexually"
isn't explained, but let's say it is referring to romance, minus
sex. A child molester is an adult who rapes kids. That said, let
me spell it out in a different way. Pedophiles generally love<i/>
children. They like to see children happy. They don't want to see
them in pain. They want to give them love, protection, and
respect. And here's another plot twist for you: some have no
interest in sex. Child molesters don't need a description.

  Remember when I told you I don't watch child porn? Well, it's
not because it's illegal. It's not because I'm afraid to get
caught. It's not because it gives people like me a bad name. It's
because I (and many other pedophiles) believe that an adult
having sex with a child in real life is disgusting. Period.

  Hell, we would gladly help enforce laws that keep molesters
away from kids. We'd even create new ones that actually work
without infringing the rights of innocent people while making it
easier for real molesters to do what they do. And don't vary from
state to state. We want them dead just as badly as "normal"
people do. We get just as sick and upset from the testimonies
from victims as anyone else does.

  Yes, there are pedos who have powerful urges. Yes, there are
pedos who couldn't care less about the child's well-being. But
those are more sexual problems than a deformed orientation (for
lack of a better word). Some "normal" adults feel the same way
about other adults and may or may not go out rape people for
feeling that way. In those cases, we know it's a sexual problem.
Why look at a "normal" case any differently than that of a pedo
case? After all, "child molester" is nothing more than a rapist
with a different label. Other than who they like, the same rules
should apply.

  Pedophiles, like every other group of people, have good
individuals and bad ones. Some husbands rape their wives. Do you
think all husbands do it? Most reported child molestation cases
are committed by parents. Does that mean parents who deprive
their kids of playing outside because of the news reports about
child molesters are the real criminals? Bosses, cab drivers, and
I can go on. With that in mind, how does branding all pedophiles
as molesters make any sense?

  I can't even say child molesters make us look bad. Pedophiles
are the only type of people with an official label for "our"
rapists. Where's "homo molester" and "race molester"? When adults
rape adults, it's just rape. "Normal" people choose to put us all
in the "child molester" group they created. I don't know why when
half of the time, they just say "pedophile" as if all of us are
like that. That's their own ignorance talking, which isn't the
molesters' fault. No matter how you categorize it, rape has
little to do with who a person is attracted to, and everything to
do with them being sick enough to force others to have sex with
them.

  As a matter of fact, rapists are not always attracted to their
victims. Some straight men rape other men because they are
addicted to sex and happen to be stranded with all men. Some
pedophiles rape adults because they know that taking out their
frustrations on a child will earn a much worse punishment. Rape
is something that you do, have control over, and can get help
for. And deserve a very violent punishment for doing. Attraction
is something you can't control, but you can control the actions
associated with it. With practice, you can even choose when not
to get aroused.

  At the end of the day, pedophile is nothing more than a label.
A label that most people clearly don't know the definition of.
Seriously, why is that word used when talking about 18-year-olds
dating 17-year-olds? Why is it that some countries and states
allow adults to have sex with 16-year-olds, while doing the same
in other places makes them a pedophile? Why are people throwing
it at men who look at the half-naked teenagers walking by? Why in
the bloody blue hell do people call elderly men that for marrying
20-year-old girls? I would go into detail about how stupid that
is, but one of my pet peeves is when people go off the topic of
pedophilia to talk about attraction to young people over 12 years
old.

  I didn't find out about the pedophile label or what society
thought of it until my mid-teens. Until then, I thought the way I
felt was normal, even going as far as to nearly out myself to
friends on a few occasions by telling them when I thought a
preteen girl looked hot or opening gawking when a girl bent over.

  When I heard the supposed definition for my label--that
supposed definition being child molester--I knew even then that
it was distorted BS. Even then, I knew how stupid it is that the
official definition of a pedophile is "an adult who has a sexual
attraction to children."

  That's not something you want to use to describe yourself,
regardless of who you love. The average person isn't mature
enough for the word "sex." They think to be sexually active is to
be a slut or rapist, or obsessed with perverted jokes. Ignorant
of the fact that the word "sex" could simply stand for a loving
relationship with no intercourse at all. It's a disgrace that I
even need my disclaimer on all of these rants and have to repeat
so many points, but some people desperately need it. I can't
vouch for all of us, but some pedos would be happy with a
romantic relationship with kids, minus the sex.

  Most people hear the word "pedophilia" and instantly assume
that a person is either having sex with a child or plotting to.
Many, including some pedos, think pedophilia is a fetish. I refer
to it as an orientation, but I know it really isn't. It would be
much better if there was a label for "one who is capable of
infatuation with kids." At least then, we wouldn't be damn near
calling ourselves rapists. Then again, people would mess that
label up, too.

  Rapists are the last people who need categories in the first
place. Is a label really supposed to somehow make one type better
than another? Why not stone all of the rapists to death first,
then worry about their orientation?