"Far better it is, to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, 
even though checkered by failure, than to rank with those poor spirits who 
neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in that great twilight that 
knows neither victory or defeat."

-Teddy Roosevelt


**********


My mind drifted peacefully as I lay stretched out on the bed in a 
very relaxed posture, or as relaxed a posture one can obtain on 
one single size bed. I then opened my eyes and looked up at Dale 
with a smile. This is the way it should be, all the time, feeling 
totally at ease and content with someone. I was trying to be a 
better Girlfriend by giving Dale more attention and such. I slowly 
turned onto my left side and he on his right as our arms and legs 
intertwined with one another, I watched as his fingers began to 
stroke first my hair, then cheeks, then down to my arms, paying 
me compliments as he went. I then noticed that his eyes had 
stopped their roaming and fixated on my chest. I blushed as his 
hands roamed between the tight space of our bodies and then 
began to trace the outline of my bra, it was very obvious that I was 
responding favorably to his touches.

His thumb grazed over the top of my nipple and remained there, 
teasing it over my shirt, "Yeah, that feels nice." I groaned. My 
thighs shifted and pressed against his legs as our bodies softly 
crushed against one another, we each planted soft kisses on each 
other's cheeks and lips. Dale leaned in kissing me on the lips 
wanting more intensity, a kiss that I eagerly returned as our 
mouths opened to allow our tongues to intertwine with one 
another and it was at that moment I felt his erection rub against 
my thigh and I squirmed a little bit, my right hand moved down 
and gently squeezed his crotch. Did I mention Dale is 'well hung'? 
I mean big! huge! Alarmingly so. 

Dale's well endowed 'male anatomy' caused the Angel in me to 
immediately express her displeasure, 'Is this the reward for being a 
good girl Lord!? (shaking her fist toward the Heavens) I always 
make good grades, was home on time and saved myself for 
marriage! Only to have 'pain' written all over our wedding night!' 
The Angel had a point, Dale's penis had 'ouch' written all over it. 
Aside from that major distraction, our making-out was getting 
more and more intense as the weeks went by and that comforted 
me a lot, I wanted that, I desired that in a man, a strong sexual 
and physical attraction that is basic and physical. Needless to say 
it was getting harder and harder slow things down during our 
more heavy make-out sessions. 

As Dale was getting ready to go back to his apartment I got up to 
lift the window, I really enjoy the fresh air from outside and the 
sound of nature fluttering in thru the screen. 

I'm not used to this feeling of calm and peace, but I sure hope it 
lasts.


**********


The thing about life is this, you get over one hurdle and then you 
are suddenly confronted by another, but I wouldn't call what 
happened next a hurdle at all, it was more like 'life-altering'. 

What was I saying earlier about calm and peace?

Well I walked into the girl's locker room to officially practice with 
the entire soccer squad, I had major butterflies and scanned the 
room to pick out anyone I had not met, only a couple of faces 
seemed unfamiliar. My eyes kept scanning from right to left.

Now let's pause for a moment....you people....you 
readers....whatever you want to call yourselves can now mock 
and laugh all you want at this next statement but when my vision 
locked on to the last person to my left, that is when I saw....

....her! 

She looked up at me, our eyes became fixated, and I got this jolt, 
like being startled. I finally remembered to smile and for the first 
time in my life I was looking at another person and thinking 'Oh 
my god, she's beautiful, I must meet her.' I've never had that 
feeling about anyone, not even Dale! My insides got warm and I 
was suddenly nervous as I walked in her general direction as if my 
body was being guided under its own power.

"This locker is free." Her voice was so soft as it called out to me as 
her beautiful fingers pointed to the one right next to hers. I 
couldn't have said 'no' if I wanted to, there was this power of 
suggestion that the girl had over me that I was unable to resist.

"Okay." I said and stepped over the bench, resting my gym bag on 
the floor.

"I'm Nikki." 

"I'm Corbin." I gushed like some fool girl gone ga-ga and I 
abruptly shook her hand. But I notice she's not so smooth and 
calm anymore, she was at first, but now she's tilting her head 
down and away and her cheeks become a tad blushed. We're both 
acting a bit goofy, trying to break the ice with one another.

"I heard a new girl was joining the team, you must be her." Nikki 
said.

"I am her."

"I hear you're pretty good." Nikki says and closes her locker.

I am struggling to concentrate on what she is saying, her hair is so 
black, and pupils are so dark and exotic, I am getting lost in them. 
She is definitely foreign, maybe Spanish or Brazilian? Oh good 
grief it's like I look at this girl and I hear angels singing and music 
playing and all sorts of romantic thoughts are tumbling from my 
brain into every part of my body. This is madness!

"Thanks, that's nice of you to say." I finally respond to her kind 
comment, yet my primary focus is studying this exotic beauty, 
with her dark olive complexion, skin so smooth, and her body was 
so toned and athletic. Again those eyes, those big dark eyes, like 
two black opals that were calm yet so direct that I felt like I didn't 
have a private thought around her. We were instant friends, we 
both wanted to be around one another and seemed to gravitate to 
one another, it was awkward at first, we both felt the same 
attraction but played it off as a soul mates from some prior life.

Nikki was also smart and was one of the first girls who didn't seem 
to judge me at all. She wasn't into weight lifting that much (could 
have fooled me with her toned body) but was 'Sporty' as Nikki 
liked to call herself.

I had started to enjoy Nikki's company immensely, she also had a 
sense of responsibility to her academic studies like I did. We 
complimented each other in ways Sharon and I never were able 
to. Nikki and I would just sometimes glance over at one another 
and smile, for no reason at all, it felt...well...simply beautiful.

Nikki had a serious boyfriend all right, she and Rob had dated for 
over a year now. I wanted to hate him but he turned out to be such 
a decent, nice guy that I couldn't help but like him. She also did 
some modeling on the side, but never talked about it much, most 
guys and girls thought Nikki's looks and body should not be 
getting banged, scratched and bruised in sports. But Nikki was 
truly an athlete; she was tall, strong, and fast! I think faster then 
any other girl on the team so she could really move the ball down 
the field.


**********


Meeting Dale, and then Nikki, lurched my life in a very 
unexpected but welcome new direction. 

In fact I felt as though my entire life up until now was unable to 
compare with the emotional growth and changes I was going thru 
now. Physically I felt like I was pushing the boundaries of 
acceptable behavior by being so affectionate with Nikki, and vice 
versa. Nikki's affection was intense, purposeful, even dangerous, 
while on the other hand, my friendship with other girl's like 
Sharon didn't have any of that intensity. 

But Dale was my serious boyfriend, so why would God introduce 
Nikki? I do not say the word 'God' lightly, I am very religious, 
and take references to God very serious. 'Okay this is just another 
challenge Corbin, stay focused and tend to your relationship with 
Dale.' I told myself, those other distractions you just have to 
deflect and ignore, 'Do not be led down the road of temptation!'

One new experience that I had never anticipated, the most 
stressful yet, occurred when I made the short trip over to Dale's 
apartment after Soccer practice one day. I had shown up at a pre-
arranged time, although Dale's car was nowhere in the parking lot, 
but I went up to the apartment anyway. Steve was there, his 
roommate, and answered the door inviting me in, now I didn't 
know Steve all that well, but he seemed like a decent enough guy. 
Steve stood about 5'10" with un-kept red hair, but otherwise a 
fairly tidy person like Dale, 'Thank god' I thought as I could be 
such a stickler for neatness.
 
"You just get off from practice?" Steve asked eyeing my soccer 
uniform, actually I watched his eyes continue to trail down 
towards my legs and back up, checking me out as he does 
frequently.
 
"Yep." I said and sat down at the Kitchen table while Steve went 
back into the living room to watch TV.

"Dale running late?" I asked while checking my cell phone to see 
if there were any messages.
 
"Just a little he should be home any second." Steve looked over at 
me again and then cut off the TV. "You can fix yourself something 
to eat or drink if you like, just help yourself." now his full attention 
was directed towards me.
 
"Thanks." But I just kept picking at a piece of tattered string 
coming off my shorts. I knew Steve had a hard time figuring me 
out because of my typical one-word answers. I guess to him he 
might as well be talking to a brick wall. I looked up from picking 
at my dirty shorts and saw him walking towards the kitchen table, 
it caught me a little off guard but didn't give me any grave 
concerns at the moment. I really didn't have any bad vibes from 
being around Steve. Most girls I know would never show up at a 
boyfriends house filthy dirty, but that was me, I didn't care and 
Dale didn't mind at all. He said he thought I looked even more 
sexy all covered in sweat and dirt. But I do shower and clean up 
very well people, just so you know, I'm not like pig-pen from 
Charlie Brown for crying out loud!
 
"You weight lift?" Steve pulled out a chair to my left and sat down 
at the table. 

'Oh great....' I thought, '....is he going to grill me now?'
 
"Some." I answered and was trying to change mental gears into 
my 'Social Mode', if that is what he was expecting.
 
"How much can you lift and such?" He leaned forward, folding his 
arms casually in front of him on the table top.
 
"Oh I don't really keep track of that sort of stuff, I just try and stay 
in shape." I smiled and tried to brush off the pursuit of any more 
questions about that topic of conversation. Steve watched my 
every movement, even under the smudges of sweat and dirt he 
seemed fascinated with me.
 
"Oh come on, you don't keep track?" He scoffed at the thought.
 
I shifted in the seat a little and let out a small, indistinguishable 
sigh of annoyance, "Not really, I keep track of everything up 
here." and pointed to my forehead with a smile.
 
"So, how serious are you with Dale?" Steve suddenly shifted 
questions again, catching me off guard a bit.
 
"What?" My mouth opened with puzzlement. I understood the 
question, but was a little surprised he was being so forward.
 
"You know what I mean, I notice you've been coming over a lot 
more, so I figure that you two must be getting pretty serious." He 
smiled and seemed amused that I was stumbling over my words.
 
"Well we are dating, and are committed to dating one another 
exclusively."

"So no doubts about that? No opportunity for something else?" He 
raised his eyebrows and totally shocked me as his right hand 
reached out, the palm of his hand coming to rest on my left knee 
that was folded over my right leg. 

My eyes grew wide as I looked down at Steve's hand. Instinctively 
my left hand which had been folded in my lap flew out and 
backhanded his right forearm knocking his hand from my knee 
with a loud 'smack'.
 
"What the hell are you doing?!" My eyebrows fused together in 
anger and disgust.
 
"I just wanted to let you know that if things didn't work out with 
Dale it would be cool if you and I could hook up, that's all." He 
shrugged and tried to act nonchalant about the whole thing.
 
"Are you morally retarded!?" I fired right back.
 
"What?" He looked at my befuddled.
 
"For you to hit on me, in your friend's apartment!" I started to 
seethe.
 
"Hey chill out, it's not that big a deal." He leaned back in his chair 
acting a little like the one who had been insulted.
 
"Sneaking around behind people's back and putting out dating 
requests in case things don't work out with your friend is pathetic." 
I snapped.
 
"You think so?" He leered at me with contempt over my flying 
insults and high-brow moral stance.
 
"If you think it's no big deal then why not get it out in the open, 
let's just get everyone together when Dale gets home so we all can 
know what everyones game plan is. That way you and Dale can 
sync-up and you can outline your dating strategy." I was now 
leaning onto the table with my right elbow.
 
"Look, you're blowing this way out of proportion!" He interrupted 
while shaking his head and stood up.
 
"Where are you going?" and I quickly came to my feet. I wasn't 
sure what just happened inside of my brain, but something flipped 
and I wasn't going to let this guy or anyone off so easy.

"What?" He looked at my strangely, his upper lip curling with 
humorous shock, "I'm going back to watch TV."
 
"You want to watch TV? How are you going to do that with me in 
your way? You have to get thru me little boy unless you 
apologize." I took a step back and tore off my lightweight jacket in 
haste. I was beyond caring at this point and I was hedging my bets 
that he would back down first.
 
"Are you serious? Are you threatening me? I'm not fighting you!" 
He said with a little shock and nervousness creeping into his voice. 
Steve was totally blown away by how I was reacting, I guess he 
never had any girl threaten him like this, what made it even worse 
was how he appeared to be second guessing himself.
 
"Your not fighting? Fine, then I'll be the one throwing all the 
punches." I shrugged and shook my arms out, my muscles flexing 
and tensing as I rolled first my left, then right shoulder. 
 
"Have you lost your mind! I'm not fighting you, you're in my 
place, now leave!" Steve pointed to the door. 
 
I stepped in and put my hands on my hips and smiled "Make me 
leave! And another thing, as a guest in your house you are one hell 
of a rude host to be hitting on your guest!" Pointing a finger at 
myself, "And did I give you permission to touch me!" I took 
another step in closer, "DID I?" I loudly snapped.
 
"No." He said with a mumbling noise barely above that of a 
whisper, his eyes conveyed true shock. I'm sure he had seen a few 
girls sloppily smack it out in a parking lot or bar while intoxicated, 
but I was looking him dead in the eye and seemed as collect and 
serious as anyone.
 
"But you did touch me, didn't you!" I snapped again.
 
"I'm sorry, look I was just trying to hit on you!" He shrugged a 
couple of times.
 
"You're sorry? That's your idea of hitting on a girl? No wonder 
your single!" I placed my hands back on my hips and cocked my 
head to the left in disgust.
 
"I'm sorry okay! Jesus! What else do you want!" He sighed. I just 
kept staring at him and shook my head in disgust and reached 
over to pick up my jacket.
 
"I'm going to wait for Dale in his room." I growled and turned to 
walk down the hall.
 
"What are you going to tell him?" Steve called out.
 
"We'll see." I called out, not looking back.
 
"But I apologized!" He yelled, but I just slammed the door shut.
 
I threw my coat into a corner chair and flopped back onto the bed, 
I began to massage my temples with both hands, trying to ease the 
stress out of my body as I felt my heart pounding in my chest. As 
the seconds ticked by and I increased my breathing I could literally 
feel my heart slow down to a more regular pace, it was an 
invigorating sensation, the feeling of my own heart beating in my 
chest. 'What the fuck' I thought, 'This is definitely not High 
School...its worse.'
 
I laid there waiting for Dale, he wasn't running late, but I was 
getting impatient. I needed a shower badly and was concerned 
that I was funking up his bed, but not concerned enough to get up 
from my horizontal position. I then slowly started to doze off 
when he came bounding into the room, big smile on his gorgeous 
face. Odd how that always happens, you start to doze off into a 
nice sleep only to be interrupted!

Springing up from the bed I patted him on the shoulder but he 
didn't let slip past him, he grabbed me in a bear hug and squeezed 
kissing me on the cheek. I had a big smile on my face, but my 
OCD was kicking in about getting cleaned up. I kissed him on the 
cheek and whispered, "Gotta take a shower." 

"You smell nice, I don't mind." He kept on hugging me and 
moved toward the bed. I knew where this was going, but I was not 
in the mood for that, just a shower!

"Thank you, but I prefer to freshen up." My God, I have totally 
flipped into girly-girly mode since starting Dale. I really have 
become focused on primping, plucking, shaving, and being as 
beautiful and nice smelling as I can for him. Why is that? Very 
confusing. 

**********


'Just stay focused on Dale, studying, and sports.' Must repeat that 
over, and over, and the rest will fall into place. Sounds simple 
enough, but maybe I didn't want life to be simple. Maybe I really 
wanted things complicated, and complicated is what I got the very 
next night when I slept over at Nikki's apartment.

I just lay there, my eyelids growing heavy as I sighed with an odd 
'down' feeling. But a minute later my head sprung up off the 
pillow as I felt someone's weight on the mattress and watched 
Nikki's long dark form crawl over to the right side of the bed. 
"This is much more comfortable than the couch." Nikki 
whispered jokingly and we both smiled as I pulled the cover over 
the both of us.
 
"Nice to have another warm body nearby." I sighed but kept my 
eyes shut as I remained turned away from my friend. My heart felt 
like it was beating in an irregular manner. I in fact could feel Nikki 
close, so very close. I just about had a heart attack, but remained 
still, at the unexpected touch of Nikki's hand now resting on my 
waist. My hand moved from its tucked position and found that of 
my friends, slowly our fingers intertwined. I closed my eyes and 
took a deep breath as I scooted back closer to Nikki, neither of us 
spoke a word as our bodies adjusted and snuggled against one 
another. It seemed all very innocent, both of us finding physical 
comfort in the other's arms. It was a kind of a reassurance, a 
special bond of sorts as we held one another in silence, but yet the 
silence remained as if we both knew how fragile the moment was. 
Nikki curled her right forearm across my tummy and pulled me in 
closer.

Somewhere between consciousness and sleep I felt Nikki's head 
turn and her warm mouth press against the back of my head, she 
sounded sleepy when she said the words, and I still wonder if I 
was truly awake when she uttered "I think your beautiful."

"Thank you Nikki." I whispered back.

"Your welcome love." Nikki softly said, I think we were both 
dead asleep shortly after that. That was the first time that I can 
remember contemplating what it might be like to have a 
'girlfriend', as in 'dating' another girl.

Yes, I do want things complicated in my life, or at least that little 
devil in my mind likes it that way. 


**********


Winter break couldn't come fast enough, I looked forward to 
spending time with my family, and only my family.  

But did that happen? No and in some ways thank God it did not.
 
"What the hell!" I took my foot off the gas as I let my car roll 
down the street towards my house. I caught my breath, trying to 
be sure as I stared at what I thought was Nikki's car sitting in my 
driveway. It was easily a two hour drive for Nikki and I was not at 
all expecting her. But that didn't stop me from practically busting 
thru the front door, my eyes quickly scanning every inch of the 
foyer, before finding Nikki sitting in the kitchen talking to my 
mom.
 
I barely stepped foot into my room when I invited Nikki to stay 
the night, "Nikki you have to stay over, you drove all this way, I 
don't want you driving back tonight." I unzipped my warm up 
jacket, revealing a grey tee shirt drenched in sweat.
 
"Oh I don't want to impose." Nikki sighed and walked around my 
room, slowly taking everything in.
 
"Well, I'm still blown away, what brings you all the way out here." 
I stood, hands on hips, watching Nikki pause in her surveying of 
the room. 

Slowly she looked to her left, "I just wanted to see you." Nikki 
smiled and shrugged, her right finger ran along the edge of the 
dresser.
 
"That' it?" I questioned with a perplexing shrug.
 
"Isn't that enough?" Nikki whispered as she barely looked back 
over, and if I wasn't mistaken a hint of blush filled Nikki's cheeks.
 
"Well it's enough for me." I sighed and sat on the edge of my bed 
to untie my shoelaces. "Well, if you can hold on, I'll jump in the 
shower and then talk to my mom about you staying over, I mean 
it's really a done deal I just need to tell my mom and dad."
 
I walked back into the room in a pair of jeans, sandals and a loose 
white sweater. She watched me as I vigorously rubbed a towel 
over my wet hair.
 
"I feel overdressed." Nikki sighed and stood up as we went back 
down stairs, looking down at her knee length wool skirt, dark grey 
with a silver button down blouse.
 
"Never, you look wonderful." I glowed and took her hand, leading 
her downstairs. It was a wonderful evening, we sat and talked 
about so many things.


**********


I reached up into my closet and pulled out a sleeping bag, 
"Tonight, you sleep in my bed!"

"Corbin please!" Nikki began to protest, but I wasn't listening to 
her and kept unrolling the sleeping bag.
 
"It's no use protesting." I said as I unzipped the side of the fluffy 
sleeper. 
 
"Okay." Nikki mumbled to herself and got ready for bed. I didn't 
know why I had become so giddy and excited about Nikki's visit, 
it was only about a week ago I was stressed out about how close 
we were getting physically, but it just felt too damn good right 
now to worry about any of that. 

I was pretty sure Nikki was still awake later that night, I couldn't 
see her face from where I was laying down on the floor so I wasn't 
sure.
 
"Nik?" I whispered.
 
"What's up?" 

"So, like, what's on your mind? I mean you've been sort of quiet 
since you got here, everything okay with you and Rob?"
 
"Yeah, we're still seeing each other." Nikki said in a somewhat 
monotone voice. 

I couldn't take the suspense it was killing me and I sat up quickly 
enough that it almost seemed to cause Nikki to jump a little bit, 
"You can tell me, what's on your mind?" I tried to keep my voice 
the faintest of whispers. My eyes had adjusted enough to see that 
Nikki's hand was now peeking out from underneath the covers, 
her index finger motioning for me to come closer. Yet Nikki still 
didn't say a word and the long shadows kept me from seeing my 
friend's expression.
 
"What?" I nervously smiled and sat up some more, but Nikki kept 
slowly beckoning with a hand gesture, wanting me to come closer. 
I slid my legs out from under the sleeping bag and crawled 
hesitantly to the edge of the bed.
 
"I want you to come over here." Nikki said in her own soft, low 
voice, but it included a slight sarcastic tone as if I would only find 
out when I got closer.
 
Now my heart was pounding, I was nervous about whatever Nikki 
was calling me closer for, and prayed that she wasn't about to 
reveal some horrible news. But I couldn't help it and my face got 
evidently tense with concern, "Nikki, you're making me very 
nervous, what's wrong?" I pleaded propping my elbows on the 
edge of my bed.
 
"Sorry." Nikki smiled, "I'm not trying to make you nervous, I'm 
just being silly that's all."
 
"Silly?" I smiled with a nervous chuckle, "That's okay."
 
"I just didn't want to keep whispering back and forth, better if we 
talk closer I think." Nikki said and hesitated again, "I would like it 
if you would just lay here for a minute."
 
"Only if you promise to tell me what's bothering you." I smiled 
devilishly and watched as Nikki raised her right arm, the heavy 
blanket seemed to float in the air and hold position. I crawled up 
under the blanket and adjusted myself but it was rather difficult in 
that it was a single bed and the full length of my body brushed up 
against Nikki's. The only thing that was slightly alarming was the 
way our bare legs touched from the top of our thighs down to our 
toes. It felt good actually, both of our legs were smooth and 
shaven and more importantly very warm. My eyes blinked and 
adjusted to the close proximity of Nikki's face, so close I could 
even feel my friend's breath on my face, yet there was a comfort in 
the closeness and a sense of security.

"Okay, what's up?" I said with a smile of anticipation.
 
"Close your eyes."

My eyelids narrowed suspiciously but I slowly narrowed them 
until they were indeed shut, but it was so damn dark that it was 
almost not necessary. "What are you up too?" I sighed as I felt 
Nikki's right hand move under the covers, closer to my head and it 
wasn't long before I felt a fingertip lightly graze my chin.
 
"Shhhh, and hold still." the tone in her voice was now serious. I 
smiled a little more but more so out of anxiety as a warm palm 
came to rest on my left cheek. The touch was soothing and 
comforting, but what happened next made my entire body tense, 
my lips felt something warm and very soft as a tingle shot down 
my spine igniting a warmth in the pit of my stomach that grew, 
spreading out over my entire body. Needless to say my eyes did 
not stay closed but fluttered quickly open as my head jerked back 
an inch, but not necessarily in any specific direction. The lingering 
touch was now gone and only Nikki's smiling face was looking at 
my perplexed and somewhat shocked expression.
 
"What did you do?" I gasped.
 
"Please don't be mad at me." Nikki tried to maintain a smile as she 
looked for sympathy.
 
"No, not mad, just wondering." I could barely bring myself to say 
what I suddenly realized had just happened and my heart was now 
hammering violently in my chest.
 
"I'm sorry, I should have asked your permission first, but I wanted 
to feel...." and Nikki took a deep breath, a breath that was done to 
keep her composure because she appeared to become a bit 
emotional. "....what it was like to kiss you!" She blurted that out 
like it was physically painful to speak.
 
When those words came from my friend's mouth I just about 
fainted, my chest swelled as I began to breathe harder. Another 
girl had just kissed me on the lips, although it was more of light 
peck then a real kiss. "Why?" I croaked out nervously, 'Stop 
playing dumb!' the back of my mind scolded me, this was 
something I had thought about for weeks and now it had finally 
happened.
 
"I don't go around doing this, you must believe me, you're the first 
and only girl I've ever had such a strong urge to kiss." Nikki was 
blushing now, I could feel the warmth of it in her cheeks as my left 
hand came up to brush her along the side of her face so she would 
know I was not mad. I was more concerned about the new 
trembling in my legs and arms.
 
"I'm just scared that's all." I sighed with the briefest smile.
 
"I'm scared too." Nikki's voice trembled and we locked eyes for 
several seconds, no smiles, no distractions, it felt like an inferno 
under the blanket and there was no mistaking the pounding of our 
hearts, sometimes in unison it seemed. Once again it was an 
unspoken look between us, finally our eyes had adjusted enough 
to see each other's expressions. 

"That was more then a kiss." I said almost choking on the words 
as my emotions were getting the best of me.

Nikki smiled a little, "I know." She whispered and how I wanted 
to cry, laugh, and rejoice all at the same time at what we were 
experiencing. I watched Nikki tilt her head and my eyes narrowed 
in response, I placed my tongue between my lips to wet them, they 
felt so dry. Nikki's right hand found and began to stroke my left 
forearm ever so gently as my left hand stroked thru the black 
strands of her hair that seemed to flow like a dark river from 
Nikki's beautiful head. We exchanged sleepy glances as we 
nervously allowed fingers to explore one another's hair, cheeks 
and arms. We rubbed noses, and our lips touched again and again, 
we seemed to be teasing each other, touching our lips so lightly as 
if they were so very fragile.

Into my mouth Nikki whispered "Your so kind and innocent 
Corbin, and my dearest friend." She paused as her right thumb 
gently caressed the outline of my lower lip and chin. I started to 
see the 'old Nikki' coming thru, that incredible sultry, sexy 
confidence that first drew the two of us together. "I don't 
physically connect with just anyone, and never..." Nikki's eyes 
suddenly looked up and found me staring back, "...never with 
another woman." Nikki studied me and realized I was hanging on 
her every word now, or maybe even her every action.  "Your lips 
are so soft, they feel just like mine."

We started to kiss for real now, I never imagined a kiss like this, 
my whole body suddenly was on fire and awake. Just a few 
minutes ago I was on the verge of sleep, now I was awake, alive 
and found myself almost crying when my body responded to the 
way Nikki kissed me. I found Nikki's tongue to be soft, sensual 
and highly erotic as it mingled with my own. I felt my personal 
and private area contract and a dampness fill my vagina, so much 
that there was an unmistakable wetness. I must be doing this right 
as I felt a moan slip past Nikki's mouth and into my own. Nikki's 
tongue was now exploring my mouth at will, I was amazed how 
aggressive she was being! 

"My god your so damn sexy and beautiful Corbin." Nikki moaned 
and pulled me closer, all I could do was to respond with more 
kissing, it was so sensual how our tongues would explore and 
intertwine with one another, mostly in a slow lazy manner. We 
were now clutching one another under the covers, so anxiety filled 
that our fists gripped and pulled our shirts, almost to the point of 
ripping. I felt Nikki pull, forcing me closer against her body. 

"Oh Nik," I grunted, things started to speed up even more, she 
moved her tongue and lips down over my chin and neck, nibbling 
and licking at my sweat coated skin, "This is overwhelming." I 
groaned and rolled onto my back and writhed under covers, trying 
to understand what was happening. It was amazing, Nikki 
climbed on top of my body, like some predator, snuggling her 
body tightly against me as we held and embraced one another, our 
leg's intertwining with each other and we softly kissed each other's 
neck. We let our inhibitions go, our crotches pressed against one 
another and we both humped each other feverishly, our arched 
backs aching for greater contact and then our eyes met. I have 
never been so vulnerable and loving with anyone, tears began to 
stream out of both our eyes.  The friction of our panties was 
adding to the already tremendous amount of heat between our 
legs, I was on the verge of coming, my right hand reached down 
and grabbed a hold of my girlfriend's beautiful, firm ass. Nikki 
shuddered and I could feel her muscles contracting, her ass was 
now rock hard as she humped me back, her mouth opened and her 
body began to squirm on top of me, my god she was coming, she 
was coming from rubbing against me!

It was my turn and I wasn't far behind, I arched up and then I was 
grinding like some possessed woman. Nikki's free hands were 
squeezing and arousing my breasts, first over and then under my 
nightshirt as I shuddered thru my erotic spell. 

We paused in the moment, each apparently reflecting on the many 
lines we had just crossed. I suddenly realized how drenched in 
sweat we were, legs and arms slick from what felt like an amazing 
workout. Nikki sighed and I stroked my hands down her back 
until my the palms of my hands rested on her two round butt 
cheeks, she flexed them a little in response and smiled. "I love 
touching your body, how you smell, everything about you, you're 
the sexiest girl I know." I felt a little embarrassed at saying this to 
another girl, but I meant it, they did not feel like just words.

Nikki smiled, and leaned in to give me a strong embrace as we lay 
silently amongst the dark shadows of my room, eventually we 
rolled to the side, me on my right, Nik on her left as we looked at 
one another and she whispered, "Thank you, it makes me feel 
good to hear that." and suddenly I didn't feel silly anymore. There 
was never one of those uneasy moments between us, I thought 
there might be, you know where we both break out in giggles over 
the whole incident. From the moment we first met we both had a 
mutual desire for one another, the instant friends thing, life long 
friends, and now it felt like we were on our way to becoming 
lovers. 
 
At first I thought we were both falling asleep as we lay face to 
face, silly me. It all started with a slight shifting of our bodies, 
Nikki rubbing her bare thigh against mine, my left arm wrapping 
around her back so our naked bellies were pressed tight. Tenderly 
at first, ever so lightly our lips touched over and over again, until 
once more my bedroom was filled with the sounds of us kissing 
deep and long, panting and moaning. I felt Nikki's hand at the 
base of my back, then her fingers had a firm hold on my panties, I 
gasped a little because it actually felt damn erotic as the fabric 
pulled tight across my crotch. My fingers were doing their own 
caressing and I smiled a little during our kissing.

"You make me very, very wet, more then any one ever has." 
Nikki moaned into my open mouth.

For all of my big talk about love, friendship and so on, Nikki and I 
also had a sexually raw, primitive attraction for one another. 


**********


I blinked my eyes, no longer able to keep the morning sun from 
interrupting. The covers were discarded during the night as we 
both lay on my bed, our bodies still slightly entangled although we 
had both shifted some. But we still clung to one another, arms 
over and under, our shirts pushed up revealing a lot of skin. I 
leaned up and saw my bare left leg draped over Nikki's right, our 
actions from last night suddenly came flooding back and I glanced 
over at my door as a thought of my mom walking in to the sight of 
her daughter and girlfriend embracing each other in the bed. I 
almost panicked at the thought but resisted springing from bed like 
a maniac, especially when Nikki stirred next to me. Within the 
silence we looked at one another and an emotional tenderness 
seemed to sweep over us, our hands began to stroke each other's 
faces with affection. I tried to say something, but ended up with a 
lump in my throat, the tears started down my cheeks as I let out a 
few sobs. Nikki pulled my head over onto her right shoulder and 
firmly held me, letting me rest my head for a few minutes. When I 
pulled away, Nikki was also crying a little.

"I don't know why I suddenly got so upset." I smiled as Nikki 
brushed the tears from my eyes.
 
Nikki just gave me this wonderful smile and then said, "It's hard 
sometimes, to admit how we feel about something. Sometimes it's 
even harder to put it into words." Nikki gently stroked my hair.

"GIRLS!" My mom yelled from the downstairs kitchen causing us 
to scramble apart, gasping. Nikki running for the door and down 
the hall to the bathroom as I lunged for a brush on my nightstand, 
quickly pulling it thru my hair.
 
"What's up mom?" I nervously yelled back.
 
"Breakfast is almost ready!"
 
"Okay!" I said back and set the brush down on the dresser. "Get a 
grip." I thought to myself.


**********
 

"Okay, I'll see you at School." Nikki smiled as I walked her to the 
car.
 
"Drive safe, okay?" I sighed and gripped Nikki's hand.
 
"Will do." Nikki replied returning my grip.
 
"Look Nik, I don't know what to make of all of this, I mean, I 
don't think." I stammered a bit as Nikki climbed into the Driver's 
seat. I knelt down next to the door as Nikki rolled her window 
down.
 
"I understand Corbin, I don't want to over analyze this either. 
We're good friends and well, I don't know, there's a spark between 
us I guess." Both of us blushed and I had to look away at the 
reference to that physical connection.
 
"I like that word 'spark'." I said and sheepishly looked up at Nikki 
and we stared for a second, studying each other's expressions. I 
glanced around, looking back at my house and then at the 
neighbors. Nikki picked up on what I was scoping out for making 
sure they we were alone and my heart began to throb in my chest, 
hoping. I couldn't believe it, I was now taking the initiative! ME! 
The shy one! And I leaned in the window and Nikki smiled as our 
lips met, the kiss was brief but satisfying as we moved our lips 
gently over one another exhaling sighs of pleasure that the touch 
brought. Our tongues came out for a brief touch as we both 
smiled. I pulled away and smiled, "That was nice." I no longer 
cared that Nikki was a girl, because it was all too perfect, the 
contour of our lips seemed to mold perfectly against one another 
and our mouths complimented each other in ways that could only 
be described as natural.
 
"Very nice." Nikki glanced up with that sultry look.
 
"It'll be hard to focus on school and boyfriends when we get back." 
I sighed, stuffing my hands into my jean pockets as I backed away 
from the car.
 
Nikki shook her head in agreement, "Very hard, but we'll be 
okay."
 
I stood still, and for a moment never felt the chilly wind that was 
blowing into my face as I watched Nikki's car pull away. As I 
turned with a wave my heart sank with the realization that life was 
never going to be simple again.

"Damn." I mumbled to myself as I shut the front door, shaking off 
the cold, "How did things get so confusing so fast?"


**********


"God have mercy on the man who doubts what he's sure of." 

-Bruce Springsteen 


**********