I stood alone before the ornate gates of Croix Hill, my eyes sliding resentfully over the sprawling, impressive building which would be my home for the next two years. I hesitated before pressing the buzzer which would bring someone to admit me to this elegant prison. It was a prison, for all its enormous tuition fee, for all my aunt's attempts to convince me I was lucky to be accepted by this exclusive school for girls. I glanced quickly at the dirt road which led up to the gate. Aunt Louise's new Jaguar was nothing more than a gleaming black bug in the distance, raising clouds of red-brown earth in its wake.
At least I'd won that victory--I'd refused to be admitted officially to the school with my aunt standing by, like a kindergarten mother or a prison matron. If I had to go to this damn school I'd at least look like something other than a dumb animal being led to the slaughter house. Then I had to laugh. Big victory! I looked around at the purple and green mountains which would soon be capped with ice and snow. They hemmed me and the school in on ail sides. Gigantic trees blocked off everything except the road and the school. Besides, I already knew Croix Hill was stuck in the middle of nowhere. The closest way out was down that road where a tiny town nestled in the lap of the mountains twenty-three miles away. Without a car I might just as well already be behind the gates. There was no place to run.
A perfect spot for a prison, I thought, by any name.
Sure, I was bitter. I had plenty of reason to be bitter. I was acutely aware of all I was giving up by coming to this sugar-coated dump. I thought of Gary and unconsciously my hand went to my breasts. The tips were hard from the stinging cold which penetrated my warm sweater and buckskin jacket. They got harder still as I remembered the night before.
I'd sneaked out of the house to say goodbye to Gary. Aunt Louise didn't know Gary existed, of course, but she knew me well enough to know that whenever I was gone there was likely to be a male somewhere in the picture. I wasn't the type to sneak out to see a girl friend. He was waiting down the street in his ancient Ford.
"How did it go?" he asked as soon as I got in. Gary knew I'd made my last-minute attempt to escape the inevitable.
I made a thumbs-down gesture. "I don't want to talk about it. This might be the last time we see each other for a long time, Gary. Let's go somewhere and make the most of it, okay?"
But Gary was too concerned for once to even think about sex. I stopped his verbal assault on my aunt with a kiss. My hand slipped between his muscular thighs and patted the bulge there. I was tense and my frustration, as always, transferred itself into a throbbing urgency in my cunt. "Look, I need it bad. Let's talk later, huh?" I squeezed him gently and felt his heavy prick begin to respond. It was late at night and I didn't want to wait until we found a motel which wasn't too fussy. Gary was only nineteen and though I looked older than sixteen the fuzz in Santa Monica kept a pretty close eye on the local motels. "Just find us some dark street. Anyplace," I moaned, already tugging at Gary's pants zipper. This was one of those times when I had to have it and now!
As soon as I felt Gary's naked cock in my hand I began to shake all over. We had been lovers for over a month now, and still we clawed at each other every chance we got. He was rock hard already, and I felt a drop of moisture spring from the head of his long prick as I expertly aroused him still further with my hot hand.
"Wait, baby," Gary pleaded, unable to concentrate on his driving. But one of his hands left the wheel and fell to my lap. I always wore the shortest, tightest skirts I could get into, and this time I didn't bother to wear panties underneath. He rubbed the insides of my smooth thighs. Then his fingers touched the fringe of hairs which dusted my slit like a silky veil.
Gary groaned, looked around and spotted the entrance to our favorite stretch of beach. The cops patrolled most of the beach area continuously at night, but this strip was the least watched. We were both willing to take chances by now. I was so hot I knew I'd have to ask Gary to stop the car and fuck me in the middle of the street if we didn't find a place soon. It was so dark we couldn't see the ocean. Not that we gave a damn. Gary grabbed me and the blanket he kept in the car. We trudged through the damp clammy sand to a reasonably safe spot under the lifeguard station. Gary spread the blanket while I, too excited to wait, stripped off my skirt and lifted up my sweater to expose my naked breasts. Then I fell back on the blanket, thighs spread apart, nude save for the bunched sweater under my neck, my black garter belt, stockings and high heels.
Even after a month of almost constant sex, Gary was still awed by my body. I knew it was a good body, and I was proud of it. My long legs were perfectly shaped, my silky belly was flat and my breasts were firm cones of creamy flesh, big enough to please any man. They were topped with pert pinkish nipples which had hardened to stiff burning points. My face always got me a lot of attention, also, with its slanty, sexy deep brown eyes, ripe mouth and small nose. I kept promising myself I'd lighten my long brown hair, but I hated to tamper with its glossy beauty.
Gary just stared at me for a moment, kneeling over me, with his white, lightly veined prick sticking out of his pants. I knew how I looked to him then. The bit of moonlight which got through the fog frosted my nakedness in the darkness, adding a gleam to my nylons, making my brown-haired cunt little more than a smudge on my belly. But I wanted more than his eyes on me. I reached up and tugged his pants down to his knees. I grasped his big balls in one hand, squeezing gently, softly urging him to me.
"Patti!" Gary came to life then, falling on me, his boyish lips, very full and soft, closing over one of my waiting nipples.
Unable to stand another moment of delay, I closed my fingers over his throbbing cock and brought the head of it to my cunt. It was wet and hungry, needing his hugeness inside it, filling me to the hilt, driving my depression away to the fringes of my mind with his pistonlike movements.
"Fuck me good, Gary, darling," I crooned into his ear, the excitement making my voice thick. I watched him suck my nipples hard as he eased himself into me. "Give it to me good. Make me feel it... remember it for a long time." Then his cock was all the way in, stretching the tight velvety walls of my cunt. It was pure pleasure, devoid of pain. His prick was like an extension of myself, making me at last complete.
Gary muttered unintelligibly as he rammed his pulsating length into me. He loved burying himself in my cunt. The fury of his thrusting hips told me how much he would miss me.
I came quickly, more quickly than ever before, as if I had to make every minute, every thrust count. I raked my long fingernails over the flesh of his ass as I came, tightening my heels into the backs of his legs. It took only seconds until I was ready again. This time I swung my legs around Gary's waist as the explosion hit me.
Gary was good. Very good. He held his tense body still as I quickly recovered from my second orgasm. I could tell by the way his body trembled, by the swollenness of him inside me that it took every bit of effort to keep from coming.
I wanted it to be good for him, too. I wanted to make sure Gary didn't forget me. I slid my legs off him and brought them together under his, making my wet slit tight around his cock. "Come with me this time, Gary," I moaned, wanting to feel him spurt his hot thick juices into my womb. "I want you to come inside me.
"Yes. Now!" he cried out, his longish sandy hair falling over his damp forehead. "I--I can't keep it back any longer." Then his lips mashed against mine and his tongue dug into my mouth as he shot his boiling load into my hole. I came again as I felt the steaming juice spray my in-sides.
Afterwards, with our clothing in place again and our arms keeping each other warm, I told him of my talk with my aunt. It had been a joke, and the laugh was on me. Did I really think I could change her mind?
I'd lived with my aunt and uncle since my mother died when I was ten. My father, who I didn't remember, had disappeared when I was four. Uncle Norm was my father's only brother, and why he and Aunt Louise agreed to take me in after Mom died I'll never know. They didn't have any kids of their own--by choice. They didn't like kids and I was no exception.
Uncle Norm was older than his wife by fifteen years or so, and I never understood why they had gotten married in the first place. He was a quiet, mousey type of man who kept to himself as much as possible. He barely spoke td me or Aunt Louise ail the time I lived with them, and the few times he did, I wished he hadn't. If my father was anything like Uncle Norm I was just as glad I didn't remember him.
Aunt Louise was anything but quiet. She was one of those women who were plain as girls but somehow got better looking as they aged. She had dyed red hair, a too-red mouth and a damn good body. When I was a kid she'd take me shopping or for walks with her, and I remember the looks she got from strange men in cars. She had a way of walking, her big ass rolling slightly, that got her a lot of attention. She loved it. But when I got a little older and started filling out she began to notice that most of the stares from the strangers were for me. That's when she insisted we no longer go out together unless it was absolutely necessary.
That suited me just fine. I hated those walks.
I used to live in dread of meeting one of my friends when I was out with her. Aunt Louise had been poor most of her life, yet she always felt she was too good for everyone else. And she didn't fail to let others know how she felt. If we'd run into one of my friends, her way of looking down at them with this faint air of disapproval embarrassed me more than I can say. She was always after me to make some "decent friends." The ones she thought were good enough to associate with a member of her family were the small group of rich kids who went to my school, and they wanted to have as little to do with me as I with them. It was like Aunt Louise was in training to get rich all her life, and no one was more surprised than me and less than she when she did.
It had happened suddenly eight months before. She and Uncle Norm were in a brand new department store when a section of the ceiling caved in, injuring Aunt Louise and three others and killing Uncle Norm instantly. The three others signed releases or something, accepting what seemed like generous amounts from the store, but Aunt Louise screamed and carried on so that when the case was finally settled, she was a rich woman. It was like she had at last received her due. She was content, and I think, more than a little relieved to be rid of Uncle Norm.
Since then she had bloomed. She bought clothing like mad and decided abruptly to take an extended vacation in Europe. Another change was that the admiring strangers were strangers no longer. Hardly a day passed when Aunt Louise didn't bring home a new man, introducing him grandly to me as if he were about to become my new uncle. The whole bit disgusted me. Not the men, because I'd been digging on men since I was twelve passively and fourteen actively.
It was her attitude which irritated me, as if everything were so proper, so Emily Post. Did she think I was unaware of the sounds of love-making that began to come from her bedroom almost nightly? I would have laughed in her face, but I didn't. I knew from the first that there was going to be trouble, and I wasn't eager to kick it off. It was right after when Aunt Louise got her new car that I felt it start. She began to take more and more notice of the way the men she brought home looked at me. They talked to her, but their eyes hardly ever left my ripe little body. Aunt Louise didn't like that at all.
It wasn't long afterwards when she told me I was going to Croix Hill, a fantastically expensive and unique private school in the mountains. I'd never heard of it, but Aunt Louise said it was very exclusive--the school didn't even advertise, word of it was passed mouth to mouth, and it specialized in girls who were problems. I'd reacted to that dig, but Aunt Louise merely shrugged. She simply said the whole thing was arranged, I was going, and that was that. And she was going off to have a blast in Europe!
"It's hardly a reform school or a nunnery, Patti. It's a very modern, up-to-date school run by a lovely woman. You'll meet some fine young friends and learn to be a lady. Miss Deloffre believes in giving girls what she calls a most liberal education and preparing her students to become proper adults and able wives. There's nothing stuffy or old-fashioned about Miss Deloffre or Croix Hill."
The thought of being locked away in an all-girl school for a couple of years made me want to kill her. Away from my friends, deprived of my freedom... deprived of Gary.
"I won't go! I just won't go!" I'd said again, before sneaking out to meet Gary. I'd tried everything in the past few weeks, and this was my final attempt. My aunt looked down at her long red fingertips and smiled slightly. Her heavily lipsticked mouth was full, swollen-lipped from the lovemaking which had disturbed my sleep in the next room all night long. "Won't you?" she inquired coolly.
I tried a different tact. "Look, Aunt Louise," I began, forcing the defiance from my voice, "it's not fair. You're asking me to... "
"I'm not asking you to anything, Patti. I'm telling you. There is a difference." She looked like a supremely content lioness with her flaming hair and sure manner. Why shouldn't she-she had gotten rid of her husband, had come into a fortune in doing so, and now was about to get rid of her niece.
I got mad all over again. Damn the bitch! "Well, I'm not going. You can do whatever you like. I'm not going!"
She laughed, a silky drawn-out laugh. "Darling Patti. Perhaps you've forgotten. I'm your legal guardian. You're still underage. I've had a most informative talk with your principal. She says you're--what do they call it--oh, yes, incorrigible. Do you realize I could have you put in a juvenile hall right now? Well, I could. It would be a great deal less expensive and a whole lot less pleasant for you."
"You couldn't!" But I wasn't so sure. My ditching school alone was so bad I'd flunked a grade. I began to go cold all over.
"Couldn't I? Do you know it takes only a few recommendations to get you there? Your principal would be more than happy to give one."
I didn't doubt that a bit. I'd been caught smoking on campus just the week before, and old Mrs. Evans had read me the riot act. I'd told the old bitch to go fuck herself. After she had lost the blotchy purple in her fat cheeks she'd suspended me again and sent for Aunt Louise.
"Besides," she purred, "I did a little inquiring and discovered that a simple virginity test can get a girl your age into juvenile hall if the results are negative."
She didn't have to say any more. I knew when I was licked. I excused myself and went to my room, waiting fully dressed under the blankets until Aunt Louise was asleep. Then I'd slipped out to meet Gary.
"You could split," he suggested, after I'd related the scene to him. "Maybe you should."
Tiredly, I shook my head. The sand felt even colder now. I kissed him softly on his stubbly cheek. "That would be even worse. If they caught me I'd be sent away for sure. If I'm going to run away it would be a whole lot better to do it after I was in the school, when Aunt Louise is already in Europe. She wouldn't be in a big hurry to come back to this country to find me."
"I guess you're right." Gary put his arms around me again. "I'm not sure I can do without you for even a couple of days, though. I... I love you, Patti."
His words made me feel better. I never knew with men, never knew if their concern was for me or for the hot opening between my thighs. He'd never told me he loved me before. I liked him a lot, and I knew I loved his loving, but I wasn't sure I really knew what love was. I hadn't seen a hell of a lot of it.
"Look, Gary," I said finally, "only one thing worries me . ., This place sounds more like a jail than a school. It's out in the middle of nowhere. Aunt Louise is leaving for Europe two weeks after I start school. I'd like to run away a week or so after that. I figure I could hide out in that hippie commune in North Hollywood until the heat's off. But without a car I don't know if it's possible to get away. Would you help me?"
"How, baby?"
"I'll write you a letter, just some stupid little harmless note in case they check the mail. In it I'll mention a day and a time. Can you drive up to the school then and meet me on the grounds somewhere?"
Gary hesitated. I knew he was thinking of school. He was going to college on a scholarship and couldn't afford to get in trouble. Helping a minor run away might be trouble in a big way. At that point I didn't give a damn. I might need help and I figured Gary owed me that much. I dropped my hand to his fly and rubbed gently again. I knew how to get to him.
"Patti... " he whispered, his hand going to my sweater. I played with his zipper, feeling him get hard again. I knew what he wanted. He had asked me to do it to him many times. I never had before, but now I needed something more than sex. I needed his cooperation. I let him unzip his fly and urge my head down to his lap. "Please... this once."
His cock was inches from my lips, stiff and ready again. I kissed the head quickly, then let my tongue play lightly against it. "Will you help me?" I asked, my mouth still near his prick.
"What? Yes, sure, Patti. You know I will. Put it in your mouth, baby. Suck on it for me."
I smiled. Gary would never go back on his word. It was a thing with him. But then, neither would I, if I could help it. A deal was a deal. I bent to his cock again. The skin was very soft. As I began to suck it slowly into my mouth I felt it grow even harder. Gagging slightly, I let him work his big prick into my throat. Surprisingly, the sensation wasn't at all unpleasant. It filled my mouth the same way it filled my cunt--completely. I could feel it throbbing inside me.
"Jesus, Patti!" Gary groaned. "That's so good."
He began thrusting it faster and deeper down my throat. A dull ache began in my groin. Just then, sensing it, Gary reached down and put his hand up my skirt. His fingers toyed with my cunt, spreading it, digging his fingers into me, finding, at last, my stiff little clitoris. I spread my thighs as far as I could, letting the tight skirt bite into my flesh. I was hot again, pulsating with need. Now his cock was a welcome invader, jerking itself in and out of my mouth. I used my tongue on it, licking at the pounding flesh as his fingers aroused me till I knew I'd come in his hand.
"Take it, baby... I'm going to come. Take it!" His voice was agonized as he ripped into my throat in one powerful lunge, shooting his load in rapid little spurts. The thick salty cream filled my mouth and his big cock, throbbing wildly in me, forced me to swallow every drop. I sucked even harder as he came, grasping his balls in one hand as I felt myself convulse in still another orgasm. I wrenched my hips, taking his fingers in me as far as they would go as the spasms shook my body.
Shortly after, Gary dropped me off a block from my house. We made quick plans based on the letter I would send him, and I silently let myself into the house, feeling much better. Instead of filling my mind with the horrors of two years locked behind the walls of some girls' school I fell asleep thinking of the wonderful life I'd have once I was on my own.
Now, staring at the solid impregnability of Croix Hill, I wasn't so sure. Already Gary seemed like something out of the remote past. The desolateness of the area made me shiver. Feeling exactly as if I were sealing my own doom, I reached up and pressed the buzzer.
CHAPTER TWO
"Yes, Patti, Croix Hill is a most unusual school." Joycelyn Deloffre looked at me steadily from beneath finely-arched black eyebrows. She glanced down at her desk. I could read 'Patti Holland/Personal History' from where I sat across from her, but couldn't make out anything inside the folder.
My aunt had told me Joycelyn Deloffre was an attractive woman. But she was more. She was the most beautiful creature I'd ever seen. She looked like a queen out of some exotic storybook. Her throne was a hand-carved ebony chair which framed her face, shoulders, and breasts perfectly. Somewhere in her thirties, Miss Deloffre had coal-black hair caught up in a rather severe bun which only emphasized the magnificence of her features. Her eyes slanted. The pupils were impossibly green, like the depths of the ocean, and I found it difficult to tear my eyes away from them. Her skin was very pale, almost luminous and unblemished. Her straight nose had a chiseled appearance, and her mouth was full and naturally coral. Her high cheekbones made her look part Indian. Her neck appeared even longer than it was by the deep plunge of her suit jacket which revealed a slice of creamy cleavage. Her breasts, under the fitted jacket, were high and full, and somehow I knew the rest of her was as perfectly proportioned.
In spite of myself, I was impressed with the headmistress of Croix Hill.
An older woman dressed in a severely tailored suit had met me at the gate, long minutes after I'd rung the buzzer. She had taken my name, glanced at me as if I were a new horse the school had bought sight unseen, then, nodding approval, escorted me into the building. As we walked, my bitterness had increased. The silent woman at my side looked like the prototype of all the stem-faced matrons I'd ever seen or envisioned. It looked like a great future!
The interior of the school was like something out of a movie set. Great crystal chandeliers lined the high-beamed ceilings. The plush carpet that completely absorbed the sound of our steps was the color of fresh blood. Massive paintings on either side of the hallway looked strikingly authentic. I half-expected Arthur Treacher to pop out of a doorway in cutaway, droning "You rang, madam?" followed on the heels by Peter Lorre rubbing his hands together.
We had stopped before a great oak door. The woman knocked softly, then she pushed open the door. My first look inside the room made me forget my bitterness. Suddenly all I felt was awe. I'd never seen anything so beautiful as that office, and even its beauty was dimmed by the elegance of the dark-haired woman seated behind the huge desk.
I tried not to reveal how impressed I was. I had to remember that this woman was my jailer. "Unusual? I wouldn't know," I finally answered, coldly. "I've gone to public schools all my life." I made my voice obviously sarcastic. "This rich bit is new to me." I wanted her to know that my aunt's "lady" act was a put-on.
Miss Deloffre smiled slightly. "Well, you certainly are trying to live up the personality profile your aunt supplied." She glanced again at the paper in her long-fingered ivory hand. "But I'm neither alarmed nor startled, Patti. All of our girls are considered problem children by their families. That's one reason they are sent to me. They cease to be problems after a short time at Croix Hill. I see to that. That's one reason why all of our girls are more or less permanent residents at the school. We do not allow home influences to disturb the pattern of our training program. Of course most of the girls' parents, like your aunt, find it impossible to spend much time with their children. So it works out very well for all concerned. I understand your aunt is planning a move to Europe?"
"Yeah." The polished quality of the woman's voice irritated me. I worked at sounding like something out of the lower east side of New York. Maybe she'd think I was too low-class for her school and kick me out. "She's planning to go fuck everything on that continent. She's gone through all the available studs here, I guess." I felt kind of embarrassed then, knowing I was sounding more like a wild-talking kid, trying to shock the big lady.
Miss Deloffre only stared back at me, obviously unruffled by my words. Her voice, when she did speak, had the faintest overtones of amusement. "Well, variety is important to most people, Patti." Then she became very businesslike. "At any rate, you no longer have to deal with your aunt in any way. I am in control here... in absolute control. We have thirty-seven students here including you, and you will soon discover that my word is law. I allow no disobedience. Is that understood?"
Her eyes had a way of needling mine that stripped away my years, making me feel like an awkward little kid. Now I knew I disliked this woman. I was more convinced than ever that I'd been dumped in a classy reform school. Still, I found myself docilely mumbling, "I understand."
"I'm sure it won't take you long to catch on to our little ways here. Barbara will show you around the school now. Your luggage has been sent to your room. I'd suggest you make an effort to be pleasant to Barbara. She's one of our oldest girls and a great help to me." Then the woman lifted a small phone and paged Barbara Crowell.
I sat back in my chair and contemplated my fingernails as I waited for the headmistress' pet to show up. I didn't want to pay any more attention to Miss Deloffre than absolutely necessary. She'd soon find out I wasn't about to be broken in like a dumb horse or something. Besides, I was kind of afraid that if I looked at her much longer she'd be able to see how impressed I was with her in spite of my hostile attitude.
"Come in, Barbara." Miss Deloffre called in answer to a discreet knock on the door.
A tall, boyish blonde entered the office. She looked curiously at me, then smiled broadly at the woman. "The new one, huh?"
After the introductions were made I followed Barbara into the hallway. I glared at her shapely back in the trim blouse and skirt, surprised at finding myself vaguely annoyed by the easy familiarity between Barbara and Miss Deloffre.
"Okay, Patti, now for the grand tour." Barbara's blue eyes scanned my body with quick interest. Again I had the strange feeling that I was a new piece of meat, about to become tomorrow's main course.
Barbara didn't talk much as she took me through the fabulous rooms. She acted like the school was her personal possession. As if I was lucky just to be a part of it. One wing, the academic section, was a maze of classrooms where the teachers--all women as far as I could tell--and the students--only four or five per class--glanced at me curiously as we passed.
A bell rang as Barbara was showing me the gym and the Olympic-sized swimming pool downstairs. Girls began moving around the hallways carrying books and giggling just like high school girls anywhere. They all seemed exceptionally pretty, with groovy bodies. Not knowing yet if they were going to be my allies or my enemies, I kept my cool as Barbara introduced me around.
As we walked up to the second floor we passed two girl? on the stairway. One, about seventeen, was glaring at a girl of no more than fifteen who had obviously just dropped a handful of textbooks. "Pick them up, slave," the older girl ordered coldly. When the younger one bent down to obey, the older girl delivered a stinging slap on the other's rounded ass. I was surprised. The younger girl merely rubbed her cute butt and gathered up the books. Then, without a word, she followed the older girl up the stairs, the books filling her arms.
"Sisters... or what?" I asked Barbara curiously, wondering why the younger girl didn't slap her back, or at least tell the other to go to hell.
"That's right," she smiled smugly. "... Or what." She seemed suddenly evasive, pointing out something about one of the paintings as we resumed the tour. I got the feeling that she was laughing at me... as if she considered me a little kid with plenty to learn about the ways of the world.
My room was awfully attractive for a prison. There was a large bed, a huge chest of drawers, a study desk and comfortable chair. In addition, there was a thick rug and more of the expensive looking paintings. A closet covered one of the walls, next to which hung a beautiful cracked-glass mirror.
My trunk and suitcases were next to the desk. Aunt Louise had been more than generous about getting me clothes. At least Croix Hill wasn't one of those places where everybody wore tacky uniforms. I didn't kid myself that Aunt Louise had shelled out a fortune in clothes just to please me. Even if she wasn't going to be around, she was at least going to impress everyone with how rich the Hollands were.
"You can start unpacking now while I give you a run-down on this place," Barbara said, easing her firm rear onto my bed. She watched silently as I opened the trunk and started taking out my stuff. Then, after nodding approvingly at some of my short leather and suede skirts, she began to talk.
"The older girls--your age and up--kind of run things around here. Once you're accepted into our group everything's a cinch. The classes are easy if the teacher digs you. The younger girls have to do the dirty jobs. It works out great that way."
It sounded like the standard snob-school pecking order I'd read about, so I merely nodded, managing to look bored. "What's Miss Deloffre like?" I asked.
Barbara smiled. "She's beautiful. But you have to listen to her. She's strict until you know your way around. In fact, you've got to listen to all the teachers and the older girls. This school's heavy on discipline, as you'll find out."
There was something kind of guarded about Barbara's attitude and I was beginning to resent it. I don't like being talked down to. Again I nodded knowingly. I had some girl friends who went to private Catholic schools. The nuns were hot on discipline, too, so I wasn't really surprised. But let anyone come at me with a ruler and they'd get it right back across their own damn knuckles.
"How did you end up in this place, anyway?" I asked in a light conversational tone. Actually I was quite curious.
Barbara flickered some dust off her white blouse, causing her small but nicely shaped breasts to jiggle. I could see she had a nice body. "Oh, my parents live in China. They own these factories over there. I grew up there, but... they aren't really the type to have kids around to cramp their style. I was running with this wild group, and got pregnant. The son-of-a-bitch wouldn't marry me. After the abortion they sent me here. Actually, I'm glad."
After she said this, Barbara seemed more human to me, somehow. She certainly was no square, anyway. Maybe she'd understand. "You live here year round?"
"Sure. Beats going home any day. Here I can do what I want."
"How about men?" I asked, reaching for another hanger.
Barbara shifted on the bed. Her laugh was disdainful. "Fuck 'em."
I smiled. "That's nice, too. Once in a while," I said cautiously. After all, a girl who's been around has to have some kind of sex life. No one was pretending to be a nun-in-training.
Again Barbara laughed. "Later for that. There are other ways of getting your kicks if you're smart." She smiled oddly, then again ran her eyes over my body.
I wondered if Barbara was queer. I had heard that girls' schools always had a few. I started feeling uncomfortable again. I dug males, hairy flat chests and big hard cocks. I didn't have to feel up another girl or play with myself to get my kicks.
"Well, look, Patti, I've got. a few things to take care of now. You'll probably be hours unpacking anyway. I'll stop by later to take you to the dining room for dinner. Okay?"
I nodded and thanked her for the grand tour. After she left the room I grabbed a cigarette and took a break. I thought about my plans to split, reminding myself to put all the stuff I wanted to take with me in a separate section of the dresser so I could pack quickly when it was time. At first I felt relaxed, glad to be alone. Then. I started feeling strange, kind of lonely and locked out of things. My thoughts went to Gary and I wished he was here. That bed sure would beat the sand. The thought of being fucked by him right then excited me terrifically. It would be just the thing to relax my taut nerves. How in hell was I going to hold out through the weeks that remained between me and Gary?
I found some ashtrays in the room and snubbed out my cigarette. At least smoking was allowed in this fancy prison. Then I got up and resumed my unpacking, carefully keeping my eyes off the bed and thoughts of Gary.
Barbara was back just before it got dark. Her timing was perfect. I'd just put away the last suitcase.
"We dress for dinner or what?" I asked, noticing the sexy black dress she was wearing. She had put on some make-up too. She was really a good-looking chick. It was impossible to believe she wasn't getting a little somewhere.
"Why not?" She walked to my closet and scanned the clothes hanging there for a moment. "This will do." She handed me my tight grey dress with the long sleeves.
Shrugging, I took it. It was one of my favorites, but it seemed a waste to wear it here. It was one of those form-fitting jobs that looked as if I was poured into it. It came to barely mid-thigh, and when I'd worn it for Gary once he'd gotten an immediate erection. I waited a moment, expecting her to split while I dressed, but she just made herself at home on my bed, instead.
Shrugging, still feeling a little foolish, I got out of my sweater and skirt. It was funny, but I was never shy about undressing in front of males. Women were something else, though, but I guessed in an all-girls' school you got over those hang-ups. Like being in the army if you were a guy. Privacy and modesty probably gets to be some kind of a joke.
I noticed Barbara's eyes on my body as I stood in front of her, dressed only in panties, bra, a garter belt, and stockings. Let her look, I thought. I've nothing to be ashamed about. I knew my body compared favorably with the best of them. I stood straighter, sticking my big tits out as far as they would go, reaching out for the dress.
"You've got a real crazy body, Patti," she commented, her eyes boldly appraising me.
I tried not to hurry as I got into the dress, wanting to appear comfortable and hip. Again, I caught myself wondering if Barbara was queer. The thought of it really turned me off, starting me in thinking of Gary again. I think any man would have looked good to me right then.
Dinner was great. The food was like something straight out of the Hilton. The huge table was covered with a snowy cloth and the dishes and silver lived up to the thick carpeting and the fabulous furnishings. All the girls ate at one table, with the stern-faced woman who had met me at the gate sitting at the head. She turned out to be a combination bookkeeper and den mother, having very little to do with the girls except for one very young girl who she all but spoon-fed. Another woman was there also, the gym teacher, Mrs. Barry. Mrs. Barry was very slim and wiry, and kind of attractive in an athletic way.
Barbara explained that the other teachers and Miss Deloffre usually ate with the girls, but that there was some special staff meeting that evening. That's why only two women were present.
The girls talked and laughed as we ate, but they seemed somewhat cool when talking to me. Again I got this feeling that I was being observed. Kind of left out of their lives, or something. I was introduced around, but soon all the names and faces just sort of blended together.
Concentrating mainly on my dinner, I also kept my thoughts on Gary and what we'd do together once I was free. The first thing would be to hit the nearest bed. The throbbing between my legs was going to be an agony by the time I got out, no doubt about that.
After dinner most of the girls went into the game room in the basement to play cards or talk. I escaped back to my room as soon as I could, saying that I had things to put away yet. I really just wanted to be alone and kind of lick my injured feelings. I was missing Gary so bad it hurt. Besides, I figured the rest were going to have a grand time running me down to each other. Why stick around?
I messed around in my room for awhile, then took a long bath in the adjoining John. I tried to blank my mind out completely. Then I got into bed and snapped off the light. Again I thought of Gary, and hugged the pillow to me as if it were him. In minutes, I was asleep.
I woke up suddenly, not sure what was wrong or where I was. I didn't move, trying to figure out what had come over me. It was very dark in the room and I had no idea of the time. I became slowly aware that someone was in my room. Listening intently, my heart pounding madly, I could barely make out the figure of a girl with long hair standing by my bed. Before I could figure out what to say, the girl was easing herself into the bed with me!
Holding my breath, I waited, wondering if this was a trick, or somebody's idea of a joke. I didn't want to come off as some kind of a jerk, so I pretended I was still sleeping. I didn't even recognize the girl. There had been several longhaired blondes at dinner and I couldn't make out this one's face in the dark. After a couple of minutes I thought I felt a hand on my stomach. I froze, still feigning sleep. This just had to be some kind of a joke, but I decided to see it through and made no reaction. Then the girl's hand began moving slowly over my stomach. It really gave me a creepy feeling. The fingers drifted down, barely touching me, until they reached the hiked-up hem of my nightgown. The touch of her skin against mine made me miserably uncomfortable, but I was determined not to make a fool of myself. Faking the deep breathing of a sleeper, I forced my body to relax.
The hand slid under my nightgown now, edging up across my knees to my thighs. My legs were opened, and cursing myself for that, and the fact that I wasn't wearing panties, I tensed again as I felt the fingers caress the insides of my thighs. I wished it was Gary's fingers there. If it had been, I'd have slid my hips forward in an instant, jamming those fingers deep in my cunt with my own. Sometimes when we were at a show or somewhere and couldn't do anything else, we'd get hot and Gary would slip his hand under my skirt and play with the slit the whole time. I just loved that.
But this wasn't Gary. This was some girl I didn't even know! I didn't like it one damn bit, but I could just imagine Barbara and her friends outside the door, listening arid laughing. I couldn't very well start protesting yet. Maybe they were only teasing me, to see if I'd panic out or something. I certainly wasn't going to give them the satisfaction. Not if I could help it. As the prying fingers worked their way dangerously close to my cunt, a wave of revulsion suddenly gripped me. Maybe this was the school queer, checking out the new meat. I wondered. Then I realized the hand was actually on my pussy, stroking it lightly, as if it were some soft little furry animal. I wanted to jerk the hand away, but I was just too stunned to move. The skillful fingers parted the lips of my cunt and I almost fainted when they brushed my clitoris. Gary had been on my mind all day and it seemed like the final indignity to have this strange girl touching what I so desperately wanted Gary to be touching. My flesh went cold as the fingers deliberately teased the little button, then sank lower toward my tight little hole. A slim fingertip penetrated.
I couldn't take it any longer! Sitting up quickly, I knocked the hand away. Blind fury made the outline of the intruder nothing more than a blur in the dark. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" I whispered fiercely.
The girl didn't answer. Instead, she merely pushed her hand onto my cunt again, this time less gently. She might have been deaf or dumb for all her reaction to my anger. She pushed my leg to one side with one hand and dug her finger into me with the other. Again I slapped the hands away from my body. Then I jumped out of bed. In my rage I couldn't remember where the light was. "Get the hell out of my room, whoever you are!" I said between clenched teeth. It was just my damn luck to draw the school lesbian the first night. I had been unwillingly drawn into a card game, thanks to Aunt Louise, and the deck was stacked. "Get out. I'm no damn queer!" I snapped cruelly, not giving a damn if I hurt her feelings.
I could see the girl's silhouette shrug. She still hadn't said a word. I stood against the wall, ready to hit her if she came near me. But she merely walked slowly to the door, not even looking back. I dimly recognized her as one of Barbara's friends just before she closed the door behind her.
I stumbled to the door, snapping the lock. Still angry, I climbed back into bed and tried to get to sleep.
When I finally did sleep, my mind was occupied with a long succession of disturbing dreams. In each of them Gary's--or some man's --hand was between my legs, stabbing my cunt with his long fingers. I was sobbing for more... more... more... knowing I'd never get enough.
CHAPTER THREE
The tingling between my thighs persisted even after my dreams gave way to a deep, unperturbed void. I rubbed a hand lightly over my belly in a futile attempt to stifle my dream-induced excitement even before I was really awake. The morning sun filtered through my closed eyelids, tinting my awareness a dull red. Regretfully, I slowly opened one eye. Barbara was standing over my bed, looking down at me, an unreadable expression on her face. I closed the eye again. I hate mornings. I've never been one of those greet-the-day-with-a-smile types anyway. It always took me a few moments to get my bearings after a night's sleep. I remembered quickly. I was at school. Then I wondered what the hell Barbara was doing in my room. Dimly I recalled another girl... something unpleasant... then full recollection returned and I opened my eyes.
"Good morning," I said, pleasantly enough, really wanting to ask Barbara what the hell she was doing in my room. "Looks like I inherited the local Grand Central Station."
Barbara didn't smile. "Last night was a mistake, kid."
"That's putting it mildly," I answered, feeling a bit better. I thought she was apologizing for the blonde. Like I said, I'm not too aware when I first get up. "What's with that chick, anyway?"
"You owe Lizette an... apology. You've got a lot to learn about Croix Hill, Patti." Barbara's smile was smug. "Fortunately you're surrounded by a lot of willing teachers. AD eager to show you the... error of your ways."
I began to get annoyed. Then I got sore. "What are you talking about? That girl, Lizette, came in my room last night and tried to--" Strangely, I felt embarrassed. Like I mentioned, I'm a man's woman. This girl-girl stuff made me kind of ill.
Barbara's voice became mocking. "Oh, did the big bad monster try to hurt precious little girl? I'm sure she didn't realize we've got a sweet little virgin here. Is this little--" Barbara reached out and patted the bulge of my crotch lightly over the covers, "cunt of yours sacred or something?"
I pulled away, my face flooding red. "Cut it out!" I felt like hitting her.
Barbara laughed. "You'll regret kicking Lizette out of your room, baby. Will you ever!" She turned abruptly and started out of my room. "Your initiation begins today for real. You flunked the easy part last night."
I stared at the doorway after she was gone. A tight feeling began in my belly. There was a quiet intensity about Barbara which made it hard to consider her words a joke. I remembered her hand on my crotch, and Lizette's visit. Initiation? To what? A club full of madwomen and lesbians? Shutting the door, I began to dress, my mind in a turmoil. Being in school was bad enough news without having to hassle with a bunch of nutty chicks. Initiation! I thought that jazz had gone out with purple lipstick! I finished dressing, brushed my hair and felt better as I checked myself out in the big mirror. It's funny how just knowing you look good makes a girl feel more human, more able to cope. I wore a royal blue sweater, pulled taut by a wide black belt, a very short A-line skirt, one that swung easily as I moved my hips, and royal blue knee-socks. With my light-brown eyes and dark hair I looked like a model for teen fashions. I hunted up my kidskin heels, then lit up my first cigarette of the day while studying the schedule Miss Deloffre had given me. A quick scan told me I was going to be spared a lot of studying as long as I remained at Croix Hill. The academic classes were far outweighed by the hours designated for swimming, modem ballet, gym and the rest. I finished the cigarette slowly, knowing that I was missing breakfast. That suited me fine. I was in no great hurry to see Barbara or Lizette again. Besides, it takes a while for my stomach to wake up in the mornings.
A very discreet bell announced the start of the first class. Bracing myself for whatever was ahead, I left my room, comfortable in the knowledge that I'd only have to put up with a few more weeks of this at the most. My thoughts of Gary helped too. I wondered. Was he counting the days, the hours and minutes as I was? Or was he already looking around for someone who could take my place? I pushed the thought out of my mind. Gary loved me. He'd said so. Then a strange and disturbing thought hit me. Had my father told my mother he loved her? Men! I remembered my mother telling me men couldn't be trusted. But then I wanted to laugh. In this world a girl didn't have a whole lot of choice.
My first class was English. It was a bore. Miss Hahn was the teacher here, and she seemed as disinterested in her course as her twelve students. She was one of those hyper-feminine types, the kind that always seems to be clinging to others for support. There was a dark, Latin girl named Grace to whom Miss Hahn seemed constantly turning to for approval. It was really funny. Here was Grace, tall and obviously very self-confident, grinning and nodding after every other statement Miss Hahn made, tossing her short dark hair back with each gesture. And Miss Hahn would glance over at the girl, seem reassured by her approval, then continue. I got so hung up watching this strange interplay I quit listening to the words. You'd have thought Grace was Miss Hahn's mother... or her lover.
Next came Science. This class was taught by an Englishwoman named Miss Wyndham. She was probably the most handsome and severe-looking woman I'd ever seen. Tall, trim, dressed in a tailored black suit, with salt and pepper hair, short cropped, and sharp, icy coal-black eyes. I could just picture Miss Wyndham wearing slacks, swiftly crossing over an English countryside with two Great Danes on a long double leash. There was a no-nonsense air about the woman, yet she too seemed remotely bored with the goings-on of her class. It was obvious that no one at Croix Hill put too much stock on education. Miss Wyndham's eyes kept moving over me from the moment I entered. She really gave me the creeps.
I returned to my room right after Science class. I wanted to have a quick smoke by myself before trying to brave lunch. As I entered, I felt strangely worn out, as if I were in some absurd play and everyone was waiting around for me to say or do something. The other girls had barely looked my way ail morning. Not that I gave a damn. Maybe part of my "initiation" was to be made to feel like the girl that wasn't there.
I closed the door gratefully behind me. Then I stared around me, aghast. The dresser drawers were partly open and some of my clothing was tumbling out. I crossed the room quickly and opened one, doing a slow burn. I held a pair of filmy bikini panties in my hand. They had been brand-new. I hadn't even worn them yet! I never would now. They had been slit down the crotch with a knife... or a nail-file. Numbly, I went through the rest of my underthings. All the panties had been sliced up the crotch. I inspected my bras. They had been mutilated too, each with the tips obscenely cut completely out. My nipples would be just too obvious if I wore them. Furious, I checked out the rest of my things, relieved to find that nothing had been touched except my bras and panties. I gathered up an armful of ruined clothing and started for the hall. Just then the door opened and Barbara, looking cool and smug, stood staring at me face to face. I wanted to take my clothes and just fling them in her face, but I maintained control, at least for the time being.
"Got a problem, kid?" A faint smile played on her lips, the blue eyes regarding me more innocently than ever.
"Did... did you do this?" I asked.
Barbara's laugh was cruel. "Do you have a problem? Poor girl. You don't seem to know when someone's done you a great big favor. Now just think. Think how sexy those big tits are going to look. Think how easy it'll be for your boyfriends to get inside your pants after this little tailoring job. You're complaining. And you should be thanking us!"
It would have been hard to miss her heavy emphasis on the word "us." It was her not-so-subtle way of reminding me that she had quite a bit of power behind her if I dared to step out of line.
"You... you've just ruined my things! And I'm not going to stand for it." It was now impossible to keep my cool. I wanted to strangle her! "You can believe I'm going to report this to Miss Deloffre!"
Barbara's reaction was one of mild amusement. Her smile then broadened. "Why don't you just do that? She'll laugh you out of her office! Besides, those things are part of your initiation. It's your costume. You'll be wearing one of those bras and panties tonight," she smiled gleefully, "the night you begin your initiation."
"My door is going to be locked tonight!" I dropped the underthings by accident. I was annoyed that I should so easily reveal my nervousness in front of her.
Again she laughed. She had turned to leave, then hesitated. "And who do you think holds the keys around here?" Long after she was gone, her mocking words hung heavily in the room.
I'd cooled down quite a bit by the time I left for the dining room. It had suddenly occurred to me that I had nothing to worry about, really. Gary'd get me out of there. I only hoped it happened before I killed somebody.
Lunch and the remainder of my classes passed uneventfully that day. It was pretty much like before, with me feeling strangely ignored by most everybody. Although scheduled for swimming and dancing that afternoon, I was able to avoid these classes by rounding up missed assignments and checking out textbooks. I've never gone in for sports too much. The only athletics I dig on are the indoor, in bed variety.
I still had a few hours before dinner after collecting my books and checking over the assignments I'd missed in the past few weeks. Glancing at the work sheet I was again impressed. If I gave a damn at all about my grades I could pull down straight A's simply by staying in classes.
Returning to my room, I was relieved to find that nothing had been tampered with this time. I closed the door, carefully locking it behind me, then stretched out on the bed. Again, I felt curiously tired, as if the day had already folded in on itself several times. I would have enjoyed a little nap, but whenever I closed my eyes, thoughts of Gary and the life I'd left really jolted me. I thought of the yellow sands of Santa Monica beach. Thought about the salty odor of the ocean where a bunch of us used to surf. I was feeling homesick, I guess, for a home I'd never really had. It suddenly occurred to me that I was conjuring up a past that had never actually been mine. I mean sure, I grooved on the beach, and all the other things girls my age dug. But after my first taste of fucking, sex took the place of everything. It was truly an obsession. And there I was, lying here trying to make myself believe all I'd given up was a two-year stint as Gidget. No wonder I was feeling so up-tight! Already I was sex-starved. I allowed myself to dwell on Gary's body, then I began thinking of other boys I'd known in the past. Trying to pretend my body hadn't known the bitter-sweet agony of heavy loving certainly wasn't going to make me feel any better. Sex was the one thing that gave my life any meaning since I'd come to live with Aunt Louise and Uncle Norm. Before that time, before my fourteenth birthday I filled my life with a never-ending yearning for my mother.
Then I met Dave Clark. He was nineteen, and worked at a nearby garage. He didn't give a damn that I was only fourteen. I'd fallen into the habit of stopping off at the garage on my way home from school. Aunt Louise never said anything as long as I got home before dark, so I took to hanging around the garage, lingering over a coke from the machine. Dave was one of three guys who worked there. He was a mechanic and always wore those old flannel shirts with his jeans. He had terribly sexy, muscular arms, usually covered with grease. There was something about him that turned me on. His curly dark hair, the way the thick grease clung all over his clothes and skin. It seemed to have something to do with my aunt. I'd find myself sticking around the station every day, just praying that Dave would notice me. Then I'd go home to Aunt Louise, and she'd begin questioning me about this girl or boy in school, the "desirable" types she was constantly hoping I'd get next to. There was something about her snobbish airs that delighted me when I looked at Dave. In my mind I could see him grabbing me and smearing my body with that filthy grease. It excited me. I could just see myself inventing big lies at home, about how the Heathcliff children were dying to be my friends... while all the while Dave's grease, and his kisses, would cover my skin beneath my clothes.
It was Stu, however, who noticed me first. He was another regular at the station, but unlike Dave, he looked like he'd just stepped out of a TV commercial with his always-starched, white uniform. He was cute too. Stu had been making jokes about my body to the others. After a few days of this he gave it up and began coming over to the coke machine whenever I did, asking me questions, admiring my body. I was so green at first I hadn't even caught the meaning of some of his earlier remarks. Like the time he watched me take a swig of coke and asked if I wouldn't like to wrap my Lips around something else, instead.
Then Dave started to notice me, too. But he never said a word until the day I bumped into him as I was coming out of the John at the station. The women's room door was right next to Dave's little working area. Bumping into him had been entirely my fault. I was blushing furiously as I apologized for being so clumsy. Dave just looked at me, running his long-lashed dark eyes slowly over my body.
It was late in the afternoon and only Dave and Stu were on duty. I knew Stu was eyeing us from the office. "Do you wanna come with me?" Dave asked softly. He gestured toward the little room behind the parts office. I remember how loud my heart was pounding as I nodded my head. I could smell the thick aroma of the mechanics' grease which stained his olive skin and crescented his nails with oily blackness. I followed him into the dark little room. Clothing hung all over from hooks screwed into the unpainted walls, and bits of car parts were scattered all over the floor. There was a little cot at one end of the room.
As Dave led me nearer to the cot, I thought the pounding in my chest would drown out any words we might say. But he didn't speak. He simply laid down on the cot, barely leaving room enough for me. I hesitated, suddenly feeling awkward and shy.
I guess Dave had been around. He seemed to know instinctively how inexperienced I was, and also he knew how desperately I wanted him. He was so cool. So confident. I think he was actually smiling as he unzipped his fly and then pulled his prick out of his pants. It looked like a fat, fleshy sausage to me then. I stared, fascinated as the prick swelled and stiffened right before my eyes.
Being numb, I suppose I was as flexible as a rubber doll when Dave grasped my hand and guided it to his cock. The heat and hardness of it burned a peculiar warmth into my palm as I explored the strange new toy. Although I know now that Dave was just average, at the time I was astounded that his thing could actually get that big. He began moving his hips with this rocking motion while I continued playing with him until he suddenly reached up and encircled my breasts with his big grease-stained hands, pulling me roughly to him. I squeezed down painfully hard on his prick as his lips crushed down on mine, then he filled my mouth with his tongue.
After that everything seemed to happen like in a movie. Like it was slow motion or something. Dave made me undo my own bra and bring my little nipples to his lips so he could suck on them. He had me raise my skirt while he slipped off my panties, then finally, he eased me onto the cot, at the same time climbing over my naked body.
It was me, led by instinct alone, who actually brought his prick to the edge of my throbbing hole. There was pain, but it had no special meaning to me at the time. All I knew was that the life-long ache in my groin was easing. Slowly being soothed. I remember throwing my legs open to help; remember begging Dave to fuck me as hard as he could. I wanted him all, fully, I wanted him to make me scream with the pain, as if only through pain could I wring out the last ounce of this unbelievable pleasure. Then at last came the pounding, the merciless lashing of his hips against mine as he began to shoot his hot load into my newly awakened cunt.
Afterwards I was left alone on the cot, still ultimately unfulfilled, yet somehow relieved in a way I'd never been before. What happened next to me was mostly a blur--I barely recognized Stu when he entered the room, but the flash of his white uniform as he removed it made me suddenly aware of my own nakedness. Then, before I could make a move, he was on me, shoving himself into me without any preparation. He slid into my recently stretched hole easily, the combination of Dave's come and my juices making me slick inside. Confused and surprised, I tried to push him away, but it was useless. His cock, larger than Dave's, beat into me with a fury I had never known. Soon I began protesting, yet even as I protested, my mind screaming out in rage, the feel of his huge prick began to do strange things to me. It was as if I had become one open, pulsating hole created just for that moment I felt a wave begin to build inside of me, I became ecstatic, then suddenly I stopped fighting him. I couldn't. Motionless, I just lay there, letting his stiff cock thrust in and out of me fully. Soon I began crying out, again, digging my heels into his lean ass as my cunt abruptly tightened, convulsing around his prick. He was making me come, and it was the most wonderful sensation I'd ever felt. At that moment it didn't matter at all that this wasn't Dave, in fact it didn't matter who or what he was. All that mattered was that I was finally coming. I was riding a wonderful, stabbing hunk of meat and it was bringing me to a place I'd never been before.
After Stu finished he dressed, and then left the room. I remained on the cot, trying to recapture that incredible feeling, knowing right then that never again would I be able to do without the instrument of my ecstasy. I would always need a man now, and I meant to see that there'd always be one around.
That thought alone brought me back to the present with a start. Ha! If I didn't get my ass out of this classy dump soon it might be months, maybe years before I so much as laid eyes on a male. It just wasn't fair. I wasn't built for this cloistered nun bit! Sighing, my beautiful dreamy mood hopelessly spoiled, I got up and glanced at the time. Slowly, I began to dress for dinner.
As before, dinner was an elaborate affair. The food gave me an excellent appetite. The other girls were still playing I-know-something-you-don't with me, but I scarcely noticed them this time. I was too busy trying not to notice Joycelyn Deloffre.
There was a certain attractiveness about this woman which had nothing to do with her obvious surface beauty. Often, my eyes would be drawn to hers in spite of my attempts to look elsewhere. I was finally tempted to get up and tell her about Barbara's attack on my clothing, but I just couldn't. Now that so much time had passed the whole thing seemed kind of childish and petty. Besides, Joycelyn seemed so poised that it would be hard to go to her with anything less than an all-out emergency problem. This evening she was dressed in a simple black sheath made elegant by the perfect lines of her body. Though she smiled and talked comfortably with the girls, Joycelyn still maintained her air of absolute control, apparently without effort. I felt this ridiculous urge to blush whenever I felt her eyes on mine, which was often. Like a kid with a crush on the teacher, I just couldn't help hoping she liked what she saw.
After dinner the girls broke up into little groups and I again decided to go straight to my room. Joycelyn disappeared also, so I couldn't see any reason to hang around. The delicious meal had been a bit heavy and I was feeling drowsy. It seemed like as good a time as any to catch up on my sleep--that's the least I could accomplish while I was stuck here. I locked my door carefully and began to undress. Naked, enjoying the quiet and privacy of my room, I padded into the bathroom and ran water for my bath. Pouring the crystals into the rushing water I recalled Barbara's words about tonight's "initiation." I brushed away my uneasy thoughts with a twinge of annoyance. The blonde talked big, but she wouldn't dare. Besides, I'd taken pains to lock my door.
The spicy scent of the steaming bath water filled my head as well as my nostrils. I was half asleep as I toweled my glowing body, then finally headed for my bed. Not thinking, I reached for a pair of sheer panties. Then I realized they were still slit, this pair allowing the silky-damp hairs of my pussy to show through. Silently, I again cursed Barbara. Getting in to bed I reached up and turned out my bedlamp. In minutes I was asleep.
It seemed I had only been sleeping a minute when I woke staring into a blinding light.
"Hey! What the...!" Strong arms were pulling my sluggish body, stripping back the covers, forcing me from the womblike softness of my bed. Instinctively I struck out in all directions as a hand closed over my mouth. My blow missed its mark but my teeth bit down hard on the suffocating flesh. A girl screamed out in pain and I was immediately slapped hard across the cheek. I cringed as a gag made of some kind of silky material was suddenly forced into my mouth. Other hands kept me from resisting further as the painful cloth became tied fast behind my head.
I tried to make out who was in the room but it was impossible because of the flashlight beam they held in my eyes. There were at least four of them, Barbara, Eileen, and two others whose voices I didn't recognize. I didn't waste any time wondering how they got in my room; I was too busy wondering why they were here. What were they planning to do with me?
"Get her robe," someone hissed.
"Where's the collar and leash?" asked another.
Quickly, a large leather collar was forced around my neck and buckled tight. It was attached to something like a dog leash made of silver chain. I was forced to put on my bathrobe and then my hands were secured behind me by a pair of leather handcuffs. I cursed my intruders silently as anger and fear brought humiliating tears to my eyes. Then hands were dragging me out of my bed, half-pushing, half-pulling me to my feet. If only they'd stop flashing that light in my eyes, I thought. If only I could see what's going on!
"Open the door now," Barbara's voice commanded.
With the click of the door I was pulled out of my room. I became cold and frightened. Unable to protest, I felt myself pushed and shoved for what seemed like eternity, down the many winding hallways, down into the cellars of Croix. Any time I slowed or hesitated I immediately felt the collar tighten till the pain became impossible to stand. Twice I collapsed to the cold, damp ground, simply from lack of oxygen. Finally our urgent journey ceased in front of a huge iron door. Everyone remained silent as Barbara removed a large black key from under the strange robe she wore, and as she inserted it into the lock, as scared as I was, I became angrier still. I promised myself I'd get even with this bitch if I had to spend the next ten years of my life in this nightmare to do it.
It took two of them to swing the heavy door open. Then I was propelled forward by a violent, unexpected shove. The force of the shove was so strong that it pulled the leash out of Barbara's hand as I fell tumbling into the awaiting room. I remained as I had landed, flat on my face, until I had the strength to turn over and face my enemies. The giggles I thought I had heard at first died away, and the silence became ominous as the freezing stone floor began to chill through my bones. I turned very slowly, unwilling to face them, yet forced to find out what this was all about.
The first thing I saw was this long cement wall. It supported a heavily beamed ceiling. Stuck in this wall, in the cement, I could barely recognize a pair of ancient handcuffs. There was a whole lot of other things stuck in the cement, all made out of iron. The place looked like a medieval torture chamber. Something out of the movies!
I got into a sitting position, intending to free the gag from my mouth. But what I saw on the other wall made me forget about the gag. Cruel hooks jutted out from the cement, each holding some kind of torture device. There were whips, belts, chains, and spikes... enough to make my blood run cold. Then I looked up to see two long leather straps dangling from the ceiling. They ended in what looked like a pair of woven leather handcuffs. Over in the corner was a wooden contraption with holes for wrists and ankles, with a small, fur-covered cot nearby. I turned slowly, staring around me, knowing that I in turn was being watched by every eye in the room.
On a long table, near the whips, there stood an arrangement of blunt rubber objects resembling the cock of a man. They were all laid out according to size, and as I moved my gaze toward the end of the table I found myself staring at Barbara, Eileen, Lizette, and several others I didn't recognize. All were wearing robes of purple velvet; each had her eyes riveted squarely into mine.
Again I wondered if this wasn't some insane dream I was having. What had I done that was so wrong? What was a torture den doing in the cellars of Croix? I was in a medieval dungeon. The whole thing was completely unreal!
"Welcome, Patricia." It was Barbara who spoke. "Welcome to the Sisterhood of Croix." She smiled down at me, her face oddly excited. I'd never seen her so animated. Then, at her signal, the others began smiling, moving toward me, slowly closing their circle in upon me. Desperately I tried to jump to my feet, but they were upon me immediately. There were hands everywhere, stripping off my robe, pinching me, gouging my tender skin.
"Wow!" A dark-haired girl giggled as she cupped one of my breasts in her hands and squeezed, "Her tits are great. Just look!" She took the nipple between her fingertips and began to tweak it with none-too-gentle pinches. Through the gag my voice sounded like some strange, excited animal.
"She likes it, Julie." Barbara was grinning. "Do it some more. Harder."
I began groaning louder. Sick with rage and humiliation I began shaking my head from side to side.
"Hurry up." Barbara taunted. "She just loves it. The poor girl can hardly stand the waiting!"
In spite of myself, as I winced with the pain, the little tips began to harden. Now others joined in, leaning down excitedly, working on my helpless body.
"She really likes it." A redhead agreed as her hot mouth closed down around my rigid nipple. Immediately she began sucking at it, her experienced teeth making it impossible to pull away from her. Soon, I felt the others joining in, to rub me, feel me, wherever their pleasures took them. I lay absolutely still on that cold cement floor, too horrified, too revolted to make a move. Again, I wondered. Could this actually be happening? To me? Was this really me lying here in the middle of what had all the appearances of a storybook torture den? Me, Patti Holland, boy-crazy Patti, having my titties squeezed by one girl while another held my legs apart? It was crazy. Just too nightmarish to be real. Yet it was.
"Sexy panties she's wearing." Barbara smirked, her eyes blazing with excitement "Yeah," said another. "This one's really got taste."
Immediately the room was filled with giggles as Barbara leaned down to inspect their work. "Let's take a look," she said, matter of factly. The girl sucking my breasts moved to the other nipple as Barbara signaled another to open my legs farther. In spite of myself I flushed, knowing how I probably looked with my coral-lipped pussy completely exposed that way.
Barbara's inspection was thorough and rough. Her fingers felt like steel claws digging into my tender pussy. Then she got to her feet and returned to the chair she had been seated in. "Somebody work her cunt," she commanded. I stared pleadingly up at her eyes. They seemed strangely slitted, getting more so as the evening progressed.
Lizette sat down next to Eileen and began running her hand over my cunt. I flinched, but escape was impossible. The gag bit even harder into my jaws each time I tried to protest. There was no evading the hands, the probing fingers, the lips on my body. To make matters worse, I found that even as my mind screamed out with rage, at the same time I was beginning to enjoy the hot currents of pleasure that erupted from the sucking mouths upon my body. I was beginning to want the tongues, the hands. I watched, as if controlled by a morbid fascination I never knew existed within me. It was as if I was lying helpless before a poisonous advancing snake, and as the hand worked in between my thighs and parted the lips of my cunt, I felt myself relax as I watched it work its way in. I gasped as a mixture of pain and uncontrollable pleasure shot through me.
"She wants to tell us how good it feels."
"Take off her gag," Barbara ordered. "No one but us can hear her anyway."
The steady suction cm my nipple ceased as the redhead moved back and untied my gag. Then her mouth returned to the throbbing nipple.
Sucking in great mouthfuls of fresh air, I moaned uncontrollably as I tried to make sense out of the tormenting sensations that flooded my naked body.
"Don't play, baby," Barbara commanded, staring at Lizette's affectionate hand on my body, "Give it to her good. Make her come!"
Lizette's obedient finger increased its pace as it moved up and down over my tiny knob, rubbing it, tickling it, stroking it. I began feeling as if an electric current was being shot through me. Although I was still being held by the others, I was able to speak at last. "No. Don't. Please, don't touch me!" I pleaded. At the sound of my whining voice I became strangely infuriated. These creeps, these frustrated, demented queers were doing this to me. To me! They wanted me to beg them for mercy. They wanted me scared! "You goddamn bitches!" I screamed, "Take your filthy hands off me!"
"She still isn't ready to admit she likes it." Barbara's words were calm. Almost casual. "Come on, Patricia, why don't we admit we like what Lizette's doing."
As if to emphasize Barbara's words, Lizette pressed her thumb against my excited clitoris and began to move it in a circular motion. The sensation was almost overwhelming.
"I hate it!" Frantically, I tried to dislodge the hand with my squirming body.
"Wait!" Barbara motioned Lizette to get back with the others".
Suddenly freed of the sensations that had flooded my body, I found myself experiencing a weird mixture of relief and disappointment. My body had been unwillingly coaxed into a throbbing awareness, only to be abandoned with a suddenness which left me weak and panting.
Barbara's face was suddenly very near my own. "We're going to make you want it, Patricia. More than anything you've ever wanted in your life." Then she turned to one of the others. "Put the gag back." She smiled. "Prepare her for the straps."
Once again the silken cloth was tied across my mouth. I was forced under the hanging straps by eager, demanding hands. Mute, powerless to resist, the leather handcuffs were fastened around my wrists. Then Barbara and some others walked to the corner and began pulling on heavy ropes leading up to some pulleys above my head. I found my arms lifted above my head, my naked body suspended in the air. Then they lowered me just enough so that I could stand on my tiptoes.
Barbara and Lizette walked around in front of me while the others stayed behind and watched. I noticed a thin, coiled strip of leather held whiplike in Barbara's clenched fist. As she nodded to Lizette the younger girl moved toward me, smiled, then moved around behind me to reach in between my legs. At the touch of her finger on my clitoris, I jerked to one side, throwing off the hateful touch. I saw Barbara's hand lash out just a second before I felt the lash's fury on my cheek. I screamed as the cuffs bit into my wrists.
"Spread your legs, bitch!"
Numbly, I obeyed Barbara's command. Again Lizette's hand came between my thighs. I winced as the fingers closed over my clitoris, then began to relax as the sensations again began to penetrate my body. In minutes I found that I couldn't relax. My body began jerking uncontrollably.
"Stand still! Keep your legs opened!" Barbara hissed.
Again I tried, but what she demanded was impossible for me. I just couldn't control my writhing body.
"She needs to learn who's boss around here," smirked one of the others.
"Right!" Barbara grinned as she uncoiled the long strip of leather. Then she threw back her arm.
A horrible, pain cut through my body as I felt the lash lick across my breasts. Moaning, I tried to dodge the next blow, but Lizette's arm now encircled my waist, her finger working deeper into my cunt each time I tried to wiggle free.
"Good." Barbara seemed to grow more excited as she played the whip against my flesh.
Thin welts began to appear as she worked the cruel whip over my rounded belly, my thighs and legs, and as my moans grew louder under the gagging silk, her frenzied lashing increased its fury, never once touching Lizette's talented hands.
I soon found myself in an agony of pain and rage. I was icy fury mixed with titrations of indescribable pleasures. I became lost in all kinds of unknown sensations, too tormented to think, unable to scream, unwilling to cry, wishing only to be released or die. Somehow the pleasure merged in with the pain 'til both were one and the same. I found myself in some strange purgatory where nothing would ever change. Even my hatred deserted me, along with the furious embarrassment over what they were doing to my body. Would they never release me? What were they waiting for? What could I do to end this horror?
Barbara gave me my answer. "Make her come," she hissed. "Give it to the bitch so good she comes all over your hand." Each comment was delivered between her angry blows to my flesh. "Make her come!" she screamed. "Come!"
Come? How could I come? The excited pleasures were all too brief between the painful blows of Barbara's beloved whip. Each time my excitement would be shattered by the pain. I was in limbo, unable to carry the experience of either pain or pleasure to its logical conclusion. The girl was mad. Crazy!
"Come!" Barbara chanted, her face now dripping with perspiration. "Come!" The whip whistled through the air and cracked against my pain wracked body, "Come!" the others began to join her chant as the room became filled with their frenzied voices.
Maybe that was it. I could end all this... only by pretending that they had won in their determined conquest over my body. Suddenly I changed my whimpers into groans, hoping desperately that my act was convincing. I knew these girls were experts, that they would not be easily fooled. I moved my hips around the twirling finger in my cunt and then began groaning louder. Again the whip cracked down on my throbbing flesh as Lizette's finger inside me moved faster and faster. Finally I faked an explosive, quivering orgasm, screaming out through my gag as loud as I could. Through lowered lashes I watched Barbara's face. She was smiling at me. Her expression was one of victory. The pain and the finger had finally stopped. I was breathing in deeply, just as weak as if I'd actually come.
Without a word I was unstrapped, the collar removed, my robe draped around my body with hands supporting me until I was able to stand alone. Then the big door squeaked open, the light was again flashed into my eyes and I was returned to my room. Hands helped me back into my bed. Exhausted and nearly unconscious, vaguely aware of the burning that covered my body, I lay back on the mattress while the gag was finally removed from my mouth. Already half asleep, I willed myself to slip even deeper into the comforting unconsciousness in an attempt to blot out what had just befallen me. Then I heard Barbara's voice. It sounded so far away.
"Just remember, Patti, this a only the beginning."
I tumbled into the soundest sleep I'd ever known.
CHAPTER FOUR
I tried hard to ignore it, but the steady buzzing of the morning wake-up chimes finally broke through my sleep. I winced, then moved more gingerly in my bed as a fierce headache began pounding in my temples. The soreness of my body brought back memories of the night before with vivid abruptness. Pushing back the covers I stared at my flesh. I was really surprised. Aside from a faint pinkness where the welts had been, plus a few marks where the skin had been broken, my body looked much as it had before. With the band of sunlight weaving its way through my window I began to wonder if last night had really happened. If it weren't for the few remaining marks I'd have sworn it was all a nightmare.
I forced myself to get out of the bed. The first thing I did was to strip off the mutilated panties I wore. Someone had put them back on me, as a subtle reminder, no doubt. I tried to remember what class I was supposed to attend, then decided to forget it. It didn't matter. I wasn't going to attend my classes this morning. I was going to get a bit of coffee and toast, then have a visit with Joycelyn Deloffre! I may have been hesitant about going to see her about my sliced-up underthings, but I damn sure wasn't going to forget about last night!
I had no choice. I wore the ripped panties and bra, just the way they had been cut out for me. My anger increased as I dressed, though I did have to admit that there was something pretty sexy about the way they looked on me. Then I slipped into a loose sweater and short skirt, fixing my long hair in a neat, conservative style behind my ears. After applying a little make-up to my eyes I went out into the hallway to see the girls hurrying to classes, coming back from breakfast, everyone lugging their school books just like in high school anywhere. Again it seemed incredible that the night before had actually happened. The dining room was nearly empty when I got there. A sour-faced waitress told me I had only two minutes till classes, but I still managed to talk her out of some coffee and a roll I was grateful for the emptiness of the place. I didn't want to see anyone but Joycelyn.
I found my way to her offices easily enough, but an older woman doing some paperwork at a desk next to Joycelyn's told me Joycelyn was called away and wasn't expected back for two day: It was really a blow. I turned and started walking away.
"If you've got any problems you might see Miss Edwards." The woman smiled as she pointed toward fin office down the hail. "She's the guidance counselor."
I thanked the woman, then headed toward Miss Edwards' office. I was sorry Joycelyn was away, but I still had to talk to someone! The main thing was to get word to someone on the staff, someone who would put a stop to Barbara', queer torture sessions. I'm usually the last chick in the world to squeal on anyone, but Barbara had just gone too damn far. I hesitated before knocking on Miss Edwards' door. Maybe I should just split now. Maybe I could get word to Gary real quick and somehow just get the hell out of this place. The idea sounded great but I was stopped by cold logic. I simply had to wait until my aunt was out of the country... otherwise she'd get the police, the FBI, even the Marines out after my ass. That's the way she was. She'd never do anything halfway. Actually, only a couple of days had passed. I had to stick it out for at least another week and a half. And I had to make sure I didn't go through any repeat sessions like last night. This way, just before I split with Gary, I'd make a point of catching Barbara alone somewhere and evening the score.
Personally. Feeling better somehow, I tapped lightly on Miss Edwards' door. "Come in."
Pushing open the door, I waited until the youngish woman behind a large walnut desk looked up. She pushed some papers to one side, then turned to me. "Oh yes. You must be Patricia Holland, the new girl. Come in, Patti. Sit right down, won't you?" The woman indicated a comfortable-looking chair facing the desk.
Her drab face seemed to take on a peculiar glow as I tried to tell her what had happened. I left out nothing, though I found myself stumbling over some of the words as I spoke. I really didn't want to shock the woman, but I intended to let her know exactly what was going on in this fancy school for girls! After I was finished, I waited for her response, longing desperately for a cigarette.
In a very short time I was leaving the office torn between crying and frustrated rage. She hadn't believed a word I'd said. Or... or maybe she had. Maybe Miss Edwards had no intention to putting a stop to the "extracurricular" activities at Croix. I stopped in the hall and leaned up against a wall to consider just what had taken place in the office.
After I'd finished, the woman had smiled at me. Crookedly. Then she launched into this corny harangue about how we tend to "magnify" our "peer group pressures." Ha! And she'd keep asking me to repeat the sex scenes over and over, always asking for "a little more detail." It was like the bitch was trying to get her cookies off at my expense!
Enraged and depressed, I stopped off at the nurse's office to get excused from classes for the day. I rattled off an excuse about having a headache, then went back to my room.
In my room I got out my stationery and began writing my letter to Gary. I took great pains to word it so that anyone else reading it wouldn't understand what I was actually saying, nor would they be able to object to its contents. I said that although school was a bit difficult to adjust to after my summer vacation, I had a very nice room and found the food just "out of sight." Then I "reminded" him that his "mother's birthday" was just a week and a half away, and that he was supposed to be at the "surprise party" at around eight in the evening. Promising to write once more before the party, I closed the letter with fond affection. It was like Gary was some favorite cousin of mine who wasn't quite bright enough to think for himself.
Then I dashed off a quick note to Aunt Louise. It was a saccharin message which hinted that although I was green with envy, I secretly suspected that she'd chicken out of taking that trip the very last minute. I knew if anything could keep her from going after that dig, it would have to be the absolute end of the world. I felt much better after sticking the letters in the mail slot at the end of the hall. I was finally getting my little house in order. I went down to the kitchen to scrounge up an early lunch, then back to my room. I was rapidly learning to love my solitude.
In my room I decided to take a little nap. I was still exhausted from the night before. As I lay there, I couldn't help wondering if I'd be able to last around here until my aunt finally left for Europe. Then my thoughts went to Gary. I had difficulty trying to visualize his face but the memory of his big cock plowing into me was even more vivid than usual. Sighing, I crossed my legs to stifle the itch that was always generated by my thinking of Gary's cock.
I must have been more tired than I thought. When I woke up it was dark. Flicking on my bedside light, I noticed a dinner tray on my dresser. The food was colorful but quite cold, so I knew it had to have been there awhile. I nibbled at the dinner as I read Barbara's short note: Patti dear, I heard about your headache and didn't want to disturb you. I brought you dinner. You need your strength.
love, Barbara The bitch!
She was right, though. I did need my strength. I needed it for that wonderful day when I'd get around to kicking her sweet ass black and blue! Pushing the tray away, I got undressed. I put on a nightgown and got back into bed with a book I'd been saving to read. It was about a girl my own age who makes a switch from love of riding horses to a new love of men and fucking. I wondered what had taken her so long to see the light. Although I'd slept most of the day, I'd read only a dozen pages or so before I fell off to sleep.
This time I actually heard the key turning in the lock. I was halfway out my bed by the time Barbara, Eileen, Lizette, and a rather boyish brunette named Janice broke into the room. My light was still on, rendering their blinding flashlight useless. I'd had more than enough sleep this time. Wide eyed, more prepared than I'd been the night before, I backed into a corner and faced my schoolmates.
"All right. Get out of here. All of you!" I glared. "You've had your fun, Barbara. The last of it. Now I'd like to get some sleep!"
Barbara's laugh contained a distinct amusement. "Still the tough one, aren't you. Well, I think you've had enough sleep for awhile. Let's just not waste any more time." Her expression changed as she turned to the others. "Get her, girls!"
"No!" My hand shot out, striking Lizette who was closest to me. Then the others came at me. From everywhere. I tried to fight them off but it was hopeless. Hands were on me everywhere, grabbing me, slapping me, knocking me to the floor. There wasn't even time to scream as they gagged me again and forced that horrible leather collar around my neck. They hooked on the chain leash and pulled me out into the hallway. Once again the flashlight's bright beam was whipped into my eyes. Just as before it was impossible to see where they were taking me, or exactly how I got there. As we descended down the winding tunnel, the chill of the cold cement permeated my thin nightgown. I was actually shivering when we reached the forgotten wing that led to Barbara's private torture den.
As Barbara worked on the iron lock with her huge key I felt that the gag was strangling. Even now my breasts ached from the stinging blows they'd received the night before.
"Inside!" Barbara tugged viciously on the leash as the collar bit into my flesh.
Inside a half-dozen girls were waiting. Some I knew by name, others I'd only seen in classes or at dinner. They were all seated cross-legged on the floor. They wore the attentive look of teenagers who are about to watch a particularly exciting movie. Eagerly, their eyes followed my every move, the look in their eyes humiliating me even more than the thought of the acts that were sure to follow.
"Strip her!" Barbara unsnapped my leash, leaving the harsh collar around my neck. Then she stood back and waited as three of them took off my nightgown and fastened me into the long leather straps that hung from the ceiling.
I knew my fighting them was useless, yet I just couldn't stand by while they tied me up, knowing the nature of what they were planning to do. How ridiculous I must have looked, suspended in the air, trying to kick out at my attackers. Yet I couldn't stay still. It was like I was fighting for my life. I felt my flesh redden with embarrassment as every eye in the room became glued to my naked form. I remained kicking helplessly as Barbara cleared her throat and turned to the patient group.
"Patti had a little talk with our guidance counselor today, girls." She sounded like a teacher, or somebody's slightly disappointed parent. "It seems she wasn't as happy with last night as she should have been. Possibly she didn't have enough discipline. I think the naughty girl just wants another little spanking."
Upon Barbara's signal, Lizette, Eileen, and Janice went over to one of the walls and picked out some small leather strips resembling the one Barbara had used on me the night before.
"Give it to her good girls." Barbara sat on the floor with the others. "Then we'll see if she's ready to listen to reason."
I moaned as the three girls circled me menacingly. The first blows landed on my soft body almost experimentally, as if the leather first had to warm itself to my flesh. Janice was directly in front of me. Her plain face was grinning harder as she brought the lash down on me with increasing intensity. At the same time Lizette's whip criss-crossed my bottom, building in force until my soft backside was virtually glowing. Soon the cheeks of my ass were a dark red, slowly turning to a ghastly purple hue. Eileen worked the leather over my back and sides while Janice concentrated her attention on my breasts. My soft underbelly was also included in their deliberate, systematic torture. I don't know exactly when the blows ceased just stinging and turned to pure, unadulterated pain. I only know it was gradual, and that soon I was moaning and sobbing in agony. As before, I tried to move out of their reach, but although the straps gave me some freedom of movement, the girls' lashes followed me everywhere. There was just no escape. After a while I couldn't tell who was doing what as I became blinded by my own tears. I didn't hear her, but Barbara must have signaled for the girls to stop. She walked up to my quivering body and removed my gag. Gasping for breath, I tried desperately to stifle my sobbing. I stared over her shoulder through watery eyes, completely puzzled by the curiously satisfied looks on the faces of the others.
"Okay, Patti." Barbara patted my cunt affectionately. "Do you think you can be a good girl now? Do you think you have learned to obey?"
I looked at Barbara, knowing full well I should say and do whatever I must to get out of this horrible situation. Yet something just held me back. I just couldn't give this girl the satisfaction she demanded. Slowly, I drew back my head, allowed my mouth to fill and then spit in her face.
Some of the girls giggled openly as Barbara, openmouthed, just stood there with my spit running down her face. When she finally spoke it was like she was hissing at me between clenched teeth. "This girl just loves our beatings." She was trying hard not to lose control. "Okay. Fine, I'll see to it that she gets her fill."
Watching her walk to the wall filled with torture objects, I suddenly began regretting my impulsiveness. She could beat me to death. Right here in this room! Probably no one would mention a thing about it later! And I was powerless to stop her, now. Powerless to protect myself! It seemed that the entire room was holding its breath in the ominous silence that followed.
Slowly, Barbara reached up and selected a long, heavily braided whip from the wall. Then she walked toward me slowly, carefully, motioning the others away. Her lips were tightly drawn across her teeth. Bloodless. I began to tremble as I read the controlled anger in her eyes.
At the sound of the whip-whine my body quivered. Then there was a cracking sound, followed by the most excruciating pain I'd ever felt in my life. I couldn't scream. I was barely able to gasp. Again the whip struck me, this time drawing a heavy welt over my midsection. I screamed then, with all my might, pulling at my bonds and twisting around in a half-circle as if somehow this movement would reduce my agony. But my maneuver only served to relocate the area of Barbara's attack. This time the searing burn ripped across my inside thigh and I was ready to say anything, do anything, be anything it took to stop this horrible pain.
"All right!" I screamed out, unable to control myself any longer. "Please, Barbara. I'll be good. Stop!" I pleaded, "I'll do anything you say!"
"Forever and ever!" she screamed back at me. At the same time she cracked the whip against my aching flesh harder than before, as if giving me a taste of what I might expect if I didn't keep my word.
I had almost passed out from the hideous pain. Blinded by my tears, unable to keep my body from shaking, I couldn't see the smile of satisfaction I knew must be on Barbara's face. It didn't matter anyway. I was just too defeated to care. For the first time I was willing--almost eager to do whatever she would have me do.
"Release her." Barbara watched as the girls carried out her orders. I almost fell down as the supporting straps above my head were lowered. Strangely, I felt no pain in my wrists, though I could see they were blue from the pressures of hanging. But I hurt so much all over I just couldn't pay attention very long to any one part of my body.
"Come here, Patti." Barbara stood in place as I stumbled to her. Her eyes were pleased as they raked over my well-marked flesh. "Get on your knees." Her hand went out to my shoulder and began slowly pressing me down.
"Apologize!" she demanded as my knees touched the ground, "You will apologize to me!"
The words stuck in my throat. Yet the memory of the whip was overpowering. "I... I'm sorry, Barbara." I bowed my head. When I looked up she was smiling.
"Now kiss my feet!"
I stared at her. I couldn't believe she was serious. Yet her eyes left no doubts and I forced my head down, intending to comply with her insane command. Just as my lips were inches away from her bare feet something inside me rebelled. I just couldn't obey! Instantly I heard the whip scream out and again felt its cutting power. As if by magic my lips were drawn down to her foot.
Barbara spoke as I was kissing her toes. "You're going to run your precious tongue over my entire body, Patti. Do you hear?" I looked up to see her shrug off her robe, exposing her naked body before the rest of us. Her slim form was attractive enough, yet nothing I'd ever seen before ever repulsed me as her body did right then. "Start with my feet and work up while they watch you. Maybe then you'll know who's boss here!"
I hesitated.
"Do you need more... encouragement?" She lifted the whip in the air behind her head.
Sick with fear, I bent down once more toward her feet. I just couldn't take another whipping. I'd have to do anything she asked. Anything!
I ran my tongue across her toes and up over her slender ankles. Rapidly, I worked my mouth up her smooth legs, trying to ignore the giggles from across the room. I finished lapping the top of her thighs, then once more I hesitated. Surely she didn't expect-- The whip descended on my tormented skin with a violence that made my buttocks quiver uncontrollably. I cried out wildly, flicking my tongue between her thighs. Immediately I tasted the saltiness of her pussy; felt her hairs tickle my lips.
"Lick it good," she commanded. Then I felt her whip being drawn across my back as an ominous reminder of her complete authority.
I broke out into uncontrollable sobs as I jammed my tongue in between the lips of her pussy and lapped the juices from the sopping hole. I felt a wave of nausea come over me as I concentrated on the lightly-haired vee of her box, laving it slowly and completely with my tongue. From the corner of my eye I could see the other girls watching. Still on the floor, many had changed their positions. Several had their gowns up around their waists, fingering themselves and each other. A very young blonde had her face buried deep in Eileen's pussy. At the same time Eileen was fingering the gushing hole of another. Finally Barbara had me raise my face to her belly. I continued licking quietly, slowly running my tongue over the flat stomach, over the silkiness of her small, lush breasts. Again my stomach trembled with revulsion as she held my head tight, making me suck her nipples. I looked up to see her wet glittering eyes. I knew she was close to an orgasm. "Carrie," she called hotly, "Come here!"
A small dark-haired girl broke from the circle and walked to us. Without a word from anyone, she got to her knees and began to suck Barbara's pussy. "Get behind me, Patti. Do my back. Lick me all over!" she commanded. Like a brainless puppet I crawled behind her and did as she ordered. My aching tongue lapped at her heels, up over her calves and slowly wandered up the backs of her legs. Forcing back the bile in my throat, I skimmed my tongue over the flaring cheeks of her ass and then headed for the small of her back. Barbara had other ideas.
"Back!" she yelled down at ire. "Inside my ass. Lick me! Hurry!"
Barbara's voice was really strained. I could see Carrie's tongue probing deep in her hole now. I became fascinated. Suddenly I felt Barbara twist around and begin lashing at me with the whip. I tried to fight off the blows, but almost immediately I was in tears again, begging for her to stop. "I'm sorry!" I screamed up at her. "I'll do it. I'll do it!" Desperately I reached out and parted the cheeks of her white ass. I dared not think of what I was doing as I pressed my face into her ass and began to lick her rectum.
"Inside!" She hissed at me, this time dropping her whip hand down to the side. I stared at the leather swishing back and forth on the cold cement floor. Then I clenched my eyes shut tight and pushed the tip of my tongue inside her asshole. Barbara began moaning and rotating her hips as the two of us licked at her frantically. I used my tongue on her as if it were a cock, digging into her, stabbing at her sopping flesh, wishing with all my soul I could be giving her pain instead of pleasure.
Her orgasm was violent, jerking her ass in hard against my mouth. When she finally pushed us away from her I sank to the cold cement floor and again began crying uncontrollably. I felt more defiled than ever before in my life. I was almost hysterical. I begged them to return me to my room. I promised them I'd never say anything to anyone again. But Barbara wanted my soul.
After she had recovered from her orgasm she made me get up on the little cot. Then she pushed me backwards, arranging my legs so that my thighs hung over the furry edge. She then turned to the group and signaled Janice.
"You're one of our best, Janice. Come eat her. Let her find out how sweet our little parties can be."
"No!" I struggled to get up on my feet, but Barbara was far too strong for me now. "Please!" I whispered to her urgently. The thought of being further humiliated by these people drove me nearly out of my mind.
"I see you need a bit more encouragement, Patricia." She lifted the whip.
"No! I'm sorry!" I stared up at the whip. "I... Ill do whatever you want!" Who was I trying to kid? I'd do anything to avoid that whip. Anything. Hadn't I proven that to myself already?
Janice smiled as she got to her knees and began kissing my pussy. Then I flinched as her tongue began lapping at my sensitive flesh. At first I felt nothing but revulsion, but as the experienced tongue began working inside me, my feelings began to change. I started getting wet and sticky inside. My tense body, pulled taut by the pain and fear, began reacting gratefully to the gently rotating tongue. But this was wrong! I wasn't... one of them!
As Janice lapped at my clitoris I tried in vain to concentrate on my humiliation, my rage, on my hatred of Barbara. I thought of all those girls watching me, enjoying my helplessness, yet nothing I thought of could distract me from the exciting sensations which were beginning to rock my body. Not even the pain I still felt mattered now. Yet I knew I couldn't let it happen! I just couldn't allow myself to come, allow them to bring me all the way from pain to absolute pleasure! Even as I told myself all this, my hips were beginning to move. I looked down and saw myself pushing my cunt even further into Janice's mouth. Hating them, hating myself with even greater intensity, I held back as long as I could, then I sobbed out and finally let go, exploding all over Janice's wildly rotating face.
I was silent as they led me back to my room. There was no need for the collar, no need for the flashlight. My tears kept me from seeing where I was or where I was going.
Back in my bed I lay motionless for long minutes, my sobs the only sound in the room. I felt miserably confused. The horror of this night, together with all the other indignities I'd suffered since entering Croix Hill seemed as nothing compared to the memory of that violent orgasm. How could I have allowed myself to respond? How could I have? I knew better. What was wrong with me? Turning over, I buried my streaming face in the coolness of the pillow, wondering desperately about my own normalcy.
CHAPTER FIVE
"Wake up, Patti. You've overslept!"
Lizette's voice carried a trace of urgency as she gently shook my shoulder.
"Overslept? What... what time is it?" I got up slowly, still quite sore from the beating of the night before last. I'd extended my headache until the next day, but it looked like I wasn't going to get away with missing any more classes.
"It's ten. You have Modern Dance now. Miss Burns sent me to get you. I have to get back now." She opened the door. "I just love that chick. I don't want to miss another minute. Okay?"
"Yeah, I'm up." I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and got up. I tried to hide my depression. Barbara hadn't completely beaten away the last traces of my pride. Besides, I couldn't go on avoiding them indefinitely.
After Lizette had gone I stripped off my gown and studied my body. Only a few welts remained. Either I healed unusually fast or Barbara knew what she was doing with that whip. A good criminal leaves no fingerprints. Oh, Gary! I thought despondently. If he only knew... if only he had seen me two nights ago, on my knees, my face buried in a girl's--I broke off my black thoughts. I had to get through these next ten days, and I had to get through them with what was left of my mind intact!
I got into my leotards, figuring they would be most appropriate for the modern dance class. As I dressed I resolved to talk to Barbara that evening. Before, if possible. Maybe I'd sit by her at lunch. At any rate, it was clear to me that she was the one to talk to around here if I intended to survive until Gary got me out of here.
I stared in disbelief as I closed the gym door behind me. Interpretive dancing was in full swing before me, with Miss Burns pirouetting nude before the class, who were also completely naked. They were cross-legged on the floor, casually circling their lithe instructress. Their backs were all to me and only Miss Burns was aware of my presence. I edged to the corner of the huge room and put my books down on the floor.
Miss Burns walked to a small record player that sat on the edge of the curtained stage be- hind her. Tchaikovsky's symphony ended with a roar. Her beautiful, muscular body was perspiring freely as she lifted the needle from the record. Then she turned and smiled, clasping her hands in front of her. I found it difficult to avoid staring at the bushy black forest between her thighs.
"You are Patricia Holland?" She was looking at me. The entire class turned and began tittering as Miss Burns raised her hands to quiet them down. I recognized Janice, Lizette, Eileen, and a few others.
"Yes, Miss Burns." I kept my eyes on hers.
"All right, Patricia You know you're late, so let's not disrupt the class any further. Ill want to talk to you after class about this. Now remove your clothing and join us. Lizette will show you where to put your things. Lizette?"
Lizette jumped to her feet as if it were an honor to do the curvaceous raven-haired teacher's bidding. Grabbing my hand, she led me past the showers to a wall of well-appointed individual dressing rooms.
"This is yours." She pointed to number nine. "Hurry." Then she left me to join the others.
"Wow," I muttered as I began taking off my clothes. I'd heard of progressive education before, but this was ridiculous! This whole place was unbelievable. Again I silently cursed my aunt. Hell, modern dancing was the one class I'd been counting on. I could really get behind it. Especially interpretive dance. And now it looked like Croix Hill had even found a way to screw that up. I thought about Joycelyn Deloffre and wondered.
I edged up behind Lizette and began imitating her and the others. At first I felt weird dancing naked, but in this class I guess I'd have felt even stranger dressed. Besides, I knew my body was at least as groovy as the other girls', so let them look. The steps were easy, a lot like the calisthenics in my high school gym class the year before, only a lot more graceful. Before long I felt like I fit right in with the others. I quit being so painfully aware of my nakedness, forgetting everything except the music and the movement of my limbs. I began to feel better than I'd felt since arriving at this place. The only time I thought of the welts on my body was when I first noticed how some of the younger girls were similarly marked. It looked like I wasn't the only one around here with troubles.
After dismissing the class Miss Burns reminded me to stick around while the others showered and dressed. She talked to a pretty silver-haired girl, then busied herself with a stack of records. Finally she got around to remembering where she had instructed me to sit.
"Now then." Her smile was enthusiastic. "It's Patricia, isn't it."
"Yes, Miss Bums." I returned her smile. "Well, Patti, actually." I couldn't quite figure that look in her eyes, but I'd been here long enough to suspect the worst.
"Come," she extended her hand, "let's take our showers. That way we can talk without wasting any time."
I felt very uncomfortable under the steaming shower. Miss Burns' eyes seemed to be digging into me. She was standing so close to me! The very nearness of a female next to my naked body bothered me more than ever now. Even so, I was very careful not to alienate the woman. I had more than my share of enemies already. As we rinsed off together, Miss Burns gave me a short lecture on punctuality, but I noticed that her attention was riveted to my body, particularly on the remaining welts which now discolored my flesh.
Finally I cut the shower bit short, telling Miss Bums that I was just getting over a cold. As we dressed together, she suddenly turned to study my face intently. Then she spoke.
"Patti, I want you to think of me as a friend. If you need anything--" Her moist lips pressed against mine, taking me completely by surprise. Awkwardly, I pulled away, telling Miss Burns that I didn't want to be late for my next class. I even came right out and asked to be excused, but she wasn't about to let me go so easily.
"Yes, tardiness is very bad. We frown on it here. It's all in your instruction pamphlet, Patti. You really should read it more carefully, darling." She kept eyeing me hungrily as I leaned down to snap my bra.
"I'm really very sorry about being late today." I was getting impatient with her now. "It was just that I got to bed so late last night." I glanced meaningfully at the welts on my shoulders, then at the mutilated bra I was wearing. "Some of the girls invited me to a little party."
"How lovely, dear." She ignored my meaning. "You'll find the girls here extremely friendly once you get to know them."
Maybe she wasn't ignoring my point. Maybe she was just dense or something. "I'm getting to know them, all right. It looks like I don't have a whole lot of choice about that."
Again she pressed her lips to mine. This time her tongue slid into my mouth, but before I could resist she abruptly pulled away.
"There are choices," she sighed, "and there are choices." She picked up her purse, then hesitated. "From now on I'd like you to call me by my first name, Beth. Only when we're alone, of course. I do want to be friends with you, Patti. But that too, is really up to you." She then glanced at her watch. "Good-bye, darling." She did this curious little curtsy bit, turned and finally walked out the door.
Alone at last, I sat down on the dressing room bench. I felt lousy. The whole damn thing was getting to me bad. The kiss. It had really sickened me. More and more it was getting to be like some crazy, perverted nightmare. Only it was happening. I knew that now. It was actually happening. To me! I decided to skip my next class and take a walk. I had to think. I knew I definitely had to attempt to get that bitch Barbara on my side somehow.
No one noticed me as I snuck out the back. I headed straight for the wild countryside that stood on the north side of the school. Here the brush was thick and luxurious, with the colorful leaves of autumn matting the countryside in soft little hillocks. The air was brisk and fresh in my lungs as I discovered what looked like an old worn pathway among the leaves. It seemed to wind around in back of the school. Maybe this could be my way out of this place --a way to get out without being discovered. If I could just avoid going through the front gate it would really lessen my risks of being discovered later when I met Gary. I followed the path. I was still on school property. No doubt about that. From what I'd heard, the school owned the grounds and half of the surrounding mountainside as well. But if I could just find a way around back somewhere, a path that would maybe lead down to the road.
I stood frozen in my tracks, staring up into the face of I don't know what. He was large, dressed in coveralls. He looked more like an ape than a man, and he didn't seem surprised to find me there. He just stood there, grinning, as if he knew exactly what was on my mind.
"I'm Morris." Still grinning at me, the ape extended a hairy hand. "Jake Morris. You're a new one, aren't you."
"How... how do you do." I gripped his hand tentatively, "Patti. Patricia Holland."
"Don't worry, kid. I ain't gonna report ya for bein' out." He stood in the center of the path and began casually rolling a home-made cigarette. "Smoke?" He nodded toward the tobacco pouch in his dirt-stained hand.
"No. Not... now, thank you." I made a move to go past him, but he shifted his bulk in front of me. "You're new around here," he persisted. It was as if there was some special meaning in his words.
"Well, yes... Jake," Finally getting my wits about me I sat down on an old fallen tree by the side of the path and gestured that he should join me.
Jake sat down, striking a wooden match against the log we sat on. "I'm the school gardener." He lit the cigarette, inhaled deeply then casually blew the smoke at my swelling breasts. "A gardener has a way of knowin' things," he added.
His open leering made me uncomfortable at first, but then at least it was a man who was leering. I wondered what he meant by his crack. After all, a sympathetic gardener might be just what I needed when it came time for the big escape.
"I've only been here a short while. You're right. It's kind of like... a prison or something."
"Yeah." Jake chuckled softly. "You're no different than the others. They all feel that way," he stared at my tits, "at first."
"At... first." I was staring at the thick bulge in his pants.
"You want some?"
"I... what do you mean?" I cringed as his big hand fell on my knee. What was wrong with me? This wasn't like me. This was a man! I could always handle men.
"Most gals need a little... tapering off at first. Just 'til they get into the swing of things, ya understand. This school, being up-to-date and all, well... let's just say I take it on myself to make sure everybody's... adjustment goes smooth." After grinding his cigarette under his heel he proceeded to run his hand halfway up my skirt. His abruptness got to me first, but as I flashed on what I'd been through with the others I found that Jake kind of grew on me. Besides, I needed a man. It's as simple as that. Now, more than ever, I knew I needed a strong cock to show me I wasn't being gradually infected by living in this crazy prison nightmare. I responded hungrily as Jake reached out and pulled me to him. He took my hand and placed it on the throbbing bulge inside his pants.
"Yes." I inhaled his reeking, masculine breath and loved it.
"I do want it, Jake." I was whispering into his ear, "Take me. Take me now!"
The huge man lifted me as if I was a baby. He carried me to a sheltered clump of leaves a short distance from the path. I was glad that he didn't waste time. Immediately he climbed out of his overalls, then stood for a moment as if wanting me to admire his body. I gasped at the size of his prick. It was big. Longer than I'd ever thought possible, and thick and veined, like the heavy branches of the nearby trees. As he moved toward me I saw that his balls were also huge, hanging loosely beneath the massive cock. He helped me out of my leotards and underwear. Then without touching my breasts or stopping to admire my body, he spread my thighs and lowered himself onto me. I opened my legs as far as possible, then held my breath and waited. His huge body crushed heavily down on mine, yet I welcomed his complete masculine domination.
I felt the blunt tip of his cock pushing hard against my hole. The mere contact thrilled me and my pussy responded with nature's own warm juices. It had been so long! It seemed an eternity since a man had thrust himself inside me. My breath came faster as I realized a prick of that size was bound to cause me pain. I tried to prepare myself, but I wasn't ready for the savageness of his attack. His stiff wedge hammered inside me, sending a blinding flash of pain through my insides. I screamed out, trying to shove him off me. It was like I was a virgin, being ripped wide open for the very first time! Gradually I became adjusted to his rough treatment of my body. He was like a starved maniac. Totally selfish as he took his fill of my flesh, and the pain became filled with a thrilling pleasure as he throbbed within the velvety walls of my pussy. I threw my legs over Jake's hairy back and my moans became sighs of ecstasy. Instinctively understanding my need, he began to pound his cock into me, hurting me, yet thrilling me at the same time. An animal now, I swung my hips in against him hard, matching the force and rhythm of his brutal thrusts. He groaned, and my arms squeezed him tight as his fiery load shot into my steaming box. I too began to moan, and I reached up and forced his lips down on mine as I rode our mutual orgasm to an explosive finish.
He was off me now, getting back in his coveralls. Yet I was still naked at his feet, sobbing deliriously. My pussy was sore as hell, but it was my pussy, not my lacerated body! I felt more like a woman than I had in weeks. As I lay back on the leaves I watched Jake struggle into his coveralls. I thought of Janice's tongue in me and found myself comparing the two experiences. Certainly Jake had satisfied me more, yet the memory of that orgasm with Janice aroused me even more. I almost asked Jake to fuck me again on the spot.
"That was a good fuck." Jake grinned down at me, buttoning his last suspender. "I gotta git back to my roses now." He walked over behind a bush and backed out a wheelbarrow full of fertilizer. He started shaking his head, "There just ain't no end to the work around here," then he stopped and flickered his eyes over my still naked body once more. "If y'ever need me for... somethin', just ask around for Morris. That's what they call me around here." Then grunting and cursing at the rickety wheelbarrow, he disappeared down the path.
The huge clock atop Croix Hill Tower began chiming its hourly toll. My heart skipped a beat as I counted four bongs. I hadn't just missed lunch; I'd missed the next two classes too. I'd have to hurry if I was going to catch Barbara before dinner!
I rushed back into my clothes and ran, deciding to try her room right after I cleaned myself up. If I could just catch her there alone we'd be able to talk for a while. It'd be a chance to feel her out, a chance to get next to her. Somehow I just had to make her like me. I had to make her understand.
CHAPTER SIX
Knocking timidly on Barbara's door, I suddenly stopped. Putting my ear close up against the heavy wood, I could hear a distinct moaning sound coming from within. I turned to leave.
"Who is it?" It was Barbara's voice. Tense. Urgent. The moaning sounds had stopped.
"Patti," I answered.
"Patti!" After a pause, her voice sounded more relaxed. "Are you alone?"
"Yes, but... but I can see you later."
"Come in, Patti, dear child."
I pushed open the door and stared at the scene before me. I barely had the presence of mind to close the door. On Barbara's bed, one of the younger girls was lying on her stomach. She was stark naked, her cute little pink butt crisscrossed with fresh welts, her face half-hidden between Barbara's thighs. Barbara, also nude, was on her knees. In her hand was a belt. Her eyes were iced with passion, and the bruised girl seemed equally excited as she lapped at Barbara's cunt.
"Just... just a minute, Patti." She whispered down at the girl between her thighs, "Finish me off now, Marcy. Fast!" Then she closed her eyes and began to lovingly stroke the girl's injured buttocks. I just stood there as her eyes slowly opened to meet, then hold my own. As she began grinding her hips, rotating her pussy against Marcy's sucking mouth, I watched her small nipples harden, and the room became electrified as she let go into a violent orgasm.
I knew my face was the color of flames, yet I just couldn't tear my eyes away from them. A terrible fire was rekindled between my freshly washed legs as I watched Barbara briefly close her eyes, then, savoring the sensation for a moment longer, absently, she began stroking the young girl's head. After a while she gently pushed Marcy away. "Okay, honey. Now get dressed and go to your room." She patted the little red butt. "You've been a good girl."
Reaching for her robe, she put it on, then selected two cigarettes from a nearby pack and lit them. She smiled as she handed me one. I took it gratefully. As I smoked in silence Barbara disappeared into the John. Marcy quickly dressed as if I wasn't even there. She looked strangely satisfied as she left the room. It was as if she had been serviced by Barbara.
"Marcy gone yet?" Barbara yelled from inside the bathroom.
"Yes."
"Good. I'll be out in a few minutes."
I heard the sound of the hissing shower and relaxed a bit. I was grateful for the momentary privacy. I needed time to pull myself together. I'd just stubbed out the cigarette when Barbara reappeared. She was wearing the same robe, toweling her damp hair. She walked over to the dresser and pulled out a lacy, pale blue bra and matching panties. Then she went to the closet where she deliberated a long time before selecting a stunning lavender knit dress. These chicks really put it on thick for dinner. But why not? What else did they have to dress up for?
"Well, Patti," she said finally. "This is a surprise!" She put on the panties, dropped her robe to the floor and started to get into the bra. Her underthings, I noticed were unaltered. Having bowed my head, I blinked my way up to her blazing blue eyes.
"I just... wanted to talk to you."
"Sure." Barbara glanced at her watch, a thin piece of gold jewelry, while closing the clasp over her wrist. She slipped the dress over her head, wriggled into it, then reached for her hairbrush. She really looked beautiful. "What's new, pussycat?" She winked at me as she began stroking her hair luxuriously.
"Well, I... look." I stared straight into her eyes. "I've been wrong. About a whole lot of things. I... I just wanted to apologize." .
A thin smile crossed her lips as she moved over onto the bed I sat on. "Whatever for?"
"I... I wish you wouldn't play games with me, Barbara. I came here with... serious intentions."
"I'm sure you're serious." Her voice was amused. Confident. Her smile was completely unreadable.
"No, I don't mean it that way. I meant... sincere. That's the word. I want to be sincere. You know, no games."
"Let's forget words." Laying the brush aside, she moved in closer. "Let's talk about... feelings." Her hand immediately went to my thigh. "How do you feel, Patti? How do you feel, about me, about what's been happening to you here?" She paused. "I worry about you, you know. It's different with the other girls who go through initiation. They're so young. You're the oldest girl who's ever been through that trip."
It was impossible to keep looking into those eyes. Her voice had become coaxing, intimate, warm. My glance fell to her hand and stayed there. "I... I can't honestly say how I feel, Barbara. It would be a lie if I said I liked what's been happening to me. But I... I can't honestly say I haven't, either." Finally I looked back up at her. My neat little plan to get things straight between us was suddenly falling apart. "What... what's happening to me, Barbara. I'm so confused!"
Her soft hand drew my head to her lap just as I burst into helpless tears. It wasn't an act. At least not entirely. I was crying real tears, and that sure wasn't part of my script. I mean I was confused. So maybe I helped the tears along a little. Why not. My life with Aunt Louise had taught me it never hurts to help things along sometimes, just to make sure you get over your point. One thing was sure. I was affecting Barbara, and that's what I was here for.
"Oh God, Patti," I felt her lips on the back of my neck. "Of course you're confused! You're just so... so damn stubborn. That's all."
Her gentle kisses sent little shivers up and down my back. I felt my long hair being lifted from my neck, and as the kisses continued I felt her slowly unzipping the back of my dress. "Why not give in to it, darling," her voice was heavy with emotion. "Why not... simply... enjoy?" Casually, she began sliding my dress down over my shoulders, her beautiful lips whispering against my ear. "There's no point in fighting labels, Patti. That's all it is, you know." Reaching down, she turned my face up to hers. Her voice was velvety soft. "It's just a label."
With closed eyes I gave in to the wetness of her lips on mine. Somehow, alone with her, I wasn't bothered at all by what we were doing. I felt myself drawn to the girl. My body refused to fight her fingers as she slipped the bra strap from my shoulder. I knew right then I'd go through with it. I'd go through anything with her now... voluntarily, without gags or chains and beatings. It was better that way, and besides, it all seemed so... inevitable somehow. Besides, why should I make myself suffer when I had no choice in the first place. I could never get behind that martyr trip. That was Aunt Louise's bag, not mine.
"Cooperate with the inevitable." That's what Gary used to say.
Gary? Who was he?
My brain refused to work.
"Oh God, Barbara," she was spreading my legs, and as I felt her hand working up my thighs I was glad I'd taken the time to shower and change before coming to see her. "What's wrong with me?" I looked up at her urgently. "What... what's happening to me?" "Nothing." She slipped a finger under my panties, at the same time moving her lips to my nipple. "Nothing but a little happiness."
I threw my head back, allowing her mouth and tongue to work over my body. I felt my nipple stiffen in her mouth, my little clitoris growing rigid under her finger. I just couldn't understand my body any longer. Even when Jake had forced his big cock into me I hadn't been this excited. The room spun around me. So confused... I just couldn't seem to think any more. Couldn't even try. I just shut my eyes and felt. Barbara was good alone. Her teeth and tongue shot fire through my loins, at the same time her fingers made me cry out in wild delight. Almost immediately I felt myself starting to come. Sobbing with my need of her, confused within this brand new ecstasy, my body wrenched into the air and I screamed into her pillow as I became gripped in the fury of a long series of tormenting spasms.
Long afterwards I was still resting in Barbara's feverish arms. We'd both missed our dinner and neither of us seemed to care. Often I'd break out sobbing, each time my plea would be the same. "Please Barbara, please don't take me there tonight. Don't let them do it to me again. Please, I... I want to be yours. Only yours."
Finally she answered me. Her voice was maternal as she caressed my forehead with her long, narrow fingers. "We'll see, Patti. I'm not God, but we'll see." For a long time she just sat there, stroking my hair. Then I looked up at her, "You needn't worry any longer." Her smile was warm, looking deep into my eyes, "You're coming along beautifully."
That night I slept like a baby. No one came in to disturb my rest. When I woke up the next morning, however, it was a different story. As I caught the first streaks of daylight threading through my window my mind flew into a turmoil. What was happening to me! What was with this growing affection I felt toward Barbara. She was, after all, my tormentor. My enemy! Where would it all lead to? What was I becoming? Dragging myself from the bed it occurred to me that I had just been tired last night. After all, I hadn't been getting much sleep. And I was terribly frightened about the nights to come, not to mention what I had just been through with Jake. Evidently my session with Jake had got me more excited than I had thought. Naturally, when I barged in on Barbara that way, with that... Marcy just laying there like that--I'd have to be more careful next time. I really tended to get carried away with things. After all, it was just an act. I just wanted to get on her good side. I frowned as I examined the trim green suit I'd just put on for the day's activities. The suit looked great on me, but the face that stared back wasn't about to be fooled. Sure it was an act. It was planned that way. But the act was for Barbara, not me. How come I had fallen for it?
CHAPTER SEVEN
After a miserable hour with verb conjugations I ran into Barbara outside the door of my French class. It seemed like she'd been waiting for me, and since it wasn't like her to wait on anybody I figured it must be important.
"I just came from a meeting with the upper-classmen." Her hand was firm on my elbow as she led me out toward a small patio behind the library. "I've arranged for us to skip lunch in the dining room. We've got to talk in private so we can eat out here instead of with the rest of them."
Lined up against a wall of ivy, a sheltered row of vending machines stood, dispensing sandwiches, coffee and cokes to hurried students. I dug up a handful of change from the bottom of my purse and bought tuna sandwiches, salad, candy, and milk for us both. Barbara found a table far enough away from a foursome of teachers so that we could talk. I was really curious to hear what she had to say. She was superserious as I sat down where she'd been waiting. Finally she spoke. "They're going to let you in."
I kept quiet as she sipped a little milk, then set the carton down on the bench between us. "It's really a break for you, Patti. Tonight you're to undergo your final phase of the initiation. I don't know if you've heard anything about what we call 'last night', but this will be my only chance to set you straight. I just can't get... too familiar." She glanced at the table, then back into my eyes. "Tonight can be a beautiful experience for you, or a miserable one. It depends on you."
I frowned in confusion at her words, but I was smart enough to keep my tongue.
"As you probably know," she continued, "we have what we call a slave system here. It goes by age, more or less. All the younger girls are slaves to the older ones, with each upperclassman having her own private slave to do with as she pleases." She glanced around, then moved in forward, lowering her voice. "What you probably don't know is that the other girls are themselves slaves to the teachers here, in fact, to any teacher who might want them... in any way.
It's like a... a power structure. Like a pyramid. Well," she reconsidered, "it's more like a game, if you look at it that way, and it's important to remember that everybody plays."
A piece of sandwich stuck in my throat. "Everyone?"
"Everyone."
"All the students?" I knew my amazement showed, but I was just too startled to care.
"Every last one of 'em." Barbara leaned back. She was definitely amused.
"Every last... teacher?" My heart began pounding furiously.
Barbara grinned. "Every teacher," she nodded, "even-"
"Yes?" I knew what was coming. The very thought of Joycelyn Deloffre "playing" with the girls somehow excited me.
"Yes, even the headmistress of Croix Hill herself, Joycelyn! In fact," she leaned even closer, lowering her voice so that it was barely audible, "in fact this whole setup was Joycelyn's idea to begin with. That was the only reason for this school in the first place. She's really clever. Listen--" Barbara moved her chair over closer to mine. "She buys an old mansion miles away from the nearest squirrel. Then she stocks it with our 'special' kind of teachers, accepting only certain kinds of girls as students. For example--" She began ticking off her points on her fingers. "One. The students have to be rich enough so that their tuition alone pays the entire tab around here. That way we don't have to rely on snoopy outsiders to donate funds. Two. The students accepted have to be children of either superbusy, or indifferent parents. Parents who don't mind ditching their kids in a swank school and leaving them there... perhaps forever. Three, they must be girls who, for one reason or another, have gotten into enough hot water at home to make these same parents think ditching their kid in Croix Hill year after year, including vacations, is the best way to prove they're really proper parents." Then Barbara grinned at me. "And fourth, they have to be pretty. Like you." She grabbed my hand and squeezed. "Well, why not? Joycelyn doesn't care much for men and the only ones around here are Morris, the horny gardener, and his retarded helper, Jo-Jo. They come in handy from time to time, or they wouldn't be here either." Finally she leaned back, her face just beaming. "That Joycelyn doesn't miss a trick." Her eyes took on a radiant glow. "She's just... beautiful, that's all!"
As I finished my sandwich, Barbara paused. She seemed to be studying me.
"I don't know. She... she seems to be getting tired of me lately. She talks about you now. A lot-" I looked away quickly. My mind was reeling. I didn't dare think. Besides, I needed time to assimilate what Barbara had told me. "Tell me more about that... initiation tonight." I had intended on bringing her back to the point casually, but I guess a touch of the animosity I felt toward her creeped in.
"I... really can't go into details, Patti. But if you're a good girl tonight, if you give the satisfactory showing I assured the others you would, then we'll have this little ceremony, and you will be given a slave of your own. Then you're in. For good. You become one of us." She smiled mysteriously. "You'll be an Elder Sister. It's great!"
"Yes, I... I'm sure it is." Quickly, I gulped down the rest of my lunch, absolutely forcing myself to swallow.
"Well, sweetie, I've just got to get going." She got to her feet and picked up her purse. "I'll be seeing you later." I couldn't quite get the meaning in her voice as she picked up her books, waved good-bye and walked away.
I sat there a while, then dumped our refuse in the trash can and headed back toward my room. Arriving, I sat down and quickly scribbled out a letter to Gary, ignoring the bell that announced my next class. It would be Modern Dance for me again and I just wasn't up to Miss Burns right then. What the hell, with her thing about punctuality it would be better to miss the class anyway. Besides, Miss Burns wanted to be my friend, didn't she? Well, let her prove it! As previously arranged, I reminded Gary of his "mother's birthday party" in the letter. "Remember," I wrote, " the party will be at eight in the evening. All the guests will park down the road and wait till it's time. That way it will be a surprise." I sealed the letter and then walked down the hall to drop it in the mail slot.
The hall was empty. I'd forgotten that classes were in session. Hastily, I mailed the letter, then turned to return to my room. Just then I heard voices coming down the hall. I peaked around the corner to see Barbara and Joycelyn, arm in arm, heading in my direction. I absolutely panicked! I couldn't afford to get caught ditching classes, especially not by those two. And especially now, with me just getting things arranged for my big escape. It would be just like Barbara to make a big deal about my cutting classes just for the fun of making me go through initiation all over again. That would be just like her. Just to impress Joycelyn with her efficiency while at the same time taking care of me. I split out the back door and headed toward the back of the library. Finding a pathway that I thought led to the gardens, I ran, not really caring where it took me. I slowed to a walk as I realized that the pathway was actually circular, heading me back in the direction I came from. I was wondering if I should double back, when all of a sudden a tremendous streak of lightning split the sky, followed quickly by a boom of thunder. I looked around to find some shelter, then the sunlight dimmed as torrents of rain came crashing down on me. I ran toward the empty library, but the big rear door was closed. I cussed a blue streak as I started back around the building, trying to decide if getting drenched was better than getting caught. That's when I noticed the gaping door. There was this sound of hissing steam shooting up from below. I figured this must be the school boiler room so I started down the stairs, figuring I'd be safe and dry there till the rain let up. Just as I figured, when I got to the bottom of the stairs, I spotted two huge boilers, working away like mad. They supplied the whole school with heat in the winter, but now they were just collecting steam. It made the cellar hot as hell down there, but still it was a good place to wait 'til things quieted down outside.
I looked around me. Off to one side there was what looked like a small workshop, with tools and things hanging neatly on little wooden pegs. In the far corner of the room I saw this mattress on the floor, with blankets piled on it, pillows, and a teetering stack of comic books. I walked to the mattress, intending to check out the comics, when all of a sudden I heard this strange grunting sound coming from behind this slightly open door in the wall. I tiptoed to the door and peeked in.
It was a small, dirty bathroom. Standing over the toilet, holding a comic book in his left hand, was this huge hulk of a man. He was really weird. My first impulse was to run, but my curiosity kept me staring. His back was to me, and he was naked to the knees. His golden back was massive, godlike. He looked like a marble statue, come to life. It was obvious he hadn't heard me enter, so I took my time looking him over. His muscular back was terribly smooth, flawless. His broad shoulders tapered down to this real slim waist. And his buttocks were clenched, each side just bursting with knobs of bunched muscle, just like you see on statues of Adonis. Then I suddenly realized what he was doing.
Glancing from time to time at the comic in his one hand, he was frantically working his cock with the other. I moved a little to the side to see better. His glistening prick was very hard, a deep olive color, darker than the rest of his body. It stood away from his balls like a pillar of dark ivory, as unbelievably massive as the rest of him. Hair of a richer bronze than the curls on his huge head created a bed for his pounding fist. I watched in rapt fascination, my eyes glued to his swollen cock. Just then he seemed to sense my presence. Before I could move out of sight, the young giant turned. His face was ugly, brutal. It was the horrified face of primitive man, with a problem of some kind. I stared, and his hooded eyes blinked slowly back at me, as if it took him time to realize I was actually there. Then he growled and started for me.
"Wait... " I backed off. "I wasn't... I was only-" As the door swung open the giant fell to the floor. I guess he had forgotten his trousers which were now knotted around his ankles. He looked up at me, his eyes never leaving my face as he kicked himself free of the pants. I turned to run but he was on me, springing with the speed and grace of a panther. "No!" I shrieked, trying to pull away. My strength was like nothing compared to his. He started dragging me toward the mattress.
"Hey, look," I protested, finally gaining a little control. "I just came down here to get out of the rain. Honest. It started to rain--" I could feel his grip getting tighter as we neared the mattress, squeezing me up against his beautiful, naked body. He wasn't interested in any excuses; I decided to try making friends.
"My name's Patti. I'm new at this school." He stopped and cocked his head. "I'm not going to... tell on you, or anything. Hell, I'm cutting a class right now myself." He seemed to be listening. "What's your name?"
Suddenly the giant released me and opened his mouth as if to speak. I could see there was something wrong with the way his tongue moved. He seemed embarrassed at my staring and moved away from me like a nervous animal.
"What's wrong?" I wanted to calm him down. Now that he'd released me I felt quite calm considering my situation. "I'll bet you're the gardener's assistant. Jo-Jo, right?"
Slowly the giant nodded. I stared down to see his big cock still standing stiffly away from his balls. His confused eyes and trembling chin seemed so weak compared with that big, capable looking tool that I just had to laugh a little. I shouldn't have. My laughter seemed to both enrage and frighten him. Maybe he thought I was laughing at his retarded condition or something. He began making these horrible noises in his throat and I thought he was going to hit me or something as he came at me. Soon he had me backed into the corner. "Hey, Jo-Jo. I... I wasn't laughing at you. Honest. I mean--" Just then Jake Morris came down the stairs. He took one look at the two of us and his face grew angry. "Jo-Jo!" He came toward us, his big fists clenched in anger. "To bed!" he pointed at the mattress.
Jo-Jo turned and stared at his boss, a pathetic relief softening his brutish features. Then he chuckled a little, turned and ambled off toward the mattress.
"What the hell's been goin' on here?" Jake turned angrily on me. "You been scar in' him, girl? You makin' fun of him?"
"No. Honest!" I blinked back at him.
"Bull crap! Jo-Jo don't git mad that-a-way less somebody's done him wrong. He ain't right in the head. He can't talk or nothin', but I know him. He's a good boy, y'hear?"
"I... I didn't do anything to him, Morris. Honest!" I started to explain to him about coming down there just to get out of the rain.
"You was lookin' fer some more, again," he interrupted. "That's it, ain't it!" The big ape really sounded smug.
"I was not. I was just going out for a walk. Then it started to rain. I don't need you. Now... or ever!"
A crooked grin crossed his face. "Now I recollect. Yer name was Patti. Yep." He scratched his head, "I remember you real good."
"Well, I... I've got to be getting back now. I think the rain's stopped."
"You ain't very polite, Patti." Again the big man blocked my way. "Seems like a girl like you should have better manners, goin' to this fancy school and all."
"But-"
"After all, ain't that why yer folks sent ya here? To make a lady out of ya?" Then he turned to Jo-Jo. "How 'bout it, boy. You ain't had no fun fer awhile. Wanta help make her a lady?"
Jo-Jo seemed to understand pretty good. His slack mouth fell open into a grateful, idiotic smile as he jumped to his feet and ambled over.
"Don't hurt her none, Jo-Jo. Not unless she gets mean or somethin'."
Jake went over to the mattress and waited for Jo-Jo who was almost on me as I backed away. It was senseless to protest. He reached me in three long strides, picked me up under his arm and carried me back to Jake who moved over on the mattress to make room. The gardener's hands moved over me quickly, stripping away my clothes. Then he began rubbing me with his calloused hands. "Sure got nice tits, don't she Jo-Jo?"
Jo-Jo didn't seem to hear his master. His massive cock with its mushroom shaped head was throbbing against my leg as he reached down to spread open my thighs. I groaned as he pressed his meat up against my hole.
"That a boy, Jo-Jo. Give it to her hard!" Morris reached down and began sucking on my titties.
By now my legs were on either side of the kneeling giant as he angled the head of his dick between the lips of my sweet slit. I stared down at the monstrosity, unable to comprehend how he'd ever get it into me, squirming and screaming into Morris' ear.
"Get him off me. Please Jake. I... I'll do anything. I just--"
"Damn it, gal!" Jake raised his head from my titty. "How's a man goin' t'make you a lady with you screamin' and hollerin' like that?" Then he got to his feet and took off his pants. "Go ahead, boy. Jam it in her!"
Jo-Jo pressed it gently at first, as if he wasn't quite sure he should do it. At the same time Jake got down and straddled my up-turned face. "Suck it, gal," he commanded, pressing his big smelly cock against my lips. "Open yer mouth an' suck it!"
I tried to keep my mouth firmly sealed, but when Jo-Jo rammed his tool into my cunt I screamed but good. I just had to. Immediately Morris' prick was inside my mouth, filling it completely. I tried to escape, but there was nowhere to go. The pain of the huge cock crammed into my little pussy, and the gagging effect of Jake's dick in my mouth almost made me pass out. Helplessly, I tried to work with both pricks, wondering if they wouldn't meet somewhere in the middle of my pain-wracked body. Jo-Jo shot his load quickly, spraying me with his hot seed. The sound he made then was like a bull roaring in pain. I felt as if his cock had jammed its way up into my belly. There was no pleasure from the savage attack, only a raw aching, made all the less bearable for Morris' prick, pounding in and out of my throat. He came almost immediately afterwards. I almost threw up as his thick load streamed into my mouth, shooting down my throat, overflowing my lips and leaving a sticky trail all over my face.
As both men pulled away, I could see Jo-Jo's cock was still erect.
"Just look at that thing!" Morris pointed to the straining flesh. He spoke with pride, as if Jo-Jo were a special prize bull of his. "What you gonna do with that now, boy?"
At once Jo-Jo was back on top of me, ramming his dick up my aching pussy. Even though I was well lubricated from his come, it still hurt to take him on. His movements were slower now, more deliberate. I groaned as he fed his cock into my cunt.
"Let's put that pretty little tongue to work again, gal," Morris wheezed, once more moving his hips to my face. "Lick my balls!" he ordered.
I tried to move my face away, but his iron grip held me firm.
"Unless you want that sweet little face messed up, you do like I say!"
I flicked out my tongue in response, lapping at his hairy balls. Licking wildly, I moaned as my pussy stretched painfully around Jo-Jo's cock. I don't know how long it lasted, but I was aching all over by the time they were through with me. I'd been made to suck on Morris' balls and finally again made to eat his prick. I was covered with come, dripping inside and out with the sticky white fluid when they finally moved away from me. I dressed very slowly, every movement making the pounding in my flesh more difficult to bear. Jo-Jo was half asleep by the time I dragged myself out of the dismal cellar, and Morris was absently rolling a cigarette, looking like nothing at all had happened.
"You come back again anytime you want some more fun," he called as I wearily climbed the stairs.
All I could think about was a hot shower or bath and a long nap. I was exhausted, and the final phase of my initiation was still before me. But I stopped at Morris' words and glared down at him before leaving the cellar. "Men!" I muttered, disgust disfiguring my burning lips.
Morris' laugh was hardy. "You sure are adjustin' good to this place! Just like all the others!"
I hurried up the last steps and turned toward the school. I tried to erase the gardener's knowing remark from my mind. But down deep I couldn't help wondering if he was right.
CHAPTER EIGHT
I was awakened very late that night by Lizette and Janice. The flashlight was lit again, but this time it was their soft whispers which roused me.
"Let's go, Patti. We don't need the gag or anything this time, do we?"
I shook my head and even managed a smile at Lizette. I slipped on my robe and followed them into the hallway. Immediately the blinding light played over my eyes again. "Do you have to?"
"Yes, but this should be the last time," Janice answered, subtly reminding me that there was still a chance I might blow it and have to start all over again. Fat chance! I was determined to see this thing through to the end. This had to be my last night of pain! As I stumbled along I was grateful that the furious assault on my pussy had eased with my nap. I merely felt stretched, uncomfortable. The girls know how to give more lasting punishment, I found myself thinking. Before long we were again in the secret wing, waiting by the door. The light went out and the door opened. Inside, Barbara and nine others were waiting. All wore plain black robes except Barbara. She was dressed in blood-red satin and looked just like a high priestess. Along the walls small candles lit the room. A huge, orange-red floodlight focused its beam on the two leather straps that dangled down from the high ceiling above us.
"On your knees, slave." Barbara spoke to me as if she'd never seen me before. Immediately I felt my heart start to pound as I fell to my knees before her.
"Patricia Holland!" Her voice was a loud echo booming off the stark cold walls. "After a serious deliberation of your crimes against the sisterhood of Croix Hill, we, the Croix elders, have agreed to make you one of us."
The eleven other elders stood in a motionless row, their backs against the one bare wall in the room. I could see this occasion was really supposed to be sacred to them. Their faces, like Barbara's voice, were solemn. They all stood with their arms folded in an identical fashion-right over left, across their chests.
"When you have completed this evening's chastisement for your crimes against us," Barbara continued, "you will be pardoned and then looked upon by all as a full Croix Hill Sister." She bowed her head. "A sacred elder." Then, with something very close to hatred in her eyes, she stared up at me and clapped her hands. "Let... us... begin!"
Two elders broke away from the somber line and walked slowly, wordlessly to a long oak table. Very softly they began chanting something in dissonant voices, each lighting a long, wooden match. You could hear a pin drop as they lit new candles and trays of powered incense with the same ceremonial thoroughness. After that, the two returned quietly to their positions in the line against the wall.
"Doeth thou repent for thy crimes against the Sisterhood of Croix?"
I looked up, completely confused about which "crimes" she had in mind. "What crimes, Barbara' I... I don't understand...?"
Suddenly Barbara's voice broke into a frenzied whine as she uncoiled the whip from beneath her robe.
"For your sins ye shall be punished!"
I tried to escape, but Barbara and her whip were everywhere. The cruel lashes cut right through the robe and thin gown I wore. I screamed. I pleaded with her to stop, but she only stopped long enough to have some of the others remove my torn clothing while I continued pleading with her. Then she resumed her attack. She was relentless. Like a mad demon she backed me into a corner of the room, all the while continuing her remorseless lashing.
"Repent!" she screamed. "Doeth thou repent for thy crimes against the illustrious Sisterhood of Croix?"
"Yes!" I reached up, trying to protect my face. "I repent! I'm sorry! I repent!"
The silence that followed was finally broken by Barbara's voice.
"To the stocks with her!"
Three of the girls started to put me in the strange contraption on the far side of the room. I rebelled. I knew it was futile, but I was frightened out of my mind at the thought of what they might do to me once they got me in that thing.
At Barbara's command the eight remaining girls joined their sisters and I found myself carried bodily, then doubled over into a half-bent position so as to secure my hands and head in the strange device.
"Close your eyes, slave."
I obeyed her, knowing she was standing before me with the whip. She was just waiting to catch me laying to peek.
"Begin!"
Suddenly I felt hands all over me. Some soft and caressing, others pinching and scratching; a torment so curious my body was completely at a loss to know how to react. In spite of my futile condition, I found myself squirming toward and away from the fingered pleasures and pains as best I could. Then the real pain started. I cried out desperately as one of them started reaming my behind with a long cruel finger.
Barbara produced a small porcelain saucer and instructed me to spit in it and keep on spitting. "The fluid will be used to lubricate your rectum. The sacred saliva of an elder can never be used on one so lowly as you!" I obeyed.
I could feel my saliva being dripped down the crack of my bottom. The sticky feeling was unpleasant, intensifying my shame. Then I was told to open my eyes. I watched all twelve, including Barbara, circle behind me. Silently, one by one, they jammed their index fingers up my ass.
"Men fuck, men screw," they chanted in unison behind me, moving their fingers to the beat of the chant. "Only a woman makes love. Men fuck, men screw--" They sounded like a chorus of zombies as they continued chanting, finally marching around in front of me. Their faces were blank, as if they were in some kind of trance. Finally all eleven girls faced me in a semicircle behind Barbara. Each stood staring straight at me with the index finger of her right hand pointing up at the ceiling. Again Barbara's voice split the air.
"Get the new one!" she commanded.
Immediately four girls left the group and exited the room. Then Barbara turned to the group. She spoke softly for the first time that evening.
"It is the hour of sacred dedication. Which of you has a contribution for us?"
Janice stepped forward as Barbara handed her a plate. Then the girl left the group and entered a small room to the right and back of the stocks.
"The moment of sacred dedication," Barbara whispered. "Slave now proves her true devotion, purifying herself by consuming the sacred offering of an elder... " I was struck dumb by Barbara's words. Did she really expect me to eat that? Surely this was just some elaborate gag to see how I'd react. Otherwise, I swore they'd have to kill me first.
Janice returned shortly. Bowing, she set the plate at Barbara's feet as if it was some kind of sacred offering. Helplessly I stared up into Barbara's eyes. There was no need to look into the plate. I could see it in her eyes. Her thin face was victorious, confirming my worst suspicions.
"There are two ways to make a slave partake of the sacred offering of an elder." Her face was deadly serious. "Pleasant, and painful. We of the sacred sisterhood believe in free choice. Which shall it be, Patricia Holland?"
"B... Barbara," I stammered incredulously, "you... you wouldn't! Please. You can't!"
Immediately she walked up and slapped me across the face. I felt a thin trickle of blood seep down from my cut lip. "I am your elder! Nothing else. Nothing less. Call me that!" Slowly she regained her control. "Which shall it be, slave?" Her eyes stared ominously into mine as she uncurled her whip. "Pain... or... pleasure?"
I glanced at the plate, then back again into those cold blue eyes. There was no doubt in her mind. No feeling of remorse or reprieve.
"Barbara, I mean elder, I--"
"Then it's pain!"
I clenched my eyes as the cruel lash cut into my naked back. "No! Please! I choose pleasure! Pleasure!" I was stalling, but I was frantic to find a way out of my desperate situation.
"Indeed you shall," Barbara picked up the plate and advanced toward me. "And should you fail to get it down I'd suggest you take another look at that far wall." She pointed. "Those are torture devices, slave. And I look forward to using them on you till you swallow each and every sacred drop of the offering!" She shoved the plate just inches from my nose. "Do you doubt me, slave? Do you doubt my words that you shall eat this sacred offering?"
Her face was livid with the fury of her words. She... she was actually hoping I'd refuse so that she'd get a chance to use those other horrible weapons on me! I was sure of it.
Speechless, I just shook my head.
"Then eat!" she commanded. "Eat of this sacred offering!"
I could feel the tension in the room as I took a deep breath and closed my red-rimmed eyes. As I began, Barbara started chanting some words. Others joined her. Soon they were all chanting in unison again.
"The sacred moment of dedication--"
"Slave eats Elder's offering--" Afterwards they let me out of the stocks. I was really feeling sick. I guess I looked it. Barbara nodded, then one of the girls took me to the washroom where Janice had gone just minutes before. Inside, I puked my guts out. I wanted to stay in the little John forever. Yet I knew it was useless. There were no locks inside and at any time they could come in and overpower me again. But then, I asked myself, what did it matter? What more could they do to me?
Suddenly, in the midst of this hell, I longed for Gary. I wanted him with me, holding me, his lips tenderly on mine. The more I thought of his strength, his love for me, the more I was filled with longing for him. I needed him. I needed his gentle affection. I reached back desperately to reconstruct his image in my mind, but it was useless, hopeless. I shifted through my memories, trying to find something to hang onto. But it all seemed so long ago with Gary. So unreal-- Now the only reality for me was outside that door, dressed in long black robes, waiting. Slowly I opened the door. Surely there could be nothing worse... no horror greater than the one I'd already experienced. I stared groggily at the scene before me. Two elders were waiting for me, one on either side of the washroom door. They escorted me to a corner where I stood and watched with increasing disbelief. Struggling under the red haze of the ceiling floodlight, a young girl lay bound and gagged beneath the long straps that hung from the ceiling. Two elders were strapping her into a crude leather harness affair, while four others stood next to the wall under a complicated arrangement of ropes and pulleys. Aghast, I saw them pull the ropes, thus suspending the little blonde in the air above our heads. Swaying and kicking, her wrists tied behind her, she made these sickening little animal sounds as she tried to scream out her helpless protests.
Barbara extended her whip toward me. "Whip her!"
I opened my mouth, then closed it, suddenly remembering what I'd just been through. My heart began pounding fiercely as I closed my eyes. Then I reached out to accept the evil instrument.
"Whip her," Barbara began stomping her foot on the floor. "Beat out her evil. Let this slave suffer no more!" Rhythmically, she had shouted her feverish words into the air. Soon her chanting was joined by the others.
"Beat her!" they screamed. I stared at them. Their ghostly eyes were again filled with the same mixture of fury and fear. It was as if each of them was hanging there. As if they were about to be punished for their sins. I turned as the expression on Barbara's face grew even more menacing than before. She wasn't about to change her mind. Numbly, I swung my arm in the direction of the lovely little body, now tinted a ruby red by the floodlight, swaying in the air above my head. I heard the snap of leather against skin. I winced as I heard her moan. The screaming voices around me grew more intense, and the room spun dizzily as I pulled back my arm. Again and again I lashed out into the air. It was as if someone else was doing this horrible thing.
After a while I became crazed with her moans as they split the air above me. Half hypnotized by the elders, screams and stomping feet, I became accustomed to the knowledge that I was evil. She was so young. So soft, so completely innocent. I knew the girl. I'd seen her in the hallway just days before... gave her a friendly smile... liked her. Something was happening to me. Something was filling me with a growing excitement I'd never before experienced. I was in control now, and that control was absolute, unchallenged. I felt the heady sensation of pure power as I increased the strength in my arm, giving full vent to my need to lash into her tender flesh. How long I whipped Tina I'll never know. When I awoke the elders were seated cross-legged around me on the floor. The little blonde was no longer hanging in the air. She was right there, above me, sobbing and bathing my wounds.
My wounds! Tina, on her hands and knees, washing my body, cleaning the stench from my trembling lips with long gentle strokes of a soapy cloth. I gazed up at the faces circled around me. They were different now. Completely. No longer crazed with their former lust for pain, the eyes all seemed soft on me, filled with compassion for me, determined to have the little blonde bend to my every whim.
Barbara appeared as if from nowhere. She commanded everyone to rise. All obeyed, even little Tina. She caught my guilty glance at her and flashed me a quick little smile. Barbara's voice was hushed. Reverent. "You are now one of us, Sister. Welcome to the Order of Croix." She walked up and kissed my lips, then backed away, her face now radiant.
Then each of the others came forward and one by one, repeating her words, kissed my trembling lips. I felt terribly confused. They were all so... friendly now. Their smiles were sincere, warm. It was as if they now loved me. Each and every one.
Barbara turned to Tina. "You are now Sister Patricia's slave. You will do her bidding, obey her each and every request, cater to her every desire. Her slightest need is yours to fill... even without being asked. Am I understood?"
"Y... Yes." Tina's eyes blazed wide. It was as if she was lost in some strange, fantasyland movie. "I... I mean--" she bowed her head, "yes, oh Sacred Elder."
"Take her to your room." Barbara smiled at me. "She's yours now, to do your bidding."
I hesitated, unable to believe I was actually free to go. Then I thought of Tina. I thought of the terrible punishment I had dealt her. The senseless pains I had inflicted on her innocent body.
"Come." I turned to her, holding out my hand. She accepted it, her head still bowed. We walked to my room, with Lizette silently leading the way. At my door Lizette smiled, kissed me good-night, then faded down the darkened hallway.
"Well, Tina." I really didn't know what to say to the girl. It was obviously expected that she spend the night in my bed. "Let's go in. It's late."
Tina, still dressed in her thin nightgown, went directly to my bed. Pulling back the covers, she got in and waited. I climbed in with her and felt the warm blankets being tenderly draped around me.
The girl was shivering. I could feel the faint trembling of her body next to mine. It was somehow difficult to imagine her suspended in midair, cringing under my cruel blows. I reached out and gently took her in my arms. I wanted so much to comfort her, to soothe her, to ask her forgiveness. I stroked her lithe body.
"Oh, Patti!" She began to moan at once, her thin arms going around my neck. "I love you, Patti. I want to be your slave! I want to do everything for you... to you. I want to make you happy." Her hands began stroking my long hair, caressing my weary body. At first I was bothered by Tina's submissive love. Her eager acceptance of me as her master just didn't make sense. This was not some ugly game to the girl. To her it was terribly real, utterly and completely important. "You don't have to help me", Tina. You're tired, too. Why don't we just--"
"But I want to! I want to make you happy. Please let me! Please." Her fingers were now fluttering birds. They became soft and caressing against my breasts. Then she reached down and began to lift my gown. "Please--" she repeated urgently. "Please let me. I know how--" I felt her soft lips on my nipple, her little hands edging up my thighs. The sensation was curiously pleasant, loving. I thought for a moment of Gary's touch, but this was even more gentle. This feeling was one of adoration, of worship. "Yes... yes!" I moaned. "Make me happy, Tina. I... I command you to make me happy!"
Her little body trembled in eager anticipation at my words. "Oh, yes Patti... I will... I will."
Her tongue slid over my flesh. Hungrily, her silky-haired head ducked in between my thighs. I felt her tongue begin to lick at the fine hairs above my slightly open pussy. Sighing, I threw my head back into the pillow and opened my thighs still further. Her tongue was like a cat's, a precious combination of sandpaper and silk. It shot into my hole suddenly, lapping at the juices which were beginning to pour from my body.
"Yes, lick it, lick it, slave!" I cried out as the tongue lapped deeper into my cunt.
My hysterical words seemed to increase the young girl's excitement even more. I could hear her groans muffled against my oozing slit. She was sucking me good now, her mouth drawing my love juices out of me as if they were some exotic, sacred wine. No part of my pussy was overlooked. Even the long crack between the cheeks of my ass was anointed with her hot saliva. Before long I was reduced to a moaning, sobbing creature of raw sensation. "I'm coming," I groaned, wrapping my legs around her neck. "Take it... take it!"
Tina dug her fiery tongue into me for one long, last embrace. I rode the face furiously, willing to... wanting to smother her with my tremendous orgasm. It seemed to last an eternity. Wave after wave exploded through my thrashing body, yet through it all she maintained her position between my legs, riding me to my last pulsating quiver. Even then, her now gentle tongue pressed tightly against my flesh, as if to tell me she was mine forever.
"Stay there," I muttered sleepily. "I want you to stay like that... all night. You have made me... happy." I let my eyelids close as I drifted off to unconsciousness. "Very happy... slave."
CHAPTER NINE
My next days at Croix Hill were a complete reversal. My change in status seemed to be reflected on every level. Now the girls and teachers treated me like one of the in crowd, accepting me and going out of their way to make me feel welcome. I no longer went straight to my room after dinner. Now I was encouraged to join the others in the game room or the library. I was treated with respect, almost awe by the younger girls, and looked upon as an equal by the older girls. The various teachers seemed to vie for my attentions, though none of them had yet approached me openly.
Tina was with me always. She cleaned my room without being asked, carried my books from class to class, waited on me at meals, and was pathetically grateful when I allowed her to share my bed.
"It's a power thing," Barbara explained, noticing the look of satisfaction on my face as I watched Tina arrange my desk. "It's really a groovy sensation."
I had to admit she was right. I liked having Tina there, just dying to do whatever I asked. And I loved her agile tongue, working on me nights, bringing me again and again to ecstasy.
One night, after Tina's lips had spent an eternity sucking me off, I reached down and grabbed her. Impulsively, I began fondling her little butt. It was the same flesh I had just an hour before spanked with a hairbrush for some oversight of hers. Immediately Tina had begun to whimper at my touch. In the semidarkness her cute little rear looked so soft, so vulnerable, so inviting that I hadn't been able to resist the temptation to press my own lips against the dimpled, bruised flesh. Her white thighs parted at once and my tongue darted into her little hole even before I'd given it any thought. Her frantic moans excited me terribly; I was licking at her moist pussy like I'd done it all my life. Tina became almost insane with desire. Never in my life had I felt such absolute control over anyone. Her tiny clitoris grew hard in my mouth. I bit at the tender flesh and was thrilled by the girl's ecstatic groans. Without changing position or letting up on my own tongue-work, I pressed Tina's head once more against my pussy, and together we came in each other's mouths. I held Tina's thighs tightly as she orgasmed against me, delighting in my ability to so direct her reactions. There was nothing foreign to me about Tina's body any longer. It was mine, now, an extension of my own flesh, a plaything delightfully constructed just for my own entertainment.
I managed to push all thoughts of Gary to the back of my mind until the day I got his brief note. It was a carefully worded assurance that he would definitely "make it to mom's party tomorrow night."
"Tomorrow night!" It didn't seem possible! Gary would be waiting for me, ready to take me away from Croix Hill tonight! I looked hard at the postmark, checked my desk calendar and sank down on my bed, my knees suddenly feeling like water. It was Wednesday, the day I had planned to make my escape all right, and now it was here! Instead of elated, I felt confused again. I tried desperately to analyze my feelings. I was supposed to be excited, thrilled, relieved. Instead, I felt lost and confused. My attempts to reconstruct Gary's image in my mind turned into a dismal failure. His face was a paper-thin negative of someone I had known only vaguely. Could I really have changed that much in little over two weeks? It just didn't seem real. Not Gary, not my aunt... nor, for that matter, did my strange reluctance to leave Croix Hill seem real. I had a little time before dinner. I locked my door carefully. No longer did Barbara or any of the others presume to let themselves into my room. In fact the day after my initiation ended, Barbara and Lizette presented me with a beautifully wrapped package. Inside was an entire new undamaged selection of lacy undies and the key to my room.
I found my suitcase and began to pack for the big escape. Only my heart wasn't in it. I went slowly, picking out only my favorite clothing, trying to understand the change that had come over me. When I finished it was already dark outside. I'd have to hurry and finish if I was going to get down in time for dinner. Using a twisted bedsheet, I managed to lower the suitcase outside my window to the ground below. I took great pains to make sure it lodged in behind a bush. Then I stuffed some cosmetics and jewelry in my purse together with the money I had just received from Aunt Louise. I had received a farewell note from her on Saturday and with it was a check for one hundred dollars. That and the three hundred remaining from my parents' insurance that I had in a savings account in L.A. would tide me over for quite a while, I figured. It was funny, but now that the time had actually come, I realized that I hadn't really given much thought to what I would do on the outside. The school had become like a second home to me, a safe little womb, with weird but definite rules I had finally come to understand and accept. The freedom I had desired so desperately was now like a dark room to me. An unknown. More than once I'd stubbed my toes in a dark room. I hesitated as I considered the consequences of leaving. Aunt Louise was probably somewhere in France now, having a ball. It would be a good while before she even found out about my disappearance. Then she'd probably just turn the whole thing over to the police, so I'd just have to be careful to keep out of their way. I could stay at a hippie commune for a while, or even get my own little pad if I wanted. I'd get some kind of job, maybe, and I'd be able to see Gary all I wanted. Best of all, I'd be able to do whatever the hell I wanted, without anyone around to tell me what to do. I waited for some excitement to stir within me, for the anticipation to lighten the overtones of dread I was feeling. When nothing like that happened, I got up, dressed, then went down to join the others for dinner.
The meal was even better than usual. I stared at an inch-thick porterhouse steak smothered in mushrooms on my plate. Tina beamed at me from across the table, Barbara flattered me on my dress twice, and even Joycelyn, radiant in a simple white cocktail dress kept her lovely eyes on me throughout the meal. I had been chewing just a while when the tender meat began to stick in my throat. Looking around the table for a last time, I told the others I had a headache, then asked to be excused for the night. Tina got up to join me, but I excused her, claiming exhaustion. I got up sadly, pushed in my chair then left the room.
It was a quarter to eight by the hall clock. I faked heading to my room, then doubled back. Grabbing my purse from under a chair where I'd left it, I quickly darted out a side door.
The lights from the school illuminated the grounds only a short distance. Beyond was blackness. It was a chilly, moonless night. I went as fast as I could, carefully working my way over to the bush which hid my suitcase. I thought I heard the sound of a car in the distance but I wasn't sure. I listened for other sounds, but the night was as silent as it was dark.
Picking up the heavy suitcase, I headed for the back door of the massive school kitchen. There I would find a path leading down to a small side-gate I had discovered earlier. From there I could travel down the other side of the fence to the main road. Soon huge trees hid me from the school, and since I was really getting cold, I stopped to dig my jacket out of the suitcase. The wind was really starting up, blowing cold gusts of crisp air at me from all sides. Finally I had the jacket on and, teeth chattering, I snapped shut the suitcase and headed on down toward the road.
Finally I could barely make out the road. I was right on it but you couldn't see your hand in front of your face. Leaving my suitcase by another little gate, I felt my way down the fence to where I figured Gary would be waiting for me. It was so dark I almost bumped into his car, even though my eyes had been straining for its familiar, dented fenders.
"Gary!" I whispered. Then I was in his arms, wrapped up in his hugeness, warmed by his happy embrace.
"Patti! Wow! I thought you'd never get here." His voice was excited, and for some reason his boyish enthusiasm made me a bit uncomfortable. I shuddered with the cold.
"Shhh!" I managed to pull out of his arms before he got too carried away. "Let's wait till we get out of here, Gary. Someone... might come."
"Sure, baby. Jump in. Let's go."
"I... I left my bag up the hill. It's just above the bend in the road, by a little gate."
"Okay. I'll get it. You get in the car and keep warm. It's freezing out here!"
I just stood there for a moment, still trying to be sure I was doing the right thing. Then Gary's concerned face came real close to mine. "You... do want to split with me, don't you Patti?"
I just looked at him.
"I've got things arranged. You can stay with this chick I know from school for a while. Then we can get a place of our own."
"Sure, Gary," I said finally. "I want to go with you. Only hurry. Please!"
"I've missed you, baby." Taking hold of my hand he brought it down to his bulging crotch. "I've missed you like hell!" He pressed my fingers into his hardening cock.
Immediately I pulled my hand away, a trace of bitterness filling up inside me. Sure he missed me, but what part of me had he been missing? My hand on his prick? My mouth sucking him off? My hot pussy? Then I thought of Tina and her all-consuming love for me.
"What's wrong?"
"Hurry, will you!" I concealed my anger under a burst of impatience.
"Okay, okay. I'll be right back." He finally left for the suitcase.
I waited by the car until he was out of sight. Then I opened the door and got inside. The night was so still, so black. It was positively eerie! I was real careful in closing the door, but even so, the sound of the clicking latch sounded like a shot in the night. I slowly settled back into the seat, feeling grateful at least for the warmth of the car. After a while I thought I heard Gary's footsteps returning, but when I looked Gary wasn't anywhere in sight. Listening carefully, I could swear I heard footsteps outside. Close. It was like somebody was walking around out there. Yet try as I might I couldn't see a soul. I settled back in the seat, trying to force myself to relax.
Finally Gary opened the door on the driver's side and slid behind the wheel. "Got it!" He slid the suitcase in between us.
"Where the hell were you, Gary? Weren't you by the car a few minutes ago?"
"Just got here." He lit up a cigarette. "I had a little trouble finding that gate."
As he started the motor I turned back for a last look at Croix Hill. The engine caught, then died again.
"Damn it! I knew I should have fixed that carburetor before this!"
Gary kept cursing at the car while the sound of the grinding starter echoed off the surrounding mountains. "Can't we just... push it or something? Just till it gets down the hill?"
"Quiet!"
"Gary!" I jerked on his coat sleeve. "It's too noisy. It'll attract attention!"
Just then the engine caught again, sputtering and coughing as Gary flicked on the lights. "See baby," he patted my leg, then reached out and released the emergency brake, "you just got to have patience with old Suzie here. She--she--"
As the engine died a second time we found ourselves staring through the windshield at the primitive face of Jo-Jo. I had heard footsteps. It was him out there!
CHAPTER TEN
The cement room inside the hidden wing seemed much larger with just the two of us there. I looked up to meet Joycelyn's eyes, then stared back sullenly at the ground. She was wearing a dark purple robe and her hair fell loosely around her shoulders making her seem younger and more exotic than ever. "Why did you try to run away, Patti?"
"I--I--" What was the use. What could I say? The last half-hour had been a nightmare. Suddenly Jo-Jo was in front of the car, then Morris was opening the door, dragging Gary from his seat. It had been awful. Poor Gary finally drove off without me after taking a sound lecture from Morris about what it meant to help a minor runaway. I'm sure Jake probably hit him too, though by that time I was being dragged back to school by Jo-Jo. I pleaded with him, but if he understood my words the giant certainly gave no indication of it. Jake joined us later in Joycelyn's office, explaining to her exactly what had happened.
Joycelyn's lips were bloodless as she listened wordlessly. "Thank you, Morris, you may go now. Take Jo-Jo with you." Then she looked at me threateningly. "I'll take care of Patti here."
I had followed her down the winding halls without question. I had no idea where she was taking me until we reached the heavy iron door.
"Inside!" she ordered, unlocking the door.
She meant business. I didn't dare argue with her. I went inside, waiting for her in the center of the room.
"You're a fool, Patti. I expected more of you."
Her voice was so sad I began to feel ashamed of myself. "Well I--" Somehow, I couldn't quite bring myself to apologize to her. I'd tried to escape and failed. But I didn't have to humble myself before this woman. That was just asking too much.
"I see you have nothing to say." She started walking toward the wall of whips. "It's just as well. Words alone are no longer sufficient."
I gasped as I watched her take down a huge, wicked looking whip. She uncoiled it quickly and began walking back to me.
"Get undressed!" she hissed, flicking the whip in the air.
"But I-"
"Undress!"
The forked tongue of the whip shot through the still air and caught me around the middle. I screamed, doubling over from the shocking pain.
"Undress!"
Trembling, I got out of my jacket and dress. Shivering, I removed my slip more slowly. Wearing only heels, stockings, garter belt, panties, and bra, I then looked up at the woman. "Everything?"
"Everything." She lifted the whip meaningfully.
Hurriedly, I stripped off the rest of my things. Her eyes were like razors, cutting into my flesh as each garment came off my body. Then, as I stood naked before her, my breasts began to tingle, their little tips hardening. Never had I felt quite so naked, quite so revealed, not even when a dozen pairs of eyes had dissected my most intimate parts. I shivered as I waited, wishing she would begin, wishing she'd do to me whatever she was going to do, anything, anything at all. Nothing was as excruciating as being forced to stand nude before Joycelyn.
"Now you shall see what happens to impudent girls. By the time I'm finished with you, Patti, running away will be the furthest thing from your mind!" With that she lifted her arm and played the whip across my body. The first stroke was little more than a caress, only a shade more than a warning of things to come.
Joycelyn was a master of the whip. Slowly she increased the pressure, carefully gauging the ability of my body to withstand pain. It was as if she had one objective only; to bring me to the brink of madness, to the very extreme edges of agony while leaving my pale body as little damaged as possible. Even my screams, my pleas, my cries gave way under the onslaught of her whip. With Joycelyn, far more than when I had been made to eat the vile offering of the elders, I learned what it meant to be totally mastered. I passed out finally. It was my only escape. My flailing body was unable to take another blow as the merciful darkness claimed me.
I awoke slowly, cringing from the icy water being showered over my face and body. Even the shock of the cold didn't revive me completely. Joycelyn put down the silver ice bucket and had to half-carry me to the cot. The soft brown fur tickled my bruised flesh as I looked up at her. Her face was still frozen. An unreadable mask.
"You ran away to be with a man, Patti?"
"Y... Yes," I admitted, too frightened to not answer.
"Then I have a surprise for you. We like our girls to be happy here." She smiled queerly. "You don't have to run away to get- what you need. Why do that when we can provide it for you here?" She took off her robe.
Through the outline of her thin gown I could barely make out the contours of her perfect body. I held my breath as she began to remove the gown. She undressed as if she were alone in her bedroom. Each movement was unhurried, relaxed and graceful.
A small wrought iron lamp provided the only light in the room and Joycelyn was covered with half-shadows as she peeled off the gown. From where I lay on the cot I could only see the upper part of her body. Her long ivory neck was a beautiful column supported by the rounding contours of her creamy shoulders. My glance fell lower, grudgingly admiring the full glory of matchless breasts, large but firm, each topped by dark little rosettes. The delicate pattern of her ribcage etched a design through the woman's silky skin and under that, her waist was as slender as my own. Then she moved toward me, her tiny navel seeming like a decoration deliberately placed on her softly rounding tummy as if to stress the subtle span of her womanly hips. She paused near the cot for only a moment, giving me just enough time to notice her long shapely legs and the glittering treasure that lay between her smooth thighs. The curling black forest was a lush invitation to explore her most secret charms. I caught myself wondering about what she and Barbara did together. The pain and the outrage of the beating I'd just endured made me want to blot out such thoughts, yet still I watched the woman, even when she abruptly turned away from me and started again for the wall of whips. Her back was long and tapered, and the cheeks of her voluptuous ass swayed slightly as she moved.
"Now, my dear child, you will learn what these are for!" Joycelyn had her back to me as she spoke. Her hands quickly unsnapped something from the wall, then moved to her own hips. I saw her adjust what seemed to be flesh colored straps around her waist. Then she turned.
I must have gasped with surprise, for Joycelyn's laugh was sharp and triumphant. "I told you there was no need to run away. Here's just what you need."
The huge phallus swayed before her, covering the lower part of her densely-haired cunt. It looked oddly human, transferring her into a creature more man than woman. The rubbery length of the artificial cock was tinted a dark pink and the straps which held the contraption to Joycelyn's body were almost invisible. The effect was actually electrifying. Involuntarily, I brought my thighs tightly together. "What... what are you going to...?"
"I'm going to give you what you want, darling," she interrupted. "I'm going to give you what you were willing to leave those who love you for."
I moved back on the bed away from her as she advanced, the massive cock swaying with each step she took. "I'm going to give you so much of it you'll never need it again." She stood in front of me, one small hand encircling the thick shaft lovingly. "Now!" Her hands dug into the tender bruised flesh of my thighs. I winced and tried to escape further back on the cot, but her fingers bit into me even more ruthlessly. I moaned as I felt the hardness of the tip of the rubber cock press against my hole. I started to struggle, then I felt the silkiness of her flesh melting into my own.
"No, Joycelyn. Please!" My legs tried to close again, to dislodge the intruder between them. "No! I won't-"
"Too late!" Joycelyn hissed, her beautiful face now close to mine. "Now!"
Her hand reached down, directing the huge thing into me. I felt its knifelike head slip into my hole, hesitate, then plunge down to my very depths. I cried out, but I was helplessly impaled on it. Slowly I felt it being eased out of me, only to wedge itself into my pussy again with the next slow thrust of her hips. This was a woman riding my body, yet I was being fucked as never before; fucked slowly and thoroughly, fucked till my legs began to tremble and my arms shot up around my attacker's neck. Soon my protests had died away. I was unable to control the movement of my own hips as they began to sway with hers. I didn't want to enjoy what she was doing to me, but now I was powerless to do otherwise. Moaning, I took her rubber cock all the way up me, biting my lips to hold back the explosion I knew was on its way.
Joycelyn held me tightly as I came, plunging the prick into my hole with short, quick jabs. My body convulsed and I screamed one long scream. Then I let my head fall back on the fur, sighing as the spasm disappeared. Joycelyn still held me quietly, but only for a few precious moments.
"More," she whispered, beginning again to move the thing inside me.
"No. No more. Please. I beg you!" I was still weak from the enormity of my previous orgasm.
"I told you, darling, you're going to get so much... you'll never need it... again!" Her beautiful ass began to move faster.
It took only a short while before what had been ecstatic pleasure turned to extreme discomfort, and then to pain. I screamed, yet still she continued using the rubber cock on me. I was near tears when she finally pulled it out of me.
"Turn over!" she ordered.
I couldn't move. My limbs were sore, my thighs numb.
"Over, I said!" Her cruel hands forced me to obey. I flopped over on my stomach, too exhausted to protest.
Turning my head to one side, I watched her get off the cot and walk back to the wall. Unstrapping the prick, she returned it to its resting place, then reached for another somewhat smaller cock. Fitting it around her, she then disappeared into the small bathroom.
She was by my side again almost immediately. In her hand was a tube of lubricant. I knew what she was going to do to me then. "I... I can't! I never have--" I protested feebly, realizing that my words, my pleas, were meaningless to this woman.
Joycelyn didn't bother responding. Instead she uncapped the tube and squeezed a glob of clear jellylike cream onto her hand. I felt her fingers groping between the cheeks of my ass. Involuntarily, my muscles tightened. A stinging slap reddened my upturned buttocks. "Relax," she suggested softly. "Relax, darling. This is for your own good."
Her fingers were easing the sticky cream into me. There was no pleasure in what she was doing, but neither was there pain. I tried to relax. "Now."
The finger was suddenly replaced by the thick head of the second rubber cock. I moaned, but the pressure increased. Slowly the long shaft entered my tight little opening, filling me unbearably. I found myself wishing she hadn't decided to change her weapon of attack--never could I have taken the larger prick up my ass. But Joycelyn, as always, knew precisely what she was doing. I felt as if I were being stretched apart, split down the middle, impaled for the last time ever. I rose and fell with her plunges like a rag doll. Finally the pains had become unbearable. I began crying out threats instead of my useless pleas. "Stop it! I swear, I'll tell my aunt! I'll tell her everything! No one else will--" Joycelyn's laugh was harsh. My words seemed to speed up her thrusts. "You won't tell her, darling." Then she grabbed me around the waist and plunged the relentless cock all the way inside me!
I screamed, then bit down on my lips, making them bleed, until Joycelyn either tired or figured I'd finally had enough. She slowly withdrew the hateful tool and left me alone on the cot. I remained sobbing as she cleaned up and put everything neatly away. I'd managed to control my tears by the time she returned to the cot. She was still naked, but the glistening forest of her pubic hairs was freed of the offending rubber gadget. She sat down beside me, then lifted me in her arms with surprising gentleness. "You won't tell your aunt, Patti. And you won't ever try to leave us." I noticed she held a yellow envelope in her hand. "I picked this up from Western Union the day before yesterday."
I took the telegram and began to read.
"It happened between Paris and Nice." Joycelyn's voice was tender, yet matter-of-fact. "A plane crash. It was over quickly. You never liked her, did you, Patti?"
"No. I... I really didn't--" I read it again. I just couldn't believe that Joycelyn Deloffre had been appointed the administrator of my trust fund. It was funny, but my anger toward not only my aunt, but Joycelyn faded at that instant. I'd always disliked Aunt Louise, but now I found myself glad that if it had to happen, at least she had first gotten her dream of wealth.
"Oh, Joycelyn!" I didn't know how I felt, but I knew that from now on I was irrevocably tied to this woman and this school. The knowledge gave me an odd sense of security, of destiny.
Joycelyn took me in her arms again, her luscious mouth finding mine. Her kiss was gentle, loving. "You've been punished. All that's in the past now. I'll be so good to you, Patti... my Patti."
Her kiss was unbearably sweet. My tired body responded to it at once. Maybe it was the shock of Aunt Louise's death, possibly this new gentleness after the terrible cruelty, but I waited for whatever would come next with a curious quiet --I was so completely Joycelyn's now, so absolutely under her control that I simply ceased worrying any longer. I didn't--couldn't hate this woman. I couldn't even resent her. I was in a state of total acceptance. I knew before her lips touched mine again that I was in the process of sealing my own fate forever, and I welcomed this commitment. Her lips opened on mine, and then her tongue was in my mouth, seeking my own. I began to tremble, but this time with joyous anticipation.
"I've watched you since you arrived, Patti. Every day. I love you, darling." Her voice was husky with desire.
I looked up into her exquisite face. A great tranquility I had not. known since my mother died filled me. "I... I love you," I answered slowly. I realized this had nothing to do with saying what I believed she wanted to hear in order to buy a little time, a little peace. I knew I meant it.
Our lovemaking was complete, beautiful. My tongue worshipped her body and hers anointed my own. I sucked the little rosebud nipples until my jaws ached. I discovered the taste of every inch of my beloved's precious flesh. When at last my mouth, my tongue was permitted to explore the hidden crevices between her thighs I felt as if I'd discovered heaven itself. This was not a feeling of power, this wonder of making Joycelyn gasp as I worked on her with my darting, lapping tongue... this was a feeling of giving, sharing, fusing. We lay for hours, for eternities, locked between each other's thighs, unwilling to stand the thought of abandoning this oneness we had found. When I could no longer respond, when she could no longer endure another touch, we forced ourselves to part, still shuddering from the impact of the long series of orgasms each had evoked out of the other. We fell asleep in each other's arms, there on the cot in the room in which I had known so much pain, and had finally found the utmost pleasure.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
The next two weeks were the happiest I'd ever known. I felt freer than ever before, yet at the same time I was completely and joyfully in bondage to an all-consuming emotion.
Joycelyn explained the next day that while I was hers and hers alone, I was also still a part of Croix Hill, as was she. We had to continue living much as before. Although Tina or any other young girl who didn't belong to an elder was still mine to control, I was to answer only to Joycelyn from now on. That suited me fine. I thought back to the years of man hunger I'd felt before, but the whole idea now seemed incredible. A great happiness stole over me. It was a feeling of indescribable independence and strength. I thought of Jake and Jo-Jo and felt a twinge of pity. They, too, were a part of my past. Except to possibly use them someday in order to chastise Tina, I had strong doubts that I'd ever need them again. I was content. There were certain privileges to being an elder, and even greater ones for those who were close to Joycelyn. One day, after lunching with Joycelyn, I was lingering over a second cup of coffee in the back patio. She had rushed off to a meeting of some kind and I was enjoying real solitude. The trees were vivid with color, blushing their autumnal hues. My eyes were caught by an unusual cluster of bright orange leaves when I suddenly sensed movement within the bushes. "Patti! Psst!"
The bushes parted a bit and I found myself staring at Gary. "Gary!"
Startled, I got to my feet and, glancing nervously behind me, went nearer. "What are you doing here?" He was the last person I'd expected to see, certainly the last person I wanted to see.
"I've been waiting for days!" His voice was anguished. Then he smiled. "I was hoping you'd get outside eventually. When you didn't write... when I didn't hear from you--" He shrugged. His boyish face was strained, worried. "I didn't know what they'd done to you." Then he added, "I... heard about your aunt."
I felt my body relax a bit. "I'm okay, Gary.
I'm fine. This place really isn't as bad as I thought. I... I think I probably exaggerated it to you before. In fact, I kind of... like it here now." I felt like I was talking to a complete stranger. "I... I'm touched that you were so worried about me, Gary. Really. But it isn't necessary. I... I've just been busy, that's all. That's why I haven't written." I made a mental note to drop him a letter now and then. It seemed so strange, I'd completely forgotten about Gary. Forgotten about the entire outside world.
"Look, we can't talk here. Someone might come. Let's take a walk and--"
"I can't," I protested, suddenly not wanting to be alone with him. I just wished he'd go. I wished he'd leave me and the school forever. What had I ever seen in this boy? "I've got a class soon, Gary."
Then he got angry. "The hell with the class. I've been waiting two days to see you, Patti! I've slept in the car, I almost went out of my mind with worry!"
His voice was getting much too loud.
"Shhh!" I glanced around quickly. I had to get him out of there. If Joycelyn found him-- I shuddered at the thought. Maybe she'd think I'd arranged this, too. I wasn't so much afraid of what she'd do to me as what she'd think. "Okay," I said casually, "let's take a walk."
I led him away from the building, careful to avoid Jake and Jo-Jo's work area. We headed for the woods in back of the school, neither of us speaking until we'd reached a secluded little cove. Then he grabbed my hand and pulled me down on a carpet of leaves. "Patti! I've been half out of my mind without you!" His lips started closing over mine.
I turned my head. "Don't, Gary." I tried to think. "I... I'm nervous. Someone might come."
"Out here?" He looked at me carefully. "I doubt it. But I guess it can wait. Listen, the car's parked down off the road. It's out of sight. We can leave now. Can you get your stuff? If not, leave it. We can figure some way to get it later. The important thing is to get you out of here. The sooner the better." He looked at me searchingly.
I looked down at the ground. "I don't want to leave, Gary. I like it better here now."
"You've changed. Patti," Gary spoke softly, still studying my face. "The last time I was here I felt something was different. Something more than a... passage of time. I wasn't sure what it was and I'm still not. But I know this place isn't good for you. I'm getting you out of here."
"No you're not." I was getting angry. "Who the hell do you think you are, my father or something? I'm staying where I am. I'm staying right here with Joycelyn."
"Joycelyn? Is that the stuck-up looking bitch you were eating lunch with?" His eyes on me became even more penetrating. "What's going on here, Patti? Is she queer? She is, isn't she? Has she-"
"Don't you dare say anything about Joycelyn! She's the most beautiful, perfect person I've ever known." I was furious now. "And that includes you!" I wanted to get rid of Gary, but hurting him wasn't the way. Somehow I had to convince him that it was over between us. Once and for all. "You're right, Gary. I have changed. I found out who I am and what I want. I don't care what that makes me. I just want to stay here. I want you to leave me alone."
"So that's the way it is, huh? They've been turning you lez. That's the story on this dump, is it? I thought something was funny." Suddenly his eyes lost their anger. He became sad, depressed. "I don't think you know what you want, Patti. I think you're all mixed up. That bitch has been fucking with your mind." He grabbed my arm. "You've forgotten who and what you really are. But me, I... I haven't forgotten. Anything."
Then he reached around me, sweeping me into a strong embrace.
"Don't, Gary. I... I don't want it anymore. I don't want any man anymore. Don't you understand?"
His arms tightened around me. "Patti... Patti. You've forgotten, baby. That's all. Forgotten." His tongue speared between my lips as his hand, strong and insistent, fumbled for my breasts. His touch was familiar to me, yet strange. His lips were too unyielding, somehow, his body too tight against mine.
"Don't, Gary." I tried to pull away, but he held me fast. "Let me up! I have to get to class!"
"We're gonna ball, Patti. Get used to the idea." His voice was grim. "I'm gonna show you what you've been missing... what you think you don't want anymore!" His lips worked their way down my throat. I could feel his body hardening against me. "You see, I know you, Patti. Like I said, I remember."
"You remember a different Patti!" I cried. "You don't know me at all!"
My words only angered him. Impatiently he yanked at my skirt.
"Don't! You'll rip my clothing!"
"Then take it off yourself," he glared. "Stop fighting me or I will rip it. I really don't give a damn, Patti."
I looked at him. He meant it, all right. "Okay. Just wait a second. I'll take my own clothing off." I couldn't go back to school with my skirt in shreds. Someone might see me. They might guess. It would be easier just to give in to Gary, let him have his way. Maybe he'd realize what I was saying was true. Maybe he'd see his precious cock wasn't magic.
He looked at me doubtfully, then let me go. "Okay, get them off!"
His hands were poised, ready to grab me if I tried to run. Reaching down, I undid the button on my skirt. I made my voice conversational, unbothered. "Boy, you must be having a hell of a time getting any these days," I kidded. "I never thought of you as a rapist type. Just shows you, you never really know some people."
I skinned the tight skirt down over my hips. Then I bent over, scooped up the expensive garment and neatly folded it, placing it on a nearby rock. "Well, if you need it this bad--" I shrugged, my tone bored. Then I pulled down my minislip and put it with the skirt. "I don't mind helping a friend in need, now and then." I pulled off my panties. "Poor baby." This was almost fun. I wanted to hurt him. I didn't like being blackmailed into screwing. I never did. "Well, come on." I laid back and glanced at my watch. "I don't have much time. Let's get this over with."
Gary's flushed face revealed his anger. Yet he remained quiet as he undid his belt.
I stared at his unzipped fly. "Having trouble keeping hardons these days?"
"You'll see how much trouble I have!" His hand jammed up between my thighs, as if seeking the warmth there that I otherwise denied him. The hand was large and rough. Mentally I compared it with Joycelyn's smaller, smooth hand. I waited while he groped inside me, feeling nothing, neither pain nor pleasure, fear nor warmth. "Now don't take all day," I added in my best whore's voice. "Time is money, you know."
"I'll leave your fee on the nearest tree trunk," he whispered, catching on to my game and showing it.
The hell with him! He wouldn't be so smug once he saw how little his cock moved me.
Finally he got his pants off. He was hard again. Stiff and ready for me. I couldn't give him the satisfaction of "conquering" me. "I've heard that there's no point in trying to resist a rapist." I spread my thighs. "Hurry up. I'm getting cold."
Gary lowered himself onto me, his lips pressed tight in his effort not to lose control. Together we waged our silent war. Gary was determined to make me respond and I became every bit as determined to feel nothing. I'm sure he remembered how his cock had always affected me before. He just couldn't believe I'd changed this much in so short a time. He eased his prick into my hole, moving slowly and carefully, remembering accurately just how I'd always liked it. He used only the swollen head at first, working it inside then retreating, slowly teasing me just as he used to. It was all I could do to keep my mind off his cock as he began to plunge deeper, his palms cupping my bottom, angling himself deftly inside me. I found that my thoughts of Joycelyn helped. My body became numb to his arrogant masculinity. Still he pressed harder, unwilling to accept what should have been obvious by now.
"Take it," he muttered, himself excited by words which were meant to excite only me. "Take it!"
"I haven't much choice." I smiled coldly. "But that doesn't mean I have to like it." There was something exhilarating about this game. Talking this way was like dousing him with ice water. After a little more, his prick began to lose its hardness. I felt it soften and dwindle until it could no longer keep itself in my slit. Angrier than before, more determined than ever to consummate what was barely begun, Gary climbed up to my face and forced his cock roughly to my lips.
"Suck it!" he ordered sharply.
I could smell the fragrance of my own juices on him as his fingers dug into my hair. He was hurting me, pulling my hair. Resistance would do no good. Besides, I didn't want him to have the satisfaction of winning even a little battle. I began to suck the tip of his cock into my mouth. It hardened again almost at once. I continued sucking on it until he had maintained the necessary rigidity for a few minutes. Then I pulled away. "Think you can make it now? Or should I finish you this way?" My words were deliberately humiliating.
"Bitch!" Then he pulled me to him again, wasting no time. Immediately his dick had filled me and he began hammering away.
I kept my eyes opened all the way through the act, challenging him to meet them squarely. Finally he had to close his eyes to avoid the coldness in mine. I guess it had been a long time for him. He finally came, unable to hold it back a second longer. His body tightened against mine, his cock swelling before releasing its heavy load. He moaned once, then spasmed, clutching my body to his. I could feel his sticky venom spraying inside my pussy. Then I felt him slide out of me. My thighs were aching now, but I gave no sign of discomfort.
"Patti--" His voice was low, disturbed.
"What's wrong, Gary?" I asked condescendingly. "Wasn't I any good?"
Nobody spoke for a while and I looked up to see the sky darkening above us. Gary's mood seemed to have changed as he slowly put on his clothes. He seemed so quiet... so sad. Then I got up and began to dress. I wondered if maybe I had gone too far. After all--A sudden wind whipped against my thin clothing, chilling me. I remembered something Joycelyn had told me once, about winning the battle but losing the war. I began to shiver. It was getting colder.
"Patti--" The fury was gone from Gary's voice as he looked over at me. Everything seemed suddenly different, somehow.
I turned to him slowly. The sadness in his tone had affected me more than his anger ever could have. "Oh, Gary--" Everything was such a mess. After all, he was only trying to help me. Was it his fault he didn't understand me? I didn't even understand me. What was I doing? Why was I treating him like my enemy when all he wanted was to be my friend?
His hand on my arm was very gentle. "Is this really what you want, baby?"
"I... I think so, Gary. I'm pretty sure, in fact."
"I don't just mean what you've got right now, Patti. I mean is this really what you want for the rest of your life? You've got to think about it, honey."
His voice was so loving, so filled with concern. A great confusion welled up in me. I found myself blinking back sudden tears.
"Think about those pathetic women we used to see around Venice beach all the time. They don't have an all-girls' school to hide behind. Is that the way you want to end up. You know... you won't always have the school, either. I... I just don't want to think of you becoming that way. Even if we never see each other again."
My mind slipped back to our summer in Venice. I knew at once what women he was talking about. Those crude, half-men, half-women creatures who once had filled me with such disgust... was I going to be like that one day? I felt sick inside. Maybe I had been too hasty. Maybe Gary was right. Certainly I didn't want to end up like that! People staring at me... laughing behind my back. Where would I go after Croix? What would I do without Joycelyn?
"I just want you to give yourself a chance, Patti. You know, before making up your mind. I know this... wasn't any good for you, and that's as much my fault as yours. I was just in too big a hurry." He smiled sadly. "And the ground was cold."
I had to smile back, though I couldn't make out his face very well through my tears.
"Honey--" His earnest face was thoughtful. "Let's try it again. Not here. Let's go somewhere else and try, huh? I think you owe yourself that much. Please? It's an important decision for you."
He extended his hand.
I hesitated. I couldn't deny he was right. I hadn't tried to enjoy his lovemaking at all. It had been a grim game with me, a struggle to the death to defeat his masculinity. But in doing so, wasn't I also defeating myself? Was I being fair to either of us? Maybe I was boxing myself into a corner... a corner I'd have to stay in for the rest of my life.
"All right, Gary." I grabbed his hand and tried to smile. "I... I'll go with you now. Just as I am. I can't make any promises, but... I... I think maybe I have been a little hasty."
"Come on, baby." His face lit up. "You won't be sorry. I swear it!"
CHAPTER TWELVE
I glanced around the motel room uncertainly before sinking down on the soft lap of an old overstuffed chair. "Can I have a cigarette, Gary?"
"Sure, baby. Here." He lit two Luckies and handed me one.
I took a drag, then extracted a bit of tobacco from my lip. We had been driving for over an hour before reaching this isolated motel and we were sure we had not been followed. I'd spent most of the time lost in thought. Everything was happening so fast. I felt so lost again, so terribly alone. I looked over to Gary for reassurance He seemed to understand. "Everything's going to be okay, baby. Soon the whole thing will fade. Like a bad dream. I know it will. We need time, that's all. We'll go to L.A. later, find you a place to stay until the heat's off, kind of play things by ear for awhile. Then, in a little while, we... we can get married. I... I'd really like that." I smiled affectionately, but in my mind I was panicking. Married! I sure wasn't ready for that! I was confused, I was so... unsure, about a lot of things.
"I... I want to take a shower, Gary. First. Okay?" Actually the shower was just a delay. I needed time to think, time to find myself.
"Sure. It'll be good for you. I want you to relax. I want us to stop fighting." He leaned back and inhaled. "I'll be waiting for you, baby."
I escaped into the pink-tiled bathroom gratefully. Turning on the faucets, I let the hiss of the jets drown out the soft music Gary had turned on in the other room. I undressed quickly, hungry for the cleansing water, suddenly wanting to be purified somehow, or drowned. The steaming spray fell heavily over my breasts, turning my flesh a lobster red. I sponged myself carefully. It would be good just to feel for a while without thinking. Yet as hard as I tried I just couldn't hold back my tormented thoughts. I was so mixed up, so confused. I thought--I was so sure I'd found what I wanted in Joycelyn and Croix Hill. But I'd never thought beyond that, had never tried to envision my future beyond the next day. Gary had made me take a good hard look at that future, and I didn't like what I'd seen. Maybe I'd only convinced myself of something which just wasn't real... wasn't me. Hadn't I loved sex with men before? How could I have changed so quickly? How could I have forgotten all that? Sure, I loved what I'd found with Joycelyn, but who wouldn't, after the beatings and the loneliness. I just didn't know. But I was now determined to find out.
I finished my shower quickly, turned off the water, and stepped onto the furry bath mat. I noticed the full-length mirror on the wall as I reached for a towel. I appraised myself critically. My body, as always, was great. I crossed my arms over my full breasts, cradling myself against their softness. Then I ran a hand over my flat belly, letting my fingers tangle in the silky light hairs that laced my cunt. I was a woman, made for love, for children, for men. I was not one of those boyish, crude-looking types which seemed designated for lesbianism since birth. Yet... Joycelyn wasn't like that... and I had to admit, the others weren't either.
I toweled myself thoroughly. I just had to try! That was all there was to it! I had to let myself go with Gary, somehow recapture the Patti of before... I draped a dry towel around me, fluffed out my long hair, and opened the door.
Gary was on the bed, waiting for me. He got up at once, his warm eyes eating my nearly naked body. I walked to him uncertainly. "Do... do we need the lights?" I asked softly, feeling a bit surprised with my new shyness.
He grinned. "Not really." He turned out the little lamp and lowered all the shades, casting my body in softer shadows.
Then he took me in his arms. "I love you, Patti," he whispered. His kiss was infinitely tender.
I met the pressure of his lips, not resisting when his tongue slid into my mouth. The roughness of his shadowy beard felt like sandpaper against my face. I let my hands go up around his neck, mechanically allowing my body to press against him.
"We don't need all this," he said, beginning to unbutton his shirt. With his other hand he led me to the bed. My knees were trembling as I sat down on the mattress.
He undressed quickly while I clutched the towel to my breasts. His lightly haired chest seemed foreign to me now with its flatness and tiny dark nipples. I almost looked away as Gary worked to remove his belt. His hips were lighter in color than his tanned chest, the thickening pubic hairs standing out against the paleness of his body. Unconsciously, I glanced away when his big cock, already half erect, came into view. When I looked back he was kicking off his pants. I blushed as I noticed the funny way his huge balls swayed with his movements. There had been a time when his body excited me... when it was as familiar to me as my own.
"We don't need this, either." He sat down beside me, reaching out for my towel.
My hands tightened on the cloth, then I forced them to relax. I let him pull the towel away from me.
"Oh, Patti," he moaned, studying my body lovingly. His eyes and fingers caressed my flesh tenderly. "You're so beautiful... so beautiful."
I felt his lips on my throat, my shoulders, finally on my breasts. I held my breath until they circled a nipple, then captured it between his very white teeth. I closed my eyes then and waited for that warm, wonderful feeling to spark a fire in my belly. But nothing happened at first. Then I thought of Joycelyn, of her hot tongue lashing my nipples. The spark caught and held, but my mind screamed against it. I didn't want to feel something with Gary only because I'd thought of Joycelyn! Then I'd never know. His lips were working harder on my breasts now, sucking the little tips further down his greedy throat. Soft moans were the only sounds in the room since Gary had turned off the radio. I ran my fingers through his thick hair, trying desperately to remember how good it had always felt with him before. The bed was very soft, his body against mine strong and warm. Again I waited for the feeling I could so clearly remember to begin.
"Patti... Patti." Gary's hand made its slow, teasing way down my body, over my belly, molding my silky mound with his long fingers. He reached farther, stroking my thighs, taking his time, wanting... needing it to be good for me this time.
I was not immune to his touch, but it was yet nothing more than flesh against flesh, without that magic something which made all the difference in the world. I returned his kisses, welcoming them, wanting them to bring me to the place I so desperately needed to be. His tongue covered mine, coaxing it to respond.
"Just try to relax, baby." He placed one hand between my clenched thighs and used his other hand to bring my fingers to his prick.
It felt like a bar of steel lightly coated with foam rubber. I touched it, again aware of the odd mixture of strangeness and familiarity I felt. It was so much like seeing an old movie for the second time and wondering what you ever saw in it the first time around. His fingers joined mine as he changed position, bringing his lean hips between my wide-spread thighs. He guided it toward my barely moist slit slowly. I waited as he gently parted the folds of flesh, still feeling little more than a thin edge of hope--hope that the magic still evading me would suddenly reappear and make me normal once more. The swollen head of his cock was pressing insistently now, seeking blindly to find the entranceway to my body. I opened my thighs even more, moving my hips smoothly to help him get into position. Slowly I felt his thick shaft ease into my hole, the tender lips giving way to Gary's determined thrusts. He moved so carefully now there was no pain, no discomfort. But neither was there yet that wonderful flash of hot pleasure.
"Faster, Gary. Move faster," I urged, hoping that more movement, more friction would accomplish what I needed.
"Yes, Patti." He began to groan low in his throat. His hips rose and fell more rapidly, obviously feeling what I could not. A thin edge of jealousy, of resentment, passed through me. It seemed unfair that he should so easily find what I could not. I began to thrust my hips up to meet his, willing desire and eventual fulfillment to come to me.
"Oh, God, I love fucking you, Patti! I've missed it so much!" Gary ground his loins against mine, making me take every last inch of his rigid prick.
"Did you? Did you really?" I asked, hoping his desire would ignite mine.
"So much." His body tensed as he held back the explosion that threatened to overwhelm him. When he began to move again, his strokes were more measured, more cautious. "Put your legs around me, Patti... like you used to."
I obeyed, swinging my legs up and around him until my ankles crossed over his back. The pressure of his big cock in me was beginning to feel uncomfortable. His hips beat into mine smoothly. "Does it feel good, Patti? Do... do you like it, baby?"
"I... I--" I looked up into his loving face and couldn't bring myself to tell him the truth. I just couldn't! I couldn't hurt him that way. "Yes," I whispered, closing my eyes. "It... feels good, Gary."
I felt committed then, committed to live out the lie. Deliberately I forced myself to respond with more animation. "Fuck me, Gary," I panted, hoping my voice was convincing. "Give it to me good, darling." I wanted it to be good for him, at least. Besides, I thought, if only I were able to convince him, I might somehow convince myself, as well and feel something.
"Oh, yes! Yes!" Gary went wild in me then, stabbing at me furiously with his prick, digging into my velvety womb as if he could never get enough. "Take it!" he muttered gruffly. "Take it all."
I did, shooting my legs up in the air and grinding my hips against his. Now I just wanted it to be over with. I wanted his heavy body off of me. My eyes threatened to fill with tears. I bit down on my bottom lip, refusing to give vent to my disappointment. I thought of Joycelyn, of her arms... then I thought of her stinging whip. Better her chastising whip than this game, this pretense.
"Oh, baby... I'm going to--I can't hold back any longer." His voice was strained with passion as his cock plowed into me violently. "Here it comes... I'm going to... come!"
"Yes!" I encouraged, needing it to be over also. "Yes! Come in me, darling!" I pressed against him, flattening my breasts against his hairy chest. "Now!"
I held him as the spasms shook his body. In my mind I apologized... to Gary, to Joycelyn, to myself.
Gary shuddered once more, then, after a quick, tired kiss, rolled off me. His arm was still warm around my shoulders. He breathed deeply. "Was it good for you?" he asked finally, his voice hushed and concerned.
What could I say? He didn't deserve to be hurt, and I could do nothing but hurt him. I decided to push that moment off as long as possible. "Yes, good," I lied, my voice soothing.
"Very good. Just like it used to be."
We kissed again. His eyes were dreamy, half asleep. After spending a night in his car and balling twice in one day, Gary was already half asleep.
"Yes--" His eyes began to close at once. "We'll be so... happy, honey," he mumbled.
I let him hold me until he was fast asleep. Then I slowly disentangled myself from his embrace. I stared up at the ceiling. Gary had put my head on the future... but what kind of a future would I have with Gary? A future of lying? A future of waiting for a magic day that never came? And what kind of a life would it be for Gary? Maybe my future with Joycelyn wasn't so secure. But whose future was, really? Did my mother think her future was going to be any dream, just because she married my father? Did Aunt Louise think she was also buying a one-way ticket to happiness-ever-after? Good luck! I eased out of bed and into the bathroom. I showered quickly, more to wash this day off my flesh than because I needed time to think. I had thought. I had made up my mind.
I dressed rapidly. When I let myself back into the other room it was getting dark. I moved in on tiptoe, praying Gary would remain asleep. It would be so much easier that way, easier for both of us. I found paper and a pen, then retreated back into the bathroom. Turning on the light, I began to write, choosing my words carefully.
---
Dear Gary, I'm sorry, but I had to leave. I lied to you before. It wasn't any good. Not for me, anyway. And sooner or later you would know. Then it wouldn't be any good for you, either.
I'm borrowing your car. Just to get back to the school. I'll try to get it back to you before you get up. It was the only way I could get back, and I don't want to be here when you get up. I hope you understand.
Please forget me. It's best for both of us.
Patti
---
I left the note by the bed stand, rummaged through Gary's pants for his car keys, and slipped out of the motel room. I started the motor quickly, glad that I'd had a semester of driver's training. Fortunately there wasn't a cop around. I drove carefully and to the side, slowly picking my way back up the twisting mountain road.
It was very dark by the time I reached the school. I parked down the road a ways, then walked to the main gate. I braced myself before entering the building.
Dinner had long since been over. I could hear noise from the game room. I decided to go directly to Joycelyn's room. She was bound to know I was gone by now. I'd take my punishment... and love it. I was home again.
Joycelyn listened to my story impassively. She hadn't said a word since I'd first timidly knocked on her door. I left nothing out, finishing with my realization that I now knew what I wanted and that I'd never leave again.
"I'm glad to hear you say that, Patti. But we must make sure of that, mustn't we?" She got up. "First--" I waited while Joycelyn made a quick call to see about the return of Gary's car.
I followed her down the hall docilely, for the first time knowing we were going to the secret wing. I felt a curious thrill at the thought. Besides, I had no choice.
Meekly I walked to the hanging straps and waited.
"That won't be necessary this time, Patti. Take off your clothing."
I obeyed. When I was completely naked she asked me to follow her to the wall of torture implements.
"Pick one," she ordered coolly.
Surprised, I looked at her to see if she was serious. She was.
My hand started for the thin coils of leather, the mildest of the assorted whips. But then something stopped me. Instead I selected the braided whip. "I deserve this, Joycelyn. Beat me with this one."
A look of approval slowly came over her face. "Very good, Patti." She took the whip from my hand. "Yes," she murmured as she began to undress, "very good."
Her lush body fascinated me as always. She looked so strong, so masterful, her firm breasts pointing toward me, her evil whip still coiled in her fingers. "Now?" she asked, raising the leather and letting it snake out behind her.
"Yes," I cried, offering my body to her exquisite vengeance. "Now!"
The lash descended, but instead of cringing, I held myself up for its brutal kiss. "Oh!" I groaned. Yet somehow the pain was far less important than the sense of relief I felt. "Yes!"
The forked tongue of the whip cut into my soft flesh again and again. Each time I met its attack willingly, almost gladly. "Yes!" I screamed back at her. "Beat my sins out of me!" I fell to the cold floor as the whip licked at me again and again. "Beat me!" I cried. "Beat me!"
Joycelyn fed me the lash until I was a mass of welts, until I was unable to bear the pain any longer, until I was sobbing and seemed cloaked in a sheet of stinging agony. Then and only then did she toss the weapon away from her and kneel to my tortured flesh.
"Thank you," I whimpered up at her between my sobs.
Her hands on me were like a healing ointment. Everywhere she touched the pain seemed to turn to pleasure.
"You've been a bad girl again, Patti. But never, never again will you leave. Don't you know you're mine? Don't you know you'll never be able to leave me again?"
"Never," I repeated, resting my weary head on her exciting breasts. "Never again."
I leaned back my head and hungrily captured a dark nipple between my dry lips. I sucked as greedily as a starving infant. Immediately I was caught up in the power, the beauty, the magnificence of her flesh. My mouth strained to take in as much of the luscious breasts as I could. I wanted to kiss and lick every precious inch of her body. I wanted to completely humble myself before this woman.
She gently pushed me away, then got up, took the brown fur from the cot and spread it on the floor. Then, looking more like a goddess than a living being, she arranged herself on the fur, her dark hair spilling over the cement floor. "Worship me, Patti," she ordered softly.
And I did. I used only my lips, my tongue... even my fingers seemed too crude to idolize her loveliness. I ran my slightly opened mouth over her neck, over her entire body. Every inch of her was gratefully savored by my tongue. I saved her dark mossy mound for last, fastening my mouth to her most sensitive parts only after first covering the rest of her with my kisses. She began to moan as my lips sucked eagerly between her legs. It was like retreating into the dark forest of life itself. Never had I wanted anything as much. Never had I wanted to bring to anyone this infinite, exquisite pleasure, at the same time knowing fully that this pleasure would be reciprocated a thousand-fold. I buried my tongue into her, loving the taste, the texture, the perfume of her body. I was like a crazed animal, like an insatiable creature of lust. I couldn't bring myself to release her, not even after she begged me to let her go. I was determined that she should taste ecstasy time after time after time.
"Please! Oh, God, Patti... darling... I can't take any more!" She moaned, her thighs arching, thrusting against me. They were stained with the juices of her passion and I turned my head and licked at them once again before gluing my sucking mouth against her pulsating cunt.
Hours seemed to pass. Nights. Eternities.
Finally I was able to stop when Joycelyn, with a sudden determined burst of energy moved swiftly around me, reversing her body so that her tongue could also dig into my sopping pussy. She brought me to one quick and violent orgasm, then another, and finally, another. Weak and exhausted, I had to let my aching tongue slip out of her beautiful body.
We remained on the floor the rest of the night, unwilling to move from each other. Even the coldness seeping in through the rug did not rouse us. We merely clung together, my bruised and agonized flesh satiated as never before.
"And the next time a man comes to rescue you?" Joycelyn smiled knowingly into my eyes.
"Man?" I sighed contentedly. "What's a man?"
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
The weeks that followed were a fantasy of pleasure and excitement.
Two younger girls were scheduled for initiation this evening, and for the first time since I returned I was permitted to take an active part in the ceremony. It was really an education. I learned the exquisite pleasure of waking a girl in the middle of the night, gagging her, collaring her and dragging her trembling young body down the twisting hallways. It was so much more than a sense of power. Much of my satisfaction came from knowing that in breaking down her petty will I was, at the same time, elevating her to incredible peaks of pleasure and purity. Each girl eventually begins to find the peace, the security which, under their uniformly permissive parents, they would never have known. Many of our girls are punished for the first time in their lives in the secret wing, and almost on the spot are able to do penance for their miserable sins, thereby leaving behind then-burdens of guilt forever.
"Doeth thou repent?" I screamed at the new girl. The whip felt alive in my clenched fist. I gave her no time to answer. It wasn't necessary. She would repent now--and find the reasons later. That was the way it was done here, and daily I grew to appreciate the wisdom of such thinking.
Finally allowed to share the major leadership decisions with Barbara, I learned to love the feeling of wielding the strap across soft young female flesh! My breasts would begin to tingle, my nipples harden, my belly tighten as I cracked the whip through the air. It was as if someone were running a tickling hand between my juicing thighs. With each initiation my excitement grew boundless, beyond anything I'd ever known before. Because I'd learned to respect the whip and all it meant, I now was able to totally accept the beatings I suffered at my mistress's hand. Joycelyn punished me only when necessary, and each time I grew to bend to the whip if not actually to revel in it.
"I'm very pleased with you, darling," Joycelyn smiled. I'd gone up to her after she'd finished beating me and I'd been kissing both her hand and the whip. "You're my finest student." She ran her hand gently over my welts. "You've learned which things are really important."
Joycelyn and the school itself were the only important things in my life anymore. The school was my womb, Joycelyn my lover, my life, and my mother. The outside world needn't exist any longer for all I cared. I worked hard to help keep the school running perfectly, eventually functioning more like an administrator than a student. I was the one who thought up the idea of throwing a dance to celebrate midterm week.
"What a groovy idea!" Barbara was enthusiastic.
"Well... I don't know." Joycelyn was hesitant.
"Why not? Who would know? There isn't anyone within miles of this place. Oh, please, Joycelyn! Other girls get to go home for a week this time of the year, and some of the younger girls are getting kind of restless. We could use the main room with the big fireplace. Maybe we could even put on some entertainment--give some of Miss Burns' better students a chance to show off what they've learned. Please?"
I knew Joycelyn particularly loved to watch the girls dance. The one class she "observed" with any regularity was modern dance. The naked bodies swaying in time to the music excited her terribly.
Later, alone in her lovely bedroom, I pushed again for the dance.
"Let's talk about it... afterwards."
I smiled and fell into her open arms. This is what I loved, this "price" I would pay to win her over.
Afterwards she agreed. Just as I knew she would.
The next day Joycelyn, Barbara, and I went to the nearest large town to buy special treats for the dance. While Joycelyn was buying decorations, Barbara called me over to the other end of the store. She pointed to a row of liquor bottles. "Shall we?" she asked, smiling mischievously.
"For the punch."
"Sure. Why not?"
"But you're not old enough."
She grinned. "Patti, my dear, I've had a false I.D. for years!"
I smiled back at her enthusiastically. We selected several bottles of vodka, purchased them, and slipped the package into the back seat of Joycelyn's car. The dance was going to be a huge success. I was just sure of it!
We worked for days on the main room, decorating the huge, stuffy room until it actually looked quite cheerful. We also hurried through our remaining initiations so that all the girls would be available. This way every student in the school would be a full member of the sisterhood by the night of the big dance. We'd have a one-hundred percent attendance! Three of the best students of modern dance agreed to stage a show for us. It was to be a take-off on Salome's veil dance, and I was sure it would be just the thing we needed to get our little party off the ground. I planned it as kind of an icebreaker.
The one thing that had always bugged me about Croix Hill was the way everything was carried off secretly. It was as if no one was willing to admit what was really going on. I planned to change all that. After all, we were miles from anyone. We were a world unto ourselves. We could make our own rules. I planned the dinner personally. A huge roast and all the trimmings, baked Alaska for dessert, and a fruit drink that was going to be slightly spiked with the now hidden vodka. That would be just a warm-up for the stronger brew Barbara would later mix into the punch.
The night of the party everyone was dressed to the teeth. I wore a floor-length black velvet hostess gown, a figure-revealing thing which showed off my body at its best. I'd brushed my hair until it gleamed, then painted my long nails silver. I felt as if I had complete control of both myself and my little world. It was going to be a wonderful night, that was for sure. A glorious night for one and all.
The dining room was lit only by candles. The food came out perfect, and each girl looked more radiant, more beautiful than ever before. The teachers and office staffers were also dressed to the teeth, yet everybody was relaxed and friendly. I looked across the room at Joycelyn. She was smiling back at me. Her dark hair was swept up in a bun and silver earrings the same metallic shade as her gown twinkled from her earlobes. Nervously, I watched until she had tasted the punch. If she noticed anything unusual about it she didn't show it. I wondered what she'd be like drunk. It was impossible to imagine Joycelyn without her poise, her perfect, cool control. It looked like a good night to find out. It was a beautiful night, cold and cutting, with snow threatening to fall any minute. The mountains beyond were already well frosted, magnificent in their icy aloofness. The stars were gigantic in the black sky, the entire setting contributing to my feeling that Croix Hill was a separate world, somehow happily cut off from the rest of mankind.
After dinner everyone drifted into the main room. I'd personally selected the music which would run the gambit from the latest hits to, much later in the evening, slow, dreamy, romantic pieces.
Barbara's special well-spiked punch was now sitting in a huge cut-glass bowl, surrounded by cups and trays of little Italian cookies. I thought everyone should just generally relax before we brought out our special dancers, so I had the lights turned down low and the setting was perfect, the crackling fire beginning to spread its glow and warmth throughout the large room.
"Come on, Barbara." I took another sip of her strong but delicious punch. "Let's not waste this music. I want to dance!" I took her in my arms and we began to dance.
The others hung back for a few minutes, then Janice nodded to her "slave" and the two of them joined us. Soon most of the other girls were well fortified with the potent punch. Two by two, they began to join us. Miss Burns was the first of the teachers to join us. I noticed she picked out the silver-blonde as her partner.
Tina hung back, looking lonely. Explaining to Barbara, I broke away and took the little girl into my arms. This was the first time since I was a kid that I'd taken the lead on a dance floor, and also the first time I really enjoyed the role. Tina's little body felt absolutely wonderful pressed up against mine. When the music ended I told Tina to get herself some more punch. Then, after filling two cups, I went over to Joycelyn who was sitting regally on a plush velvet chair, watching the dancers.
"Would you dance with me?" The music started again.
Joycelyn sipped from the cup I gave her. "Not yet." She smiled. "But I probably will." Then she looked at me knowingly. "After another cup of this punch."
I smiled back at her. "Drink deep." I lifted my cup in a silent toast. Joycelyn responded, then we sat back together and watched the others. I noticed Miss Edwards, the Guidance Counselor, holding Janice tightly in her arms. Their hips were crushed together as they moved in time to the music. They seemed very familiar with each other. I thought back to my visit to Miss Edwards's office after the first night of my initiation. I could hardly believe it had been me, carrying on like a homesick infant. I'd have to make it up to Miss Edwards one of these days. Looking at her face as she danced with Janice, I knew just how to go about it, too.
"They're beautiful, aren't they, darling?" Joycelyn's eyes were soft as her gentle fingers touched my wrist.
"Very beautiful," I agreed. I thought of a book I'd recently read about Sappho. I recalled bits of her poetry and wondered if life on the Isle of Lesbos had been anything like this. If so, it must have been everything a woman could want. I started thinking again about my hang-up with men in the past. Joycelyn had talked to me about it only a few days before.
"In the outside world men represent power," she'd explained. "It seems to me, the only way to be as powerful or more powerful than men is to conquer then, on a physical level." Her eyes clouded over. "I had a husband once. He was very powerful. A rich man. Defeating him was--" She shook her head and paused. When she spoke again her voice was calmer. "Here all that is nullified. Here we have created our own Utopia. A Utopia for women."
She was right. Thinking about it now, I realized that whatever power women on the outside did manage to have over men derived solely from pleasing those men, usually sexually, disappeared just as soon as the man found himself a new plaything. My own father, for example... Why else would he have left my wonderful mother? She was beautiful. Yet even she'd told me men weren't to be trusted. Until recently, of course, I hadn't known I'd had a choice.
"Looks like we're running out of wood." Joycelyn's voice broke through my thoughts.
"I'll get Morris to bring some more in." I noticed her cup was empty. I picked it up with mine. "I'll get us a refill too."
As I moved through the dancers I noticed the booze had really begun to hit me. I found myself fighting this crazy need to stop and kiss each female I passed. Finally I made my way to the intercom and reached Jake at his room. "Bring in a lot of wood," I instructed. It was going to be a long party. I refilled our cups and headed back to Joycelyn. The lights seemed dimmer, somehow, the girls even more tightly entwined in each other's arms. In one corner two young girls were kissing passionately. No one seemed to pay any particular attention to them. It was just as well.
"Thank you, darling." Joycelyn's face was flushed. In my absence someone had brought her another cup of punch. The other empty cup was on the floor by her feet.
I grinned. This was indeed an excellent night to relax completely. Forget about everything except having a good time! None of the others seemed able to hold their liquor any better than us. And what did it matter anyway? Nobody would remember or care tomorrow.
"Dance with me now, Joycelyn?" I pleaded.
She got up slowly. "Yes." She smiled as she held out her arms to me. "I'd like to do that... while I'm still able."
The music was now soft and romantic. "After this we have the special dancers." I fell into her arms as she took the lead and spun me away from our seats. She was a wonderful dancer, as I knew she would be. The others seemed to relax even more, now that their headmistress had really joined the party. Joycelyn's body, so intimately against mine, excited me now as always. I was breathing rapidly by the time the dance ended. I needed something to get my mind off her. Signaling to Barbara, I dimmed the lights after getting everyone to sit in a semicircle around the room. I made sure there was enough space for the dancers in front of the fire place.
Barbara turned off the hi-fi and made a motion for everyone to quiet down. Then she gave the little speech we had prepared.
"Now for the evening's main attraction. A performance by three of Miss Beth Burns's prize students! Here they are, Julie, Michelle, and Lynn, with their version of--Dance of the Seven Veils!"
Everyone applauded softly.
I angled the soft red light we'd rigged, directing its beam toward the center of the room.
Julie came out first, her waist-length red hair covering more of her adorable body than did her costume of silky veils.
The music was Ravel's Bolero, a favorite of Joycelyn's. It started very softly then began to build as Julie began moving around, her hair fanning out as she went into a series of graceful spins. The red and orange scarves twirled out also, exposing her long legs with their creamy thighs. Julie's exquisitely rounded body looked naked under the skimpy veils. Everyone was staring at the lovely girl as a sweetly curving breast became partially revealed during every consecutive turn.
I took a sip of the new cup of punch someone brought me. It tasted even stronger than the last batch Barbara mixed. I became a bit worried. She must have added still another bottle of vodka to the bowl. I looked around, but Joycelyn was drinking hers without a word, her eyes glued to the beautiful young dancer. I decided I was just getting excited over nothing. As the dance progressed, the music grew louder, more compelling. Michelle and Lynn, the other two dancers, had moved in beside Julie. They, too, wore only the silky veils. I glanced around at the reaction of the audience. The onlookers were spellbound, their eyes fastened to the stunning bodies of the nearly nude dancers. A few, however, were lost in their own embraces.
I noticed Lizette, leaning against a back wall, her lips glued to the mouth of a younger girl. Her hands cupped the other's naked breasts with wild abandon. Even Miss Burns and the silver-blonde were similarly occupied, twisting against each other as if they might fuse together at any second. Satisfied, I reached over and took Joycelyn's hand. Tina appeared on my other side. I put my arm around the cute little blonde's waist and hugged her to me. It was beautiful. I felt so warm and loving toward everyone.
The three dancers were now twirling more rapidly, their flaring veils revealing increasing amounts of their flawless pink flesh. They were nude under the scarves, yet it was somehow more exciting to wonder and anticipate than to have had the girls come out naked at the very beginning. Julie reached up and undid the veils that held her breasts. Her little mounds were tipped with rose-colored nipples, swaying proudly as she moved. The other two also removed their scarves, revealing their breasts completely. Michelle's tits were fuller, higher than Julie's and her nipples under the red light were the color of wine. Lynn's breasts were tiny, with nipples like a boy's. Although they barely moved as she danced, in her own way she was just as exciting as the others if not more so. Half naked now, the three girls began to move more rapidly, always in perfect time with the music. A fine film of perspiration coated their flesh, giving their bodies the look of flawless marble tinted with a lifelike ruby power under the hot orange light. One by one the girls began to drop the veils which covered their loins as they circled the room. Finally only a thin strip of flame-colored ribbon was left to mask their most secret flesh.
Couples were embracing more openly now, watching the dancers between long kisses. In the shadows I could barely make out the white flash of the silver-blonde's thighs as they clamped together around Miss Burns's head. By this time Lizette had pulled the new girl's dress down to her waist. She was avidly sucking one tender nipple while testing the other with her agile fingers. Another couple, a teacher and a dark-haired older girl, were feeling each other's bare nipples, their eyes never wavering from the dancers before them.
Julie smiled seductively, then reached down to remove her final veil. She tugged at the wisp of orange slowly, teasingly, sure that all eyes were on her alone. The veil came off her like an explosion, flying like a puff of smoke through the haze. Along with the others, I stared at the swollen triangle of her sex. Her perfect little mound was dusted with golden-red hairs, sprinkled lightly with sparkling silver glitter. She stood still now, facing her audience, her lovely face catlike and eager. Then very slowly, she began stamping her little foot while at the same time grinding her naked hips in time to the beat. The effect was hypnotic. Every eye was locked to the rotating cleft of her little pussy.
Suddenly Miss Sarnoff, the Spanish teacher, stepped into the center of the room and fell to her knees before Julie. She was very drunk. Her short silver hair gleamed as she lunged forward and dipped her face up and in between Julie's parted thighs. She began to lap at the girl's cunt furiously, not giving a damn about her attentive audience.
I felt my face go hot. My grasp on both Tina and Joycelyn tightened. Occasionally, a few heads would turn toward Joycelyn to see how she was reacting to this burst of wild passion from one of her teachers. Joycelyn's eyes, however, were as hot on the spectacle as anyone else's. Her hand in mine was getting slick and feverish.
Miss Sarnoff pulled Julie down to the floor as they became half-hidden under a heavy floor-length drape. Now, only Julie's delirious moans remained with the music.
"Let's see the others!" someone cried out. Two older girls rushed forward and stripped the veils from Michelle and Lynn. These two were likewise quickly claimed and removed from the center of the room. Suddenly couples everywhere began embracing and shedding their clothing. Eventually the music was all but drowned out by a chorus of passionate sighs and groans. I felt Tina's hand stealing into my lap as my own face began working toward Joycelyn's magnificent breasts.
One young girl, giggling drunkenly, began to stagger toward the center of the room. She was pulling someone. Lifting my head from Joycelyn's breast, I gasped when I saw it was Jo-Jo she was pulling. His primitive, childish face was flushed, his huge arms loaded down with firewood. The girl was grasping him by his naked cock which now stood stiffly at attention.
"Look what I found!" she giggled. "He was watching the show from the doorway. Poor HI beastie. He needs some lovin' too!" The girl sank to her knees and began sucking on his big prick.
Jo-Jo grunted, his face redder than ever. Then he closed his eyes, obviously enjoying this sudden attention. The firewood swayed in his arms as some of the others gathered around to watch.
Getting up to close the door, I noticed Morris was also in the room. He'd dropped his load of wood by the fireplace and was quietly appraising the flesh around him. "Hey, li'l gal," he addressed a beautiful Eurasian girl who stood smiling nakedly before him, "What about me?" I looked around from the door just as his cock was disappearing into her hungry mouth.
Returning to our corner I watched Tina busily working at the buttons on her dress. She couldn't seem to free herself of it fast enough. No sooner were her things bunched around her tiny ankles than her hands flew to my clothing. I let her undress me, my head fuzzy, my heart pounding with my terribly suppressed excitement. No longer able to contain myself, I turned to Joycelyn and began to edge her gown up over her beautiful legs. Almost everyone was completely naked now. Girls struggled in twosomes, threesomes, and little groups, fondling each other and themselves, licking each other's bodies, thrusting fingers up inside whatever female they could reach. One girl was fingering herself in a corner. She was on her back, completely absorbed in her solitary pleasure until another girl came to her and squatted down over her upturned face. She was accepted joyfully. Another couple, sixty-nining furiously, was pulled apart to become part of a chain of frantic bodies, each with their faces buried in the next girl's cunt.
As soon as Tina had my panties off she began licking my pussy. The sensation was overwhelming. Groaning and begging her forgiveness, I thrust my finger deeply inside Joycelyn's beautiful hole. I spread her thighs, intending to sink my face into her fragrant flesh.
The music was completely drowned out now, by an assortment of groans, sighs, and gasps. The Bolero recording was playing over and over, but no one cared. Everyone was lost in a sea of flesh, drowning in sensations too intense to resist. Down on my knees, I began to lower my face into the dewy nest of the goddess above me.
I heard this distant sound of shattering glass, followed by rough masculine cries of amazement. Still the cries of shock and disgust didn't break through to my awareness until I looked up.
There, surrounded by a carpet of splintered glass stood Gary and two other boys.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
I just couldn't believe it. Shakily, I pushed Tina off me and got to my feet.
Joycelyn sat rigidly in her chair, her gown hiked above her waist, her fragile panties in a roll about her ankles.
I shook my head, hoping to clear it. This had to be a dream or something. Gary and his friends couldn't be standing there. It was no dream. You could hear a pin drop as the rising hi-fi music was suddenly stilled by Barbara. Gary and I stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity. The other boys glanced around the room uncertainly as if they too were having difficulty believing what they saw.
Finally I took control. "Why are you here, Gary?" I blinked at him as my spinning head began to clear.
"You know why, Patti." He seemed unreasonably confident. "I couldn't let you go like that." He took a step forward, at the same time raising his voice. "You're confused, that's all, Patti. Mixed up. I knew you didn't mean what you said... what you wrote in that note."
"You fool!" I hissed at him. "I meant every word! How dare you come here! How dare you think you know what I want better than roe!" I was shaking with fury.
Gary's face reddened. "I swore I was going to save you," he said simply, "and I am." A strange, determined look came into his eyes. "I'm going to save you, Patti, in spite of yourself."
My rage almost blinded me. I dosed my eyes. "Get out of here, Gary." My lips compressed after each word. "Get... the... hell... out... of... here!"
"You just don't realize what they've done to you. To me." He stared around the room contemptuously. "To us!" he screamed. "I'm getting you out of here!"
I don't even remember moving toward him. All I remember is the terribly satisfying sound of my open palm smashing into his cheek. "Get out!" I shrieked. "You... you're crazy!" My naked body began shaking uncontrollably as I reached up to claw his face. His hand darted out and smashed me across my cheek.
"Don't let him touch her!" somebody yelled, "Stop him!"
Gary's heavy slap had knocked me to the floor. I looked up just in time to see Jo-Jo and Morris snapping out of their sensual daze. They got up slowly, yet in seconds Morris's hammer like fist was closing in on Gary's face. Obediently, Jo-Jo started for the other two. I remember screaming right after that, then I must have blacked out completely.
When I came to all hell had broken loose. Naked girls were yelling and screaming and running wildly in all directions. Jo-Jo was slowly and methodically pounding one of the boys with his fist while the other boy tried futilely to tackle him from the rear. The boy might as well have bee:! a flea, for all Jo-Jo cared. In the corner, Morris and Gary were still at it.
Looking around, I noticed the firewood had become scattered where Jo-Jo had dropped it just moments before. A few of the logs were quite near the fire. It took me several seconds to realize that they were in danger of igniting.
As if reading my thoughts, the boy who was unsuccessfully trying to pull Jo-Jo from his friend also glanced toward the fire. Then he ducked to one side and picked up a burning torch from the fireplace. I just stared, my eyes wide in amazement as the boy swung the burning log toward Jo-Jo. I screamed as the burning torch ground into the retarded giant's back. Roaring like a wounded lion, Jo-Jo turned, letting the unconscious boy he had been beating slide to the floor. He leaned down and grabbed the flaming torch, looked at it with pain and confusion, then angrily flung it over his shoulder as he spotted and advanced on his new adversary.
I glanced over at Joycelyn. She was still sitting rigidly, her wide eyes wild, entranced. A naked jungle beauty calmly watching her empire slowly explode around her. By the time I looked back at the others, the torch Jo-Jo had thrown was licking at the heavy drapes which lined the wall of the ancient building. Before I could yell out a warning the entire set of drapes was a wall of flame. I screamed at the others as the flaming tongues shot up to the ceiling to claim the dry, decaying wood of the old mansion. Slowly others became aware of what was happening and they too began screaming as Gary and his friends tried and failed to rise from the smoking hard-wood floor. Jake and Jo-Jo quit trying to fight the flames as a fiery beam fell from the ceiling, completely cutting the men off from the rest of us.
I remember huge clouds of smoke coming at me; Barbara pushing me out into the freezing winter night... my hysterical efforts to get back in to help Joycelyn... Tina...
I remember standing naked outside, shivering with the others, listening to the screams... the distant sound of crackling, popping wood.
I remember wiping tears from my eyes as I watched the raging inferno consume the old building. It seemed to be welcoming the lapping flames... an anxious witness to its own destruction, finally fulfilling an ultimate destiny planned Long before I entered this world.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
The expensive limousine was surprisingly comfortable as it floated smoothly over the unpaved road. I strained my eyes, but it wasn't until we made a series of turns before I could catch a glimpse of the old mansion I'd heard so much about.
Several months had passed since the holocaust of Croix Hill. I had been taken to the hospital and given a sedative which knocked me out for twenty-four hours. It wasn't until they allowed Barbara to come to see me that I learned of just how horrible the entire night became. Of us all, Barbara and myself were the only students to survive... even dear, devoted Tina had been consumed in the fire. I hoped it had been a merciful death; I remembered reading somewhere that people in a fire usually are overcome by the smoke and pass out before the flames themselves sear their flesh. I hoped so... poor Tina.
"And... and Joycelyn...?" I hesitantly asked Barbara. I was terrified of what her answer might be.
Barbara put her cool hand on my arm and squeezed gently. "Jake," she muttered as if still plagued by the memory, "Jake... he... he was all on fire... every part of him like a human log."
"But Joycelyn," I repeated, trying not to imagine how awful the scene must have been.
"He'd wrapped something around her, under her arms... he lived long enough to drag her out, to the lawn... the flames just beginning to lick at the material he was tugging her with. He... he finally couldn't stand it, I guess. He threw himself on the lawn and rolled and rolled, screaming."
I waited... too sick to even dare to hope that my beloved Joycelyn could possibly be still alive.
Barbara shuddered, closed her eyes tightly, and with visible control forced herself to relax. "I ran over and stamped out the flames that were headed toward Joycelyn. She'd taken in an awful lot of smoke into her lungs... they've got her here at the hospital under observation."
"She-" Barbara nodded slowly. "She'll be all right. Some pretty bad burns on her legs. The doctor says she'll probably have some scar tissue, but not enough to disfigure her. Knowing Joycelyn." Barbara paused with a wry smile on her lips, "she'll have plastic surgery take care of that. For Joycelyn to endure any kind of imperfection would be about as likely as an alcoholic blowing up a brewery!"
I had to rest then. I fell back against the pillows and tried to ignore the triphammers in my breast. My darling was safe; my mentor and guardian... my lover. How I longed to go to her and comfort her.
Barbara stayed another few minutes telling me of the complete destruction of Croix Hill, of the routine questions from the police and fire department. No one had commented on the nudity of all the corpses... the clothes would have been burned off anyway. Being Barbara, however, she didn't withhold anything and even told me that when the wind was just right she could still smell the charred flesh even in town. Then she went on to tell me that she'd made arrangements to attend a Swiss finishing school for a year; she had "learned her lesson" as she put it, and wanted to see if she couldn't try to return to a normal life or at least, some semblance of normalcy.
But I was only half listening by then. I was so very tired, and so terribly relieved to know that Joycelyn was all right. Let Barbara go, I thought, to hell with her and her self-righteous ideas. Normalcy! What was it? It was only what most people did or thought... but did that make it right? On the isle of Lesbos, it was "normal" to be a lesbian; couldn't the fools see that normalcy was no more than a locale, a regional difference in attitudes? If you're living with cannibals, it would be abnormal not to eat humans; if you're starving, you'll steal. It would be impossible to pass a judgement on a way of life, even on Barbara's or society's. Was Joycelyn's training at Croix Hill so much worse than my Aunt Louise's hypocritical pursuit of fleshly pleasures? I had learned the hard way, yet now embraced the truth. I enjoyed the discipline, enjoyed the torturous sweetness of a woman's touch, her kiss. If flagellation and lesbianism were scorned by others, it could only be because those others had never learned to give of themselves completely to someone else. Everything came full circle to the old "don't knock it if you haven't tried it." And just trying it once isn't much help... look how long it had taken me to be won over to Joycelyn's way of thinking. Like learning to play an instrument, one had to practice until it was mastered.
I didn't need the world, or the Garys in it... I only needed my mistress, my master, my Joycelyn.
Then, the voice of the driver reminded me of the present, and where I was. Of this long, lovely ride and what was yet to come.
"I'm sure the old Maddox house will be ideal for your needs." The suave-voiced real estate man sounded confident. "The size is right, the location ideal for anyone who really wants to get away from it all; why, there isn't a town for twenty miles in any direction." He paused for a breath. "And the countryside in this part of upstate New York is the prettiest anywhere. Don't you ladies agree?" He glanced back, then caught us in his rear-view mirror.
I smiled sweetly at the middle-aged man. "It sounds just perfect, Mr. Baker. And the price seems quite reasonable, don't you think so, Auntie?"
One look at the old mansion convinced us quickly. As we drove through the huge iron gates I smiled at my "aunt", squeezing her hand in my mounting excitement. Her eyes were glowing. "This is indeed a perfect spot for Croix Hill II." Joycelyn returned my smile. Her voice, as always, wan calm. "I like it."
