Celestial Reviews 6 - July 26. 1995 - by Celeste "Violet Rose" by Ann Douglas (hot ff encounter) 10 "JHNS: Junior High Neighborhood Sluts" by James Wellington (Mf sex with very young girls) 9 "Why?" by Julie (Gentle Romance) 5 "Her End of the Business" by Sir Glans (fantasy enactment)6 "Thumper" by Dave Read (sex between drunks) 3.5 "Midday Intrusion" by Howie Wyrick (outdoor romance) 3 "Small Town Girl" by HotelAlfa. (teen sex in small town) 5 "Craftsmanship" by Sue. (blowing the glass blower) 10 "In Control" by Jennie Bell (female dominance) 5 "Sooo Sweet" by Vickie Tern. (Transgender) 9 "Piss Mom" by Unknown Author (urine and incest) 2.5 "Violet Rose" by Ann Douglas. What Ann Douglas does especially well is set a mood and build anticipation. I have never made love to a woman in real life, and I don't intend to do so; but I *know* this is a realistic description of how it would be. I can almost *remember* this happening to me! The story takes a while to get started (but it builds anticipation while doing so), but then the sex is really hot. An excellent story. (Rating: 10) "Junior High Neighborhood Sluts" by James Wellington (The Teacher). I'm going to be really honest here, and I hope you will respond to my review with equal honesty. I decided to read this story because one of my readers asked me for my opinion about this author. I have read only one chapter so far. In fact, I downloaded just one, because I assumed it would be illiterate trash and that I would not want to read more than one chapter. I cannot tell you how desperately I wanted this to be illiterate trash. But it's not. As I neared the end of the first chapter, I realized (much to my chagrin) that I was reading a well written narrative that made me understand the feelings of the narrator and of the young girl he was teaching about sex - at least, as the author wanted to picture them. But I felt bad inside about the grudging respect I was giving this story. I knew the stuff the protagonist was doing was wrong. (I know some of you are going to accuse me of moralizing. What *I* think I am doing is discussing the character development and societal implications of a well written story. If I can discuss Macbeth's character and motives and decide that he has personality problems that influence my interpretation of the story, I can do the same in a good a.s.s. review. And if I don't have to assassinate a king or become a tyrant to understand Macbeth, then I don't have to relish the thought of a grown man having sex with me as a child in order to comment on these aspects of this story.) As I read this first chapter, it became clear to me that it would be *plausible* that people could develop to maturity and that a society could function effectively if cute little girls were initiated into sexual rites by friendly adults who wanted to gratify themselves without doing any harm to the youngsters. My understanding is that there are exotic islands somewhere in the world where the initiation rites for young girls and boys work pretty much that way - at least they did until the Western missionaries got to them. On the other hand, literally every single child that I have ever personally known who was introduced to sex by a "friendly" adult in the neighborhood has had problems with subsequent sexual development. Anyhow, the story has gotten my attention. And the author is doing a good enough job to convince me that maybe it would have been fun as a kid to learn about sex this way. I'm not saying that I *wish* something like this had happened to me - just that I can see the point in it. That's a mark of a good story, I think. On the other hand, it's also the mark of a dangerous story. I would hate to think that lots of little kids are eating this story up, deciding that maybe they should go find a nice man in the neighborhood who will teach them about sex if they suck his cock real nice. This would be a really dumb idea. But, of course, The Teacher has a disclaimer telling those kids not to read this story. Of course, what the protagonist is doing is against the law. He would be arrested if the police found out he was doing things like this, and not even the inmates in the prison would be nice to him. That's true; but lots of illegal things are still interesting to think about. Someone could argue that that's just a good reason to leave this in fantasy, rather than in practice. Then, of course, there's the title: "Junior High Neighborhood Sluts." What thrills are in store for us? I'll read some more chapters and let you know. So far, I can tell you that I expected illiterate, mindless trash and have discovered that it's not illiterate and mindless. (Rating: 9) "Why?" by Julie. I like stories that don't just follow one of the many sexual formulas for love and sex that show up so often in a.s.s. stories. Julie departs from the stereotypical formulas, and I like that. However, the remaining problem is that I think there is more to the story in Julie's mind than she wrote down to share with us. I am left with too many unanswered questions at the end of the story. Most obviously, who is this guy? Why is she in love with him, if she has never met him? Is he someone she met on the Internet? Is he a famous sports star? Is he the cousin of the best man at her best friend's wedding? I think in her own mind Julie has answers to questions like this, but she just forgot to tell us. The answers would make the story more interesting. (Rating: 5) "Her End of the Business" by Sir Glans. The boss gets high having his lover (an employee) tell him about a previous sexual experience before acting it out with her. Well written stuff. She has job security as long as she can keep coming up with stories - like "1001 Arabian Knights." (Rating: 6) "Thumper" by Dave Read. A college guy is assigned to babysit for his sister, whom he lets throw a party. He joins in the drinking game (Thumper), gets plastered, and screws one of the virgin cuties, who concludes that she likes his brand of Thumper better. To make the sex even hotter, she's under age and he's not; and her girl friends gather outside the bedroom door and giggle! A college guy doing the wild thing with a high school girl while they're both drunk may be realistic, but it's hardly creative. This one did not hold my attention. (Rating: 3.5) "Midday Intrusion" by Howie Wyrick The rating for this story would skyrocket if the writer would simply take time to do something more than run the spellcheck. The story is full of obviously inappropriate (but correctly spelled) words. For example, the guy "completely emerges his cock into Christine." How would one do this? Is the author making an interesting point, or did he mean to say "immersed"? In addition, the verb tenses jump all over the place, and constructions are just not parallel. I had to work too hard getting the images the writer wanted to convey. Secondly, while the idea of the mystery lover in the woods is nice, I think there should be a little more realism to it. As I understand it, the woman goes out to the woods, lies completely naked in an exposed area, is initially perturbed when a passerby rapes her, is pleasantly surprised to find that the rapist is gentle and sweet, enjoys sexual rhapsody with the mystery man, removes the gag and blindfold, and then nods off to blissful sleep. The story line isn't really as silly as I made it sound in the last sentence; but it would be nice to have some development of the rationale for some of this. Sue's "Slippery When Wet" offers an interesting contrast: in that story a guy and girl decide to make love in a jacuzzi after the fitness center is closed, are surprised by some other people, and have wild and spontaneous sex with them. On the surface, both stories are equally improbable; but Sue builds up a rationale that makes the reader think this could really happen to her (or him). (Ann Douglas's "Violet Rose," reviewed earlier in this article, is another example of a highly improbable fantasy that the author makes not only believable but actually vivid. Sue's "Craftsmanship," reviewed later, is another good example.) The author of the present story should not abandon his writing career; he should just be a little more patient and iron out some problems before rushing to press. (Rating: 3) "Small Town Girl" by HotelAlfa. A high school girls has erotic fantasies about getting laid by a sexy teacher. Then, right there in the town's drug store, she makes brief but passionate love to the local pharmacist, who happens to be the husband of the much hated French teacher, who is not woman enough to satisfy him. The thoughts and fantasies are realistic, but the sex with the pharmacist is full of cliches: "I can feel it, I can feel it, it's amazing," Wendy gasped. "Oh, me too, I'm coming, yes, yes, oh, Mark, fuck me, oh, God, oh, God, oh yes, fuck meee..." Wave after wave of hot throbbing pleasure came over her, tears in her eyes from the intensity of the experience. Here's a rarity: Hot and hard, Mark pumped her, stretched her twat with every stroke, she moaning, he grunting. You don't see a nominative absolute used correctly on a.s.s just everyday! (Rating: 5) "Craftsmanship" by Sue. I always save Sue's stories for a time when I'll have time to relish and enjoy her imagery. The writers of many of the previous stories could benefit from reading and imitating Sue's style. (They could also use the occasion for some private foreplay.) In this story Sue makes passionate love to the glass blower, after she (literally) blows a phallus that he later uses to ravage her cunt. Actually, Sue says it better than I did. If you analyze them really carefully, Sue's fantasies probably would make no more sense in real life than those in the previous stories. After all, what sensible girl would want to watch a muscular young man engaged in his trade, then seduce him by having him help her blow and shape a glass phallus, then have him insert that still warm phallus into her well-primed most private parts, then be driven completely out of her mind by a blazing hot orgasm when he inserts the real thing, then suck his gorgeous cock that seems to fit so well into the environs of this shop surrounded by erotic art that her lover has himself produced until he explodes into a gigantic orgasm that she cannot contain? Or what red-blooded guy would take delight in being used in this way by a lewd and lascivious woman, interested in driving her partner into a state of raging ecstasy only because she thinks that he will respond in a way that will contribute to her own self-gratification? For that matter, who would even want to read about such things? Probably only people like those befuddled readers who are tempted right now to cast this review into temporary electronic oblivion and go find this hot, sexy story. But somehow, Sue manages to use words and give rationales that make it all seem worth fantasizing about. (Rating: 10) "In Control" by Jennie Bell. A woman goes for a drive with a friend who wants her to dominate him sexually. She lets him eat her out, even though another guy's cum is oozing from her cunt. He enjoys it and wants to do it again some time. This is not a bad story; but it lacks atmosphere or anticipation or something. I personally think what happens in this story is pretty gross, but I'm sure lots of people would find the activity interesting. Even so, the story would benefit from answering some unanswered questions. I mean, assuming that it's fun to go for a ride with an emotionally stressed friend who has major psychological problems and humiliate him while he has sex with you, wouldn't it at least be nice to know something about their relationship? What the author should do is read Sue's "Craftsmanship," which is reviewed right before this story, and try to imitate some of the strategies Sue uses to present a full story rather than an interesting snippet of a story. (Rating: 5) "Sooo Sweet" by Vickie Tern. This is a story of an extremely unusual little lady married to an equally unusual little man who is telling a really unusual story as if it were the most natural thing in the world. The story is narrated by a beautician to her customers, and her babbling monologue helps maintain a fascinating mood for the story." The surprises and sudden turns in the plot are what make this a good story. My own reaction was predominantly one of humor. "OK... I guess that could work...." I really can't tell you much about the actual story, because advance knowledge of the plot would ruin it for you. This is a TG (Transgender) story; and so people not at all interested in that genre may not want to read this rather lengthy story. However, I myself normally do not tune in to TG stories. I read this one only because the author sent me an advance copy; but I found this story to be quite interesting. The TG lifestyle is definitely not for me or my husband; but this story was still fun for me to read. Here's a technical note. This story (like many other good stories) depends on logical sequencing of ideas and appropriate formatting of text. If your service is like mine, in many cases when you download a document from a.s.s., you get a manuscript on your screen with a ragged appearance. The tab stops are gone, there are paragraph markers at the end of each line, and lines sometimes seem to end in the middle of the page for no good reason. Although it is still possible to read the text under these circumstances, it is often distracting to do so and difficult to pick up the logic of the text. The easiest way to solve this problem is to transfer the story to your word processor and change the document margins. If necessary, you can also change the font style and/or size. By doing this, you can get the document to look pretty much like the author thought it would look; and this often makes it easier to understand and enjoy the story. (Rating: 9) Repost Reviews (Whenever I spot a repost of a story that I've already reviewed, I'll try to repost the review. ) "Piss Mom" by Unknown Author. Peggy is a divorced mother who has to take a leak in the garden. Since she suddenly realizes that her young son is hanging out the window watching her and since the sensation of urinating in the great outdoors is already turning her on, she has a resounding orgasm while little Johnny watches in admiration. When Peggy goes into the house to confront her son about the incident, she finds him masturbating; and so, naturally, she gives him a hand job. Morally confused, she takes a hot bath; but when she gets out of the tub she finds Johnny sucking on her panties, which are full of the scent of her recent orgasm. She joins him in this occupation; but when he asks to see her naked cunt (which he has already seen in the garden a few minutes earlier), Peggy's conscience won't permit this; and so she encourages him to cuddle up to her naked ass instead. And so it goes.... With a title like this, you'd think the story couldn't miss; but it falls short of greatness It was a multipart story, and somehow I got only the first part. But don't bother sending me the rest, unless the plot takes a dramatic shift. The main reason I'm mentioning it in this review at all is because this story shows clear signs of being *digitally scanned* from a published manuscript. (I've learned to recognize this, because some of my students have tried to plagiarize in this way.) I think the reason the person who posted this "doesn't know who wrote it" is because the cover was torn off - the way the bookstores do when they get refunds on cheap paperbacks they can't sell. What kind of person is this? Senators Exon and Dole had me expecting good clean perverts; but whoever posted this doesn't even respect the copyright law! (Rating 2.5)