Celestial Reviews 233 - November 12, 1997
Note: Someone recently reposted "First Love," one of my favorite
stories ever. If anyone knows the name of the author, I'd like to
obtain that information. I want to repeat my recommendation that you
should put both the title of any story you post and the name of the
author IN THE MANUSCRIPT ITSELF. Uther Pendragon recently wrote the
following in a.s.s.d.:
Putting your name on your *posts* isn't enough. The title of your story
should be followed by your byline. The two of them should be on top of
your story below all introductory material and warnings. Then they
should both be repeated at the end of the story. I'm not talking about
sigfiles; I mean:
"THE END
Foretaste
Uther Pendragon"
Not only does this help prevent someone from stealing your story, it
also helps other people (such as struggling reviewers) figure out who
wrote the story and what its title is. Stories often get separated from
the cover messages that originally accompany them. If all I have is the
story and it has no author's name or title, I really cannot do a good
job of reviewing it. In addition, a reader who likes the story cannot
contact the author or look for more stories by that author.
Second note: (A joke from a cunning linguist) An American businessman
of Irish extraction had made his bundle, and decided to retire to the
Emerald Isle and become a gentleman farmer. Upon arriving at the Old
Sod, he bought some land with a farmhouse, then decided it was time to
acquire some livestock. He thereupon began marching to the neighboring
farm, to see what he could buy.
Halfway there, he came upon a local denizen riding on a donkey. "Hello
there," said the American. "How much would you want for that handsome
donkey of yours?"
"Twenty pounds, sir," said the local. "But here in Ireland we call it an
ass, not a donkey."
"Very well," said our friend. "Here's twenty pounds." The money and the
donkey changed hands, and our friend mounted his new steed and proceeded
to ride to the next farm.
When he approached the farm, he saw his neighbor in the chicken coop,
feeding his poultry. One brightly colored rooster immediately caught the
American's eye. "Top o' the mornin' to you, neighbor," he said. "How
much would you want for that good-looking rooster there?"
"Two pounds, my friend," said the farmer. "But hereabout we call it a
cock, not a rooster."
"You have a deal!" said the American, handing the farmer the money and
taking the rooster. He placed the rooster under his arm, and proceeded
to ride to the next farm to see if there were any bargains there.
The next farmer was also feeding his chickens when our friend arrived,
and one chicken in particular stood out among all the rest.
"Hello neighbor," he said, pointing to that chicken. "I'd like to buy
this chicken from you. How much would you want?"
"One pound would make you her proud owner," said the farmer. "But here
in Ireland we call it a pullet, not a chicken."
"Right!" said the American, handing the farmer a pound note. Beaming
with pride, he put the chicken under his other arm, and started riding
back to his farm.
As he approached his property, a farmer atop a hay wagon suddenly
appeared from beyond a curve in the road. The donkey was startled and
reared on its hind legs, throwing our friend to the ground. The rooster
and the chicken, sensing their opportunity, quickly slipped away and
began their escape.
Our friend began frantically chasing his animals, but they proved to
elusive to catch. Realizing he needed help, and remembering the local
terminology, he turned to the farmer on the hay wagon.
"Excuse me sir!" he shouted, "Would you mind holding my ass while I grab
my cock and pullet?"
Final note: Remember: even though someone else may be posting my reviews
for me, my e-mail address is still Celeste801@aol.com.
- Celeste
"Under Cover" by Mike Hunt (phone sex) 10, 10, 10
"Full House" by Unknown Author (sitcom parody with
pedophilia) 8, 5, 3
"The Choice" by Gamble (threesome in spirit-world)
9, 9, 9
"Tales of the East Indies" by Sven the Elder (exotic sex)
10, 10, 10
"A Dialogue Lesson" by Felix Lance Falkon (mm sex & grammar)
10, 10, 10
"Julie's Journey" by Vixen (threesome) 9, 7, 7
"Erotic Hideaway" by LM 1 (romantic sex) 10, 10, 10
"Catfight" by Mona (bdsm) 7, 7, 5
Guest Reviews:
"The Island" by losgud (adult incest) 9, 8, 9
"Rebel Monk of Wu Tang" by H.D. Meister (seduction)
8, 4, 2
"Boarding Pass" by Cynthia (airport sex) 10, 10, 9
"Cream Rub" by Captain Atom (massage parlor suck & fuck)
10, 8, 9
"Exchange Program" by Clint Quinn (sci fi sex) 10, 9, 10
"Just One Of The Guys" by Ann Douglas (gender reversal)
9.5, 10, 10
Reposted Reviews:
* "First Love" by Unknown Author (emerging adolescence
& romance) 10, 10, 10
* "Friction" by Mark Aster (threesome) 10, 9, 9
* "Exchange Program" by Clint Quinn (sci fi sex) 10, 10, 10
* = Repost of previous review (because the story has recently been
reposted)
"Under Cover" by Mike Hunt (MrM1ke@aol.com). I know some of you readers
think that I AM Mike Hunt. That's possibly because I enjoy Mike Hunt so
much and have great respect for Mike Hunt. But to be honest, I have to
admit that my admiration for Mike Hunt is based primarily on the fact
that in a sophomoric way sentences like the previous one are a lot of
fun to read out loud. My brother used to have a similar affinity for
people he referred to as I.P. Daily and Seymour Heine, the reputed
authors of "The Yellow River" and "Under the Cheerleaders' Bench,"
respectively.
No, Mike Hunt is Mike Hunt - a unique author whose imagination sometimes
astounds me. Take the present story, for example. Where would anyone
get the idea for a plot about a guy who decides to do some investigative
reporting on phone sex and then finds himself talking to a former
classmate during his first interview? Then when he visits her for an
in-person interview, the phone-sex goddess builds a fantasy for a caller
around her alleged experiences with Mike Hunt, who, of course, is
sitting there in her "office" getting himself off while listening to her
end of the conversation. Where would a person get an idea for a story
like this? The simplest explanation is that it must be true. However,
the best explanation is that he probably got it from his cellmate.
<Celeste 1, Mike Hunt 0>
One question I have is how did Jenny Sue get out of paying taxes? I
thought I was being really clever by managing to get out of taxes for my
profits on Celestial Reviews. But my method {making no profit whatsoever
and therefore being obligated to pay no taxes at all} pales in
comparison to this woman's method. I suspect her technique wouldn't
really work; at the very least she'd have to have sex with several IRS
or Bell Atlantic representatives.
Anyway, this is another good story. And I haven't told you the half of
it! Well, actually I HAVE told you just about half of it, but you might
as well read the story anyway.
Ratings for "Under Cover"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10
"Full House" by Unknown Author. Ever since his teenage years Joey has
known he was a pedophile. And since Danny and his wife had the girls
he has never passed up the opportunity to visit and admire the girls as
they grew up. Now he is left alone with Stephanie, the cute little sex-
year-old. But Joey is a harmless guy; dirty thoughts are only in his
mind. The prospect of actually DOING anything with the girls is out of
the question. He will never get the opportunity; girls this age aren't
interested in such things. So he has only admired from a distance.
But alas, Joey gets aroused during the movie he and Stephanie are
watching and the little girl says, "Come on, Joey, show it to me!
You've seen me plenty of times in the bath tub!" You might think that
things will get out of hand, but they don't. Not at first anyway: he
just fucks her orally and anally. But then DJ and Kimmie catch him in
the act, and Joey discovers that the whole pathological family is into
pedophilia and incest. In its own dysfunctional way, this is a
heartwarming story, I suppose. But it really is not a very good parody
of the TV sitcom with this title.
Ratings for "Full House"
Athena (technical quality): 8
Venus (plot & character): 5
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 3
"The Choice" by Gamble (eledin@netcom.com). Rashena's husband Eleron has
been seduced into some sort of spirit world by a mysterious, sensuous
female creature. In an attempt to recover Eleron's full affection,
Rashena follows him into that spirit world. But the spirit's power is
so great that she coerces Rashena also into a sensuous threesome. If
you can't lick 'em, join 'em.
This is a first story by a new author. It could have benefited from
some proofreading, but it's already pretty good. I hope to see more
from this author.
Ratings for "The Choice"
Athena (technical quality): 9
Venus (plot & character): 9
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9
"Tales of the East Indies" by Sven the Elder (sven@brass-
neck.demon.co.uk). This story struck me as a sort of a cross between a
Joseph Conrad short story and a couple of those letters in the Penthouse
Forum that I claim I never read on the plane when I've been away from my
husband for a long time so that I'm horny as hell by the time I get into
his arms. Meanwhile, he.... Ooops! I'll save that for my next letter
to the Forum.
The story covers the author's recent visit to "one of the more civilised
parts of South East Asia" - that part of the world where they are so
genteel and "civilised" that they use names like "Bang Cock" for major
cities and people have names like "Low Hung Dong." The sex is
interesting and nicely described.
Anyway, by messing around on this trip, the narrator of this story
(which is all true, except the bits he made up, and even they might be
true), improves his relationship with his wife. I have serious doubts
about the authenticity of that statement. However, the story about his
escapades DID improve my relationship with my husband, and least for a
half hour or so.
Ratings for "Tales of the East Indies"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10
"A Dialogue Lesson" by Felix Lance Falkon (owlswick@netaxs.com). I
don't review very many male/male sex stories - mostly because I'm too
busy reviewing stories that involve females. However, when I stumbled
across this little gem, I thought I should share it with you.
The basic idea is that the author uses the story itself (about two guys
having sex) to demonstrate how to punctuate a dialogue between two
people. It's very cleverly done; and if you can keep your mind off the
sex (which should be easy, if you're not a gay man), you can learn a lot
from this example.
Ratings for "A Dialogue Lesson"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10
"Julie's Journey" by Vixen (nymph@sirius.com). Julie has traveled a
long distance to meet her boyfriend. She meets a woman on the final leg
of her trip and invites her to come along with her; and, well, she cums
along with her. The boyfriend is delighted, and a good time is had by
all.
Ratings "Julie's Journey"
Athena (technical quality): 9
Venus (plot & character): 7
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 7
"Erotic Hideaway" by LM 1 (RNRH85C@prodigy.com). This is a really
simple but well-written story about a man and a woman who are deeply in
love with each other and who go away for a romantic tryst at a mountain
cabin. There's not much else to say about it. Read it with someone you
love.
Ratings "Erotic Hideaway"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10
"Catfight" by Mona (edited by Kathy) (From Kristen's Collection <
kristen78@aol.com>).
Yesterday at lunch I was walking through the cafeteria, when I heard a
male voice shout "Catfight!" as he rushed out the door. I followed the
crowd and found two blonde bimbos - er, students - grappling viciously
on the ground. I grabbed the top girl, and a male teacher seized the
other. After I pulled mine to her feet, she lunged at me; and I grasped
her hand in a simple wrist lock; whereupon, she said, "God! You're
killing me!" I answered that maybe that would be a good reason to move
along to the principal's office quickly.
This story explains what I SHOULD have done. Sort of. Basically, it's
a rehash of "It's My Party and I'll Humiliate You Publicly If You Fuck
with My Hunk If I Want To." It's probably a decent story (without
jello, of course) for people who like this sort of thing. Personally, I
think with a little work, my own story would be better. {As we entered
the door to the principal's office, there was Miss Johnson, sprawled
across the principal's desk with her ass almost glistening in the
sunlight, moist from his tongue, which was gently rimming....}
Ratings "Catfight"
Athena (technical quality): 7
Venus (plot & character): 7
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 5
"The Island" by losgud (lushgod@hotnomail.com). Guest review by
Bookman.
Coming off the rubble of "The Amazing Adventures of Penis Boy", I found
this story to be like a high hard dose in an oxygen bar. Clean, clear,
and fresh.
Actually, the two stories shouldn't even be mentioned together, for
"Island" is a very good story. The narrator is a 40-ish man who goes
out to an isolated family cabin to prepare for the rest of the family's
arrival for an upcoming holiday. Looking forward to some time alone, he
is mildly chagrined when his married daughter decides to come along.
Then daughter comes along. . .
"Island" stands above the usual Daddy Does Daughter crowd of incest
stories in several respects. One, the parties are of an age where, even
though they are related, they can choose for themselves; and two, these
people genuinely like and respect each other. At no time is there even
a hint that either party is taking undue or unfair advantage of the
other, so that the relationship is free of a taint that many other
writers doing incest stories would like to ignore but can't quite get
away from.
Losgud gives his protagonist a laconic, amusing voice and attitude that
makes him a character I, for one, would like to know in person. The
daughter is less well visualized, which leaves the reader unfortunately
stuck solely in the narrator's head. We never really see the forces
that move her to her (what must be life-changing) decision. She offers
a vague "this-is-something-I've-always-wanted-to-do" kind of reasoning,
which I found unsatisfying, given the rich reality woven for the
character of the father.
The humorous voice of the narrator, one of the central features in the
construction of the story, is also disturbing, on a basic level.
Losgud's words drawl across the page, making the father a likable person
in his own right, but they have the counter effect of diluting the sex
when it finally arrives. There's no way an author (go ahead, prove me
wrong, folks) can maintain that kind of self-mocking attitude going
through an intense sex scene. {Actually, take a look at Mike Hunt or
Friar Dave- Celeste.} Either the very single-minded concentration
demanded to make the sex hot will obviate the self-mockery, or the sense
of humor will make the intensity of the sex scene seem hollow and silly.
Losgud tries to go for hot-and-heavy, but doesn't achieve it, and the
final result is a haphazard warm-and-romantic. The story maintains its
integrity as a whole, but one senses the lack of a commitment to the
act, and the changed relationship implied by the act, that would have
brought the entire incident into sharper focus.
The story is posted in two parts, and the reader is left with the vague
feeling that there's a Part 3 lurking out there somewhere. These two
people have started changes in their lives that will ripple out in
unseeable directions. Losgud's ending only hints at what those
directions might be.
Technically, very good. I only found one typo, which means the more
obsessive of you are now free to go perusing through the story to find
what it was.
Ratings for "Island"
Athena: 9
Venus: 8
Apollo: 9
"Perverted Monks: Rebel Monk of Wu Tang" by H.D. Meister
(dez187lm@hotmail.com). Guest review by Sven the Elder.
The Author starts by saying that, and I quote - "I've been told that the
best way to enjoy a masterpiece is to look at the entire work first."
Now that just happens to be the way I review stories as well. Except
that this gave me a problem. Generally, as I read something, an idea -
an approach, whatever, begins to gel in my mind as to how I can proceed,
what direction I can take, what slant to put on things. But after my
first and second read through's of this story there was nothing, other
than the somewhat unkind thought that as an entry for alt.sex.*stories*
{my emphasis} - this was almost an off-topic post.
There I feel better for that, now let's look in a little more detail at
what is going on. This is a description of the author of both himself
and the way, almost clinically, that he goes about, in a very
streetwise way, seducing young women in his environment. It is short -
a couple of pages; given the length, it is very fact-oriented; it is
also quite well constructed. It is also pretty short on entertainment
value. Hence my earlier comment that it was close to being off-topic.
I have to say that the style, the introduction, almost the apology for
the writer's background have little to do with my rejection. It would
not matter if the author were green, came from Mars, and had sex by
sticking his finger in either his own or his partner's ear; I like to
be entertained. I find that the various very good and established (and
also the not so established) writers and contributors to our sexy,
fantasy world, mostly do this to great success. Some a little tongue-
in-cheek, some with great seriousness, others with either great
eroticism or romanticism. But all with one common theme - they seek to
entertain. Sadly this tract is too matter of fact, too clinical and as
a story has no development. Sorry, not for me; and as you can imagine my
ratings reflect that.
Ratings for "Rebel Monk of Wu Tang"
Technical quality: 8
Plot & character: 4
Sven (appeal to reviewer): 2
"Boarding Pass" by Cynthia (Versutiae@aol.com). Guest review by Dart.
A couple, each with a career to pursue, may find it difficult to arrange
their schedules in order to be together. She travels, he travels: but
with luck their paths cross frequently enough that their physical need
for each other gets satisfied.
Well, for Tim and Adrienne, luck has recently been eluding them. They're
desperate for each other, but they're on their way to the airport, since
she has a plane to catch. And their ministrations during the drive only
have the effect of heightening their mutual frustration. They arrive at
the airport fifteen minutes before her boarding call, fifteen minutes to
spend together. At the gate, he rubs her shoulders, trying to ease her
tension, soften their parting. It doesn't work. They kiss; they rub;
they get stared at.
Fifteen minutes later, she boards her flight a very happy frequent
flyer. You'll have to read the story to discover their innovative
solution - innovative and a little improbable. At least, I wouldn't have
had the courage to implement it.
This is a nicely written and nicely paced story. What I most liked about
the story, other than the couple's daring of course, was their affection
for each other.
Ratings for "Boarding Pass"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Dart (appeal to reviewer): 9
"Cream Rub" by Captain Atom (captatom@thepentagon.com). Guest Review by
M1ke Hunt.
"Cream Rub" by Captain Atom is one of those simple fuck and suck stories
that readers around here seem to enjoy. Of course it would be only fair
to note that there's no fucking or sucking in the piece, but if you
ponder the hidden meaning in the title you can probably figure out what
the story's about.
Technically proficient, not much character development, but quite
appealing. Especially if you haven't been to a massage parlor lately.
Damn. Gave away the surprise twist ending.
Ratings for "Cream Rub"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 8
Mikeus (appeal to reviewer): 9
"Exchange Program" by Clint Quinn. Guest review by M1KE HUNT. {Note
from Celeste: I originally reposted a guest review of this story back
in CR 194. I could pretend that I am doing a validity check - sending
the story to a second reviewer to check for consistency; but actually
what we have here is a case of the original review arriving about five
months late, after I had reassigned it to someone else. Since I never
ignore anything by Mike Hunt <I love to read Mike Hunt sentences out
loud!>, I'm posting Mike's review here. I'll repost the other review
(by Michael K. Smith) at the end of this issue. As you can see, they
are in agreement that this is a good story. Now maybe somebody will
repost this story....}
S'pose, just for the sake of argument, you met a girl who looked 15 but
was really 40, and s'pose she'd never had sex, and s'pose she asked you
to teach her about it. Oh, and I forgot to mention, s'pose she was an
alien from the planet Welnaria. You'd still "do it," right?
Luckily female Welnarians are anatomically the same as female humans,
but for males the Welnarian penis is just three centimeters long, oh,
and on Welnaria sex is only for procreation, not recreation. Well
naturally lady Welnaria is curious when she happens upon (literally) the
standard earthling package. Hell, she'd have even thought *I* was big.
"Exchange Program" is a cute sci-fi story about Welnarian sex, or the
lack of it. If the "sci-fi" parts scares you off, don't let it, because
there's not much of it here. In fact, the story could have been about
first-sex for a 15-year-old without much of a rewrite. The author
doesn't spend a lot of time conjuring up futuristic images for the
backdrop, but that's OK, because it's a bright read even without it.
It's worth a few minutes of your time, especially if your spaceship is
stuck at Galaxon 5 because of the neutron particle bombardment in the
Xy-4 ring that's been screwing up everybody's travel schedule lately.
Ratings for "Exchange Program"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 9
Mikeus (appeal to reviewer): 10
"Just One Of the Guys" by Ann Douglas (annd@pop.tiac.net). Guest Review
by Piper.
Oh, dear. Terry Griffith has gotten herself into a rather awkward
situation. How did he do this? Simple. She went on a double date.
What's wrong with that, you ask? After all, at 18, he's likely been out
on a few double dates before. The difference with this one is that the
date is with Sandy, a beautiful young lady.
If you're wondering, Terry is actually a young woman, a high school
senior in this story. She wants to be a writer, a newspaper columnist;
and she's very serious about it. Unfortunately, *serious* doesn't seem
to hold any weight with the teachers when you're beautiful and have legs
that go on forever. This comment, from the school paper's faculty
adviser, seems to summarize everyone's attitude, including her boyfriend
and younger brother:
"You should have something to fall back on if you don't make it
as a reporter. You're a pretty girl, you could be a model."
In a sort of twist on the _Victor/Victoria_ theme, Terry switches
schools, and switches genders. *She* is now *he*.
My advice? Girls, if you want to masquerade as a guy, don't get
cornered into going out on a double date. If you do get talked into it,
don't agree with going to the local make-out spot. If you find yourself
there anyway, don't let the other couple disappear, and don't get half
corked. If everything goes wrong and you find yourself alone with your
date in a dark, sandy cave and you're not quite sober, do not - I repeat
- do not let your date stick her hand down your pants.
Too bad Terry didn't have the benefit of my advice ;-).
I liked this story. Despite appearances, it's not really a TG type of
story, since Terry doesn't really want to be a man. She just wants the
kind of respect a man automatically gets in a man's world (still a
truth, even today). Also, this is a rather light-hearted look into the
problem, one that only touches on the serious side of this premise. My
only real quibble is technical. The storyline is tight, but the
proofreading is incomplete. Commas are occasionally used
inappropriately, as are periods. Normally this isn't a problem,
especially if the author is doing this to create a particular feel or
mood, but in this case, the errors actually interfere with the smooth
flow of the story.
Ratings for "Just One Of The Guys"
Technical merit 9.5
Plot and character 10
Appeal to reviewer 10
* "First Love" by Unknown Author. This story presents an interesting
paradox. I don't know who wrote it or how it got posted. I want to
review it and give it some publicity, because it is good. On the other
hand, I don't want to violate the author's copyright privileges. I
don't mind associating with and befriending people who write about
topics that are taboo to "decent society"; in fact I find most of the
people who write for and lurk on this newsgroup to be interesting,
intelligent people with whom I share common interests. But I draw the
line at copyright infringement. The authors work hard on these stories,
and they deserve to receive credit for their own work.
Using simple logic, since I know two people who say they got this story
through this newsgroup, I think I can assume that it was posted here at
least once. In general people who post are willing to have their work
reposted in the same forum; or even better, they'll repost it themselves
if they become aware of the request to do so. Therefore, what I am
going to do is post this REVIEW and let someone else (either a reposter
like Red Dragon, who seems to have an extensive collection, or the
author him/herself) repost the actual story.
After I read the first few lines of this story, I simply could not put
it down. This story is long - real long - nearly 95,000 words long. I
knew I should have been correcting my students' papers and going over
the next day's lesson; but I rationalized by telling myself that this
story was about kids like those I teach, and this story would help me
understand those kids better. Right! That's the ticket! Read this
story for its pedagogical value.
The story focuses primarily on a young girl going through her high
school years and her first sexual experiences. Aside from its
interesting plot, what I liked most about this story was its realistic
use of interesting details and events. For example, without realizing
that the answering machine is recording his entire conversation, Matt
brags to his friend on the telephone about his conquest of Jen. His
parents listen to the recording and have to confront him. Later, Matt
gets beat up by Jen's former boyfriend. When he gets home afterwards,
his mother hastily assumes that Jen had something to do with the beating
and angrily drags Matt off to Jen's house to confront her. It is
difficult to predict the reaction of the protagonists to these subtle
but interesting events; and they greatly enrich the plot as it unfolds.
Jen and the others in the story experience occasional communication
problems - usually arising from moods and an inability to express
emotions correctly. These problems are common among young people going
through adolescence. The author understands these problems thoroughly
and does a good job of setting them up and bringing them to resolution.
What this story actually reads like is a juiced-up Judy Blume novel.
I'm certain it's not, since I have read all of that author's
acknowledged work. Wouldn't it be nice if kids could read and discuss a
book like this in their English classes? They can't, of course, because
it talks about kids having sex and uses words like clit, cum, and cunt.
The characters also engage in ecstatic sex that is a lot of fun and in
irresponsible activities that cause them really serious problems. Of
course, since high school kids don't have sex and don't know the meaning
of clit, cum, and cunt, they shouldn't read a story like this - even if
the vicarious experience might help them deal with some of those
problems in their own lives. They should read "The Scarlet Letter" and
"Moby Dick" instead. The good news is that in schools all over the
country we are forcing kids to read Hawthorne and Melville, and their
predominant reaction is to think those authors really suck. Kids mean
nothing personal against those authors when they say things like that -
they have no idea what those stories are about anyway, unless they read
Cliff's Notes. Since the present story is banned for them, they'll
almost certainly read it, enjoy it, and learn from it. I certainly hope
somebody reposts this story soon, so that the young people who don't
lurk on this newsgroup can not read it.
Ratings for "First Love"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10
"Friction" by Mark Aster (MyFrThAl@aol.com). There is trouble in
paradise. Mike (a lesbian introduced last week in "Dykes Crossing") and
Our Hero (the lad who has performed the honors of impregnating Pat)
appear to be in direct competition - vying for Pat's attention and
affection. Julie (Pat's younger but equally lascivious sister) suggests
a solution: a joint emboikment, with Our Hero filling Pat's anal cavity
while Mike works the front side. Will the dyke and the hetboy work out
their hostilities and become friends? Will Pat feel exploited by this
competition among her suitors? And to what activity or abstract concept
does the title refer? You can probably guess the answers, but you
should read the story to see what the author has to say.
Ratings for "Friction"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 9
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9
* "Exchange Program" by Clint Quinn (A+ Story). Classic science fiction
is a tough genre in which to cast believable murder mysteries and erotic
romances. (We're talking about "strange new worlds" here, not
cyberpunk.) Asimov managed mysteries and this author does a very
creditable job with erotica.
Alain has gotten fed up with academic politics on Earth and emigrates to
the idyllic pioneer planet of New Ontario (which leads me to suspect the
author is Canadian . . .). Just as he arrives at his destination, his
sister, Claudine, possessor of a legendary libido, is headed out to the
world of Welnaria for a month. Her Welnarian exchange is Kera, a
slightly modified human woman who appears to be an adolescent but is
actually an acutely formal forty-plus years of age. The Welnarians have
given up sex-for-pleasure in exchange for reproductive control; they now
assume themselves to be irretrievably "numbed," as Kera puts it. But we
know better, don't we?
Mr. Quinn has a very smooth style and succeeds in evoking the energetic,
liberated personality of a society made up largely of disgusted self-
exiles for whom Earth no longer offers opportunities. (Alain's new best
friend is Grigor, a Russian quantum- mechanic-turned-tractor-mechanic.)
He also handles semi-alien sex very nicely, . . . though I would like to
know just what Kera is saying when, in the throes of passion, she
exclaims "Oss novit capetla!"
The author also knows his grammar and can use a dictionary. He even
knows that "lay" is the proper past tense of the intransitive verb "to
lie" -- a knowledge I wish were shared by more posters. However, he
seems not to realize that in dialogue, only one item of punctuation is
needed to close a quote: A comma alone will do, but not a comma with a
period, exclamation, or question mark. (Really a minor error,
considering his obvious skill, but a reviewer has to find _something_ to
pick on.)
This is one of Ray Velez's reposted "A+ Stories," originally posted in
1995. DejaNews shows only one other (non-sf) erotic story posted by this
author, which is a shame; New Ontario is a promising setting for more
stories of this quality.
Ratings for "Exchange Program"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Smith (appeal to reviewer): 10