I looked at her standing there naked except for a pair of high heels. She ran her hands over her breasts and smiled at me, "You like?" I smiled back at her, stroked my cock and said, "No, I don’t like, I love."

Oh baby, for a young man you sure do know the right things to say."

As she walked toward me I thought, "Thank God for trashy Southern girls. If it wasn’t for one of them I wouldn’t be here and loving this."

She sank down on her knees in front of me and said, "Stop playing with yourself young man. You know that’s my job."

I stopped stroking myself and leaned back to enjoy what was coming. As her mouth closed around me I said, "Yes mom."

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Helen was the product of one of those little hollows that surround the coal fields of Bluefield, West Virginia. Somehow she had managed to scrape up enough money (a cousin of hers later told me she got most of it on her back) for a bus ticket to Detroit. She got off of the Gray Dog in downtown Detroit with just enough money for s cup of coffee and a donut.

She had an aunt and a cousin in town that she was going to stay with. But no way to get in touch with them at two o’clock in the morning. She asked a porter at the bus station was and he directed her to the Layayette. She walked over to it and when the room clerk told her the price of the room she told him she had no money and asked if they couldn’t maybe come to an arrangement of some kind. He looked her over and told her that they might be able to work something out. When Helen called her aunt the next morning she’d had five hours sleep, had $186 in her purse and was walking slightly bow-legged.

I got all this from her cousin Roxie who was trying to convince me that Helen wasn’t bad, just a survivor.

"She did what she had to do to get by. She never did it again after she found a job."

The reason that Roxie was trying to sell me on Helen was because I had just dumped her. The reason I dumped her is that one of the men she had "played" with at the Lafayette had come into the restaurant where Helen worked, recognized her, and had tried to set up another "date." I wasn’t there at the time, but I got the story from someone who was – my mother.

Helen’s aunt picked her up, took her home and got her settled in. The next day Helen was out looking for a job and found one as a waitress in the same restaurant where my mother worked. The two of them clicked and my mother decided to play matchmaker. The next time I was in the restaurant my mother introduced us.

"She’s new in town baby, hasn’t had time to find a boyfriend so you better strike while the iron is hot" and she walked off leaving me and Helen to feel awkward about the situation. But Helen was extremely good looking and I dug her cute Southern accent. I started going by the restaurant more frequently and always seemed to get waited on by Helen. Eventually I asked her out and we had a good time. Soon we were dating a couple of times a week and after three months we were more or less going steady. Another six months went by and I decided to pop the question and Helen said yes. We went shopping for an engagement ring and that afternoon Helen hurried to the restaurant and showed it to my mother. My mother squealed for joy, hugged Helen, and welcomed her to the family.

One month later she was trying to break us up.

First it was, "The two of you are too young to be getting married. This is the time of life for you to get out and experience things, not tie yourself down."

When that didn’t seem to do the trick she started insinuating that Helen wasn’t on the up and up with me.

"I know she is seeing other guys baby. Just last night while you were at work she left with one."

I’d been there before with mom. I was her baby and she apparently didn’t want to lose me to someone else. Helen wasn’t the first girl that mom had tried to break me away from. This time however I was in a committed relationship and I wasn’t going to give up on it just because my mother was being over-protective or possessive. The more I resisted, the harder she tried and one day I’d finally had enough and I told her to give it up. Helen and I were going to be married and that was that.

"Baby, trust me on this one please. She isn’t right for you. You will be making a terrible mistake if you marry Helen."

"What terrible mistake? What can be so bad?"

"She’s a whore baby. She sells herself for money."

"Oh bullshit mom; that’s low even for you. I’ve let you come between me and every other girl I’ve ever liked, but not this time."

"It’s true baby. I talked with one of the men she sold herself to."

"I don’t believe a word of it."

"He is still around baby and you can ask him yourself."

"Why would he come to you with a story like that?"

"He didn’t. I overheard him trying to set up a date with her and later I told him what I’d heard and then I told him I’d like the full story since Helen was going to be marrying you. He said he was downtown one night and Helen was at the Lafayette Hotel turning tricks. He says he knows for a fact that she screwed at least five men that night besides him. He came in her for dinner one night, recognized her and was talking to her about setting up another meeting when I overheard them."

"I’m sorry mom, but I just don’t believe it."

"You can ask him yourself. He has breakfast in here almost every morning. The night he recognized Helen was the first time he had ever come in for dinner and since Helen works the afternoon shift he had never seen her in here before."

"He’s wrong. He must be mistaken."

"You are a grown man baby and I’m guessing that you and Helen have been naked together a time or two. He says she has a birthmark in the shape of a cat’s paw on her left thigh. Does she?"

She did, but for some reason I wasn’t going to tell my mother that. The fact that I didn’t set the stage for what happened next.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I was having a hard time getting my head around what my mom had told me. I didn’t believe it. Even though she knew about Helen’s birthmark it didn’t prove anything; she could have found out about it some other way. And so what if some guy offered her a ride home after work. It beat waiting on the DSR and then having to transfer at Seven Mile and wait on another bus. No, just up to her old tricks. Still, the more I thought about it the more I had to know for certain.

I asked mom who the customer was who had recognized Helen and she told me to stop in for breakfast the next day and she would point him out. The next morning I slid into the booth across from him, introduced myself and told him that I needed to know what he knew about my future bride.

"Are you sure that you want to know? People change boy. Drug addicts give up the needle and alcoholics kick the habit. No reason a hooker can’t quit and live a straight life."

"That doesn’t matter. I just have to know. What did she say when you tried to arrange a date with her?"

"She didn’t say yes and she didn’t say no, but that could have just as well been because she was my waitress and didn’t want to blow her tip."

"What happened at the Lafayette?"

"I’d been out drinking with some friends and we got a little too sloshed to drive home. We checked into the Lafayette and one of the group asked the desk clerk where he might be able to find a girl and the clerk set it up. There were six of us. Ben said no, that his wife would kill him if she ever found out, but the other five of us shelled out seventy-five bucks apiece and she visited each of us in our rooms."

I just stared at the man. I didn’t want to believe him, but he had no reason to lie to me.

"Let me get a little personal here son. Good sex is one of the glues that makes a marriage and helps hold it together. It doesn’t matter where the experience comes from, it is the experience itself that counts. You aren’t going to your marriage bed a virgin, are you?"

I shook my head no.

"So why should you expect her to? What she did before she met you doesn’t matter anymore than what you did before you met her."

I left his table even more confused than I had been when I sat down.

Next, I decided to see for myself what Helen did on the nights I had to work late. I did some shift trading with some of the guys I worked with and when Helen got off work I was waiting down the block watching. The first night she came out she caught the bus. The next night she left with a guy, he drove her home, she leaned over and kissed him on the cheek and went inside the house and he drove away. The third and fourth night it was the bus again.

I started out the fifth night knowing that I was wasting my time. Helen came out of the restaurant with the same guy who had driven her home the second night. He drove her straight home, but this time they sat in the car and talked. Then Helen leaned over to give him what I expected to be a kiss on the cheek, but it turned into a steamy necking session that ended up fogging up the windows of the car. I don’t know if Helen fucked him or not because I’d seen enough and I drove away. Whether she fucked him or not did not matter because the bottom line was that when you are engaged to be married you don’t sit in a car with another guy and swap tongues for half an hour. If you can do that you can just as easily fuck the guy. I drove home to get good nights rest before having my confrontation with Helen the next day.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I’d only been in bed fifteen minutes when my bedroom door opened and my mother came in to my room. She was wearing a bathrobe and I remember thinking that it was weird that she was fully made up and wearing high heels and a bathrobe at two in the morning.

"How you feeling baby?"

"Okay I guess."

"Honey, I know what you are going through and I know why. For the first time in your life you have an unlimited and steady supply of sex and it is clouding your mind to everything else. You won’t accept what Helen is because that would mean you would be back to hunting for sex again. Almost every segment of society frowns on what I am going to do, but I am so certain that Marrying Helen will ruin your life that I’m going to do it anyway."

She let the robe fall from her shoulders and stood there naked in front of me. I should have said that I finally realized that what she had said about Helen was true and that I was going to end things between us, but I couldn’t. Helen was a sexy girl, but standing in front of me was a sexy woman. That it was my mother didn’t mean a damned thing to my cock which had leapt to attention. Mom giggled and said:

"I see that you are not entirely opposed to the idea."

She got on the bed with me, reached for my hard cock and said, "I’ll make you forget her baby. I’ll see to it that you have a steady supply of sex and you won’t even have to leave the house to get it. Did Helen do this for you baby?" she asked as she bent and took me in her mouth.

It was a long night and an exhausting one. I woke up in the morning and my first thought was not, "Oh my God, what have we done," it was, "What the fuck about dad?"

I asked mom and she said, "We will just have to cool it when he is around. This is the first time that I haven’t minded that he is an over-the-road truck driver. We’re good until the day after tomorrow and then we will just have to work it out. You rested baby? Want to start your day out right?"

After mom left for work I spent the rest of the morning wrestling with how I was going to break it off with Helen and in the end I decided that quick and soon would be best. I called Helen, but she wasn’t up yet and her aunt took a message. I told her to tell Helen that I would be there to pick her up and drive her to work. I was there a little early and as Helen got in the car she asked, "What’s the special occasion?"

"Just something on my mind that I need to take care of."

"That sounds ominous."

"I guess it does at that. The thing is that I made a mistake and I need to rectify it."

"What mistake was that?"

"I picked the wrong girl to get engaged to."

Helen stared at me in silence for several moments and then, "Your mother put you up to this, right?"

"No, as a matter of fact you did. Granted that my mother did give me the information that I acted on, but you are the one who made it happen."

"Do I get an explanation or are you just going to kick me out of the car?"

"Mom overheard your conversation with Ralph and later she asked Ralph for clarification."

"And Ralph is?"

"One of the men you entertained at the Lafayette Hotel."

"Oh."

"That’s it? Just "Oh?"

"I won’t apologize for anything I did before I met you or explain it."

"Not even when it speaks to the kind of woman you might be?"

"Sweetie, let me give it to you cold. I’m the kind of person who will do whatever I have to do to survive. It was before I met you and I’m sorry that you found out about it and let it cloud your judgement where I am concerned."

"I’d be willing to accept that what you did before you met me should have no bearing on us now except for the fact that what you did at the Lafayette shows what you are capable of. No Helen, what you did at the Hotel is not what did in our relationship; it is what you did at the hotel in conjunction with what you did last night that ended it for us."

"What are you talking about?"

"I got off work early last night and I stopped by the restaurant to give you a ride home. I got there just as you got in some guy’s car and pulled away. No biggie, right? Guys are giving you a ride home all the time. I followed you figuring that we could sit in the car and neck or maybe go to a motel, but when you got home you didn’t get out of he car. I sat and watched you as you and the guy steamed up the windows to the point where I couldn’t see what you what you were doing anymore. You started out necking and you could have finished fucking for all I know. After half an hour I’d seen enough and I left. Don’t bother with an "I can explain" because I won’t believe it. I might have if it hadn’t been for the business at the Lafayette, but like I said, what you did at that hotel in conjunction with what you did in that car last night speaks to the kind of woman you are. No woman engaged to be married to another man should have done what you did last night."

I pulled up in the restaurant parking lot, stopped and waited for her to get out. She looked at me without speaking for almost a full minute and then she slipped off her engagement ring, set it on the seat between us and got out of the car. She walked into the restaurant and she never looked back.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Mom was waiting for me when I got home from work. She was wearing high heels, nylons and a garter belt and that was all.

"I could tell from the way Helen was at work today that you ended it."

I shrugged and nodded a yes.

"I’m sorry baby, I know that it was hard for you to do and I do feel that it was all my fault. After all, I was the one who thought she would be right for you and got you together. Come on baby, let me try and ease the pain" and she took me by the hand and led me to her bedroom.

I know that this is going to sound weird, but even though my mom had climbed into my bed the night before and fucked my brains out this night I couldn’t get it up. I kept thinking, "This is my mother, this is wrong and I’ll surely go to hell if I fuck her." Why I didn’t have those thoughts the night before I don’t know, but it probably had something to do with my head still trying to get around the problem with Helen and what she had done. Whatever the reason, my dick just would not get hard. Mom stroked it, sucked on it and did her best to make something happen, but nothing did. Finally she gave it up as a lost cause and cuddled up with me and we went to sleep.

I don’t know what difference eight hours of sleep made, but my cock wasn’t the least bit reluctant the next morning. I thought I was having an erotic dream, but what it was was my mother sucking my cock. I woke up to her head bobbing up and down on my cock and things just went from there. When I finally climbed out of bed at one in the afternoon I barely had enough strength to get dressed for work. I managed to get through my shift and when I got home I found a naked mother on my bed.

"Come on baby, we have a lot to get done tonight. Your father will be home sometime tomorrow afternoon and we will have to be good until he goes on another run."

"What about your promise to keep me in steady pussy?"

I was joking when I said it so I was a little surprised when she said, "I did say that, didn’t I. Well, I guess we will just have to find a way. I hope you like sloppy seconds because your father usually can’t keep his hands off me when he is home."

Mom wore me out and I fell asleep exhausted only to be awakened by one of her superb blow jobs. It was a morning filled with sex until about noon and then mom said:

"One more time lover and then I have to start getting ready for your father’s homecoming."

The next two days were sexless for me as my father kept my mother fully occupied. The third evening my dad was home my mother asked me to run her to the store and I had the unique experience of making love to my mother on the back seat of my car in a far and dark corner of the super market parking lot. I had already cum once and was getting my second piece when mom went, "Oh my god" and her nails dug into my ass.

"What’s wrong?"

"The window, the window baby, the window."

I looked up and saw two young guys standing there and watching us. Their watching turned mom on and she started screaming:

"Fuck me you mother fucker, pound your mother fucking cock into me and make me cum. Fuck your whore baby, fuck your whore and make her cum."

She had never talked like that before when we made love. Just made a lot of noises, moans, little cries and grunts. She wrapped her legs tight around me and yelled loud enough to be heard half a dozen cars away, "Fuck me hard mother fucker, push it deep, fuck me like the whore that I am."

When I came and my limp dick slid out of her super hot pussy she was still looking up at the window where the two guys were still standing and watching.

"You want me to let them in the car?"

"Oh god yes. I want them, both of them, but I can’t baby. Get me out of here baby, get me out of here before I do something really, really stupid."

On the way home I asked, "Do you have any boyfriends or lovers?"

"Good God no. Why would you even ask me a question like that?"

"Well, dad’s gone a lot and you do seem to have an immense appetite for sex."

"Yes I do baby, but I happen to love your father and I keep myself just for him."

I looked at her and raised an eyebrow at that.

"It’s true baby. I won’t say I haven’t been tempted, god knows that I surely was tonight when I saw those two watching, but my pussy belongs to your father." She paused for a second or so and then said, "And to you of course."

There was a silence and I think she misread it because then she said, "Your mother is not a whore or a slut young man. I know what I’m doing with you isn’t right, but you are my baby and it is a mother’s duty to protect her babies. I honestly feel that you marrying Helen would be a horrendous mistake and I did what I thought I had to do. It’s wrong and maybe it wasn’t the only or best way to break the two of you up, but I didn’t think that I had a lot of time to ponder the alternatives. You don’t have to baby. You could just say "Thanks, but no thanks" if you want to. Is that what you would rather?"

For an answer I pulled over onto a dark side street, parked and turned to her, "Get on the back seat you slut."

"Honestly baby" she said, as she was climbing over the seat back, "That is no way for you to talk to your mother."

Dad was home six days and mom did her best to fit me in where she could while he was home. Her theory – her reason – for climbing into my bed was to see that I got a steady supply of pussy to replace what she thought I had been getting from Helen. I never told her that even the hit or miss sex I was getting from her while dad was home was more than I was getting from Helen. In fact, before my dad got home, I was getting more from mom in one night than I got from Helen in a week. Then dad was off on a nine day run and he was no sooner out of sight when mom grabbed me.

"Come on baby, we have some catching up to do."

I just could not believe the sexual appetite of that woman. She was always ready, always after me to do it, "just one more time baby, please?" I got to thinking I’d like to see her with the two guys who had watched us and maybe even a half dozen more just to see if she had a limit. I was in hog heaven; a great looking woman was fucking my brains out and giving me all the sex I could handle and I didn’t even have to leave the house to get it.

But something was missing and that something was Helen.

I missed her smile, I missed sitting and holding her and being held by her and I missed all of those little things that you never seem to notice at the time. The way she would reach over and move a stray lock of hair on my forehead, smile, look into my eyes and tell me she loved me. I missed the way she would rub her foot on my ankle when we were sitting and watching TV or talking; the way she would lay her head on my chest and trace little patterns on my stomach with her fingernails after we’d made love. I missed the way that she could never seem to be in a room with me without having to touch me in some way. I just flat assed missed her.

It was the day after my dad left on his trip and it was mom’s week to open the restaurant in the morning. She woke me with a blow job, we had a spirited session on my bed and then she had showered, dressed and gone to work. I didn’t need to be to work until two so I was lying in bed relaxing in that warm after glow you get after good sex. The doorbell rang and I looked over at the clock and saw it was ten after nine in the morning. I put on a robe and went to answer the door. It was Helen’s aunt. As soon as the door was opened she pushed her way past me saying:

"I need to talk to you boy."

I debated just going on outside and getting in my car and going for a drive until she got tired of waiting and left, but curiosity finally got the best of me and I closed the door and followed her into the living room. She cut right to the chase.

"Why did you break that poor girls heart? She hasn’t slept and barely eats a bite and her eyes are staying red from crying all the time. How in the name of our Lord could you do that to her?"

"Apparently she has told you what I did, but did she tell you why?"

"She did and it don’t matter none. You were the first good thing to ever happen to that poor child and she gave you her heart and you stomped on it. I just wanted to come over here, look you in the eye and tell you what a rotten bastard you are and that I hope that you rot in hell."

And with that she stomped out of the house, got in her car and drove away. What a nice way to start the day I thought, but it wasn’t over yet. I was just leaving for work when the phone rang and it was Helen’s cousin Rocxie.

"Any chance we can get together for a talk?"

"If it is going to be more fire and brimstone like I just got from your mother no thanks.’

"Mom can get a little excited at times, but no, I just need to talk."

I made arrangements to meet her after work at a bar not too far from where I work.

She was sitting in a booth when I got there. We exchanged pleasantries and then I said, "What’s this about Roxs?"

"You’re not stupid, you know it is about Helen."

"Thank you, but I’ve already gotten the "You are a rotten bastard" speech from your mother."

"Yeah, well like I said, mom does get a little carried away sometimes. I’m not here to call you names. I just wanted to know why you did what you did to Helen. There has to be more to it than what she is saying."

"What is she saying?"

"That you got upset because she was kissing some guy."

"That’s it?"

"She said a guy drove her home from work one night and you saw here kissing him and the next day you broke up with her."

"Well, you are right, there is a little bit more to the story than that" and I proceeded to lay it all out for her. "So, there you have it. Putting the hotel history together with the steamy make out session I watched for over half an hour gave me the picture of a girl that I decided wasn’t right for me."

She looked at me silently for a bit and then, "Has Helen ever told you about what life was like in the hollows of West Virginia and what she had to look forward to there?"

I shook my head no.

"First, there is the abject poverty, a poverty so pervasive that it makes the slums of Detroit look like the Promised Land. Next is the culture. Most girls that live back in those hollows have lost their virginity before they even reach puberty and it has normally been taken by a family member – father, brother, uncle or cousin – and most of them end up pregnant because of it. It is a world where first cousins marry and families inter-breed and it isn’t uncommon for a girl to reach her eighteenth birthday with four or five kids clutching at the hem of her skirt. Helen was lucky. Her father is a God fearing man who also happens to be big and mean and he put out the word that he would kill any man who touched her and everyone who heard him knew that he meant it. But even with an over protective father to keep her from harm it was a place she knew she had to get away from.

"I’m going to give you the worst. She got out by sneaking out behind her father’s back and giving herslf to men for money. As soon as she had enough for a bus ticket she ran. I’m not surprised to hear about the Lafayette. She sold her body to save herself so what was one more time? She is a survivor and she will do whatever she has to do keep herself going. I do know that she hasn’t been with any man other than you since the day she came to live with mom and me. As for the guy she necked with? I don’t know, but I can make a pretty good guess. No girl wants to be standing alone at a bus stop in Detroit at one in the morning if she can help it. If this guy kept giving her a ride home and wanted to keep doing it she was certainly going to let him.

"I’m not stupid and neither are you. We both know what he was after – he wanted to get between her legs – and she knew that too. But how to keep getting rides without giving up what he was after? She had to lead him on a little at a time, give him a little something to keep him coming around until she had enough money saved up to buy her a car. So she necked with him and I wouldn’t be a bit surprised to find out that she didn’t slap him when he tried to cop a feel, but he was never going to hit pay dirt. He didn’t know it, but he never had a chance in hell of getting into her pants. Helen’s heart, body and soul belonged to you.

"I can’t even count the number of times we sat on my bed and talked the night away and it was mostly about you and how wonderful you were and how God must really love her to have sent her to you. She really believes that. She is certain that God sent her to Detroit and to that restaurant looking for a job for the specific purpose of getting the two of you together. I hate laying the burden on you, but you destroyed that girl."

"If her necking session was so innocent or if it was like you said why didn’t she tell me?"

"You would have listened? She knew it was a lost cause when you threw the hotel at her at the same time you threw the necking at her. Helen has a lot of pride and it will not let her beg, or plead for forgiveness. She has survivor’s traits – she is strong willed and she will face what gets thrown at her, learn from it and move on. She will eventually get over you, but it will take a long, long time and leave a lot of scars."

She finished her drink and got up.

"That’s it? You just wanted to ask a couple of questions?"

"What did you expect, that I was here to plead her case? Sorry, I learned a long time ago not to get involved in other people’s problems. I just wanted to know how something so good could go totally to shit in such a short time. You let the best thing that ever happened to you get away and I just hope for your sake that the rest of your life isn’t going to be as fucked up."

After Roxie was gone I sat in the bar and drank several more beers and thought about what she’d said, what Helen had done, what I had done and mostly what my thoughts about her had been. By the time last call came around I had boiled it all down to three things:

-Could I crawl back to her

-Would she take me back and

-What was my mother going to say

Mom was waiting up for me when I got home.

"Where have you been? I’ve been keeping something warm for you."

"Stopped for a beer or two after work."

"Well come on baby, I need to get up early to go to work."

"You go ahead and go on to bed mom. I’m not ready and I’ve got some things on my mind that I have to work through."

"You turning me down mister? After I’ve waited up for you? I don’t think so. When we are done and I am sleeping you can lie there in bed and work through whatever for as long as you want."

"Has anyone lately told you that you are an insatiable slut?"

"No, and you shouldn’t talk to me like that; after all, I am your mother. Now come along" and she took my hand and pulled me along behind her to the bedroom. For someone who wanted to get some sleep before getting up to go to work she sure wasn’t in any hurry to quit. Three times, with a blow job between each of the first two and she still wanted me to get up again. I pushed her away and told her to get some rest.

"I don’t want you so tired that you spill hot coffee in some poor guys lap."

She grumbled, but she got out of my bed and went to her bedroom.

Mom had gotten in the habit of waking me up in the morning with a blow job, but I was still awake and staring at the ceiling when she came into my room.

"Haven’t you been to sleep?"

"No, no I haven’t."

"Just what is this weighty problem that has you so concerned?"

"You won’t like it."

"But from the way you just said that I gather that it is something I’m going to eventually have to know so out with it."

I told her about the visit from Helen’s aunt, my talk with Roxie and about all the thoughts I’d been having. She just looked at me without saying a word until I was finished.

"Well baby, I won’t say that I like it or that I’m happy about it, but I can understand it. Little things like those you mentioned are just like the feelings I have for your father. I had hoped that I could screw the memory of Helen out of you, but I guess that I didn’t."

"Oh be honest mom. You just used Helen as an excuse. I saw the way you looked at those two guys who watched us. More than anything you wanted them in the car and if I hadn’t been there it probably would have happened. You are hitting your sexual peak and dad is never home. I’m betting you were on the very edge of starting to go out looking when the Helen thing came along and gave you an excuse. ‘What better way to get what I need with someone from someone who absolutely has to keep his mouth shut about it." Am I right?"

"Can’t put nothing over on you, can I?"

"So, what are you going to do?"

"I don’t know, I honestly don’t know."

"I’m going to have to go out and hit the bars after all huh?"

"No way. Give up my insatiable slut? Not a chance, at least not until I’m married."

"Hey baby, I won’t hold that against you. They say that married men make the best lovers. How about showing me what you got before I have to go to work."

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I asked the hostess to seat me in Helen’s section and I saw her raise an eyebrow. Every woman in the place probably knew what an asshole I’d been by now. When Helen came to wait on the table and saw that it was me she said, "Oh, it’s you. I’ll get you another waitress" and she started to walk away.

"No, I don’t want another waitress, I asked for your section."

"Why?"

"Look Helen, I’ve never had to crawl before so I don’t know how. Can you help me out here?"

"Why should I?"

I was at a loss as how to answer that. This damned sure wasn’t the girl who Roxie and her Aunt Ada said cried herself to sleep every night. I don’t know what I had expected when I came into the restaurant, but it sure wasn’t the cold, detached indifference that I was getting. I stared at her for several seconds and then said, "You’re right, why should you. I’ll have coffee and the special."

She took the order, wrote it down on her pad and left me sitting there wondering why I had even bothered. When she returned with my meal she set it down in front of me without a word and went to wait on other customers. I ate my meal, dropped enough money on the table to cover the tab and a tip and then I got up and left the restaurant. Helen was standing next to my car when I got to the parking lot. I stopped and looked at her and waited to see what she was going to do.

"If you want to talk you can meet me at my aunts when I get off work."

"Why don’t I just pick you up?"

I already have a ride and no way to get in touch with him to cancel."

"Oh. Should I bother?"

"That’s strictly up to you" and she went back into the restaurant.

I was sitting in my car across the street from Helen’s aunt’s house when she pulled up. Her ride was the same guy she had been necking with. They sat in his car and talked for almost five minutes before they leaned together and kissed. It was a long kiss and I was reaching for the ignition key to start the car and drive off when Helen got out of the car and came over and got in mine. She cut right to it.

"So, what’s with this crawl nonsense?"

"Just that I guess – nonsense. I’ve spent the last several days realizing that I love you, want to be with you and all the rest of that bullshit. After being yelled at by your aunt and talking to your cousin Roxie they left me with the impression that you felt the same way so I came to crawl and beg only to find out that your cousin and your aunt were obviously mistaken. It is evident from what I just saw that I was quickly replaced. Sorry to have wasted your time."

I started the car and waited for her to get out, but she just sat there looking at me and then she reached over and turned the ignition off.

"You haven’t been replaced because you can’t be replaced. You are my other half, the yin to my yang. When you left me you left a hole in my soul that can never be filled by someone else, but one of my many faults is that I am brutally honest – I won’t lie to anyone about anything and I certainly won’t lie to you. That little display in Doug’s car was for your benefit although Doug doesn’t know that. You say that you came crawling, but what you don’t realize is that you just might not want me anymore once you know the truth. You hurt me when you walked away from me. I cried my heart out for two days and then I told myself to stop with the self pity, to suck it up and get on with my life.

"But I was angry and when I’m angry I strike out. You didn’t want me any more because to you I was a whore so okay, fuck you, and I’ll be a whore and see that it gets back to you. Three days ago I fucked Doug’s brains out and last night I gave him a blow job in the restaurant parking lot. Doug is a loud mouthed braggart and I knew he would tell every one and that it would get back to you. Just to make sure it got back to you I sucked his cock in the parking lot. Enough people knew about it so it was a sure bet that it would get to your mother and through her to you. That was my way of putting you out of my thoughts and out of my life. You would hear about it, be disgusted and wouldn’t ever come into the restaurant any more as long as I worked there. I would never have to worry about seeing you again.

"Doug doesn’t mean shit to me; all he was was a stick to poke you in the eye with. So, there you are."

Well this was certainly a different kettle of fish. Catching her necking hot and heavy with some guy was a whole lot different than knowing g that she was sucking and fucking some other guy, but as I saw her reach for the door handle I realized that it didn’t mean any more than the guys in the hotel. We weren’t married and what she did after we took our vows is all that would matter.

"Where are you going?"

"Getting out of your car. I’m sure that the odor of whore is offensive to you."

"Did you take money for fucking him?"

"No, of course not."

Then you aren’t a whore. A slut maybe, and an easy piece of ass from Doug’s perspective, but not a whore. It will probably cause me some problems when Doug tells all and guys start swarming around my wife looking to get laid or get a quick parking lot blow job, but I’ll just have to deal with it."

"What are you saying?"

"Just what you have already said; I’m the yin to your yang. We were meant to be. So, unless you fell in love with Doug’s cock and don’t want me around any more, it is just one of life’s problems that we will have to work through."

"You really mean that?"

"I do."

And then she was crying and I was holding her.

"There is one major problem that you will have to face on your own."

"What’s that baby?"

"Well, you still work with my mother and now that we are back together you will have to face her every day knowing that she knows you give out parking lot blow jobs."

"All I can say to that is "Fuck her!"

And for some reason I had to smile at that.