In this my latest work in the field of teen age sexual experimentation I have endeavored to reveal hitherto unknown facts and aspects related to young girls and their first sexual experiences.
It was, to say the least, a most enlightening experience. I have found in many cases that young girls are often more willing and able to speak freely of their sexual encounters than boys are. I have also found that young girls will not try to hide the facts and, more importantly, they will not pad the facts either as some boys are prone to do.
In fact I have found them as a whole to be more responsive to questions and always eager to please the interviewer in his search for knowledge.
My theory for this is twofold. Firstly I feel that young girls do not have that pressure put upon them by their peer group to be the first ones to experiment in sex. They are in fact not pressured at all.
Secondly the fact that I am an older man greatly influences their ability to speak freely to me.
Rather than seeing me as an enemy they regard me as an older father figure, something most of them, as far as I can see, had never had.
It is with the greatest of pleasure then that I present you, the reading public, with my latest research in this field of young female sexual development.
CASE HISTORY ONE
Subject: Carolyn Adams Age: Fifteen
INTERVIEW ONE
This young lady had a rather strong sex urge right from the onset of puberty. However, her own parents were ill-informed in sexual matters and could not give her the advice and guidance that she badly needed. She was a confused child with strong urges that she could not understand, and the need to satisfy them overwhelmed her.
Having been raised with some concept of good moral behavior, but also being told that anything referring to sex was dirty and vulgar, she felt that her urges were something she had to control and that they were somehow dirty.
Her body was healthy and there was no denying them.
"I've always been proud that I'm a pretty girl, and that my shape has turned out rather well. I just don't understand myself and some of the things that go on inside me. My parents were never much help in that direction.
They never explained anything about sex to me in a way that would make me understand my own needs and cravings. All I ever heard was rules about what I wasn't allowed to do and how sex was such a dirty, bad thing.
My father was even tougher than my mother. He warned me that if I ever let a boy fuck me, he would beat me up bad enough to put me in the hospital, and they would never let me come home again. My girlfriends have told me they were threatened like that too, but if you ever heard my father talk, you would know he means business.
He always bragged to me about how he never put a hand on my mother until after they were married, and he was damn well going to make sure that I went to my wedding in the same condition. All I was allowed to do was kiss and not one thing more.
But he never told me that I would want to do more and have to fight it, or what to do with a boy who seemed to have ten pairs of hands. What do you say to a boy who has a hard-on and no place to put it? It's natural for him to want a little more than a kiss, isn't it?
Sometimes after a date, we would drive somewhere and park. I was going out with this one boy a lot, and he was a couple of years older than me. I really dug him.
It was kind of tough to put a limit to the amount of stuff we could do, and even kissing got pretty hot and heavy sometimes. When he would hold me close and I would brush against his body, I could feel his cock, hard and stiff in the front of his pants. He would really struggle not to force me into anything, but I could tell he really wished he could fuck me.
I kind of wished I could let him do it, because I wanted to be that close with him too. But I was afraid to let anything happen. I wouldn't even let him finger me inside because I thought he might break my cherry. If my father ever found out, he would kill me and I wouldn't even have had the real thing.
So all kinds of kissing was the best I could do. I would let him unbutton my blouse or pull up my sweater. Then he would unhook my bra and I let him kiss my breasts. Now I don't think my father would exactly have put his seal of approval on that stuff, but I never told him about it. He had already made life tough enough for me.
I really enjoyed what he did to me. It was pretty groovy the way he would suck on my nipples and roll his tongue around them. But it made my nipples get so hard and stiff, and then for a long time afterward, my breasts would ache. Whenever he did those things to me, my cunt would start to itch and it would get very wet down there.
But it was even worse for my boyfriend. He would always get a hard-on that refused to go down, and he said the cramps he got down there were pretty bad. I always felt terrible for making him suffer like that, and I wasn't too happy about the way I left hanging either.
I was desperate, and my mind was racing around looking for something more I could do with a guy and still get away without having intercourse. Kissing was the only thing I was allowed to do. So then I started to do some heavy thinking.
Maybe kissing other places on the body besides the mouth and breasts would be all right. I really thought about it one night while my boyfriend was soul-kissing me with his tongue buried really deep in my mouth. I wondered what it would feel like if he would put his tongue in someplace down below and maybe wiggle it around in there. After all, that would still be kissing.
You see, I had to make a lot of my own rules. I couldn't go asking my dad any of this because I was sure he would say no. But even worse than that, I was sure he would say I was filthy and vulgar. Then he would punish me.
That very same night I asked my boyfriend if he would tongue-kiss me in my cunt. But he had never done anything like that before, and he wasn't sure if he would dig it.
It wasn't until I promised that I would kiss his prick for him that he agreed. I had to be the one to get it all going, so I hurried up and pulled off my panties, then hiked my skirt up around my waist. Then I spread my legs for him.
In the small space of a car like that, it wasn't easy to get ourselves in the right position, but finally we managed it. We even managed to get around that dumb steering wheel.
Finally, after a great deal of trouble, there I was on my back, facing opposite from him with one of my legs thrown over the seat. I stretched the other one out of the floor. All that was left for him to do was to put his head between my legs. After a little bit of coaxing from me, he did it.
It was a first for both of us, and neither of us was sure of how to go about it. Inspiration took us pretty far, though. The first thing he did was to kiss me along the inside of my thighs, gradually working his way towards what was waiting in the middle.
I was shivery and quaking wherever his wet mouth touched me. Finally he got to my mound and he kissed that, too. I guess the smell and the taste of it must have turned him on, because he put a lot more vitality into it after that.
He started licking my cunt, then spread it open with his fingers so he could stick his tongue deep into my slit. Then I realized all the great kicks I'd been missing until then. I had promised that I wouldn't fuck until I got married, but until then stuff like this would be a very good substitute. I had never felt anything that great in my life.
It took my breath right out of me, and my heart was beating so fast I thought I was going to die. All of me felt warm, but my cunt was actually hot and sopping wet. Pretty soon I felt myself have an orgasm for the first time. I just shook all over and then I felt all this wet stuff coming out of me.
My boyfriend was pretty patient with me, I'll say that much for him. He waited until it was all over. Then he told me that it was my turn, and he was waiting for me to get started sucking on him. With the wild thing that he was doing to me, I had forgotten all about it.
I wasn't really in the mood anymore. But I knew I would have to give him what he wanted, if I had any hopes of getting him to eat me again. And that was something that I wanted very much.
It was a lot easier to work on him than it was for him to do it to me. Once he opened his pants, it stood up straight and hard, just waiting for me to go down on it. All I needed to do was bend over, then start to suck and lick at it.
It was the first time for me too, but it seemed like something that was very easy to learn. I must have started doing it right from the very start, because I didn't hear any complaints from him.
But it tasted a little bad to me, and I didn't like the hair getting into my nose and throat. The whole thing was kind of turning me off, but I knew I wasn't being fair to me.
So I just started remembering the groovy feeling I had when he was eating me, and that got me all hot and bothered again. From then on, I had no trouble giving him all the licking and sucking he wanted.
I was kind of glad that I did it for him, because after a few minutes, he came. I just managed to take my mouth off it in time, and he had a tissue wadded in his hand, all ready to catch the stuff coming out of him. Then we both sat up and talked about it.
We discovered that it wasn't bad at all to go down on someone. But we also discovered that it was much more kicks to have it done to you.
For the next couple of months, we did it pretty much the same, each taking turns. Then we started talking about trying sixty-nine, but we never had a chance to get to it. School was over then, and his parents moved from our town.
I always had trouble trying not to giggle when my father was around. Every time he asked me if I was still a virgin, and if I ever let a guy get into my private, I could always answer yes. I guess it never occurred to him to ask me if we ever did the eating thing. He probably never even heard of it.
But as long as he felt that his little girl was still a virgin, he seemed to be happy and didn't ask me any other questions. It's a good thing, he didn't. Because some nights I would come home feeling so good about the kind of sex I was having with my boyfriend that I would have been happy to tell him all about it."
INTERVIEW TWO
^
'After my first boyfriend left town, I took a while before finding another one. A lot of them were into heavy fucking and they knew I wouldn't go along with that. Things went along with a lot of trouble, until my girlfriend arranged this double date for me.
We went over to her place one night when her parents weren't home. In a few minutes she disappeared into the bedroom with the guy and I was alone with someone I had just met. So we just kind of talked and stuff, until I heard all kinds of noises coming from the bedroom and I got up to take a peek.
There was this guy standing up and kind of leaning against the wall, with his prick all hot and hard, sticking straight out in front of him. I only got to see the full length of it for just a second.
Because that was all it took before my girl friend knelt right down in front of him, and facing him, opened her mouth and took his whole cock right into it. I stood staring while her head kept going back and forth on it. The guy had his eyes closed and he kept mumbling all kinds of things.
It was the husky, kind of sexy tone of his voice that seemed to hypnotize me there. I was almost in the door, for trying to get a better look at what was going on. It was my date that finally broke my trance.
He asked me if I liked what I was watching, then suggested that we should really leave them alone. I was almost relieved at the suggestion, and followed him back to the living room. That was when he produced this bottle of whiskey and. asked me if I wanted to try some.
I was so nervous that I didn't refuse. It was getting pretty late and I knew I would be in big trouble if I didn't get home on time. But the whiskey started working on me right away, and I quickly forgot about the time.
We started to talk again and he asked me lots of things about myself. I tried hard to keep up with the conversation, but my mind was still back in the bedroom and I wondered what she was getting out of sucking his dick for him. Maybe they were past that now and he was starting to eat her out.
I couldn't help wondering if she got the same kind of kicks out of it that I did. I was pleased to find out that I wasn't the only one who went in for that kind of stuff, liked it. He could tell how distracted I was and finally asked me if I was still thinking about what I had seen. I couldn't help but admit the truth. Then he just smiled and turned on some pretty music.
We started to kiss then, and in no time we were into some pretty heavy petting. He kept moving his hands all over the outside of my clothes. It wasn't like I had never done any of that stuff before, but it had only been with the one guy, and even though I needed it so badly since then, I had managed to control my feelings.
Now he was making me want it all over again. And I was afraid to let go of my self-control. I was afraid that if I got started again I would never be able to stop. He seemed to know that I was a little afraid, but he must have thought that I'd never done anything much before.
He backed off for just a little bit, saying nice things to me, then kissing my cheek, my neck, then my shoulders. Every time his mouth touched my skin, it was like he was setting off a dynamite charge on the spot.
I was starting to get really hot and bothered. He knew it as well as I did. But I also knew that I wasn't quite ready to let go of my control. He sensed I was hesitating for some reason, but he couldn't have known what it was. So he forced himself to be patient.
He didn't touch me very much, but instead he slid all the way down my body. Then he knelt down at the end of the sofa and started to kiss me all along my legs. This was something totally new for me and I started to feel better immediately He was turning me on in a way that I couldn't hold back from. It got to feeling better and better, especially as his lips made their way up along the inside of my leg. I was getting to feel like I was with my old boy friend again.
It was beyond my stopping it all now, and I got to hoping he would do what I was now hoping for. I just closed my eyes and kept wishing for it as his kissing lips moved slowly up along the inside of my thigh.
They continued up along my stockings and towards my throbbing crotch ... I thrilled as I felt his lips tasting the tender parts of my flesh. It wasn't until the next morning that I remembered I had helped him along by pulling my dress all the way up so he could get to me.
Things were going along pretty fast now, and before I knew it, he had tugged aside my little lace panties, and wetly closed his mouth over my sex. I almost jumped out of my skin as his tongue moved in and flicked across my clit.
It was all over for me then. He could do anything he wanted to me, and I would gladly do anything he wanted me to for him. One flick of that long, wet tongue on my aching clit and I was his slave.
You don't know how much I wanted to be his slave. He wasn't asking me to do anything right then. All I had to do was lay back and enjoy it as his mouth and tongue slowly and totally explored every part of my sex organs.
In spite of myself, I pushed my hips up to meet his stabbing tongue, then held on to his head to keep him at his work. I had one orgasm, and then he kept right on until I had another one.
Finally I was so worn out that I had to push him away from me. He came close to me on the couch, and I kissed him tenderly. I was very grateful for everything he had done. In fact, I felt so good about him that I explained how I felt about oral sex and how much I appreciated what he had done for me. I even told him about the stuff I had tried before, then about my father.
He said he understood why I had been so nervous and all. Then he said he was sorry for making me so uptight. Then he explained, that right from the beginning he had learned that giving was a big part of making love.
I started to feel a little guilty then. He had done so much for me, and I hadn't given him anything. It didn't take me more than a second to decide what I could give him in return. The picture of what I'd seen my girl friend doing in the bedroom came flashing back to me, and I remembered what I had learned in a parked car. It all seemed so right to be doing it now.
With a big smile on my face, I asked him if he would like me to suck his cock for him. I just came right out and asked, and I felt very good about it.
He seemed a little surprised at first. I guess he didn't think I knew about things like that. Then he said that he really would like it, but only if I wanted to, not because I thought I had to do it.
Of course, I really did want to, now more than ever before. As much as I had found it a kick before, now I knew I would give it my best try. I got down on my knees in front of him and unzipped his fly.
His cock was good and stiff already, I took it out and held it tightly in my hand. I was pleased that it was a nice big one. It even smelled sweet and clean.
It had suddenly become something to be loved and pampered in my mind ... a way to show a guy that you really dug him. Before I had only thought of it as a way of getting what I wanted. Now I wanted to give. I wanted to give so much.
So I held it against my cheek, then rubbed it all over my face. I showered the dark head of it with tons of kisses, then trailed my tongue all over every inch of it. I don't know which one of us I was teasing more.
Finally I couldn't stand another minute and I took the whole thing into my mouth. I sucked on it deeply, moving my head up and down with a steady rhythm. I closed my lips around the shaft and held it tightly in my mouth, wanting to give this guy as much pleasure as he had given me.
The good feeling I had while doing it to him was more than a feeling of sexual pleasure only. It was the wonderful feeling of knowing that I was giving something of myself in affection to someone that I really dug. Someone who had been very good to me.
It was something I had never known before, and it made me feel very grown up in a great hurry. The whole world changed for me then. Sex stopped being a game. I guess it was my father who made me think of it that way in the first place.
All he ever told me was that it was a bad thing, and that you didn't do it until you were married. He made it into something sort of mystical that way. And he confused me so much.
I kept going back and forth all the time in my mind. One minute I needed it badly and could only think of games like sucking cocks in order to get what I wanted. The next minute my father's warnings about sex being dirty would come back into my head and half of the pleasure would be kicked right out of it.
Most of all what I resent is that he never told me that sex had anything to do with love.
According to him, they were two separate things. If all parents teach their daughters the way mine taught me, I'm not surprised that there are so many divorces.
Here they guys are all horny and they want all kinds of sex. They read it in books. They see it in movies. And their fathers encourage them to be big men by scoring as often as possible.
But it's those same fathers who tell their daughters that sex is a dirty thing and they aren't supposed to do it. Well, who do they expect the boys to do it with? Don't they know those boys are going to go after somebody else's daughter?
Then here we are, the sweet innocent girls. We get to like a guy, I mean really like him, and we want to make him happy. Just how are we supposed to do it?
The boy wants one thing and we're told that we're not allowed to give it to him. We want to make him happy, and instead we make him miserable and frustrated. Just how do you think that makes us feel?
Didn't anyone tell our fathers that girls have needs and desires, just like boys do? What about our mothers? Didn't they ever really want sex? That's where I get really confused and I start to think that maybe I'm sick or something.
I start to worry that I'm not normal. Maybe I have some part of a boy's blood mixed up in me. Because I do have urges, and I do want sex as often as my boy friend does.
Do you know that once I even asked my mother if she ever wanted sex, and she said no. then I asked her if she enjoyed it when my father made love to her. Do you know what she told me? She actually sat there and said that women weren't supposed to enjoy it. That it was a woman's duty to accept it, but that it was a man's enjoyment.
Have you ever heard such trash in your life? I know it's not nice to talk against your parents. But I think that either they're very stupid, or their heads are somewhere back in the Middle Ages.
The reason why I'm so torn up is that I don't like to think that my parents don't know what they're talking about. Most of all I don't want to go against their wishes. But it's getting harder and harder to avoid having intercourse, when I want to so badly.
I very much enjoy the oral sex, but the more I get to dig this guy, the more I want to do with him. And wanting to have intercourse with him seems like the most natural thing in the world when we're together. It's not the belief that it's bad that makes me keep stopping myself. It's all the brainwashing that I've had.
Oh, I know I'm still young and all, and that this probably won't be my last boy friend. So maybe I will still wait awhile before I get to the real stuff.
But I have to get it all straight in my head now, before I mess up the rest of my life, too. That's why I'm here doctor."
CONCLUSION
^
This girl's character and basic moral understanding were quite good. She had a healthy outlook on life, and a good stable attitude towards her own sexuality. She was very much aware of her urges and didn't want to repress them.
If she had been a bit older, or her parents better educated and more open-minded, there would most likely have been no need for her to seek professional help. With just a few conversations, she emerged from therapy as a happy, well-adjusted teenager.
CASE HISTORY TWO
Subject: Linda Davies Age: Seventeen
INTERVIEW ONE
This is a rather unusual case involving a girl who had been trained to oral sex while she was still in her cradle. It is an excellent example of how we all may form sexual tendencies as early in childhood as infancy if we are exposed to them.
Oralism, especially in infants, is a natural tendency to begin with, and a baby would take easily to sucking on anything that is placed in its mouth. This young lady, with her infants' predisposition to sucking, was a natural, almost willing victim for her incestuous father.
"I've always been proud of my special talent for cock-sucking, doctor. Maybe you'd like to hear some of the great things my boy friends have said about me. Like this guy I knew who had never had a girl's hands on his prick.
I just unzipped his pants, reached in and pulled the stiff out. He thought I was going to jerk him off, but I had something else in mind. I just licked my lips and told him that a pecker like that was good enough to eat. He stared at me with a shocked face, and it was all I could do to keep from laughing. Here this guy was hoping he could get jerked off at best and I was going to give him a super blow job.
With him still staring at me like that, I dropped my head into his lap, and grabbed the shaft of his dick. Then I started to kiss and lick the top of it, stabbing my tongue into the little hole in its head, he could hardly believe what was happening. He kept groaning and muttering, and I kept right on sucking.
Once or twice he almost tried to stop me, as if he wasn't sure I would go ahead and finish him off once I got started. But in seconds the pleasure I was giving him was so great, that he just lay back and let it happen. My mouth travelled all around the top of his prick, and my wet little tongue kept darting in and out, just barely touching the very top.
He gave an excited jump every so often when my teeth would stop once in a while to nip at that tender skin. If I wasn't holding on to his prick and pressing myself on top of his body, he probably would have jumped high enough to hit the ceiling. Pretty soon he was moaning for more.
I waited just long enough to hear him beg me to suck it some more, then I opened my whole mouth wide and moved on down until I could feel the very base of his prick at the back of my throat, he gasped as he felt my teeth close around it at the root. When he was able to get better control of himself, he opened his eyes and watched me as my head moved up and down, my mouth riding his pogo stick like my life depended on it.
He was getting ready to come pretty fast. The guy was freaked out of his head from what I was doing to him down there. He grabbed the back of my head and held me down with his whole prick in my mouth. He even lifted his hips up to force it further down my throat. That was getting to be a little too much, so I had to struggle a little to keep from choking.
I couldn't decide whether to let him come in my mouth or not, but he didn't leave me much of a choice. He grabbed onto my hair and hung on tight. He was working so hard that I didn't have to do very much, since he was pumping his dick so furiously up and down in my mouth. Then he came like a gusher and all that hot cream went pouring down my throat.
Man, let me tell you, that guy was really happy. He said nothing that great had ever happened to him. That's the way it's always been doc. I make men go out of their heads when I start to suck their cocks.
I know how it all got started. My mother told me all about it after she divorced my father. She said she had to kick him out because of the things he had done to me. My very first memories of it are very dim, but the sensations he introduced me to were so great, that I'm not really sure if I should hate him or not.
My mother was pretty straight when the two of them were dating. Oh, they had some sex all right, but just straight fucking. My father had told her that they could have other kinds of sex like sixty-nine, but she didn't seem to go for it, and I guess he decided to wait until they were married and try again.
But still she refused. She told me that she felt a penis was for urination and making babies, and that it wasn't something you're supposed to put your mouth on.
By the time she had told me the story, I had already become a cock-sucking addict. But how was I supposed to tell her a thing like that?
She told me she had always given my father all the regular sex he wanted, but that she wouldn't put it in her mouth. But my father was never satisfied to be getting it just that way. Their marriage was going slowly downhill, but then my mother got pregnant with me. My father didn't have too much to do with her after that. She said she suspected that he was going to whores for it.
According to her, my father was very fond of me, even baby-sat for me when she went out. I guess that's why it happened. After my mother told me all this, I went to see my father and he filled me in on the details, he said I was about nine months old, and he was watching me. I was crying for my bottle and he got a wild idea while he was watching my mouth making sucking motions. I looked so much like my mother even then, that his imagination made me into my mother making sucking motions like she wanted to suck his prick.
It was then that he thought of putting his prick into my mouth. He says he stopped himself a thousand times out of guilt, but I don't believe him. He's such a horrible lecher even now, that I'm willing to bet he never even thought twice about it.
He claims he was so sure a tiny baby like me wouldn't possibly remember anything that happened, but now you see that I do. I guess all the more exciting to him. He says his cock was so hard that he couldn't stop himself.
I couldn't believe my ears when he first started telling it to me, but then I became eager and excited as the story continued. He says he put me in his bed, and held the bottle close in front of my mouth. I started making the sucking motions again, so he slipped it out and dangled it right over my face. That part I sort of remember. It looked like a great new toy. He says I grabbed it with both hands and pulled it down to my mouth. I guess that's natural for a kid, isn't it?
According to him, I could only get the tip of it into my mouth, and the baby's sucking motion drove him wild. You know, Doc? He was even getting excited as he told me the story. I wonder if he's had a chance to do it to any other babies since then.
I just kept sucking at it and he came. At least he had the decency to pull it away from me so it didn't spill all over my face. If he had, I might have grown to hate sucking pricks, but as it is, the case is quite the opposite.
After that, he spent quite a lot of time with me, and I would take his prick and start sucking on it as soon as I saw it. Dad must have gotten his jollies pretty well, until one day my mother caught him with me. Their marriage was over pretty soon after that.
According to my mother, he did have the right to visit me, but she never left him alone with me while I was still a tiny baby. But when I was about two, he was allowed to take me out for the day, and at that age, there are times that I can clearly remember.
He would buy me toys and candy, holding them in one hand while he guided my mouth to his prick with the other hand. Even at that age, I already knew exactly what he wanted, and the line still holds true today. Suck a man's prick for him and he'll give you just about anything.
By that age I could get a little more of it into my mouth. I can still see the dazed look in his eyes, and the flushed, happy color of his face, as I would work him over, baby-style with my mouth.
My mom would always ask me what he did, when he would bring me home. She was suspicious all the time, but I didn't know what it was called, and certainly didn't think it was anything unusual, no different than any other kinds of games that kids play with their fathers. So I never had anything special to say.
That way my mother never found out for sure, and my father was able to get me alone at least once a week, and have me suck him off. This went on, on a regular basis until I was about four years old. I guess he got worried that I would tell my mother everything now that I could talk and I could pretty well understand what was going on.
Life was pretty quiet while I was in grade school. At that age boys were afraid of girls, and I was much more interested in their cocks than in their stupid stunts. But I kept my distance until junior high and then it just got to be too much. By that age, those boys were starting to look pretty good, if you know what I mean.
Their cocks were pretty well-grown and their balls hung pretty full in their jeans. I was a woman, with a woman's body and desires. I would have wanted the sex anyway, by that time. But because of the way my tastes had been slanted when I was so young, every time I saw a prick, I immediately thought of sucking it.
My instincts told me to be careful. I knew I could rack up quite a reputation in no time at all, If I went to sucking all the cocks that appealed to me. It would have to be boys that I trusted, at the very least boys that I knew would not get back to my mother.
She's watched me like a hawk all my life.
Guess she knew there was a good possibility I would turn out perverted, and she was right.
About the only chance I had was to go to some parties with older kids from another school. I was pretty well developed and able to pass for sixteen or seventeen with no trouble at all. My mother was starting to date men on her own, and she trusted me home alone, because she figured I would be afraid of boys or something. I saw no reason to let her in on the truth, the truth being that I couldn't wait to get my lips wrapped around some nice hot cock!
One night, as soon as she left the house, I got all dressed up, put on some make-up and went to this party I had heard about from some older girls. They were blowing pot and drinking beer. Everyone was in a pretty groovy mood by the time I got there.
Someone handed me a reefer and I turned on. There were bodies all over the place, petting, fucking, all kinds of stuff. It was just the atmosphere I was looking for.
There was this one big husky guy who just freaked me out. He was wearing the tightest jeans I had ever seen, and even soft I could tell that he had to have a monster cock. That was my mark for the night. My mouth was just watering for a taste of that big hunk of meat.
He seemed to be too spaced out to notice me, so I went up to him and grabbed his balls. He got my message immediately, and got up to lead me to a more secluded part of the room. There we undressed without even bothering to talk to each other. There didn't seem to be anything to talk about.
We just got down on the floor and started to mess around. Some of the stuff was a little new to me, but I found myself loving every bit of it. He grabbed one of my tits with one hand, and my cunt with the other. That was one thing my father had never done.
I mean even Dad had a code of ethics, no matter how warped it was. He never laid a hand on me while I was growing up, and never tried to do anything except have me suck his cock. He even stopped asking for that when I was very small and never asked again. Actually, now that I think of it, he seemed to lose interest as I started to develop physically. I guess he only felt secure about me as a baby. It doesn't really matter anymore, but I still think about it from time to time.
I mean, now that I could really give him some groovy kicks, he doesn't seem to want it from me anymore. I wouldn't turn my old man down. I do have some memories of having sucked him off, and it wouldn't be anything new. But I know that he doesn't want me, and I don't push it.
So what this guy was doing to me was totally new and I really dug it. It felt good to have his hands all over my body. I put my hand down between his legs, and my fist closed tightly over a he-man sized cock. My heart skipped a beat at the thrilling excitement. I didn't wait for him to ask me. I went ahead and told him I wanted him to ram it down my throat.
So he told me it was okay with him. I was so happy to be getting a chance to taste sperm in my mouth once more that I hopped straight to it. I slid my body down along his, and he moaned as he felt my tits, and then the fluffy hair of my cunt, rubbing along his skin.
I dropped my head down to his cock, and then ran my lips along the whole length of it. I dug the way his body convulsed and trembled as my lips made love to his staff.
I ran my tongue all up one side of the length of it, and then all the way down the other side. He was starting to moan and pant, just the way my father used to, and I felt right at home. I felt good and it tasted even better.
I mean, man, it tasted wonderful. Better than any ice cream sundae, hamburger, anything! I think I'd rather suck cock than anything in the world! Does that me sick?
Well, getting back to my story, the guy was pretty much out of his head by that time, and I decided to stop the petty stuff and get down to brass tacks. I took his whole cock in my mouth and started to pump it up and down. I expected him to come right away because he was so young and I didn't think he ever had a blow job. But he held his cool for a pretty long time.
I've learned since then that kids start experimenting with sex pretty young, and that most of my girl friends weren't even virgins before we got out of junior high. I was maybe the only one, but then they didn't have a secret like I did.
Suddenly I had a wicked thought and told him I had changed my mind, that I didn't want to suck his cock after all. Man, did he ever get mad!
He grabbed only my long hair, and then held my head down as he humped his thing in and out of my mouth. I guess maybe I wanted to be used like that. It made me feel kind of comfortable in a strange sort of way. Still holding my head down, he kept shoving his big thing deeper and deeper into my mouth.
I wanted to help him along. But my mouth was so full that I couldn't tell him, and he was holding me down so hard that I couldn't even though I wanted to. Then he started ramming his cock down my throat as hard and fast as he could. He wanted to hear me gasp and choke, and I had no choice but to oblige.
All the time I kept laughing to myself, wondering how my Dad would feel if he could see me right at that moment. I wondered if he would be shocked, like a proper father should be, of if he would be proud of me for having learned my lessons so well.
This guy was having such a good time with what I was doing to him that he refused to come, though I could tell it was quite a strain on him to hold himself back. Suddenly, he held my head down all the way, shoved it as far down my throat as it would go, then shot.
It was the wildest time I ever had sucking cock. I think I feel that way because it was the first time with anybody other than my father, and especially the first time someone ever touched me.
I saw that guy a few times after that, and we got into some other stuff like "69" and my first straight fucking. But as for me, I always preferred sucking his cock and he knew it.
But this guy and the next few that I fucked for went a long way towards making me feel that maybe I was just a little twisted. Not that they didn't love the wild things I did to them with my mouth. It was just that they thought it a little peculiar that I preferred doing that to them than even having them eat my cunt.
Sometimes I would catch one of them looking at me like I was weird or something and I began to think that maybe I was. But I just couldn't stop myself from sucking a cock as soon as look at it.
I told you that I didn't remember all that much of when I was a baby and my Dad first started making me do that to him-But Doc, I tell you. the more cock I sucked, the more of my memory that came back.
Once when I was high on pot, I was going down on this cock and all of a sudden I thought I was going down on my father. The guy told me later on, that I kept on murmuring "Daddy. Oh, Daddy", all the time I was doing it.
Doc, I tell you. That scared the hell out of me. Just how sick am I? Isn't it even a little normal for a girl to dig sucking cock, even if she's only my age? Can't you tell me anything that will make sense to me?
After that I stopped going with guys for a while. I was trying to get my head straight about my Dad and cock sucking, but I couldn't seem to get it all together. I tried to stay away from it, but the harder I tried, the more I seemed to need it.
One day I just couldn't stand it anymore, and I just walked up to this guy who was hanging around in the local candy store. I was a little older now, and I knew what to say to guys, and how to get them going.
I just told him I was looking for some action and I didn't have any time for playing games. The next thing I asked him was if he had a place to go, and he took me to his house, as both of his parents worked. My cunt was wet and itchy by the time we got there.
About a year before that, I had discovered that I could orgasm just by having a cock in my mouth long enough if I let it happen, and I really got a kick out of it. Now my cunt was getting sopping wet just with the anticipation of it.
But I wanted to torture myself a little. I sat down in a chair and asked him to strip, which he did without questioning me. By this time the guys around town, knew me for my special preferences, and no one said anything about it.
I could tell that he was just humoring me, because his cock didn't even get hard standing naked in front of me. You could just tell that he was going through the motions so the weirdo chick could get her rocks off before I sucked him off.
But I didn't care as long as I got my kicks. I got up from my chair and walked around him. Then I let my hands travel all over his body as if I were examining some merchandise. On the spur of the moment I stopped in front of him and placed the palm of my hand right over his cock.
I asked him if he thought his cock would stay soft if I started to play with him. Just then I laughed, because it was already starting to swell under my hand. I could tell that he was trying to fight me, just for spite, maybe. But his cock seemed to have a mind of its own.
His cock continued to swell and stiffen as I played ever so lightly with it. He hid his face with embarrassment. I guess all guys are alike when it comes to their cocks. They just can't resist having them pampered. I continued to rub and pull at it until it was standing at full battle readiness.
Then I grabbed his balls and started to squeeze one against the other. He moaned and sighed a lot, but made no attempt to stop me His body was tense and rigid, but his pelvis was arched foreword in my direction, as if begging me to continue what I was doing.
I stopped and laughed, then pulled him towards me by use of his stiff prick. Then I sat down in the chair with my face at eye level with his organ. He beckoned to me and I opened my mouth and slid my tongue over the swollen head of his blood-filled penis.
It was the same story all over again. I had visions of my own father standing before me, with his cock erect and ready to be forced between my lips. And I welcomed it! God, how I welcomed it!
Now the guy was completely in my power, and putting up no fight at all. I brought my hands around to his ass cheeks and dug my fingers in as I plunged my head down even further on his stiff organ.
I kept pushing my head on down until I could feel the tip of his cock pounding at the back of my throat. In fact, I kept pushing so hard, that even I was sure I was going to choke on it. I guess I can just never get enough of it, even when I have it in my mouth.
This guy was now so hot that I could tell he was already close to shooting. But I was not to be cheated of my lollipop just yet. Just when he was beginning to breathe a little too hard, I pulled my head all the way back until only the tip of it was still in my mouth. The guy got mad and started to yell at me, but all I did was laugh and laugh.
I put my hand on it and pulled it out to take a look. That look was my downfall, because all of a sudden I had to have it in my mouth again, down my throat again, as deep as it would go!
It was all over for me than. I just couldn't stop myself. Faster and faster I sucked that big cock in and out of my mouth. Now I couldn't wait to taste all that hot scum pouring down my throat.
He was the master just then, and he tried to keep me from getting my reward, but he couldn't hold out for very long. I clutched his ass cheeks even more tightly and forced my mouth down on him as far as I could go.
The come poured into my mouth, but still I didn't stop. My tongue continued to run wildly around his cock, until at last I had to let go because it had gone completely limp.
So there I was again! After all my good resolutions! After all my promises to myself that I would give it up and start having straight sex like normal girls, I found I couldn't be in the same room with a stiff dick and not stuff it right into my mouth.
I admit that there are times when I hate my father for having gotten me started in this thing. But I guess I only feel that way when there's none available, or I've heard someone make a crack about my taste for it. And that's not too often.
It's just that I've learned enough about sex and life by this time to know that there's something wrong with me. Look, I want to settle down and have a family, just like other girls do. But I'm not sure I can find a man who would be willing to put up with my strange ways for very long.
Sure, he would dig having his cock sucked a lot. But I'm sure he'll notice that I like to do it a little too much and start to wonder why. Am I supposed to tell him about how I got started? Won't he get kind of disgusted with me after a while?
A normal man may like getting blow jobs, but he also likes his straight fucking a little more often than I would be willing to give him. If I could find a man I could love and trust, and I think I could get that far, I would want to give him a normal marriage if I possibly could.
That's why I'm here, Doc. I'm not at all sure I would be a good patient for you. It's just that while I do want to change, I wouldn't be doing it because I'm sure there's something wrong with the way I'm living now.
I would only be doing it because I want a man to accept me and be able to love me in a normal way. If I seem like too much of a freak, then maybe only a freak would be attracted to me. Is there anything you can do for me, doctor?
CONCLUSION
^
While the girl kept protesting that she didn't really see anything wrong with what she was doing, she protested very often. Through all her conversations, there was the obvious undercurrent of guilt and anxiety. She was extremely concerned the world might consider her to be abnormal, but had a hard time facing her illness, because she was enjoying it so much.
At the same time it was equally difficult for her to completely blame her father as she possessed a daughter's love for her Daddy, which is totally natural, even in the most perverted associations. However, her native intelligence and her healthy suspicions about the way she was living, led her down the right track to a cure.
CASE HISTORY THREE
^
Subject: Caroline Smith Age: Sixteen
INTERVIEW ONE
This subject came in for analysis only after several years of active sexual practices which included a great deal of fellatio. It is because of our religious codes which attack oral sex that children such as this girl will come in for analysis, suffering from a great deal of guilt.
Any parent who believes all a young teenager does is pet is sadly mistaken. While there is a great deal of manual exploration, most teenage children go a great deal further before they reach full adulthood. Oralism is usually the last of the sexual practices that they encounter, and it is the one about which they usually have the most misgivings.
I've never been a pretty girl, Doctor, as you can tell. I was even a homely baby from what they say. So you can understand that I didn't have much of a chance with any of the really sharp boys in school. In fact I didn't have much of a chance with any boys at all.
So I was just happy when I had a date. It never occurred to me to experiment with sex. I guess I felt that way because I was sure no one would want me even if I offered it. So of course, the idea of going down on a guy didn't even pop into my mind.
I'm sure none of my girl friends would go down on a guy in those days. Even the thought of sucking on a guy's cock would make them go all disgusted. And I guess I felt the same way until I spotted my mother doing it to my father once.
I used to watch them a lot. They still kept their bedroom door open at night in case I got sick or had a bad dream during the night. So I used to get a lot of chances to sneak up on them and watch the fun and games.
Most of the time they would just do it in the regular way. A couple of kisses and then Dad would climb on top of my mother and start humping her. Even when I was fast asleep the sounds of the groaning and moaning would get to me and I would sneak up near their door to watch them go at it. Watching them like that would usually get me so excited that I'd put my hand under my nightgown, so I could finger myself while I watched them.
But this particular night was very different. I'm glad I heard them or I would never have had some of the chances with guys because of what I learned from them. It was really late at night, but I wasn't sleeping very well at all. Watching them and masturbating a lot was leaving me all hung up to get a guy of my own, and I didn't know how to handle it.
So I heard them right away. I was not even dozing off and I heard them talking. My father was trying to talk her into something and she didn't seem too willing. They had a light on and they were in their night clothes. They were so busy feeling each other up that they didn't even notice me so close near them.
My mother's nightgown was open at the top and my father was busy licking and mauling at her breasts. She kept saying that she had her period, but my father kept answering that it didn't matter.
He dropped his pajama bottoms and I could see that his prick was already very hard. I didn't think I've ever seen one so big, probably because it was the first one I ever saw.
Even though my mother was busy making excuses for how she couldn't have sex with him, her hands were very busy rubbing at his prick and stroking it up and down. Dad would close his eyes and start to moan, then he would whisper to her some more.
Finally, he must have said the magic words, because Mom said yes. Then she dropped to her knees in front of him and bent her head towards his prick. I almost fainted at what I was watching. It was all I could do to keep them from hearing me gasp.
Somehow I figured out what it was they were doing, and I immediately began to feel very warm between my thighs. My private was already very wet and getting wetter. As I watched with my mouth open from amazement, she took his organ in both her hands, then started to bring it up close to her mouth.
My father kept moaning all the time as she popped the dark head of his thing into her mouth. Then she closed her lips over it. My father kind of pushed his hips up as if he was trying to push it right down her throat. But she didn't seem to mind it in the least.
She dropped her head down even more and swallowed that whole thing right up, all the way to the hairy part. At that age, I didn't understand how she could do it, but now I know, because I've done it so many times myself.
My mother certainly seemed to enjoy what he was making her do. Her face looked all sorts of flush and happy. Her head kept moving up and down, up and down, like some kind of machine. I was sure my father was going crazy from the groovy kicks she was giving him. She must have really been good at it.
Because, before too long I saw him grab onto the mattress, then throw his head back in kind of a daze. His whole body started to shudder. Even then I could already tell that those were the signs that a man was ready to come.
My mother didn't let him come in her mouth, but she did hold on to it and kept it pressed against her cheek. She kept turning and giving it tiny little kisses and nibbles while it kept shooting cream all over the place. It was all over her face and his belly.
Ultimately, when it finally stopped, they both fell back and started to laugh like they just had the greatest fun. My dad kept kissing her and telling her how terrific she was.
But they weren't alone in their happiness. I felt pretty good about the whole thing too. I had gotten off two orgasms while it was all going on, and I hadn't worked nearly as hard as those two did. All I did was watch the fun and rub my clit.
Just then I got myself together and realized what had turned me on so much. While my mother was sucking my father's, organ, I had stuffed my thumb in my mouth and was mimicking the same thing. When I realized what I had been doing, I just couldn't believe it. But there was no getting away from it. That was the reason for my multiple orgasms.
I was all the time fantasizing that I had a guy's prick in my mouth, and that was what did it for me. But even at that minute I knew that it could only work for me that first time. It could never be the same again, not after what I had seen. I still wondered what it smelled like, and tasted like. How the hair would feel against my nose and face.
From that minute on, it was almost all I could think about. I was determined to find out on my own. None of us girls had even talked about it, much less tried it, and I wondered if my friends even knew what it was all about.
There was one girl in our crowd who was very pretty and very popular with the boys. I figured if anyone knew, she did. She never minded talking to me about things like that, because I guess she figured I wasn't any kind of competition for her.
After all, she was real pretty, and I knew any guy would give a lot just to be out with her, much less screw her. So if she wanted it, she must have had her pick. Me being ugly like I was, must have given her quite a kick to tell me about all her little adventures.
She had told me about a couple of times when she put out for guys in the back seats of their cars. She was kind of proud about spreading her legs for them, even bragged about it.
But when I asked her if she went down on them, she got angry and yelled at me like I had insulted her. In her mind, it seemed that it was okay to fuck for a guy, but it wasn't okay to suck his dick. I just couldn't understand her.
I mean, what's the difference, really? It's just a different way of putting out for him, isn't it? In my mind, if it was okay to do one, then it was okay to do the other.
She didn't stop me from my master plan. I didn't have to listen to everything she said just because she was pretty. I thought about asking some of the guys if they were interested, but I just didn't know how to go about it. I was afraid they would think I was too ugly and maybe laugh at me, even if they would have been getting a kick for their trouble.
So, I had to come up with a way that I wouldn't be afraid of. Then I hit upon the perfect way. There was this 10 year old boy that I used to sit for a lot. I didn't like him very much and he always gave me a lot of trouble, but he was a boy after all. And that meant that he had a prick, even if it was a little one.
His best feature was that he was a pretty heavy sleeper, and wouldn't know what was going on, if I should try something on him once he was out. A plan was beginning to form in my mind, and I knew I might just be able to get away with it.
I started getting excited immediately, just at the thought that I would finally be getting a taste of a prick. The fact that I wouldn't have to try to charm a guy, and risk being turned down in the bargain, made it even more attractive to me.
The boys' parents didn't even bother to tell me the part about not inviting any boys over. They knew I didn't have any that would be willing to come. But I didn't care what they thought. They didn't know it, but they were already providing me with all I needed for my little experiment.
The kid was especially bad that night, but I didn't yell at him very much. I wanted him to be in a good mood, especially when he fell asleep. My plan even went so far as to let him stay up a little later so he would be good and tired when he finally did go to sleep. If he got up while I was trying him out, it would be all over for me.
It seemed like forever before I could be sure that he was so sound asleep nothing I might do would wake him up. He didn't budge. He was even sleeping in the perfect position for me, flat on his back with his legs spread wide.
I even called to him, but he still didn't move. It was like he was unconscious. This was my big chance, and I couldn't hold back another minute. Before I knew what was happening, I had unzipped his bottoms and pulled them down to his ankles.
It wasn't exactly what I had expected. But there was no doubt that it was a prick after all. It didn't look big and hairy like my father's. Instead, it was kind of long and slender, more on the white side than my father's, and the head of it was tiny and pink.
But beggars couldn't be choosers, and since it was the only prick available to me, it would have to do. Besides, I was running out of time. I couldn't very well be caught like that in the kid's room and his little thing in my mouth.
The risk of not getting another chance gave me the nerve I needed to go ahead and do it. So I hurried up and knelt beside the bed, picked up his tiny prick with my fingers and placed it in my mouth.
At first, I wasn't quite sure how I felt. It tasted sort of funny, but not really bad. But it didn't taste like my own skin might have. Curious as hell, I kept running my tongue around his little thing still in my mouth. Before I knew what was happening, that little kid got up an erection of his very own.
I was pretty damned happy about the way things were going. I wasn't too sure that a little kid like that could get an orgasm, but I was pretty happy that he could get an erection. And, there it was, sticking straight up in the air like a lance.
Even a little boy's prick, did grow quite a bit and got a lot thicker than when it was limp. Still, and all it wasn't a man-sized one, but I made the most of what I had on hand.
It was starting to get to be whole lot of fun for me. I started trying out little changes and variations. Sometimes I would just stick out my tongue and flick it across his little tip. Then I tried licking his little balls. I even tried sticking my tongue all the way out and running it up first one side of his prick and then down the other side.
I couldn't believe how stiff his little thing was standing up. It was kind of twitching and throbbing, and I got real excited watching what I was doing to him.
He was even kind of moaning, but he showed no signs of waking up, so I was still in the clear. Now I was really excited, and my cunt was starting to ache... So I kept on sucking his little thing, holding it with one hand, while I managed to get my other hand into my pants. This way I was able to frig myself and suck his prick at the same time.
I don't remember when I first started playing with the little boy, but I must have been going at it for a very long time, .because all of a sudden, I heard the key in the front door. And just when I was about to orgasm, too!
But I forced myself to come back to my senses, and cover up the kid, before his folks got into the house and figured out what was happening. I barely made it before his father appeared in the bedroom doorway.
All he caught me at was covering up the boy and patting him on the head. I guess that made a pretty innocent picture. There was nothing I could do about the guilt I was feeling at almost being caught, but I guess my face didn't show it, because the father's face didn't show anything unusual.
So I picked up my confidence all over again and got my things ready for the boy's father to take me home. I think that's the first time I really took notice of him, and I'm sure it's the first time he even looked at me. I guess he picked up on the sexy gleam in my eye or something. But whatever it was, all of a sudden he looked very interested in me.
I couldn't believe my luck all in one night. It was even better than my girlfriends getting a quick feel or a fuck in the back of a car. Here I was with a grown man actually interested in me. He kept eyeing me up and down and I did the same to him. There wasn't a chance to say anything but we both understood what was in our minds.
Once we got into the car he asked me if I was in a hurry to get home and I said that I wasn't. He found a deserted spot at the end of a back road for us, then parked the car and turned off the lights.
I was shivering with excitement. It was possible that he might want to fuck me, but I knew that if I offered him my mouth instead, he would be more than satisfied with it. After all, I was still a virgin, and hoping to keep it for a special boy, if I was very lucky enough to find one.
He just up and asked me if I was interested in a little sex and I explained that I was a virgin. When he told me that it didn't matter, I was more than just a little surprised. As it turned out he had seen what I was doing to his son as he walked up to the house and for a minute I was afraid he might blackmail me or something.
Then he explained that if I was so interested in cock-sucking he would be more than happy to give me a few pointers. I got a little scared just then, being so close to getting the real thing and all. For a minute I didn't know whether to say yes or no. I wasn't quite sure if he was testing me to see how bad a girl I was or not.
And I also knew that if I got started with him he could get me in real trouble with my folks and everything. But I just couldn't stifle that warm, wet, excited feeling in my panties. I wanted to taste his cock so badly that it was worth all the trouble I might get into later on. My conscience told me that I should open the car door and run like hell, but I seemed to be frozen to the seat.
I know I mumbled something like that I really should be getting home, but he didn't pay any attention to what I was saying. His eyes just keep right on glittering and his face got kind of flushed. Then he told me that we weren't going anywhere until I tried sucking on his pogo stick as he called it.
I just sat there and stared at him as he unzipped his fly and took his cock out. My heart dropped to my belly but still I couldn't move. I tried not to take a peek at it, but I couldn't help myself. That big white prick of his was hanging out of his pants, and right before my eyes, it started to get hard.
I guess I looked sort of stupid, sitting there and gaping like that, but there didn't seem to be anything else to do. Then he told me that there was nothing to be afraid of and why didn't I do a little exploring. He even opened his pants more and laid back on the back of the seat so I could have more freedom with his equipment, but I was still too frightened to move. I asked him to please take me home right away. That was when he told me that if I didn't give him what he wanted, he would report what I did to the police.
Now I know that man thought the only way he could get me to suck his dick was to threaten me. But secretly I was glad that he was talking me into it, I mean, I really wanted to do it to him and all, but I didn't want to seem as anxious as I really was.
So it was okay for me to go ahead now. I could always say that he had forced me into it. I started to bend over his belly and I had done with his son, and as soon as I got close enough, he grabbed onto my head and pushed me all the way down.
Without even thinking about it, my mouth opened and his cock slipped right in. It was a hell of a lot bigger than the little boy's thing. It even tasted different in an odd sort of way.
More like I imagined it should be.
The boy's had tasted something like baby powder and bubble bath, but this one kind of tasted like deodorant and sweat. It was really manly ... do you know what I mean? The man didn't know it, but what he was making me do, was really the answer to all my prayers.
I was expecting him to help me out a little, but as long as I was sucking him off, he didn't touch me. I guess I was giving him the only thing he was interested in. When it came down to it, I was still an ugly girl, but at least an ugly girl with a willing mouth.
So there was nothing I could do but dig my hand into my pants and start to frig myself. I was a little embarrassed for him to see me doing it, but I just couldn't help myself.
He was getting ready to come pretty fast. I remembered the way I had seen my mother do it and took my mouth off it just as he was starting to come. Well, that thing sputtered and started spraying all over the car. He didn't notice it until he stopped shooting, and then, did he ever get mad at me.
Cursing all over the place, he said that anyone could tell what had just happened by looking at his pants or the car seat. He made a fist and I thought that he was going to hit me.
I was really frightened and started to cry. I said things like he had forced me into something I didn't want to do and that I was afraid to swallow it. None of that was true. But it was the first thing that came into my mind.
I guess, he couldn't take the crying very well. He stopped yelling at me and apologized for getting me so upset. He thought about it for a minute then said he could stop in the garage and wash everything down with the hose before he went into the house. Then he could always say that he spilled something. I could tell that he was still really thinking, but I didn't know what.
That was when he gave me a ten dollar bill and told me that it was only our secret and I wasn't to dare tell anyone what had happened, and it made me start jumping ahead.
That ten dollar bill went towards a sweater that I really wanted, and there were other things that I always like to buy. If this guy gave me money for it, then maybe some of the boys at school might want to chip in for a little extra action that they couldn't get from the other girls.
I know it sounds like I was thinking about turning into a whore, but it wasn't really quite like that. It's just that I was sure there were a lot of guys that would be willing to fork over a few bucks for some mouth action, and as it turned out I was right.
In the beginning, I would do it for anyone with a few bucks, but after awhile, I found out that some of the really groovy guys didn't have too much money, but they did have other things that I wanted. Like tickets to dances and shows, or taking me to certain parties when I couldn't get an invitation any other way.
After a few months, I developed a style of my own that all the guys really dug. They started to pass the word around, and before I knew it, I had all the dates and all the cocks I could manage.
I'm sure my girl friends must have gotten wind of how I was suddenly getting so popular, but they never said anything to me about it. At least not to my face, it was that very pretty girl that I told you about who gave me some trouble.
She went around school telling everyone that the only way I could get dates was by sucking cocks for every boy who had the price. One day I took her in the back of the locker room and punched her face in a little.
Then I started to cry because I knew she was right. I had even heard the boys snickering behind, my back from time to time, but I tried very hard to pretend I hadn't heard it.
Once the thing got started, there seemed to be no way to stop it. I really wished the boys would want to be with me for other reasons, like my looks or personality, but I know I don't have either one of those things.
I really believe that if I hadn't come up with this way of getting close to the guys that they still wouldn't bother with me. Still, I know that all of them don't have any use for me except for what I can do with my mouth, and sometimes it really hurts me when I think about it.
When you come down to it, I do wish I was like other girls, but I've really developed a liking for the cock-sucking thing and I'm not sure if I want to get out of it. If there was only some way that I could get the guys to like me for myself, and then suck their cocks for them, once I was sure that they dug me. Personalities and building up their self-respect in other areas.
This girl would have been completely normal in all other aspects, were it not for her total lack of self-confidence. Her problem was that she chose oralism as an avenue towards popularity.
CONCLUSION
^
So many teenage girls firmly believe that the only way they can be popular with the boys is to give them the sex they want. They put so much time and effort into it, that they don't have any left to spend on fortifying their
CASE HISTORY FOUR
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Subject: Tiffany Age: Twenty
INTERVIEW ONE
There are so many instances of young girls being introduced to sex by their near relatives that it is close to epidemic in proportions. The statistics would probably show the incidence of it to be much higher, if all girls had the courage to come forward and report it.
Unfortunately, the truth does come out in other ways as the girls get older and attempt to have sexual lives of their own. Then, their confused ideas about their pasts and the attitudes they have formed about sex in the present get all mixed up.
My first sex experience with a man, my uncle, was when I was nine years old. My father had died when I was still an infant, and my mother had her brother living with us to help out. They worked different shifts at this store they owned, so there was always one of them at home to take care of me.
He was kind of a good-looking guy and lots of fun to play with me. He didn't treat me carefully, like a little doll, the way my mother did. He played really rough and tumble, and I loved every minute of it.
When he would read me a bedtime story, I would sit on his lap and he would cuddle me real close and rub my neck. It's no wonder that I just adored that man. Even when he went out, he would usually take me with him, and every little trip was a real adventure to me.
I knew he was aware of the way my body was starting to change a little. He told me all the time how I was getting to be a young lady, and how proud he was of my looks. Because my father was dead, I took it to mean that he was playing that role, but it wasn't the way things turned out.
His real feelings about me came out one day when I came home from school all bumped and bruised. The worst one was on the inside of my legs, and I didn't want my mother to know about it because I was afraid she would punish me.
Just like I always had with other bad things, I confided this to my uncle as well. He put a very concerned look on his face and told me not to worry, that he would take care of everything. I started to feel better immediately.
He suggested that I go with him to my room so he could make a closer inspection of it. Once we got there he locked the door, and that kind of surprised me, but I didn't worry. After all, I was in there with my darling uncle.
I was instructed to take off my panties, then pull up my dress and lay down on the bed. All this I did without question. He had helped me with my baths a few times, so I wasn't the least bit embarrassed to show him my body at this time.
The big smile on his face, I took to mean that he cared about how I was feeling. But his expression did look a little different this time. Tiny beads of perspiration had broken out on his forehead as he bent over my body. Then he felt the bruise very carefully with his fingers.
But he told me that he wasn't satisfied with such a quick examination. He said that something this serious required a close and careful examination. Then he asked me to pull my dress up even higher. That's when I started to get a little embarrassed.
He just laughed and said that people shouldn't be ashamed of their bodies. Then he suggested that I might be more comfortable if he took off some of his clothes too, that it was about time I learned not to be afraid of a man's body.
What he was saying only made me feel more embarrassed, not less, but I didn't say anything because I trusted him too much to doubt his word.
Even if I wanted to say something, there wouldn't have been much time, because he stepped out of his pants and shorts in quite a hurry. I'd never seen a man like that before, and now my uncle looked very strange to me.
I really had no clear idea of what the difference was between men and women. Now I was surprised to see my uncle standing there with his pants and shorts on the floor. His limp cock was hanging there between his legs like a big, white, crumpled bird. I just stared and stared at it. I was totally fascinated.
It was hard to keep my eyes from following it as he knelt beside my bed and pulled down the sheet I had used to cover myself without thinking about it. His eyes travelled all up and down my young little body. Then he started moving in closer and closer.
His breath was hot as it fell on my naked body. In the meantime, he was busy moving his hands all over my body. Then his fingers very, very closely examined the area of my private parts. His fingers found my little slit, and he started to rub me down there, first all over, then a little on the inside.
I was starting to feel all warm and kind of funny. My mind kept telling me that I wasn't supposed to feel so funny when I was hurt and everything, but it didn't help. It just kept feeling so good.
It felt just like the times when I would play with myself under the covers at night. Only this time, with someone else doing it to me, it felt so much better. I did my best not to give into the great feeling I was getting down there from the hand massage, but what kind of control can you expect from a nine year old?
I kept asking my uncle when he was going to put some medicine on it, but he just laughed and laughed. Now that really puzzled me. Even at that age, I knew that you have to put something on a bruise, then a band-aid so it would heal better.
But my uncle said that he had a special magic trick that would make everything all right. I couldn't imagine what it was. Then he told me that love and kisses always did the trick. I just thought he was being sweet. I didn't think it had anything to do with healing bruises.
It puzzled me and I told him so. He just smiled and said he would show me how it worked. First he spit on his fingers. Then he rubbed my crotch all over. He spit on his fingers some more and then he rubbed it into the inside of my slit.
I was pretty sure it wouldn't do anything to heal a bruise, but it certainly did feel very good. He kept on doing that stuff for a while, rubbing my vagina all over, especially inside the slit. I wanted him to go right on with what he was doing. But he said he really couldn't get enough of the magic worked in where it really should go.
Without saying anything else, he bent right over me, stuck out his tongue and started licking me where he had been rubbing before. His tongue went all over the place ... up and down, in and out of my slit . . . then up and down again. I started to jump and wriggle, and he held me down with his arms. He really didn't have to do that. I wasn't going anyplace. It was just that the tongue-washing was sending shivers up and down my spine and I couldn't stay still.
Finally, he stabbed his tongue all the way in and clamped his open mouth right over my whole sex. I jumped so high I almost hit the ceiling. Then he stopped and just looked at me. I know now he was kind of hoping for me to have an orgasm. But in those days I didn't even know what an orgasm was.
What he did to me felt so good, that I can't even describe it to you. I told him it was the best magic in the world and would I please have some more because the bruise was starting to hurt again. He wouldn't for a little while, then he said he would one more time, but I would have to promise to use the magic on him if he should ever get hurt. I promised, of course.
Then he started in on me again and went at it for maybe a half hour or so. Anyway, it seemed like a very long time to me. Finally, I had to make him stop because my body was aching from being tensed up like that for so long.
He stopped after a while, but he made me promise once more that I would give him the same kind of treatment if he got hurt. I really didn't see how a grown man like that could bruise himself, but I promised because I thought I could get him to give me some more of his special brand of first-aid when I got bruised. And I got bruised a lot in those days.
A few days later I came home from school with a sob story about having fallen off a swing in the playground, and he fell for it, even though I didn't have any bruise to show him. He started out the same way, reminding me that if he should ever hurt himself I would have to take care of him. Then he would rub my privates all over, work some spit into his hands, then start to finger me very carefully.
He always made sure to take down his pants whenever he did it to me. More than once I noticed that his cock got big and very stiff whenever he did it to me. It would throb and jump whenever he ran his lips and tongue over my body.
After a few times, I worked up some courage and asked him what that thing was and why it grew and jumped like that. He told me that he had hurt it some time back, but that he had been so busy taking care of my bumps and bruises that he didn't have time to tell me about it.
Then he said that it was really hurting him very badly now because it had been so neglected. He explained that I could make everything all better in a real big hurry if I would just give it some love and kisses like he had done for me.
I just couldn't make myself do it. That big, long thing kind of scared me. Especially the part at the bottom with all the hair. He acted kind of hurt then, and said that when I was in trouble he didn't stand around and think about it. He went right to it and took all the pain away. Then he went on to say that maybe I didn't love him very much after all, and he might just stop taking care of me.
He made me feel very guilty, and really sorry that his thing was so swollen and hurting so much. Finally, I agreed to do as he asked. He got up and sat on my bed, and I clambered to the floor and knelt in front of him.
My careful uncle went into some detail about exactly where it hurt, and how I should go about curing it. He explained what I should do so many times that I knew it by heart before I even started.
Still, I hesitated. But he moaned and groaned, complaining of how much pain he was in. He made me look and see that his cock was getting even redder and more swollen by the minute.
So I closed my eyes and started in to suck on it for him. It tasted kind of peculiar. But I'm not really sure that it tasted all that bad to me. Just strange. Not like anything I had tasted before.
He kept telling me to kiss it and lick it, just like he had done to my privates. Only he was shaped a little different, so I would have to open my mouth very wide and push it all the way in, in order to really get at the part that hurt so much.
The best I could do at that moment was to get the tip of it into my mouth, and it was more than enough to make him go kind of crazy. He grabbed onto the back of my head and held it tightly while he pushed his cock right into the back of my throat until I gagged.
In a few seconds, I felt it jumping around in my mouth. Then he groaned and I felt hot, kind of salty stuff start pouring down my throat. It seemed to go on like that forever.
At last he let go of my head, and I started to retch and cry. My uncle got sort of frantic, trying to calm me down in any way he knew how. I must have been pretty hysterical, judging from the frantic look on his face. He tried to cuddle me, but I wasn't having any of it.
I pushed him away, then ran into the bathroom and locked the door behind me. Then I stuck my finger down my throat so I could vomit. After that I brushed my teeth and used a mouthwash twice. I could hear my uncle right outside the door all the time. He was begging me to forgive him, and pleading with me to let him make it up to me.
Then the tone of his voice changed and he warned me not to tell a soul what had happened. I was so hurt and angry for what he had done to me that I screamed through the door that I was going to tell my mother as soon as she got home.
I really didn't mean it. I just wanted to make him sorry for what he did. He begged and pleaded with me. His voice cracked while he was talking. He knew he would be in deep trouble if I told her. He knew it even better than I did.
All the time he kept pleading with me, I kept right on saying that I would tell. Finally I could hear that he had gone away from the door and I ran into my bedroom and pushed a chair against the lock. I kept it there until I heard my mother come home.
But I didn't call her into the room. I was so tired that I went right to sleep, and by morning I was feeling pretty good about everything. I went into his room to tell him that everything was all right, but he wasn't there. My mother told me that he had gotten a new job and had to leave town. He never called or wrote to me.
I felt bad for a long time after that. I really hadn't wanted him to leave, and I had promised myself during the night that I would suck his cock for him again if he asked me to. I knew that was the only way he would go on licking my cunt for me.
But he never came back and I missed the things he used to do to me. Every time I would scrape a knee or stub my toe, I would remember how my uncle had healed it and I would start to frig myself. It was all I had left until I got older.
I never saw my uncle again, but as my body matured and I got a little older, I realized that cocksucking and such wasn't just a trick that an uncle played on you. I had found some pocketbooks with pictures and dirty stories in them, and the words always told what a great kick people got when they were given sex orally.
Every word I read and every picture I saw made oral sex seem all so exciting. The memory of how good it used to feel when he would eat my cunt would turn me on every time and I found myself masturbating very often.
Then, when I was in high school I had a lot of dates with boys and we petted a lot. Most of them were satisfied with taking out my tits and playing with them. In the beginning I wouldn't let any of them put their hand up between my legs, but not because I didn't want them to. I just didn't want to show that I knew a little more about sex than the other girls did.
But after a couple of months in school, I did meet a couple of guys who used to dig sucking on my nipples. This one guy would talk to me all the time he was feeling me up.
He would tell me after sucking on my nipples for a while, how he wished that I would suck his prick. But he never pushed for it, so he never got it.
I really wanted a couple of them to eat me, and there was this one guy who had a prick so big that I was dying to go down on him. Every time I would see him, my mouth would water, and my cunt would get damp. I discovered that I missed the taste of hot cock.
A few times it was all I could do to make it home in time so I could masturbate. Then, I had another date with him and while he felt me up a lot, I managed to drop my hand in his lap and touched his hard-on. I came instantly in my panties. That was when I decided that I would date him for a while, so we would be able to get around to the subject of oral sex.
I had fucked only for this one guy, and didn't get much of a kick out of it, so I gave it up. But now that I had my eye on the guy with the big dick, I decided to go the whole route again. First, I let him finger-fuck me, and then I suggested that he suck on my nipples. Man, did he ever go for that.
I knew I couldn't get into the oral routine right off, so I next suggested that we hop in the back seat and fuck. He was more than happy to oblige me. We did that for a couple of dates and I loved the feel of that big prick ramming into me.
After that I decided enough time had gone by for me to get into what I wanted the most... to suck his prick! So I just asked him straight out and he got angry. I mean he actually got angry with me.
He said that he was getting kind of serious about me, and he never thought I might be perverted or anything. Then he said if it was oral sex I wanted, I could become a lesbian, since that was all two girls could do, or I could become a hooker and make a lot of money sucking cocks. He laughed then and said if sucking cocks was what I dug more than anything I could make it my specialty.
Well, I got so mad then that I jumped out of the car and walked all the way home. I never saw him again on dates, and whoever I saw him in school, he always avoided me like the plague.
Now, I knew that men were supposed to dig having their cocks sucked, so I just decided that boys my own age weren't too hip to what was really groovy in the sack, and I decided to push on to bigger and better cocks.
One Friday night, I dressed up as old-looking as I could manage and went to this singles bar that was near where I lived. I wasn't even seventeen yet, but I had on a lot of make-up and I did have a big pair of tits, even then. I think the doorman looked at my chest a lot harder than he looked at my face, and he let me walk right in.
I tried to keep cool and collected as I walked to the door. Still, I couldn't help noticing that every male head in the place turned in my direction as I walked out. I was too nervous to turn around, but I had the feeling that someone was following me out.
As soon as I made it to the street, I stopped just long enough for this tall, dark-haired guy to catch up with me. He offered me the beer I was refused in the bar, but said we would have to go to his place in order to have it. I thanked him for the offer and he called a cab.
Instead of beer, he gave me some groovy wine, and I got very high, very fast. All of a sudden he had his hands all over me, and he took mine and put them in his lap. I obliged him by rubbing them all over his crotch, and like magic I felt his cock get hard.
Then he asked me if I cared to suck on it and I said yes. He unzipped his fly and took it out for me. I was very excited. In my pink little daze, I thought it was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.
I kissed it all over, sucked on the tip of it and slurped my way along the sides. Some moisture started to trickle out of the top. I darted my tongue out to lick it up. I couldn't tell which one of us was more excited then, but I couldn't stop myself from eating that guy up alive.
So I jumped on that thing and shoved it so hard in my mouth that he asked me if I wanted to swallow the whole thing up. I worked and worked with my tongue and my mouth until he shot. Then I gulped and swallowed every last drop of it.
Sure enough, the guy pushed a couple of twenties into my purse while I was in the bathroom cleaning up, and a slip of paper with his name and address on it. He told me to call him for a date any time I was in the mood to swallow some more meat, and I promised that I would.
What I did that night, didn't really bother me until several days later, when I heard some of the boys in school talking about a hooker they had hired for their club and how she had sucked off every one of them for $ 25.00.
They were talking about her in such a way that made it obvious they though she was the lowest piece of trash that ever walked the earth. That's when I began to feel that I must be like something close to her to dig cock-sucking the way I do.
At the time I heard it, I couldn't see much difference between myself and the lowest hooker. Sometime after that, I did some reading and I learned that hookers usually don't dig men at all. But that isn't the way it is with me.
I'm not like them, doctor. Please tell me that I'm not like a common street-walker. How can I help it if my uncle gave me a taste for cock when I was so young? I .didn't ask for it, did I?
Was it so wrong of me to go looking for what I wanted? Men do it all the time, don't they? If you tell me I'm not supposed to act the way I do, and I'm not supposed to like sucking cocks, then I'll stop. But I still won't understand why, to search for what her needs drove her to. Society's men in her area were not accustomed to a young woman brave enough to go out and seek sex the way they did freely. So they branded her a pervert and a hooker.
CONCLUSION
^
This girl only turned to psychiatry in desperation. She was confused by the needs of her own body, and by the double standard that society holds up for its men and women. She had been turned to a particular phase of sex by a lascivious uncle, then deserted by him with no clear understanding of what had happened or what was wrong with it.
As a natural course of events, she was forced.
CASE HISTORY FIVE
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Subject: Janice Age: nineteen
INTERVIEW ONE
When the subject came to me, she was so edgy being in the same room with a man, that it was quite difficult to communicate with her. Her mistrust and dislike for male contact were all too obvious, both in her body language and her facial expressions.
She was, however, eager to verbalize and get her feelings out in the open. She spoke freely and without shame. For this reason, it was fairly easy to eventually work out an understanding of true sexuality.
"I want you to know right off the bat, that there's nothing you can say that will make me think sex is a good thing, all full of love and deep meaning. You just hand me that line and I'll walk right out of here.
Everything I've ever heard about sex is dirty and everything I've seen is even worse. That's what I've seen. That's what I've been taught and that's what I believe. It's sick and perverted and only freaky people can get to dig it.
Until I was eleven, I only heard that it was evil, and even when my parents went to bed at night, I could always hear my mother complaining that she didn't want my father to do it to her. She would say things like she had a headache, or she was tired. But my father knew the truth and so did I. She just didn't want to have him do those dirty things to her.
I used to be sorry that I was born, because it meant that my mother had to give herself to him in a way that she hated, just so I could be born. When I think about that I really wish the fairy tale about the stork bringing us could be true.
My mother was all the time telling me that it's something you have to put up with when you're married, and from some of the other things that she's told me, I'm not sure I'll ever get married. What for?
Look, I won't give you a chance to tell me I shouldn't judge it until I've tried it myself. Because believe me, I have and I know very well what I'm talking about. True, the first time I didn't have much choice, but I've tried it on my own since then and I still hate it.
I don't like the way you look at me when I say that I hate it. I'll bet you don't think I have any good reason. Or maybe you think I'm one of those broads who's really frigid and blames it on the men.
Well, it's nothing like that. To tell you the truth, I think I might have gotten to like it if I hadn't started off the way I did. And I mean it when I say that I really tried hard to make it with guys when I got a little older. But all it's done is left me hanging with a lot of problems, and a lot of confused feelings.
I wasn't much more than twelve years old when it all first happened. I'm not really even sure why they singled me out. There were quite a few girls that I hung out in the neighborhood with. I think they picked me because I was the best developed for my age.
At that age, the boys didn't much bother with us, so I thought it was a little strange when they invited me to this cellar they called their hang-out. They were all a few years older than I was. A couple of them were seventeen.
Maybe I should have been careful, but I kind of took it as an honor that they picked me over everyone else. Still, I had no idea what they wanted with me. That sounds a little strange, even to me, now that I think about it.
I must have heard a thousand times from my parents that all men were out to get sex from any female they could get their hands on. It was my own father who told me to stay away from boys the day I got my first period. He said that the devil was in them even when they were my age, and that none of them could be trusted alone with any girl.
It all sounded like such a big joke when he told me those things. Now of course, I know how close to the truth he came. Don't say that to me doctor. Don't tell me that my case is an exception rather than the rule. I've heard enough stories since then to know there are very few girls who have happy sex lives.
Well, maybe you're right. Maybe they say one thing when they really mean the other. I suppose a couple of them might be having some kicks from it, but they don't want to say so. Some girls are like that. They just want to stay in with the crowd, whichever way it goes.
So I went along anyway, just like the lamb to the slaughter. They were using the cellar of a store that one of the boys' fathers owned. It was about as dingy as you could imagine. The walls were painted black, and they had weirdo posters and dirty words all over the walls.
There were old lamps in the comers with red bulbs in them. I got scared the minute I walked in the door, but I decided that I would bluff my way through it. I managed it, but barely. Besides everything else, it was dirty, and I thought I could see bugs and things crawling in the shadows.
That's when I got a little smart alecky with them. I told them it was an awful place, and I didn't see why they spent so much of their time there. All they did was look at me, then look at each other and laugh.
I looked from face to face. I was starting to get really nervous. It was so dark in there that I wasn't even sure anymore where the door was. There were guys standing all around me in sort of a circle, and I don't think they would have let me leave, even if I could figure out where the door was.
My eyes went from face to face, but I couldn't tell what they wanted from me. Finally, one boy spoke up. He said they spent so much time there because they knew an awful lot of interesting games, and this was the best place to play them.
They all had a good laugh at that remark. My stomach was starting to do flip-flops, but I was trying hard to act brave and calm. So I asked him to stop laughing and just tell me what kind of games he was talking about.
He snickered then, and told me that they called it "Big Guns." That meant they all pulled their pricks out, and then got them hard to see who had the biggest one. My mouth hung open and I was still staring at his face, trying to make his words sink into my understanding.
But I wasn't over the shock of what he said before he dropped his pants and pulled his cock out of his shorts right in front of me. I almost fell over and fainted from fright. I had never seen one before. I mean not even a small one since I don't have brothers.
I tried not to show how I was feeling, but I couldn't keep my feet from trying to get away from that horrible thing. The guys were laughing their heads off by that time.
My girlfriends used to go with some of the younger boys when they were small. They would hide in the garage and play doctor. But I didn't want to be that near a boy even then. I always felt different, more separate from the other kids.
Now I started looking for the doorway frantically. My instincts were telling me what they were up to and I was frantic to get away. Finally, I could make out what I thought was the door and I started to run towards it.
Nobody tried to stop me. They just kept right on laughing.
I flung open the door and fell to the floor hysterical when I saw what it led to. There was another dingy room with a couple of filthy mattresses in it. I just got so hysterical that I didn't try to run anymore. They all crowded into the room behind me and started laughing real hard. I just kept crying and crying.
Then one of them said that they should give me some toys to play with so I wouldn't be so sad. They all pulled down their pants. There were pricks of all sizes and conditions. Some of them were hard. Some of the guys were stroking them to get them hard. Nobody seemed the least bit nervous except me.
A couple of the boys kept yelling that I should show them what I had in exchange for the show they were giving me. I pleaded with them to let me go home, but nobody would listen. Then I started to scream as a couple of them started moving closer. Somebody slapped me hard across the face. I don't know which one of them it was. He warned me to keep my mouth shut, or it would be much worse for me.
The tone of his voice told me that I better do as he said. Then he grabbed me and threw me down on one of the mattresses. They were all yelling things, to me and to each other. All of a sudden one of the boys jumped on my chest and pinned me down there.
Suddenly, there were all kinds of hands groping around under my skirt, tugging my panties and then pulling them down towards my ankles. If that wasn't bad enough, I was in for even more trouble.
The guy that was sitting on my chest with all of his weight was keeping me pinned at the shoulders to the mattress with his knees. His pants and his shorts were all the way down, and his prick was dangling so close to my nose and my mouth that the tip of it kept brushing against my face.
I tried my best to turn my head away, but every way I moved, his prick just kept bouncing right back in front of me. My mouth was dry from fear, and I tried to wet my lips with my tongue. When I did that, it touched his prick and he groaned a little. Instantly, I could see that his thing was getting longer, even thicker and starting to stand straight up.
One of them said that with my long tongue, I would probably make a good pet if they just trained me right. Then the one on top of me said that he knew exactly how to get my training off to a good start. One of them suggested that they have me jerk all of them off.
But this guy, probably the leader, said that he had much better things for me to do. That's when he got up on his knees and bent forward so that his cock was pressed up against my lips. It wasn't too hard for any of us to figure out what he had in mind by that time.
Now that they all knew what he had in his mind, they were all jumping up and down all over the place, trying to get in on the action. But I didn't want any part of it.
I fought as hard as I could with my feet and my fists, and I called them every name in the book. I warned them my mother would tell the police what they had all done to me.
But they were in no mood to much care what would happen to them later. All they cared about was what they were going to do to me. Nothing I threatened or cried about seemed to do any good.
Two of the boys pried my mouth open, and the one on top of me, his cock really hard, pushed it down my throat. At first I thought I was going to choke right away, but then I just gagged at the horrible smell and taste of that terrible thing. The boy on top of me didn't seem to mind at all.
He was shoving that thing in and out of my mouth like his life depended on it. His hips were going a mile a minute, up and down, up and down, crashing against my face, faster and faster, until he finally came.
Then I was sure I was going to choke. He pulled his cock out of my mouth, and then forced my jaws shut so I wouldn't be able to spit it out. I gagged, then swallowed. Beads of sweat came out all over my face. I felt like I was going to retch, but with my jaws shut, they wouldn't even allow me to do that.
Finally he hopped off me and let me sit up for a minute. I gasped for air like a fish out of water. The boys standing around clapped and chuckled. I felt like throwing up again, but I was warned not to, or they would beat me up. Then they drew lots for who would be next to do it to me. Nobody seemed to notice how hysterical or how sick I was.
I didn't even pay attention to who won. It was all the same to me, just another horrible invasion of my body. They were all busy slapping the back of this guy who was next. A couple of them laughed then they grabbed at his balls and jerked off his cock a little to get him ready.
Again I was filled with black terror, but everybody else in the room was having a great time. This guy wanted to try something a little different. I cringed as far into the corner of the mattress as I could get, but it wasn't far enough.
This time, they dragged me to my knees on the floor. I squirmed screamed and kicked. They slapped me around for my trouble. My face was stinging and raw before I finally stopped struggling. I didn't even have the strength to try to keep my mouth shut. In a flash, this boy shoved his cock deep into my mouth, and began to work it in and out. My hands were at my sides, but they decided that I wasn't working hard enough. One of the other boys forced me to hold on to the cock in my mouth.
Every time I tried to drop my hands, they were slapped. I decided to do as I was told to get it all over in a hurry. The harder he pounded his thing down my throat, the tighter I grabbed it. I was doing it out of rage, but he liked it just the same. His moans and groans got louder and louder until I choked once more as another gusher of hot scum shot down my throat.
I was getting used to the suffering. I had discovered it was worse if I tried to hold it in my mouth than to swallow it. So I swallowed it right down. Those stupid boys took that to mean that I was getting to like it. They cheered me and hugged me like I was becoming one of the boys. Nobody saw that I was still crying. But my tears were silent. I had started to count how many of them were left, and then as soon as they let me out I would be going straight to the police.
None of them missed the chance to shoot a load into my mouth. There were ten of them in all. I was lucky if they gave me a minute in between cocks to get my breath. The ones at the end of the line complained that they had been waiting too long. Their cocks had been hard for a while from all the watching, and they were anxious to get their guns off.
I had stopped even being a human being to them. They were using me like an animal, or worse like some kind of cock-sucking machine. My throat was starting to hurt, and the taste in my mouth was so awful that I was gagging constantly, but nothing stopped the line from moving up.
Whenever they gave me a breather I pleaded with them to let me go. I even went so far as to promise I would come back and do the rest of them another day. But they knew better than that. There wasn't one boy of the bunch who was willing to be outdone by the others.
Everyone wanted their turn, and they all wanted it at the same time. Towards the end, when they could see that I was really exhausted, they started fighting over who would be next because they were afraid I would faint or drop dead before they got their rocks off in my mouth. Not one of them had any sympathy for me. All they cared about was what happened to their cocks.
I sort of went into a daze somewhere around the middle of the line. It seemed like it went on forever, or that it was the same guy who kept shooting and shooting. Every muscle in my body was numb and my brain had been turned off by the third or fourth guy.
Somehow, later it was over with. I fell to the floor exhausted and they left me alone in that back room for a while. I guess I fell asleep, or maybe I passed out. All I know is when I opened my eyes next it was starting to get chilly, and I decided it must have been close to suppertime.
Some guy came back into the room. He brought some ginger ale with him and made me drink it. I refused at first, supposing it was another trick, but it wasn't. My thirst and the horrible, cottony taste in my mouth, made me decide to try it.
It was frosty cold and I wanted to gulp it down, but he wouldn't let me. He forced me to drink it slowly. Then he dipped his handkerchief in what was left and sponged my lips with it. I hadn't noticed until then that they were cracked and swollen.
I wanted to be grateful to him for showing me even that simple kindness, but once I had gotten a good look at his face, I remembered that he was the ringleader. I tried to spit at him, but I didn't have any saliva to do it with.
As it turned out, he wasn't being kind to me at all. He was just being smart. They all came back into the room then and they told me that I better not dare to tell anyone what had happened down there. Right now I was their friend, and if I was smart I would want to keep things that way. I was offered another soda then, but I refused. I understood what it meant now.
They said they would tell anyone' who found out that I had begged them to let me suck them off, and that I had asked for money when it was over. Even I understood that it was the word of all of them against only mine. I didn't think anyone would believe me, especially since I was pretty much of a loner, and some of the other parents were always saying how I was a little strange.
Truth, is they really didn't have to warn me so much. I would have rather died than tell anyone what they did to me. I was too disgusted and ashamed to ever mention it to anyone. I only hoped and prayed that I could forget it ever happened.
The thought that ten boys had taken their filthy, smelly pricks, the thing they piss with, and actually shoved it into my mouth was too much to live with. I did my very best to block it out of my mind.
And I managed to keep it down very well for several years. Even as I got into the high school swing of things, I did manage to date a few boys, until they tried to kiss me. That would always throw me into a panic.
In fact, it was so bad that I never wanted to date a boy whose pants were too tight, especially if I could tell that he had a big one. Just the sight of a prominent penis was enough to send me into hysterics. Through no fault of the boy, I immediately regarded him as some sort of a monster and that would be the end of the relationship.
That's the way it went until I met this guy and really fell for him. We even managed to pet a little, which is saying something for me. But I never touched his prick and he never asked me to. I tried, but I never got up the courage to tell him what had happened to me when I was young.
He's really my knight in armor. He seems to know what's troubling me without my having to say a thing about it. In fact, he was so kind and understanding of me that I started to feel really guilty about not being able to give more of myself.
He was making me feel good about being with men again, and making me feel glad to be a woman. But I still found myself unable to have sexual desire for him. I knew he had love for me and also sexual desire. It was easy to tell that many times I left him in a sexually frustrated condition.
There was no way I could make myself have intercourse with him. So there was only one alternative that I knew of. The thought popped into my mind immediately, and the next thing, the whole horrible nightmare of the day in the cellar came rushing back I broke out in a cold sweat and started to shake. Here I was so many years later, trying to find a way to make someone I loved temporarily happy and those damn boys were still ruining my life. How could I even think of taking his cock into my mouth? It would be filthy, nauseating. And if I got those feelings about this guy too, then I would be sure to lose him.
Do you know how I got around it? I forced myself to think about all the nice qualities he had. Then I started to think about all the good times we had together. The whole lovely quality of our relationship once more made me feel good all over, and I realized that what had happened to me when I was a small girl had nothing to do with the feelings I had for this man.
What I would do for him would be a gift of love and share nothing in common with what had happened in the past. Still, it took several dates before I could actually bring myself to do it to him. I think it was more his loving ways than anything else, that finally brought me to do it.
We had such a good time that evening, and I was filled with this close, warm feeling I always have when I'm with him. I remember we were standing in the hallway and it was pouring rain. We clung together, shivering from the damp cold.
I remember that he had opened his coat and tried to wrap the two of us in it. It all seemed so natural. I just reached down and unzipped his pants. Then I reached into his shorts and started rubbing his prick.
It popped right out at me and still I didn't get scared. In fact, I was rather pleased with myself. He had this big smile on his face and he kissed the top of my head. That was all the encouragement I needed.
I just looked up at him and told him how much I loved him. Then I told him that I was about to show him how much. I said that I was hungry for him and this was the only way.
Then I knelt right down in that tiny hallway, still covered by his coat and took his prick in my mouth. I just gobbled it right up without thinking twice about it, and kept right on sucking until he came in my mouth.
That's when I kind of blacked out. I think it was the taste of the come that did it to me. My head was reeling. I was back in that cellar again and he was one of those awful boys. I know he was saying some pretty things to me, but all I could hear was the terrible catcalls of those boys.
I stood right up, and then tore up the stairs. I couldn't even look him in the face. I'm sure he still has no idea of what happened and why I ran away. He's tried to call me several times since then, but I won't take his calls. He must think I'm crazy.
At this point, I know that I will either have to tell him the truth of my past, or else just let things go the way they are now and lose him.
CONCLUSION
^
In this case, the girl was able to suppress her deep-seated disgust of the male organ for a long period of time. Either the derogatory things she had heard about sex as a child, or the mass assault on her person during her impressionable years would have been more than enough to turn her against men. With both, it was no wonder that she was a very troubled young lady.
But the fact that she was able to fall in love with a young man, and to actually make the attempt to perform fellatio on him shows strong evidence of a healthy sex drive under it all. What remained for this patient was only to explore the good feelings that were now surfacing and to let them overtake the unhappy past.
CASE HISTORY SIX
^
Subject: Eva C; Age: Seventeen
INTERVIEW ONE
Eva was an attractive young woman, just on the point of bursting into beauty. Her healthy, young body seemed to glow with exuberant life. Her eyes were sparkling and clear and filled with curiosity and drive of the young.
She seemed to fill my staid office with her own light and I took an instant like to her vibrant self. She was totally at ease in my office and she gave me the impression that she would be totally at ease with any other surrounding.
We talked for awhile about pleasantries, she told me of the many activities that she had a fondness for, tennis, riding, skiing, dancing, painting, etc. There were so many things it seemed that she liked to do and she did well.
Anyone who did not know her well, would have said that here was a wonderfully healthy girl full of well-channeled energies. As it turned out, Eva had other activities that she was fond of that a less liberal person might find objectionable. This is what Eva told me on our first interview.
I am a lucky girl, Doctor, and don't you think that I am not aware of that. I have always had everything that I wanted. My father is immensely rich, I don't even know how he makes his money, but I have everything any person in the world could possibly wish for.
We live in a beautiful, enormous home set on well manicured and interesting grounds, acres and acres that belong to my father. I am just turned seventeen, but I have seen more of the world than probably most people will see in a lifetime. Perhaps that is true in a sexual way as well as a geographical way, too.
My mother died when I was very young. I never really missed having a mother, my father has always been so good to me. I can always remember him as a friend, as a person who was always there when I needed him. He truly loves me.
But when I was fourteen I discovered some things about my father that were surprising. Here is what happened.
It was a winter evening. It was fairly late and I had been in bed for some time. But I was unable to sleep. You see, the next day we were to be leaving for Europe and I was terribly excited about that.
I didn't want my father to be angry with me for not going to sleep so I crept out of bed, deciding to go look for a book to read in the library. As I approached the library, I heard voices, many voices.
But the voices sounded very strange, hardly real, or else like the monotone voices one might hear on TV. They were coming from the library. I hesitated at the door. They sounded stranger and stranger, almost like someone was in pain or something. It was eerie.
My curiosity was piqued however and I determined to find out what was going on in the library. Here is what I did. You see, the house that we live in is very old. Pre-revolutionary in some sections. The library is one of those sections. The house is riddled with secret passageways. When I was a kid I delighted in those things, it was like living in a fun house. Of course I had not played in the passageway for many years, but now I remembered that one of them led directly to a shelf in the library and that by removing a book one could see exactly what was going on in that room. I hurried to find the entrance. The closest entrance was in a kitchen nearby behind the fireplace. I got all dirty and sooty going through there, but it didn't seem to matter. I felt my way up the dark passageway, feeling cobwebs brushing into my hair and over my arms. It was creepy, but I felt like it was an adventure, I imagined that I was a revolutionary spy.
When I got to the library I removed one of the panels and the carefully pulled a book to one side. I was surprised to see how dark the room was, so I pulled the book out completely.
My eyes had become very accustomed to darkness as I had made my way up the darkness of the passageway, so consequently the darkness in the library was like daylight to me.
There was a movie screen up there and I could see it perfectly. I stifled a gasp in my throat at what the people were doing in that movie. I stifled another gasp when I recognized some of the people who were doing it in that movie.
One of the women was the upstairs maid, Hennie. She was "totally naked and she had huge tits. They were crowned with dark brown nipples and those too, were very large. Her pubic hair was dark brown the same color as her nipples and there was a lot of that too.
I was only fourteen; I had never really seen another woman naked, especially a woman older than me, someone who was really developed. It blew my mind.
But what was even more mind fucking was the naked man that was with Hennie. I had never ever seen a man naked, not even a little boy. I had never really thought about such things up until that point. The man must have been about thirty, he had a handsome face, he was tall. But he was sporting the largest, most purple erection that anyone could ever have imagined.
At first it didn't even connect in my head what that thing between his legs was. I thought instantaneously that he was diseased, that perhaps the woman was diseased, too and that this was some kind of medical movie.
I looked around the room and saw that my father was sitting on the sofa. Sitting next to him was the man in the movie! They both looked very serious about what they were watching. I had never thought that my father was interested in medicine, but perhaps this man was a friend of his that he was helping out.
Well, I was a fool, but I continued to watch the movie, hoping that I would learn something. Boy, did I! The man began to fondle the woman's tits. He rubbed them with the palms of his hands for a very long time. Then he stuck his face on one of her nipples and began to suck with his mouth.
The woman threw her head back, she appeared to either be hating this or loving it. I could not tell at the time.
The movie was accompanied with a sound track and there were moans that the woman was making and an exaggerated slurping noise that the man was making while he sucked on her tits.
His other hand now dove down her belly to the patch of hair between her legs. The hand rubbed at her cunt furiously and the woman squirmed about on the palm. The man stuck two fingers up her hole and began to fuck the woman's cunt with his fingers. She must have liked that, but she acted very strangely.
She would hump herself back and forth on the fingers, rubbing her body hard against his hand. Meanwhile, the guy continued to suck her tit also. The woman was getting very aroused, although I did not know this at the time.
The man took his mouth off of her tit and his whole body slid down to his knees. He once again separated her cunt lips with his fingers so that I could see the inside of her snatch. A thing that I had never done, not even to myself.
I was very surprised at what the man did next. He stuck his whole face into her snatch. I nearly threw up, as far as I knew, that was the place that your piss came out of and near the other place where shit came out of.
But what surprised me even more was that the man seemed to be enjoying thoroughly what he was doing. He rammed his mouth into her cunt and I saw his tongue come out. He licked her cunt lips and he licked her thighs, he swirled his tongue around her clitoris and the woman acted so crazy. She slid her body around and around on his face and she threw her hands up like she didn't know what to do with them.
She made these low animal sounds, like a cat in heat.
I could now see that the man was sticking his tongue up her hole and this drove the woman to further craziness. She slammed her cunt down on his face and rubbed it all over his mouth. She whimpered and she groaned and she flailed her arms about like he was killing her or something.
I guess what was happening to Hennie, the upstairs maid was that she was having an orgasm. Whatever, she was enjoying all this very thoroughly, though I couldn't have known it at the time.
After he took his face out of her cunt, he stood up and picked her up in his arms. He carried her to a bed that I recognized as my father's. It is a terribly ornate brass bed in an unusually large size. The camera showed them at all angles.
The man pulled her legs apart again and the camera zoomed into her crotch. I saw everything very closely again, her pink cunt lips looked all slippery and wet from the man's spit and from her own cream.
The woman still moaned effusively, but now the man was between her legs. His hand again went to her crotch, but his other hand was wrapped around his big, fat cock. He jerked the hand up and down and, the camera zoomed in to that for a close-up. It zoomed in so close that I could see drops of liquid oozing out from the end of the man's cock.
He moved in for the kill. And so did the camera. He pushed her legs far apart and mounted her, he presented his cock to her cunt entrance and then he rammed it in with one push. The woman screamed and I nearly shit in my pants.
He began to squeeze and caress her tits again and the woman wiggled about on the bed like a flaming snake. The man pressed his body into her and soon he began to fuck her.
The man slammed his cock into Hennie. She wiggled about on the bed and tossed her cunt up and he continued to slam his thing down into her. The camera zoomed in again and I could see that his cock was throbbing and wet when it came out of the woman.
It throbbed and hit her faster and faster. He rammed his thing into her cunt more and more. I began to like the way that she humped back up to him and I began to like the way he pumped his cock into her.
He crammed her body full of prick. I heard them panting and sobbing. He humped her furiously. His cock was slimy and sticky. The woman panted and then screamed as he pumped her full of his meat.
They ground their bodies together tightly. She slipped around on the bed. He humped her very rhythmically, very fast and very hard. He ground his cock into her. She rotated her hips, she moved her body in strange ways.
They were humping very fast, they had lost control. I wondered what was going to happen. He plunged into her again and again. She writhed and winded, she humped his cock and he humped her cunt.
He shoved his thing into her a few more times, he gripped her body and kept pumping.
Suddenly he pulled his throbbing, wet cock out of her cunt and the woman jumped up, she dove between his legs and snapped her mouth around the head, she swallowed him, she swallowed all of him and now her face humped him the way her cunt had.
Her face was distorted and distended, but she bobbed back and forth on his cock with a great energy. She was swallowing him, she was fucking his cock with her mouth.
Suddenly the man acted very strangely, grabbing at her head and pushing her down further on the cock. Making her hump him faster making her take more and more of his swollen cock.
He groaned, a long low sound like death. And the camera moved to her face and I could see that she was gulping. I wondered what it was. I knew that something was coming out of that cock, but I didn't know what. I thought maybe she was drinking his piss, but was I ever wrong.
The man pulled out of her and they caressed each other. Abruptly they both looked one way and they began to greet another person.
I soon saw who it was, it was Betty, the girl who worked on the kitchen on special occasions. She was a pretty girl, blonde and thin.
She, too, was totally naked.
She bounced on the bed next to the couple that had just fucked. They didn't wait long. Hennie dove in between the girl's legs. Betty pretended to be putting up a fight and the man held her down so that Hennie could get where she wanted to.
As soon as Hennie was down in the girl's cunt, she started to do the same thing that the man had done to her only she seemed to pay more attention to the woman's clitoris.
Betty soon stopped trying to get away and she began to slither about on the bed the same way that Hennie had.
Betty gasped as the camera zoomed down for a close up of what was happening in her cunt. Hennie flicked her tongue out and licked up Betty's flowing juices. Betty grasped Hennie's head in her hands and forced Hennie down harder into her cunt.
Hennie greedily licked up and down in her cunt. She thrust pert pink cunt up at Hennie and Hennie ate her out. She slurped up the pussy, she panted and licked at the flowing snatch.
Hennie took the folds of her cunt into her mouth. She sucked on them. She found the clit and started working on it again. She sucked and nibbled on it. She was enjoying it so much, that much was apparent.
Betty was gasping and thrusting her box up at Hennie while the man still held her upper body down. He now began to play with her tits. Betty forced the head hard against her snatch and the other woman ground her mouth onto her.
Hennie sucked on the labia folds, she nibbled them. The cunt was very wet now, Hennie shoved her mouth harder and harder against the body.
She continued to lick and to lap, she rubbed her lips up and down the vertical slit. Betty started trembling and shaking violently. She ground her twat against Hennie's sucking face. She whined and thrust her cunt out at her friend.
She screamed several times as the cream of cunt gushed out at the other girl, who licked it up like ambrosia. The woman was greedily eating out the orgasm juices, her ass was sticking up in the air and I had a good look at her newly fucked cunt.
The camera showed us the man again. His cock which had grown limp for awhile, had now attained a full hard-on. I couldn't believe it, I wondered at the time what the hell kind of disease these people had.
Well, that movie went on and on, but what I finally realized was that I had a strange feeling between my legs. I stuck my hand down there and found it very wet, it felt almost as if I had wet my pants or something.
It felt so strange, strangely good. I touched myself some more. I had never explored it down there. I touched my lips, my clitoris and then I stuck just one finger up inside that tight, small hole.
I stuck it up as far as I could go and suddenly a feeling came over me like I had never had before. It spread throughout my whole body, it took me out of myself, I nearly fainted against the wall. I thought that I was dying, that I had done something wrong, that I had the disease those other people had.
I had had my first orgasm.
This indeed was a very interesting story that Eva was telling me, but unfortunately there were other people waiting to speak with me and I had to ask her to wait until next week before she came in and told more of herself.
She agreed to this and left my office, promising that there was lots more to tell.
INTERVIEW TWO
Eva returned to me as promised and after some more of her preliminary small talk she went right into her story as if she had never left my office.
Well, Doctor, after that I felt like I was made of jelly. My legs would hardly carry me down that narrow, dark chamber out to the kitchen. I wasn't very careful and I probably made a lot of noise, but there was no one there to see me as I crawled out from behind the fireplace and snuck up to my bedroom.
Strange as it might seem, I had no trouble getting to sleep in fact, they had to wake me up in the morning, something that nobody had ever done. I had always been practically the first one awake in the household every morning for as long as I had been alive.
Well, I didn't say anything to my father about what I had seen, even though my mind was consumed with a million questions about those people and about what I, myself had felt.
I waited until we were at our villa in southern France and only then because I again witnessed a similar incident.
Again, it was evening, but it was warm and wonderful outside. I had trouble sleeping, so I decided to go outside and maybe take a swim in the pool. I did it stealthily so that my father would not know I was up.
I heard voices coming from one part of the villa. It was sort of a ballroom and one whole side of the place were enormous glass, french doors. I crept up to look in the windows. My mouth hung open at what I saw.
There were about five people in the room. One was operating the lights of which there were many. Then, there were two men and one woman.
The men were all dressed, but they were in the process of undressing the woman. When they had removed all of her clothes, they placed her on a sofa.
One of them spread her legs and then unzipped his pants. He pulled out a stiff cock and then mounted her. He didn't fool around much, but went right into her.
The other man adjusted her head on the arm of the couch and then unzipped his pants and pulled out his dong which was hard and red. He began to work it into her mouth.
They fucked her like that. One in her mouth and one in her cunt. They really got it on in her body and she seemed to be digging it, too.
They had strange expressions on their face, they were smiling wickedly and shoving their dicks into her body. They fucked her hard, fast and they did it until I could see creamy come dripping out of her mouth and out of her cunt.
The really strange thing about all of this was that my father was the cameraman. He was jumping all around them, filming the mouth and cunt fucking from every angle.
It wasn't until he turned around that I saw that he, too, had his pants unzipped and an enormous blood-engorged cock stuck out towards the french doors.
I nearly fainted. I was terribly turned on, again my cunt was wet and that strange feeling was creeping throughout my groin and up and down my legs.
But seeing my father's cock like that really blew my mind. It was too much. I had to say something to him.
The next morning at breakfast I took the opportunity. He was drinking espresso and reading one of the French newspapers. I waited until he felt me starring at him.
He looked at me.
"Yes, Eva, did you wish to ask me something?"
"Yes, father, I want to make a small confession."
"All right, child, what is it?"
"Well, here goes . . and I told him everything I had seen back home and then the night before. I did not tell him that I had been so aroused and all.
He was silent for a long time. I thought perhaps that he was angry, but finally he smiled and then he started to laugh. It made me nervous and I asked him why he was laughing.
"It's just that I find it amazing that you take it all so calmly. But tell me, Eva, how did all of this, all of what you saw affect you?"
He slowly worked it out of me that I had had an orgasm. Of course I did not know this, but he explained it all thoroughly to me. He then went on to say, that making these movies was a hobby of his, in fact it was one of the things that he enjoyed most of all.
We talked a long time about what he did for a hobby and then he asked me if I would like to participate. Since it was my father asking me, I thought that it would be all right and so I said that I would.
It was about a week later that the next filming was to happen. I pretty much forgot all about making the movie, until my father reminded me that morning that if I still wanted to the movie was to happen that night.
All day long I thought about nothing else. I could hardly wait to see what would happen.
When the time came, my father came to my room and brought me to the ballroom. He introduced me to the lightman and to several other people who were there.
They were all very attractive, but older people. Two women and two men. I asked my father what I was to do and he told me that there was nothing, that these people knew exactly what to do and all that I had to do was just go along with them.
He said that if there was anything that I didn't like to tell him and he would stop the whole thing.
I was very nervous. But I was excited too, already I could feel my little pussy getting all wet and funny feeling.
They got everything set up and then they began.
I was placed on the sofa and the adults crowded around me. They started to undress me and to undress themselves, they said funny things, like, "Ooooooh, I'll bet she has the nicest little cunt in the world such a pretty little girl." And "Ah, I can't wait to get my cock up inside of her." They kept saying things like that until we were all naked.
I felt especially naked since all the women had large tits and hairy mounds and I had no tits and no hair on my cunt practically.
But they kept complimenting my little body and then they started to kiss me all over. A woman kissed my face and my neck, while a man kissed my tits and my belly. Someone was even kissing my feet and that made me laugh.
It was all very ticklish and I guess that's where my father got the idea, because he handed someone a peacock feather, then someone else, until everyone had a feather and they were tickling me and tickling each other.
A woman kissed me on the mouth. She tasted pretty good. She sucked on my lower lip. She stroked my hair. I moved my lips over hers and I shot my tongue into her mouth. She pulled on my lips and sucked my tongue.
We kissed a few more times, sucking on each other's tongues and lower lips. She rubbed her hands over my tits, I found myself reaching for her tits and rubbing those big mounds. I touched the nipples.
I wanted to suck on them. I stroked her breasts more. I worked them over. She held me close to her and kissed my lips and purred from the stroking I was giving to her tits.
Someone's hand was between my legs, rubbing my thighs, it felt good, it felt warm.
I grabbed hold of a thick, solid cock. It felt warm. Finally I got down to those nipples. I worked my tongue over them and tasted her salty skin. I sucked on those things and I loved it, I sucked harder as if I would get milk from them.
The hand on my thigh was creeping up to my little snatch. I felt the hand separating my thighs so that they could reach my little cunt.
It felt good sucking on that tit and it felt good that hand creeping up to my snatch.
Suddenly she pulled away from me and pointed next to us, down on the floor. It was very interesting so we watched, while the hand which belonged to the man sitting next to me continued to play with my upper thighs.
The woman beneath us was on top of the other man. She was working his cock in her hand. And pretty soon she began to eat his prick. She worked her mouth up and down on the organ. The man was heaving and groaning already.
I was very excited from all of this. She worked the cock in and out of her mouth, she flicked her tongue up and down on the shaft. She licked and slurped the cock all over.
She pulled on the head of the cock with her lips. She pursed her lips around the cockhead and she started to suck the thing hard. I liked the way she was doing it and thought that I might like to try it myself.
She pulled it into her mouth some more and she worked her mouth up and down on it. I thought that I was going to explode just from watching. She pulled the thing in and out of her mouth and suddenly the man began to maneuver his body around until they lay in a sixty-nine position.
He put his mouth into her twat. He blew on the warm, wet muff. He worked his hand up and down on her legs. He rubbed her inner loins.
The woman gasped from pleasure.
He worked his mouth onto her pussy and she worked the cock back into her mouth. He worked his tongue into her snatch and she seemed to really like that, she thrust her cunt back and forth as he worked his tongue into her hole. He licked out her cunt. He licked it good.
He sucked on the folds and she ground her pussy into his face. I could smell her cunt from where I was sitting and the woman still played with my little titties and I played with hers and the man's hand had reached my own snatch now and was tickling my clitoris.
I was so absorbed in all this that I hardly noticed that my own father was jumping around us to and fro with a camera and not only that, but with a huge, red erection poking out from his pants. I looked up at him and smiled. He smiled back at me.
The woman below me pulled the cock into her mouth. She nibbled on the head. She sucked hard on the balls. She licked the dude's nuts, she worked her hand on the cock, when it was out of her mouth.
She kissed the head of the cock and she tongued the piss slit, they were both writhing about on the floor and sucking and tonguing each other's genitals.
She worked the cock in and out of her mouth and nibbled the base of the tool, the tool was thrust in and out of her mouth now as she ground her pussy onto the guy's face. He worked his mouth into her faster and faster.
They ate each other faster and faster. I loved watching them, it was totally arousing. Suddenly, they were going faster and faster until they looked like tongue machines.
But I couldn't watch any longer. The man and the woman on the couch were positioning me differently. The man was pulling me down onto his, right onto his prick which was rigid and red.
The woman was caressing me all over. They laid me out on the couch and spread my legs. The woman was quick to go down on me and suck on my clitoris. I was terribly aroused. I felt like I would explode at any minute.
I was squirming like I had worms.
The man now pushed the woman away from me and came at my cunt with his fingers. He pried it open with his fingers. He pried open my slit and then he tried to mount me. He shoved his cock to the entrance of my cunt.
He placed his cockhead right there, right at the beginning of my cunt hole. He pushed a little bit. I cried out, it really hurt. His cock was so big and I was so little. I didn't want to stop though, I wanted to see the whole thing through. I wanted to be fucked, I wanted to be filmed fucking.
I was so aroused by everything. The man was grunting and looking down at my face while his hand worked his cock into my cunt.
It stuck, he found the opening, his cock was in me, now further and further. It was going further into my cunt, prying me apart, causing me pain. It was so big, so filling, so hard.
I screamed a little, but I continued to writhe with my arousal. I forgot everything. I had an instant orgasm. I creamed all over the half-inserted cock.
The man smiled and pushed harder, now that I had come it made ascension easier. He shoved his cock into me. It filled me to overflowing.
He began to hump me, grunting and moaning. He slammed his thing into me. I felt the way that he moved, I liked the way that that stranger was fucking me. I pumped back up at him and he plunged down into me, I thrust up my cunt and he plowed me with his dick.
He fucked me faster and faster, I humped up at him, and he humped down at me. It was wonderful! He fucked me. He fucked me harder and harder. He worked that cock in and out of me. He slammed his prick against my groin.
I slammed my pelvic bone against his and we rocked and pumped and I felt like laughing for joy. He gripped my ass and shoved his cock in and out of me. His body began to go stiff and I arched my own spine against the couch while my pelvis worked like a machine.
We worked harder and harder. I pumped my body against his fast fucking cock, and he began to throb and to groan and to open and close his eyes like he was going insane.
He stabbed me hard with his cock, harder and harder until I felt it! The hot sperm burst into my little cunt with a deep explosion from his body, from his flaming cock.
He cried out and so did I.
He fucked me a few more times and then pulled out, I was a little disappointed but not for long. The woman who had kissed me and who's titties I had sucked went down on me right away. She began to suck my clitoris.
It was too much I went into a chain of ripping orgasms that threatened to end my existence permanently. I screamed and I squirmed and I came all over the place.
Much more went on that night, but when I finally fell asleep on the couch, my father covered me with a blanket until they were finished filming.
I woke up the next morning in my own bedroom.
I'm seventeen now, Doctor, and if I could tell you how many scenes like that I've seen and participated in you would probably would not believe me.
I really enjoy making those films. Of course, nobody will ever see them but my father and his few close friends, most of whom I've had one way or the other.
The only thing is, Doctor, is that I really want my father. I want to fuck my father. All the time now when I'm making it with someone else and he's there filming I look up and see his hard cock and I want it. I want it really bad.
Do you think that I'm sick, Doctor, that both my father and I should be locked up?
CONCLUSION
^
It is my conclusion that Eva has been making these films all these years because she really wants her father. By doing the films, she is indirectly fucking her father: she is certainly arousing him.
I asked Eva if her father had any real sexual contact. And she said, no, not to her knowledge. So it became apparent to me that the only sexual pleasure that her father gets is by making these films, that he is a confirmed voyeur.
He seems to be very happy and adjusted to this form of stimulation and it probably would be impossible for him to enjoy sex with anyone even his own daughter.
Eva and I talked about this for a great length of time. I told her that if she wanted her father she should talk to him about it. He is obviously an open minded man and I'm sure that he would tell her the truth.
Eva my have the first disappointment of her life when he turns her down.
CASE HISTORY SEVEN
^
Subject: Tom P. Age: Nineteen
INTERVIEW ONE
Tom P. impressed me immediately as the type of young man who will end up as a stockbroker. He was dressed quite conservatively for a college student and wore his short blonde hair parted on the side. His face bore the marks of many troubled and sleepless nights. He wrung his hands as he began to explain his problem.
"Doctor I look upon this as a last resort. I've tried everything to control my problem. It's been nothing but anguish and strain for me since the middle of last summer. If I can't get this thing straightened out soon I'll have no choice but to drop out of school. I'm so confused I can't think straight or study.
"I didn't really feel all that bad, I guess, until just recently. Last week I got kicked out of my fraternity for being a peeping torn. That's going to be awfully hard to explain when my future employers start checking out my past!"
I asked Tom if he had a police record for his spying activities.
"No, of course not. I was only watching my fraternity brothers with their girlfriends. It all happened right there in the house. But I guess I should start at the beginning.
"I guess I had a pretty normal puberty. I was really curious about sex, of course, and I took every opportunity to widen my experience in that area whenever I met girls I liked. I lost my virginity when I was about sixteen and after that sex became a natural part of my life.
"That's as far as some people ever go. But I was still curious. I wondered if everybody did it the same as me. I really enjoyed looking at other men's bodies, too. Of course I wasn't sexually attracted to them, but I enjoy seeing the beauty of all naked flesh.
"For a while I had a girl friend who I sometimes think must have been a hooker on the side. She was from the "wrong" part of town so my parents weren't very happy about our relationship. Usually I respect my parents' wishes not where Susie was concerned. She turned me on more than any other girl I'd known. I think it was because her bedroom was lined with mirrors.
"Finally I was able to observe myself and my partner having sex. You have no idea how curious I'd been to see just what it looked like. It made me feel so incredibly aroused to watch Susie's motions in the ceiling mirror as she sucked my cock, to watch my ass bobbing up and down as I pumped into her cunt, to-"
Tom blushed in embarrassment as he realized how frank he had become. I reassured him by explaining that nothing he could say could possibly shock me. I have heard everything!
"Well I spent just as much time with Susie as I could until I left for college. After that she was always busy with other guys, to my regret. It was over a year before I recaptured the level of arousal I had experienced with her.
"It was last summer. I was working in a summer camp in the mountains. It was a co-ed camp so there were counselors of both sexes. There was always a lot of action late at night when all the campers had turned in. Pretty early in the season I found a girl I could get it on with. That was Linda pretty, intelligent, sexy and very available. Her girls were the same age as my boys, so we shared several activities.
"But it wasn't Linda that made the summer so exciting. One night after I'd finally got my boys bedded down and quiet I decided to take a walk through the grove behind the dining hall. I was just enjoyed the moonlight and the fragrance of the cedar trees when I heard a giggle.
"At first I thought it was one of the older girl campers who had sneaked out of her bunk, but then I heard a deep sigh that fell into a very masculine moan. Right away I felt my cock getting hard and straining against my zipper. Just knowing that two people were just about to fuck within 10 feet of me was a turn-on like nothing I'd ever known-not even Susie's mirrors.
"I held my breath, trying to locate the source of the sounds. Soon there was more sighing. It was the girl. I followed her agonized cries to the darkest area in the grove when I found a convenient cluster of thick bushes to hide behind.
"I couldn't tell who they were but just looking at them made my incipient erection swell into the biggest boner I ever had. She had her back against a tree and he was grinding his pelvis into hers while she twisted her hips forwards, into him. Their hands were travelling all over each others' bodies in a frenzy like they just didn't know which part to stroke first. Their mouths were glued together in what I could see was a very deep penetrating kiss.
"My breathing got so loud I was afraid they would hear me. I think that was just my inexperience showing. They were so involved in what they were doing that I don't think a shout would have disturbed them.
"He went down on his knees and put his arms around her legs while he bit and nibbled at her cunt lips through the tight denim of her jeans.
"She really started moaning them. She grabbed his head with her hands and pulled him harder into her. He was making growling noises like an animal and that seemed to turn her on almost as much as what he was doing with his teeth and the heat of his breath.
"Pretty soon she got so weak from all the stimulation that her knees buckled and she slipped down to the ground with her legs all spread apart. That made me get so aroused I felt my cock head pushing out the waist of my tight jeans. I had to unzip my fly and let my huge cockflesh swing free. The night breeze felt so good against that hot hunk of flesh. I started stroking it, going up and down the shaft in smooth gentle motions that ended with a gentle squeeze on the head. I was really panting by this time. I wanted to see her cunt flesh uncovered by that thick denim.
"I still couldn't recognize them but I could see that she was really a beautiful chick. Her body was firm and taut by also very voluptuous. Her tits were heavy and conical with big round nipples tipping each one. She looked like she was about seventeen and her hair was a froth of wild blonde curls. The guy was also really well put-together with plenty of strength in his arms and legs. His belly was flat and tight and he had a prominent chin that was set off well by his thick dark hair.
"Well he fulfilled my wish pretty quickly. He undid the top of her jeans and pulled them off her beautiful legs. Her cunt was covered in a thick matted bush the same color as the hair on her head. And when she moved her legs apart I could see the silky wet red flesh of its center just waiting to be penetrated.
"When he took off her shirt my cock seemed to leap and my caresses became quicker and firmer. Her body was milky white on her tits and crotch but everything else was deeply tanned. The lines of her bikini were clearly outlined around the strategic areas.
"As soon as she was naked she began tearing at his clothes giggling and laughing as she worked. His cock fairly flew out of the confines of his tight pants, swinging and swaying from its root. It was surrounded by a nest of heavy coarse black hair, but the rest of his body was hairless, except for his armpits. She really went crazy when she got his cock in her hands.
She went down on it greedily as she knelt between his legs. I could hear the slurping noises as the slowly drew the head into her mouth and worked it over between her lips. He was screaming and moaning and throwing his hips up into her mouth, trying to get her to take the whole length of it into her mouth. But she pushed him down and took her sweet time.
Each millimeter of his cock travelling into her mouth made me envy him more and more. She took the shaft in slowly and noisily. I could tell she really enjoyed the sensations it was arousing in her. I mean I knew she loved the taste of it, the texture, the aroma. That chick really knew how to suck cock and if you couldn't tell by watching her work you could tell by the way he was carrying on.
"I spit into my hands and started pumping my cock with quick two-fisted strokes. Meanwhile she was tugging at his balls with her fingers. She stuck a finger straight up his asshole just as she reached the root of his cock and buried her nose into his thick black cock hair. He jerked and gasped and grabbed even harder at her head, pulling her roughly down on his pole.
She worked up and down in quick motions on his staff for a minute, working her finger in and out of his asshole at the same time. But then she turned around so her pussy was directly over his open mouth. Slowly she lowered herself until she was sitting on his face.
For a minute she was unable to suck his cock and I could see her face contorted with ecstasy as he sucked her pussy inside and out. He was pulling her hips down into his face and making noises like he was slurping soup from a plate. Soon she was able to go back to her work and she went at it like never before. They looked like a huge strange lump of flesh from the same organism they were clamped into each other so tight.
My cock was straining from the sight of them. I felt like sneaking up behind them and thrusting my hot meat deep into her little bunghole while he sucked out her cunt. It was hard to restrain myself by I had to content myself with my own strokes and the vision before me.
The girl started coming in waves of passion that rocked through her body and made her grind her cunt down so that it was split apart over his nose and mouth and tongue. She seemed to swallow his scrotum and his cock at the same time. I could tell that the head of it was extending well into her throat. How she breathed I'll never know.
"God, I'm sweating now just thinking about it. She must have come for about 10 minutes before he pushed her up and turned her around so her cunt was spread out over his cock. He was such a strong bastard he just picked her up as he laid there. He was ready to fuck now after getting her so delirious and juicy that her cunt was like a tight socket of spongy, firm heat. She was so hot and horny all she wanted was to get reamed by the pole that was thrust up beneath her.
"He was still holding her up over him you see. Well he just sort of let her down and his dick sliced right up her cunt. She was dripping come juice all over his belly as his cockflesh displaced all the liquid in her slot. They started pumping right away. He lifted his pelvis up each time she came down in her staccato rhythm.
"I could tell my cock was about to shoot its load. My hands moved faster and faster on the shaft, lubricated by drops of pre-come that kept appearing at the tip.
"Her hair was flying all over the place as she leaned into him. She reached out and grabbed his shoulders, caressing them and massaging them. Sometimes she reached down and squeezed his nipples. When she did he moaned and groaned. You would have thought they were locked away in total privacy. They seemed totally oblivious to any threat of discovery. They weren't even trying to be quiet. I suppose their moans and cries aroused them.
"He moved his hands from her hips and held onto her tits like handles, using them to pull her into him. She really loved that. She started coming like I've never seen a woman come. It was amazing. She became like an animal in her furious, inevitable frenzy. She made long low feral noises that seemed to penetrate into the center of my body.
"That was it for me. My aching cock burst into explosions of come that spurted out in thick white globules and fell on my thighs and the ground between my legs.
"The guy kept tossing his hips up into her and massaging her tits. I could see that her coming was taking him close to his own release. He stared into her face totally transfixed, the passion building higher and higher in his loins as he watched her transform into something sub-human or else beyond human.
"She began to get tired and let up on her rhythm. It was like her body just didn't have the strength to keep up. That's when he started taking over. It was like a different act now that he took the dominant role and set the rhythm.
"He moved her back a little so that his cock was penetrating her swollen cunt lips at an angle almost horizontal to his body. Then he pulled her in and pushed her back in quick, short strokes that made his tool slide in and out of her cunt in the same way a piston works-and just as smoothly.
"My cock was just shuddering its last and my whole body seemed to be so exhausted and limp that even if they'd suddenly looked up and seen me I don't think I could have stirred. I felt just as if I had laid the most beautiful, sensuous woman in the world. That's how exciting it was for me to watch these two.
"The boy was getting hotter and hotter. His breath was coming in quick gasping breaths. Sweat was coating his body, running down his firm, muscled flesh in glistening droplets. He slipped her faster and faster into his cock. She began to come again completely limp this time and taking all her cues from him-but coming just as dramatically. At the same time he grunted and made several last desperate pulls as if he were trying to push his cock all the way through the end of her cunt. He fell back panting but still feeling all over her body as if her were trying to memorize every little curve and roundness of it.
"She fell off to the far side of him and reached her under her leg to fondle his balls. Then they started giggling again. They were really into it.
"I found my strength returning to me and figured I'd better slip away before they started looking around. I tucked my dick back into my jean and closed the zipper. I just looked back once before I tiptoed away. They were playing with each other's bodies affectionately and talking to each other in low voices. I figured they must have been in love or something.
"By the time I got back to my bunk it was almost 3 A.M. I went to bed right away, since we had to be up at 6. As I went to sleep I thought about what I'd just done and seen. Well, Doctor, I realized right away that it was pretty perverted. I'd read about voyeurism in one of my psychology courses. But somehow I didn't care. I just couldn't wait 'til the next night when I could go out looking for more action.
Unfortunately, I had to stop Tom just as he was about to launch into a description of his next encounter with observation of sex. Our first hour was up. He was so eager to continue with our interviews that I agreed to see him again later in the week.
As Tom left my office, once again for all the world a young financier, I pondered his case thoughtfully. It wasn't until the following interview that I was able to reach any conclusions, however.
INTERVIEW TWO
The next time I saw Tom P. he looked a little less troubled. He walked into my office almost gaily and sat down with a smile.
"You know, Doctor," he began, "I felt about a hundred percent better after I left your office last time. It just took such a load off my mind to be able to talk frankly about this problem of mine without meeting disapproval or disgust. I must tell you that my former friends weren't so understanding.
"All the rest of the summer I spent my nights wandering in the outlying areas of the camp territory. There weren't very many nights when my search wasn't rewarded by an outstanding sexual experience. I never pushed my luck by trying to join in. I was content to bring myself off while I watched.
"Watching made masturbation just as satisfying as the best experiences I'd ever had with a woman. Through the summer I was able to distinguish various couples from one another. Some were really quite skillful, others making up for their lack of skill with the intensity of their passion. I learned a lot about sex-all the ways to do it, all the ways that different people respond to the same stimuli.
"It got so I took my activities for granted, they were such an integral part of my life. But of course, camp ended within a few weeks. It was then that I realized that watching other people fuck wasn't just some kinky kind of summer fun. It was an addiction!
"Early in September school started again and I moved back into the fraternity house at State U. Once again, in the evenings I would go out roaming. I found all sorts of places where I could depend upon finding an amorous young couple to watch and masturbate with. I found windows where the shades were never drawn and there were women I watched preparing for bed every night.
"I made my rounds from one site to the next. I settled on a few windows that were my favorites.
A very long time ago there was a woman there who was married, but I guess her husband must have been away. Every night at bedtime she would take off all her clothes and then rub her whole body with creams and lotions. Sometimes she would shave her legs or something. Then she did her exercises.
She usually stood with her back to the window, facing this big full-length mirror she had in her bedroom. She'd start out touching her toes. Every time she leaned over the buns of her big beautiful white ass would part and give me a totally open view of the pink meat between her plump, hairy cuntlips. Every time she stood up I could watch her huge pink tits rolling around on her chest by the reflection in the mirror!
"This woman was really zaftig. I guess with her clothes on she might have looked a little fat. But naked she was just voluptuous and full and cushiony, yet she was also pretty firm. All her fat was in the right places. Big round jutting ass, plump, meaty thighs, huge round tits that were so big and soft she must have had trouble finding a bra big enough. She had great arms, too. Surprisingly, her waist was pretty small and that just set her wide, flaring hips off to perfection. Her face was pretty and creamy, too. She had really long, wavy hair that she wore in a bun. But during her exercises it would all come loose and start tumbling down over her shoulders and down to the middle of her back "Well, after she warmed up a little with touching her toes she did squats like some kind of ballet exercise. She'd always hold her back very straight for these and her tits would stand up so pretty. By this time she'd be sweating a little and her whole body looked slippery.
"She'd go on and on with her exercises, each one showing off another part of her body. My cock started to get hard as soon as she began touching her toes. When she did pushups is when it would get so thick and long I'd have to haul it out of my pants, usually using two hands. I loved watching the way her tits would crush out into huge pancakes beneath her and then return to shape as she lifted her body. I loved the way they looked hanging from her like that.
"I'd start stroking myself very gently and then increase the tempo of the massage gradually as she got pinker and sweatier.
"The part I loved best was when she did her leg exercises. She laid flat on the floor on her back with her head towards the mirror. This gave me a perfect frontal profile of the towers of her tits. Then she would raise her legs straight up in front of her showing the dark line of her pussy hair as it ran like a seam from the crack of her ass right over the pussy lips and into a triangle on her mount. When she had her legs straight up she parted them into a split.
"Her cunt looked like a tropical fruit splitting open right before my eyes, all pink and slippery with a gaping dark hole in the center. This woman had an incredibly big clit. The ridge of it must have been about two inches long and half an inch wide. When I saw that I wanted to sneak in and take hold of those big, fat lips and spread them even further apart so I could see that gigantic clit even better. I wanted to lean into it with my tongue and lick it and suck it still it was erect and then plunge my aching swelling cock right into her cunthole.
"Just thinking about it made me come close to shooting my load. When I added a little stroking and squeezing and two fisted massage-well." Tom sighed. "How I loved coming with that woman. I'd hold my cock with both hands like a giant hose. When I would spurt it was like holding a rocket. The come would gush out in thick globs, sometimes almost striking the window with its force.
"She kept up with her exercises even after I'd shot and fell back in exhaustion. Splitting her legs apart, closing them, splitting them again.
"After that one, she had another where she would sit straight up and then spread her legs on the floor in a split. This time I got a complete, constant unobstructed view of her wide-open cunt. She kept pushing her legs further and further apart until they would have fit flush against a wall.
"That was setting up. The real exercise was when she would grab an ankle and pull herself over to it while she kept her legs in the split. When she did that, man! First of all her cunt was spread open so much that I could see almost all the way up the hole.
Second, her tits would get all mashing against the leg she was leaning over so you could see just how squeezable and malleable they were.
"While all this was going on, my exhausted cock would start to stir again. I held my balls in my hand and rolled them around, sort of supporting my cock at the same time so it wouldn't have to work too hard to get straight and thick. Pretty soon my cockhead swelled up and turned bright red while the shaft got long and hard as an iron bar.
"The split thing was her last exercise. After that she got into bed, or rather on the bed. She always left the light on for this next part. She settled herself up there and got comfortable. Then she started rubbing her tits lightly with both hands, making circular motions that centered on her tits. When her hands started travelling down her midriff to her belly her big, flat, pink nipples would have turned into giant pink raisins.
"The veins were standing out all over my cock now so it was a luscious red shaft streaked with blue veins. I could feel the pulse beating away all over it. I just held it nestled in my hands and stroked the top of it lightly with my thumbs, working down to the head now and then. I didn't want to come too fast. I wanted to savor every instant of the experience.
"While I watched she would push her fingertips into the bush of curly black hair that carpeted her mound. She massaged the whole swelling of flesh that tapered off into long plump lips. Her chest heaved as if she were doing her most strenuous exercise. Her tugging motions would part the lips slightly-just enough so I could see that her gigantic clit was getting even bigger.
"She took her time. After a few minutes she would start to pull on her cunt lips by grasping the hairs as their tip between her fingers. She pulled the lips, stretching them out into long tabs of flesh that she allowed to snap back into place.
"By this time her clit was so swollen and engorged with blood that it protruded from between her plump cuntlips. And my cock was throbbing and jerking all on its own. I just kept stroking lightly with my thumbs, letting the sight of her do most of the work.
"Finally, she spread her legs again. Once again I saw the whole territory of her big, pulpy cunt laid upon before my eyes. She started rubbing her clit very gently along one side of it.
It was so sensitive that she really didn't even have to touch it, just rub the flesh beside it. Her clit turned even brighter red and swelled up even more so that it looked like it had a ridge of bone in it.
"She kept stroking her clit with one hand while she reached into a drawer beside the bed with her other hand. She pulled out a big, thick, long object that I couldn't make out for a second.
"Soon I realized what it was and I almost fainted. It was the biggest dildo I'd ever seen. It must have been nine inches long and three inches thick!
"Then as she poised the big imitation cock between her huge cunt lips I realized it was a vibrator. She flicked a switch and the thing began to shake and hum like you wouldn't believe.
"I thought she would stick it right up that gaping hole, but she just touched the tip of it very lightly against the tip of her clitoris. Right away her body got absolutely rigid and she clenched her teeth.
A bright red flush spread up and down her torso. She was having an orgasm. She was having about fifty orgasms in fact. I could see the hole of her cunt working open and closing up like a hungry, sucking mouth. She panted deeply and the sweat poured down her body.
"By this time I quit even stroking my cock. I was building up to a climax well enough just watching her work on herself without even touching my meat. I just rubbed the tops and inside of my thighs with my palms.
"She got to where she'd had enough orgasms in her clit and just pulled the huge vibrator down so that the tip of the thing fell into that eager, sucking cunt hole. She didn't even have to push-her cunt just sucked that bastard right inside till about five inches of it was buried in her quim.
"She gave it just a little shove and all but the last inch or so sliced right up into the depths of her cunt. She thrust it in and out gently. She didn't have to do much, the thing was shaking and jumping so much. I could see her whole cunt region jerking and vibrating. That thing was pushed all the way up her as far as it would go.
"My cock was so hot and the pulse in it was so fast that all I had to do was stroke it once or twice with my thumbs and it spurted out a big burst of come followed by two or three little spurts. I felt my eyes turn back in my head and my back arched while my cock jerked spasmodically. When it was over I felt such a sense of relief. It seemed to run through my whole body. I stuck around to watch the rest of the show, but mostly out of curiosity now instead of horniness.
"She kept stimulating herself and within a couple of seconds she was launched into another series of mountain moving orgasms. Her whole body trembled and shook for about five minutes until she had satisfied herself completely with the vibrating dildo. When she finally pulled it dripping out of her cunt she only had enough strength left to turn out the light and work herself under the sheets. She was asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.
"As I said before, this woman was one of my favorites, and you can imagine why. Sometimes I think she must have known I was there. There must have been some reason why she never considered closing the curtains.
"Everything was fine as long as I stuck to lovers in the park and people's windows. The trouble began when I discovered how convenient it was to watch activities right there in my own house.
"On the weekends almost all the guys had their girlfriends up in their rooms. Sometimes they were at it all night, sometimes only until about 2 o'clock. That's the curfew for girls living on campus. But there was action during the week, too. All in all, there was enough sex in that house to get me off at least once each night during the week and as many times as my cock could keep standing up for it on the weekends.
"It was convenient because there's a wide ledge that runs next to all the second story windows. Not many of the guys even had curtains I mean, why bother when they know they will only be living there for a few months.
"I got to where I relied so heavily on the action in the house that I quit venturing out into the town at all. As the cold weather started setting in there wasn't much action in the park and besides it got pretty cold standing outside of some remote window. At the house, I was always within two minutes of my own room.
"It wasn't until around Thanksgiving vacation that I was discovered. I don't think it would have been too bad if it was just once. I could have made it out to be some kind of prank. Unfortunately, nothing was said to me the first time I was spotted, or even the second. Some of the brothers set up a spy system to observe me for a solid week's watching.
By the time they confronted me with it they had so much evidence against me there was nothing I could say. They threatened to tell the dean and the police as well if I didn't resign from the fraternity. Not that I would have cared to stay on after that.
"Well, Doctor, after that I felt pretty frightened. I realized that I didn't have control over this compulsion of mine. I thought back to the first few times I'd done it. Even back at the start I knew it was perverted. Finally I had to admit that it was-I mean everybody in the frat made that pretty clear to me.
"Now I'm so messed up from this thing that I can't study like I used to. My grades are falling tremendously. It doesn't help any, either, that almost all my former friends now think I'm loony.
"Can you help me, Doctor. I just don't know what I'll do if you say my case is hopeless!"
CONCLUSION
^
"Tom's case was a very interesting one. Obviously his voyeuristic impulses were closely tied to the intense curiosity about his parents' sexual relationship that he had experienced as a child. Through therapeutic techniques, Tom was able to remember watching his parents engaging in the primal act on more than one occasion.
It is significant that in his spying activities he never tried to join into the activities that aroused him so much from afar. Tom had an intense desire to sleep with his mother, and to a lesser extent, a strong with to engage in sexual activities with his father as well. These impulses were so frightening to him that he never dared breach the gap between the sights that thrilled him and the reality of his sexual release.
It will be recalled that sexual experiences had always been enjoyable for Tom, but that it wasn't until he was able to watch them freely that he discovered the full depth of his sexual response.
Tom needed help in accepting his sexual feelings for his mother. After some months of therapy he was able to join into the activities he loved to watch. Of course, he still found that witnessing the sexual act intensely arousing but he was able to gain even more from these experiences when he actively joined in from time to time.
Another area that was holding Tom back, it was discovered, was his unfortunate choice of business as a career field. This is an area for which Tom, with his love of the sensual and the exotic, was entirely unsuited.
I encouraged Tom to take advantage of the broad education in sexual response that his activities as an observer had given him by switching his major to psychology. Within a few months Tom was well into his training as a sex therapist.
Tom P. became one of my most successful patients. At this writing he is a very effective and popular sex-therapist in a large Midwestern city. He found the perfect atmosphere for his appreciation of the sexual act.
CASE HISTORY EIGHT
^
Subject: Corey B. Age: Twenty-four
INTERVIEW ONE
When Corey B. made his first appointment with me, I tried to place the name for quite some time. It wasn't until the next day that I realized that he was a young man who had a reputation as something of a prodigy in the art world. At the age of 24 he was already the top in his field of nude paintings and prints.
When he came for his first interview Corey was wearing an expensive suede suit. His dark hair had been professionally styled. Everything about him exuded an air of breeding and class. I wondered if I had been mistaken about his work. This sleek, trim young man looked like a person of wealth and means, not like an artist, even a successful one.
"I hardly know where to begin, Doctor. I suppose I might as well tell you that I'm here because of my sister's urging. She believes I have a sexual disorder. I'm not too sure myself after all her hysteria over the whole thing.
I asked Corey if he were sleeping with his sister. I wondered if there were some sort of sexual difficulty in their relationship that was bothering them.
"Sleep with my sister? Of course not," he snapped. "Our relationship is entirely platonic and familial. Our parents have been dead for several years, but they left us quite well provided for. I was about 12 at the time of the accident. Of course losing our parents has brought us much closer together. My sister has become quite motherly towards me over the years.
"I went away to boarding school after my parents were killed while my sister, who was 18 at the time, stayed on the family estate to look after it. Boarding school was rather a drag for me, but our guardian, the family attorney, insisted upon it.
"All I cared to do in school was doodle in class and paint or draw after school. All they wanted me to do study Greek, Latin and Mathematics. It was a great relief to me when I could finally go back home and live with my sister and my paints.
"About the time of my return to Four Winds, Doctor, I had a rather startling experience. I used to walk around the place quite a bit in those days. After having been away so long I felt I had to reacquaint myself with the grounds.
"One day I found myself in the remote reaches of the place, where the houses for our help are. I couldn't help noticing that my sister's horse was tethered outside the house where one of our gardeners lived. This struck me as peculiar because she never permitted anyone else to ride the horse and I couldn't imagine why she would have come to this place.
"I decided to look into the window to see if the gardener, who was a young guy about my sister's age, was at home. Well, what I saw in that window nearly knocked me off my feet.
"You'll have to bear in mind that I went to a rather strict school. We were hardly ever allowed off campus, you see, and it was an all-boys school. In the summer I went to a similarly conservative summer camp which was also for boys only.
"So when I looked in that window and saw my sister slowly stripping all the clothes off our gardener I was stunned, to say the least. Dave, the gardener, had his eyes closed and his mouth half open. He was stroking her breasts through her blouse as she unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it off. She went straight down to his pants and pulled them off too. He had a whopping big erection and his cock stood thick and straight right up against his tanned, flat belly.
"He was a good looking guy and I could see why she would be attracted to him. He looked Mediterranean with dark curly hair and dark eyes and deeply tanned skin. His body, of course, was very rugged and fit from all the work he did around the place. But I just couldn't imagine how my sister could bring herself to do the things she was doing with him. "I heard him tell her to take her clothes off, that he loved to watch her strip. That tipped me off that this wasn't just some kind of impulsive thing. They must have been at this kind of thing for a long time.
"She complied quite readily with his request. I realized for the first time, perhaps, what an attractive woman my sister was. She is very slender yet she had perfect, full breasts that stand up high. Her ass is also very full and firm, yet her hips and legs are slender and well-shaped and she has a tiny waist. Her coloring is like mine-dark.
"What I was seeing was turning me on tremendously. She took off her clothes with agonizing slowness, drawing out the removal of each garment so that by the time she slipped out of her bikini panties, both Dave and I were about to pass out with excitement.
"Dave wasted no time in pulling her down on the sagging dingy bed with him saying, 'You're such an enticing little bitch!' This obviously turned her on even more. She laughed and fell all over him with million of little kisses up and down his neck and chest and arms. She worked her way down to the nest of black hair that surrounded his turgid cock, nibbling and biting all the way.
"Dave groaned and pulled her head over to his cock. To my horror she took the head of it into her mouth and pretty soon she had swallowed most of its length. I had never seen anything like it in my life. I never dreamed a woman would do such a thing, much less my own sister.
"However, it wasn't long before my horror gave way to a kind of fascination. I began to get very horny indeed and my cock was straining against the confines of my clothing.
"She gobbled his cock greedily and he was appreciating every second of it. Then he started to do something that totally floored me. He moved so quickly I didn't really see what was happening. The next thing I knew she was lying on the bed and he was over her on his hands and knees with his cock in her mouth and his mouth in her muff.
"My sister squealed, pausing for a moment to catch her breath. Then she went back to her sucking, wrapping her legs around his shoulders so that he got the fullest possible access into her pussy.
"They worked away at each other until they each were just about to come. Dave stopped and whispered something to Marie. She said something like 'Oh yes! How luscious!' "
"Once again they blew my mind entirely. Marie got up, stood on the floor facing the bed and leaned over so that her creamy ass cheeks were spread out. Dave stood behind her and took his cock in his hand. As he leaned into her, pressing the round, full head of his rod between her cunt lips Marie moaned deeply and pushed her rear up in the air as if to push herself into his cock.
"Dave used one hand to hold her hip and the other to reach under and massage her tits. They rocked and swayed, Dave pounding into her with alarming force, Marie twisting her ass around in a circle and out towards him in little burst of energy to match his rhythm. His ass popped into her again and again in the most thrilling way.
"I could imagine so clearly what each of them must be feeling. You could see the passion in their faces. You wouldn't have recognized them they were so contorted and strained. It was getting uncomfortable for me to have my cock so tightly confined in the inadequate pouch of my pants. I had to pull it out and stroke it. It was aching with fullness and need. I don't suppose I'd ever been so aroused.
"When I was in school I used to masturbate with pictures of naked women torn from magazines guys smuggled into school. We all passed them around secretly. We also had playing cards with pictures of people fucking on the backs. Those were also pretty sure things. I realized as I watched Dave and Marie fucking so furiously that no picture could ever be as exciting as watching the real thing.
They kept up their rhythm for the longest time. When Marie started quivering and shaking and screaming though, they got even faster and it became jerky. I thought she was really going crazy or something. Later I realized she was just having a long, intense series of orgasms. Dave had this look of total involvement on his face. There was also some kind of light or satisfaction that played around his mouth as Marie convulsed and trembled. It must have been really exciting for him to see her come.
"Pretty soon they got tired of standing so they just fell down on the bed. Dave kept fucking away at her rear, but now he was using both hands to squeeze her nipples and knead her breasts. Marie was whimpering and moaning. Dave kept saying 'God I love your tight little cunt, come on baby, give me more, give it to me, come on baby!'
"Marie moaned and groaned even louder then. She said 'Fuck me harder, fuck me harder! Give me your whole big, hard cock! Shove it up my cunt as far as you can ram it in! Come on, give it to me!'
"I felt like I was doing it with them. My passion rose just as theirs did. I was beating my swollen, sore cock with a rapid flurry of soothing strokes.
"Then they shifted positions again. This time Dave sat on the edge of the bed with his legs spread wide. Marie sat down on the towering spike of his cock with a deep resounding sigh. She had her back to him and while she played with his pendulous balls and dug into his inner thighs with her long fingernails, Dave's hands played all over her tits and belly and her muff.
"It was amazing to me that he could hold out so long. I'm sure I would have come long before I'd gotten that far. Marie was coming and coming again and again, but Dave managed to hold out for what seemed like forever.
"Every time she would reach a peak, Marie's back would arch and her face would go all vacant and agonized as she dug down further into his body. Dave said, 'That's right baby, take all you can get! Suck my cock off with your tight little pussy.' Hearing him say that would seem to drive her into another peak and he would get even more excited from the passion he was igniting in her body.
"I longed for relief myself. It was like being assaulted with a tidal wave of sexual need to watch those two in action. I guess I felt empathy with Dave or something, imagining myself to be in his place, because I didn't shoot until I knew he was in the throes of his orgasm.
"Dave pressed both his strong hands hard on the tops of Marie's thighs, pressing her body down harder and harder on his cock. He must have gone all the way to the end of her canal. Maybe he even stretched it out further. I could see her eyes popping out as if she were being run through, but deliciously run through.
"He got a grim look of total concentration and determination on his face as he let his sex run free. He had been holding it in check all this time so that Marie would be totally satisfied. Now he pumped his hips up and hers down so quickly and roughly that they were a blur to me.
"Instinctively I stepped up the pace of my masturbation until it matched their speed. Dave and I came at the same instant. He got off his rhythm a little, jerking and thrashing slightly, and then suddenly he screamed and pulled her into him with all his force, rocking his body back and forth.
"Marie was totally overtaken by his need and it excited her so much that she had the biggest come ever just as he shot his searing load of thick, white cum-juice deep up her cunt channel.
"I gasped and moaned quietly as my cock jerked and quivered and then exploded in a gush of gism. Suddenly I realized how dangerous all this was. They could have turned to look out the window at any minute! There was no way I could explain a thing like that so I quickly ran away through the trees that surrounded the cottage.
"I was dripping in sweat and my heart was pounding as if to jump out of my chest by the time I reached the main house. I went straight up to my room and collapsed on the bed asleep.
"When I woke up it was dusk and everything was quiet. It was almost time for supper. As I washed my hands and changed clothes for dinner I wondered how I would feel around Marie after what I had just seen. It had all made me feel I'd never really known my sister.
"As it turned out it wasn't difficult at all. I discovered a latent talent for acting. We were perfectly natural with one another. That was how I got started Doctor.
Corey paused in his narrative. Finally I asked, "Got started in what?"
"In nudes, of course! You know I told you that I always loved to draw and paint. I had been painting these simple little landscapes and still-life's all along. That was all I ever attempted, except for a few portraits.
"Well, that night, after the first time I watched Marie and Dave and there were many more times after that-I laid awake all night thinking about her beautiful slender firm body. I must have jerked off seven or eight times. You know how it is when you're seventeen. After a while I decided to get up and draw her body.
"It was so exciting to draw a naked female form. It was the first time I had seen a real woman totally nude and it intrigued me and delighted me so that that was all I cared to draw or paint.
"I set up a studio for myself in a remote wing of the house and started bringing in models from an agency in the village. All day I did nothing but pose them and paint them in all attitudes and positions.
"I did many detailed studies of the female genitalia as well as full figure portraits. That has been my work for the past six years. I am now the top in my field in the art world.
"But I'm jumping ahead. Of course, I kept careful watch on my sister's comings and goings. When it looked like she was on her way to Dave's cottage, I followed stealthily on foot. I was never detected.
"After a while I began observing the quarters of the other servants. I discovered some very exciting activities right there on the grounds of Four Winds.
"One day I was checking through an old storeroom in the vast garage behind the main house. I thought I had left some canvas stretchers there a few months back. It was a dim and dusty room and after looking unsuccessfully through all the cupboards and shelves for the stretchers, I decided to just sit down and think. Often I find that it's easier to locate something after a little thought I settled down into the silence of the storeroom to ponder the problem.
"But I didn't ever find those stretchers because I began to hear quiet but unmistakably sexual cries coming from somewhere close at hand. My ears perked up right away. There's nothing I loved better than to watch people fucking.
"Finally I was able to trace the sounds to the apartment over the garage where our cook, Melissa and our chambermaid Dee live together. Both of them are very young, attractive women. I had done several portraits of each. I was fascinated. Did they have men up there with them?
"It was very precarious, but finally I found a little room for myself outside one of the windows of the apartment. My position was awkward but I was able to see clearly into the large room where they slept.
"To my surprise, there were no men in the room. The sex was all taking place between Melissa and Dee. They were lying on the bed cradled in each other's arms, stroking and touching. Melissa was lying more or less on top of Dee, grinding her pussy into Dee's bush. Both of them were stark naked, displaying the full charms I had painted so often.
"They were kissing deeply, their tongues trashing and thrusting deep into one another's mouth. Melissa quit her pumping motion, sliding off Dee's body. She thrust her hand in between the hairy cunt lips, spreading them apart with her fingers.
Her ringers played lightly over Dee's clit, teasing it into erection and tension. Dee tossed and groaned on the bed under Melissa's delicate erotic caresses. She pulled away from Melissa's probing kiss and fastened her mouth tightly on Melissa's beautiful tits, sucking hard and greedily.
"Dee grabbed hold of Melissa's buttocks with both hands and rolled the two globes of flesh together and spread them apart so that I could see the long gash of Melissa's cunt. It was bright red like a fresh wound and fringed in curly red hair.
"Melissa had shaved most of her cunt hair off, leaving only a narrow fringe around the edge of her lips. It was beautiful. I had never seen anything like it. Apparently she did it only recently.
"I could see the exact shape of her long tapering cunt lips and her goodies inside were casually exposed by the baldness of the lips Dee began to move down toward the juicy hole, releasing Melissa's tits with a pop and a slurp. She fastened her hungry mouth over the lips and sucked Melissa's cunt flesh into her mouth while she thrust out with her tongue in motions that made Melissa groan and beg for relief.
"Dee nibbled on Melissa's cunt and clit teasingly, rubbing the lips with her fingers and spreading them far apart so I could see just how delectable Melissa's meat looked when it was aroused.
"Of course, I had never fucked Melissa, but at that moment I resolved to do so. I had never really fucked any woman, except in rare fantasies. It was much more interesting to watch others fuck.
"Dee was definitely the dominant partner in the session I watched. She sucked long and hard at Melissa's cunt, but she was mean about it. As soon as Melissa got ready to come, Dee would shift her position and her sucking motions to another sensitive area, frustrating Melissa's impending release.
"I guess she wanted to see Melissa reduced to a total wretch of need and desire.
"I was getting very aroused. My cock was straining out of my waistband and still getting thicker and longer and harder. It was driving me crazy because if I reached down to relieve the agonizing tension in my crotch I would lose my grasp on the window sash and go tumbling down the roof. All I could do was to share Melissa's frustration at Dee's teasing work.
"Finally Melissa was screaming and begging, grabbing Dee's head roughly and pulling her down, trying to force her to stay on her clit. Dee had got Melissa turned on to her human limits.
"Then Dee pulled out a vibrator and thrust it all the way up Melissa's gaping dripping cunt. Melissa shrieked. That was the last thing she was expecting. Dee worked it in and out of her rapidly while she sucked away at Melissa's tits.
"All the tension that had been building up in Melissa's body was discharged in a giant, total, intense, almost frightening orgasm. She moaned deeply and pulled Dee's hands into her cunt to drive the vibrator all the way up her deep channel of heat.
"Dee got pretty excited too. After Melissa finished and there was a dribble of come pouring in a small steady stream from her cunt lips Melissa pulled out the vibrator and quickly thrust it up Dee's ass before Dee knew what hit her.
"Then she fastened her mouth at Dee's cum and sucked furiously at all the folds and recesses of the scarlet gash. Dee carried on with the same intensity that Melissa had shown when she was being vibrated and sucked violently.
"My cock was bursting out of my pants by this time. There was nothing I could do without leaving the scene in the window. Either alternative was totally frustrating to me.
"I was totally absorbed in what I saw. I almost fell off the ledge though, when I heard my sister right behind me. She was leaning out a window in the main house.
" Corey! Are you nuts or something? Get out of that window before you kill yourself! You crazy idiot!'
"I almost had a heart attack, Doctor. It was very difficult to explain to my sister what I'd been doing. She already knew, in a way.
"That was last week. Ever since then all she wants to talk to me about is sex. She wants to know why I don't have a girlfriend, why I paint only nudes, why I'm not attracted to anyone. I finally came here at her insistence."
CONCLUSION
^
Corey didn't know it at the time of his first interview, but what he was really trying to do in all his painting of nudes and his spying on lovers was to work up the nerve to take his sister to bed. As a lonely young schoolboy, Corey longed for the loving attention of his only living family, his sister.
When he finally got out of school and came home to her, he realized sadly that he was hopelessly inadequate to the job of seducing such an experienced young woman.
After a couple of sessions in my office, Corey realized that all his watching and spying were only substitutions for the real thing. Soon Corey discovered that his sister had always shared his love. Even Dave was willing to make room in their relationship for Corey. Since Dave's prime enjoyment came from seeing Marie totally transported by sexual stimulation, he came to enjoy watching Corey and Marie almost as much as Corey enjoyed watching Dave and Marie. Of course, the situation was satisfactory to Marie.
Corey also expanded his sexual activity to include Melissa first and later Dee as well.
Corey's growth in the sexual sphere also led to growth in his work as an artist. He expanded his work beyond the limitation of nudes.
It was a pleasure treating Corey, brief though our association was. All he needed to get him on the right track was a little suggestion and help from his sister.
CASE HISTORY NINE
^
Subject: Adele C. Age: Nineteen
INTERVIEW ONE
The case of Adele is one that is most interesting. She came to me of her own free will and I found her to be most interesting and very informative in the experiences she related to me.
She was an adopted child and had never known her real parents. She was taken into the home of a very wealthy couple and was raised as their own.
This" could be a motive for the kind of life she lives but I doubt it. Children of wealthy parents do not always lead the life style that she does, despite the fact that most people chose to believe so.
Here then is the transcript of her tape.
Well, doctor, I guess your work is to find out all the nitty gritty details of people's sex lives. I don't mind telling you. I tell everybody else, so I might as well tell you also.
I started balling when I was about fourteen. We had this Latin porter living in the house. He became my first lover. I remember the way it happened.
It was on a Sunday, the day my adopted parents usually go away somewhere. I have a feeling they do one of those swapping things with their friends, but I can't be sure.
Anyway, Ramon and I were alone in the house. I had been feeling kind of horny for weeks now and there was nobody around to do anything with.
Before that time I had been petting a lot with some of the lame kids that my parents introduced me to.
But this was the first time that I really felt like I needed it. Sex, I mean.
So I sat out on the back lawn, sipping some soda or something and I watched him go about his chores, cleaning the garden and putting tools away in the shed.
I was wearing a very sheer top and a skirt with no panties on underneath.
My legs were stretched out on the chaise lounge and once in awhile, just to tease him, I would part them and give him a peek at my cunt. It wasn't all that hairy yet, but I knew that just the sight of it would turn him on.
And he sure as hell noticed it right away.
I could see the look in his eyes every time he stooped down to do something. He was sweaty and hot from the sun and his work, and that somehow appealed to me a lot.
This went on for about a half hour, and then he finally came over to me to ask some question or other. It was an excuse and we both knew it.
He kept looking down at my crotch, his eyes trying to bore right into my flesh. I felt a little jump in my heart every time he did that.
He was a dark complexioned man, actually still a boy; no older than twenty-two or so.
His face was sweaty and shiny, and his rough hewn limbs were supple and strong.
He excited me as no other person could have done at the time. The contrast between him and the rest of the people I had been used to was rather striking, and I think that was the reason I was so attracted to him.
"Would the lady like anything further?" he asked very politely.
I decided to tease him.
I slipped off one of my sandals and threw it at the foot of the lounge.
I made sure to give him a good peek at my thighs when I did that, letting the skirt roll all the way up almost to my cunt.
His eyes almost bugged out three feet from his face.
He bent down and smilingly he picked up the sandal and gave it back to me.
I took it from him and again I threw it on the ground.
"The lady wishes to play the game," he stated flatly.
He smiled his bright smile at me, and I almost collapsed under the glaze of it.
Then I stood up and walked slowly towards the house. I looked back once and he stood in the center of the garden looking at me, his hands on his hips and that smile still on his face.
I knew he would follow me and I settled myself on the couch inside, waiting for him.
He came in minutes after and walked right to me. I sat immobile on the divan and smiled, waiting to see what he would do.
"You are very pretty, lady. I think you need a man today. No?"
"Maybe," I said.
"Yes. I think maybe you do."
Then he reached out slowly to me and lifted the hem of my skirt. I could feel his hands on me, rough and coarse. But they felt better than anything I had ever known.
His rough claws scraped the soft flesh of my inner thighs, leaving red marks, but I spread them willingly, wanting to feel his hands some more.
"Pretty little lady. You like the fucking, yes?" he said to me. "Yes, Ramon. I like."
Then he lifted my legs and spread them, exposing my cunt to his gaze and baring me for what he wanted to do next.
He kneeled down before me on the floor and pulled the skirt clear above my waist, exposing my cunt and my full, young thighs.
"Very nice," he hissed. "Nice pussy."
His words inflamed me. I wanted to melt right there before him and have him take me.
Then he did something that surprised the hell out of me. He thrust his head between my thighs and started sucking and slurping at my cunt. His mouth was as rough as his hands as he licked at the clit and spread the cunt lips with his hands.
He started in on me like a machine and I almost died.
"Ramon, you're incredible," I gasped.
I felt his stubble along the inside of my thigh, scraping and rubbing me and exciting me as I had never been before.
His fingers began playing with the cunt lips, pulling them apart and teasing the clit above them. I was pulsating and hot by this time, my blond hair cascading over my face and my body hot and flush with excitement and pleasure.
I knew now that he was what I wanted, what I needed more than anything my parents could give me.
"Here little one," he said. "Smoke this. It makes you feel nice."
He pulled out a long, skinny cigarette from his shirt pocket and gave it to me. I didn't know what it was but I would have done anything as long as he didn't stop doing what he was doing to my cunt.
He lit the thing and took a big puff, almost smoking the thing half way through.
I took a puff then and spread my legs to have him suck me more.
"No. Finish it first. Then I suck you nice, little lady."
I did as he asked. I would have done anything to have him continue his sucking.
When the joint was finished, he resumed his delicious task.
He spread my thighs, almost to my chest now, and began in earnest, sucking and slurping like a man.
My cunt was drooling sticky fluids but he seemed to love them, sucking them in and making me watch all that he did.
"Look, little one. I'm sucking you. I know you like it."
By that time, the dope was working in my system. I pushed his head in farther with my hands and begged silently for more of that delicious sucking.
His tongue was darting in and out of my cunt, filling my hole with the velvet sensation that whipped me into a lather of excitement.
He pushed his hands under me and raised me up by my ass, bringing my cunt to bear on his mouth more firmly and more securely.
His fingers dug into the back of my thighs and my ass, and he even slipped one of his fingers into my asshole, eliciting a loud moan of pleasure from my overheating and super-excited body.
His dark skin, contrasting with the milky whiteness of my thighs, was a sight that thrilled me as nothing since has ever been able to do.
He licked and sucked harder, thrusting his whole mouth sometimes into my gaping cunt.
I felt the pressure mount and increase inside me as his tongue played marvelous games with my pussy.
I could see that he was doing something with his hands now, unbuckling his pants and slipping them off. I could hardly wait. I knew he would have a huge, dark cock-just what I wanted now.
As he sucked me, I could see him stroking his cock; only the head of it, huge and red, was visible from his tightly clenched fist.
He was getting it hard and ready for me and I could hardly wait to taste that thing. I wanted it in my mouth and also in my cunt, and I was sure that he was going to give it to me now.
"Now I show you something, lady. Something nice."
He stood quickly, wrenching his mouth away from my cunt and kneeling on the cough above me with his thick love pole dangling before my eyes. I was shocked and pleased at the same time, almost blinded to anything else in the world now except that cock in front of me.
I gasped with pleasure and then noticed him taking his cock in his hand and pushing it to me, telling me to open my mouth.
I didn't need to be told twice. I opened my virgin mouth to his husky tool and allowed him to put it in.
It was the most sensational thrill I had ever received. The taste and the texture of it in there was something that I had never felt, and I knew that I would want it forever after that.
He slid it in and began pulling in and out of me.
The smell of his cock and his balls was like an aphrodisiac to my blazing desire.
I noticed his body responding to my mouth now as I sucked on the head the way he told me to do. I licked the huge head and the under part of it, making sure to touch the sensitive nerves and the delicate membranes around the ridge of the cock head.
He was moaning and groaning, speaking alien to me but exciting nonetheless.
I found him sighing and caressing my head and my chin, making me milk his cock with that slurping, sucking mouth of mine.
But I was not completely satisfied yet. I still wanted him to play with my cunt, still needed to feel something firm and solid in there or at least his mouth on me down there.
"Ramon, please touch my cunt. Play with me."
He hardly heard. His head, as I knew mine was, was swimming now, as the effect of the drug and the sexual excitement was brought to a fever pitch in both our bodies.
"Not yet, my little lady. Not yet," he hissed.
I leaned down further and took one of his balls in my mouth, rubbing the shaft of the cock against my cheek and face.
The smell of him below the cock was heady and rich, rank animal smell that I learned to love as soon as it hit me.
I grabbed him around the thighs, seeking to pull him closer to me, wanting him inside me, permeating my very essence.
He was a pillar of darkness, full of brute animal strength and infinite tenderness as well.
The combination of tenderness and brute force, both coinciding in one man at the same time, is a rare thing I later discovered, and I was not able to fully appreciate that the first time around.
After what seemed like a long time to me, Ramon slipped from me and positioned himself above me, after pushing me on my back.
He spread my legs again and settled himself above me, prodding that cock of his into the soft, tender flesh of my inflamed pussy.
I could feel the heat of his cock as he tried to make his way into me, and I bucked up at him to receive the full thrust of his penetration.
I wanted him. I didn't care what the consequences of my actions were. There was no thought in my mind of getting pregnant and even if I did I would have gone through with it anyway.
His mouth was crushing my tits, licking at the nipples and teasing the dark flesh with his teeth and lips.
Ramon slowly inserted his cock in me, parting the folds of skin and penetrating a little at a time into my flaming pussy hole.
As soon as I felt that huge head slip into my cunt I violently bucked up, forcefully ramming his cock deep into my pussy.
"Slow, little lady. You must be patient."
He was so sweet, so understanding, but I needed his cock badly. I was on fire and the only way to quench the flames of passion that licked at me was to have that cock inside me, ramming and tearing me apart.
I bucked harder, gorging myself on the delicious feelings and sensations he was producing in me.
"Fuck me, you stud. Oh, yes. Fuck!"
He smiled, relishing the effect his cock was having on me and no doubt winning some sort of victory over me, satisfying his ego, I assumed, as well.
I didn't care. I didn't care whether he thought this a victory or anything like that. All I cared about was having this animal of a man inside me, tearing at the flesh and bringing me to the fever pitch of pleasure.
I gave in willingly, opening my cunt and flexing the pussy muscles to make it as tight and as hot for him as I could. I learned a lot that day.
My cunt raked and milked his cock, tightening around the head of it as he pulled away and then forcing his skin back with the lips as he pushed in.
The smell of our bodies was filling my nose as I felt his tool ram all the way to the cervix.
We rolled off the couch somehow, landing on the floor still connected by our genitals, completely lost in his flesh and he in mine.
The room seemed to spin around me, whirling me about like a leaf in a storm and making me all but incomprehensible to anything that was going on around me.
"Ramon, Ramon, you doll. Fuck me!"
I was lost in this delicious world where nothing existed but the reality of our genitals intertwined and flaming with passion.
I gave in to it, many times satisfying him.
I knew that he came a few times before I did. His come would stream into me, spurt after delicious spurt, and flood my insides with his thick cream.
The stuff dribbled out of me, coursing down my thighs and ass, but he never stopped. Not once did he relent in his insatiable desire to please me, too, and satisfy me before he finished.
His cock never lost its rigidity, never once broke the insane pace he had begun.
But I wondered why I wasn't coming. I assumed it was because this was my first time at real fucking.
I was not to be cheated though. I wanted to come and was determined to have Ramon be the one that would first make me come from real fucking.
I positioned my cunt in such a way as to be able to rake my clit across the bottom of his solid cock every time he stroked in and out of me.
I immediately found results. The friction of his cock rubbing against my inflamed and blood gorged clit brought me to the point of orgasm almost immediately.
I felt the tingling pleasure of it begin deep inside me, then extend to all my extremities and make my blood almost boil.
I loved that sensation, worked hard at keeping it and increasing it, wanting to have the finality of orgasm break over me.
"Harder, Ramon, baby. Harder," I screamed into his ear.
He increased the tempo of his thrusts, rubbing my clit with his cock and thrilling me as I have never been thrilled since.
Perhaps it was the novelty of it or the thrill of fucking the porter or something. But what ever it was, it was certainly the most memorable fuck I had ever had.
Finally, the orgasm ripped through me, making me want to wrench my cunt out, making me feel like an explosion had been set off in my pussy.
I clung tightly to him, needing him close to me more than ever and then finally breathing a sigh of relief as the bittersweet sensations coursed their way out of my body and made me settle to a quieter, almost blissful, state of being.
Ramon and I fucked a few times after that, none of the times of course being as exciting or thrilling as that first time. They were nevertheless completely satisfying to me, as well as to him.
He quit working for us a few months later because he had enrolled in college and had become a student.
I wrote him a few letters, but when I realized that he wanted the relationship to continue into something deeper and long lasting, I decided that it had better stop right then and there.
There was no way that the two of us could have gotten together like that.
I'm not sure if I hurt him or not, but there was really nothing I could do about it. Can you imagine? Telling my parents that I was going with the porter?
They would have disowned me, for sure.
After that, though, I developed a keen taste for the joy of sex. I wanted it now, and found that I needed it as a steady diet. The same was true of the marijuana he and I had smoked during each sexual encounter.
I became what other people might call a hippy. That term of course is all but antiquated.
Nobody is a hippy any more, if they ever were.
After that, I would sleep around with anybody that I found attractive. I saw nothing wrong with it and in discussions with my parents, the truth came out and they were stunned.
But I told them straight out that they could not stop me, so the best thing to do was to go on the pill and have their blessing.
They were pretty shaken up, but I faced them with the fact that they swapped and grouped with their friends.
They were embarrassed as all hell but finally realized that even at the age of fourteen I was every bit as much their sexual equal.
I flew from one affair to another, and even took up with some of my father's friends. I knew that sounds perverted or something, but they were overjoyed to have a little chippy like me sucking on their cocks and giving them some things that even their wives would never dream of doing.
Like playing with dildoes and talking dirty in their ears while we fucked.
Those were little tricks I picked up from Ramon and the other people I fucked.
I learned a lot, and in a few months I had more people begging me to fuck them than I knew what to do with.
As far as I'm concerned, I have no problem in my sex life. The problem seems to lie with other people's attitudes as to what I should be doing and not be doing. Can you imagine that, doc? People telling each other what to do and what not to do?
I think it's abominable.
By the time I was seventeen, I had slept with at least three other women as well.
You see, I had gotten involved with a feminist group and some of the women there were dykes.
They sort of turned me on to lesbian love.
Now I find women every bit as exciting as men. Some of them even better than me. I especially like the use of dildoes with other women.
It's such an intimate and gentle thing to make love to a woman, much more so than a man.
A man has the tendency to rush things, seeks his own pleasure first and leaves the female in the sexual dust.
Women, however, are much more understanding than men. They know how to take care of the other person first and really know where to touch, to suck and they produce the ultimate in pleasure in each other.
From experience, I know this to be true. I knew that women can be infinitely gentler and much more stimulating than the average man.
That is the main reason I fuck women.
I know that I'm selfish in many ways when it comes to sex. I can never seem to get enough of it in my life, never seem to find enough love from one person that will make me want to stay with them for good.
That isn't really a problem. People have more severe problems than that all the time. Mine is minor when compared to theirs.
But I find that I am relatively happy without the reassurance of a steady lover.
I feel that people are destined somehow to meet the right person at the right time. I really do want a steady boyfriend, someone to love me alone. But I also feel that in many ways I am not ready for it, not ready to face the full responsibility of that option.
Perhaps soon. Perhaps never.
Whatever happens will be right, though.
It will happen when the time is right.
Some people have called a lot of names, saying that I'm a spoiled little girl who doesn't' know what she wants out of life. Others have said that I'm a total sexual deviate, not being able to live without that constant satisfaction only sex can bring. None of them are true.
I admit openly that I am basically lonely. I need to have reassurance more than sexual satisfaction. The problem is that most people cannot give that alone without the sexual part coming into play.
I tak that along with it too.
I know that a lot of men take advantage of it, they see the need somehow and satisfy it.
But the problem is that after they are through, when their libidos are satiated they leave in the same condition they found me in.
It can be very trying.
Women however are more interesting.
They seem to relate to that better than men can because I still believe that we are gentler and more understanding of each other's needs.
At this point in my life I feel that nothing can be done until I settle with myself who I am and what I want out of life.
That much is certain.
Also that only come with age and maturity and these are two qualities I still lack.
I feel unformed and still half grown despite the fact that I have had sexual experiences rivaling those of some women twice my age.
In this isolated state of being I feel fragile, delicate and at the mercy of the winds of fate that blow for me.
There is yet much work to be done. I know that it all has to be started from my end of it and not from some outside source.
But I feel, with a little help from you, Doctor, and some well meaning people that I can make it.
You will help me a little, won't you?
I feel that I can trust you, can confide in you and you won't look down or demean me.
I know that I have done some things that deserve some sort of chiding, but I feel that they were done out of ignorance and a terrible need to be loved.
That's all really.
There was never any evil intent on my part and I knew that to be a fact.
I'm sure that you, of all people, should understand that.
That's why I'm asking for your help.
I watched her bewildered face. She truly needed some kind of counsel. My hope was that we could reach peace of mind.
CONCLUSION
^
I feel that this young lady, in an effort to make up for her feelings of being left behind by her natural parents and ignored by her adopted parents, went on a desperate search for love.
She misunderstood sexual love for the real love that transpires between people.
Her efforts proved to be futile, but the lessons she learned helped put her life in proper perspective.
This is a good example of a patient becoming her own analyst.
She has found the root of her problem, loneliness, and has come to terms with it in her own way, deciding that she is as yet still immature and not ready for the responsibility of a mature relationship.
I asked her to visit me later merely as a follow-up interview, and was pleasantly surprised to discover that she had found someone she could love and would return her love in its full dimensions.
How many parents have made the mistake of being too watchful over their children, of restricting their natural urges and, therefore, unleashing a dangerous rebellion, a dangerous desire to learn more of the forbidden.
The people who talked to me and who make up the contents of this book have all resolved their conflicts of the sexual nature. Some of them did it easier than others, some of them needed long term therapy and a greater search into themselves instead of into the sex lives of strangers.
How much of this could have been avoided if only these children's parents had given them the understanding and the guidance that they needed. If only they had allowed them to develop their healthy attitudes toward sex without bending them into perversion.
I sincerely hope that the world is changing, that new attitudes towards sex are developing, that these children when they become parents will not make the same mistakes that were made over them.
