Road Trip				by: Jem Aura (c)


	Foreword: This story is not complete as you will notice 
towards the end of what I have here. But don't worry, it won't leave 
you hanging. I have what I think is a good basis for an extended 
story, or sequel so to speak. Comments and suggestions would be 
welcome, jem-aura@hotmail.com.  The story codes I guess would 
be Mf Mf+ cons rom.  This story is fiction. 

Main Character's foreword: I am speaking to you having lived the 
story. I am Robbie. Or so the folks down there have named me.  I 
had chanced upon a girl that changed my life. We were from 
different worlds. I was city folk, and she was deep country. But as 
the sun has already set on the story I am about to tell, I am no 
longer city folk. I have assimilated into her world. I have also 
assimilated a lot of her way of speaking. So as you read my words, 
hear them as if I were a country gentleman. 

Book One

As so often happens after falling asleep right after the last dinner 
of a hellish week, I woke up in the wee hours of Saturday morning. 
Having been too busy to have even made plans for the weekend, I 
decided to go fishing. I threw some stuff together for a day trip and 
hit the road with a fresh brewed cup of coffee. 
	By about 9 am I was way out in the middle of nowhere. I had 
stopped at a couple of streams that crossed under the highway 
with not much luck. As I drove I was hoping to find one of those 
rural gas stations that double as a bait shop: I needed a fishing 
license and some local knowledge on fishing holes. My GPS told 
me the next town had a population of 15,000, and when I slowed 
through the speed zone, to my amazement, there was a Wal-Mart.   
	I love backwater Wal-Marts. The people you see there are 
amazingly... countrified.   And the cars in the lot explain it all: Either 
ancient pickup trucks, brand new dualies, or rusted Detroit iron 
from the 70's.  And a few Caddy's and Town Cars with no 
hubcaps. 
	One such car I pulled in next to was an old black dodge with 
an ancient old couple sitting in it. It was already getting hot outside, 
and the black car shimmered in the sun. It was covered in dust like 
most of the other cars there, meaning they lived on a gravel road. 
As I looked closer, the old guy behind the wheel looked like he was 
in pain. His door was open and he had one foot on the asphalt, 
stooped over, wincing. 
	I watched a few people pass by with concerned looks and 
decided I didn't want to have a guilty conscience not attempting to 
help. In a few seconds I confirmed my fear: he was having a heart 
attack. The old lady was talking continuously, nonsensical 
gibberish, and there was a young girl lying down on the back seat. 
I packed the three of them in my crew cab as fast as I could and 
raced to the other side of town, only about a quarter mile, where I 
had seen a rural medical building on my way in. 
	I offered my giant sized 64 oz soda to the girl sitting next to 
me. She took it and her and the only lady were sucking air through 
the straw before we were half way there. If it were my grandpa 
having a heart attack, I would have offered him a drink.  
 	The staff at the medical facility quickly admitted the man after 
he had flashed his VA card, and with no waiting area, we had to sit 
in the truck.. 
	I noticed right away that the old lady was not all there. She 
was senile. The girl didn't talk much, and kept stealing glances at 
me when she thought I wasn't looking.  I tried to think how to get 
out of this mess and back on the road. 
	"Hey, where do you all live?" I asked
	The girl shrugged. 
	"Does your grandmother know?" I asked
	The girl shook her head, "She don't know nothin anymore."  
And as if to prove her wrong, the old lady reached up and bopped 
her on the back of the head. 
	"Looks to me like she does." I said
	"She don't know what we'sis sayin, maybe she knows we's 
talking bout her.  She had a stroke and caint talk neither."  The 
young girl's talk was thick with country drawl. 
	"Well, dig in her purse there and see if there's something 
with your address on it. With my GPS thing here I can bring you 
home." 
	"Yeah, we needs to be gittin home cause Joe's all alone by 
his self. He gets scairt iff'n we be gone too long.   Is papa comin 
too?" She asked
	"No, papa had a heart attack. I think he has to stay here for a 
few days at least."
	"Again?. That's the third one." She said.
	"What's your name sweetheart?" I asked
	"Tawny." She replied, but pronounced it more like 'towny'. 
	"Tawny," I repeated. "That's nice. I like that. My name's Rob."  
I lied. "Pleased to meet you Tawny."
	Tawny nodded her agreement. 
	The reason I didn't tell her my real name was that as I was 
sitting there pondering my predicament, I realized that I was 
completely anonymous. Unless someone noted down my license 
plate, no one could identify me. When I took the old man inside, 
they didn't even ask my name, and they had no idea I had his wife 
and granddaughter in my truck. I didn't go in Wal-mart so I hadn't 
bought the fishing license, and I hadn't purchased anything with my 
credit card yet either. So for no particular reason, I decided to 
remain anonymous. Well, okay, I did have a reason, but I wasn't 
likely to win the lottery that day, but it you ever want to win, you 
have to at least but a ticket.
	Ever since my marital problems began (the wife admitting to 
having an affair, and then a few years later another one), and 
especially since the divorce, I have had fantasies about vulnerable 
young girls in situations such as this. I have my suspicions why, 
something to do with evolutionary psychology, but it's such a 
complex evolution I've been through that there's no one thing that 
stands out, other than the impact on my emotional landscape due 
to her infidelity. But many men go through such ill use. I would be 
very curious to know what really knocks around behind their stoic 
facades, because the stigma of the pervert in society will zip most 
mouths closed.  And these fantasies, if you can call them that, are 
as far from abusive as you can get. I would ever hurt anyone. I'm 
not like that.   I know,  a lot of people (mostly women) believe that if 
a young girl consented to the advances of a man like me, and then 
we ended up playing some titillating sexy games together (the girl 
believing that it was as much her idea as mine) that the girl would 
be scarred for life and surely die of a drug overdose, commit 
suicide, or become a hooker.  But the reality of it is that a girl in the 
throws of puberty is an intensely sexual being. And the only 
damage that occurs to her as a result of playing titillating games is 
if some idiot finds out and makes a big stink about it, humiliating 
her and making her feel intensely guilty for putting the man she so 
adored in jail. That's what does the damage. And yes, she adored 
him! She wouldn't be playing those games believing it was all her 
idea if she didn't. Girls that age aren't stupid. I mean, they don't just 
accept the advances of the first guy that shows interest. They 
invest in the person same as anyone. It's a two way street. 
	So as I wander about the cities and countryside, I expound 
on the vulnerabilities of people. It's the natural instinctive behavior 
of the single male. I like my fictional appendices to these real life 
situations to mimic reality as much as possible, imagining situations 
that could actually occur with out too much luck or creative license 
involved. And I don't like my fantasies to end with me in Prison or 
anyone getting hurt.  So, after years of these mental exercises, 
having explored a myriad of scenarios,  I came to the sad 
realization that the chances of the planets aligning in such a way 
as to allow one of my fantasies to actually come true AND not get 
caught AND not hurt anyone - well, it's about as likely as winning 
the lottery.  
	This situation was no different. I always assume it won't work 
out - that some risk factor will enter in and ruin it like it always had. 
But I don't ever sabotage it myself. I let things unfold, following the 
path toward a hopeful conclusion, ready to abort at a moments 
notice, keeping things ambiguous until both of our toes are over 
the line, and the big joyful leap into full blown blissful surrender 
ends the ambiguity.  Keeping anonymous is simply one small way 
to reduce the risk of getting caught if something should go wrong - 
and there are always a million things that can go wrong. I never 
have been able to believe that a secret can be kept. Too many 
experiences of betrayal to trust in a secret. Anonymity is a weak 
insurance policy against a secret being told to the wrong person, 
but it's better than nothing. 
	I started the truck and pulled away with my two passengers. I 
had parked out of sight of the front windows of the medical 
building and was careful not to pull in front of them as I exited.  
Tawny was rummaging through her grandmother's purse and 
finally handed me an old electric bill. 
	Chewing on the address, the GPS guided us along creek 
beds, corn fields, pig farms, all the while kicking up gravel and a 
cloud of dust.   When the road ended I was staring at an old, 
crooked, weather beaten cabin with gaping holes in the roof. 
Attached to it was a rather large and not so old mobile home. 
	Out of the trailer came a goofy looking young man in overalls 
and a straw hat. I was just about to tear up my lottery ticket when I 
noticed how he was walking: a little bit sideways, loping, with a 
skip every now and then. When his face came into view from 
under his hat my hopes were again renewed. He was obviously 
retarded.  So I stuck my lottery ticket on the refrigerator in my mind 
with a magnet shaped like a slice of watermelon. 
	Tawny opened her door and I gently grabbed her arm. "Wait 
a second, who lives here with you?" I asked. "I can't just drop you 
off without making sure you'll be all right."
	She studied me a second then said, "Jus me, Gramma, 
Papa, and Joe." She indicated the big guy coming up to her door.
	"Where's your mom and dad?" I asked, letting her go.
	"Don't got no pa, an my ma's in prison - for a long time."  She 
said sadly.
	I banged my head on the steering wheel, trying to figure this 
puzzle out.   I was trapped for the moment, because I could not 
leave a young girl here alone with a senile old woman and a 
mentally retarded...  giant.  But at least that takes the decision 
away from me. I got out and steadied the old lady as we followed 
Tawny and Joe into the trailer. 
	The window AC sounded like it was about to throw a bearing, 
but the trailer was cool inside. I glanced out the window into the old 
cabin. There were chickens scratching around a huge pile of 
trash, mostly beer cans and milk jugs, apparently thrown from the 
very window I was looking through. 
	I sat down at the kitchen table. It was piled high with old 
newspapers, magazines, and an ashtray full of cigar butts. Joe 
was eyeing me from across the room, and every time I met his 
eyes, he would tug at his shirt. 
	Other than the smell of stale cigar smoke, the trailer smelled 
clean and was surprisingly well ordered in contrast to the outward 
appearance when I first drove up. Tawny sat sideways in the chair 
across from me and was examining her elbow, her shoulder blade 
contorting as if disjointed as she strained to see whatever it was 
that was bothering her.  
	Joe stood in the doorway to the sitting room and stared off at 
a point in space somewhere between Tawny and I.  I became 
curious what he was thinking about because it seemed obvious he 
was dreaming about something. Suddenly he snapped out of his 
trance and fixed me with a stern look. Again he pinched at the 
fabric of his tank top t-shirt and tugged on it. 
	"Why does he keep doing that?" I asked. 
	Tawny turned to look, "Doing what?   What are you doing 
Joe?"
	Again he tugged at his shirt and Tawny immediately turned to 
me and said, "Oh, he always does that. He wants you to take your 
shirt off. He's retarded."
	Joe smiled a little wider and glared at me. "Take shirt off." He 
said in a deep, thick tongued voice.
	The old lady, who had retreated to the back as soon as we 
came in, was coming back down the hall toward the kitchen. 
Coming up behind Joe she thumped him in the back of the head 
with her fingers, squeezed past him, put a teapot on the stove, 
turned a burner on, turned around, bopped Tawny on the head, 
who ignored her, took a step toward me, stopped, raised her 
hand...  I raised my fist and pointed it at her, she thought better of it, 
and left.
   	Tawny laughed a loud belly laugh at me, apparently confident 
I would never have struck the old lady. She got up, took the teapot 
off the stove, filled it with water, placed it on a different burner, and 
sat back down.  This girl was no dummy. 
	"Why would he want me to take my shirt off?" I asked. 
	"Jus don't pay no mind. He does it to everyone." 
	"Yeah, but why?" I insisted. "Don't you know why?" 
	"Shore I do, cause he's retarded, like I told you." She said. 
	Apparently Joe knew we were talking about him because he 
persisted, "Shirt off." he said thickly, and then, "Medicine". And 
moved close to where I was sitting.
	Tawny was now picking at a toe, uninterested. 
	"Medicine?" I asked, to no-one in particular. 
	Tawny, now getting frustrated that we were not going to let it 
drop, got up and shoved Joe with all of her weight. Joe was 
knocked back a fraction of a step. Pushing again he stepped back 
voluntarily, "Leave him alone Joe, or I'll..." She sat back down and 
continued picking her toes.  
	"Oh, it's all right. I don't mind." I said.     She fixed me with a 
look that said 'you don't know what your talking about.' 
	Tawny must have been about 11 or 12 years old. I had been 
admiring her, trying to understand her growing attractiveness. 
Upon close examination, one might lean towards the notion that 
she is a child's child, replete with dirty bitten fingernails, unkempt 
frizzled hair, a taught wiry body, and a temperament of quiet 
contemplation highlighted with explosive bursts of movement and 
voice often leaning towards violence. However, adapting a wider 
perspective through which to view her, I became aware of certain 
qualities that suggest an elegance, a sensuality, and a deeper 
maturity than one could credit to a child. These qualities become 
apparent when her passionate mind calms down and her body 
settles to resting state, striking a pose certainly choreographed by 
someone, perhaps the Creator Himself, in order to highlight the 
soft curves of her otherwise thin limbs, the evening light enhancing 
the affect: a pose that by habit or choice, almost always stretched 
out, reclined, exposing how the separate elements of her form 
were carefully sculpted, blended in with the rest to form a most 
desirable package. Her face, careworn while at rest, with a slightly 
furrowed brow concentrating absently on whatever her hands had 
chosen to pick on at any given time, would change most 
remarkably at the realization of being watched, the smile and 
sideways pull of her eyes as they slowly went back to what they 
were doing, suggested a flirtatiousness bordering on the erotic. 
	She wore a tank top that was way too big for her, and as she 
was leaning over picking at her toe, I was soaking in the sight of 
her small breast clearly visible as the shirt sagged forward. Most 
pubescent girls' breasts have tiny, pointed, pale nipples. Tawny's 
were a deeper color than usual and much larger. They were 
puffed all around the areoles, and at least half of her total breast 
size was nipple, even though the entire breast was little more than 
a plum. I imagined they must be incredibly sensitive to touch.  She 
also had reddish blond hair and blue eyes. She was slight in build 
and probably only weighed 80 pounds or so . 
	Her attitude, basically uninterested in me, was diminishing my 
hopes of winning my secret lottery.   I stood up.  "Maybe I should 
get going.  You look like you'll be all right until your grandpa gets 
home. You got a phone? So you can get help if you need it?"
	Tawny, blocking the way to the door said, "No, don't go!"  
Turning to Joe she yelled, "You see, Joe? You scared him away!" 
Turning back to me she said "Caint you stay for a little while 
longer? I promise Joe won't bother you no more. Will you Joe?" 
	"Medicine" Joe answered.
	"Now jus hush that up." She side-stepped me and slapped 
Joe's arm, then sprang back to defend the door. 
	"Really, I don't mind. Can't you tell me what he means? I'm 
just curious. Does he take pills because he's retarded?" I asked.
	"No, nothing like that. He's got medicine inside. The doctor 
puts it there. He jus wants to show you. He loves showing off his 
medicine."  
	"Inside where?" I asked.
	"Inside a his body. It comes outta his pecker."  She said, not 
even blinking.
	"Oh, okay, I see." Although I wasn't sure I did. "Who told you it 
was medicine?"
	"Papa. He don't like him showing people cause you caint put 
it back an it's 'spensive."
	It took a lot of willpower not to give any sign of how all this 
new information was affecting me.  My mind was suddenly 
spinning with questions, what to say?, what to do?  Was she toying 
with me? After all, she's no dummy. Or is she really that ignorant? 
	We slowly sat back down.  "Why does he want me to take my 
shirt off?" 
	"That's jus what'cha have to do. He can't get the medicine if'n 
ya don't."
	"Do you think it's really medicine? I never heard of a doctor 
putting..."  I trailed off.
	Tawny slowly nodded emphatically. "I think it's so's to make 
him sleepy. He always takes a nap after, if I let him." She said. 
	"You've seen his medicine?" I asked, hopefully. 
	"Sure, lots'a times. You wanna see?", her mood shifted and 
she was suddenly excited. 
	"No, no, that's okay, maybe later." I said, panicking . 
	Joe moved to the sitting room and turned on the small TV to a 
snowy cartoon. "medicine" he mumbled, as the teapot began to 
whistle. 
	In tottered Gamma. She slapped Joe on the side of the head 
as she passed. Joe, shocked, looked as if it actually hurt him.  
Tawny got up quickly and grabbed the teapot before she could 
totter up. Not finding the teapot on the stove, Gamma turned and 
stared at the TV with Joe. 
	"Does she know what's happened to your papa?" I asked 
Tawny.
	"No.  She don't even know my name no more. Only names 
she members is Vern an Joe. She calls everybody Vern or Joe."  
She said, fussing with the teacups and teabags.
	"What about papa, is he senile too?"
	"God no, he 'members everything. But he's lazy, no count, no 
more' n jus bosses me an Joe all the time, but Joe does most of 
the work cause he's a good mindin' boy if'n ya treats him good. 
Papa don't treats him right an Joe'll jus sit an watch toonies all day, 
less'n I talk at him, then he gets a movin real good."   She leaned 
over to whisper in my ear, "The secret is the medicine. If'n you jus 
tell him you wanna see his medicine after all the chores is done, 
then he goes crazy a workin' at whatever ya say, all day long. But 
if'n you don't makes him wait, then he does it an falls asleep. Then 
ya gotta start all over...   That minds me a sumpin:  Joe!, you done 
them chores I told you bout this mornin?" 
	Joe's eyes rolled up, checking his list of things to do in his 
head, came up empty, and gave her a blank stare.
	"Chickens? Eggs? Fold them clothes on the line? Wash 
yersef up?,  any a those?"
	Joe shook his head. 
	"Well, come on then, get to it, aint a gonna be much time fore 
it bees dark out there." She said, then added, "An after you all 
done you can show Bob an me some medicine." 
	Joe's face brightened immediately and he rushed outside, 
rushed back in, grabbed a laundry basket, and rushed back out. 
	"Ya see?" Tawny beamed.
	"How old is Joe?" I asked.
	"I think he's about 21. My momma an Joe is brother'n sister, 
an he's younger'n my momma. She's 25." 
	"25? how old are you?"
	"11, but I'm almost 12"
	"She had you when she was 14 years old?  Wow,"  I said in 
an voice much more amazed than I actually was. 
	"Yep." she nodded. "I woulda had a big brother but he's still 
bornt when my momma was twelve.  You want some tea?" 
	"Yes, please. That would be nice."
	"You shore are a polite sort. We don't go in for polite talkin' 
much round here. Mostly caus'a mean ole Vernard Buskins." 
She yelled toward the back of the trailer, and from back there the 
reply came, "Vernard?"   Tawny turned back to me, "But I like's it 
when you talk nice. Makes me feel like a princess or sumpin." She 
set the tea cup on the table, placed the teabag in, and poured the 
boiling water with great delicacy and skill. "That minds me. I better 
get mysef cleaned up afore Joe come's in. He's a hog for hot 
water."  And with that, Tawny disappeared into the back, leaving 
me to ponder my lottery odds. They kept changing on me. 
	I changed seats so that I was facing down the hall, in hopes 
of catching a glimpse of Tawny in some state of undress. She 
emerged from one of the rooms in a tattered knee length robe, 
holding it closed in front with one hand and carrying her dirty 
clothes in the other. Tossing them on the washer, she let go of her 
robe and dug among the clean clothes on the shelf and selected a 
few items. As she turned and stepped into the bathroom, her robe 
flowed open gracefully, exposing one long thin leg and a bare hip. 
Just before her head disappeared, she glanced toward the 
kitchen, connecting with my eyes for an instant. I could have sworn 
there was some kind of communication in that look, or maybe 
intent, the hint of a wry smile accompanied with the open robe. But 
now she was gone. A moment later I heard the shower come on. 
	There could be no doubt: I was very attracted to this girl. A 
strange type of mischievous attraction that had a lot to do with her 
vulnerability and my current anonymity. I couldn't explain it, but I felt 
it. The feeling was strange but very exciting. It reminded me closely 
of when I was a kid about Tawny's age, camping with my friends in 
the back yard, and we would go to girls houses and help them 
sneak out. Then we would sit on the 9th green of the golf course 
and play strip poker or truth or dare, or whatever - running around 
naked and free. Being here made me feel young again. 
	Joe came in with the laundry basket full of neatly folded 
clothes. "Shirt off, medicine." he said as if he had been mumbling it 
over and over during his chores.  After he put the clothes on the 
shelf, he impatiently hung at the bathroom door. 
	Tawny emerged in a clean tank top and panties, shoved Joe 
out of her way, and put her robe back in her room before returning 
to the kitchen. 
	As if in slow motion, and in a surreal dream, I saw Tawny 
walking towards me down the hall, the sweet lines of her body 
silhouetted from behind by the setting sun beaming in somewhere 
behind her, the skin tight tank and panties gave perfect outlines to 
her form, and what appeared to be a shimmering aura that shone 
from the edges of her silhouette, I found was nothing more than 
the reflected sunlight playing off the soft blonde fuzz that covered 
her body. Is she completely immodest? Or had she calculated what 
the two ounces of clothing and dusk lighting would do to me?
	"Joe, you wash up real good. Mr. Bob and me don't want no 
stinky sweaty boy showin his medicine." She yelled at the door as 
she passed, in a somewhat loving, maybe motherly way.
 	"Shirt off, medicine".  I heard from the bathroom. 
	Tawny added, "You done real good folding the laundry Joe, it 
looks real nice."   Then sitting down across from me,  "You see? 
He's a good boy. Works real hard. And he ain't like most of them 
retards that caint do nothing right. He's real good at things long as 
you get him started off doing them. Elsin he just sit there watchin 
toonies. I figured him out though. Just be nice and let him show his 
medicine. Iffin you don't, he gets real stubborn like an ole sore 
footed mule." She paused, reflecting...  "If I dint have Joe, this 
place'd make me crazy. I'd a done kilt myself a long time ago." She 
said seriously, absently staring out the window. 
	"Now, you're just saying that. You're a great kid Tawny, I think 
you are a lot stronger than that. Killing yourself is a cowards way 
out of trouble, and I know for sure you aren't a coward."
	Tawny's eyes sparkled and brightened with the compliments. 
I was dead honest in giving them, and she could tell. This 
recognition of her strength of spirit is something she had been 
sorely missing, and now she could see her lottery odds getting a 
whole lot better, as could I.  But upon reflection of the compliments, 
a scowl crossed her face and she exclaimed: "Hey, I ain't no kid no 
more." She said defiantly. Then to prove it, she stuck her chest out 
and pulled down on her tank top so that it stretched across her 
chest, highlighting the breasts she was growing in her garden. 
"See?". 
	"Oh yes, I see all right, You are definitely becoming a woman. 
I didn't mean to imply that you are childish. You are certainly very 
mature. But you are still very young. So how about we say you are 
a beautiful young lady, rather than a kid. Is that better?" I offered. 
	"Young lady?   Yea, I like that."  She craned her neck around,  
"Did you hear that Joe?" Tawny shouted in his direction, "I'm a 
young lady!"    and the shower came on a few seconds later.
	I reached across the table and took Tawny's hand in mine.  I 
was still under the spell of her dreamy walk down the hallway. 
"Tawny, sweetheart, I'm afraid you are stomping all over my 
already broken heart." She looked at me doubtfully. "I'm lonely. And 
I wish I had a nice girl like you to keep me happy. Because you 
would make me happy. Sitting here with you now I realize I've not 
been made to feel this good in a very, very long time. It's like I've 
known you all my life already. And I'm sad thinking that I'm going to 
have to leave you here. I live far away and have a job and 
everything. I'd never forgive myself knowing I left you here with 
mean ole Vern and no friends but Joe."  I choked back the 
emotions that welled up as I spoke. I knew I was playing at the 
game of trying to get what I wanted so very badly, but the tears that 
pooled in my eyes were as real as the desires that led me there. I 
wondered deeply how I could be so affected in the few short hours 
I had known her.
	Seeing this, Tawny said: "Oh now Mr. Rob, you ain't gotta go 
worrying about all that jus yet. It ain't even happened. We're gonna 
have a nice supper and you can stay as long as you want, long as 
Vern ain't here, cause I'm boss when he ain't here." 
	I smiled affectionately toward her, then leaned over and 
kissed her forehead cupping her cheek in my hand. "Okay, you're 
right. But If I can't call you a kid, you can't call me Mr. Bob.  Right 
now I feel a whole lot younger than I am, so don't go making me 
feel old. Okay?"  I asked, still a little choked up, and my eyes 
burning. 
	Tawny's face lengthened as she focused on something rising 
up inside her - she sat stunned. Those last words, even though 
they entered her mind, lay there unattended. I was not aware of 
anything I could have done, but apparently the combination of my 
earlier heart felt words about her strength of spirit, and now having 
taken her hand in mine, my soft adoring words, the cupping of her 
cheek, the kiss on her forehead, and especially the tears I was 
shedding in her honor, added up to the sum total of genuine 
affection she had received since she was little more than a toddler. 
Her instinctive ability to read body language told her that this was 
the real thing. To her, these simple gestures of kindness were 
intensely meaningful. It was something she craved, and as if I had 
pricked the edge of a water balloon, all of her pent up sadness 
and loneliness due to neglect gushed forth. Against her iron clad 
will, tears were quickly dripping from her chin, and another 
heartbeat had her sobbing and coughing, her eyes glaring at me in 
disbelief. She didn't know what had possessed her all of a sudden, 
and it scared her. She was not used to losing control of herself. 
	Having been all but abandoned by her mother, and feeling 
unloved and on the edge of her sanity at most times with these 
remnants of her family, something primal within her, an ancient 
survival program designed to make her appealing to a good strong 
man, instilling a desperate need to please him, to be utterly 
subservient to him in order to receive protection and caring from 
him, anything to rescue her from her plight, had seized hold of her. 
Certain of her gestures and emotional expressions were now 
beyond her control or understanding. And my own ancient 
programs, the ones that compliment her own, to take advantage of 
the affections and services of a young and capable girl that needs 
protecting, rose up to meet her and her tears like venom from a 
viper reached out to me and penetrated my soul, locking us 
together emotionally. 
	I was tempted to get up and go over to her, taking her in my 
arms to console her. But I thought better of it. I sat and held her 
hand, softly caressing the back of it with my thumb while she 
mopped herself with paper towels. It took quite a while for the 
convulsions to subside. Twice it seemed the episode had passed 
only to find it flooding back with more force than before. I think the 
caressing of her hand was perpetuating the moment. I can only 
imagine what holding her in my arms would have conjured. 
	At length, we sat staring at each other, wondering if it was 
over. I had collected a puddle of tears of my own on the table 
under my chin. 
	As if my hand was guided by some outside influence, 
perhaps that clever instinct, or maybe my fatherly instinct having 
done the same thing to my boys at times, and having no way to 
know the catalytic affect it was going to have, my hand reached out 
and pinched a column of snot that hung from her nose. I drew my 
hand back while reaching for the roll of paper towels. Unknown to 
me, the small amount of snot I had grabbed was attached to a 
whole lot more up inside her sinuses.  When I looked back, a rope 
of snot was stretched across the space between us and when she 
sneezed suddenly from the tickling it caused being drawn forth in 
such a way, it released from her nose and impaled me across the 
chest. 
	Needless to say this caused an equally loud and lengthy 
episode of convulsions from both of us, laughing harder than I had 
ever laughed in my life. Three and four times the roar had 
diminished only to renew again in full fury, until our sides ached. 
The final peak of laughter was highlighted with the sudden 
appearance of granny slapping me in the head and quickly 
retreating.   A few minutes after that we fell silent, our ears red and 
our throats raw. 
	Once she was certain she had regained control of herself 
she said, "How about Robbie?"
	"Robbie?" I asked.
	"How bout I call you Robbie so's you don't feel old." She said, 
reminding me.
	"Oh, yeah, Robbie. I like that."  I said honestly. She was 
pushing every button I had in the feel good department.  We sat 
and talked a while about Vern trying to home school both her and 
Joe. We talked about my life some: my job and my apartment. She 
was very surprised to learn I had two boys older than she was.
  	About that time Joe came bustling out of the bathroom, 
naked, searching for clean clothes. A prominent blue scar was on 
his back. Tawny looked over her shoulder at him until he 
disappeared, and then turned back to me with a noticeable blush 
on her cheeks. 
 	"You remember you said you liked being talked to politely? 
That it makes you feel important, like a princess?" I asked. Tawny 
nodded, "Well, you are a princess. I think you're very pretty and 
smart, and you take care of people. Very admirable qualities for a 
person in such hard circumstances."
	"What a you mean hard circumstance?" She asked
	"Well, I mean you live out here with no friends, you don't go to 
school with other boys and girls, you got a mean ole grandpa, a 
senile old grandmother, and a retarded...  Um, uncle?" 
	"Shucks, I don mind. Joe an me is good company to each 
other. An we got's a few friends we go see off'n through the 
woods a piece.  Course ole Vern don know that. He'd be mighty 
fiery mad he knew we gone off." She said.
	"What kind of friends are they?" I asked.
	Tawny looked at me a little queer.  "What do you mean what 
kind o friends? The friendly kind o'course."
	"No, I mean are they boys and girls your own age? Do they 
live nearby? Do they ever come see you?" 
	"They know better'n come pokin round here. They's mostly a 
pack o girls goes to the big school. They's not real nice to...  well, 
come to think of it, they ain't acted very friendly. They's nice an all 
till they see Joe's medicine, then they turn mean and don't want to 
play no more."   She said, her spirits sagging.  "but I figured em 
out, kinda like I did Joe. You gotta make em wait. Caus'n Joe ain't 
gonna do nothin less'n I says he can. So I make em treat me nice 
and we play some fun games afore I let em have what they came 
for. Now they's havin almost as much fun with me as they do 
watchin Joe."
	"Who takes off their shirt for him, you or your friends?" I 
asked.
	"They do o'course. They's the ones getting the show. I makes 
em all show their boobies to Joe. He likes it alot an always begging 
to go see the 'wood girls'  Those girls are alot like Joe. They do 
anything I says jus to get to see him.  He is a pretty thang for a 
retard."
	My wonder at this girl was growing. I was indulging at length 
in the vision of this group of girls in my head and I was getting 
envious of Joe.   
	Tawny was studying me,  "What you thinking? You're studyin 
hard on somethin." She said.
	"Oh nothin.  I was just thinkin I don't blame Joe a bit for likin to 
see those girls. I would sure like to see em too. But I ain't retarded 
an I think they'd be afraid of me. Ya know?
	"I ain't  fraid a you.  An I speck you like lookin at girls, like Joe. 
That's as it should be, huh?."
	"You are something."  I said, laughing.
	Tawny smiled a warm smile, looking me directly in the eyes. 
She was a strong and determined spirit. She seemed to have a 
deep and mature knowlege of people, and yet at the same time 
she seemed naive and innocent. And as these thoughts were 
running through my mind, holding her gaze, it seemed she sensed 
me, and something of my intentions toward her, because her look 
changed to slightly suspicious, but then softened quickly, covering 
herself. In that instant it seemed her guard went down. I felt 
something of her strong desire, her need for intellectual 
companionship and emotional connections, and love.  It seemed to 
me that she was playing in her own personal lottery - hoping 
beyond hope that a particular someone would fall from the sky and 
fill all of her hearts desires. If so, we were on each other's radar 
screens. She had learned from Joe and the girls on the other side 
of the woods that people manipulate each other to get what they 
need, and that being treated nice usually means you have 
something they want. So Tawny wasn't fooled by me. 

	In came Joe, as white as Mr. Clean on a sunny day. White 
overalls and a white tank top. Looking at him, I realized that Tawny 
must have been wearing one of his tanks that fit her so loosely. Of 
course now they each were wearing ones that fit tight, highlighting 
their best attributes: Tawny's perfect plum breasts, and Joe's 
impressive array of toned and sculptured muscles.  Immediately he 
started tugging at his shirt, "Shirt off, medicine" he said, looking at 
Tawny.
	"Get Robbie to ya big oaf, you gonna make me show my 
boobies to our guest?" 
 She said, slightly embarrassed. 
	Joe turned to me, and before he could restate his request, I 
shook my head no and pointed at Tawny. He immediately turned 
back to her and re-stated his due with a stamp of his foot. Her 
modest shirt was ideal for the hot weather, but I couldn't keep 
myself from glancing at her chest, the darkened shade of her 
broad nipples clearly visible in the stretched, sheer fabric.
	"Did you brush your teeth? I didn't hear you brushin your 
teeth." She said sternly. 
	Joe displayed his teeth for her.
	"Come here an let me smell your breath." she said. 
	Now, with a disappointed rather than a demanding stomp, he 
wheeled around and went to brush his teeth. 
	Tawny pulled her legs up in front of her and chuckled quietly 
to herself as Joe stomped off.  She scrunched herself up excitedly, 
bright eyes darting around, apparently enjoying herself immensely. 
	"What's so funny?" I asked.
	"Oh nuthin, I just like teasin him. He gets so excited when its 
almost time. Its just fun." Then she leaned over the table to whisper 
so Joe couldn't hear, "You ain't really gonna make me do it are ya?  
	"Oh yes I am, " I said, smiling wide at her, "I wouldn't miss it."
	"But you're a boy, caint ya just do it so's I don haf to?" She 
pleaded, still blushing.
	I shook my head. "It's only proper that a boy looks at a girl, 
uhm, as it should be, were your words. I would feel very strange 
with Joe looking at me.   Besides, I really do want to see you. you 
are very pretty."  I said as Joe emerged and quickly came up 
beside Tawny, showing his gleaming teeth. 
	With a deep sigh of defeat, Tawny glanced at me - I smiled at 
her - she blushed deeper, and slipped the straps of her tank top 
off of her shoulders, pulling it down around her waist.  It was a very 
beautiful thing to see. And as if she was in the practice of pleasing 
a man with her body, she leaned back and displayed them proudly. 
Both Joe and I were transfixed on her chest. 
	After a few moments of gawking, Tawny touched my arm, 
snapping me out of my trance and pointed toward Joe's crotch. A 
huge bulge had formed. Tawny became impatient, "Well? C'mon!  
We aint got all day ya big dork."
	She leaned back again and I watched her closely as she 
watched Joe unhook the bib of his overalls, unbutton the hips, and 
pull his briefs down.  If she knew what I saw in her reaction to this 
she would have been very embarrassed. It was very obvious that 
Tawny was getting at least as much pleasure from this as Joe was: 
her dumb look, lips pouted out, and unblinking stare, no movement 
at all, until she glanced at me. Realizing that I was evaluating her, 
she smiled knowingly and went right back to gawking. I was 
wrong. She was not embarrassed. 
	Joe had an incredibly handsome erection. If any male erotic 
magazine had known, they would have paid a lot for the privilege. 
About eight inches and perfectly straight, pointing skyward. He 
turned to the sink and started fussing around. I looked at Tawny 
confused.  
	"He's gonna wash it. That makes the medicine come out." 
She said 
	"Oh, I see... "  and then  "You are so beautiful"
	Tawny smiled and gave me a tilted flirtatious look. I don't think 
she could have learned how to give that look in her environment, It 
must be an instinctive signal that girl's just know how to do. In any 
case, getting that familiar look, combined with her toplessness, it 
was almost impossible not to take her right then and there.  
	When Joe turned back, he was stroking himself with a soapy 
washcloth. Periodically he would remove it and stroke the head 
with his other hand.   It was amazing to watch him, but I was more 
amazed watching Tawny, staring at him, so much written across 
her face, so much in the deep blush that ran right down her neck 
and chest, and her nipples that had swelled noticeably and 
reddened in color. She sat perfectly still except for a few 
reassuring glances at me watching her. 
	Joe was working hard, and it didn't take long before he 
ejaculated, catching it all in the washcloth and proudly displaying it 
for Tawny and I. "Medicine."  He said
	"Medicine" I confirmed, both of them smiling at me, proud of 
their accomplishment, proving themselves against my 
doubtfulness. 
	Tawny felt a twinge of something unpleasant. My attention 
had been drawn away from her and towards Joe, and now it was 
likely that her opportunity for more was gone as well now that the 
medicine show was over.  Again her instinctive desire to gain my 
approval, draw my attention towards her, welled up:  She stuck her 
chest out at me and said, "See?  Still think I'm a kid?" 
	If she only knew what that behavior was doing to me. Maybe 
she did know. Maybe subconsciously, like how she knew the 
classic 'fuck me' look.   I smiled affectionately towards her and 
said. "All I know, young lady, is that I love looking at you, and you 
are like the most beautiful princess I could ever imagine." 
	This got some sweet sparkles from her eyes and a shy 
shrug. The awkward lull in conversation as those words hung had 
frozen us. The awkwardness of her being topless and being 
frozen, unable to move, added to the embarrassment.  We just sat 
there staring at each other feeling out of place until Joe provided a 
moderate distraction: He buttoned himself back up and went to the 
TV. Tawny pulled her tank top back up and poked her arms 
through the loops. 
	"Tawny, do you really think that's medicine?" I asked, trying to 
leave the embarrassment behind.
	"Why Shore, it ain't pee an there ain't no way nobody but a 
doctor with a big needle could get it in there." She said confidently.
	"I'm pretty sure I know what it is. I can explain it to you if you 
want." 
	Tawny leaned forward.
	"It's seeds that make babies." I said, Tawny sat motionless, 
showing no signs at all. Just staring at me blankly.
	"It's called sperm.  You ever hear of that?" I asked
	She shook her head
	"No?  Uhm, you know..., well, take my word for it, it's not 
medicine. Every man has sperm, not just Joe."  I said firmly.
	Tawny wasn't phased, "Nuh-uh."  She said, her elbows on 
the table and her head in her hands. 
	"Yes they do. Hasn't any of your friends in the woods told you 
how babies are made?" I asked, a little frustrated at her lack of 
knowledge. 
	She shook her head. "Why would Vern say that then. It's 
medicine I tell you, and you can't prove it otherwise."
	"Oh yes I can,  I can prove it to you. You want to see? I'll show 
you my sperm."  I said, recalculating my lottery odds to about one in 
ten. That's pretty good considering I started the day with one in ten 
million. 
	Tawny lifted her head from her hands and considered for a 
second before she said, "You mean it? Really? You gonna show 
me your medicine too?   You hear that Joe? Robbie's a gonna 
show us his medicine!"  she said, overjoyed.  Joe was asleep. 
Turning back to me she waited expectantly.
	"It ain't medicine I tell you. You think the doctor got at me 
too?"   In that instant, with her triumphant words still ringing in my 
ears, her eyes glinting  devilishly, I realized I had been had by this 
manipulative little.....    genius. I sat and studied her for a moment, 
realizing we had just seen each other's cards for an instant. 
	I screened my words much more carefully now: "Sure, I'll 
show you, but I need your help just like Joe."  I said
	"Okay." she said simply, starting to pull her arms back out of 
her tank top.
	"Well, not exactly like Joe," I said.  Tawny stopped with her 
elbow up like a chicken wing.  
	"What?"  She asked.
	"Oh, nothing much. Just show me what a pretty young lady 
you are, what a beautiful princess looks like when she takes all of 
her clothes off."  I waited for her reaction.
	She sat looking at me with a poker face, slowly lowering her 
arm and sliding her shoulder strap back in place. I noticed a new 
flush of red on her cheeks, obviously embarrassed at what she 
was imagining. But to my surprise and delight, she screwed up her 
courage and said bravely,  "Is that all? You just wanna see me 
necked?" And as if to prove her courage, and probably to commit 
us both to our promises before we could have second thoughts, 
she jumped up, stood in front of me, lifted her shirt off and stepped 
out of her panties. 
	I gazed at her full frontal nudity - her soft smooth skin and her 
taught mound folded neatly into a small slit. Blonde peach fuzz 
created an aura over her whole body, with the bright sunlight still 
beaming in from the back of the trailer somewhere. Reaching out 
my hand, she took it and I pulled her closer to me. Standing 
between my knees, I began to run my hands gently over the curves 
of her young body. 
	Tawny tensed at my touch and stepped back, out of my 
reach. 
	"What's wrong sweatheart?" I asked.
	"Nothin, I guess," tentatively taking a half step forward, 
digging for more courage. "I just, I mean I likes it, but Joe don't 
never like touchin, so I thought..." 
	I reached for her again and she stepped up more eagerly.  
As I very gently and reasuringly caressed her, I said "Joe's 
retarded. I'll teach you about things the way they really are. And I 
won't do anything to hurt you.  Okay?"  I said, pulling her in and 
hugging her tight. 
	When she stepped back from the hug, I was very happy to 
see her smiling warmly and urging me on with every inch of body 
language she could find.    I turned her away from me and stood 
behind her, caressing her shoulders, arms, hips, thighs, and then 
her breasts. Cupping them with both hands, I kissed her shoulder 
and neck.  Hearing a sound, we both turned to see her 
grandmother tottering towards us down the hall.  I froze and Tawny 
made no sign at all. 
	Slapping Joe's head as he slept in the recliner, she walked 
on toward us, "Vern, It's suppertime, Vern." she said and tottered 
right past us to the refrigerator. Tawny looked up at me and smiled, 
unconcerned. With my erection raging against my jeans, Tawny 
sweetly removed my hands from her breasts and went to help her 
grandma. 
	Sitting back down I watched her nymph like form move about 
heating some soup, and guiding her grandmother back to her 
room, reassuring her that supper was coming, and getting a slap 
on the head for it. 
	As soon as she returned, she sidled up close and placed my 
hands back on her breasts. 
	"Do you like to kiss?" I asked, staring disbelievingly at my own 
hands as they massaged the objects of thousands of my fantasies. 
	She shrugged down at me. "I don't know." she said honestly.
	Sitting her on my knee I reclined back with her in the crook of 
my arm. I kissed her while fondling her breasts with my free hand, 
but she held her lips closed tightly. 
	Grudgingly I removed the hand from that heavenly realm and 
took hold of her jaw, "Relax, open your mouth a little and relax" I 
said. 
	She did and I guided her mouth against mine, running my 
tongue across her teeth and tongue.   Unexpectedly, she began 
humming or moaning softly, making me wonder again if she could 
have learned this somehow.  We kissed deeper and deeper as I 
pondered these mysteries, and I twiddled her nipples noting the 
changes in her moans as I did. 
	The soup started to boil.  Reluctantly, Tawny released herself 
from me again and fixed a tray with a bowl of soup, some bread, 
and a glass of milk.  I watched with stunned detachment as she 
carefully carried the tray down the hall, back straight as a pin and 
her head as if balancing a book on it - naked.  
	"Naked" I said out loud to myself.  "I am here with an 11 year 
old girl who is walking around naked."  I affirmed with total 
astonishment. "And she adores me."  I added, and decided it might 
be bad luck to try to figure the lottery odds when things were this 
good. Or maybe the lottery was already won and I just didn't realize 
it yet.
	The door in the back slammed shut and Tawny quickly ran 
back to the kitchen, excitedly forcing herself back into my lap, 
searching for the exact position she had been in, in hopes of 
feeling the exact feeling she had felt. She knew she was on to 
something big and important and intensely satisfying.
	I resumed her education in erotic pleasure seeking, kissing 
her delicately, caressing her nipples endlessly, and becoming 
frustrated at the urgent pain and pressure in, on and around my 
manhood. I had to do something, I had no choice. After a 
significant pause in conversation in which Tawny had slipped ever 
deeper into a state of surrender, and with our lips touching I asked:   
"Do you still want to see the medicine... Err, I mean sperm? " 
	"Uh huh" she uttered dreamily, and nodded slowly, brushing 
her lips across mine. 
	"I really need to show you, even worse than Joe."  
	"Mmm Hmm" she said still swooning as I gathered her up 
and carried her to a small couch opposite Joe's chair. 
	I manipulated her and the cushions gently so that she was 
slouched way down, her neck bent, head against the back of the 
couch.   Standing over her, she watched as I removed my clothes, 
my erection springing out in front of her dancing eyes, and my 
eyes probing her entire body. She was incredibly beautiful and 
willing.  
	Kneeling, I separated her knees and came up between them. 
I ran my hands all over her body, watching her muscles twitch as I 
rubbed my thumb lightly around her clitoris - and leaning over her 
to suck, for the first time, on her plum nipples. This was almost too 
much for her, they were incredibly sensitive: She gripped my hair 
and pushed me away. But without letting go, she yanked me back 
to her and popped her plum back into my mouth.  I thought maybe 
it was an orgasm, but at the time I wasn't touching her crotch at all. 
	When she released me, I took her hands and wrapped them 
around my penis. Reaching under her hands that were now gently 
stroking me, I rolled my thumb around her clitoris vigorously, 
feeling a considerable amount of wetness, challenging me to 
explore the feeling of pressing my shaft inside her. I knew my 
penis wasn't as big as Joe's, but it was just as pretty, and I 
suspected that a fairly thick 6 1/2 inches would fill that wonderful 
space perfectly.  
	She began to buck against my thumb, and amid squeeks and 
hissing breath through her teeth, she shuddered in the grips of a 
powerful orgasm, while looking me square in the eyes, her hands 
clamped tightly to my penis. 
	She slumped back into a puddle - a relaxed mass. She let 
her hands slip from my erection, leaving herself exposed to me.  I 
could not resist the offering.  
	Gently urging her to raise her hips, I rubbed the head around 
her vagina, smearing the wetness up and down the length of her 
slit, from clitoris to anus. Pressing at her opening, my head slipped 
easily inside of her. I had not planned to, I had intended to just 
masturbate for her, but instead, I found myself answering the urge 
to press deeper - to thrust in and out in ever increasing penetrating 
pushes. I expected her to start wincing in pain, but she did not 
wince in pain. To my astonishment, I was already sliding deeply 
inside her, the feelings of her very tight and slick tunnel sending 
shivers throughout my body, and the sight of my erection 
disappearing completely behind her soft, smooth mound of flesh, 
nearly drove me to madness. 
	Gathering momentum quickly, I was thrusting vigorously and 
deeply. She was swimming in the pure instinct of animal mating, 
without the polluted knowledge of archaic religions and modern 
society. She was rewarded with all of the wonderful emotions, 
sensations, and self-manufactured neural stimulants that are a 
part of our biology and accompany this event. For her, there was 
no guilt, no consequences: She was just doing what she 'felt' like 
doing. And she was in heaven. 
	Holding myself deep inside her, I pulled her from the couch 
and I laid on top of her on the floor. Now, our bodies were pressed 
together for the first time, in full intimate contact, my erection filling 
her up, we were one. We slowed the pace down, revelling in the 
feeling of slow withdrawels and deep plunges, her body constantly 
churning out a wonderful quantity of sweet lubrication. We rolled 
over, exploring new positions, keeping our bodies close. 
	Back where we had started on the floor, Tawny was 
completely enveloped under me, I pounded hard in a furious climb 
to orgasm. Tawny quickly shivered to climax, her muscles tensing 
and toes curled up tight. At the last possible moment I pulled out 
and squirted my sperm all over her chest and stomach. 
	Spent, we lay on our backs side by side on the floor, Joe 
murmuring in his sleep. 
	"That was amazing"  Tawny said.
	"That, my dear young lady, is what life is all about"
	"Am I gonna have a baby?"  She asked
	"No sweetheart. I don't think you are quite old enough yet. 
Besides, I didn't put any sperm inside you." 
	"Yea, I can see that. It's all over me. Why did you do that?" 
	"I don't want you having a baby, and it would make a mess on 
the floor. Besides, it's fun to squirt it on you afterward.  I don't know 
why. Maybe it means I've marked you as my girl."
	Tawny thought about that and decided she liked the idea. 
	"Tawny, have you ever done anything like that before? I 
mean, ever have something up inside you like that before?" I asked 
cautiously.
	She lay there silent for a while, then said, "I caint move with 
this mess on me."
	I got up, rinsed out the washcloth with warm water, and 
gently cleaned her up. 
	"The reason I'm askin is that girls when they do it the first 
time always bleed a little and it hurts some. but you didn't. Do you 
know why?"
	She again went quiet for a long time, lying there naked, still 
flushed with her own chemical cocktails running through her body.  
She turned and fixed me with a fearful gaze. 
	"What is it, honey?"  I asked.  "You can tell me anything, you 
don't have to be afraid."
	"I almost caint remember.  Seems like a long time ago. I 
knowed what happened though, but I don't never talk about it."
	"Well, it might help if you did. but you don't have to if you don't 
want to."
	"It was Joe." She said simply.
	"Joe?" I said surprised. I was expecting Vern or some man in 
the woods.
	"Yep. It was my fault, I was teasin him about his medicine an 
he got powerful mad to me. He jus tore my clothes off and started 
a humpin on me. It hurt I knows but my back was on a rock and 
that was hurting powerful more than what he was a pokin me with.  
But then my momma kicked him off a me and shot him with a deer 
rifle right in the chest.  I thawt he was dead, dead, dead. but he 
wernt. When they heard what she done at the hospital, the sherriff 
come an take her to jail an I ain't never seen her no more.  When 
she done shot him, she was a sceamin she gonna kill any som-
bitch touches her Tawny girl.  An ever since then he don't touch me 
no more. Not even when I passes him the salt."
	I had to clear away the confusion of my own perceptions of 
what is real and what must be fiction before I could allow the 
image of this affair to penetrate the barriers of my consciousness. 
Loose scraps of unanswered reality were snapping into place with 
answers attached to them: The purple scar on Joe's back, the way 
Joe only looks at Tawny's breasts and never touches her when 
he's masturbating, The way Tawny bosses him around and shoves 
on him without the least concern for reprisal. 
	 "How old were you sweetheart?  How long has your momma 
been gone?"
	"Seems a whole lot longer than it prolly is. I kinda lost count 
of days after she's gone. Lord how I cried, an how long it been i 
don know.  I can't remember almost nothin cept what I seen'n 
heard that day."
	"Do you remember how old Joe was? Was he a big guy like 
now?" 
	"Well, kinda, he was tall but kinda skinny. not all like a bull the 
way his is now. Gawd, how he stared at my ma, blood soakin his 
shirt, his little pecker standin up... She was a tryin to figur out how 
to cock the gun again cuas'n she's a gonna kill him. Poor ole Joe.  I 
tried to tell the sherriff how it be with Joe an all, an I told him how it 
was my fault an all, but he shook his head sayin you caint go 
shootin kids cause of a little spring fever, an ole vern told him how 
she was a tryin to reload so's to kill him, an the sherriff, he didn't 
like that one bit.  So she's gone.  My momma."
	She was staring blankly at the ceiling.  From what she said, it 
sounded like Joe was about 14 or 15, his penis not fully mature, 
but still a tall kid. God, that means she was about 6 or so. 
	"Stay quiet there for a minute." I said, getting up.   Even lying 
there naked in the dim light, I was seeing her completely different 
now. My sexual needs being overly satisfied, I was now deeply 
concerned and feeling very protective of Tawny, and I was 
wondering now that if I hadn't been such a determined pervert, I 
might have had the capacity to help her. As it was, I had to hope no 
one would see me leaving town so that I would pass into the void, 
leaving behind vague recollections of a man in a pickup truck, and 
a very confused and lonely young lady.  
	My sense of paranoia and self preservation was assembling 
the vast quantities of ways I would get caught if I stayed around too 
long. Of course everything hinged on Tawny. If she kept quiet 
about the whole thing, and could show a high level of discretion, 
then there would be nothing to worry about. But my life experience, 
especially when I was her age, made it clear that secrets were 
designed to be told. They itched and squirmed to be told.   But 
upon reflection, I realized that the alternate reality, the one where I 
didn't allow Joe to show his medicine in my presence, thus 
eliminating the subsequent domino affect of sexual events, And in 
the absence of intimate discussions that followed, these extremely 
personal subjects would have been left unexplored. She would 
have been untouched by me, but I would have had nothing to offer 
her other than a meaningless good bye blessing - all of her 
ambiguous problems in tact. 
	I returned to her side with her tank top and panties, and a 
blanket I found folded on the shelf in the hall.  I dressed her, one 
leg, arm, and head at a time - wrapped her in the blanket and 
carried her out to the porch in front of the old cabin where an old 
glider loveseat sat rusting. Cradled in my arms I rocked her while 
the creaking and squeeking from the glider lulled our minds numb. 
She quickly fell asleep in my arms. 
	I sat there, sinking into an ever deepening meditative trance. 
The squeaking of the glider and the aching of my arms as I 
supported the sleeping girl acted as a most effective mantra. 
	Meditation has served me well throughout my life. For many 
years I had dismissed the concepts altogether, not realizing that I 
had already been using them extensively.  Simply put, meditation is 
the pursuit of a state of being where emotional responses in your 
body quiet down so that perception of events and circumstances 
clarify.  You see, emotions are biological. They are the stimuli that 
enact a host of behaviors encoded in our genes. These behaviors 
exist through natural selection for one reason only - to propagate 
the species.  Or more closely defined: They are to help us survive, 
mate, and raise children, which is simply restating the same thing. 
Emotions and instinctive behaviors are for those reasons only, 
nothing else. But along with the resulting programmed behaviors 
come groups of programmed rationalizations and justifications, 
designed to help motivate us to take the suggested action.  This is 
the nature of 'instinctive behavior'.  The most important thing to 
realize when accepting these facts is that the rationales and 
justifications that help prod us along are designed to hide the true 
reasons for the behaviors. And many are out right lies.  For 
example: Sex.  The reason for sexual behavior is for procreation. 
But when we engage in it, it is seldom with the intent of having a 
baby. The thought of having a baby doesn't excite us sexually - 
our instinctive behavior manipulates us into doing it with promises 
of happiness, erotic bliss, rewarding chemical cocktails...  They are 
all carrots to lull us along into doing it, and what gives it away 
entirely is the fact that for the vast majority of early sexual 
encounters, there is never the conscious intention to make a baby.  
It is for pleasure only. We are being lied to! By our own DNA!  
	This is why humans struggle so much in perceiving their 
world. Because they seldom know the true motives behind their 
behavior. We are driven by emotions. We are instinctively given a 
sense that if we feel a certain way, there must be a 'good' reason 
for it, and as such, we don't bother with the why's and where fore's 
very much, at least until modern times where the consequences 
for bashing the skull in of a man sleeping with your wife can be 
disastrous. For the several hundred-thousand years that these 
behaviors were occurring in such frequency to become hard 
coded in our genes, they were good. It kept men very careful about 
who they slept with, and killing a man back then, especially for that 
reason was looked upon admirably by the community, and he now 
possessed the dead man's property, wives and children as a 
bonus.   Everything is backwards today. Modern society and 
religion is at war with our emotional and instinctive selves.   
	Meditation rolls back the fog. It allows a person to reason 
logically like a Vulcan. It cleans our perception of others by 
removing the influence of 'what's in it for me?'.   Meditation works 
by allowing the conscious center of the mind to focus on a menial 
task or distraction that does not have an emotional component. 
Like breathing, humming, chanting, the buzzing of a fly, the 
chirping of frogs, or as in my case, keeping the car between the 
lines on a lonely highway late at night.  I had been meditating for 
years on these long commutes without even knowing it.  I knew 
that I usually solved my most perplexing problems while on the 
road, but it wasn't until I actually took a course in meditation, where 
they described in detail the resulting physical and mental state you 
were seeking, that I realized I was already a grand master. 
	Since then, I have been able to induce a meditative state 
easily. The heat and humidity of this early dark evening had Tawny 
sweating in her deepening sleep. I opened her blanket and let it fall 
away. She cooed at the warm breeze on her damp body and 
curled up tight. I clasped my hands to hold her in and dropped 
back into my meditation, keeping my eyes closed, knowing the 
image of her body would be far too distracting. What entered the 
homogenous white of my consciousness was the idea that Tawny 
might benefit from seeing her mother again. And I could only 
imagine the joy her mother would feel at seeing her baby girl. If the 
circumstances of her incarceration were not too dire:  that she 
could present herself clean, well groomed and otherwise healthy, 
that her daughter would take heart in knowing something of her 
mother and to be held by her again, even if only once. I'm sure she 
had probably tried to get ole Vern to take her to her mommy, 
wherever she was, but I can imagine how that went. The problem 
was how to find out without blowing my anonymity or telling the girl. 
I mean, her mother could be dead for all I or anyone knew. Ideas 
began to emerge against the white canvas of my mind: Go to the 
county seat and look up the records surrounding the case. Having 
the name of her mother, I could locate her within the prison system; 
Hell, I guess they could be state charges, or federal for that matter 
- but probably not; A well placed anonymous inquiry at the sheriff's 
office might uncover a tidbit or two, like her name. 
	I shook Tawny awake. "Sweety, I'm going in town to get some 
things. Is there anything you need? like milk or eggs or anything?"  
	Tawny shook off her slumber and sat up, "You aint gotta go 
now do ya? caint you wait till mornin?"  
	"Tomorrow's Sunday, I'm afraid the stores might all be 
closed." I said - from the hip.
	"There is that." She acknowledged. 
	"I'd ask you to come with me but I expect you have some 
work to do with supper and it getting late."
	"Promise you'sa comin' back?" 
	"I promise"

	Driving the twenty miles or so to reach town, I was on a 
mission in my mind to find a payphone so that I could make a call to 
the Sheriff and ask some questions. But I had to be careful. The 
last thing I wanted was to have the Sheriff alerted to what might be 
going on at the cabin out in the sticks. A visit by him with my truck 
there would be disastrous.  I thought better of it.   The meditative 
trance of the drive helped me considerably: Across the calm 
expanse of water that was my consciousness, I could see a 
hospital bed rocking gently on the swells.  Vern!  
	Parking on a dark side street, I approached the medical 
building entrance in a baseball cap and some cheap reading 
glasses I kept in the glove box.  The door was locked but there 
was an intercom.  I pressed the buzzer.
	"Yes?"  came the tinny reply
	"Uhm, yes, I am inquiring about a heart attack patient you 
admitted this morning?"
	"Name?" 
	"Uhm, my name? or the patient's name?" 
	"The patient sir,"  she said, projecting her rolling eyes through 
the tiny speaker.
	"Errr, Vernard Buskins, maam"
	The door buzzed and I entered.  I was led down stairs to a 
room with two rows of beds divided by curtains. Vern was in the 
farthest corner. He appeared asleep.
	The nurse turned to leave, "Uhm, excuse me ma'am, do you 
know how he's doing?" 
	"Not really," she grabbed his chart and flipped some pages, 
"He's being evaluated in the morning by Doctor....   Doctor 
Callahan. He is resident at the university and only comes in when 
there is a cardiac patient.  He's stabilized nicely on blood thinners 
and should be fine until then."
	"Thank you,"  I said to her back.  
	I felt a nagging urgency to get in and out as fast as possible, 
but I didn't know why. It seemed a benign enough situation. None 
the less I prodded Vern and he fixed his beady eyes upon me. 
	"Hello, how are you feeling?"
	"Who the hell are you?" he asked. 
	"I'm the guy who brought you here. You don't remember?"
	"Oh, yea. I remember" he said contemptuously. "You didn't 
have no hat or them girly glasses on."
	'Hmmm' I thought to myself. 'sharp as a tack and mean as an 
angry hornet.'
	'Vernard, you don't mind if I call you Vernard?" I didn't wait for 
an answer. "I'm here because your family is in the care of an 11 
year old girl. Now I know you don't want to rock the boat if you can 
avoid it -  I am here to help but you gotta get rid of that attitude. Are 
we square here? Cause I, being the good Samaritan, won't put up 
with a cantankerous old fart for very long, I'll just call the Sheriff in 
and let them figure out what to do with your wife and Joe, and 
Tawny."
	"How...?  what you been...?"
	"I'm tryin to help you. You understand? Or are you going 
senile on me?"  We glared at each other at length until Vernard 
pressed back onto his pillow, softening his expression and 
searching for some dusty words that might seem friendly.
 	"I'm obliged if'n you's helpin my Flora."  He said.  "I don't 
wanna lose her." 
	I couldn't help notice he didn't mention Joe or Tawny as 
subjects of concern.   "I do want to help. But you have to help me 
find a way.  We gotta find someone to take care of them while you 
laid up here. Is there anyone? Aunt, uncle?"  I paused.  
	Vernard immediately shook his head.  I suspect he burned all 
of those bridges long ago. 
	"Is there anyone who cares about the girl? Did her mom have 
any sisters that would be concerned enough to come look after 
her?"
	"No, Joe's her only kin sides me an Flora."
	"What about her mom. Any chance she might know 
someone? One of her friends maybe?"  I asked, zeroing in.
	"Ain't got no need a mixen her up with it. She done caused it 
all in the first place. Hot as a firecracker, never listenin to nobody 
bout nothin. An' er brat ain't much far from worse."  He stated, 
clamping his jaw shut defiantly.
	"Listen Vernard, I'm gettin a mite sore at you, so you listen 
real close: That girl you don't seem to care for stands a whole lot 
bigger in my eyes than you do, in every way I can think of. And your 
contempt for her when she has to depend on you for everything 
makes me want to wring your scrawny neck. So you got one more 
chance to prove to me that I shouldn't pay the sherriff a visit and 
get em all put into state custody." I said as his eyes widened in fear.  
Not fear of me, but fear of having nobody to go home to. At his 
age, he'd never get them back. 
	In any case, Vernard finally started cooperating and I soon 
had the whole story.   It turns out that Tawny was Vernard and 
Flora's great, great, grand-niece. Her mother, Grace Perkins, had 
inherited the land from her great grandparents, and had, out of the 
kindness of her heart, allowed Vernard and Flora to live with her 
and Tawny, because she needed someone to care for her 
retarded brother and young daughter while she worked in the 
business office of one of the local corporate pig farms.  It seemed 
obvious that Tawny probably had relatives galore, but Vern either 
didn't know about them, or stubbornly would not acknowledge their 
existence. 
	Of course Vernard didn't admit it, but on that fateful day when 
Joe was shot, he seized the opportunity to make sure the charges 
against Tawny's mother stuck. I knew it from how Tawny described 
the events, and I confirmed it with Vernard's overt contempt for the 
woman and her daughter.  
	On the drive back, upon the green fields within my meditating 
mind, came a horseback rider, galloping fast toward me, carrying 
an urgent message and streaming the royal ensign. He heralded 
from the scroll in a clear loud voice: The king has pardoned the 
lady Perkins whom will return to her estate with her honor 
restored.  I queried the messenger for details and all he could say 
was that in exchange for family considerations, her accuser had 
confessed to perjury regarding the case. Having thanked the 
messenger with a gold sovereign, he dashed away, kicking up the 
turf as he went. 

Chapter break


<ringing tone>  
"Greenville Penitentiary, how my I direct your call?"
"Yes, I would like to arrange a visit with one of your inmates. I've 
never done this before, so if you could explain what is involved, I 
would appreciate it."  I said.
	"Are you a relative?"
	"No." 
	"An attorney?"
	"No."
	"If you are not a relative or an attorney, then the visit must be 
initiated by the inmate and approved by staff.  What I suggest is 
you write to the inmate, and if he or she so desires, they can send 
you the appropriate forms." 
	"How long does it take for the staff to approve the visits?"
	"We have a backlog of visit requests of approximately six 
months."
	"Maam, I will be frank with you, I am the temporary guardian 
of the daughter of one of your inmates. I need to discuss urgent 
issues regarding her future health and welfare. She is about to be 
taken from me and placed into the foster care system." 
	"Do you have proof of your guardianship?"
	"No maam, I am only guardian by default of having been the 
one that helped during the crisis. There is no one else at the 
moment."
	"Please hold"
	After a few moments a man came on the line.
	"Security Chf. Thompkins."
	"Yes, Chf. Thompkins,  I am calling..."
	"Yes, I heard, we sometimes monitor calls. I appologize for 
interrupting you, but it sounds as if all you need to do is have a 
phone conversation with the inmate, is that correct?"
	"Well, yes I suppose, but we will be discussing legal matters 
that are privileged, even though I am not an attorney, but if it would 
help to arrange a visit quicker, I would be very appreciative." 
	"We have attorney phones that are not monitored or 
recorded, I can let the inmate use one of those.  Please give me a 
phone number where you can be reached within the next hour or 
so, and the name of the inmate."
	I provided the guy with the info and thanked him profusely.  In 
about 20 minutes my cell phone was ringing with the familiar area 
code and number of the prison.
	"Hello?" I said.
	"Hello,  Who is this?" She asked defensively.
	"Is this Grace Perkins?"  I asked.
	"Yes, who is this?"  she insisted.
	"Are you on an attorney phone?"  
	"Yes, I guess, it says it on the door.  What is going on?  Who 
the fuck is this?" 
	"Grace, you don't know me, but I'm a friend. I have temporary 
custody of your daughter." I spoke as calmly as I could.
	"Tawny?  You have my Tawny?  My baby? Where is she? 
What's happened?"  She quickly became hysterical.  
	"Please, Miss Perkins, please calm down.  Vern Buskins has 
had a heart attack. I helped get him to the hospital and then took 
your girl home.  I am very concerned for her welfare. I am just a 
do-gooder here and I don't intend to abandon my occupation and 
such, but I don't feel right just leaving your darlin girl in the care of 
that man. He don't care a lick for her. She's not attending school 
and she has no friends.  But despite all of that, she is a remarkably 
intelligent, compassionate girl with a strong spirit. She has had to 
be. It seems she is taking care of all of them herself.  "
	"Oh my dear God,  I caint believe...  my baby..."  
	"Have you been in contact with your daughter at all?"
	"No, Shit that bastard, I ain't heard nothin bout her for five 
years, I been so sick with hurt and guilt and I just want to kill that 
son of a.."
	"Excuse me Grace, we might have an opportunity here to 
change things for the better. I have a plan. I think it's going to work, 
but you have to listen real close to what I'm telling you."  I said, 
pausing for her to stop crying into my ear.
	"Vern was evaluated yesterday by a good heart specialist. 
He's probably not going to be around much longer, and that's what 
the doc told him point blank. He started blubbering like a baby.  He 
is so worried about Flora going into a home that he nearly ran out 
of the hospital to try to get to her.  He's smart. He knows what's 
coming and he's desperate to find a way to take care of his wife - 
and to hell with everyone else, including Tawny and Joe."
	"Oh my God, how do you know all of this? How long you 
been taking care of Tawny?"  She asked, now a little suspicious. 
	"A day and a half" I said. 
	"You sure know a lot for a day an a half."
	"Your daughter can fill a head full in one hour"
	Grace laughed at that, then trailed off to crying again.
	"Grace, I reviewed the charges against you. The 
circumstance of you trying to cock the gun again is what really hurt 
you with the court.  I think I can get Vernard to confess that he lied 
about that just to get rid of you for good, and in exchange, you 
would be out on time served and able to take care of his wife for 
him."
	Grace whined a high pitch cry of anguish and hope and 
despair and joy. She recognized it as hopeful, even though she 
didn't understand it all. not yet.
	"Grace, listen, all I need for you to do is maintain that you did 
not intend to shoot Joe a second time. Okay?  It's important. The 
difference in degrees for attempted murder is huge. You will be 
free if the judge buys it.  I gotta go. You stay strong and I'll take 
good care of your girl.
	"Wait, what's your name?"
	But I was conveniently already gone. 

Chapter break


	"Vernard, wake up." I prodded him. 
	"Huh, what?  oh, you again."
	"yes, me again.   Vernard, I got a solution to your problem." I 
said, and waited for his reaction.    He sat up eagerly. Apparently 
that's all he's been dwelling on, with not even a book or TV to take 
his mind off his worries. 
	"Solution? What do you mean?  There ain't no solution. I 
been through it every which way the ass can point. They gonna 
take Flora from me an put'er in one o' them state run homes.  
She'll be dead in a week."  He cried.
	"Listen to me Vern. You might be smart, but there ain't a one 
of us as smart as all of us. I got an idea you haven't thought of.  
You're going to write a letter. I brought it all right here. Here's the 
address, it's a real simple little letter.   I'll talk, you write."
	"To the prosecuting attorney, state of Virginia, Western 
District. 
To whom it may concern, I have been recently informed by my 
doctor that I have a terminal heart condition. As such I am 
attempting to make my peace with the All-Mighty.  I have lied under 
oath and perjured myself in the matter of State vs Perkins of July 
12th, 1998.  I reported to officers at the scene and then under oath 
in State Court that I saw Ms. Perkins try to shoot her brother a 
second time.   Ms. Perkins and I were at odds frequently, and out 
of anger and resentment I fabricated the story in revenge.  I have 
been unhappy in the decision ever since.    

May God forgive me, 
Vernard Buskins
	
	"Sign it Vern." I demanded.
	"What good is this?" 
	"Vern, The lesser charge they were considering for Grace 
only held a maximum sentence of 5 years. She's already served 
that. It was your testimony made em give her 25."  I said.
	"You mean they'd let er go?" 
	"Yes." 
	"Well then she'd come...  wait.  What about Flora. She could 
stick her in a home to spite me, me being in jail and all."
	"Ain't nobody puttin you in jail. They don't want no terminal 
heart patients. You'll go home. As ornery as you are, you'll probably 
outlive your wife yet.    Now listen, when that prosecutor comes 
here talkin to you, you just keep it simple and plain. You made it all 
up, and that's all. But don't let him think you're senile or nothin or 
he'll walk out quick.  Okay?  You'll do fine.   I gotta go now."
	"Wait, wait a second, who are you? I mean, what's your 
name?  I... I want to thank you proper and I cain't if I don't know 
your name." He said earnestly.
	"Oh, Shit, that reminds me. You never saw me. I wasn't here 
tellin you all this. This was all your idea born of guilt. right?"
	"Right" Vern said hesitantly.
	"Good. Maybe I'll see you after the dust settles and we can 
talk then." I said.   Vern smiled.   "Now sign the letter and give it to 
the first nurse you see. 
	

	Chapter break

	"Richmond Herald Newsroom, how can I help you?" 
	"Yes sir, I have an anonymous tip regarding an attempted 
murder case..."
	"Yes, go ahead."
	"There has been a deathbed confession...."
	I outlined the gist in a nutshell and gave enough names and 
dates so they could dig up the rest. I felt it a huge risk considering 
what Tawny and I had been up to, but my anonymity was 
amazingly airtight still. And I was driving the old dodge around 
whenever I could, leaving my truck at Wal-Mart among the throng.  
I felt I needed the story in the papers to move things along a little 
quicker. If a prosecutor can avoid embarrassment by slipping a 
confession into the trash, he will. 
	 I had a long talk with Tawny who cried her eyes out with 
happy tears at the chance her mommy was a comin home at last. I 
was her true knight in shining armor -  What were the chances that 
we had both won each other's lotteries for each other? 
	One of the strangest things I had to tell her, and get it 
absolutely straight in her mind how important it was, that to her, I 
did not exist. I was simply some unknown guy in a pickup that had 
given them a ride home and then disappeared. I did not stay, I did 
not help, I was forgotten.
She didn't like the sound of it, but without really telling her the 
whole reason, I made sure she understood about her mom and 
that she would probably shoot me with a deer rifle if she ever 
found out what we had done together. 	I did tell her it was alright to 
share the fact that I stayed here and that we became good friends, 
and that she needed to change her story about the day Joe got 
shot.  That part she understood just fine.  Her mom would get to 
meet me eventually, if all went as planned.   I told her also that the 
Sherriff would probably come out, and maybe even some 
reporters, so I had to leave that night.  
	A little while later I was checkin under the hood of the Dodge 
and Tawny came up to me with a bag over her shoulder pullin Joe 
behind her . 
	"C'mon Robbie, I gotta goin away present for ya."  She smiled 
mischeivously at me.
	"What? wait, where are we going? "  I asked as we tromped 
off up a trail that looked like it went nowhere.  I was already hot, 
having been messing with Vern's car in the blazing sun. Now I had 
to struggle to keep up with them and the sweat was soaking me in 
the closeness of the woods. 
	"C'mon Tawny, where are you taking me, we been walking 
for ever." I pleaded.  Joe had been mumbling his mantra, making 
me think she had promised him something, but what, I couldn't 
imagine.  She handed me a bottle of water from her bag and said, 
"C'mon, it ain't far now."  She didn't have a bit of sweat showing, 
and neither did Joe.
	Eventually we came to a clearing in the woods. I could hear 
voices and cars and music not too far away as if we were near a 
residential area, Tawny took a pair of binoculars out of her bag 
and handed them to me, smiling very large. 
	"What? What are you cookin Tawny?" I asked.
	"You lay down behind that log there, cover up with some 
sticks and such so if'n somebody over here looks, they won't see 
you. But don't you move you hear. you jus watch what ole Tawny 
can do.  I'll be back in about ten minutes so's you be ready."  She 
trotted off.
	Of course I knew now what was up. She was going to get 
her girlfriends and make them put on a show for me. What a dear. 
And she thought out the logistics perfectly: The binoculars, the 
hiding spot, the water. That girl is a genius." 
	I heard the girl's giggles and short screeches, then shushing 
sounds, then more giggles, etc. as they grew louder and came 
closer. The first to emerge into the clearing as if she were the pied-
piper was of course Tawny, who squinted her eyes right at me to 
assess how well my camouflage was working. She gave me a 
thumbs up from behind her back once she had turned around to 
take charge of the procession. She choreographed the production 
like a pro, directing traffic and trimming up the line. They all obeyed 
stealing shy glances at Joe who was standing slightly apart 
tugging at his shirt and mumbling his mantra, very excited and 
obviously very comfortable among the girls. 
	The girls ranged in age from about 9 all the way to 15 or 16. 
There were seven of them not including Tawny.  The oldest and 
tallest was a strikingly elegant young woman, and the rest, though 
varying greatly in stature and features, all held their own beauty.  
When they had quieted down, Tawny whispered in Joe's ear, who 
shook his head at her. She slapped him hard on the arm and 
whispered in his ear again. This time he stared blankly, 
processing, until slowly he understood and started to nod.  Tawny 
kissed his cheek, turned and took two big steps right toward me, 
peered hard into the shadows one more time to see if I was visible, 
smiled at me, turned and sat down to watch the show. 
	Joe said: "Clothes off - medicine"
	Hearing this Tawny excitedly glanced over her shoulder at 
me, laughing silently, while the girls mumbled among themselves. 
Joe had never changed his mantra before, and this change 
definitely got my attention. A few of the girls removed their tops and 
fumbled with their bras. The others, unsure, waited to hear Joe 
again, "Clothes off - medicine" he repeated in his thick voice. 
	Now some of the girls were topless and stood their waiting 
for the show to start. The others quickly stripped their tops off, 
confident now that that was what he meant.   They stood 
obeidiently with their variety of breast and nipple sizes, skin tones, 
and heights, checking the line to make it straight, and waited.
	"Clothes off - medicine" He repeated. 
	Tawny wiggled excitedly at how well Joe was doing, and the 
girls looked accusingly at her. Tawny shrugged back at them and 
pointed at Joe, "He's the boss, you gotta do what he says or I 
guess we'll just go home."  She said, getting a worried look from 
Joe. She winked at him with no affect.
	"Clothes off - medicine" Joe said.
	Some of the braver girls were too excited to let this spoil the 
fun, so they talked excitedly at the shyer girls while they struggled 
with their pants and stockings, cheering them on.  Pretty soon, 
there was a perfect line of seven dwarf nymphs, naked and 
smiling at Joe expectantly.  I could see the bulge in Joe's overalls 
from my blind, without the binoculars.  In fact, I was close enough 
to enjoy the show without them, But with them, I could easily 
discern the size of each girls clitoris, and the color and density of 
hair, no matter how fine, covering their bodies. One of the girls, 
probably thirteen or so, had an amazing set of breasts. Absolutely 
picture perfect, an artist's dream. 'A camera, a camera, my 
kingdom for a camera!'  Come to think of it, I'm docking Tawny a 
few points for not thinking of it. 
	"Dance - medicine"  Said Joe, the girls moaning loudly at this 
new requirement. 
	"Dance - medicine" he said and stomped a foot to show how 
serious he was.  The lead girls started jitterbugging in place, 
egging on the others.  The excitement and outrageousness of their 
behavior was growing quickly.  Soon the girls were skipping and 
dancing in a big circle around Joe and Tawny, laughing and 
smiling, kicking and spinning, slapping butts in front of them.  
Tawny kept steeling proud glances back at me, but fell still for a 
while as the din continued to rise and the energy started going off 
the scale. All of a sudden she started tugging at her clothes like 
they were of fire. In a flash she was naked and in amongst the girls 
laughing and dancing, staring joyfully at me every time she passed 
by my side of the clearing. 
	Joe was now standing near the ring of dancing girls with his 
pants around his knees, erection protruding out, just staring in 
disbelief at the dancing forest nymphs.  One of the brave girls, 
seeing an opportunity when he wasn't looking, touched his penis 
as she skipped by, Joe slowly reacted, but by the time she came 
around again, his eye had followed another girls bouncing breasts 
away and she touched it again. 
	Soon, all of the girls were touching his penis as they danced 
past, Joe laughing with them. On and on like this, the girls seemed 
tireless, Tawny especially, who I think felt she had been accepted 
by the pack, dancing naked with them, and she too touched Joe 
when she danced by. Even though the girls were still dancing 
energetically, the circle had nearly stopped rotating because the 
girls were taking more and more time to stroke Joe's penis for him 
at each pass, watching the pleasure on his face at each stroke.  
The blushes in the girls were deep and covered their bodies, 
especially when seen in bright sunlight, combined with the sweat, 
humidity and exertion.  
	Joe began to ejaculate and a couple of girls screamed at 
having got some on their hands. They laughed riotously and 
huddled around close to see. 
	The oldest girl, and one of the prime instigators and ring-
leaders, was kneeling down and studying him with a determined 
and serious look on her face. Standing back up she pushed a few 
girls back and came right up close to Joe. She guided his drooping 
member between her legs and rubbed it against herself, throwing 
her head back dramatically as if in the throws of an orgasm 
already - obviously putting on a show for her younger followers, 
who watched with serious faces at the spectacle.  
	Tawny saw Joe's fear as the memory of being shot for 
something similar welled up in him. She went to him and talked in 
his ear, soothing him. He relaxed and looked down at the girl who 
idolized his god-like body.  He was huge next to them.   Her big 
beautiful eyes were looking right into his as she rubbed the head 
of his penis against her clitoris from her tiptoes. Tawny, with a 
brand new education in such matters, took Joe's hands one at a 
time and placed them on the girls breasts.   His eyes grew bigger 
as he began to enjoy the sights and feelings again, his fear 
subsiding. He fondled her breasts eagerly. 
	One of the other older girls pushed the ring-leader away 
insisting on a turn, but she wasn't as tall, and even on her tiptoes, 
she couldn't reach the head of his penis with her clitoris.  So the 
girl went to Tawny and whispered excitedly in her ear, gesturing 
with her hands.  Tawny, stealing a quick glance at me flashed her 
tongue in a bratty way for my benefit, went to Joe and whispered in 
his ear again. The second girl in the meantime had collected some 
clothes and was placing them on the ground. Tawny led Joe over 
and he laid down on his back, on the bed of clothes prepared for 
his comfort, his massive chest and erection visible to me above the 
tall grass. 
	The first girl was moving in toward Joe, realizing now what a 
good idea it was, but the second girl was determined to get her 
turn, having figured out a solution to her problem.  The ring-leader 
relented and stood back watching as her friend climbed on top of 
Joe, straddling his huge torso, her knees un-able to touch the 
ground beside him.  She rocked slowly, trying to find some sensual 
pleasure in what was happening but seeming to be very awkward 
in her attempts.  Her hips were not aligned to produce maximum 
contact with her slit. and she was slid too far backward so that 
most of his penis was out in front of her.  She became 
embarrassed and gave up. 
	The first girl was ready and quickly took her place again, 
having seen the trouble her friend had, she was determined not to 
make the same mistakes.  Taking Joe's hands and placing them 
back on her breasts, she sat up high, rocking and rolling her hips 
in a very effective way. Joe's penis could be seen rising up as she 
lifted, until he was fully erect again, The girl ground her slit against 
his penis skillfully, pausing to touch it, it glistened from her juices in 
the sunlight. She felt alone with him, as if he was hers to do with as 
she pleased. She considered a moment, shifted her position 
forward, and began trying to work him inside her.  The other girls 
gathered behind to see.  The tall girl, with her smallish but dark 
nippled breasts still cupped in Joe's hand, could not for all her 
effort get Joe's large penis to penetrate her.  She gave up and 
decided to save face by letting some of the other girls fail as well. 
	Several of them tried, most very half-heartedly, just to say 
they weren't chicken.  Eventually they settled in to a game of hot 
potato, taking turns stroking him exactly five times each, to see 
who's hand it would be in when it finally gushed.  It was the 
youngest girl who got it all over the back of her hand, mainly 
because she counted once for every other stroke, and in order to 
keep the same cadence of count, her hand moved furiously. 
	With that the event was over and the girls slowly sorted out 
the clothes and got dressed. Tawny was talking excitedly with a girl 
her same age. I heard her say 'My mother' above the other chatter. 
The other girl's eyes brightened in joy for Tawny's good fortune. 
Tawny beamed. 
	The ring-leader was holding them back from leaving. When 
she got their attention, she threatened each of them with all kinds 
of unimaginable horrors if any of them should utter a single word 
to anyone about the secret place and the sacred events that take 
place there. 


Follow-up:   Tawny felt she owed so much that she could never 
ever find a way to pay me back.  I tried to explain that the field trip 
she planned for me in the woods was plenty of payback, but she 
wasn't buying it.  Especially since it was only intended to pay me 
back for 'trying' to help. Because at that time, we didn't even know 
if my trying had worked.  So now that we knew it had, well, an even 
bigger favor was owed.    
	It had been a month or so since Grace had come back home. 
And I was in good with her, and I liked the fire of her spirit the way 
it shone like her daughter's. But I was hesitant to get romantically 
involved, even though I knew I could. All of the messages had been 
sent to me leaving the door wide open. I just didn't know. I couldn't 
see into the future far enough to know how Tawny would feel with 
me in bed with her mom, having as strong of feelings as she does 
towards me. But who knows, We'll see with time how things'll 
settle out.  In the meantime, I had the visions of sugar-plum forest 
nymphs dancing in my head day and night. Relentlessly pestering 
me. Even during one of my meditations I relived the entire 
experience from Joe's perspective, seeing that tall thin girl trying 
her best to impale herself upon me, all the while squeezing those 
tight young breasts.  
	Having those thoughts prominent in my mind, and having 
Tawny sitting here next to me dreamin up ways to repay me, I 
offered some input to her already proven idea maker.  But before I 
could, she spouted out another.  
	"How bouts I cleans yer teeth for ya real good like the lady at 
the dentist, every week for the rest o yer life?  How bouts that?" 
She asked in all sincerity.
	"How bout once and we calls it evens?" I said.
	"No, now you aints be'n serious. I wants to!"  She whined. 
	Her countrified drawl I've noticed ebbs and flows with her 
moods. The happier and more excited she is, the thicker it gets. 
The sleepier and more melancholy she gets, the more proper her 
speech becomes, until you might not even think she lived in the 
country.
	"Hey, Tawny."
	"Hmm?" She hummed
	"I was thinking bout them girls an what you did for me. Man 
that was something. You had them girls eating out of your hands. I 
bet they talked about that for a whole week. They probably still 
talking about it."
	Tawny smiled, "I know. The other day I was throwin rocks in 
the crick from up on the bluff back a piece, an one o them girls 
was a poking around hopin to find me an Joe. She was wanting 
some o' his loving in a mighty bad way to be walking all that way by 
herself."
	"Which girl was it?" I asked.
	"That real pretty, tall one, was trying on Joe so hard."
	"What did you do?" 
	"I told her she just gonna have to go on back caus'n Joe is 
sleeping an if Vern catches holt of her she gonna wish she had."
	"Did she leave?"
	"Yeah, but she tried bein all nice and beggin me a while to 
pleas just the three of us go have some fun in the wood. But I 
worry now bout Joe. He's getting where he might hurt one o them 
girls by accident now he ain afraid to touch em no more. You 
know?"
	"How'd you get so smart for an 11 year old?"  I didn't expect 
an answer.  She shrugged and kept pulling hearts of grass and 
sucking them. "I ever tell you how I meditate?"  She shook her 
head.   I told her a quick version of what meditation does and why I 
use it.  "Well, once I get really deep into it, I kind of wake up in 
different places, and I just watch what happens or what comes into 
my mind, and a lot of times I find the answers to my problems 
there, kind of hidden. Like a puzzle.  Anyway, I woke up once in a 
deep forest inside a clearing and it was real peaceful and the sun 
was shining, but then I saw you coming up the trail and I tried to 
call to you but I couldn't. my mouth wouldn't work right, like it was to 
slow for my mind. You came up to me and whispered in my ear to 
lie down and relax, that I was gonna show my medicine. You were 
treating me like Joe. Then you went off and came back with the 
girls, but they were all kinda scared cause I wasn't Joe, but you 
talked to em and said I was just like Joe, I was a retarded friend of 
Joe's.   Anyway, the pretty girl was on me like she was with Joe, 
and she got me inside her because I'm not so big.   Man, when I 
woke up from that I was sure hurtin to see you."   I've noticed when 
I get in long conversations with Tawny, I start adopting her manner 
of speaking. 
	Tawny was thinking hard about my story. Her eyes were 
sharp and sparking with the tides of ideas coming and going.  
"Robbie, that is a perfect idea. You thinking like me now. Not only 
would I be a payin you back with sumpin I knows you gonna love, 
but I'd be foolin those girls, payin them back too.  It'd be fun to tell 
'em you's not really retarded after all, right after they's all done, and 
watch their faces when you say "Thank you ladies.", in your polite 
speakin way."  She said, and reflected on that a moment, "but I 
knows we can't do that."  She paused, evaluating the risks and 
assembling the bits and pieces of the strategy.  "Oh Robbie, let's 
try, you wanna?  We can say Joe's sick but we was watchin his 
retarded friend while his folks is on a trip. I swear, that is the best 
idea I ever did hear." She said excitedly. 
	"And you won't feel mad at me being touched and loved on 
by them?"  I asked carefully
	"Naw, they ain't gonna never mean nothing to you like I do.  
We know everything about each other and they don know nothing 
an they never will. So we kinda get to have whatever they gots to 
give and we takes it cause they's a powerful hungry for what's we 
got. Sides, I wanna see her git you up inside, an then my friend 
might try and I bet she don't do it. But then I'm gonna show them all 
how we did it on that first night, and sees their faces. Wouldn't that 
beat all?"  She jumped up and spun in circles, her arms 
outstreatched, face to the sky.  Then she stopped to kiss me and 
her dizziness tipped her right over onto her back.  I leaned over 
and kissed her laughing mouth, then tickled her until she squirmed 
away, making the most pleasant and joyous squeaking sounds.
	I had been coming to see these folks on the weekends. 
Tawny and I had had that conversation shortly after I had arrived 
late on Friday. Of course I mostly came to see Tawny, but I always 
brought my tools and worked to fix the place up. With Joe as a 
willing helper, we accomplished amazing things in a very short 
amount of time. Pretty soon we had Flora sittin on the freshly 
painted glider in a flower garden. Watching the birds in the bath 
and feedin from the feeder. Old vern was on oxygen and would 
drag his bottle from the trailer to sit next to her.  I talked with Grace 
about her financial situation, which, for lack of cash, she felt was in 
ruins. But I came to realize that she had not taken the time to 
properly set her affairs in order when she came into her 
inheritance. All she had was a letter in her drawer that left a trust to 
her. She looked at the place as a shabby backwater hole in the 
ground. But I wasn't so sure. When I asked her where her 
neighbors property lines were she honestly didn't have any notion 
except that her property went west of the crossroads. We took 
Tawny with us to the County Seat and looked up the land surveys.  
She had to sit down a spell when she realized she owned over 
4000 acres of forest. I told her she could live like a queen just 
selling a little timber now and then and leasing the hunting rights. 
The land was protected from sale by the trust.  There was a 
significant amount of equity in the trust, but it couldn't be touched. It 
was designed to be self-sufficient so that taxes were paid by the 
interest it generated. But otherwise, she was free to use the land 
any way she saw fit. She had a place to live and no one could take 
if from her. 
	"And to think I took that job at the pig farm like it was the best 
thing coulda happened." Grace said. 
	I had inquired at a local sawmill to get an idea what Grace 
could expect from an acre of selectively cut trees, and met a most 
enterprising gentleman. I didn't disclose any names or places, but 
when I said 4000 acres of timber, within the county, I saw him 
connect the dots.   
	He immediately took me into the lunch room and told me the 
idea his father had thirty years prior, because he had approached 
Grace's great grandparents, but they didn't want the land 
disturbed.  His excitement was due to the fact that with the new 
equipment he had just invested in, selective cutting was much 
more feasible and profitable, and made his father's idea 
irresistible. 
	That evening I told Grace what it was.
	"Grace, I inquired with the sawmill and met a man, John 
BonHomme. Apparently his father new your Great Grandparents. 
He wants to renew a business deal they proposed over thirty years 
ago."
	"What?" she asked curiously. 
	"Well, Apparently there is a spring fed creek out in the middle 
of your tract of land. He wants to cut the timber in that valley, build 
a dam, and make a lake. A large lake. Over 200 acres. He says the 
bluffs ringing the valley will make it the most beautiful place you 
could ever imagine. And he says there's a low shelf of bedrock that 
stands about 45 feet off the valley floor, Just above the waterline of 
the finished lake that would be perfect for a large cabin, and it's 
accessible from the ridge if you blast away a few outcroppings, for 
a driveway." 
 	"You mean for us?"  Grace asked in disbelief.
	"Yes, for you. It's your land isn't it?"
	"Yeah, but I caint afford no big new cabin. And lake? How 
much is all that gonna cost?"
	"Here's the deal grace." I handed her a large yellow 
envelope. "It's all there from when they proposed it 30 years ago."   
Grace started opening the seal.
	"I can tell you the major points.  The sawmill cuts the trees 
inside the footprint of the proposed lake. The state conservation 
department with the Corp of Engineers builds you a top notch 
damn and spillway using federal and state money for the creation 
of wetlands, The lumber company builds you a very handsome log 
cabin lodge on the only spot available, that ledge I told you about, 
they put in a road, paved all the way out to the crossroad, and all 
they want for it is the trees.  The trees they cut for the lake pays for 
it all."  I paused while Grace unfolded the artists rendering of an 
elevated view of the lodge.
	"Oh my God,  It is beautiful"  She said in disbelief
	"Yes it is."
	The lodge was a three sided modified A-frame structure with 
more windows than you would ever want in the city. But of course 
out here, only the animals will blush. It was large, with 4 plus 
bedrooms, and very well designed. 
	"I made them agree to install a state-of-the-art geothermal 
heat pump system using the lake as a heat sync, so that there will 
be no need for propane, and a supplemental high-efficiency wood 
burning furnace and hot water system.  I was concerned that utility 
costs for such a large place might over tax your income." 
	"How soon?" She asked excitedly
	"As soon as you call him back"


	Tawny had taken the idea I had handed her like a snowflake, 
and ran with it until it was like a giant snowball eating up the 
countryside. Even though I did flash back to the forest glade during 
one of my meditations, the idea hadn't hatched until I fantasized 
about it later in a waking dream. I had used creative license in 
telling Tawny it had sprung from my meditations, mainly because I 
was being cautious about hurting her feelings in case she might 
feel jealous. This way it seemed like an apparition, and more her 
idea than mine.  Early Saturday morning she shook me awake, 
poured some coffee in me and pulled me out to our special spot on 
the bluff where we do most of our talking and making out. 
	"Why are we here so early?" I asked, pulling her closer and 
running my fingers across her breasts playfully.   
	She slapped my hands away and said, "Now Robbie, stop it! 
You gotta practice actin like Joe iff'n this is gonna work. We gonna 
go tomorrow after all them girls is home from church and you gotta 
be ready." She said seriously.   "This is important to me, so be 
serious." 
	"Okay, okay, I will. But cain't I have a little lovin to get me in the 
mood?"  I begged. 
	"Well, okay, but then we's a getting serious. Promise?"  She 
held her bent pinky out to me.  
	I hooked mine with hers and rolled her on top of me, kissing 
her lips and slipping my hand up her shirt.  She humored me as 
long as she could before her fear and frustration at not knowing 
my acting capabilities forced her to push me away and get down to 
business.  
	As it turned out, I was a natural. I had been around Joe long 
enough as we worked together that I could mimic his mannerisms 
fairly easily. What Tawny was thinking would take a full day of 
rehearsals took twenty minutes.  So finding a comfortable place to 
recline, I soaked in the scenery while Tawny gently gyrated her 
hips, relishing the feeling of pressure and stiffness deep within 
her. We were incredibly happy. 
	The next day I did some leisurely reading and took a late 
morning shower, checking myself for stray hairs and what not that 
might frighten the girls. But I looked damned handsome in the 
mirror.  By the time I was pressed and dressed, Tawny had her 
bag packed, Joe in tow, and was chompin on the bit to get going. 
When we started off across the yard I stopped, 
	"Are we taking Joe with us?" I asked, puzzled.
	Tawny stopped and fixed me with a confused stare. "Well, 
crap a monkey! What am I thinkin'?" She looked at Joe, "He always 
comes with me." She said.  "Joe, you go back on in the house an 
well come get you later. You watch some toonies, okay?"
	"Medicine" he said, stamping his foot. 
	"It's no good, Robbie, he ain't gonna go."  She thought a 
moment, turned and trudged up the trail, "C'mon, I know what we 
can do." 
	She led us to our secret spot not far from the trailhead and 
quickly dropped her bag to the ground. Turning to face Joe she 
lifted her shirt off and placed his hands on her breasts.  After a few 
seconds, she started rubbing him through his pants. Joe's bulge 
quickly grew. Keeping his hands on her breasts, Tawny undid his 
suspenders and hips buttons and pulled everything down until he 
was exposed. She moved quickly, obviously feeling the need to fry 
bigger fish, even though they weren't bigger. She stroked him 
vigorously, his head tilting and arching in pleasure, and squeezing 
Tawny's small breasts in his massive hands. I was right behind 
Tawny and wanted so much to be touching her, I gently rubbed her 
shoulders and kissed her neck. Reaching around I cupped her 
mound in my hand and massaged her firmly, sucking and licking 
her neck and nibbling her ear. She pumped Joe, switching hands 
when they became tired. Joe removed his hands from Tawny and 
stepped back, stroking himself more fully, with his bigger hands. I 
immediately caressed her breasts with my free hand.  Tawny tried 
to open her legs while standing but stepped on my foot, tripping us 
both up. We fell to the ground. By the time we had gotten back up, 
Joe was dripping the last of his medicine onto the ground in front 
of him. Quickly, Tawny put herself back together and we headed 
back to the trailer to drop Joe for his nap.  
	Twenty minutes later I was hot and sweating, waiting for 
cool-as-cucumber-Tawny to return with the tribe of girls. I 
rummaged through the sack and drank another bottle of water. On 
the very log I had hid behind with the binoculars, I set up the mini 
digital video camera I had smuggled In my back pack, then sat 
down in the shade just outside the clearing and tried to meditate. 
Just as I was beginning to induce the state, I heard the excited 
chirping of the girls a few hundred yards away.  I switched on the 
camera, hid it a little with some bark, and started searching for my 
retarded self. I found him,  slipped him on, and watched as they 
came into view. 
	The girls were in bikinis with shining wet hair. They had all 
been swimming.  They stood back glaring at me. Tawny speaking 
reassuringly to them. 
	"See, he's cute isn't he?"  She said. 
	"One of the younger ones said, "He's old." 
	"Naw, he ain't old, he just looks it. Really he ain't much older 
than old Joe.   Sides, nothing wrong with older anyways long as 
he's cute."
	The girls just stood there gawking at me. I didn't move, just 
kept the dumb look on my face.   
	Tawny became impatient and said, "Okay, well iff'n ya don't 
wanna play, it's okay. I'll jus go an have him all to mysef."
	The brave older beauty broke the ice and stepped forward.  
Coming right up to me, I shied away slightly like she might hit me, 
"Shh, it's okay" she said, "I ain't gonna hurt you.   What's your 
name?" She asked, squatting down beside me. 
	"Robbie" I said in my thick Joe speak.
	Hearing this the other girls moved forward, somewhat 
reassured.
	"And what do you want Robbie?" She asked softly in my ear. 
	I painted a sweet and stupid smile on and replied, "Shirt off"
	With that the girl went back and started assembling and 
reassuring the other girls.   Tawny came over to me and lifted me 
up, guiding me just like she had Joe to the spot where the opening 
ritual takes place.   But this time, Tawny went to get in line with the 
other girls instead of being a bystander. I smiled and winked at her, 
then acted like it was a fly on my nose. 
	Tawny addressed the group quickly saying that she had 
taught me how to play already so I knew what to say.   I ran 
through the ritual with all the skill of a horny retard. Soon the glade 
was again full of naked nymphs dancing gaily. When I had 
dropped my pants, the tall girl stopped dancing and came up to me 
examining my penis. She turned and ran to her friend, whispering 
in her ear, both of them measuring me with their eyes. They stayed 
serious for a while, talking. Seeming satisfied with whatever they 
had decided, they returned to the dance. I positioned myself just 
inside the ring of girls, their soft fingers touching my penis as they 
passed.  The circle slowed as before and touches became more 
sensual and exploratory.  Soon, I was on my back on a bed of 
young girls bikini tops and bottoms, the girls standing over me as if 
retarded people couldn't see.  All I could see were tight butts, slits, 
mounds and nipples. 
	While I was soaking in the sights near my head, the tall 
ringleader was first in line and stood straddling me. Her lovely 
pussy staring down at me. She sat down and placed my hands on 
her breasts before starting. Slowly she began rocking, sliding her 
slit along the length of my hard erect penis, urging her juices to 
begin flowing. I twiddled her nipples, which made her jump and 
she looked me in the eyes. I glared back with a stupid smile. The 
girl might have failed with Joe because she was too dry. I couldn't 
help her along so I just lay there, cupping her breasts, trying to 
point my head at her opening.  Soon she began trying to force 
herself on me. She was incredibly tight and my erection bent 
painfully at her thrusts and I winced in pain. Tawny stopped her. 
	"Stop, you're hurting him" She said, and reluctantly the girl 
got up.  Next in line was her shorter but very pretty brunette friend 
who had instigated the lying down position with Joe. 
	This girl took some initiative and laid down on top of me and 
kissed me gently on the mouth. I wrapped my arms around her and 
cupped her petite butt in my hands. I could see Tawny anxiously 
watching, whispering to her friend, apparently spinning her plan to 
get her to try.  Tawny's friend was the same height as Tawny, but 
she weighed probably twenty pounds more. But this was a good 
thing for her. The weight was evenly distributed and her milky 
smooth skin was without a blemish anywhere. She had long blond 
hair and brown eyes and a very pretty face. Her breasts were 
small points standing out from her chest, half the size of Tawny's.  
She was next in line. 
	The second girl was failing as well, mainly because of the 
awkward way she held her hips. The tall girl tried helping her and 
might have succeeded if Tawny hadn't called, "Next!" 
	Tawny's pretty friend smiled and giggled as she stepped over 
me and squatted down. Her clitoris pointing out like the tip of a 
pencil.  She reached down and stood my penis up straight and 
began trying to impale herself on me. Apparently she and Tawny 
had devised a strategy.  It might have worked if she had any of her 
juices flowing. I reached up and began twiddling her nipples. The 
sensations were strong as if tickling her and she pushed my hands 
away. I reached out again and gently cupped my hands over her 
smooth chest.  She tolerated this fine and I soon felt her nipples 
harden in my palms. Her squatting position got tiring, so she laid 
down on me and gave little effort to bring me inside her. It seemed 
her heart just wasn't in it.  
	I saw Tawny approach, thinking she was going to call 'time', 
but instead she whispered to her friend and they plotted for 
another assault on her maidenhead.   She got up. Faced my feet 
and sat down on my stomach, causing me to lurch in pain.  She lay 
back, her blond hair covering my face, and lifted her hips.  Tawny 
was guiding my erection for her, but she wasn't forcing herself 
down. It seems she thought my penis was a snake that will crawl 
it's way up in her.  Getting frustrated, I thrust for her. Seeing this, 
the tall girl spoke urgently to me, "Yeah, do that some more 
Robbie" I thrust again, and the girls cheered me on.  The girl on top 
of me had her legs open nicely, but she was up pretty far onto my 
stomach that at the end of my thrust, the head of my penis only 
slightly pushed at her opening. So on one of my thrusts, I tensed 
my abs, bouncing her up and I ooched her down about two inches. 
Now I was pressing against her. Each thrust was working her 
modest juices out of her opening and onto my penis.  After a 
minute or two of this, the girl was feeling the swoon start to take 
hold of her, my hands massaging her breasts and her vagina 
being hammered continuously.  All of a sudden she let loose a 
steady flow of juices and my head was disappearing inside of her.  
The girls faces stared in wonder. Soon I was pushing her hymen 
and she was squeaking and trying to get up.  I released her and 
she rolled off of me, smiling at her friends who were looking at her 
proudly. 
	Next the ten year old was ushered to the front by the older 
girls. Her slight frame was perfectly shaped and her breasts were 
similar to Tawny's friend's - points that stick out like small cones.  
She had a dark tan with three white triangles if viewed from the 
front. The helping hands had her sprawled just like the girl before, 
since it was the only success any of them had had so far. Stick 
with what works I guess. But the young girl was having none of it. 
She wanted to do it her way, so she told one of the other girls to 
hold it up for her and she skillfully rocked herself against the head, 
getting it to slip inside due to the wetness already on me.  She 
continued the rocking, my head still just inside her opening and not 
really moving with her rocking, until I felt it slip in a little farther. With 
this, I started thrusting a little and to my amazement, a flood of 
moisture rushed out of her and I was sliding in and out of this very 
young girl with a wonderful feeling building in my loins from her 
tight and slippery channel.  I pulled her down to me and held her 
against me, her knees at my sides, the girls were exclaiming how 
she was taking me in.  I was careful not to thrust beyond their 
virginal barriers.   I kept screwing her up, letting her decide how 
deep, until she shuddered from her first intercourse induced 
orgasm of her life. Just as this happened, her clamping vagina 
squeezing down on my erection as I continued to thrust to 
hopefully draw out her orgasm to its full length, the climax welled 
up in me very suddenly and I had to pull out and pump my sperm 
onto her back and into her butt crack.   When she had returned to 
her friends, I heard her say, "It was awesome, it felt really good."  
and them responding, "You made him squirt!"  and then, "Get it off 
me!"   Two girls used a napkin from Tawny's pack and wiped the 
sperm from her back, holding it out like toxic waste before pitching 
it into the woods. 
	Tawny gently cleaned my penis with a napkin she moistened 
with water from her pack. I was going limp quickly but she sweetly 
continued rubbing me. With all the naked girls gathering above my 
head again, I was soon hardening again. Tawny sat on me next 
and placed my hands on her breasts, smiling so sweetly with her 
warm blushed cheeks. I was so ready to feel the deep penetration 
I had to starve myself of with the other girls. Leaning over and 
kissing me, we quickly had me slipping easily into her vagina, not 
wasting any time. The girls chatter hushed into stunned silence as 
Tawny gave them a clear view of her slight young body taking me 
entirely in to the hilts, and then moaning great pleasure for them to 
hear. She fucked me proper for several minutes, sitting up straight, 
impaled, and then lying back on top of me so I could thrust at her.  
She climaxed dramatically for her friends, shivering and curling her 
toes, face raised to the sky.  She slumped for a short moment, then 
got up. Tawny made me stand up, and she immediately laid down 
on the bikinis. Opening her legs wide to me, she made a very 
seductive expression on her face, and her loosened vagina was 
moist and gaping open slightly from having been stretched a few 
moments prior - It all said "Fuck me again!" and this time it was for 
all the glory, to elevate her to the pinnacle of being the sexiest, 
bravest, most erotic member of the group.   Of course the other 
girls were speechless, especially when my clenching buttocks 
indicated that I was thrusting inside her sweet young pussy again. 
Now the girls could see Tawny's face, eyes closed, biting her lip, 
moaning. Her head bouncing with my persistant thrusts.  I helped 
her to romanticize the show for the benefit of the audience by 
kissing her deeply while waiting for the impending ejaculation to 
subside, then driving deep for several more thrusts. Seeing this, 
two of the younger girls kissed on the mouth. While watching them, 
I was distracted from trying not to cum, which I had to do all the 
time while fucking young nymphets. It rose in my loins and as I 
considered, I decided to cum inside Tawny. 
	Why?  Well, I had just cum on the other girl a few minutes 
before, and there is always residual sperm inside the penis that 
seeps out during a subsequent intercourse, tens of thousands of 
the little dears, so I was going to have to provide her with some 
kind of post-intercourse contraception anyway, so what the hell? 
	I didn't realize that being able to continue pumping and 
thrusting into Tawny while I was racked with spasms of ejaculation 
would make the experience so much more extreme than the first 
time we did it.  It was amazingly wonderful, and Tawny felt it too. 
	After that, I was ready to get going, wanting to spend the 
moments and hours following such a mating holding her and 
caressing her to sleep in my arms, alone and away from all of 
these eyes.
	As soon as I rose from Tawny, the other girls helped her up: 
not out of concern for her, but to allow another girl to take her 
place. The 13 year old girl, the one that could easily be a 
supermodel with her perfectly pert breasts,  laid down and struck 
the same pose Tawny had so successfully demonstrated for them. 
Her legs were wide open and a glint of sunlight reflected off of the 
moisture at her opening. She tried her best to put on the 'come 
hither and fuck me' look, but it was laced with doubt and a little 
fear. 
	I had to stand over her for a few moments, stroking myself 
back to erection. I wasn't sure if I would have it in me to fuck them 
all, if that was their intent.  I decided that I would burst any girls 
maidenhead that laid down, fuck her until she had an orgasm, then 
move on to the next, without trying to cum myself.  To avoid any 
problems, I lifted the back of her knees until her hips had rocked 
upward, aiming her now open vaginal lips in line with my penis.  
Then I realized that I couldn't do it. 
	Here I had the most perfectly formed and wonderfully 
sculpted young girl spread open to me and I knew that I couldn't 
fuck her. Looking down between her legs at the head of my dick 
an inch from her open vagina, a drip of sperm hung there 
hopefully.  It reminded me, the me in the head on my shoulders, 
that if I did, there was the chance that she would become pregnant 
from the residual sperm still swimming in my penal vein. And I had 
no way to get a contraceptive to her or explain anything to her 
because I'm a retarded idiot. Up untill this point, I had done pretty 
well at covering my tracks. If I went on down this reckless path I 
would end up with a baby that proclaims me as its father through 
its DNA. These girls were equally as blind to what was happening 
as I had momentarily become. They were so worked up into their 
erotic competition with each other that they couldn't see that 
1+1=3.
	I got up and walked stupidly down the trail towards the cabin, 
still naked. The beauty sat up in shocked disappointment. Tawny 
came after me, wondering what was wrong. She tried stopping me 
to find out but I continued walking until we were far enough to be 
out of earshot of the other girls. 
	"Robbie, what's wrong?" She said, genuinely concerned. 
	Quietly I spoke to her, keeping my back to the clearing.  
"Tawny, I have to stop. Those girls could get pregnant if I do it any 
more. I'll explain it to you later but I can't put it inside any of the girls 
any more."
	"Oh." she said, then quickly made up her mind,  "Okay."  She 
took my arm and led me back. There were concerned looks on the 
faces of all the girls as we entered the clearing. A few of them had 
started putting their clothes back on. 
	"It's okay, he just had to pee."  She said, making me wonder 
how she planned on handling the issue.
	The beautiful 13 year old was lying back down and Tawny 
didn't seem to be concerned. What was she cooking up? 
	"Well, go on Robbie, ya big dork, git up inside her!" She said.
	The beauty was prone with her legs wide open again, 
holding her arms out to me greedily, her fear seemingly 
evaporated.  I glanced at Tawny as I slowly lowered myself down 
and she smiled her devious smile, which told me she had 
everything under control. So I raised her knees again, lined my 
hard penis up with her wet opening and...
	"Any of you girls that have a baby, don't you say nothing bout 
me and Robbie or Joe, you just say you got it from some boy you 
didn't know. Okay?"
	This started a flurry of discussion. The 13 year old thrust me 
off with her raised knees and scrambled to her feet. The sweet 
little 10 year old began crying, the other girls trying to console her 
to no affect. I got up and whispered to Tawny to explain to the 
young girl that she won't get pregnant: That I didn't get any inside 
her. Tawny whispered back to me saying that she knew that she 
(herself) had lots of sperm my inside her, what about that? I told 
her not to worry and that I would explain what we would do during 
the walk back to the cabin. 
	The girl calmed down after Tawny had spoken with her, and 
she even smiled and laughed in relief eventually. The beautiful 13 
year old was dressed and sprinting out of the clearing in record 
time, feeling she had just dodged a bullet. Tawny made some quick 
plans to see her new friend again and they talked excitedly about 
Tawny attending her school in the fall. On the trail back to the cabin 
we talked about everything I assured her I would get a 'morning 
after' pill. 
	"Can you get more than one?" She asked.
	"I suppose.  I'm not sure how much they will cost, but I'll see."
	"Oh, they're 'spensive? Shoot.  I sure do love it when you 
squirt all up inside me. It feels.. it's hard to explain, kinda like the 
sperm is what it's all for. When I feels it, it means it's all done, right 
and proper, and I can sleep like it's sleepin medicine inside.  Feels 
different, lots better than the first time when you squirted all over 
me. I can still feels it. It's coming out on my underwear."
	"I'm sorry, I didn't really mean to." I said.
	"Shucks, I don't mind. I likes it. 

This ends book one of the story of Tawny Jenkins. Book two will 
detail the relationship between Rob and Grace and how he and 
Tawny manipulate her mother into allowing her daughter to be 
intimate with Rob, culminating in a threesome; The building of the 
lake and lodge and the glorious day when they moved in; The 
creation of a beach on the pristine shoreline and the antics of the 
woodland nymphs bathing, frolicking, and copulating there (Tawny 
being armed with modern pharmaceutical contraceptives for her 
friends).

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