A Change of Attitude
Brit cried out in ecstasy, her body tensing up. Her hips raised right up off of Jeff's lap as her body straightened. She held that position for a few seconds, not even breathing, then finally collapsed back onto him.
"Oh god!" she exclaimed. "What just happened to me?"
Jeff was stunned. Had she really just climaxed, right there? And did she not know what it was? He had a momentary temptation to tease her about it, then realized that that would be too cruel, even for him. She would run to her room crying, and he would feel bad the rest of the day. She might even be mad at him for several days after that, not a pleasant thought. And right now, he felt an unusual closeness to her; the last thing he wanted to do was hurt her. So he decided to just be honest and frank with her.
"Looks to me like you just had an orgasm," he told her.
"Really?" she asked. "Is that what it feels like?"
"You mean you've never had one before?"
She shook her head. "I never knew it could feel this good." She lay there panting against his chest for a few more minutes. Jeff didn't know what to do, so he just wrapped his arms around her and held her there in a tender embrace. He remembered his first orgasm, in Rachael's willing mouth. Afterward, he had felt so exhausted he just wanted to lie there forever, and it felt so good to have someone there with him to hold. Though it was a little inappropriate, he felt that Brit deserved the same treatment.
She lay in his arms long enough that he half thought that she had fallen asleep. He had to admit, watching her lie there in his arms was certainly calming. He realized with a bit of yearning that these moments with her were too few. Normally the two of them couldn't stand being in the same room together, but every so often, when they hugged or she slept in his bed for instance, he realized that he really did love her. When she wasn't being bratty, she really was a cute little girl, and it felt so nice to hold her in his arms like this.
No, she was not so little any more. Just a few minutes earlier she had just stopped being a child. If she was capable of having an orgasm, then she had a certain degree of maturity, at least physically if not emotionally. He wondered if this would change things between them, with him realizing that she was growing up.
Brit turned over and lay her head against his shoulder. Jeff's hand instinctively went up and he stroked her hair. She sighed; apparently she liked that.
This reminded him of the times when they were kids and she used to come and crawl into bed with him. Those were the times when he felt closest to her. But there were other times when they were almost at each other's throats. Sometimes he had teased her even to the point of tears. Now he felt a sudden guilt for all those incidents. She was his little sister; he was supposed to protect and watch over her, not hurt her.
"Brit, I'm sorry," he said.
"About what?" she mumbled without opening her eyes or taking her head off his shoulder.
"About teasing you all those times when we were growing up."
"What?" she asked. "What brought that on all of a sudden?"
"I just... this just reminded me of when you used to sleep with me when we were kids. Remember that?"
"Yeah. I miss those days."
"Me too. You used to do it even after I had spent all day teasing you. I was really mean back then, wasn't I?"
"Still are," she giggled.
"Hey, that's not fair."
"Sorry. I couldn't resist."
Then she lifted up her head and gazed into his eyes. She had a trace of a smile on her lips, and although her eyes were watery, she didn't look sad at all.
"Thanks for being there with me," she said, then gave him a quick peck on the cheek and climbed off of him and headed out of the room.
Still wondering what he should do at this point, he decided to view the rest of the images. Unfortunately, that was the last one of Greg and Lissa together. Allison replaced Lissa and continued to suck him off. Under most circumstances, Jeff would love to see these pictures. But after seeing that last picture with Lissa, and surprisingly, without Brit there to share it with him, the images no longer interested him. He quickly browsed through to the last one, then switched off the computer.
When he ascended the stairs to his room, he could hear the shower going. That was to be expected; Brit had just climaxed in her pants, so it was bound to be a bit messy.
He headed to his bed and plopped down on it, exhausted in his own way. This was more than just a physical exhaustion, it was emotional as well. He couldn't get that picture out of his mind! His own father, who had raised them in a sheltered environment for all their life, had done something sexual with his own daughter. There was a word for that: incest. It was one of those things that people just didn't do, that only existed as fantasies on the Internet. Maybe some people engaged in such acts, but those were perverts who lived a completely different lifestyle. It wasn't something one expected to discover about his own family.
But he couldn't lie to himself. When he saw that image, he had felt no revulsion, only excitement. He himself had those very feelings, and furthermore, he himself had done a few things with Lissa. He had rationalized that away by claiming that they had just been adolescents full of hormones and just learning about sex. Even during that last camping trip, it was still just an experiment. The contact between Lissa and Jeff wasn't even particularly sexual, just intimate. Despite those encounters with her, the truth was that the idea of incest in general sickened him.
But maybe it wasn't so unnatural after all. Maybe it was just the idea of the forbidden so close to home that had aroused him. Maybe it had nothing to do with Lissa at all. He was perfectly happy to admit that he thought Allison was hot, so it was perfectly natural for him to get aroused by those pictures of her leading up to it. So maybe his excitement at the taboo pictures was just a continuation of that, especially with those photos of Allison and Lissa together. Those lesbian scenes were enough to break down his resistance to seeing Lissa like that, so when their father joined in, maybe those feelings weren't so unexpected after all.
And as he thought about it, maybe that was exactly what had happened to Greg on the boat. Perhaps his own feelings followed a similar pattern: first seeing Allison naked, then seeing Lissa naked, then the two of them together.
The warm water of the shower helped to relax Brit so that she could think more clearly. Something had happened to her today that she couldn't ignore. Yesterday she was a child, but today she had begun to grow up.
It wasn't that she didn't know about sex. She at least had a technical understanding of it, even if she had never done it herself. Admittedly, she had been experimenting with giving herself those pleasurable feelings for months now, ever since Crystal had shown her how on that camping trip. She expected to one day complete that journey with a boy, but until now she had never experienced the extreme pleasure of an orgasm.
She wondered why, today, she had finally achieved it. It was especially confusing because she hadn't been physically stimulated to it. Something about the situation had pushed her over the edge. Was it the pictures? Was it Jeff?
She giggled at the thought that her mean older brother had done this to her. After all, they had never gotten along. Why should his presence have anything to do with it?
On the other hand, she had to admit that it had felt nice to sit on his lap, especially after she had climaxed and he wrapped his arms around her. His big, strong arms had encircled her, making her feel safe and protected. For a few minutes at least, she had forgotten all about how terrible he was to her. During that time, the only thing she felt toward him was love. Sometimes Jeff could be so sweet. When he had apologized for all the times he teased her, for instance, she had felt his sincerity and his love. She smiled when she thought of that. Despite the fact that he rarely showed it, she had known all her life that he loved her, but for some reason, right now that knowledge made her feel really good inside.
Jeff loves me! she thought with delight.
That still didn't answer the question as to why she had experienced her first orgasm. Perhaps it had to do with the pictures that they had been looking at. She had felt disgusted most of the way through, but she couldn't deny that it had also aroused her. She had incontrovertible proof of that. When she had seen Lissa and Allison together, something had stirred within her. To think that women actually did those things to each other! Perhaps if she had learned about it any other way, it would have been merely revolting, but to know that her stepmother and her very own big sister had engaged in those acts brought it so close to home that she had been nearly overwhelmed by it. And yet, the sheer horror of the idea had a fascinating aspect to it that thrilled her. It was so intense, so strange, so forbidden, that she couldn't tear her eyes away from the screen.
Then came the next pictures, with her father. It was only the second time that she had seen a cock before; she hadn't even seen pictures of one. She didn't know how her daddy's compared to other men's except that it was about the same size as Jeff's, but she found the sight quite erotic, especially when Allison had begun to play with it. She was mature enough to understand that the two of them naturally had sex, but she hadn't expected to actually see it. Then when Allison had begun to suck him, that had taken her to a new level of excitement. It was no wonder that the images of Lissa and her daddy together had had such a profound effect upon her. In just a few minutes, she had learned about lesbians, oral sex, and incest. Those photos had completely changed her entire concept of sex. Not only was there so much variation to it, but her own family was exploring some of the more extreme aspects. To know that Greg and Lissa had acted so contrary to their natures and done these things had been such a shock that she had been unable to wrap her mind around the concept. Everything she had been taught since she was a child had suddenly shattered, leaving her exposed to the depraved world that was just opening to her, and without that knowledge to anchor her, her basest feelings had taken over, pushing her beyond her ability to withstand. That was what had happened to her, she realized.
She also realized that it could have been much worse. If she had discovered those pictures alone, without Jeff there to soften the blow, she might have been tormented by them. She could imagine herself, curled up on her bed crying at the horror. It would have been as if she had been violated, although emotionally rather than physically. All of her beliefs, her ideas of sex, even her concept of right and wrong, would have been violently torn from her. Only Jeff had spared her from that.
Because he loves me! she thought again with a warm internal glow. He had been there for her when she needed him most, and no matter how much they teased each other, she realized that she was glad he had helped her take her first steps into the world of sex. It was just too bad that he couldn't stay with her to the end of that journey, because right now she didn't want to follow that path with anyone else. Unfortunately, that was every bit as bad as what her daddy and Lissa had done, though for some reason it didn't disgust her in the same way.
By now she felt much cleaner, so she turned off the water and stepped out of the shower, reaching for a towel. She felt an urge to stay naked, to just go and lie down on her bed without her clothes on. It seemed a shame to cover herself, but she knew she had to talk to Jeff. There were too many thoughts running through her mind right now, and she knew that only he could help her sort them out.
Jeff was lying on his bed when Brit knocked on the bathroom door. He hadn't heard the shower turn off, but with his thoughts so confused, that was to be expected.
He told her to come in, which she did. She wore only a towel, and her long, golden locks hung down straight and damp from her head. Seeing her like this was nothing unusual; sometimes after she showered she would open the door to his bedroom first before heading into her own bedroom to change. But this seemed different somehow, probably because now he realized that she was a sexual being. She had just proven it a few minutes ago, after all. In truth, she looked downright sexy.
She came and sat on his bed next to him. Without thinking, he put his arm around her waist. Though it was an innocent gesture, it wasn't the type of thing he was used to doing.
Brit didn't seem to mind at all, but leaned in and lay her head down on his shoulder. "I wanted to thank you again," she told him. "I don't suppose many girls are fortunate enough to have their big brother with them the first time they... you know," she giggled.
"Probably not," laughed Jeff, realizing just how absurd the situation was in hindsight.
"You're not going to tell anyone, are you?" she asked.
"What, that you're growing up? It happens to everyone."
"But not like this."
"No, not like this," he agreed. "But don't worry. Even if I wanted to tell somebody, I couldn't without revealing that I saw those pictures. And I don't think that's something I'll ever do."
"Me neither."
"I know. Those were private photos, and we really shouldn't have looked at them."
"Jeff, did it bother you that I... well..."
"Bother me? No, not really. It just means that I know you're not a little girl any more. Maybe I'm just a little sad because you really were the cutest little girl, but now that's all over."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be sorry, Brit. It's all a part of growing up. And in case you're feeling embarrassed that this happened in front of me, don't be. I suppose I should feel awkward about it, but I don't."
"So it doesn't bother you that it happened while I was looking at those pictures of Dad and Lissa?"
"Does it bother you?" he asked.
"Well, no. Not really. I guess it just happened because the whole thing was so overwhelming. I'm just glad you were there to explain things to me."
"Me too. I don't want to think of what would have happened if you had found them on your own."
"It could have really hurt me," Brit agreed.
"Exactly. So are you okay with it now?"
"I don't know. I mean, this is going to change things around here, isn't it?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, now that we saw Daddy and Lissa... doing things. Now that we know about them. Do you think we'll ever be able to look at them again without feeling that there's something wrong about them?"
Jeff sighed. She certainly had a lot of wisdom for a thirteen-year-old. That was something he hadn't really thought about.
"Maybe it will change things," he told her. "But no matter what they've done, they're still our father and sister. Do you love them any less because of this?"
"Well... no. Not really."
"Then maybe we should just let them have their little secret. It's just something they do that really isn't any of our business. Everything else about them is the same, isn't it?"
"I suppose so. Does that mean we should just pretend this never happened?"
"I think if we act like it never happened, we'll find it's not as hard to forget it as we think. Besides, Lissa's gone now, so maybe this is the end of their relationship. I think the best thing to do is to never talk about this ever again, okay?"
Brit nodded. "Okay," she said, then looked up at him. "I was right. You are the best brother in the world."
The storm hit full force just after dark. He hadn't noticed it creeping up on him because he spent most of the evening watching television with Brit. But when the electricity in the air threw static in with the image, he started to notice. He could hear the wind howling outside, as if trying to force its way into the room. Rain pelted the rooftop, and outside the window he could see it overflowing the gutters on the roof and falling in sheets to the ground. Every few seconds, lightning turned the night to day, and the roar of thunder followed immediately, sending vibrations through the floor and rattling the windows.
Jeff did his best to ignore it, concentrating on the TV instead. Brit tried to pretend that it didn't bother her, but he noticed that she kept inching closer to him on the couch, as if just being near him could keep the storm at bay.
An hour later, a sudden flash of lightning knocked out both the lights and the TV. Brit jumped, then tried to laugh it off. In the darkness, Jeff could hear her breathing a little heavier than normal. She had always been a little scared of storms. Usually Lissa would say a few soothing words to her, maybe wrap her arms around her for a few minutes, and then Brit would be just fine. Jeff had never been good with comforting words, so he didn't even try.
"Well, that's it," he said instead. "The power's out. They'll fix it, but probably not until morning."
"Do we have any candles?" Brit asked.
"Sure. They're in the closet. But we might as well not even use them. I think I'm going to go to bed now anyway. It's a little early, but without the power on, there's nothing else to do."
"I might put one in my bedroom anyway," she said.
"Aren't you too old for a night light?" he teased.
"Well, the storm's got me a little nervous. It will just be for tonight."
Jeff reluctantly agreed. As he stood up to head for his room, Brit reached out and took his hand. "Do you mind helping me? I can't see anything."
"I can't either," he said. "I'm as likely to lead you into a wall as up the stairs."
"As long as you run into it first," she laughed.
Jeff let his hand close around hers, noticing that she was trembling. With his other hand outstretched, he began to feel his way through the darkness. Surprisingly, they made it to the closet without any mishaps. There were shelves in there, and he seemed to remember that the candles were on the second shelf from the top. He fumbled around and found one. Fortunately, it was already in a candle holder.
The matches were a different problem. They were in a drawer in the kitchen. Still holding her hand, he led her through the dining room, only stubbing his toe on a chair once. Ironically, the lightning helped. He reoriented himself during the brief flashes, and made it to the drawer with the matches without any further problems. He struck one and lit the candle. After that, they were able to see clearly. He was about to drop her hand, but she squeezed it tightly. "Just till we get up to our rooms," she said. "I'm still a little scared."
He handed her the candle, then led her back out to the great hall and up the stairs to her bedroom.
"Thanks," she said, giving him a hug and then disappearing into her room. He turned and made his way down the hall to his own.
Despite the darkness, it didn't take him any longer to get ready for bed, since he just stripped down to his boxer shorts and left the rest of his clothes, as usual, on the floor. Even with the storm, the leftover heat from the day lingered, so he decided not to wear a shirt. He dropped down on his bed, leaving the covers off, and tried to ignore the lightning and thunder.
The rain didn't bother him. He actually found it soothing. And the thunder didn't scare him; it just made it hard to sleep. Staring up at the ceiling in the dark, he found himself wondering when the storm would die out. As time passed, it didn't lessen at all, but boredom and tiredness started to overcome him, and he began to feel drowsy despite the storm. He was just about to drift off to sleep when he heard a knock at his bedroom door.
"Come in," he said. The door opened, and immediately a soft glow filled the room. Brit placed the candle on the pedestal on top of his dresser and stepped into the room. Apparently, she'd already gotten ready for bed as well. She wore a pair of tiny little cotton panties with designs of pastel-colored unicorns on them, and that "I wear my emotions on my sleeves" shirt that he had bought for her a couple of years ago. She had naturally outgrown it since then, so it was tight enough against her chest that it did nothing to hide her youthful figure, and the outline of her nipples poking through the fabric made it clear that she wasn't wearing a bra. Her breasts weren't particularly big, but her shirt stretched tight against them. It wasn't cut low enough to reveal even the tiniest trace of her developing breasts, but because it was too small for her it was short enough on the bottom that it didn't quite cover her navel, much less her panties. Jeff found himself admiring her smooth, long legs. Overall, it didn't leave much to the imagination. Once again, he realized how much she'd grown up in the last year. She had always been a little shy about her body; he hadn't seen her in her underwear for years now, since before she was old enough for it to bother her. He wondered why she was suddenly willing to let him see her like this, and at the same time, the sight aroused him. He quickly suppressed those feelings. They were perfectly natural, but dangerous.
"I can't sleep," she said. "It's the storm. Can I... can I sleep in your bed tonight, like I used to?"
Once again he remembered how when they were children, she would often sneak into his room at night and sleep in his bed with him. Even though they teased each other constantly, for some reason she felt an attachment to her big brother. After their mother had left them a couple of years ago, Brit had stopped sleeping with him. Maybe she felt she was too old. Maybe in her preteen years she was beginning to assert her independence. Maybe with a new stepmother Brit wanted to be seen as mature and independent. Jeff found himself actually remembering those days with fondness. There was something soothing and relaxing about holding a sleeping child in one's arms.
He looked down at the bed. It was barely big enough for one person, let alone two. But when he looked into his little sister's big blue eyes, he found it difficult to refuse anything she asked him.
"Just for tonight," he offered. Brit grinned, then blew out the candle and quickly climbed into bed with him. She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek, taking him by surprise.
He expected her to lie down on the edge of the bed away from him, but instead she curled up next to him and lay her head on his chest. She draped one of her arms across his body. He could feel the warmth of her cheek on his bare chest, and her thin clothes allowed him to feel every inch of her body pressed up against his. Her breasts were firm, and he could just barely make out the feel of her nipples. As she brushed her legs against his, he noticed that they felt every bit as smooth as they looked.
He wondered if she realized how much she was turning him on. In some ways, she was very innocent. She probably had no idea how sexy she'd become in the last year. In a way, he was glad she was his sister. It meant he would probably have a lot more opportunities to see her like this. But it also meant that it could never go beyond that. For now, he was just content to hold her in his arms as they both slept.
"Jeff?" she suddenly said.
"Yes, Brit?"
"Do you remember, a few years ago, when we first met Allison, how you teased me one day and I went to my room crying?"
"I remember it happening more than once. I told you I was sorry."
"No, I don't mean that. Do you remember what she said she did to cheer me up?"
"Not really."
"She said she told me to think of all the things you did that proved you love me."
"Oh yeah, I remember that. It was probably a short list, which makes me feel bad because I wish I had spent more time making it longer."
"Don't feel bad, Jeff. There were a lot of things on the list. You would be surprised. But do you know what the first thing I said was?"
"I don't know."
"I said that when we were kids you used to let me sleep in your bed sometimes. I don't know if you remember this or not, but I mostly did it after you had been particularly mean to me." So she was thinking the same thing he was. Maybe she missed those days as much as he did.
"I do remember," he said. "I always wondered why. I would have figured those were the times you hated me most."
"It's because of what you always said when I slept in your bed."
"I don't remember, what did I say?"
"You said, 'I love you. Good night.' I know it was just words, and you just said them automatically, but I wanted that reassurance that you still loved me."
His heart went out to her at that moment. She was such a sweet, emotional little girl, so vulnerable sometimes. He had to remember that, because she was so easy to hurt. On the other hand, something as simple as telling her he loved her could brighten up her day.
"You know I'll always love you, Brit," he said. "You're my little sister."
"Thanks," she said. "I just wanted to hear you say it again. Good night."
"I love you. Good night," he whispered.
"Mmm..." hummed Brit, and he could almost feel her smile.
It seemed a shame not to let her get to sleep, but Jeff knew that there was something else he had to ask her, and it might be a long time before he got another chance like this.
"Brit," he said.
"Yes, Jeff?"
"When I said I was sorry about teasing you, what I really meant was... well... do you think after all these years it's too late to start over?"
"Start over?"
"I mean, are we too set in our ways that we can't change? I'm tired of teasing you, because I just end up hurting you, and then I feel bad. And sometimes when you tease me it hurts me too."
"I don't want to hurt you, Jeff."
"And then there are these times, like right now, that I wish we could be like this to each other more often."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, you're not going to believe this, but I actually like to hug you."
"Really?" she giggled.
"I'm serious, Brit. And I like it when you lay your head on my shoulder. I even like it when you sit on my lap, strange as it may seem."
"I like those things too," she replied. "It feels nice."
"But because we tease each other so much we don't get those chances very often, and right now I feel a little sad about so many missed opportunities."
She glanced up at him. "So you think we should stop teasing each other?"
"Not completely," he told her. "Let's just cut it back a little. Okay, a lot. A little teasing can be fun, but we have to be careful that we don't step over the line."
"And what about the other stuff?"
"What stuff?"
"The hugging, and sitting on your lap and stuff."
"We can do that as much as we want."
Brit smiled. "Okay, I'm going to take you up on that offer, starting now." She managed to get an arm around his neck and hugged him tightly. He put his arms lovingly around her and hugged her back. It felt so nice that neither of them wanted to let go, and in that position they drifted off to sleep.
When the first rays of dawn streamed through his window in the morning, he woke to find her almost completely on top of him. Her head lay just below his chin, so he could feel her breath on his neck. Her shirt had ridden up so that it barely covered her breasts, and her bare stomach was pressed against his. Her crotch rested against his thigh, and he could feel her mound under her panties.
He went to nudge her awake, and put his hand on her waist. For a moment, he lost control and began to caress her. Then she stirred, and he immediately pulled his hand away, pretending to be asleep.
She lifted her head off of his chest. "Jeff," she whispered, and he slowly opened his eyes. Gazing up at her soft face, he began to realize why their dad called her his angel. Her hair tumbled over one side of her head, draping down to tickle his chest. The sweet, innocent smile on her pouty little lips and her large, lovely blue eyes made her seem more a fairy creature than a real person.
"Thanks for letting me sleep with you," she said. "I love you." She gave him a kiss, this time on the lips, then rolled off of him and skipped into the bathroom to take a shower.
"I love you too," he whispered.
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.