Chapter 10


**********


The longest journey 
Is the journey inwards.

-Dag Hammarskj”ld


**********


I'm listening to the Rolling Stones as I type this, not their new 
stuff, their classical stuff.
 
Speaking of music I like almost all types of music, but it has to 
have a good beat to it. Except Country 'riding-on-the-range, 
cow-shit-kicking' Cowboy bullshit crap. I mean really now! All 
those Country Music songs sound the same. Guys and Girls 
singing about what? I'll tell you what! Their woman left them, 
their horse has gone lame, and their dog died.
 
WHAA! WHAA! WHAA! Cry me a river. 

So now that I have gotten all of the angst out of my system, we 
may begin....


**********

"You'd be my Girlfriend if Dale hadn't gotten to you first!" 

Oh Goodie, here we go again.

His name was Shelton and his reputation preceded him. A very 
handsome black man who was a real charmer with the ladies. 
He was a Football player and a lady 'player'. He leaned in and 
rubbed shoulders playfully with mine. He meant it by the way, 
Shelton had a major fixation/crush/boner for me, but he also 
knew how to play everything off as just innocent flirting so I 
wouldn't get too offended. 

You have to be very well in tune with what the other person's 
body language is conveying in order to pull off such flirting. 

I was fading in and out of the conversation with Shelton. I had 
started to lean away from him as he would lean in, something 
he seemed to pick up on. The other thing to mention is that 
Shelton had that well developed ability to initiate conversation 
with anyone he chose, he could be lighthearted and funny, 
without coming off as arrogant.

"Look," I sighed and looked up at his attentive dark eyes. "If you 
want to stand here and have a pleasant conversation, we can 
do that. But that's all." My expression became just a tad bit 
tense, hoping to drive home the point.
 
"I totally respect that, but please you're totally not my type." He 
smirked and took a sip of his beer.

I just nodded and smiled at his little word games, "I understand, 
you're just bored with everyone else in the bar and would rather 
stand here with me, just to kill time, right?"
  
"Maybe, or maybe the alcohol is really getting to my brain, 
impairs ones judgment you know." He said leaning in close 
again, his voice low, forcing me to lean in and hear him. 
Another nice trick and I have to admit. The little bantering going 
on was kind of amusing now, just don't let your boyfriend or 
girlfriend overhear you doing this. In my mind it was harmless 
fun, but I've seen 'significant others' go ape-shit when they hear 
such stuff, and then the arguments and accusations start to fly 
about flirting, cheating and all sorts of other stuff, all over some 
innocent banter.

You might as well get used to Shelton, he turns out to be a 
pretty good friend, even if he is always chasing my tail. Sorry, 
that sounds vulgar doesn't it? Oh well.


**********

Sharon was standing off to my right speaking with the 
hairdresser explaining what the cut should look like and the 
whole time I could feel my stomach twisting as I watched 
Sharon draw invisible lines along my neck and face.

"Shit that's a lot of hair!" I mumbled in despair.
 
"Everything's going to be okay, you're going to look wonderful" I 
felt the hairstylist lean in close, her warm reassuring voice 
entering my left ear canal, but it did very little to ease my 
concerns.
 
"Don't worry strong girl you won't loose all of your strength 
when your hair is cut." Sharon rubbed my right shoulder ever 
trying to bring some lightheartedness into the moment and I 
smiled. 'Uh oh! My cheeks are trembling...that's a bad sign it 
means I'm going to cry!' Good grief I feel pathetic, about to ball 
because my long blonde hair was getting cropped about 
shoulder length.
 
Snip....snip....snip.....and sure enough the next thing I knew 
my right hand was brushing the tears off my cheeks as my hair 
floated away, down to the ground below. I have to say it helped 
that the woman cutting my hair was such an artist, it was a 
distraction to watch as she sculpted, cut, slashed and shaped 
my locks of hair. She was so graceful with the scissors and 
razor that I became momentarily mesmerized by the flashing 
metal reflecting off the overhead lights. 
 
Now why would going from totally unmanaged and unkempt, to 
something smooth, shapely and glamorous cause my insides to 
flip-flop? I didn't know! But as the hours wore on that day I felt 
my body slowly succumb to the delicious body treatment that 
ensued. Pedicure, Manicure, Facial, Makeup, Hair. This was a 
full service salon and Sharon had outdone herself in making 
sure I was well taken care of.
 
But who am I kidding, I knew for damn sure that there was no 
way I was going to be able to maintain this level of style, but for 
one night I did my best to pull it all together:
 
1 'Convertible' bra cause I'm wearing a strapless dress.

1 Pair of Black Evening shoes with almost three inch heels! 
YIKES!

1 Diamante v-string thong (Mmmmm I don't normally like 
thongs, but damn I looked incredibly sexy in it and it felt good 
under the gown).

1 Micro-Fleece Classic Gown, slits going up the left and right 
side, but not that high.
 
Ready to go! (I won't bore you with the makeup, shaving, and 
other personal attention that goes into making us look nice for 
you guys.)
 
"Hey! I look pretty damn hot!" I blurted out in front of the full 
length mirror, turning to the left, then to the right several times, 
taking small steps as if fearful the image was a mirage. In truth 
I barely recognized myself, my hair had that radiant sheen and I 
simply couldn't stop smiling, also I was proud for once at having 
decent size breasts which really sealed-the-deal with this 
particular dress. My cleavage was going to be on display 
tonight for sure!
 
Sharon stood off to one side nodding her head with approval, 
extremely impressed with my outcome, almost feeling like 
some proud parent, even though I did pick up a hint of jealousy. 
Just bitchy girl stuff. Sharon always talked about how I was a 
diamond-in-the-rough. But tonight I really shined and that took 
the spotlight off of her.

It was one of the best nights of my life, a firestorm of attention 
from guys and girls (even from some of the girls that disliked 
me), everyone complimented my appearance. Everything was 
paying off it seemed, my hard work in the gym had given my 
body a defined physique that was nicely shown off in the dress; 
being strapless my neck, shoulders and arms were on display, 
and the sexiest part was the slit up the side of the gown 
showing off my calves and thighs. For once I relished every bit 
of it and oddly enough the intense male attention didn't seem to 
bother Dale, in fact it only pumped his pride and ego up even 
further.

I felt bad for those girls that are emaciated waifs, starving their 
already thin bodies to try and go down just one more dress 
size. They look sickly thin and pale, while I on the other hand 
look healthy and well toned. Trust me, how I try to encourage 
them to eat more and exercise to put weight on, the good news 
is I have managed to convert some of them and they look 
awesome! 
  
"Things are winding down, do you want to head on up?" Dale 
whispered as he slid his right arm around my back and pulled 
me in close. He was exceedingly proud tonight, constantly 
paying me compliments, never away from my side for a 
moment.
 
"Sure." I sighed, I was getting sleepy anyway....Wait! What did 
he just say?  "What? Go up where?" I suddenly looked over at 
him, we were almost eye level now with my heels.
 
"I got us a room for the night." He smiled casually, "I can't wait 
to peel this dress off your hot body. Besides it's late and I 
thought it would be convenient and romantic to have our own 
room tonight." I was a bit speechless, on one hand it made 
sense and did sound romantic, after all the event was being 
hosted by one of the really luxury hotels in the area. 'But I know 
he's up to something' my mind continued to suspect as I felt his 
hands caressing up and down my waist pulling me in tighter.
 
"Just come on up and see." Dale smiled mischievously and I 
admit I was very excited at the moment so I went along with his 
plans. We walked up the spiral staircase to the second floor 
while my heart was pounding furiously, 'Am I actually second 
guessing myself? No! He us not asking for sex, but yet the plan 
is obvious!' I continued to wrestle with things emotionally.

'We will sleep in the same bed, but no sex!' There! Done deal! 
My willpower can overcome all! 

Then he slipped the key card in and the light turned green, 
'Bingo we were in! And that sneaky devil had been planning 
something for sure.' I just walked into that room took a look 
around and burst into tears, it was a beautiful sight to behold!

"Why are you crying?" He rushed over.
 
"It's so beautiful!" I babbled as my tear-blurred eyes swept 
across the room. The lights were low and some beautifully 
romantic music played in the background. But I think it was the 
rose pedals....they formed a trail from the door, up to the bed 
and were carefully littered all about while a huge arrangement 
of red roses sat on the nearby dresser. I've had a lot of guys in 
High School and College try to romance me away from my 
boyfriends, all sorts of elaborate stunts, but this was just 
amazing! My guard was down and my emotions were running 
high, now my body and mind wanted to make love to this man! 
Once again my body, mind, and all that other psychological 
stuff goes to war against one another.

"Oh baby." He sighed and pulled me into this incredibly warm 
embrace, our bodies were on fire....errr....make that my body 
was on fire. Dale's is always on fire. He was pushing all the 
right buttons tonight and I was almost ready to just give myself 
over to him, to consummate our relationship, to let him take me 
and make love to me all night. I wanted it....I wanted him....I 
wanted him 'in me', 'on top' of me....you name it. I knew my 
body was into it as I realized I was involuntarily grinding my 
crotch against his and that set off a chain reaction on both our 
parts. His hands moved down and cupped my ass, squeezing 
firmly as our mouths mated against one another.
 
'Shit I'm going to ruin the dress!' My mind screamed as we 
pulled and ground against one another, standing in the middle 
of that room, 'Fuck the dress!' I sighed privately and gave in. 
We carefully guided one another to the bed and I took the 
initiative by pushing on his shoulders, the back of his knees hit 
the edge of the mattress and he sat down breaking off the kiss. 
He looked up at me and then began to lie back, pulling me 
down on top of him. The dress was getting in the way so I 
began to hike it up high on my legs so I could straddle his 
waist, and I think that's when he thought I had given him the 
green light. I suppose I can understand his view on things as I 
was responding to everything at this point and being pretty 
aggressive myself.
 
Damn he is quick! He had that zipper down, belt unbuckled, 
and penis out in seconds, the touch against my inner thighs 
was startling at first but I was still into kissing and his touches, 
so I let it go for the moment. I felt him try to move a little lower 
and get 'into position', yet I still didn't say anything to stop him, 
but my right hand was already moving down to intervene. I felt 
the track of his hand moving up my leg and then under my 
dress, searching for something, to remove that final barrier with 
his deft fingers that ran along the trim of my panties. He gently 
traced the outline of the fabric, no amateurish poking or 
prodding, but soft pleasurable strokes. 
 
"Hold on." I whimpered.
 
"What." He gasped in my ear as he nibbled on my earlobe.
 
"Unzip me." I moaned. Breaking off to get undressed was a real 
challenge, my entire body was hot, so horny and I was soaking 
wet between the legs that it felt like some animalistic urge was 
taking me over. I wanted to rip my clothes off and his, to 
dominate, to utterly and sexually dominate him. 'God what has 
gotten into me?'

"As you wish." He groaned with a faint smile. We got off the bed 
and I turned my back to him, his hot breath whispered on my 
neck, the hairs stood up in response, he didn't unzip me right 
away, but started to kiss my neck and shoulders in a slow and 
tender manner, I thought of Nikki kissing me, but only for a 
second. As for expectations, Dale knew the ground rules, sure 
he might push things as he always does, but I was willing to let 
things go a little further tonight, just not all the way. He slid his 
hands down around my waist and to my stomach pulling me 
tight against him. It didn't take long before the simmering heat 
that exists between us began to once again build into a 
volcanic thunder. He was grinding his crotch into my butt and I 
was grinding right back as his hands were cupping my breasts 
thru the dress.

"I get so hot for you it drives me crazy." I sighed.

"I love hearing you say that," Dale whispered, "but you keep a 
lot to yourself Corbin, it would nice to hear it more often."

I just smiled, he was right, I rarely expressed my physical 
desires toward him verbally.  Finally his fingers slowly moved 
the tiny zipper down and I turned around. Dale had already 
started undressing and I loved his body, he was ripped and has 
a six pack of abs and wonderful muscles all over, without a 
word spoken I slipped off my dress, my bra and then pushed off 
my panties. This was an action that I did not take lightly, his 
eyes went wide absorbing every inch as I stood fully nude 
before him. His look conveyed something else, a look not only 
of adoring, but of pure lust. I just blushed and tilted my head, 
Dale was also now fully nude and his penis as hard as that 
body of his. His penis....that large, scary object that seemed to 
have a it's own zip code. From base to tip it twitched with a life 
of it's own. 

'And I am expected to do what? With that!' My brain agonized.

Simultaneously we both knelt onto the bed and then I had the 
oddest thought, I remembered a night in my room, we he asked 
me to make a muscle with my arm. I smiled and spontaneously 
raised both arms to perform a double bicep pose, twisting my 
torso just a little while flexing my abs. The look on his face was 
priceless, his eyes got wide and he entered into what I call a 
'trance like state', his hands immediately reached out and 
touched my stomach, shoulders, and then my biceps, he 
couldn't get enough. 

"I love your body," He was spoke and moved like a man 
possessed! "Your so hard, so sexy, so amazing!" I then lowered 
my arms as we moved our knees toward one another. Dale 
was all over me, not clumsy or random, but he wanted to 
explore and arouse me at the same time. He was succeeding 
on all fronts! The felling of his chest hair across my breasts was 
warm and soothing, his large erection throbbing against my 
belly sent an erotic shiver up my spine. Slowly we started to 
kiss, open mouths hovering and touching, tongues rolling 
against one another. Our strong bodies lowered to the bed, and 
rolled across the covers while our legs and arms intertwined, I 
was trembling as our bodies seemed to grind and writhe 
against one another, almost as if we were wrestling.

I was on top of him now, and could feel his hips push up, the 
heat between our sexes was incredible, in that moment I felt 
the incredible chemistry that exists between a man and a 
woman, and how powerful the desire to make love can really 
be. Our kissing never stopped as I felt the length of his penis 
rub along the length of my labia, I was so wet and slippery! 
Dale even said so.

I had to reach down between our bodies to control the 
movement for fear of him accidentally achieving the right angle 
and trying to enter me. I cupped the length of his long shaft, it 
felt so hot to the touch as I moved down until it now pressed 
firmly against ridges of my lower abs. My action caused him to 
instantly thrust upward, I held it tight against me as I helped him 
rub his erection between my hand and my stomach. The 
thickness and power of holding his penis was amazing, the 
effect on me was staggering, at times I thought I could literally 
feel my body reacting to this man under me, making me ready 
to accept him and I wanted him in me, to become apart of me. I 
could tell it wouldn't be long before he was ready to cum, every 
fiber of his being had but one desire, to be inside of me, to 
hump and thrust against my body, to overcome any barrier and 
restrictions, he would not be satisfied until he had made love to 
me.

I pulled away some and noticed his face was flushed, beads of 
sweat covering his forehead, he was breathing heavy and 
seemed to be struggling not to cum yet. "You turn me on like no 
other women I have ever met." He moaned, his hands always 
seemed to gravitate to my breasts and/or butt, or both at the 
same time, one hand on each. 

"Oh God," He groaned and mumbled something that was 
slightly incoherent. I was seriously getting off on this, I looked 
up and smiled a little at this man writhing on the bed, he wanted 
me so bad, he wanted what I had. And just then I had visions of 
him on his knees proposing marriage, then the look on his eyes 
as he carries me over the threshold into a room much like this 
one. Oh yeah, I was horny as well, I was breathing hard and 
covered in sweat from our making-out and the pure lust. My left 
hand had moved down under my body and between my legs 'I 
am so wet!' I thought, my plentiful juices kept me well lubricated 
as I rubbed on my clit. It took only few seconds more before a 
few faint shudders to roll thru my body, 'Oh yes!' I even 
moaned. 

(I'm sure it's rather sickening to read all of this, but hey tough 
shit! You dopes reading this should feel lucky that I am sharing 
as much as I am.)

I began to pull back and kissed down his chest, I glanced up 
and smiled, his eyes were wide-open with anticipation. My 
curiosity had gotten the better of me, as had my desires, but I 
also wanted to please Dale and I know he ached for me to go 
down on him, which I always flat out refused in the past. Part of 
my refusal was that I was nervous, would I be any good at it? Is 
there a grading scale for this kind of thing?

Now my face was right up on it, it looked even bigger close up! 
The head seemed enormous and I was fascinated by the 
incredible desire to kiss it, to put my mouth on it. I decided I 
was going to do whatever I wanted and let the rest take care of 
itself, if he enjoyed it great, if not, so be it! But the first thing I 
did was press my lips against the tip slowly and gently, it was 
so soft and warm. I glanced up again and smiled, his chest 
rising and lowering quickly as I settled into a slow exploration of 
his penis, and there was a lot to explore. I proceeded to kiss 
and lick the head before moving my lips and tongue down the 
shaft. My right hand was gently squeezing his large balls as my 
mouth and tongue worked up and down the shaft. Dale was 
beginning to moan and squirm a lot more, every time I put my 
lips on his head he would gently thrust upward as if attempting 
to enter my mouth. I wasn't ready to take him into my mouth yet 
so I would pull back some, maybe he thought I was just teasing 
him. 

'He must be liking this.' I thought because he was moaning 
'Yes, oh my god Corbin, yes, thank you.'

Thank you? Well at least he is appreciative after all he has 
been begging me to give him oral sex ever since we started 
dating.

My left hand gripped near the base and pushed his cock 
straight up so I could more easily take the tip into my mouth, 
my right hand continued to squeeze his balls, he really liked 
that for some reason. And I thought it odd that I was really 
enjoying giving him oral sex, it was exciting. I will have to think 
long and hard about this later, my more analytical side coming 
into play. I love to psychoanalyze my attitude and behavior 
especially since I always lectured girlfriends about safe sex and 
not giving guys any kind of sexual gratification until after 
marriage.

Dale still lay sprawled out on his back but I moved off to his 
right side into a semi kneeling position to get more comfortable. 
I thought about the best position to be in when I finally tried to 
take more of him into my mouth, I figured if I faced away from 
him while scooting up close to his body I could hunch over, 
yeah that should do it. My lack of experience is pretty telling 
huh? 

Now my ass is facing towards his head and he seized the 
opportunity (as any man would I suppose) to squeeze my ass 
with his right hand, his probing fingers ran down my crack until 
they found my pussy, that's when I lost all concentration. His 
fingers began to gently massage my outer labia. I mean I totally 
zoned out. My mouth was wide open and eyes closed as I 
began to moan, I literally had to force myself to focus back on 
his beautiful prick. Some part of me wanted to pull away, a 
control thing I guess, but it felt too damn good!

"Your so wet." He moaned and I responded by slowly moving 
my mouth over his large head and felt the soft spongy tip push 
past my lips, now my lips were wrapped around the head, 
trapping it inside my mouth as my tongued drilled into the tip 
and massaged his large flowering head. I had to open my 
mouth very wide, a little uncomfortable given how thick he is. 
Dale's hand had stopped and he was arching his back, 
moaning louder now, but his fingers slowly started to move 
down my slit until he finally zeroed in on my clit. My mind is 
spinning, his slow rubbing caused me to grunt and moan while 
my whole body felt aroused beyond anything I have ever 
experienced. He tilted his pelvis pushing the shaft further into 
my mouth, I tried to relax my jaws and lips to accept more of 
him but it was becoming a real challenge. I was convinced that 
there was no way I could take but a few inches of his 
monstrous penis.

Dale had started pulling on my left ankle, then he was pulling 
on my calf muscle trying to move my left leg over his chest and 
I became suddenly nervous, I may be inexperienced but I am 
no dummy! He was moving us into a sixty-nine position! Well 
heck, since I am going down on him at least he wants to return 
the favor! 

I think? I hope!

He guided my hips down with his hands and I felt his lips kiss 
my pussy, "So beautiful" He moaned and began to lick me, my 
whole body jerked and squirmed as he kissed, licked, and 
sucked on my pussy. He moved his tongue inside of me and I 
even had a slight orgasm initially, I thought, I was loosing my 
concentration as I found myself practically lying on top of him 
with my mouth open and eyes closed. I just kept moaning and 
came two more times as his fingers, mouth, and tongue worked 
on my clit. I totally forgot about his penis as I ground my crotch 
into his attentive mouth, a finger from his left hand started to 
rub across my anus and that was a turn on as well, surprisingly. 
Finally my whole body started to shake from a tremendous 
orgasm. Quickly I had to lean forward just out of his reach as 
my clit was so sensitive from the stimulation. 

"Thank you Dale that was incredible." I moaned, or groaned, or 
something. I was able to gather just enough of my senses 
together to finish sucking on his dick (okay yeah, when put that 
way it sounds nasty, but erotic at the same time, how odd). 

I was extremely pleased with that orgasm and Dale's never 
ending attention to me, I now returned my focus back on him. 
So open wide! And I took as many inches as I could, this 
resulted in instant moaning from Dale. I was determined to take 
as much of his penis into my mouth as I could. I focused on 
relaxing when I would feel the tip hitting the back of my throat, I 
would pull back and stroke his shaft several times while using 
my tongue on his head, that's when I suddenly began to taste 
something slightly biter, a trickle of pre cum had begun, 
amazingly it didn't gross me out. Open wide, breath deep, and 
relax was the routine as I tried to take him deeper. I was 
stunned that I did not gag once, but let's be real, there was no 
way I was going to achieve this task completely, he was either 
too big, or I was too nervous and way too inexperienced (a 
combination of all I believe).

He was close to cumming so I just started pumping harder and 
continued to suck on the tip of his penis, while doing this Dale's 
hands continued to rub and stroke my thighs and butt. 
Suddenly he let out this great groan and a second later his 
crotch thrust upward, repeatedly! Almost instinctively I moved 
my mouth away, he started to come more violently then I ever 
recalled. I froze watching his amazing body cum, up he shot his 
cum and it landed on the back of my right shoulder, good Lord! 
One minute it looked like high voltage was running thru him, 
then he was barely moving, it was very surreal. I thought he 
was actually unconscious for a second taking deep breaths as 
his eyes were shut like he was asleep.

I turned my body around, "Dale? You okay?" I whispered and 
gave him a sharp nudge I really hoped he was not dying on me! 
That's all I need!

"Yeah, oh yeah, my God Corbin," he smiled and then I smiled. 
"I have never cum that hard in my entire life!" Dale sighed, "I 
can wait to make love to you." Such a very presumptuous 
statement on his part, well not really, he had become very vocal 
about his intentions to marry me after College. As I indicated 
earlier everything about our lives had become intertwined.

With so many duds out there Dale was a real gem, totally loyal 
and devoted to me. "I love you." he moaned into my mouth and 
I responded in kind, I was still laying on top of him, slowly 
letting my weight settle completely. There was a refreshing 
feeling of freedom, laying her totally nude with my boyfriend. 
Our arms and legs caressing around one another.

The moment lasted a few more minutes, but was shattered 
when my thoughts suddenly shifted to Nikki, yet again! Here I 
am lying with Dale an I am now thinking of Nikki and getting 
even more turned on. I am seriously messed up!

"I am so fortunate to have such a beautiful, sexy girl here in my 
arms." He said which suddenly got me back into the moment. I 
tried not to laugh and took the compliment in stride, I don't think 
of myself as this incredible sexy person.

I then made him get up and clean up all that 'stuff' he just 
squirted all over the place because I am the boss!

We rolled over and snuggled up into a tight spoon position to 
sleep for the night. In that moment I have never felt more safe 
and secure, I even smiled a little to myself as I felt the 
wonderful bliss of sleep creep up on my mind and body. I like 
feeling as if my future was set, that Dale and I would graduate 
and start building a life together. In this moment everything 
seemed perfect and I was confident I could plow thru any 
challenges that the future my throw my way.



**********


Dale literally scooped me up in his arms and carried me into my 
room, it was fun, silly, but very romantic at the same time, Dale 
and I were at the highlight of our relationship. Not only that but 
Sharon and I were getting ready to move into our own 
apartment, something I was very excited about as well. 

My future seemed so bright, safe and orderly, so why was my 
mood suddenly changing? 

In a matter of a few minutes I went from feeling exuberant to 
feeling down, even uneasy about my entire life. 

Life is funky huh? Or am I?

My cell phone went off and I jerked around, I hesitated upon 
seeing the caller ID, but then swiped it off my desk. I caught my 
breath and felt instant dread and happiness. Uh-oh, storm 
warning, female emotions are in-play!

"Yo woman!" I said smartly into the phone.

"Yo woman!" Nikki replied. We kind of developed these silly 
greetings.

And then I felt my whole face scrunch up tight as I opened my 
mouth, I just get drawn deeper into something with Nik. The 
dread was increasing because I keep wanting to *snap out of it* 
and finally realize Nikki and I are just an experimental fling, but 
that didn't happen, won't happen, will never happen! 

Where had all my resolve from the night before gone?

Dale and I are doomed, now I want to cry.

"I've missed you." Nikki said and suddenly we were on that 
wavelength that seemed to exist from the first moment we met. 

I pressed my lips against the small plastic receiver and sat 
down on my bed, and began to speak those words, they 
seemed to come from a more powerful place then my 
consciousness could control, "I keep thinking about you, about 
us being together." My breath suddenly got caught up in my 
chest and I closed my eyes, tears of sadness and joy flooded 
my eyes.

"I feel the same way love." Nikki moaned back into the phone, 
we were caught up in that intimate connection even over a cold 
digital cell phone. This was an amazing, telling moment, even 
after each of us having had a wonderful weekend with our 
respective boyfriends we both knew that our attraction to each 
other will end up crashing thru every barrier, destroying 
everything in its path. How odd, how ironic, that we both share 
the same commitment to saving ourselves for marriage but 
have never hesitate getting immediately physical with one 
another, go figure! But wait, there is a big dilemma going on in 
my little brain, how am I ever supposed to have sex with a man 
when I may end up with a woman!

Drat! Double drat!

"Please come over." Nikki said quickly, her voice urgent. There 
was something very different in her, a desperate quality that 
beckons me, something that we both wanted to happen, 
something that has to happen.

"On my way." And I hung up, got changed and was out the 
door. No lovey-dovey goodbyes, time wasted talking is time I 
could spend on the way to her apartment, and I brought some 
sleep over clothes too.

The drive over was maddening, I was an emotional wreck as 
my fingers nervously gripped and wrung against the steering 
wheel. I knew what was going on with me and I knew what was 
going to happen when I got to Nikki's. The closer I got to her 
apartment the harder my heart pounded, and the source of all 
of this energy you might be wondering? My sex drive. I was so 
horny I could barely sit still in my seat, I kept clutching my inner 
thighs anxiously. Don't get me wrong, dating Dale for these 
past many months has been wonderful, and we have the best 
emotional and physical chemistry I could ever have hoped for. 
So what an unexpected twist of fate that I find the greatest 
emotional, spiritual, and physical connection with that of 
'another woman'. 

Nikki and I were on a sexual collision course from the first 
moment we met one another.

She opened the door wide, greeting me in those tight, sexy, 
faded jeans of hers that show off those long, toned legs. Up top 
she had on a tight faded maroon tee shirt, it was obvious she 
was not wearing a bra. She was looking sexier then ever. I 
dropped my sleepover bag and kicked the door closed with my 
left foot before walking into her arms, no 'Hello' or 'How was 
your weekend?' we were like two heat-seeking missiles with 
only one mission in life. Initially our lips touched lightly as we 
firmly crushed the front of our bodies together, her wonderful 
breasts pressing hard against mine. I felt her left hand reach 
around to lock the dead bolt while her other hand was groping 
my ass, our kissing and hugging soon turned into an assault on 
one another, pulling as hard as we dare. Our moaning and 
grunting was almost animalistic as we began to grind against 
each other, even pulling on each other's hair in some bizarre 
struggle to control the other.

'How could we have denied making love to our respective 
boyfriends just the night before? But we are both powerless to 
deny one another now?' It is a primitive and unexplainable thing 
that exists between us.

"Now, we make love." Nikki said, her Portuguese accent heaver 
then normal, her tongue licked my lower and upper lips.

"Yes." I sighed and gave her tongue a long, firm suck. Her 
hands moved around to the front and unhooked my jeans, I did 
the same to her and we slowly moved down the hallway. 

"Come my sweet, I have a surprise for you." Nikki's sweet, 
seductive voice beckoned. The lights were off, but candles 
illuminated the bathroom, a full tub of steaming water awaited 
us. A small bathroom, in a modest apartment suddenly became 
the most heavenly, romantic, and luxurious place on Earth for 
the two of us.

We then moved to her bed, I mean 'our bed' as Nikki now calls 
it. We explored, licked and kissed every inch of each other's 
body, I think I have tasted every inch of that girl's skin now and 
she mine. Nary a word spoken since I arrived that afternoon, 
and none need be, we simply spent long minutes staring into 
each other's eyes and watched the emotional tears run down 
our faces, we would then kiss the other's cheeks tenderly 
saying 'I love you' softly. Too many swirling thoughts I guess at 
first, but finally the words just started to flow, we both knew time 
was catching up with us and no longer could we play this game 
of deceit any longer.

Was it only almost 24 hours ago we were with our boyfriends? 

The intensity of the moment did not wane later into the evening 
as we got up to get a drink of wine, we stood nude in her 
kitchen as we admired and hugged one another, feeding each 
other copious amounts of white wine.

I also know what you fine readers are thinking; 'You two, good 
for nothing, cheating, backstabbing women! Sneaking around 
behind your boyfriends, who have been totally faithful, and now 
about to blindside them with this major breakup, you two don't 
deserve such good, decent guys!'

Hey now, don't be so harsh! We didn't plan this whole thing to 
happen, complications of the heart and all that deep emotional, 
philosophical stuff got in the way and how am I suppose to 
figure out all this stuff?....and study?....and practice 
sports?....and go to the gym! 

That's a lot of heavy lifting for my small brain!


**********


"Hey, why are you getting so defensive and upset, it was just 
an observation." Sharon folded her arms across her chest, 
casually tilting her head off to the left, that long, brown, 
hollywood hair of hers falling down around her shoulders. 

I abruptly stopped pacing in small circles and squared my 
shoulders up with Sharon, "Why am I so defensive? Because I 
see the look you give Nikki, could you make an effort to be 
nicer, you never have two nice words to say to her."
 
"Oh....It's me with the problem?" Sharon leaned back in shock 
as if she had been insulted, "Maybe Nikki's the one 
manipulating your time? Did you ever consider that?" Sharon 
shook her head with a slight 'no'.
 
"Stop trying to twist things around!" I fumed.
 
"Great, now I'm twisting things around," Sharon threw her 
hands in the air and walked around to my left.
 
"Wait right there Ms. Social-Sorority-Queen...." I made a 
pained expression "....you're reading way too much into 
things." I glared but Sharon just kept looking at me with those 
wounded blue eyes.
 
"She wants you Corbin." Sharon swallowed hard at saying that.
 
"What?" I stiffened and leaned back, almost totally pulling away 
from Sharon's touch.
 
"Okay, maybe I am wrong," Sharon's voice became soft as she 
lowered her head some, putting on her best act of self doubt 
and concern for me, "but you've had girl's flirt with you before 
Corbin, and I believe Nikki is seriously interested in you, more 
then friends, and it's messing with your head. That's all just my 
opinion and I'm sorry if it hurts you." Sharon reached in and 
hugged me.
 
Sharon's instincts were right on track so I had to scramble, to 
try and redirect the conversation, "I just wish you two got along, 
you don't even know her that well." I sighed and hugged 
Sharon back.

My Lord, it worked! Sharon let the issue drop....for now.


**********


One would think that conversation with Sharon would have 
helped set me straight. But as I looked across the soccer field 
and saw this tan, dark-skinned beautiful girl, her straight black 
hair falling out of her pony tail, sweat streaking down her toned, 
muscular arms and legs. Suddenly the thought of a husband, 
kids, picket fence and house made me want to gag. And then, 
this beautiful girl across the field paused and looked right over 
at me, she smiled a big, white toothy smile. I couldn't help but 
smile back.

There....we are together....even at a distance.....

....we are together, and we will make it.


*********