This is the story of a girl named Savvy. If it shocks, it is because to even the casual observer, the new sexual revolt that is raging throughout the land, carries shock waves. Particularly when one reads police ledgers and psychiatric reports, social workers' casebooks, sociologists' and doctors' reports and conclusions.
Although Savvy's environment is not one of her making, she is not averse to taking advantage of every tiny crack in the crumbling "establishment." Nor are millions of other teenagers, male and female.
She is a composite of millions of children - for she is a child in years, though not in the ways of the hundreds of things which "turn-on" this generation of youngsters, such as speedy cars, wild, psychedelic experiences, marijuana, LSD, and promiscuous sex with both boys and girls.
Because of her broad, but not unusual experiences, she is called "Savvy." There is literally no stimulation of the mind or body, no fulfillment of a desire she has felt, that Savvy has denied herself. She knows every sex trick in the book, but she is only typical of millions who can match, and in some instances, outstrip her in degradation and perversion.
Savvy knows no rules. She has no respect for the laws of the church, of the land, of society at large; nor does she have a moral code of her own. She therefore knows no guilt feelings, as we shall see.
She is not a neglected child of the slums. She comes from a middle-class family who are no more aware of what Savvy is really like underneath her cute, mini-skirted exterior, than they are of thousands of her counterparts who live in all parts of the country.
The facts of the surging revolt of our teenage children are plain, but most choose to hide their heads in the sand and ignore them. A talk with police, with child psychologists, with student counselors, teachers, doctors, sociologists, will substantiate the facts as to what is happening - not in isolated instances, but to an alarming degree.
Venereal disease among the juvenile population is now approaching epidemic proportions. Experts state that it is not just a lack of sex education, or poor knowledge of how to use mechanical means such as condoms to prevent disease, but an outright refusal on the part of youngsters to use anything which might synthesize or detract from sexual pleasures. And, importantly, many young females refuse to take any precautions against pregnancy!
The latest figures available, from the year 1965, show that one of every eight girls who are married are pregnant at the time. And the rate of unmarried mothers has climbed a startling 40 per cent since the second world war. Significantly, the average age of the unwed mother now stands at 17, whereas, until recent years, the average was 21!
Surveys such as the Kinsey Reports show that over 80 per cent of all girls are non-virgins when married, and that among lower grade levels, more than 60 per cent of all females admit to sex relations before age 16.
At least 20 per cent of all females between the ages of 14 and 26 are estimated to have indulged in some form of Lesbian sex; while the homosexual societies themselves claim that a whopping 27 per cent of all young males have indulged in homosexual activities. They further boast that of that number, over 80 per cent have become overt and confirmed homosexuals.
In the cases of young girls engaging in sex, more than half state that their first experience, or the majority of their sex experiences have been with males of from 35 to 50 years of age. From this same number, about 30 per cent admit that they were the instigators or aggressors in the sex situation!
Sociologists and psychiatrists, as well as police and other experts closely involved with juveniles, have concluded that there are a number of contributing factors to the rise of juvenile sex delinquency. However, most are in agreement that two or three major factors are most responsible.
First, the breakdown of the moral structure of the home. This involves the high percentage of unsupervised youngsters who are left practically to their own devices, because of both parents working. This not only diminishes the amount of sex education they may get, no matter how restrictive or actually wrong, but it puts the child in the position of having to experiment with sex, since little or no sex education is given in schools. Religion teaches sex in one word: "Don't," and today's children will not accept an unexplained or irrational forbiddance of anything.
Another important element of the junior sex revolt is the conduct of the adults. Newspapers and magazines blare the sordid stories of sex orgies, wife-swapping, call girl and mistress activities; children are actually taught to cheat and lie by conniving, loose-moraled parents. As a classic but simple example, how often does a youngster answer the telephone, only to have a parent whisper: "Tell him I'm out." How many children are taught not to cheat at school, yet are knowing witnesses to parents who cheat in business deals or on income tax forms. The idea projected by the legendary bandit of Sherwood Forest, Robin Hood, of "stealing from the rich," is instilled into the child of today by parents who feel and preach that "big business and the little guy are mortal, natural enemies, so if you can gouge him - go ahead." Most children are victims of the 11th commandment: "Thou shalt not get caught."
Children are natural mimics, and, looking at the actions and morals of their parents and older brothers and sisters of college age, they have strong reasons to scoff at anyone who preaches old-fashioned honesty, integrity, and fidelity as being "square."
Many experts see part of the answer in the "urban explosion." That is, where once families were isolated and revolutionary ideas spread very slowly if at all, the center of the community was the home, the church, and the school, which was always staffed by trusted members of the local community. With the mass movement of families to urban areas, there is no focal point for local activities that has proven effective in diverting young people's energies to constructive activities.
And part of the urban explosion involves the "mobility" of the modem youth. It is estimated that at least 20 million teenagers today have access to an automobile without the involvement of an adult, either as the driver, or as passenger. This, in effect, accomplishes a lot of things. It provides the teenager with the thrill of speed; it makes personal contacts within a short time possible; it permits isolation for purposes of "necking" and total sex participation. Moreover, it provides the average teenager with a private "bedroom" on wheels. It also makes possible the attendance of such events as "beach parties," sex orgies, hippie "love-ins" and "sleep-ins," that would have previously been impossible.
In an affluent age, youngsters have more money than ever before. Nothing is beyond their purchasing power, from contraceptives and sex gimmicks, to speedballs, marijuana, flashy cars and clothes, to liquor and motels for a "quickie." .
No one factor is completely responsible, but authorities and psychiatrists place the majority of the "blame on careless and indifferent parents who are "too busy" with their own problems of economics and sex to give direction or even attention to their offspring. As one noted TV commentator put it: "The generation who raised their children in the permissiveness recommended by Dr. Spock and his kind, are now reaping a harvest that resembles the whirlwind!" The Chief of Police of a large western city recently said: "These parents seem willing to turn the rearing of their children over to other delinquent children, or to the harsh lessons of the law - and the kids know no law but that of selfish desire. Then, when the police must enforce the law, even to the point of actual combat with these animal-like children, we are accused of brutality. The real brutality, as I interpret the word, is in the utter abandonment of these children by parents, to the winds of chance and to an uncaring society."
There is a "rebellion factor" involved in the behavior of many youngsters. Inside themselves they instinctively seek and need discipline, and they resent and sometimes hate parents who do not provide it; or who try to substitute money and pampering and permissiveness for good old-fashioned discipline and guidance.
In order to "punish" or get even, many juveniles deliberately indulge in "mind blowing" acts which usually involve sex, since this is the one subject which parents are so vague about.
Yet psychiatrists tell us that the sex drive is secondary only to that of self-preservation, and sex exploration and curiosity is as natural as is pubic hair. Neglect and misunderstanding of this important element in the human makeup has led to a wider "generation gap" than is supposed. The kids are more "with it," today. They do not look upon sex with fear or religious awe. They approach it as it should be: a normal, healthy function of the human body which can bring ecstasy and fulfillment, or if abused and misused, degradation and pain.
Another seldom recognized phenomenon with definite bearing on the action of today's children is this: in 1865, the average age of maturity (including menstruation) in the female was 16.5 years. Today, a world-wide survey shows that the average female is a "complete woman" at age 13.2 years!
Maturing at this early age, the juices and urges of sex come on earlier and stronger, and today's youth will explore the sex jungles because they have grown up in an atmosphere which tells them to look out for themselves. Parents, society, the church, even the leniency of the law, says clearly: the fittest survive. Be number one and look out for number one.
If they turn their eyes to parents, they are met with ignorance, indifference, and Victorian rules of conduct that are so obsolete that even their grandparents could not observe them.
If they turn to society (and their world is a limited one of teachers, neighbors, and the law enforcement officers) they are met with the same ignorance and indifference. They live in a world where they are shunted from one to another; where the "institution" has replaced the home; where no one really has the answers because no one really understands the problem or takes time to explore its mazes.
In an effort to "find themselves" and to identify with someone, something - anything, they turn to liquor, to marijuana and to the so-called "mind-expanding" drugs. They seek a foundation, an anchor, a refuge - and they find none.
In the end, they have only one another: a case of the blind leading the blind. They stumble on, seeming to sink deeper and deeper into the quicksands of indifferent ignorance, and the salvation they seek grows ever more distant.
As the reader moves through the pathetic, often sordid life of the girl called Savvy, we feel sincerely that if he pauses and reflects soberly, he will find in Savvy someone that he may know.
-Jack Benjamin
CHAPTER ONE - "I Learned At Home"
"They tell me that masturbation doesn't hurt you, and that is a good thing, because I've had my share, with me doing it, and with a couple of others using the finger.
"I don't know exactly when I started; I think I was eight or nine when I first found out how much fun I could have all by myself. Sexually, I mean. I can remember that I came home from school one day, sick. The school had called home, but my mother wasn't there, so they had one of the teachers take me home. I was sick to my stomach and had vomited in class, so the school nurse sent me home.
"The teacher let me off in front of my house and I went in. The front door was open, but I didn't see anyone around. I thought my mother was shopping - she never worked - so I went to the bathroom. Then I heard laughing coming from her bedroom, and a man's voice. I could tell it wasn't my father's voice, so I sneaked up to the door and peeked in. She was on the bed, naked, and this man - I didn't know him at all - was on the bed with her. He was undressed too, and he was down between her legs, pushing his finger up inside her. She had her legs spread wide apart and she was gasping and giggling while he was finger-fucking her. I knew what that was, because a couple of boys at school had tried it on me. One boy called it 'playing stinkfinger,' but the other one called it finger-fucking.
"Then the man moved his body so that his bottom was up by my mother's face, and I could see his big cock for the first time. He took his finger out of her and spread the lips of her cunt with his fingers; then he stuck his tongue in, licking her lips and digging his fingers into her ass while he pulled her cunt up tight to his face. Then he straddled her face, and she took his cock in her hand and began to lick the tip of it and tickle it with her tongue, moving it up and down the long shaft of it.
"I began to feel funny between the legs - ticklish, sort of, and I put my hand down inside my panties and felt the lips of my own thing. I tried sticking a finger up inside it, and it felt good, so I kept on doing it. I guess I'd played with myself before a few times, but it had never felt like it did while I was watching that man licking my mother's cunt, and her taking his big cock deep into her mouth. I could tell by the noises they were making that they were sucking hard on each other's things, and I just played with myself, harder and faster.
"Pretty soon, they were jumping around and moaning, and then they stopped. They just laid there, and I got a little scared and I went back out of the house, pretending like I had never even been home. I waited for about an hour, until I saw the man leave, and then I went in. My mother acted real worried when I told her I'd been sent home sick, and she made me go to bed and she gave me some stomach medicine.
"While I was laying there in bed, I kept thinking about that man, putting his finger and then his tongue up inside my mother, and how she had squirmed and moaned like she really liked it. I tried to imagine what it would feel like to have a man do that to me, and I played with myself again until I had a real good feeling all over my stomach and cunt. I'd never seen that before. I remembered a couple of times when I'd watched dogs doing it in the street, and I got that funny feeling between my legs, but I hadn't tried playing with myself then.
"I guess I knew it was wrong for my mother to let another man do that to her, but I wouldn't tell my daddy, because he never did pay much attention to me. Sometimes I thought he didn't even like me, but he bought me nice clothes and lots of toys and a bike, so I guess he was all right. But I made up my mind that the next time Joey and Billy caught me after school like they had before, that I might let them play stinkfinger with me. My mother had liked it, and I bet that I would too. And I knew why they called it that, because I put my own finger inside me, then I took it out, and it did stink!
"Later on, I remembered that and I wondered how a man could put his tongue in a stinky hole like that and get his nose up so close that he could smell it. I didn't know anything then about hygiene or douches and deodorants, but I thought a lot about it after that.
"But, before Joey or Billy played stinkfinger with me, there was another boy. He was about 15 or 16 then, and sometimes when my mother and father would go out for the evening, they would take me over to his house. He had a little sister, about six, I think, and my mother and daddy would go out with his parents and he'd baby-sit. His sister used to have to go to bed by eight o'clock, but I usually stayed up until about nine-thirty, to watch TV.
"Ray used to want the big, comfortable chair that was in front of the TV, and sometimes I would sit on his lap and watch. This one night, I didn't like the movie much, and I began to think about that man and his finger inside my mother. I wondered if Ray's finger would feel good inside me. I guess I began to squirm - that's another way you can play with yourself, you know, but it isn't much good - by rubbing your legs around so that it makes the lips of your cunt brush each other. Anyhow. I could feel his pants begin to bulge, and I guessed that he was getting a big cock like that man had when Mommy sucked it and licked it.
"I remember wondering if Ray would want me to do that to him, and I got a little scared, but not much, because he was running his fingers up and down my legs, going higher all the time until he touched my panties. He left his hand there, and he ran a finger over the crack in my cunt -through my panties. I began to get that feeling again. I wanted him to do more, so I spread my legs and he ran his finger inside my pantie leg and began to put it up inside me. It felt as good as I had thought it would, and I scrunched down a little so he could put it in more.
"He kissed me on the cheek and said, kind of scared, 'You won't tell anybody, will you?' I said, 'No - I like it. Do it some more.' "He raised me up and slid my panties off. I spread my legs wider, and he put his middle finger way up inside me and moved it in and out, touching that little mound in the front. It felt so good I wanted to laugh. I could feel his cock getting bigger and harder, pushing into the crack of my ass, and I raised up a little and slid my hand underneath myself so I could feel it. I knew what it was, but I wanted to tease him, so I asked, 'What's that?' "He dug his finger deeper into my cunt and said, 'You know what it is, you little devil. Want me to take it out?' I told him that I wanted to see it and touch it, so he unzipped his pants and moved me over a little - still keeping his finger working inside me - and took it out. He held it in his hand and pulled the skin back, and the red, wet head of it came out.
"It excited me, and I reached out and took hold of it. He closed his hand over mine and slid it down a little, then he began an up and down motion. After a while, he let me do it, and he kept pushing his finger in and out of my cunt. After a while, I had that wild, good feeling all over me again, and just then, he knocked my hand away and grabbed his cock and pumped away like crazy.
"All of a sudden, he stiffened and raised up, and I saw some watery juice come spurting out of the hole in the end of his cock! He caught most of it in his other hand, and then wrapped his handkerchief around his cock. He went to the bathroom, and while he was gone, I played with myself a little, to see if it was as good as when Ray had done it. It wasn't, but if I remembered how he'd done it, looking down at his finger going in and out, all wet and sticky, it made it feel almost as good.
"I left my panties off, and when he came back, I had my finger up inside me, working to massage that knob, the way he had to make it feel so good. He stood there and looked at me, and I stopped.
"'Man,' he said, shaking his head and feeling the bulge still in his pants, 'if you were only about five years older - we'd have a ball.' "I asked him what he meant, and he said, 'You know.' I thought he meant fucking, but I wasn't sure. Then I wondered if he meant putting his thing in my mouth, and sticking his tongue in mine, like I'd seen. I asked him if he meant putting his mouth and tongue on my thing, and me taking his in my mouth, and he looked real scared for a minute. Then he walked over and knelt down in front of me. I had my legs spread, and he could see my cunt real plain. He kept staring down at it, and I knew he wanted to put his tongue in it.
"He said, 'Where'd you learn about that?' And I told him I'd seen a man and a woman do it -but I didn't tell him who it was. He was fooling with his zipper again, and he got his cock out in his hand, and it was getting hard and long again. He asked me, 'Would you do it?' I told him I'd like to try it, and when I said that, he got down real low between my legs and he began to lick the lips of my cunt.
"He began to stick his tongue in and out, rubbing my knob, and it felt even better than his finger had before. I raised up to get closer to his face, and he put his hands under my behind and pulled me in tight to his face. He was making the same moaning sounds that the man had when he did it to Mommy, and I felt like I was floating in the air. Then I got all warm and chilled, all at the same time, and I just wanted to shout and laugh, and do something like that for Ray!
"I pushed him away and stood up, and told him to sit down in the chair. When he did, I took his cock and played with it for a while like he'd showed me before. I liked to see the red, wet head of it come out from under the skin, and I touched the tip of it with my tongue.
"When I did, he went sort of wild. He grabbed my head and pushed my mouth down hard. I opened my lips and let his cock slip in as far as it could go. It started to gag me a little, so he released my head, but I kept on pushing it in and out of my mouth. I could feel it throb and jerk, and after a minute or two, just as my mouth muscles were getting tired, I felt that juice squirt into it. Ray just kept on shoving, and all I could think of was to swallow it. It tasted sort of salty, but it didn't gag me.
"Ray took his cock out of my mouth and grabbed me and began to kiss me. He acted scared, and begged me not to tell anyone what we'd done. As if I would have. It had been the most exciting thing that had ever happened to me, and I wanted it to happen some more.
"After that, he made me put my panties back on and stretch out on the couch with a blanket. When our parents came home, I pretended I was asleep, but I wasn't. I was too excited at this new thing that had happened to me. I could hardly wait to get into my own bed, and think about it while I played with myself. It wasn't as good when I did, but I just couldn't stop thinking how Ray's tongue had felt inside my cunt, especially when he pressed it hard against my knob.
"Ray and I did that a lot more times, but he never did put it into me. When I was 11, he almost did one night, but he got scared because he didn't have a 'safety,' and I had just begun to have my monthly periods. That may surprise a lot of people - a girl menstruating at age ten, but I did. I was only a month from 11, though. I've often wondered if all that tonguing and fingering and all had anything to do with my coming around so young.
"But Ray's mother was getting suspicious, and they didn't have him baby-sit anymore. Instead, they'd bring his little sister to our house, and my daddy hired an old woman to baby-sit. I sneaked off a few times to meet Ray, when I was 11, but he was still too scared. And one time, he told me to get lost, that I was 'jailbait,' and that besides, he was getting the real thing from two girls in high school. I got mad and told him to shut up, or I'd tell everybody about us, and after that, I didn't see him much.
"I guess I would have been going after the real thing - real fucking, if it hadn't been for Moira. We became good buddies in junior high, and she showed me a whole new set of ways to masturbate, with a lot of things besides our fingers.
"Moira was a kook - at least, that's what most of the kids thought - especially the girls. The boys wouldn't even notice her. She had no breasts, she was skinny, homely as she could be, and she wore thick, bottle-bottom glasses that made her look like a toad wearing a dress. But I found out one thing: she was lonely, she was hot to trot, and she was ready to go!
"I found out one night after school when we both had to stay. I never was too bright in school - especially in mathematics - and the math teacher had kept us both. He was a bastard. He seemed to just get his kicks humiliating somebody - in class and out. And all the bastard did was to walk around us, at our desks, and make smart cracks about how homely and skinny and dumb Moira was.
"I know now what he was doing - playing the dumb against the sexy - the one he wanted to get, against the one he wouldn't know what the hell to do with. But I didn't know it then, and all I got was embarrassed. Every time Moira would try to ask a question, he'd say something like: 'How can you be so stupid? Why don't you spend more time with a girl like Savvy, instead of those skinny, cold, stupid girls like Jean, Marsha and Carol - the 'Sunday School bunch.' "Like I said, I can see now what he was doing, out then, I just thought he was mean. If he thought he was making points with me, he was nuts. I hated his guts! The more he picked on Moira, the more I felt sorry for her and close to her. I ended up just wanting to spit in his face, and put my arms around her and help her.
"So, I walked home with her - not before old fat-face had had a good pinch of my ass, and a try at squeezing my titties, but I fluffed him off. When we got to her place, she had brightened up a lot. I guess I was the first one in school that had spent more than three minutes with her without scratching away at her homeliness and her dumbness. Oh, she was dumb - in school, anyhow; but, boy, did she know some things that I didn't know.
"Both her parents worked and didn't get home for at least two hours after we were out of school. I went in with her, and we yakked away about what a no-good creep that teacher was, when all at once Moira surprised me by saying: 'I think he's a cocksucker!' "I hadn't thought about him that way before, but it struck me funny, and I laughed. She started laughing too, and she was at the refrigerator, trying to scrounge up something to eat. She grabbed a hot dog and waved it at me, laughing her head off. 'I bet his cock isn't as big as this!' she laughed.
"And all at once, we stopped laughing. We just looked at each other. I guess it was a full minute that we just stared. Then she said, looking a little guilty: 'You ever try one of these?' At first, I didn't really realize what she was saying. It had never dawned on me to try anything else in my cunt except my finger, or somebody else's finger. Oh, I'd thought about the real thing - fucking - but it was like a dream that would happen to me one day, it was just imagination. But when she waved that damned hot dog at me, I remembered how Ray's cock had looked: wet, slimy, slippery, long, hard - and I suddenly wondered why a hot dog wouldn't be like a man's prick.
"But I just played dumb and shook my head. Moira snickered and said, 'Wanna try it?' By that time, I was getting more than curious: I was getting horny. I wanted to try it, and at the same time, I was thinking of a dozen other things around the house that might work just as well inside my cunt.
"I didn't want to be 'chicken,' so I said as breezily as I could: 'Why not?' "She said, 'Here?' And I said, 'No, let's go into your room.' So we did. We went into her bedroom, and we were both sort of awkward - bashful, neither of us wanting to start first, so I told her, 'You show me how. I've never tried anything like that.' Moira grinned like a cat and got in her licks. 'I bet you've tried lots better.' "I just smiled and said that maybe I had, and let it lay. So, she took off her blouse and skirt and her slip - she didn't wear any bra - she didn't have to, and then she slipped off her panties. She was real skinny, but she had a fat pussy. I mean, the lips were puffed out, but I could see that little knob just peeking out between those fat lips.
"She didn't have much hair around her cunt - not as much as I did, anyhow, but she laid down in the bed with the hot dog in her hand and she opened up the lips of her cunt with one hand, and inserted the hot dog in her cunt with the other. She didn't look at me while she was pushing it in, but I knew why. She was staring up at the ceiling, her eyes kind of glassy, and I knew that she was dreaming about something, the same as I dreamed about Ray, or that guy with my mother.
"I watched her closely - not so much her expression as what she was doing. She must have used a hot dog before, because she was careful not to break it, and when she had about two inches of it inside her cunt, she put one finger around it to stiffen it, and keep it from bending. Then she began to really jam it in and out. She began to pant and moan.
"I could tell by the glaze forming in her eyes that she was really 'gone' in her fantasy, and I concentrated on watching how she was using the artificial cock. I was getting pretty hot and I wondered vaguely if Moira was one of the 'gay' girls I'd heard some mumbling about at school. She sure didn't act like it right then, shoving that hot dog in and out of her wide open pussy, but on the other hand, it didn't seem to bother her to let me look at her doing it, or to stare at her cunt.
"Then she began to do it faster, and she began to moan a little, saying, 'Oh, Chuck - oh, oh, Chuckie.' She came in little, quick jerks, and then she lay there, easing off the frank-fuck little by little. At last, she looked over and grinned. She took her hand off the hot dog, but she let it stick out of her cunt. At first I wanted to laugh, but the look on her face told me I hadn't better knock it until I'd tried it.
"She smiled and said, 'Want me to do it to get you started?' That sounded groovy, so I walked over and laid down beside her. She took the hot dog out of her and ran back to the refrigerator and came back with two of them! 'Let's do it together,' Moira suggested. I didn't see anything wrong with that, so I let her lay down with her pussy up where I could reach it. She handed me the hot dog she had used - I could tell because it wasn't icy cold, and I thought I could smell some of her pussy juices on it.
"We both laid on our sides and faced each other's cunt. She put her leg up so her pussy was open, and I did the same. Moira got a little carried away at the sight of my cunt, and began to rub the lips of it with her fingers, and then she put one finger in and massaged my knob. I thought she was going to use her tongue on me, and I wasn't sure I wouldn't have liked that, but she didn't. When I began to squirm, and tried to shove the hot dog into her, like I'd watched her do it, she took her finger out, spread my cunt lips with her fingers and began to shove the thing in.
"It didn't feel much different from when I used my finger, at first, but when she began to shove it in deeper, and it reached parts that I couldn't reach with my finger, I liked it. I relaxed and spread my legs more, so she could get it in deeper, and I concentrated on shoving the hot dog I had into her pussy.
"She said, 'Try to keep time with me. That way, we'll know when we're both ready to come.' So I did. I worked it slow at first and picked up speed as I felt her increasing the speed of my frank-cock. Towards the end, I closed my eyes and imagined that Ray was on top of me, shoving his big, hard cock into me. That made it better, and I looked down and saw that Moira was doing the same thing, and she was mumbling about Chuck and how good it was being fucked by him.
"I came all of a sudden, before she did, and I guess I let down on the movement of the hot dog into her, because she grabbed it and began shoving it in fast and furious, until she had her second come of the day. Then we just laid there, moving the franks slowly in and out, rubbing the knobs. I tried closing the muscles of my inner cunt around it, and was surprised at what a grip I could get on it.
"We washed out after that, and then we talked. I asked her if she'd tried other things, and she said she had tried a banana once, but it had hurt too much. She said she had heard that a broom handle worked good, but that she'd been afraid to try it because it had no 'give' to it -no bend, and besides, it looked pretty big around.
"When her parents came home, they were so pleased to find that Moira had a friend that they invited me to supper, but I told them I couldn't - not that night. So they asked me to come visit Moira any time. If they had only known!
"We saw each other quite a bit after that, but I learned a few things on my own, too. I found a long carving knife that had a long, curved wooden handle, and I tried that inside myself. It worked good, because while I laid on my back, I could shove it in so it massaged my knob, then went on up deeper and touched other sensitive places inside.
"I finally tried a broom handle, but it was hard to work it around, and I was afraid to try to cut off a foot of it. But later, I got an old broom out of the garage and cut off about ten inches of it. I was afraid of splinters, so I used sandpaper to smooth it down. My father had all that kind of junk around. That worked pretty good, but I used to get a little too hot and ram it too deep inside me, and it made me sore.
"I went back to the carving knife handle, and I found it helped a lot if I would take a hot dog and put it in my mouth and suck on it while I used the knife handle inside my cunt. That way, I could imagine that Ray was shoving his cock in my mouth while he was sucking and finger-fucking me. I used to be able to come fast, that way.
"Moira and I tried different things, too. She dug up an old flashlight that was made of plastic, and we discovered that the sliding switch on the side of the barrel really did a good job on your knob when it went inside you. Funny, but I didn't want Moira to suck my cunt. Fingering me was all right, although I couldn't come good that way, but when she tried to put her mouth on my pussy one time, I got mad and slapped her.
"Later, I masturbated while I thought about it, wondering if I'd made a mistake. After all, it was good when Ray had done it. But, we never did.
"Instead, we found something even better. Moira got a picture from a guy in school - you know, one of those dirty pictures of a man's prick, with a real, big hard-on. She made a model of it from some modeling clay she got from her kid brother, then she let it harden. It was wild. It had just the right bend to it and it went in deep, while it rubbed the knob at the front real good. We tried it on each other, and on ourselves alone, but it wasn't quite right. So Moira got the idea to try to fasten it to a belt or girdle, so we could use our body to shove it into the other person.
"Guess what she finally found that worked? She got one of those leather belts that the person who carries a flag in parades and marches wears. She fooled around with that, and she finally rigged up this thing that could hold the artificial prick pretty steady. She used glue and adhesive tape and other junk, but it finally did work pretty good.
"I let her try it on me first. Remember, I'd never been really screwed, and neither had she, so it was sort of funny at first. I had to laugh when I laid down and spread my legs and looked up and saw her standing there with that big, hard, cold prick sticking out from where her pussy ought to be. I had masturbated enough to get me juicy inside. I'd learned a long time ago about sticking something up inside your pussy when it wasn't lubricated.
"Moira knelt down between my legs, using both hands to guide that thing up into my cunt, while I spread the lips of it with my fingers, also helping her guide it in. It went in sort of hard. I know now that a man's cock has a lot of give to it, but that gimmick didn't. But once it began to slide in and out easily it began to feel good. Moira had to hang on to it with one hand, though, because it wasn't set on her too solid.
"After I got heated up good, she began to move it in and out faster and deeper, and I just laid back and imagined how Ray would feel, if that were his cock - or the guy that fucked my mother while I watched. Moira must have been getting her 'hots' too, because as I was about to come, she reached up with one hand and began to roll the nipple of one of my breasts in her thumb and forefinger, and she let her full weight go down on my body and then she started kissing me on the mouth, sticking her tongue in and out. I was so far gone on my come by that time that I just went along with it, imagining that it was Ray on top of me: his cock, his lips, his tongue!
"I came pretty good, and Moira stopped kissing me. I guess she must have felt guilty, because I did, too. She took the gadget out of my pussy and asked me how it had been. I told her it was 'all right,' but I didn't act too enthusiastic about it.
"She laid down on the bed and began to masturbate herself with her finger, and she rubbed her breast with the other hand. I strapped on the gimmick and watched her. I remember thinking that if I didn't stop fooling around with Moira like we had been, we were going to go down on each other one of these days. I liked the shape of her pussy. She didn't have much hair around it, and her lips were big, but sort of parted, so you could see inside.
"I don't think I really wanted to lick or suck her pussy, but I know that when I watched her finger-fuck herself, I used to think that I could have done it a lot better. And - I was curious to know if it was as good to have a girl suck your cunt as it was to have a man do it. I suppose, if she'd really made the first move, I'd have gone for it.
"But, anyhow, I got the phony cock strapped on. It did look a lot like Ray's had, and it had been pretty good, but I knew that the real thing must be ten times better. I think I began to feel cheated, or foolish, doing this with a clay prick when I knew damned well that I could have a real one, if I went after it or decided to have it.
"Moira spread her legs wide, and I knelt between her legs, shoving the fake prick into those nice, wide lips. I got a bang out of looking down and seeing that thing going in, farther and farther, and I wondered if a guy felt that same kick when he was shoving his dick into a girl.
"And Moira was really eating it up. She was moving her ass around, almost jumping up to make her knob meet the friction of that cock going in and out. She closed her eyes and began to massage one of her own nipples while she bounced up and down, and I could tell by the expression on her face and the panting and moaning she was doing that she was coming. I rammed that thing in hard and deep, and she groaned with loud, deep groans as she had her orgasm.
"I worked it in and out for a little while afterward, and I think she came a second time, but I'm not sure. If she did, it couldn't have been as good as that first one, because she just jumped a little, shuddered some, and then relaxed, keeping her eyes closed and saying, 'Mmmmmm... that was good.' "We tried a lot of different things, but none were too good. I didn't like the clay prick too much, but Moira said she used it a lot by herself.
"I asked her about this 'Chuck,' that she always mentioned, and I was surprised to hear that it was her young cousin who lived in the next block. He was only six! But she told me that for over a year, she had been babysitting with him, and that she played with his little prick and got it hard, and then she would suck it. She also used to get him to lay on top of her and try to put it in, but it wasn't as good as her finger, she said, because it was too tiny. She finally got him to lick and suck her pussy, but he used to get scared, and she never really did have a good come with her 'Chuck.' "We talked about doing the real thing, and who we'd pick if we really decided to do it. I told her about Ray, but we talked mostly about guys at school. She wanted some of the kids to do it to her, but I had a couple of older guys - two teachers especially - in mind. I knew that one of them, Mr. Waxier, had noticed me a lot. He was the boy's gym teacher, and he worked with the baseball and the track team, too. He was keen. He was tall, dark, lean - but with nice muscles. He was a substitute teacher in history, and I'd had him for a teacher quite a few times.
"I used to get all hot and think of Ray when he would look at me. He'd let his eyes stay on my breasts and on my pussy for a long time, and there was something in his eyes that told me he would like to see them naked, like Ray had. And - I think I knew that he wouldn't stop where Ray had, and that whatever he did to me, he'd do it way better than Ray had. He was married; I knew that. I'd asked another teacher.
"Then one day in school, Moira came in, bubbling all over with excitement. She couldn't wait to tell me that the night before, she'd had her first real fuck?
"She went into such detail about it that I almost wanted to masturbate. She'd gone to the movies with a boy from one of her classes. How he ever came to ask her, I'll never know, unless he knew that she was ripe for fucking. Or, maybe she really had asked him.
"Anyhow, she told me that while they were in the movies, he had played with her titties first, then had begun to run his hands up and down her snatch-lips, and finally, that he had masturbated her in the movies until she came. He took out his cock - they were in the last row of the balcony - and he put her hand on it, showing her how to jerk him off! She said she was wild to do it, and when he put his hand on her neck and pulled her head down so her mouth was near his cock, she just wanted to eat him all up! She sucked him until he came, then he played with her some more, and they left the movie before the first picture was over.
"They walked to the park and found a quiet, dark place where a lot of trees kept them from being seen. She told me how Tony took her pants off right away, and began to stick his fingers up inside her cunt, while he played with the nipples of her titties. They were on a bench, and he just laid her back, spread her legs cm each side of the bench, took out his cock and began to ram it home! I guess she went a little wild over it, because she didn't remember how many times he made her come. But she said it was like something no masturbating, or broomstick or hot dog or phony prick could give her. She was wild to keep the date she had with him on Friday, and as I said, I got so hot listening to her that I became aware for the first time how really badly I wanted a real man to put a real prick into my warm and waiting cunt!
"We had Mr. Waxier that morning because our history teacher was sick. I felt different, looking it him. When he looked at me - I sat in the front row - I deliberately spread my legs and hiked my skirt up a little to let him see all he could through my panties. I remember that I had some white ones on, and I hoped that he could see the dark part where my hair and slit was. I know he did. He almost went to pot and he could hardly concentrate on what he was saying or doing.
CHAPTER TWO - "Lessons After School"
"Actually, it shouldn't have been Mr. Waxier who broke my cherry. It could have been Arnold, but he was too damned dumb. He was a kid in school that was always making eyes at me, and he was nice. I mean, he didn't play grab-ass or try to brush his hands against my breasts - things like that. But he liked me, I knew that, and he was nice-looking, polite - and he had a car.
"He was 17, and I guess the reason he hadn't asked me out on a date was because the other guys used to call him a 'cradle-robber,' whenever he'd stop to talk to me at school.
"But, on the same day that I'd made up my mind about Mr. Waxier, Arnold asked if I'd like to go to a drive-in movie with him. I didn't think my parents would mind, so I said I would.
"They were usually too busy with their own affairs -and I mean affairs. I'd caught my mother a lot of times with other men - in bed. Of course, I didn't let her know that. And, I knew that my old man was screwing around, too. One of the girls at school - a catty little bitch that I never had liked - got in a big hassle with me one day, and she finally ended up by saying: 'Don't pretend to be such a goody-goody, Savvy. After all, everybody knows that your old man and my old lady have been fucking each other for years!' "Then, I thought she was just mouthing off, but I asked a few others, ones I could trust, and they hemmed and hawed, but they finally said that it was true. They hung around a gin mill that was owned by the father of one of the boys. That's how this dumb bitch knew it, I suppose. The boy had seen them, and had blabbed to anybody that would listen.
"I guess I had it half-figured out, anyhow, because it seemed awful strange that on the nights my mother would get all dolled up - way more than for my father -my dad would be away, working late, or some jazz like that. I don't know if I cared or not. We were reading about all the sex orgies and wife-swapping things going on, so I guess I just figured that my mom and dad were part of the scene.
"I think that sometimes, when they went out with Ray's parents, that they went to those things, because I would hear them talking when they got home, and they weren't talking softly, either. They always had a lot to drink, and my father was always asking my mother questions about the way some guy had made out; how it had felt; should he try it - all that.
"I knew what they were talking about, but maybe I didn't want to. You know, everybody likes to think that their parents are 'different'- better.
"But, about Arnie and the drive-in. I found out right off that his politeness was an act. We no sooner got parked than he was making a grab for my titties.
"Not that I minded, but I wanted him to take it a little slower -at least a couple of tongue kisses before we got down to anything sexy. But he got wild. Just the touch of his hand to my breasts got his prick bobbing up against his pants, and the next thing I knew, he's tearing my panties off - really tearing them. I didn't fight him, but I gave him a lot of talk, asking him what he had to act like an animal for, and all that.
"When he got my pants off, he almost tossed me into the back seat, and then he climbed over. He didn't care if anyone was watching, but we were almost in the back row of the drive-in, up, against the fence, so nobody noticed. Or if they did, they didn't gawk or let on to us.
"He just unzipped his pants to the limit, and got his cock out in his hand. He tried to position " me on the seat, and I tried to put my legs up so he could get it in because by then I was beginning to get scared. He just flopped on my ass and began jabbing his cock wildly. He was going up between my ass cheeks and even missing that spot with every other stroke, but he acted as if he didn't even notice, or know the difference.
"I know now that he'd never screwed a girl before. He didn't even know where a pussy was located. He humped away like a horny dog, and all at once I felt his juice spurt all over my ass, down the crack and onto my legs - and he hadn't even had his cock inside my cunt!
"He was all apologies after that. He was almost bawling, and when he asked if I was mad, I told him I was, and that I wanted to go home. He drove me home, apologizing all the way. When I got there, I was so frustrated that I masturbated at least three times, but I wasn't thinking of that dummy. I was remembering how Mr. Waxier kept looking at my snatch and my tits beneath my clothes, and more than ever, I made up my mind that it was going to be him that got into my pussy first.
"I worried a little about that silly Arnie going around and telling the guys at school how he'd screwed the hell out of me, but I made up my mind that if he did, I'd sure as hell set him straight about what he knew about fucking a girl!
"But, I'd come so close that I was getting hotter and hotter to have it, and I guess I really turned it on whenever I saw Mr. Waxier. And, he finally came across!
"I used to go out after school and watch the boys on the baseball team practice. A lot of the girls did, so it didn't cause any stir. I always managed to sit somewhere near Mr. Waxier so that I could let him get a good look at my panties, and if I had a blouse on that showed a lot, I'd bend over the water fountain when he was near - things like that. My boobies were getting pretty nice by then, and I could tell by the way he stared at them that I was getting to him.
"One day, he walked over at the end of practice and asked me if I had a way home. I told him I didn't live too far, but he asked me if he could give me a ride. Could he? I'd been waiting for a long time for the ice to melt. I knew it had melted inside him a long time ago, but I wanted all of him to be mine!
"He was worse than Arnie, when we first got into his car. I know he was nervous, because a lot of the guys were standing there, smirking and talking behind his back. But it was more than that, because after we had driven away and he was heading out towards the hills, he almost wrecked the car looking at my thighs and the bottoms of my panties.
"Then he pulled off to the side of the road and stopped the car. He put his arms around me, gentle-like, as if I would break if he squeezed me tight, and he kissed me. Nice, at first, on my lips and cheeks and ears, but then he began to part his lips and stick his tongue inside my mouth. I gave him as good as he gave me, and his hand went down inside my blouse and he squeezed and massaged my breast, playing with the nipple. I unbuttoned it, and he put his mouth on my nipple, sucking, kissing, nibbling, until I almost blurted out that I wanted him to fuck me.
"He slid his hand up between my legs until he came to my crotch, and he rubbed the lips of my cunt through my panties with his fingers. He was sweating and he was beet-red, and then all at once he stopped. He sat over on his side of the seat and looked at me, and he acted as if I'd slapped him.
"When I asked him what the matter was, he said, 'God, Savvy, I want you so bad. But I don't want it like this. I want you naked - in bed, with me naked - with no chance of anybody breaking in on us! I want you so bad - so bad. Can you understand?' "I put my hand on his bulging pants and rubbed, and I leaned over and kissed his cheek.
"What do you suppose I want?" I asked him, and then he took me in his arms again and this time he just kissed me - all over my face and neck and hair, without feeling me up.
"'Friday night, darling,' he said, and for my answer, I just rubbed his hard, throbbing cock harder, through his pants.
"He told me he'd have to arrange a place, and that I should fix it so that my parents thought I was staying with a friend. I didn't have to worry about that, because I already knew that they were going to a party, and I'd just tell them that I was staying with Moira.
"I don't know how we managed to keep our secret until Friday. I've got a big mouth, but I didn't tell a soul, and I tried to stay away from where I knew he'd be. But at seven on Friday, I was waiting at the corner where he was to pick me up, and he arrived less than five minutes after I did. He told me that he had fixed it so that his wife thought he was going to a school seminar in a town about 70 miles away, and that he had arranged for us to use the apartment of a bachelor friend of his that he could trust.
"He kissed me on the lips and squeezed my hand, and I felt like a real woman. I was having a secret meeting with a married man! A man who wanted me more than his wife! I didn't care if anyone saw us together, really, but I knew he was nervous, all the time we were driving to his friend's place. On the way, he stopped at a drugstore, and came out with a bag of booze - scotch and bottles of soda, and he had something else in there that I didn't know about then.
"He laughed and asked me if I'd ever had a drink, and I told him I had. I really had. My mom and dad used to let me have a drink of wine or beer, and once in a great while, my dad would slip me a good stiff belt of his whiskey. Sometimes Moira and I would take a belt of her father's stuff; bourbon, mostly, but sometimes vodka.
"'Tonight is just for us!' he laughed. He stopped at a hamburger joint and loaded up with nice, fat, juicy double-burgers and French fries, and then we went to his friend's place. It was a pretty flashy apartment building: pool, recreation room with pool tables and dart boards, a sauna bath, the works. I saw a few guys looking at us kind of funny - maybe they were envious - when we walked across the patio and past the pool, but nobody said anything.
"Mr. Waxler's friend had a real swinging place. He had thick rugs on the floor -even in the bathroom, bookcases that were crammed, a real snazzy stereo and some of the best 'rock' records around, but also a lot of longhair stuff. He had a great big living room and a real small kitchen and bedroom, but he had three couches in his living room, some easy chairs, and a poker table with a felt top and sections where you kept your chips and drinks.
"We broke out the hamburgers first, and Mr. Waxier fixed us a couple of drinks. Mine didn't taste good with the first bite of hamburger, but I got used to it. He just sat on the floor, munching and sipping, while I sat on the couch. He had pulled the drapes closed and turned on a soft light, and after my second hamburger and my second scotch, he began to look like a movie star.
"After a while, we just sat there. He had turned the stereo on, putting some soft, dreamy music on, and then he sat down beside me on the big couch. He leaned forward and put one hand on each of my breasts - I wasn't wearing any bra -and he kissed me, massaging my breasts while he stuck his tongue into my mouth.
"We didn't have to really warm up, but I liked it. I could already see the big bulge in his pants even while he was seated on the floor, looking up my dress. I wasn't wearing any pants, either, and he knew it because pretty soon he took one hand from my titty and slid it up between my thighs until he touched the hair around my pussy.
"He kept murmuring, 'Baby, oh my baby,' and after a little while, I began to be scared that he'd chicken out on me and really think I was a little girl, so I reached out and began to rub his cock through his pants. Then I unzipped them and took it in my hand, working it up and down, moving the soft skin over the wet head of it. He wasn't circumcised, and I found that extra exciting, being able to feel the wetness of him, the heat of his cock, and the little jerks and throbs that ran through it when I played with it that way.
"He began to run his fingers inside my cunt, rubbing my knob, getting me more excited by the second, and he kept on kissing me and massaging my breast until I couldn't wait any longer. I stood up and started to strip my clothes off.
"He just leaned back and watched me, his pants open. When I took off my sweater, then my blouse, and finally dropped my skirt, he almost drooled as he looked at me.
"I smiled at him and said, 'Well, aren't you going to get undressed, too?' He straightened up and slid out of his shirt, pants and shorts before I knew what was happening. While we were both standing up, he took me in his arms. Both his hands were around my ass, and he pulled me close to his big, hard prick. I rubbed my cunt against it, wiggling and rotating my hips, and I sucked his tongue into my mouth as deep as I could. I never wanted to see another broomstick or phony cock again! I just wanted to be fucked!
"I'd waited a long time for a real grown-up man to do what Mr. Waxier was going to do. I enjoyed the look in his eyes as I sat down and spread my legs and let him look at my naked cunt. I watched his tongue flick over his lips, like a person's will when he is anticipating something juicy and delicious.
"But I knew I wanted more than just his tongue; and I could tell by the size of his cock that he wouldn't stop with just licking and sucking my pussy.
"I remembered all the times I had masturbated - dreaming about a prick like his. It was a lot bigger and longer than Arnie's, and I knew he wouldn't be as dumb as Arnie about fucking, because he was a man -and married - while Arnie had been a little scared rabbit.
"Mr. Waxier knelt in front of me and spread the lips of my cunt with his fingers, looking at my knob. It must have been jumping and throbbing with wanting him to do something more than just look.
"His breath began to become noisy as he moved his face closer. Then his tongue began touching my thighs, just where they joined my body, and he ran it around the hair above my pussy, then across the lips of my snatch! I propped myself up on my elbows so I could look down and watch as his tongue moved inside the lips of my pussy. I wanted to grab his head and shove his tongue as deep inside my cunt as it would go, but I knew that it would be better his way; slow, teasing - the way he was doing it.
"I reached down and shoved one finger inside my cunt, and then took it out and pushed it in his mouth. He licked it, then sucked it. I got a real charge out of it.
"Then he moved my hand away, crouching down lower so he could get his dead down farther. His tongue flicked up between my ass cheeks and then I could feel it tickling my asshole! This was new and different, and it made me hunch my ass up a little. And when I did, he spread my ass cheeks and stuck his tongue up inside my asshole! It was so exciting, so new, that I was glad I hadn't grabbed him and made him make me come with his tongue! He put one finger inside my cunt and massaged my little knob, easily at first, while he kept on sticking his tongue deeper into my asshole, driving me insane.
"I knew I would come if he didn't stop, but I didn't really want him to. It was all so good, so much what I'd dreamed it would be like with a real man. My breasts were even tingling from his kisses and his nibbling at them, and I felt like every bit of my body was on fire!
"He took his tongue out of my rear and began to run it up and down around the hair close to my cunt, while he kept using his finger inside my pussy. Once in a while, he'd move his tongue up quickly, never losing contact with my flesh, and plunge it into my belly button! That gave me a new thrill, too.
"When he began to lick and kiss the inside of my thighs, I was almost exploding - I wanted everything at once! I wanted to suck him, yet I wanted him to be doing what he was doing, and at the same time, I wanted to be fucked. I was being thrilled as I had dreamed I would be and as I looked down at his face, watching the hazy look in his half-closed eyes, I knew that he was enjoying it as much as I was.
"I wanted to laugh out loud, just for the joy he was giving to my body. I remembered how he had looked in class or on the ball field when he had looked at my crotch, and I wanted to laugh and shout because now, everything we both wanted so much for so long was happening. I couldn't wait until I had that big, wet-headed, hard prick inside my body. I knew it had to be a hundred times better than anything Ray or Moira or Arnie - or I - had ever done to me.
"He stopped all at once, took his finger out, and just sat there, looking at my open cunt with a look of hunger. Then he stood up, and I couldn't take my eyes off his hairy belly, and the thick hair around his balls and cock. It was long and thin, but it seemed alive. The wet, red tip of it just showed boldly beneath the skin that half-covered it, as if it was ready to charge and take on the whole world. I was so eager to have it shoved into my cunt that it seemed as if I was watching a slow motion movie.
"I was conscious of the thought that this was no boy. This was no teenage Ray; no fumbling, stupid Arnie. This was a man - and what a man!
"He took his lovely prick in his hand and moved it around, sort of waving it, so I could get a good look at all of it. Then he said, 'Can you take it, baby - all of it, all the way?' "I was shuddering in anticipation, but all I could do was nod and reach out and kiss the tip of it. I fell back and spread my legs wide and my knees up, waiting.
"He reached for his pants and took out a packet of something and took out a round, white disc. He put the middle of it over the head of his cock and began to roll it backwards over that pretty prong until he had it all on, leaving a little loose part that dangled down at the tip of his prick. It wasn't until he had it all on that I realized that he had put on a rubber! It sort of shocked me, and made me a little mad at first. He thought I had a disease!
"But he explained it as he moved onto the couch, positioning himself between my legs, which I had spread wide. 'I don't want you getting pregnant, baby,' he said. 'There's too much fun ahead for us to spoil it.' "I didn't care. I just wanted him to shove it in hard, quick, and deep. I didn't want him to be gentle. I wanted to be fucked - like a woman, not a little girl. I was a woman! I'd been a woman for a long, long time - sexually. He moved closer, putting the end of his rubber-encased prick into the opening of my cunt, while he lifted my ass up with both hands, inching his way toward me with the use of his knees. I moved, using my hands, to help us get closer. Oh, how I wanted that thing inside me!
"I hoped that he would hurt me, because I wanted to remember this so clearly - my first fuck with a real man!
"He began to move back and forth, and I reached down and opened the lips of my cunt wide. I was wet and juicy, and I felt like an oven inside. I knew it wouldn't hurt, because of the broom and the hot dogs and the phony gimmick | that Moira had made, and he was being gentle - too gentle. I wanted it all the way in, like he'd asked me if I could take.
"I had to say it! I had to! I almost begged him, 'Fuck me, all the way, doll - hard and fast and deep!' And that was all he needed. When he rammed it into me as far as he could go, I knew that this was it! This was the dream. This was all the finger-fucks and masturbations and screwing myself with things, all wrapped into one and increased by a million times! He fell forward and let go of one ass cheek, and he reached up and nipped one of my nipples with his fingernails. It was perfect, and when he shoved his tongue into my wide-open, panting mouth, I couldn't hold back. He knew from the way I moved my ass and hips, that I was coming, and he jammed his tongue into my mouth deeper and deeper, and I could hear the slap of our wet, sweating skin as his belly bammed into mine!
"At the end, it felt as if he were touching the bottom of my tonsils, but oh, it was wonderful. It was beautiful. I could feel the tip of that rubber swell up and get warm when he shot his load into me, and I wished he didn't have it on. I wanted to have that hot, wet stuff way up inside me. Maybe I even wanted a baby, I don't know.
"But I did know I'd been fucked by a man at last, and that I'd been wasting a lot of valuable time. I wanted more, and I wanted his naked prick inside me.
"I moved away and he got up and went into the bathroom to take off the rubber and wash his cock off. But when he came back, his prick was as stiff and lovely as ever, and I decided to take over. I motioned him over to me, and when he got near the couch, I just reached out and pulled him close, and I took his cock in my hand and shoved it in my mouth, sucking and licking and using my tongue the way Ray had taught me men liked to have it done.
"Mr. Waxier just stood there, looking down at me in a sort of daze. Towards the end, he moved over and straddled my face on the couch, and began to shove it deep into my mouth. I turned on everything I knew how until I felt him come in my mouth. Then I pushed him away and ran for the bathroom and spit all the white, salty juice into the toilet and flushed it.
"When I came out, he had freshened up our drinks, and while I sipped mine - or tried to - he sucked my titties and moved on down to between my legs. He seemed to know ah the places that turn a woman on. He used his tongue, his fingers - even his nose, at times, to touch every sensitive spot. I didn't last three minutes, and when I came, he just clung to my ass, his lips glued to my pussy lips, sucking and moaning in joy.
"Almost automatically, he switched around so that I could get his prick in my mouth, and he could get his head between my legs, and we sucked and licked and moaned while we made each other come again. He put his finger up inside my asshole while he was kissing me, and it turned me on even more, so I came a little before he did.
"But I got the message, and when I shoved my finger up his asshole and began to move it in and out, he really came - so deep inside my throat that I didn't have a chance to spit it out. So, I just swallowed it. It didn't taste bad - salty, sort of powdery or milky, but not too bad.
"I knew that I didn't yet have the right feeling. I'd been thrilled by everything, but I had a feeling I'd been cheated by that goddamned rubber he'd worn, and I wanted to feel it up inside me, naked.
"I worked on every sensitive spot on him, from his mouth to his asshole, with my mouth and hands, and when he was ready to pop his cork right in my hand, I pulled him up on top of me and spread my legs. I didn't give him a chance to even think about those damned rubbers - I just put his cock inside my cunt and moved my hips up while I grabbed his ass and pulled. I knew he didn't have the willpower to stop then and put one of his rubbers on. He eased it farther and farther into me, and he slowly managed to get his hands under and around my ass, and lifted me up higher so he could go into me deeper.
"All the while, he was using one finger in my asshole. I had worked some pillows under my fanny and that helped put me higher, and I just concentrated every ounce of my thinking on feeling his big wet prick going deeper and deeper, touching spots that I hadn't even been able to reach with the broomstick or Moira's phony clay cock.
"Near the end, I slid my legs up and locked them around his hips. I dug my heels into his butt, like a cowboy spurring a horse, and he let go of my ass and put his arms around me so that I was hardly lying on the couch, and I felt like our bodies were just one piece of hot, wild flesh. I could feel that prick going in so deep, and it was like I was standing aside - another person altogether, watching Mr. Waxier and I going at it, and I wondered how it would be to do it with a man like him in a room where there were mirrors all around. I'd seen that in a movie somewhere. I wanted to try it soon.
"I could feel his lunges getting quicker, and deeper, and he began to stick his tongue into my mouth and suck my own tongue, and I knew he was coming. 'I wanted to feel all that hot stuff shooting up into me, and I just let myself go. I moaned through his kissing, 'Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me!' and it seemed to turn him on even more and he came in a big burst of moaning, sweating, sucking my tongue and at the end, biting my lips and tongue - hard.
"It stung, but it felt good, and I just kept on moving the muscles inside me, wanting him to keep his cock in there forever. He eased up the lunging and finally stopped, but he left it inside me, and I squeezed the muscles inside me around it and pretty soon it got hard again.
"He was making love to me with his lips, even murmuring in my ear that he 'adored me,' that he 'worshipped me,' and that I was the most 'wonderful woman that God ever made.' When he used the word 'woman,' it made me even prouder and hotter than I had been before, and we just naturally drifted into my third fuck without ever letting our bodies part. I came quickly that time, and was ready to come again by the time he did.
"When he rolled off I was still ready, but I played with his cock a little and it was real flabby and didn't come up at all, even when I kissed and sucked it, so I gave up.
"He just laid there for ten minutes, looking at me, running his hands over my breasts and over the lips of my cunt and in the crease of my ass, saying how beautiful I was and how wonderful my body was.
"We had some more drinks, and we planned how we would be able to see each other often. I asked him about his wife: how she was in bed; and was she as good a fuck as I was. It sort of embarrassed him, but he said that his wife was all right, but nowhere near as wonderful or sexy as I was.
"I asked him if there was anything else that he wanted to try, and he admitted that he wanted to try 'dog fashion,' with him mounting me from the rear.
"We hadn't put our clothes back on, and as we had talked and kissed and touched each other, I had watched his prick come back up, from time to time. I got all hot again while we were talking about his wife. He'd told me that the one thing she wouldn't do was to suck his prick until he came. She would suck it a little, until it got hard, but then she would stop.
"He had told me how wonderfully I did that, and how it had felt when he could look down and see my sweet, soft mouth going down over his cock, and how it felt when he shot into my mouth. All that had really turned me on again, and when he said he wanted it 'dog fashion,' I went back to the couch and got on my hands and knees.
"I asked him if that was the way he meant, and he grinned and put his drink down, and when he walked over, his prick was sticking up and bouncing as he walked, like a little flagpole. I discovered that, by moving a little so I was crosswise on the bed, I could look into a mirror that was on a big dresser and see us. Before he got onto the bed, I had him turn on all the lights, and I could see real good.
"He got on the bed, kneeling behind me. I watched in the mirror as he reached underneath me with one hand, spreading the lips of my cunt, and he guided the tip of his prick into my cunt. After it was sliding in and out easily, he leaned back and put both hands on my hips. He was almost erect, and he could look down and watch his dinger going into my slit, and I watched him in the mirror. In this position, it seemed that he could go even deeper inside me, and it gave me some special kicks. He let go of my hip with one hand and reached down between the crack of my ass and put one finger into my asshole, moving it in and out in time to his plunges into my cunt.
"It made me feel as if I was filled with him, and it added an extra something to be able to look over and see him doing all these things, at the same time that I could feel so much of him inside me. We both tried to hold back, to make it last as long as we could, but after about three minutes he took his finger out of my asshole and grabbed both hips again. He stopped looking down, and just began to pump away, hitting deeper and deeper, and I watched in the mirror, thinking how much we did look like a couple of dogs going at it.
"Then he exploded inside me and I came in a big rush, at the same time that I could feel all his hot juices flooding my cunt. I flopped forward on my face, and he fell on top of me, letting his prick stay inside me. We both just lay there, breathing hard, and he kept murmuring how wonderful I was, and how he adored me. We lay that way for a long time, while I half turned my head and he sucked my tongue and kissed my ear.
"He pulled his prick out of me and moved down, with me still lying on my stomach. He began to run his tongue up and down the crack of my ass, and then he spread the cheeks with his hands and started to tickle my asshole with his tongue! He ran it inside a little way, wiggling it and with his one hand, he reached underneath me and began to stick his fingers up inside my cunt, massaging my knob and making it jump and throb, while he kept on sticking his tongue up into my asshole. He kept on doing it until I came, but I didn't want to. I could always masturbate myself, and I wanted more of the things he could do with his cock and his lips.
"He didn't say a word, just eased me back up onto my hands and knees, and he got behind me again on his knees. Then he spread the cheeks of my ass with one hand and guided the shaft into me. It surprised me, but it didn't shock me, when I felt the head of his prick start to go into my asshole! It felt awfully big, but it didn't really hurt. I spread my legs wider, to make it go in easier, and I watched in the mirror as he slowly eased it in, deeper and deeper.
"He kept looking down, watching it go into my brown, and it seemed to turn him on more than anything else had up until then. He grabbed my hips and really began to ram it in, in a hard, steady rhythm. It was hurting, as he went up into me so that the full length of his prick was buried in my asshole, but I could see him in the mirror, and he was so carried away, so intense, that I was glad it hurt a little, I'd remember it better that way.
"Fortunately, he came quick that way - about a minute after it began to slide in and out easily. I didn't come, but I felt awfully good when he pulled it out, because I knew that he had really had the limit of pleasure from using my asshole.
"He began to apologize, and he seemed ashamed, but I rolled over and kissed him and told him that it hadn't hurt. I told him I had enjoyed it, even if I hadn't come. He was so grateful; he kissed my eyes and ears and then my breasts, just saying over and over again how wonderful I was, and what a real woman I was. He told me that that was the one thing he had always wanted from a woman, and that I was the very first one that had let him fuck her in the asshole. That made me feel pretty proud, too.
"He asked me what he could do to repay me, and I told him that I wanted one more straight fuck, and he played with my cunt and with his own cock, until he got a good hard-on. When he got on top of me this time, he was more loving, more 'kissy' and soft, and he concentrated on making me come good. I came, but I wasn't sure I hadn't enjoyed it more when he was rougher.
"We talked about our next date, and he promised that he would get some Vaseline, to make it easier for him to shove it in my asshole, and we talked about how much I knew about taking care of myself,' so I didn't get pregnant. I told him that I knew about taking a douche, because they had told us in hygiene class at school. I knew about the birth control pill, too, but I told him I didn't know how to get any. He said he'd fix that. He would use the same prescription that his wife did, and get me the pills right away. He did, too. He brought them to school on Monday and gave them to me. I've been taking them ever since, but now I can get them on my own.
"He said we'd have to find a different place to meet, because he didn't want his friend to find out that it was a student and a minor that he was dating. We decided to meet on Wednesday night at a motel, because that was the night he was supposed to bowl, and he could easily arrange for a guy to fill in for him. But he would have to leave around 11, so his wife would think that he'd been bowling.
"I knew that I could fix it with Moira to say that we were going to the movies or something, so I didn't worry about my end of the date. My parents didn't really suspect anything, and if they had, I doubt if they would have been too shook up. If my mother had ever gotten too noisy about it, I knew that I could put her in her place by telling her what I knew about her, and what they said about Dad and his little dates. Also, the many times I'd heard them talking over their sex parties, in fine detail.
"I don't think I hated them for being the way they were about swapping partners, but I sure as hell didn't respect them and I wasn't about to take any shit from them about what I did, even if I was only 15. I figured that I owed them nothing. They owed me all they could give, and as far as a home, clothes, and spending money, they paid off all right. What I did with my time and my life and my body, was my business.
"At school on Monday, Moira was dying to know what kind of time I'd had, but I just told her enough to tease her. I just smiled and told her that Mr. Waxier had said I was the 'most woman he'd ever been with,' and that we had set up a regular dating schedule. I teased and told her that if she was a good little girl, I might tell her about the mirror, and the front and back ways I'd learned. She got so hot I thought she would come in her pants or have to go to the bathroom and masturbate, but that was all I told her, then.
"I could see her trying to warm up to Waxier, but he had no more interest in her than in the boys in his classes. He was careful not to notice me too much, and he sneaked the pills to me with a little note telling me how to take them, when no one else was around. He sneaked one quick kiss, and put his hand on my pussy, but that was all. 'Till Wednesday, beautiful,' he said, and walked away.
"We met at least twice a week for over five months, and he was better each time. He showed me a lot of ways that he had always wanted to try. He had some books with pictures in, and instructions for ways that they didn't illustrate, and we tried a lot of them. His favorite ones were up my asshole, from the front. I mean, he'd position himself half underneath me while we were lying on our sides, and I'd put my one leg up high, and he'd insert his cock into my asshole from the front, while he or I Would masturbate my pussy, so we would come at the same time.
"But our real favorite was with him sitting on a low stool and me straddling his hips. That way, we faced each other, and I really controlled the movements. I would use my legs to bounce up and down, while he would put his hands underneath my ass and help with the movement. I think we both liked that the best because we could look into each other's eyes and see the pleasure and the want there, while we satisfied each other to the limit. And his prick went in awfully deep that way, but at the same time, the friction against my knob was really something, with every stroke, in and out.
"I guess maybe it was fun too, because I felt as if I was in the driver's seat.
"We never went out with each other except to go to bed, but he was awful good to me. He used to surprise me with little presents, like fancy panties, candy, and he almost always gave me 20 dollars, just to get whatever I wanted for myself. He usually brought some scotch, and I learned to like it, but we never did go into a bar. Sometimes, we would play the radio and dance stark naked after we'd warmed up with a couple of different ways of fucking. I used to like to have him sit and watch me show him the new steps, while he'd sort of play with his cock and smile over at me, as proud of my body as I was.
"I began to notice one of the other men teachers at school making up to me. He was sly about it, but he would make little complimentary remarks about my dress, or my legs, or how nice a sweater looked on me. I was flattered, but it took me a long time to figure out that he wasn't just fishing in the dark - he knew about Mr. Waxier and me, because it was his apartment that we'd used for our first date. He finally came right out and asked me why I didn't go out with him. He said that after all, he was single, while my regular date was married, and that with him, there would be no problems, no worries and maybe even more fun.
"He was younger - maybe around 26 or so - and when he let me know that he knew about Mr. Waxier, I got mad to think that Waxier would talk about it to another man. But it turned out that he hadn't. The sneak had waited that first night and watched us go into his apartment. He had known right from the beginning about me.
"Waxier didn't dare to say anything nasty to him, for he was afraid that Dearden - that was the other teacher's name - would tell his wife. She was already getting shook up and suspicious about him being out so many nights. On one date, Waxier showed up boiling mad, and he told me that Dearden had hinted that he - Waxie, as I had begun to call him - had better put in a good word with me about him, or he might 'bust up Waxie's little love dream.' I could tell that Waxie really believed he would, because he was worried all that night. Finally, he asked me what he should do.
"I wasn't dumb. I knew that what he was asking was, would I maybe give Dearden a date, to get him off our backs. To tell the truth, I had begun to wonder how it would be to try it with a few other guys. Not that Waxie didn't excite me and give me a ball with sex, but I was curious about some others. And I was getting a little fed up with his increasing worry about his wife.
"I told him to let me take care of Dearden, and to stop worrying about it. That satisfied him for then, and when Dearden cornered me next day and made his pitch, I surprised the hell out of him by telling him I'd meet him that night - if he could meet my price! He asked what it was, thinking I was putting him on, and I told him fifty bucks a night! He just laughed and said: 'O.K., honey, but you'd better be good and you'd better also give green stamps.' I didn't tell Waxie, I just went to Dearden's place that night. I was actually looking forward to it, because when we had been kibitzing around a couple of times,, I had seen his pants begin to bulge out, and also, he wasn't a bad-looking guy - better looking than Waxie - more muscular and athletic.
"But when I got there that night, about seven-thirty, Bill Dearden was stoned to the ears! He had been thinking it over (he told me later) and didn't think he could go for any jailbait. He was actually scared that Waxie would go after him and rack his ass up good, because what I didn't know until Waxie told me afterwards was that Dearden had already been mixed up with a 13 year-old girl in another state, and had almost gone to jail.
"But when I found him that stoned, I just got disgusted with him. I had to get my licks in, so I told him that I wouldn't know what to do with a 'queer,' anyhow, and for him to go after a couple of the homosexuals in school that I could give him the names of.
"Then I walked out, thinking that was the last I would see of Bill Dearden."
CHAPTER THREE - "Sex With An Athlete"
"A boy at school, Ken Wilson, had been asking me to go on dates with him. I had wanted to, in a way, but I didn't want to spoil it between Waxie and me, so I'd been putting Ken off with silly excuses. But, after the scene with Bill Dearden and Waxie becoming more scared all the time and starting to hedge a little about being able to keep some dates, I thought it was about time I tried somebody else.
"Ken was a nice-looking boy and had all the dates he ever wanted. He was tall, and played basketball and baseball, and he was good at both of them. He was a senior in high school - our school was a combination of junior high and high, but in different buildings - and he had already been offered a scholarship for basketball at a nearby college.
"He had his own car, dressed nice, and was polite enough, but in a breezy, teasing way. I mean, he'd ask me for a date, then he'd grin and let his eyes go down to my breasts and then over my crotch, and he'd say: 'After all, Savvy, I do other things besides play basketball and baseball. I know lots of ways a guy can score points.' "I finally accepted his offer of a drive-in movie, and I hoped he would know more about what to do than that dumb-ass Arnie had. Somehow, I knew that he would. I knew it even more when he picked me up and, on the way, he broke out a bottle of booze. I don't know if he guessed it or not, but he seemed to know I liked scotch. Maybe I'd mentioned it, kiddingly. But we belted down a few, and when he got to the drive-in he got some ginger ale to chase it with and we were feeling pretty mellow by the time the first movie was under way.
"He kissed me a couple of times, sticking his tongue into my mouth, and letting his hand go down to brush my titties. I made it look accidental when I let my hand rest between his legs, and I could feel that he already had a halfway hard-on. We were sitting in the back seat, and I wasn't wearing any bra, and when I touched his cock through his pants, he jumped and ran his hand inside my blouse. He rolled the nipple of my tit around on his fingers for a minute, then unbuttoned my blouse and bared one titty and began to tickle it with his tongue and lips, then nibble at it with his teeth and suck it until the nipple was hard and upright.
"I was rubbing his cock through his pants and it was real big and stiff, and I unzipped his pants and took it out. Then he reached down and began to play with the hair around the lips of my pussy, sliding his hand up the leg of my panties.
"'Will you blow me, honey?' he whispered in my ear. I told him, 'Yes, but not here. Drive somewhere and I will.' "I almost drove him crazy, playing with his prick while he was driving out to a lonely section of the town. It was near some big feedmills, and at night there were only a couple of watchmen on duty, and they were always in a shack on the front of the grounds. We parked way in the back, behind some smaller sheds.
"By that time Kenny was wild and I had gotten pretty worked up from playing with his prick, too. He asked me to get out of the car, saying that he didn't like to be all cramped up when he screwed a girl. I slid off my panties and he took his pants off, but left his shorts on. He walked around the car and began to kiss me, holding my ass with both hands and pulling my pussy in close to him. I could feel his cock sticking hard into my stomach and I began to move my hips and rub his cock with my body.
"Ken just reached down and inserted the head of it into my lips, and I half leaned against the fender of the car while he shoved it deeper into me. The metal was cold on my ass, but I soon forgot that when he began to hit the right spots inside my cunt. He put his hands underneath my ass at the last, and was almost lifting me onto his rigid prick. He was tall, and had to sort of crouch to pump it all into me, but when he came, I was right with him, and he was good. Maybe not as exciting as Waxie usually was, but I figured that was because we hadn't had the time or the right place for a lot of playing and kissing and sucking, to get really ready for a good fuck.
"When he pulled it out and wiped it off with his handkerchief, I began to play with it some more, grabbing the handkerchief and finishing cleaning him off. Then I bent over and took the head of it in my mouth and sucked and played, and in a minute, he was hard and ready again.
"The ground was pretty hard and gravelly, so he put his coat down and I laid down on the ground, and we went at it for a second time. His prick seemed extra long, and when he really pushed it in, he hit spots way inside me that really got to me, because he was making good contact with my knob with every jab.
"But he was not really romantic about it. He didn't try to kiss me while he was coming, and he took it all pretty casually, so it lost a little something. I guess that older men know how to make a production out of sex, and make it more enjoyable for themselves and for the woman.
"I never did go out with Ken again, though he asked me a lot of times, but that was because I had met Karen, the night that old Dooley almost raped me. But, maybe I'd better back off and tell it in the order that it happened.
"Waxie and me had begun to cool it, and he started to get a little anxious and then a little nasty when I got tired of being pushed off on several regular date nights. So when he did finally set up a date, I turned him down cold. I also got even with him a little by telling him about Ken, and I made up a couple of other names and told Waxie that I had had some pretty good fucking from some of the younger guys, and really liked them better than old farts like him.
"I pushed too hard, because he grabbed me outside the locker room one night after school, and really began to maul me. He was wild for me, he told me, and if he had to rape me right there in the school, he would. I laughed at him and I grabbed for his cock and really gave it a squeeze, balls and all. I really hurt him, and he got madder than ever. He took a hard slap at me and it sort of stunned me, but it made me mad, and I kicked at his balls. I missed, but my shoe point got him a good one in the shins, and he began to come after me and I ran. I turned a comer of the hall and ran into the first room I came to with the door open, and shut it behind me and put the latch on.
"He came after me and called my name and tried a couple of the doors, but I didn't make a sound. I didn't even realize that there was anyone else in the room until old Dooley came up quietly behind me and put his arms around me, with both hands covering one of my titties, and said, 'What's the matter, baby? Somebody after you? I'll take care of you. Just relax, I'll take care of you.' "I'd never even noticed the bald-headed old bastard as a man. He must have been fifty if he was a day, and he taught English. When I recognized him, I remembered that some of the girls had been talking about how free he was with his hands, and how he used to try to play grab-ass with some of them, and that he was a horny old man.
"For a second, I didn't know whether to chance him, or take a chance on Waxie cooling off and being sensible, but I didn't figure that an old bastard like Dooley would give me any problems, so I just took his hands off my titties and moved away from him. I guess it got him pretty excited, feeling my little round tits, because I noticed that his hard was showing through his pants, although I hadn't felt it when he shoved up against me.
"Funny, but I felt as if I were boss in the situation. I guess that was because of the way the old fart was slobbering. I turned around and glared at him, and he moved in closer and his hand shot out and grabbed my cunt! He really dug his fingers in, moving them quickly, trying to shove them up inside me, right through the dress and panties. I hauled back to smack him, but he grabbed me with one arm and just held me helpless while he went on digging his fingers into my cunt.
"Then he forced me back across a front row desk and he stuck his tongue into my mouth. He had worked the miniskirt up with his finger motions, and I felt his fingers inside my panties and digging into the flesh of my pussy. All of a sudden, I wasn't mad. I began to get hot as hell, as his fingers went into my cunt, deeper and deeper. And he was still digging into the flesh and I began to suck his tongue and stick mine into his mouth. He kept that up until I was almost ready to come, then he stopped and reached up and began pulling my panties down. I lifted up my behind so he could get them off, and I was all hot to come when he took them off. He had unzipped his own pants and pulled out his tool.
"I wasn't too comfortable on the desk, but I tried to spread my legs so he could put it in. He lifted my ass with one hand and was just starting to slide his prong into me when I got off balance and began to slide off the desk top. He grabbed me, and somehow we both fell on the floor. I didn't hurt myself much, but I screamed involuntarily, and the next thing I knew, the door burst open and there stood Miss Adams, looking like an angry cop.
"She ran in and began to kick at Dooley. He was stunned and in a way it was comical - him sitting there, with his big, hard cock sticking up, and Miss Adams kicking the hell out of him. Instead of trying to protect himself and get away, he was trying his damnedest to get his cock back in his pants!
"He finally got it in and scrambled to his feet. I just laid there, watching the show, but all at once Miss Adams quit kicking and slapping at Dooley, and she came over and helped me up. Dooley beat it out and closed the door after him, and we could hear him running down the hall.
"Miss Adams was brushing off my clothes and she bent over and picked up my panties. She was saying, 'You poor baby. What an awful thing to have happen. That dirty old man! Such an awful experience. You poor dear!' "I told her I was all right, not to worry, and I reached for my panties, but she put them behind her back. She said, 'Are you sure he didn't hurt you, dear? Better let me have a look.' She reached out and raised my skirt, and knelt down on the floor, looking at my pussy. It was still throbbing and wet from Dooley's fingering and tongue sucking, and I was too surprised to do anything. I just stood there while she reached up and stroked the lips of my cunt, real gentle.
"She dropped the panties and used both hands to spread the lips of my cunt, and she kept saying, 'You poor baby, you sweet, little baby doll,' and then she began to lick the inside of my pussy with her tongue! She reached around and took my ass cheeks in her hand and pulled me to her. When she began to make hard contact with my knob, I put my hands around her head and helped set up a regular rhythm.
"I was hot to come when she had busted in on us, and she had me all whipped up again after a few strokes with her tongue. She began to moan as she could feel my knob jumping around, and she worked one finger up into my asshole and began to work it in and out in time to her tongue going in and out of my cunt.
"I came pretty good, and I tangled my fingers in her hair and really pulled her mouth into my hot box. She kept on with her sucking and tonguing me, and I was half squatting so that she could get her tongue in farther. At the moment, I was too interested in getting my rocks off to think that this was my first time with a woman.
"Miss Adams - I learned later that her first name was Edna - kept nipping at the folds of flesh and at my knob with her teeth - not enough to hurt me, but it got me worked up again in a hurry. She kept right on with her finger in my asshole, and she took the other hand away from my ass and ran two of her fingers up inside my cunt, touching the walls of it deep inside, while her tongue and teeth were taking care of the lips and the knob just inside the opening.
"When I came that time, I really had a big one. It sent the chills all the way up to my eyebrows when she kept on chewing gently on my knob while I was coming. I still had my hands in her hair, but she didn't seem to mind my pulling it, because she was moaning and groaning in pleasure as I tapered off from the big orgasm.
"She Anally stood up, and with one hand caressing my wet pussy, the fingers going inside me gently to touch my still throbbing knob, she held me close and I knew she was going to kiss me. I wanted her to, and I opened my mouth wide for her tongue. She had the softest lips, and when her tongue slid into my mouth, I sucked it gently, then slid my tongue into her mouth and sucked and tickled her tongue.
"Her fingers inside my cunt were moving faster now, and while we stood there and tongue-kissed, she made me come again with her fingers.
"When I relaxed after I'd come, she said, 'Come home with me, baby. Please - please. I want you to do me -so badly. Please come home with me.' "She had made me feel so goddamned good that I wanted more. I had a funny feeling that I owed her the same thing, and I wanted to put my tongue into her cunt and make her come as good as she had made me. I gave her my answer by grabbing her and sticking my tongue into her mouth. She was so happy, and I noticed for the first time how really pretty she was and what a nice shape she had. Edna, I found out later, was only 27, and she picked my panties up and put them on me, letting her hands brush lovingly against the lips of my cunt as she did so.
"We got to her apartment in her car, and on the way, we talked about Dooley, and whether I should report it or not. I didn't want to, and Edna said that perhaps the best thing to do would be for her to tell Dooley that if he wanted to avoid a rape charge, he had better ask for a transfer out of the school.
"Edna asked me if that was the first time I'd been kissed by a woman, and I told her the truth - that I had been kissed like that by a man, but that she was the first woman I'd ever had do it. 'Was it good?' she asked me. I told her it was better than a man, and she said that when we got to her place, we could be more comfortable and completely nude. I kept watching her crotch while she drove. She wore fairly short skirts, and when she got into the car it had inched up so that I could see her panties. I played a little game with myself, wondering if the hair on her pussy was blonde, like the hair on her head was. I guessed that she dyed it a little, but it was a pretty gold, not the flat white shade that a lot of bleached blondes have.
"She had a really nice apartment, all decorated in real frilly, feminine style. There wasn't any embarrassment for me now, and I was looking forward to seeing her body without any clothing on. We stopped in the living room and kissed, and she began to take my clothes off right away. I reached around and unzipped her skirt and took it off, then her blouse and her bra. I could hardly wait to kiss the taut, hard nipples on her breasts. She had lovely breasts, round and nicely shaped, but not much bigger than mine, and when I took one in my mouth and nibbled lightly at the nipple, it brought Edna to a real high pitch.
"While I was kissing her breast, I reached down and slid her panties off. Then I stepped back and looked at her, and what a beautiful body she had! The hair around her pussy was a light honey-color, and it looked soft and silky and I could see the lips of her cunt, and the folds of darker flesh inside, and it made me just want to get down on my knees like she had and eat her up!
"I remember thinking that I must be a Lesbian, after all. I know better now - I'm a bisexual - but at the time, I just didn't care. I knew that I was crazy over Edna, and that I just had to bring pleasure to that lovely cunt, and those pretty titties and that sweet, pretty mouth.
"I started to bend over to touch and kiss her cunt, but she stopped me and led me into the bedroom. She had a king-size bed, with a pretty baby-blue decor in the entire room - blue and white, and it just made me feel sexy and more womanly than I ever had before. Funny what colors can do to your mood, but that softness just made me want to be soft - sexy - but soft and girlish.
"Edna gently pushed me down on the bed, and she got on and partially covered me with her body. We kissed, long, hungry kisses, and I played with her nipples while she ran her fingers over the lips of my cunt. I began to get so hungry for her that I squirmed away and started to get down between her legs. She kept calling me 'lover,' and 'doll-baby,' and telling me how beautiful and wonderful I was, and then she laid down on her back and spread her legs wide, and I slid down so that I could get to her cunt.
"I spread the lips of it, just loving the feel of the warm, wet flesh, and I looked at it. I could see her knob now, and the red, wet inner flesh and I wished I could just crawl up inside her and love her with my whole body inside her. I bent and touched the knob with my tongue, while I ran my finger along the lips of her pussy. I liked the feel of her shuddering when I made good contacts with my tongue and finger, and she put her knees up and spread her legs wider, and began to beg: 'Kiss and suck it, lover-girl. Kiss my cunt. Love it. Lick it so good!' "When she began to talk like that, I got more turned on than ever, and I really began to shove my tongue in and out, and run my finger up inside her, while I tried to remember the spots that she had hit when she was doing it to me. She tasted good. Sweet. Clean. Perfumy. I began to take little nibbles at her knob, and she would rear up and push her cunt into my mouth and gasp, 'Oh, eat it all, lover! Eat me! Eat me!' "And I did. I could feel her knob jumping when she was coming, and she bucked and raised her ass, moaning and squirming in pleasure. I almost came too, because I was twisting and moving my legs so that the lips of my pussy were rubbing against each other. I know that if I'd have touched my knob with my finger for a minute, I'd have come. But I wanted to wait and have Edna use her mouth and tongue and teeth on me again.
"But, before she did, she showed me something else that really worked me into a lather to come. She had me lay down on my back, and she laid on top of me, carefully fitting the lips of our cunts together. Then, with one hand, she massaged the nipple of my titty, while she kissed me, putting her tongue deep into my throat, while I sucked and tickled it with mine. All the while, she was moving her hips and rotating her fanny, so that I could feel her pussy lips and the folds of flesh rubbing into mine. I tried to spread my legs wider so I could feel it better, but after a certain depth or contact, that was it.
"But the way we were kissing, and the feel of the lips of her pussy on mine really worked me up. Then she began to slide down my body, kissing the nipples of my breasts, playing around the lips of my pussy with her fingers, and even tickling my asshole. She moved down with her mouth, sticking her tongue into my belly button, then moving quickly to my thighs. She didn't touch my cunt with her lips, but licked the inside of my thighs, up high, close to my pussy. She spread my legs and opened my cunt with her fingers, and then she began to stick her tongue inside me, as deep as she could get it. When she would bring it out, she closed her lips on all the inner flesh she could get, and she sucked as hard as she could, with the last contact being made when she sucked my knob.
"I just propped myself up on my elbows, and watched what she was doing. It added a thrill to see her pretty mouth down there, and her tongue going in and out of my cunt, and to see her breasts hanging free, and the curve of her ass. She moved down a little farther, and when she used her tongue, she also licked my asshole, then ended up by digging it into my pussy. I felt as if I could come just from watching her lovely blonde head bobbing up and down, knowing that such a beautiful and luscious woman really wanted to have sex with me.
"I watched her lips, not just to add to my own kicks, but so I would know more about how to please her - and other women, because I knew already that there were going to be other ones. I liked the free and uninhibited feeling of a woman sucking my pussy. Men are willing enough, but they just don't know enough about the way a woman's cunt is constructed inside. They seem to think that all they have to do is to shove their tongues in as far as they will go, and that will eventually make a woman come. It isn't that easy. "A woman knows the other places. She also knows just how much pressure and friction, how much sucking it takes on the knob - I know it's called the clitoris, but I hate fancy, medical, or polite names for things. A fuck is a fuck, even if some people call it intercourse or copulation, or whatever. And I call a clitoris a 'knob,' and it's still the most pleasure-feeling spot on my body, but there are a lot of other places that a tongue or fingers can really reach to turn a girl on.
"And Edna was showing me places that I hadn't dreamed of. Oh, I guess I knew them, but they are hard to reach with your own fingers or any of the gadgets I'd used to masturbate. And Edna also knew how to mix in the asshole punching with the sucking. She knew just how to combine the touching of inside walls with the pressure or suction on my knob, to bring it all out at the same time.
"When she made me come, it felt like my whole lower body, from my tits down, was coming. I tingled all over, and when I put my legs up around her neck and she pulled my cunt even tighter to her mouth, the 'aftercome,' if there is such a word, was almost as good.
"I wanted to do it at the same time, and I asked her if we could. She reversed her body so that her pussy was by my mouth, and mine by hers. It didn't seem to make it any harder for her to reach the right spots inside and outside of my cunt. I tried to take my lead from her, and it worked pretty well, because we both came at the same time. She told me, although she didn't have to. I recognized the throbbing of her knob, and the way she clenched the cheeks of her ass hard around my finger in her asshole.
"But it is good to come at the same instant, and I remembered how she had made it last, and even brought a final, last wave of thrills, and I kept on licking and sucking and I reached for one of her breasts and dug my nails into the nipple - not hard, but enough to excite her more and make the feeling more full.
"That was all we did that night, but we made another date for two nights later, and she told me she would have a surprise for me. She thought it would be a surprise, but it wasn't. She started out by asking me if I knew what a dildo was. I asked Edna if that was a phony prick - I'd heard somebody at school call one that - and she laughed and said it was.
"She asked if I'd ever used one or had one used on me, and I told her all about my girlfriend's fake cock, and how we had tried it. I blurted out also that it wasn't half as good as a real cock inside your cunt, and she looked a little disappointed, but then she thanked me for confiding in her that I had had fucking from a man. She said 'intercourse,' but it didn't matter.
"I told my parents I was staying with Moira, and they seemed relieved to be rid of me. And what a weekend! There were only four of us: Edna and me and these two girls who lived in the same house. It was a nice place, and I was glad to see that they weren't too. much older than Edna. We sat around and had a couple of drinks while we talked. They were both school teachers, but in different schools from where I went.
"They had a big police dog, and he seemed to take to me from the beginning. I petted him, and he licked my hand. When I ruffled the fur along his neck, behind his ears, I noticed that he began to get a hard-on. I was fascinated at the sight of that red cock sticking out of his furry case, but I was a little embarrassed. Then he jumped up, put his paws on my hips and began fucking my leg - and he was really going at it. I pushed him away, but he came at me again.
"June, the older of the two women we were visiting, just laughed and said, 'Rocky needs his nightly treat.' They all laughed at that, but I didn't see anything funny, and June asked me: 'Would you like to see something - different? Exciting?' By then, the scotch was getting me pretty lit up, and I was also getting a little impatient to see just what the hell went on at a Lesbian party, so I said 'Sure.' "June sat down in a chair and called Rocky over. She lifted her skirt -she wasn't wearing any panties - and spread her legs. Her cunt had been shaved, and it was easy to see the wet, red insides of it glistening in the light.
"The dog walked over and she slid down in the chair so that her cunt was on the edge of the chair cushion, and that goddamned dog began licking her cunt! The more he licked, the bigger and harder his red prick stuck out! I don't know what happened to me, but looking at that dog's cock - he was jabbing at the air as if he were fucking another dog - got me all hot. I wanted a prick inside me.
"I noticed that they were all looking at me, and I must have blushed, because they laughed. June said: 'Want to try Rocky?' But I said 'No thanks,' and she slid down farther in the chair and patted her chest, and he put his paws up and tried to hold her around the body, while he jammed that wet, crimson prick into the lips of her cunt. He was only hitting the lips of it - maybe getting inside a half an inch or so, but he was panting and drooling, and pretty soon he shot out a stream of jism, all over her legs and some on her cunt hairs! Then he licked it off, every drop!
"I didn't know what to say or do, so I asked if I could have another drink. Arlene, the younger one, laughed and poured me another scotch and soda. I had to think that one over. That was something else - something I'd never even thought of, although I'd been half turned on by watching dogs fucking when I was younger. In spite of feeling a little disgusted, I was also curious as to how it would feel to have a dog's prick inside my cunt. I didn't want to find out, but I was curious. June hadn't seemed to get any real kick out of it, except for the licking, and I guessed that she had just done it to test me for shock, or to see if I was really ready for the gang bang that was coming up.
"It was my first time with a 'daisy chain,' but they had it all down perfect. I had a ball, really. Edna had broken me in good, so I didn't make a fool of myself. In fact, they were pretty impressed at how much I knew about making a woman come. But I kept thinking about that dog. I wondered if I should ask my father to get me a dog, so I could train him like that.
"They didn't use any dildoes that night, but I came at least five times, and I learned some new positions and a few things about using the teeth. I mean, June squatted over my face while Edna worked on my pussy, and in turn, Arlene was down on Edna. For Arlene to come, she used a hand-operated dildo.
"But, the thing that impressed me was that when June squatted down over my mouth, she wanted me to use my teeth - hard, on her knob. She actually wanted me to nibble and nip the knob, taking it in my teeth. Once I had set my teeth just right, she started a back and forward movement that brought her to a climax inside a minute.
"At the same time, Edna was doing the same thing to me, shoving her finger into my asshole hard and deep. I was surprised at how good it felt, although at the time, I was certain that I must be bleeding - that's how hard she was biting my knob. She was clawing away at my one nipple, and shoving one finger deep into my asshole, and I had no trouble coming.
"We tried a two-tongue deal that night that was exciting, too. Arlene got on her hands and knees, and Edna and I worked on her.
"Meantime, June slid underneath her and kissed and massaged her nipples and kissed her belly button, while I sort of straddled Arlene's back, facing her ass. Edna slid underneath her, facing toward her head, so that she could get at her cunt with her tongue and her fingers. My part was to lick her asshole, and at the end of the stroke, when we could work it, I met Edna's mouth and licked her tongue! Of course, that position did nothing for anyone of the three of us, but it sure got Arlene all the come that she could use.
"Then it was my turn, and I must admit, that was as complete an orgasm as I've ever had. Three women, all working on the most sensitive spots on your body! How could you help but really blow your cork?
"Later on, while Edna sat in the chair so that Arlene could get on her hands and knees, they called Rocky out again, and after he had sniffed at Arlene's ass and cunt, shoved out his red, wet, hard cock, and while Arlene went at Edna's pussy, Rocky did his act. He began by licking, and then he mounted Arlene and started that jabbing at the air again. After a while, he got the tip of it inside her lips and then he went wild, and jabbed as hard as he could, while Arlene tried to shove the Lips of her pussy out so that Rocky could get it in.
"He could only make it in with the tip of his cock, but I began to get hot again, and I watched June, and she began to masturbate with her finger. Suddenly, she came over and got her head down between my legs and began to suck, and do you know? Watching that dog fuck Arlene while she sucked Edna was the best part of the whole night. I just had to ask my father to buy me a dog like that -but I wanted a puppy, so I could work on him and train him.
"I asked them - Arlene and June - how they had trained him that way, and they told me that they had gotten him as a pup, and that in the beginning, they had smeared hamburger and liver over the lips of their cunts and over their assholes. Then, they had masturbated him when he began to sniff at their pussies and assholes, and Arlene said that at one point, she had actually sucked Rocky's cock! I asked her why, and she said that she wanted him to mount her from the front, with her legs open wide, so that her cunt was wide open.
"It didn't work, or at least, it was frustrating for her, although she said that Rocky had shot his load all over her, even when he was jabbing at the air, or only touching her thighs. I had had a lot to drink, and I was pretty brave and mouthy, so I asked Arlene why she didn't just go out and have a man with a big cock, once in a while, at least.
"She was so upset that I was sorry for her. She raved: 'A man? Good God, I'd rather fuck myself, or have a bull, a horse, or a dog shove it into me!' "I think that then and there, I decided that Lesbianism wasn't my bag. Remember, I had had men - and a couple of boys - and I wanted to have them again. I realized that I wasn't half as mixed up and kooky as any of these dames, and I wanted to keep it that way! But, I still toyed with the idea of getting a dog like Rocky. He might just be a good companion for a lot of lonely nights. Not to fuck me - I didn't want that - but to make it more interesting. After all, dogs can't talk.
"That was my 'swan song,' I guess they call it, with all Lesbians. Oh, I've gone to bed with females, but from there on, I knew that at least most of the time, I had to have a man.
"Incidentally, I got my dog. He worked out bad. The dumb sonovabitch would fuck me in the leg, but he wouldn't take a jab at my cunt. Oh, he learned to screw my leg -both legs - but I just couldn't bring myself to jerk a dog off, or to suck his cock - which I believe that Arlene and maybe June did to work Rocky up that way. He was too well-trained - he knew too much for it to have just happened that way.
"I went to two more of the parties that Edna rigged, but I was getting fed up with dames. A guy can do a hell of a lot more, and I had more than enough guys banging at my pussy."
CHAPTER FOUR - "Sex In Living Color"
"I wanted to get back to men, and the chance came much quicker than I figured it would. I guess what I should have said was that I wanted to get back to the bisexual scene. I didn't want to really give up Lesbian sex, but I was getting a little bored with the sameness of it. Besides, I never did like dildoes. I never will. I've seen quite a few, and none of them - nothing can really substitute for a man's cock inside you.
"It happened strangely, because in a way, my mother and father were the ones who got me into the sex orgy bit. Not directly or knowingly, but if they hadn't been tangled up in this wife-swapping bunch, I might never have had a crack at it. That's a funny thing. With all the sex at school, the homos, the Lesbians and the screwers, I never did hear of any real orgies. Oh, I've heard of guys on a date swapping girls after they've fucked them, but I mean the real orgies, where it doesn't matter which you get - a man or a woman.
"Anyhow, one night my father asked me if I'd like to earn five dollars for babysitting. I didn't have any date that night, and it was at the time I was beginning to sour on the Lesbian kick, so I said okay. He told me that he was giving a party that night at our house, and that one of the couples that was coming needed a babysitter for their two kids. It sounded all right to me, so the deal was set.
"I didn't know that the party at our house was one of those swinging things, but I sure learned later. The Masons seemed like nice people. She was a flashy redhead and he was a tall, muscular guy - good-looking in a really rugged way. The kids were a girl who was ten and a boy, a year older. Their names were Elaine and Roger.
"The Masons came over and picked me up. Mrs. Mason stayed on at our house while Dale Mason took me back to get acquainted with the kids and the rules. It was all right. The kids took to me pretty good, and they had a color TV and plenty of goodies in the icebox. I also noticed that they had a nicely stocked bar in the den, so if it got too boring, I could have a few belts of scotch. But I didn't figure I'd have any trouble, and I was going to stay all night and sleep on the studio couch in the den, so I was pretty much on my own. The kids were supposed to go to bed at nine.
"After Dale left, we watched TV for awhile. Then Roger began to get fidgety and restless and said he wanted to take a bath. I thought that was okay, so I told him to go ahead. Then Elaine wanted to take a bath, too, and I told her it was all right after Roger finished, because he'd asked first. Then she told me that she and Roger often took their baths together. I thought it was kind of funny, but, if their parents allowed it, it wasn't up to me to stop them. They hadn't laid down any rules about that.
"After they had drawn the tub and got in, it was quiet for a while, but then a lot of giggling and shouting and squealing started, so I thought I'd better see what they were up to. I went into the bathroom - they hadn't even shut the door -and was I surprised! There was Roger, standing up in the tub, with his little pecker hard and stiff, and Elaine was patting it with her hand, from one side to the other, giggling and squealing, while Roger was taking swipes at her pussy with his wet toe!
"I just stood there, and they were too busy to notice me. Then Elaine leaned forward and took his prick in her mouth, and I knew by the way she sucked it that she'd had a lot of practice at it. He had a pretty good-sized cock for a kid of 11, and she really gobbled it and sucked it.
"I honestly didn't know what to say or do, but I was fascinated at these two hot little bastards going at each other that way. Roger was holding Elaine by the back of the head now, plunging his cock into her mouth faster and faster, and he began to say, 'Faster, Lainie, faster, faster.' I didn't know whether he could shoot any juice into her mouth, but I know by the motions that he sure came!
"Another thing that I knew for sure was that I was getting pretty hot watching that little sex show. But I still didn't know how to bust in on them, so I backed away quietly, then when I was halfway down the hall, I called their names, asking them if they needed anything. Roger hollered back in a sarcastic tone: 'Yeah, you can dry my back!' "I walked in, expecting that he would at least be out of the tub, and maybe have his back to me, but I'll be damned if he wasn't standing there with his pecker still waving around in the air. Worse yet, he was laughing at me. I guess my mouth must have dropped open, because Elaine began giggling, too. "Roger said, 'Aw, c'mon, Savvy, you've seen 'em a lot bigger'n mine, I bet!' Elaine giggled louder than ever at that.
"'What have you been doing to get hard like that?' I shouted at him, trying to act madder than I. really felt. He just pointed to his sister and said, 'She's been playin' with it and kissing it.' Before I could say anything, he added, 'We do that a lot of times. It's fun. It don't hurt nothin'.' "All I could think of to say was, 'What would your mother and father say?' "Roger blurted out, 'They do it, too. You wanna see?' I couldn't figure out what he could mean, and while I was thinking about it, he explained. 'You wanna see some pictures of 'em?' "I still didn't answer, so he stepped out of the tub and ran into his parents' bedroom, stark naked. I walked after him and watched him rummaging around in the bottom of a drawer. He came up with a big, brown envelope and he handed it to me. 'Go ahead, look at 'em.' "I walked back into the living room and sat down by a lamp. When I pulled out the pictures, I knew why Roger and Elaine thought what they were doing was 'kid stuff,' compared to what the pictures showed their parents were going in for.
"They were Polaroid shots - and they were in color and featured a hell of a lot of others besides the Masons. And I thought that I knew all the positions and ways! Man, they had some things worked out that turned me on just to look at them. But the real surprise was when I came across a couple of sexpots that I knew! My mother and father!
"I hadn't noticed the kids come out of the bathroom, but there they were, looking over my shoulder, snickering when certain scenes would come up. Then Roger volunteered: 'My dad's got some movies of that kind of stuff, too. We sneaked out and watched one night when they were looking at 'em.' "Those pictures got me hotter than hell, and I had even begun to wonder if Roger's cock was big enough to do me any good, if I could coax him to put it into my pussy. I also wondered if he knew anything about eating pussy. I needed something, and I didn't want to just masturbate, if there was a chance for something even close to a fucking or sucking.
"I put the pictures down and told Elaine it was time for bed. She whined a little, but I told her she had to go, so after I dried her hair and gave her a glass of milk, she went into her bedroom. She had a little radio that she said her parents allowed her to have on until she fell asleep, so I let her do it. I sneaked in about ten minutes later and she was sound asleep, so I turned it off and closed her door.
"Roger had been watching TV all the time, still stark naked, although he had dried himself and his prick had shrunk back to the size of a peanut.
"I picked up the pictures and started going through them again, and pretty soon, he shut off the TV and came over and sat beside me on the couch.
"I took one picture of his mother sucking his father's cock, while another man mounted her from the back - I couldn't tell if he had his prick in her cunt or up her asshole - but it had caught her just as she was pulling her mouth back over the head of Dale's cock, and it showed that he had a real dinger of a prick. It was big around, and long, and it turned me on.
"I said to Roger: 'Your dad has a real nice prick. I wonder if yours will get like that?' And as I said that, I reached over and put my fingers around his little cock and started to jerk it. Not hard, but I let my fingers peel back the skin, back and forth, letting the red head of it jump out, and in a minute, it began to get stiff.
"It wasn't big enough, I knew now, to go far enough into my cunt to do me any good, so I tried the other way. I asked him if Elaine ever took his cock in her mouth. Of course, I already knew she did, but I wanted to hear him say it. He said, 'Sure. Lots of times - and so does my cousin, Rachel. She's 12.' "I found another picture where a woman whose face I couldn't see was spread out on the floor, pillows under her ass, with her legs spread wide and a man - it looked like my father - was down eating her pussy, with a finger up her ass.
"I asked Roger if he ever did that to Elaine, and he said that he had, but she didn't like it much. But his cousin did!
"I asked him if he liked to do it. 'It's all right, if she does it for me,' he answered.
"All the time we'd been talking, I was playing with his pecker, and I could tell that he liked it. I asked him if he would like to do that to me, and he came right back with: 'Will you suck mine?' I told him I wanted to, and I just slid off the couch and knelt down in front of him and took it in my mouth.
"It was a kick, teasing the head of it with my lips and tongue, seeing and feeling him get all wound up tight. Then I really let him have it. It was small enough so that I could really plunge my mouth down over it all the way, and it didn't gag me because it didn't reach far enough. And when I began to really gobble it, sucking it hard on both the up and down strokes, he really began to buck and jump. I reached underneath his balls and shoved the tip of my finger up his ass and began to push it in and out, and that really drove him out of his little skull.
"He came, but I was disappointed that there was no juice. Maybe there was a trickle, but I was concentrating too hard on giving him the blow job of his life, to really be sure. But he sure got the same sensation, juice or not.
"I let him go, and I took off my panties and laid down on the couch. When I spread my legs, I thought his eyes would pop out. He blurted out, 'Jeez, what a lot of hair.' I really didn't have so much, but I supposed that he was used to seeing his cousin's cunt, and at 12, she wouldn't have much at all.
"But he crawled down between my legs, and I put my knees up and spread them as wide as I could, to make it easier for him to get his tongue in as far as he could. I was surprised when he went right for my knob, but I supposed again that Rachel had told him that that was the spot that felt the best when he tickled it. I told him to shove his fingers up deep inside me, and he did. He was awkward and he dug his nails into me, but it really felt good. I pulled his head down and sort of positioned his tongue on my knob, and moved his head up and down to show him the right spots, and pretty soon he was doing just fine.
"It took a little longer than usual, but I came real good. I was surprised when I looked down and saw that his little rod was hard again, and I drew him up on top of me, and guided it inside my pussy. I was surprised that it did touch my knob, and he began to pump away like a little rabbit. I guessed that he'd tried that on his cousin, also. He was going like crazy, and before I could really get with it, he jumped and jabbed and had his little 'come,' and I was left high and dry. But he was a cooperative little beaver, and when I asked him to 'do me again,' he went right down on me and worked away until I came again.
"I asked him if that was his first fuck, and he grinned a little and said he had tried it with his cousin, but he didn't think he had really gotten it inside her, because she said she couldn't feel anything. I played with his prick a little more, then I went down on it again. He was getting sleepy after that, so I tucked him in, checked on Elaine, and then went out and had a good stiff belt of booze.
"It had been some night - a hell of a lot more fun than I'd thought it would be when I took the job. I looked at the pictures some more, had another drink, and then I got that one that showed Mr. Mason's big, fat cock clearly, and I masturbated while I imagined that Dale Mason was fucking me.
"After that, I sorted out the ones where I could recognize my mother and father, and I just sat there, shaking my head at what a swinging, sexy pair they were. I even wondered what it would be like to have my old man suck my cunt, or maybe fuck me. He wasn't hung too bad at that, and some of those women really went for him.
"I kept drinking, and I didn't realize how sleepy I was getting. The next thing I knew, I heard the living room door open and there were the Masons. He looked surprised, but she looked like a warrior when she saw the pictures that I'd been looking at.
"She walked over and grabbed them and began stuffing them into the envelope. 'You little snoop!' she yelled. 'You ought to be ashamed of yourself!' "That struck me funny and I laughed at her. 'Me? Me? I should be ashamed? Now, why should I be ashamed to be looking at such works of art?
"Then I got mad when she still stood there, glaring at me as if I was garbage. I stood up and really told her off! I yelled, 'You goddamned slut! You filthy, fucking bitch! Don't you lecture me - and don't you threaten to tell my parents, because they're as fuck-silly as you two are.' I shouldn't have, but I had to get in the real dig, so I said: 'And as fuck and suck crazy as your two weirdo kids are! Or didn't you know that they play the same kind of games as you do?' "For a second, I thought she was going to slap me, but then Dale Mason came over and took the pictures and shoved her back a little. 'All right, Jean, knock it off. After all, it isn't our place to be bawling her out. We shouldn't have left the pictures where she could find them.' "I told him, 'I didn't snoop and find your pictures - Roger got them and showed them to me!' That shook the both of them up pretty good. I really felt sorry for them, they looked so hurt and scared.
"Oh, don't act like it's the end of the world,' I told them. 'Lots of kids that age fool around. It doesn't mean anything. They're good kids. They'll be all right.' Jean grabbed the pictures and headed for the back of the house where the bedrooms were. I heard her checking on both of the kids, and I felt kind of awkward, standing there looking at the man whose naked cock in a picture had been inside my cunt - in my fantasy - just a short time before. He felt funny, too, because he came out with a shit-eating grin and said, 'Well, Savvy, you've had quite an evening. I mean - well - did the pictures upset you? I really didn't intend - "I cut in and laughed as I said, 'Upset me? You've got to be kidding! I got quite an education. I thought I knew a lot about sex, but, brother-!' "He shuffled around, nervous-like, and said, 'Well, I mean, I hope you won't let your mother and father know - "I told him not to worry about that. He said that the party at my house had broken up earlier than they had expected, because two couples couldn't make it, and he asked me if I wanted to go home instead of staying all night, because it was only one o'clock.
"I told him it might be best, because his wife, Jean, was pretty upset, but he told me not to mind her. She'd get over it in a few minutes. I thought that the cat was pretty well out of the bag anyhow, so I asked him if it was all right if I had a drink. He was surprised, but he poured me a scotch and soda, and he poured two more. He set Jean's down on the bar and drank his pretty fast.
"Jean came back into the room and he handed her her drink. She looked a little less mad, but she didn't seem to know just what to say to me. I said, 'Don't feel so guilty - after all, my mother and father are on the same kick.' "Finally, she asked: 'What did you mean about the kids?' "I told her about the bath, but not about the cock-sucking-just that they were fooling around, and when I asked Roger about it, he had told me that he fooled with his sister some, but mostly with his cousin, Rachel. I told her that when I had bawled Roger out, that he had gotten the pictures.
"I didn't tell her about Roger and me. I didn't see any point in making it any worse than it was. But I didn't know Roger and his big mouth!
"It ended up by Jean driving me home. I guess she didn't trust her husband, even after all the sex that they must have had at the brawl at my house. I was surprised when they called me the next day and asked me if I'd come over to their house that night. They said they wanted to talk to me. I didn't see any reason why I shouldn't, but I expected the kids to be there. When I got there - my dad drove me - I found that the kids were at their grandmother's, across town.
"First, Dale offered me a drink. They were both pretty mellow on booze, and they seemed in a lot better mood than they had been the night before, so I relaxed and joined them.
"Out of a clear sky, Jean asked me how it had been to suck Roger's cock, and to have him fuck me!
o "I guessed right away that Roger had panicked when they had asked him about the pictures, and he'd blabbed the whole deal. But I had to brazen it out then. What in hell could they do about it anyhow?
"I looked her right in the eye and told her it was all right, but I liked older boys with bigger cocks a hell of a lot better. She came right back and asked if I'd seen any in the pictures I'd looked at that appealed to me, so I played it as cool as she was trying to and told her, 'Yes, Mr. Mason's looked pretty interesting.' "It was right then that I felt like I really earned my name: 'Savvy.' Jean said, 'You're a real savvy kid. You know more about sex at 15 than I know at 33. So, why not join the party - Savvy?' "Dale spoke up. He said, 'I thought we'd better ask you if you had ever fooled around with women, kiddo. Or, if you'd have any objections to it.' "That was a laugh, when I'd probably sucked as many different pussies as he had - or at least, it seemed that way to me. Remember, I told you I'd been getting bored with it, but I'd thought a lot about those pictures, and maybe the mixed parties would add kicks to it. I know I got extra hot, looking at several persons all tangled up, cunt-licking, fucking, sucking, masturbating and asshole punching, and I was ready.
"I just raised my glass and smiled and said, 'It's your party.' "Dale said he'd get the camera ready, and meanwhile, why didn't the two of us get undressed. I poured another good belt of booze and stripped. I watched Jean, and she had a body like a teenager. I was surprised to see that she had real red hair around her pussy -I hadn't paid that much attention when I had looked at the pictures. She had nice breasts, too - especially for a woman who had had two kids and been married as long as she must have been.
"I noticed that she eyed me up pretty good, too. She came over to me when I was naked and put a hand on my breast and said, 'You've sure got a beautiful shape, Savvy. I'm going to enjoy kissing those breasts and that pretty little box.' "Dale came back with the Polaroid, and he had stripped naked, too. His prick wasn't round and stiff like it had been in the pictures, but when he looked at his wife and I standing there in the nude, with her still massaging my breast, it began to show signs of getting there.
"He grinned and asked, 'Well, what and who is first?' "Jean spoke up and said, 'Why don't you two go first, Dale, and I'll get some pictures. I'll bet that with all she knows about the game, that Savvy has never had a picture taken of her doing it - any position - or even naked. Have you?' "I shook my head, watching that cock of Dale's stiffen by the second. He walked over to me, bent his head and nibbled one of my nipples, then he put his hands around my ass and pulled me close to him and kissed me. He was rubbing that steadily growing prick into the lips of my cunt, and he began to shove his tongue in and out of my mouth, and I really began to turn-on when I felt that cock getting really big and mean. Man!
"He asked me, 'What's your favorite, Savvy?' I told him for a starter, I'd go for a good old-fashioned fuck.
"I guess I wanted to shock them, but instead, it seemed to please them, because they exchanged glances and smiled. And Dale grabbed me by a nipple, real cute-like, and pulled me over to the couch. He let go, but pushed me lightly so that I flopped down. I deliberately spread my legs, thinking that I could play the game as well as they were. Dale looked down at me, then walked back and brought my drink over, along with his own.
"He handed me the drink and I sipped, just staring at his prick. He was looking me up and down, especially my pussy, and he asked: 'No play beforehand? No kissing, or anything?' "I told him it was his party, so he set his drink on a table and knelt down between my knees. He began to nip at the inside of my thighs, working up toward my pussy, and meantime, he was digging his fingers into each of my breasts, hard. But it did excite me, and just as he put his mouth to the lips of my cunt, Jean snapped the first picture.
"Dale slid his hands up underneath my ass and pulled me down so that my cunt was easier to get at, and then he really began to eat me. I mean - eat! He bit and nibbled. It hurt, for a minute, but it sure turned me on. I could actually look down and watch him take my knob and the lips of my pussy in his teeth. He would suck, but at the same time, he bit, and when he let go, I could see the flesh from the inside of my cunt spring back inside me. And did I ever get hot. He knew I would because he kept spreading my legs wider and wider, and all at once, he rammed his tongue into me as far as most guys could ram a cock!
"It was timed just right, and I just grabbed the back of his head and pulled him in tight. And Jean snapped another picture. I knew I couldn't wait much longer, even if I was the one that had said I wanted an old-fashioned fuck to start, so I pushed his head away, lay back on the couch and dragged him up. Not that he wasn't willing, but he lingered for just a second - long enough to ram his tongue about an inch into my asshole, and turn me on even more.
"Jean called from the bar: 'Hurry up, you two - I want to have some fun, too!' And, as he was poised over my spread cunt-lips, his prick in his hand, she snapped another picture. All at once, I wanted another picture. I wanted a picture for myself, of me with his cock in my mouth!
"I pushed him back -the booze was beginning to get to me by then - and he was off balance and fell partly on his back, with his lovely cock waving in the air. I just went down on it, and he still had the base of it in his hands, and as I gobbled it, he stuck his finger in my mouth and worked it around. Jean must have known what I wanted, because she snapped two more shots of us. I was wild. I was glad. I was free! I had everything I ever wanted: the good feeling of sex and the high, mellow feel that booze always gave me.
"I sucked until he pushed me away. He didn't want to come in my mouth. He wanted to shove that prick as deep into my cunt as he could, and, to tell the truth, I wanted that, too. I lay back, and spread my legs, and this time, he didn't even take one lick at my pussy or my asshole. He just drove it home. I swear, he must have aimed it from four inches away and then just rammed it into me, and I nearly flipped. It hurt, but a good kind of hurt. I reached down and opened the lips of my cunt with my fingers, and I could feel the wet stuff inside me taking care of his sliding it in, but good!
"I was vaguely aware of the flashes going off as Jean took pictures of us, but I was too wrapped up in the wild fuck that I was getting from her husband to really notice much. Dale was something else. He was the best. I mean - the best. I didn't realize what an added kick it was to have somebody else watching; seeing how you handled a man, how you pleased him, and how he aroused and satisfied you. For a second, I was jealous of Jean, but I had the thought in the back of my mind that I could have Dale any time - and if not him, there must be hundreds of other guys that were as good or better than he was at fucking and sucking.
"He had raised my ass up high, holding me a good eight inches off the couch, while he rammed his prick into me. It made it hard for me to really put any 'oomph' into it, but he was doing fine by himself, so I just looked into his eyes. I liked the lust -the desire -the wanting - that I could see there. He looked right back at me, pumping away, and I wrapped my legs around him as best I could, and that was the way we came. I was glad that his wife got a lot of pictures, and she kept peeling them off -the way you have to do with Polaroid shots - because I could hardly wait to see them.
"I was conscious that while she was watching us, she had a finger working pretty good in her own snatch. I could also see that the nipples on her pretty breasts were sticking out as hard and stiff as a man's prick when he's got a hard-on. I guess, in a way, I was looking forward to some sex with her, too. This was all different - all new, and I was having a ball.
"I was torn between wanting Dale to keep on fucking me, and wanting Jean to get into the act, but she settled it. When she watched us both come - and there couldn't be any doubt, because we were bucking and rearing all over the couch and even half off it - she just plopped the camera down and came over and began to kiss my titties. She was moaning like her husband was, and she actually pushed him away and got down between my legs and sucked all the jism that her husband, Dale, had just shot up into my cunt!
"He was a cool one. He walked over, with his wet, slimy cock still standing out proudly, and grabbed the camera and took some shots of Jean sucking his come out of my cunt. I guess I'm a ham, but that camera seemed to turn me on. I just wanted to loosen up, to do something wild, or dirty, or extra sexy, while they took pictures. I wanted to have pictures of me sucking Dale Mason off, and then going down on Jean, and with him fucking the shit out of me. I even wanted a picture of him - and the feel of him - shoving it up my asshole! I tell you, I was wild!
"I didn't come while Jean was sucking my box, but I didn't want to, and she wanted it better than that, too. She called to Dale to put the camera down and get in on the action, and I was ready for anything they had to offer, so long as it was new. Then Jean asked me if there was anything in the pictures I'd looked at that appealed to me especially. I thought for a moment, then I told her that I would like to try the position where she was underneath me, sucking my cunt, while I was on my hands and knees, and Dale was in back of me.
"I didn't really know if he would be cornholing me up my asshole, or if he would be shoving his cock into my cunt so that it hit all the deep spots while Jean took care of my knob with her tongue. But either way, it had turned me on when I saw a couple of pictures of it. Besides, all three of the people in the picture - my mother was the cuntlapper - seemed to be really gone - real gone!
"Jean said: 'I'm tickled that you asked for that. Savvy, because I've wanted to suck that cunt of yours all the way from the first time I saw you, two years ago!' That made me feel good - in fact, I almost told her to get down with her cunt to my face and let us both suck the living hell out of each other, because I wanted to suck hers, too, since I first got a look at it.
"But, instead, she laid down on the floor on her back and motioned me over. I knelt over her face, so that she could reach up and either grab my ass cheeks or play with my nipples - I'd seen both in the pictures - or just concentrate on sucking my cunt. Dale came over. He didn't need to masturbate or play with either of our cunts to get his hard back. It was as big and stiff and round as when he started! I remember wondering if I could take it, if he decided to shove it up my ass, but I didn't have to worry. He wanted to shove it up my snatch!
"Man, what a fuck that was. You'd never believe, unless you've had it that way, what a full, thrilling, turned-on fuck that can be. What really made it special was that I could feel the both of them: his prick and her tongue, inside me!
"We tried other ways that night: like, with Jean and I doing a sixty-nine - that's both of us sucking each other's cunt - and while I was up on a pillow, or on my hands and knees, Dale fucked me from behind. Not up the ass! In the pussy. And we tried a straight daisy chain, where I sucked Dale's cock, while Jean was gobbling me, and Dale, in turn, was giving her pussy a suck job.
"I was so excited, I wanted it to go on forever. There were a lot of ways that I wanted to try out. But, they said there would be a lot of other nights, and they told me that they belonged to another club than the one my mother and father were part of - a more exciting club. I didn't see how it could be any more kicky, but they raved about how much I would like it, and we even set a date when I would be their guest.
"We topped the evening off with a real kick - for me, at least. Dale and I were doing a sixty-nine job, and I was on top. While I was sucking the hell out of his nice, fat cock, Jean took some pictures, then she came over and stuck her tongue in my asshole. It might not sound like much, but just remember, all this was new to me - kicks I'd never had, and to make it even more exciting, they kept talking about this club and how different and more exciting it was.
"When they took me home that night, Jean sat in the front seat with me, and she kept finger-fucking me all the way, while she was kissing me, sticking her tongue down my throat while I sucked hers. All the while, I was playing with Dale's prick. It was out of his pants, and I made him come in my hand, while Jean and I were busy. I was trying to masturbate her with my other hand, but she didn't come. But I didn't worry about it, because I knew that they would take good care of each other, either on the way home, or after they got there.
"It was so exciting for me. I was so wound up that I had to masturbate when I got home. I laid there in my bed, recalling all the positions, the sensations, and I came real good using my own fingers.
"And - it was that night that my father first fucked me! They had been out somewhere, watching some home movies, and I assume it was pretty sexy, because while I was in bed, after I'd masturbated twice - they came home. I guess my mother was pretty loaded, because she just stuck her head in the door and said goodnight, and I could hear her stumbling around the bedroom, and then I heard her snore. My dad was in the bathroom, doing something - I know now that it was deliberate, until my mother got out of the way, and then he came into my room. He was cold-assed naked! And he had the biggest hard-on you ever saw!
"He didn't put on any big show: he just walked over and threw the covers off me. I was naked, and I didn't pretend that I was asleep. He blurted out: 'What did the Masons want?' I told him that I'd discovered some pictures taken at the parties he'd been at, and they wanted to know what I thought of them.
"He just said, 'Well-?' So, I said they had turned me on, and that we had had a ball.
"I could see his prick getting even harder, and he kept running his hand down it, almost as if he were jerking off, and I began to get hot. Oh, I thought about that word: incest, but I was still a little loaded from the booze, and his cock looked interesting and ready, so I thought: 'What the hell! A stiff prick and a hot cunt have no conscience.' "He was moving closer to me all the time, and he suddenly leaned down and kissed me - but it wasn't any fatherly kiss, I'll tell you. He put his hand between my legs, and he ran his middle finger up my cunt as far as it would go, while he shoved his tongue in my mouth. I sucked tongues with him, and I was surprised at how turned on I got, thinking of him performing in all those candid pics I'd seen. I reached out and took his cock in my hand, and I drew him closer to my face. He seemed helpless, and it gave me a good feeling - like I told you before - I felt like a grown woman, boss of the ranch!
"When I put his cock in my mouth and started sucking it, he went to pieces. I could feel his body shaking. I knew he was going through hell about the incest bit, but I was too hot for him by then to stop. I just sucked and toyed with it, and I reached out and enclosed his balls in my hand and massaged them. He shot a big load into my mouth inside two minutes, and I drained every drop of jism and swallowed it. I ended up by cleaning out the little hole in the end of his prick with the tip of my tongue.
"He never lost his hard. I knew that I was in command, so I just said, 'Fuck me, Daddy - fuck me hard and good, like you never fucked Mom!' "He took a quick lick at my cunt, but then he put his hands on my breasts and let me guide his cock into me. He stayed that way all during our wild, bucking, fucking fuck, but he was kissing the hell out of my mouth, sucking tongues - and I tell you - he was better than the best. I remember thinking that I wished my mom could see it. I wished that both of them could be at the party I was going to with the Masons. I even wondered how it would be if I were to have my mom go down on me, and me gobble her pussy!
"But Dad pulled his cock out in a guilty way, and I knew he was thinking about me getting pregnant. I still had my prescription for the pills, and I told him not to worry, that I was all taken care of with the birth control pills. It shook him a little, but he didn't say anything. I hadn't come, but I was on the verge, and he nestled his face down between my legs and went to work with his tongue and his fingers - in my twat and in my asshole, and he really knew all the spots!
"We spent almost all night together. He fucked me from the rear - dog fashion, - first in my pussy, then in my ass. While he was shoving it up my ass, he masturbated me, digging his nails into my knob so good that I came before he did!
"I thought that that was the big point of my life. I knew for sure that I was all woman - at 15! Besides, there was a feeling of being the best in the world, to think that I had even made my old man want me, and actually fuck and suck me.
"Later, I looked back and realized that he would have fucked a snake - if somebody had held it still!"
CHAPTER FIVE - "Sex And The Sadists"
"Things changed fast after that night. Once the cat was out of the bag about my sex life - I mean, once my old man knew that now I was called Savvy for a damned good reason, I really let go. I had no worries about either of them doing anything to control me, because I had enough on both of them to make a judge turn white, if I blew the whistle.
"But, I hit a kind of low spot. I went to a couple of parties at the Mason's and with them, but the same kicks just didn't come. I began to think that maybe I should go back to fucking with kids my own age. They were a little on the square side, but they didn't take it as casually as the adults seemed to. Once the old guys got a taste of sex, it seemed to become routine with them, no matter what position they tried.
"I did find out one thing, though - that sex is better when there are people watching. The next best thing is to have pictures taken while you're doing it. The more I got to thinking about that angle, the more I wanted to try it on my own.
"I worked on my old man for a good movie camera, and also a Polaroid that took color pictures. I picked up on Moira, and I found that she'd been having a lot of sex, but it was all with two or three guys - and no orgies at all. I showed her a couple of pictures that the Masons had given me, and she flipped over the idea. And I found out that she had been trying something that I didn't know anything about: 'Pot.' "It was kind of cute, the way she asked me about it. She asked: 'Have you gone pottie, yet?' That's a thing that most parents say to little kids, when they are talking about pissing or taking a crap. But I knew that she was talking about marijuana, because a lot of the kids at school were spouting off about it.
"To be honest, I had never needed anything to turn me on, and I sure as hell didn't want to escape from all the fun that I'd been having. Besides, I'd become a pretty good boozer, and if I needed to relax or get rid of a case of nerves or boredom, I found that scotch did a good job.
"But Moira told me that the only way that she knew of to take any pictures of a whole bunch at the same place, was to join one of the 'pot parties' that were going on all the time. She'd smoked it a couple of times, but always with just one guy. She said that it really 'sent' her, but she had been afraid to go to one of the parties because she had heard that the cops were wise to what was going on and were watching some of the older kids pretty close, trying to pick up on one of the parties and grab whoever was handling the stuff.
"I told her I could arrange it at my place. I knew that I could talk my old man into going away for a weekend or at least staying out all night, so we planned it that way. Moira got pretty hot just looking at the pictures I showed her, and hearing me tell about how it was at the orgies. She told me that she had been wondering how it was with girls, and I told her it was all right. Remember, when we'd fooled with that dumb dildo that she rigged up, we had never gone down on each other, though we had been close.
"I asked her if she wanted to try it and we did. She was hot as hell and came after I'd licked her knob and ran my finger up her cunt for less than a minute. When she went down on me, she was awkward at first, but then she got the hang of it when I helped guide her tongue and finger to the right place in my snatch. She learned fast, because she thought of nipping my knob with her teeth, and that always did help me come better. Then we tried it once in the sixty-nine position and we both came close to the same instant.
"She was pretty good, and she said she liked it, but, like me, she thought it was better with a man doing it with his prick. I told her that she hadn't really lived until she was having it with two or three others at the same time, or watching others do it while somebody was working on all the hot spots on your body. She was pretty excited about the party we were going to have, but I told her to be sure she could trust everyone she invited, because I didn't want to get into trouble with the fuzz - especially since I didn't use marijuana myself.
"It was easy to work it with my old man. I called him at work one morning and told him that Mom was downtown for a day's shopping with a friend, and that I wanted him to come home and have some fun with me. He started to beg off, saying that he had thought about what we'd done and it wasn't right. I told him that whether it was or not, I was hot for him, and that he had better take care of me or I'd find somebody else. He agreed to go home and I told them I was sick and went home.
"I was there before he was, and I stripped and took a shower. In a way, I was pretty excited about having it with my old man again. He'd been pretty exciting, and he did know how to reach all the spots. I guess that maybe the 'forbidden fruit' idea turned me on even more.
"When he came home, he looked a little guilty, but when he walked in and I stood there with a glass of scotch for him and one for me, and he got a look at my boobies and my cunt, he began to drool over me, just like any other man would. I gave him a good kiss when I handed him his drink, and he couldn't resist kissing my nipples, then grabbing at my snatch with his fingers. I helped him undress, and we went at it right in the living room.
"I sucked him off, first, while he was playing with my titties, and I kept on until his prick was as hard as when he started. Then I told him I wanted to be fucked 'doggie,' and I got on my hands and knees on the couch and he mounted me from the rear. I knew that it would really turn him on, being able to look down and watch his donger going into my box, and at the same time, be able to stare at my asshole while he shoved a finger up inside it.
"I had learned to like it that way, because when a guy has a big cock, like my dad has, it goes in a lot deeper from the back, and it doesn't hurt. The disadvantage of that way is that it doesn't get your knob quite as much, but with the asshole fingering, and the other hard-to-reach places inside your pussy being touched, it works out good. And, my father knew all those things, because he skipped the asshole punching and reached around and fingered my knob while he plunged his cock into me. He also fingered my nipples, using his fingernails, and that really turned me on.
"After we came that way, we had one more round, with me straddling him, facing him as he sat on a low kitchen chair. I had to do a lot of the action, but he helped by putting his hands under my ass. It was a kick to look into his eyes and see how much he was enjoying me - how much I turned him on. And when he came, he really had a look like a wild animal. He was pumping away, arching his back to get his cock farther up inside me, and we had perfect contact.
"We came at the same second, and he relaxed and grabbed me and we sucked tongues until we were both ready for another one. But this time, we just did it the old-fashioned way, and he really made me get my rocks off.
"While we were getting dressed, I told him about the party I wanted to give, and he didn't object much. I didn't tell him about the marijuana, of course, and he said he'd work something out with my mother so that I could have the house to myself all of Friday night and until late Saturday afternoon. He was more concerned about my boozing than he seemed to be about the sex, and he asked me to take it easy with the booze.
"To be honest, I was pretty let-down with the marijuana and with the kooks that used it. If this was their idea of being turned on, I felt sorry for them.
"There were eight of us, four boys and four girls. The girls were all about my age, but the guys were all older -two of them were in college. One of them had the 'stuff,' and they didn't even have a drink before passing around the pot. I told them I'd never 'turned on' with it, but they just laughed and told me to light up and to inhale deeply on every puff, and to breathe deeply of all the fumes in the room. I had never smoked, so it didn't taste good to me. I choked a little, but I kept at it.
"I got a funny glow, but I didn't like it any more than the good, relaxed feeling from a few belts of scotch. I think it made me loosen up and get a little sexy, because I could see that Tom, the college guy who had brought the pot, had a hard-on shaping up inside his pants, and I remember that I wondered when he was going to get with it and take it out so I could see how he was hung.
"Moira was the one that got it going. She was on her second 'stick,' when she started getting undressed. Tom and the other older guy started helping her, taking off her bra and then her panties. Then the other girls began to strip and one of them dragged Tom off toward the bedroom. I stopped them and told them we were going to try something different - a sex orgy where we all watched and all joined in. They all went for the idea, but they didn't know much about what to do, so I sort of acted as guide.
"I liked the looks of the cock on this Tom, so I told him and Moira that the three of us would start it off. I positioned Moira on the couch with her pussy near the edge, and I got down on my hands and knees and told Tom to fuck me from the back. When he finally got it in good, I went down on Moira. I had to show him how to reach around and play with my knob while he was pumping away, but Moira cooperated pretty good. She moved in close, spread her legs wide and partially wrapped her legs around my neck. I guess that when Tom found that he had a good view of me licking Moira's cunt and shoving a finger up to get to the other spots inside her, it turned him on good, because he got with it and gave me a good humping.
"Moira came before Tom did, and I was a second or two behind him. When we untangled, I noticed that the others had been really taking it all in and that two of the guys were already lining up with one of the girls. One was going to give her a straight fuck while she sucked the other one's cock. I wanted to get some pictures, so I went to get the cameras. I took a couple of Polaroid shots of the two guys and a girl, and Moira and the other girl were getting lined up for a daisy chain with the other two guys, so I took a few shots of them.
"I noticed that within an hour, the rest of them began to goof off - one of the girls, who had been smoking pot steadily, flaked out on the floor and one of the guys was sitting beside her, smoking pot and trying to arouse her by sticking his fingers up her cunt and squeezing her knob. He didn't seem to really care whether he made it or not, and I began to think that this pot kick was for the birds, as far as pepping anyone up for sex. I got myself a couple of good stiff scotches and sodas, and after I began to feel good from the booze, I didn't even like the heavy odor of the marijuana in the room.
"I finally got them all to pay attention - except the girl on the floor - and told them we ought to knock off for a while and have something to eat. I'd fixed a lot of sandwiches but they didn't seem to have much of an appetite. Instead, Tom had passed around some more pot, and they were all puffing up a storm. They perked up a little and began to try some different combinations, but the action had slowed down. Moira seemed the only one that was really interested in sex, and she didn't use much pot. She even tried to rouse the girl on the floor by going down on her and raking her nipples with her fingernails while she licked her cunt, but the dumb dame on the floor just kept moaning 'Fuck me, Al, fuck me,' and rolling around in a stupor.
"Moira told me that it was her first try at marijuana, but she had brought her along because the kid had been bugging her to get her into one of the pot parties.
"By two o'clock in the morning, everybody was flaked out somewhere except me and a guy named Joe. He had knocked off the pot and had been belting away at the scotch. He wasn't a bad-looking guy, but he didn't know a hell of a lot about fucking and I had noticed that he was the only one of the guys who had ended up in any formation sucking another guy off. He hadn't acted as if he had known much about it, and I had gotten some pictures of it, but he was the only one that was still able to offer any fun, so I went to work on him.
"I showed him the stool position that I'd used with my father, and I came, but he couldn't. I went down on him and made him come in my mouth, and he tried to sixty-nine with me, but he fell asleep in the middle of it, so I got disgusted with the whole goddamned bunch. I made up my mind that pot wasn't for me, and also, that even if most kids thought the adults were square, they still knew more about 'fun sex' than any of the older kids, even with their pot turn-on.
"Around eight o'clock, they began to stir, and by ten, they were leaving. They all acted as if they had bad tastes in their mouths, but I didn't know if it was from the sex or the pot. I felt pretty good, but I had showered early and cleaned up the house a little while they were still flaked out. But as he was leaving, Tom asked me if I'd like to go to a party on Sunday. I told him that I didn't think pot was my dish, but he said that this would be a different kick, so I told him I'd go with him. He was a sophomore in college, and of the bunch that had been there, I liked him the best. He had a nice, big prick, and I thought that, without that damned pot to slow him down, he'd be pretty good - especially at the mixed sex bit.
"I had to air out the house to get that heavy, sickish smell of pot out of it. I didn't get many movies, but I took three rolls of Polaroid shots and some of them were pretty good. I decided I would take the ones of Tom to the party and let him see them. It turned out that they were pretty mild stuff.
"Tom picked me up at the house and headed toward the beach. He told me that the party was at a beach house that the parents of one of his girlfriends owned, and that it was different, because it was sort of a special sex club. He told me that he had only been to one gathering with the members, but that he was sure that I'd get a real kick out of it.
"Kick was right. I had never stopped to think about the extra kick I got out of being sucked or fucked when somebody was digging their nails into my breasts or into the soft parts inside my cunt. I doubt if I even knew what the word masochism meant, and even though I was aware of sadism, I surely hadn't tied it in with myself or any sex partner in my thinking.
"I'm no expert, but I think that everybody likes to be hurt a little. I always liked to have somebody nip my knob with their teeth, or dig their fingernails into my nipples or into the flesh inside my cunt. Even when I was just starting to 'neck,' I used to like a guy to bite my ear and neck - sometimes, so hard that the teeth marks would show, or would leave what we call a 'hickey.' But I never thought about being cut or burned or whipped with anything.
"We started off the party with some drinks. I was sort of relieved to see that most of them were lots older than Tom, and a hell of a lot older than me. The only one that was under 35 besides Tom and me, was his girlfriend, Erica. I didn't like her much. Maybe I was jealous, but she seemed sort of cold and hard. There were way more men there than women, and they were older and seemed to have plenty of money, judging from the cars that were parked around the place and the clothes they wore.
"The beach house was really laid out. There was a big room with a kitchen running off one end, and four bedrooms. In the main room, there were a lot of couches and chaise-lounges, as well as plenty of lounge chairs. The weather was nice, but it was easy to see that no one intended to go swimming. There was a nice stretch of private beach, closed off with high wire fencing at both ends, with nice white sand.
"We sat around talking and drinking until everyone arrived. I took it easy on the booze, because I wanted to be in shape to know what was going on.
"I had shown Tom the pictures and he asked if he could show them around. I didn't mind. I'd even included a few that the Masons had given me, and he thought they were terrific, so he passed them all around. I got a lot of compliments on my shape and one old guy about 50 or so, gave me his business card and asked me to call him about doing some posing for a photographer friend of his. I didn't think anything of it at the time, and just shoved it in my purse.
"Erica started the ball rolling when she stepped out into the middle of the room and beat on her glass with a spoon, to get the attention of everyone. She seemed to know most everyone in the room and to be the sparkplug of the affair. She was tall, almost six feet, and she had enormous breasts and a pretty big ass, but on her frame, they looked pretty sexy. She said that they had a newcomer - meaning me - and that somebody ought to 'start Savvy off easy.' I was a little nervous, but Tom told me that I'd get my kicks and not to be scared, so I just stood up and took a bow when she mentioned my name.
"The old guy who had given me the card stepped forward and asked if he could have me 'brush him.' They all seemed to think that it was a good idea, so Tom pushed me into the center of the room and the old guy - his name was Jerome - began to take his clothes off. Erica told me to strip, and while I did, I was happy to hear the buzz from the others, when I took off my bra and panties and stood there naked. It was clear that they liked my body, and they also liked the way I didn't pretend to be shy. I was surprised at the nice body the old guy had. Jerome must have spent a lot of time in the sun and maybe in a gym, because he had hard muscles in his chest and stomach, and his donger was real good size, even though it wasn't anywhere near hard, yet.
"I liked the way he was looking at me and I thought that it would be a good challenge for me to be able to bring the old guy to a nice hard-on and see if I could keep it that way for maybe two or three comes.
"He motioned me over to the big couch in the middle of the room, while the others settled down with their drinks to watch. I laid down on the couch, waiting for him to take the lead in what I was supposed to do. He got on his knees beside me and began to nibble at my nipples. He wasn't gentle, either. He was really using his teeth. He would clamp down on my breast, taking a lot of it in his mouth and sucking it, then he would bring his mouth off while he clamped his teeth down, and when he reached my nipple, and it was almost coming out of his mouth, he would give an extra sharp nip. Meantime, he was digging his fingers into my cunt. He found my knob and began to use his fingernails on it, pinching it and drawing it out.
"He moved up on the couch and spread my legs, and I could see everyone watching us. I could also see that his prick wasn't a bit stiffer than it was before, and I wondered a little if he wasn't able to get a hard-on. I knew that a lot of older guys couldn't. I reached down and felt it before he crawled down between my legs, and I dug my nails into his balls - hard. Then I let my nails rake along the flab of it as I let go. It made him quiver a little, but he just went down on me. He pushed my legs up and spread my twat as wide as he could with his fingers, and then he went in after my knob with his teeth! He really knew how to go just to the limit, and to stop when it really would make you bleed, and he ate at it for a couple of minutes.
"He climbed up off me and took my hand and pulled me to my feet. 'My turn, now, Savvy,' he said, lying down on the couch with his legs spread wide. His prick was still soft, and I wondered if my sucking it or biting at it would ever bring it to a good hard-on. But, before I could go down on it, Erica came over and handed me a hairbrush! She was smiling, but it was a cold smile. She told me: 'Jerome likes the brush, Savvy. You take it, and use it one him. Start with his legs, then his stomach, and finally, beat him on the cock and balls with it!' "I took it, but I didn't know if I could use it. I just stood there, knowing that everyone in the room was watching, and I took a weak little tap at his legs, which he'd spread wide. I really only let the bristly side of the brush fall on his leg, and he surprised the hell out of me by reaching out and grabbing my cunt and digging his fingernails into me. He really hurt me, and surprised me, and almost automatically, I let go with the brush! I beat the hell out of his legs - up high, near where his flabby cock was lying nestled between his thighs. I could see it begin to rise up and swell, right from the first stroke, and when I moved up and began to hit his flat, muscular stomach, it really began to grow.
"He was still grinding his fingernails into the * softness of my snatch, but it didn't seem to hurt as much. I began to take swings at his cock, and hit him harder and faster, and with every stroke, his prick got bigger and bigger.
"He finally had a real good hard-on, and it was a dandy! Then he grabbed me and flung me down on the couch and rolled me onto my back. I knew I was ready, and he just took the brush and handed it to Erica, who was standing fairly close to us, and then he began to fuck the living hell out of me. He just plunged that big cock into me as far as he could go, while his nails dug deep into the flesh of my ass cheeks. He hollered, 'Now!' and Erica stepped over and really began to beat his ass and legs and back with that brush, and man, did he ever come alive. I don't think anyone had ever rammed me as hard and deep as Jerome did.
"I tried to make my orgasm meet his, but I was a little late. He shot a pint of hot, sticky jism into me, it seemed, but he tapered off real good, keeping up the pressure on my knob, so I managed to come a few seconds after he did.
"He was like an old-fashioned knight when it was over. He pulled it out, stood up and bent over and kissed each one of my nipples. Then he buried his lips inside the lips of my pussy, and each time he said, 'Wonderful! Thank you, my dear.' The others even clapped a little and laughed when he did this, and from there, they all scattered around to different couches and bedrooms, picking their partners, or in some cases, three or four to a group.
"Jerome asked me if there was any special way I liked it, and said he'd be glad to do anything. Tom and Erica were talking, and they came over and said they would like me to go to 'the special room' with them, and Jerome asked if he could come along. I had lost my fears by now, but I asked them if I could have a double scotch and soda, and Jerome fixed a drink for all of us. We went to one of the bedrooms at the far end of the house, with a big picture window overlooking the beach, and I saw why it was called the 'special room.' "There was a big frame bed in the room, and it was rigged with handcuffs and leg shackles at all four comers. There were adjustable gadgets on the cables, to fit any length arms and legs, and I began to get a little scared. I had liked Jerome digging his fingernails into my cunt and his teeth into my nipples, but I didn't know if I was ready for any hairbrush - and especially for one of the several whips that were in a row on a table near the bed.
"I was catching on fast, and I wasn't sure that I wasn't in over my head with this bunch of pain specialists. I didn't mind beating the hell out of somebody else, but I didn't need any punishment to turn me on, and actually, it didn't do too much to pep up my sex feelings. I thought that I would enjoy Jerome, the way he'd been, without any pinching or biting or whipping, because he had a good cock once it was up and able, so I wasn't too eager to let myself be tied down and fucked around with.
"But Tom volunteered for the first session, and it was a relief to me. Erica fastened him in after he had stripped, and she had taken off her clothes. I was amazed at what a sexy body she had: big tits, a nice, tight-looking pussy, and that wide ass and broad hips. I wondered about the scars on her ass and legs, but I figured that she liked her whippings harder than most of them. I guess I counted on Tom and even Jerome, to see that I didn't have to have it too rough, my first time. But I was interested in what they would do to Tom. I learned a lot about the sadists from that session, and also about the ones who can enjoy sex better when they feel they are being forced or punished.
"Tom was one of those. That's why he hadn't been able to really get with it the other night at my house, I guess. He had some wild tastes in sex, but he had to be able to tell himself that he was 'forced into it,' or else he had to feel lowdown, so he could look at the whips and the pricks in his mouth as punishment.
"Oh, yes, he was a cocksucker - or at least he was if he was 'forced to,' and couldn't do anything about it. He also liked to be bit on his cock - and I mean bitten until the blood ran. I didn't know what my part was to be, but Erica made it pretty clear when she handed me a short riding whip and told me that, when they got going good, I should beat her across the but with it - and to really lay it on!
"Tom lay on his back. He had a wild, excited look in his eyes, and Erica took a hairbrush that had metal bristles and began to scrape it up and down along Jerome's prick. Every once in a while, she would beat him on the thighs with it, and in a couple of minutes his cock got hard and stiff and she stopped.
"Before he could lose his hard, he straddled Tom's face, propping himself up with his hands on top of the bed frame. He used one hand to guide his cock into Tom's open mouth, and I swear, he began to jam it into Tom's mouth as hard and deep as he had shoved it into my cunt. But I could tell that Tom liked it, because I watched closely and saw that, at the end of the 'in' stroke, Tom would clamp his teeth down on Jerome's prick and really bite, letting it nip the head of Jerome's prick each time it came out from between his lips.
"Meanwhile, Erica had laid down with her head in position to gobble Tom's prick. She was on her stomach and she had one hand underneath her, so she could reach up inside herself and play with her own knob while she sucked Tom's cock. But she was doing more than suck it: she was doing the same kind of biting that Tom was doing to Jerome!
"When she got going she mumbled to me, while her mouth was filled with Tom's prick, to whip her. I was so damned mixed up - half scared - half hotter than I'd ever been, that I must have gotten carried away. The first crack I hit Erica was a good belt across her fat ass, and it brought a flick of blood! She moaned and bit Tom's cock harder, and I guess the sight of it really turned me on, because I began to really lay that whip across her body. I began to get scared, and I eased off, but she didn't even seem to notice. When I got going with the whip on her, all three of them seemed to get whipped into a lather, and the action was something!
"I don't know if they all came together, but they were awfully close, and within a few seconds of each other, they began to relax. You know something? I hadn't even realized it, but towards the last, I'd been shoving my fingers up inside my cunt and really digging away at my knob. I was hot and I needed a come!
"Erica rolled over and looked at me, and she pulled me over to the bed and went down on my cunt, using her teeth and her fingers while Tom and Jerome watched, and inside a minute, I came like a thunderstorm.
"But that was only the beginning of the ways that you could turn on with this setup. Erica wanted the next turn in the handcuffs and shackles, and Tom fastened her in good. He asked me if I thought I could try the whip, and I was half-loaded from the booze and three-quarters drunk with sex, so I said I would try. The way it worked, I straddled Erica so she could work on my cunt with her mouth, while Tom was down on Erica's pussy, shoving his cock in while he held her ass up with his hands.
"Jerome was the oddball in this setup, so he got to use the whip. He handled that whip so that he got me and Tom's back on alternate strokes, and a few times he cut it close and laid it onto my ass.
"It was something else, I'll tell you! With Erica nibbling hard at my box, letting her teeth close around my knob, then taking the loose folds of flesh in her teeth and pulling them so far out while she bit, I could look down and see them, see flecks of blood on her lips and on the skin of my cunt. It drove me wild. Jerome could see that I was getting with it more, and he began to use that whip harder. I could feel Tom at one point lean forward and sink his teeth into the flesh of my shoulder while he was slamming his prick up into Erica's cunt as far and as hard as he could. And Jerome kept slashing away with the whip.
"I didn't notice until the end that Jerome had a big hard-on and he was whipping away at his own cock with one hand, masturbating like crazy. Just as I came, he shot a load into his hand and he licked it all off with his tongue!
"I was getting sore - not just my back and ass - but my cunt, but I wondered how it would be to be chained up like that, so I volunteered to take a turn. I knew that, in that position, I wouldn't have to take any more of the whip, so I let Erica fasten me in, not knowing what they wanted to try out, or what position they would take. And this was entirely different!
"Jerome got down below, holding the cheeks of my ass up high, and he shoved his prick deep into my asshole! Erica had the whip again while Tom positioned himself over my face with his prick in my mouth, upside down, while he used his tongue, fingers and teeth on my box. It must have been tight down there, with Jerome's cock in my asshole, and Tom digging into Jerome's belly to try to get his tongue into my snatch, but it worked all right for me.
"I sucked and bit Tom's cock, and he shot a load into my mouth long before I could come, so I swallowed it and kept on. Meantime, Erica was having a ball with the whip; first belting Tom's back and ass, and then switching to Jerome's back. She even flicked me a couple of times on the legs, where Jerome's body didn't cover me, and it gave me a quick thrill every time she hit me. She was clever with the whip, just flicking me with the tip of it so that it stung good, but didn't bring blood.
"That was it for that session. On the way home that night, I wasn't sure that it was really my dish, although I did have some pretty good memories of it. And, before I left, Jerome cornered me and said he wasn't kidding about the photographer, and that if I was interested, he was sure I could pick up quite a nice fee for posing naked.
"He asked if he could show his friend the pictures I'd brought, so I let him take them. There were some good shots in the bunch that showed my boobies real good, and a couple with my snatch wide open, plus a few good pictures of me with my ass to the camera. I think I have a nice ass, and a couple of men have even told me that I have a nice, attractive, and sexy asshole!
"I made a vague date with Tom for the next weekend, but I was interested in the offer of the meeting with the photographer, and Jerome had given me his card and asked me to call him next day - Monday.
"When I got home that night, I began to think about all that had happened, and I wondered if my mother and father, or the Masons, had ever tried sex kicks that way. It was strange, because while I was taking a shower, my father came into the bathroom. My mother had already gone to bed, and he spotted the marks on me right away. He asked me if somebody had beaten me, or if I was hurt. I told him the truth - that I'd been to a sex party where they went in for brushes and whips and chains, but that I hadn't really taken part in the violent parts of it.
"He began to get a hard-on while he looked at and felt the marks on my ass and legs, and I suddenly wanted him to fuck and suck me, without all the whippings and beating. I wanted a man inside me, and to feel lips on my breasts and cunt that were soft and gentle, and I told him that I wanted him to just have me and kiss me and baby me.
"He went to his room and stripped, mostly to check to be sure that my mother was asleep. He told me that she had taken on quite a load of booze and would probably sleep until noon the next day, and when he came to my room, he locked the door.
"He acted different, somehow. He didn't treat me like a little girl, but he was tender and gentle and loving, and after he made me come by sucking my cunt and massaging my sore nipples, I tried to give him the best fuck I could, and he said it was the best he had ever had, bar none.
"He told me that I was fooling with dangerous stuff, with the weirdoes and the whippings, and he didn't demand that I stop, but he practically begged me not to go back for any more of that kind of stuff.
"I'll never forget him laying there, his hand on my pussy, gently playing with my box, while he kissed the nipples of my breast, then my mouth, so gently. He said, 'What's going to become of my baby?' I remember how long I lay awake that night, thinking about him, and wondering if it was really as wrong as everybody said, to love your father that way, and to let him fuck you and suck your pussy. After all, it made both of us so happy, and it didn't really hurt anyone. I was on the pill. My mother was asleep and didn't know. Besides, she was out fucking around with a lot of other guys - women, too - as far as I knew, so why should we think of her?
"I called Jerome the next day, from school, and he said he had arranged an appointment with the photographer on Tuesday night. He said he would be there, to see that everything went right, and I agreed to meet him and let him take me there.
"I thought we would go to a studio, but it was a swanky private home in Beverly Hills, and I wasn't the only girl there. It was the first time in my life that a man seemed to look at my naked body without getting a hard-on. Burke - that was all I ever knew him by - was all business. He told me to strip, and the two other girls did, also. They were a lot older than me, and they were pretty calm about the whole thing. One of them looked 40, and she told me that she was a professional stripper. The other one was married and had three kids and no husband, and both of them were curious as hell as to why a pretty young girl like me with a body like I had would want to be photographed nude.
"I didn't really have an answer, so I told them that I was alone in town and needed the money. I guess they believed me, and we had a three-hour session, posing in all kinds of positions.
"I thought that, when we were finished, Burke and Jerome would want some action, but they didn't. They both seemed to be only interested in getting good pictures, showing a lot of cunt and tits, and believe me, they did. They posed us alone, in pairs, and as a trio, and my eyes were burning from the flashbulbs when Burke decided he had enough. I was ready to fall over when he handed me four one-hundred-dollar bills! But Jerome told me that was standard pay. The trouble was, I didn't know what to do with them. I thought that the best thing would be to tell my father about it, and let him keep the money for me.
"Jerome asked me if I wanted to go to his house for a little drink and maybe a little sex, but I was tired and I didn't want to go through any of the sadism and masochism bit, so he satisfied himself by getting down between my legs in the back seat of his car, outside Burke's place, and sucking my cunt until I came.
"I didn't tell my father about the money that night. I thought I would wait until we had fucked and sucked again, like we had the night before, and we were real close to each other, I didn't know then, but Jerome had said he was my step-father, and had signed a release form that allowed the pictures Burke had taken to be used in one of the big men's magazines.
"From then on, I seemed to be the most popular girl in the state. The Masons called. Tom wanted me to go to more parties - even Erica called me twice and wanted me to go with her to some sex orgies. Moira and her bunch of kids - and that is what they seemed like to me, now -kept pestering me at school. I began to take days off from school, but not for any of those creeps. I began to skip school to spend some time with a guy that I met quite by accident.
"Steve was a hippie, but he was different. He wasn't on dope or pot, and he talked a lot about things like 'Identity with God,' and 'finding one's place in the universe.' He was sexy, all right, and we fucked up a storm, right from the first time I wait out with him. But there was a lot more to him than just his cock. I think that, for the first time, I was falling in love."
CHAPTER SIX - "Sex With The Devil Cult"
"Steve was a funny guy. He had started out wanting to go into the clergy Can you imagine that? When he got off that kick, he went pretty wild. He tried pot, booze, and finally LSD, and he was still taking a few 'trips' with LSD, but he had learned enough about it so that he wouldn't 'freak out' by himself. He always had some friends there, to see that he didn't hurt himself.
"But he had found something new. I had never been down to Sunset Strip, in Hollywood, although a few of the kids at school had raved about what a 'gas' it was. I just never had to get away from my own neighborhood to have a ball or to get sex or any kicks that I had wanted. I guess that was why Steve kept telling me that I was 'fresh' and 'ripe' for the new thing that he had discovered.
"He was strange because he wasn't well-educated, yet he really had a good mind. He had read so many books -not the ones they make you read in school, or the ones they call the classics, but books on things that he wanted the answers to. I guess at first he made me feel dumb - I mean real dumb, because I couldn't talk about any of the things that he wanted to. I got thinking one night: the only thing I really knew much about was sex, and how to turn on.
"I still hadn't found the guts to give my father the money, so I had it hidden in my room. I played around with the idea of going back and making another fistful of dollars, but I hadn't really liked Burke, and I didn't like either of the other dames I'd had to work with. One, I was sure, was a real, roughneck Lesbian and I'd had my fill of that.
"I was really at a standstill. I didn't know what I wanted to do. I felt as if I were half-toasted bread - and I didn't know whether to try to get back to being pure white, or to go ahead and do the job up right. Jerome had offered - or I should say hinted - that I could make a damned good living by going to his kind of parties - the violence orgies, but that was out. Dale Mason had once told me that if I ever decided to do it for money, to let him know, and he could send me some out-of-town guys that would pay up to a hundred bucks for a good fuck and suck job. But I didn't want any of that. I didn't know that it was love and attention I wanted, until Steve happened to me.
"Steve had two hang-ups: speed and oil painting. He had fooled around with water colors, doing a lot of psychedelic posters and drawings, but he was really interested in some serious art. He made his living working in a darkroom for a photographer. In fact, that's how I met him, through the photographer, Burke.
"I had left my phone number with Burke, and he kept bugging me to do some pictures for him, but I really didn't want to. I was doing real bad in school and I thought I had better cool it on the outside and concentrate on school. And, I think I was getting a little bored with too much sex all in big lumps. Any time I wanted any, I knew that I could get plenty from my father, the Masons, or Moira and the gang.
"I guess that maybe I was tired of just being a sex toy, with nobody really caring about me as a person. In all my life, I don't remember anyone really taking any time to talk to me, not even my mother and father. Oh, they asked me about my school, or if I needed or wanted anything, but there was never any real closeness. It was always the same - people seemed interested only in what I could give them, and it was always a feel, or a kiss or a fuck or a suck. I don't remember any of the men ever telling me I was pretty, or sweet, or nice. Oh, they told me what a sexy, beautiful body I had, but hell, I imagine a guy tells that to a bar tramp if he's trying to get her in bed, or trying to get her to go on for more fucking.
"Anyhow, Steve got the number out of Burke's files, after he had developed the pictures I'd posed for and he called me and explained who he was. I thought it was just a guy who was setting me up to screw him. Why not? He'd seen my wide-open pussy and my titties, and he could have been just turned on when he saw how young I looked.
"But he told me that he was an artist, and really wanted to paint me in the nude. He said I had too beautiful a body and face to waste on men's magazine pictures. He also told me that he couldn't pay me, but that he'd give anything in the world for the chance.
"I liked his voice and the way he used words. He wasn't smart-alecky or too 'hip,' and he sounded like he might be nice to know, even if it was just for a change from all the sex sots that I'd been going around with, so I told him I'd at least go on a date with him and we'd see what happened. Know where our first date was? The art gallery, so help me!
"Steve rode a motorcycle; a big, powerful one, loaded with chrome. It was my first time on one, and it was a real kick. I had always liked speed, but riding with the wind whipping your face, and feeling as if you were in real danger did something else for me. Lots of people won't believe it, but I've talked to other kids about it, and it's true that sometimes you can get a real sexy feeling from speed. It's almost like having somebody feel you up or kiss your nipples or stomach. Not a real 'come' thrill, but a sort of 'warm-up' kind of feeling.
"Steve wore a moustache and beard and had long hair, and he wore tinted driving glasses half the time, but he was a clean guy. He kept his clothes clean and neat - even the leather jacket and dungarees he wore most of the time. He told me that he had once belonged to a motorcycle gang, but that he couldn't waste his time on the things they did, so he just quit. He liked to enter races and hill-climbs, but he often had to skip them because he sometimes had to work Saturdays and Sundays, when the events were always held.
"Lately, he had been hanging out at a Sunset Strip club where a lot of hippies met - the more serious ones, not the ones that just went down there to give the cops a bad time or to show off. There's a difference, you know. A lot of the kids head for The Strip just to be able to get away from strict parents, so they can be free - be with their own kind for a few hours - wear their kind of clothes and do their own thing.
"The ones who hung out where Steve did were mostly serious ones, and they were older. They were honestly trying to find something to believe in. They didn't hate the older people, or 'the establishment,' but they just didn't want to get caught in the same old trap.
"Steve also had his own apartment. It wasn't much of a place, just one big room with a bed and a stove and refrigerator, but all one wall was glass, so he could use it as a studio. On our first date, he took me up there after we came from the art gallery, and I really dug the place. He showed me a lot of his paintings, and I thought he did have a real good knack with figures and faces. He had a whole bookcase full of books on religion - all the different religions of the world, and he told me about wanting to be in the clergy, and how he had studied the Bible, then began to read about other religions and had changed his mind.
"He mentioned that he had been digging into something new, and said that maybe he would take me to one of the meetings, if I wanted to go. I didn't think much about it then, because I never had really dug anything religious. I think I had been to Sunday School a few times when I was little, but that was with my grandmother. My parents never did go to church. They were married by a Justice of the Peace, I think, instead of by a minister.
"Anyhow, Steve got so interested in showing me his paintings and talking about this new religion he was digging into, that I began to wonder if he was ever going to ask me to take my clothes off, or make any kind of a pass at me. He had some sketches of a nude woman, but she had big breasts and a fat ass, so I asked Steve if that was the way she really looked, or if that was just the way he had drawn her.
"He told me that it was some pig that he had picked up, and she had been drunk. She wanted a piece of ass, and didn't want to pose for him. He said that he had kicked her out, but that he had sketched her from memory, while she had laid there, trying to get him to screw her or eat her pussy. It was funny, but when Steve used the words, they didn't sound sexy or dirty. I suppose that was because he was so disgusted. He was so wrapped up in what he was talking about that he didn't even see that I was leading up to some sex with him. Finally, I said: 'Well, I'm here, and you did ask me to pose -' "He acted as if I had just reminded him, but he said that he wanted to really do it right, and he wanted me to pose in the daylight so he could catch all the beautiful little curves and shadows of my body, so we set it up for the next day, early. The more stand-offish he was, the hotter I got for him, and for the first time, I came right out and asked a guy for it. I asked him what he had seen in the photos that had made him pick me, and he said, 'The curve of your breasts - the way they tilt up, saucy and proud... the way your fanny curves in... the shape of your mouth and lips... a hundred things... "He still didn't get it, so I began to take off my sweater - I didn't have any bra on. When I stripped it off and he stood there looking at my breasts, he finally warmed up. He came over and caressed my breasts, running his fingers over the taut nipple, and saying how beautiful they were. He was like an artist, though, not a hot-pants lover, until he finally saw that I was taking off my skirt. When I dropped it and he saw that I had no panties on, he grabbed me and began to kiss my neck and ears. I'd never been kissed by a man with a beard and moustache before, and I wondered how it would be if he went down on me.
"I didn't have to wait long. He pulled me to the bed and I laid down and spread my legs. He began to kiss my stomach, sticking his tongue into my bellybutton and into the creases where my legs met my body, near the hair. His beard tickled and turned me on pretty good, and when he spread my legs and opened my pussy with his fingers and began to lick my knob, it was really something else.
"With each upward stroke, he would end up by rubbing his beard inside me and it covered a lot of the inside of my pussy. I was ready to come and I reached down and grabbed his long hair and pulled his head in closer, while I wound my legs around his neck. He stepped up the tempo and I came in another few seconds, and by then, I wanted him inside me - all he could give me of his prick.
"He had already started to take his pants off before he thought to ask me if I could 'take care of myself.' I giggled and told him I'd been on the BC pill for a long time, so he took his pants off. He was already hard, but not real big and stiff, so I just tolled him back on his back and went down on him. I held his balls in my hand and licked his shaft from one end to the other, nipping the head of it a little, and he began to squirm around and shove it deeper into my mouth. When he was good and ready, I climbed up on top of him and inserted his cock into my pussy, then I rolled over and pulled him on top of me and let him go to work.
"He was like my father - tender, gentle, as if he was grateful - or as if he cared about me as a person, and after all the wild fucking I'd been having, he was extra good. We came together, and I asked him if he wanted me to suck him until he was ready again. Instead of answering, he positioned himself so he could do a sixty-nine, and doing it this way, he could really spread my cunt and get a lot more of his mouth inside, and that meant more of his moustache and his beard. He took long strokes with his tongue that covered my asshole, too, and I came real quick. He was only a few seconds behind me, and afterwards, he turned around and pulled me close and kissed my mouth and eyes, and told me that he was in love with me.
"That was the first time - or at least, it was the first time that I believed anybody - except my father. It was a new, warm feeling for me, and it made me feel like I was a real woman. Then Steve really knocked me off my feet: he asked me to marry him!
"I was so surprised that I blurted out that I was only 15, but he said that in the religion he had decided on, age didn't enter into it. It was the souls of the people involved that determined who should belong to each other, he said. I told him I'd have to think about it, and besides, I didn't see any point in marrying now. We could just have sex any time we wanted it, or live together.
"He said that it mattered in his religious beliefs, because only couples of the same beliefs could have intercourse. He told me that he had been wrong to even do it to me, but that he would find a way to atone, after he had talked it over with the High Priest.
"All I knew was that he was different from anyone I'd ever been with, and that as much as I knew how to, I loved him. "I called my parents and told them I was staying with a friend and I stayed all night with Steve. He didn't have any booze, but I gave him some money and he went and got me some scotch and soda, and some beer for himself. He said that was all he ever drank.
"We drank while he talked about all the things he liked: his 'wheels,' his painting, his parents and how they wanted him to go ahead and be a minister, all sorts of things. I began to get pretty loaded, and I had left my clothes off, hoping to turn him on again. He had been so good before - so different. I could see that he was getting a hard-on, and I spread my legs wide so he could see how wet and ready I was. He took off his pants again and climbed on top of me, kissing my mouth and my neck and breasts, turning me on even more with his beard brushing against my skin and my nipples.
"Just when he put the tip of his cock in between the lips of my cunt, the door opened, without any knock or warning, and this tall, skinny kid stood there just inside the door. Steve was mad, but he kept his cool and just told the guy: 'Well, Pete, for God's sake, shut the door.' The guy shut it, and Steve got up, trying to shield me from the guy's bug-eyed stare. You'd think that he'd never seen a girl's cunt before, or a pair of tits.
"Steve put his pants on and tossed me my clothes, and I went around a little bend in the room and slipped them on. I could hear plainly what they were talking about. Steve was saying that Pete should knock or make some noise, before he walked in like that. Pete had a whining voice and he grumbled that he had never had to knock before, and what was so special about me. Steve told him right out that he was in love with me, and that maybe we would get married.
"Pete wanted to know if Steve 'had the stuff for tomorrow's meeting,' and Steve said he did. He gave Pete a little package of something and told him to get the hell out and give us a break. When Pete had gone, I asked Steve if that was LSD, and he said it was, and that a lot of people that met with them took it. I asked him if I would like it, and he said that maybe I would, but he didn't want me to try any yet.
"We fooled around for an hour or so, and I was belting the booze pretty good, so Steve said we should have a quickie and then get to bed because he wanted to be up early and begin some sketches while the light was good, then take me to the meeting in the afternoon.
"I don't know if it was the booze, or the different kind of feeling that Steve had given me, but I never slept better in my life, with his arms around me and his prick pressed in between my legs, and his beard brushing against my cheeks.
"In the morning, we had cornflakes, then he had me pose sitting on a chair and then laying down on the bed, and he did some rough sketches of me. I thought he caught the shape of my face and my body real good, but he said that it was only the rough beginnings, and wait until I saw the finished paintings.
"We didn't have any sex, and I guessed it was because of what he'd told me about 'two souls and the same beliefs,' and he wanted to talk to the 'High Priest,' and all. I was happy, so I didn't bug him or try to turn him on. It was just good, being there with him, having all his attention, and not having him just interested in fucking me. And he really raved about my body and face being so beautiful.
"A little after 12, we got dressed and went out to the beach on his motorcycle. We had a good ride. He took some winding backroads through some wooded canyons, and I got that sexy kick again when he took some of the turns and I thought we were going to spill. He was like a wild, young colt that I'd seen on a ranch once. I just hugged him tight all the way, glad that I had somebody to hang on to, at last.
"We ended up at a place right on the beach, but it wasn't anything like the place that Tom had taken me to. It was really a fishing shack. It was long and low, and there were some other motorcycles and some souped-up hotrods parked in the sandy drive leading out to it.
"When we walked inside, I thought I was going blind. All I could see was a big, flickering light that changed color every few seconds, making things in the room seem to jump around and distort themselves. It was one of those psychedelic things, and some of the things in the room had been painted in certain colors that caught certain other colors and gave weird effects.
"It took me a couple of minutes before I could see clear enough to get any idea of what was going on. There were several persons there, but they were in the shadows, and I couldn't see their faces. Steve led me to a couch and we sat down next to another couple, but I couldn't tell if it was two boys or a girl and a boy, only that they both had long hair, like Steve's.
"I figured I was at an LSD party, but it turned out to be a lot more than that, although Steve told me that most of the people in the room were already 'on a trip.' He told me not to be scared, that he was going to take care of me, and he told me that he was going to shoot some LSD into my arm, because he could control the dose better that way, and he wanted me to take a 'short hop,' the first time. I'd always thought that people took LSD on a sugar cube or something like that, but I trusted him, and I wanted to please him.
"He went to a cabinet in the back and came back with a hypodermic needle and some cotton that he'd dipped in alcohol, 'so I wouldn't get infection,' he told me.
"When he shoved that needle in the big vein in my wrist, it stung like hell for a minute, but then I began to relax and I felt as if I was floating. My mouth began to taste funny and I couldn't identify the taste, but it wasn't pleasant. But then I began to feel light as a feather, almost as if I were stepping outside my own body and standing there, watching a hollow Savvy beginning to laugh, for no reason at all. I began to watch the lights and the things they were doing to objects in the room, and suddenly, I realized that Steve wasn't beside me. But it didn't really matter. I could take care of myself, anywhere, anytime - and especially now. I felt as if I wanted to say, 'To hell with Steve. To hell with the whole goddamned world. I'm okay. I don't need anybody - ever!' "Then I saw Steve - or at least, it looked like him. He was standing at one end of the room, beside a table. On the table was a vase with black roses in it. I remember thinking how funny that was: black roses! But right away, it seemed all right. There was a crucifix hung on the wall behind the table, and it was upside down. And standing beside the table was Steve, only he was all red, and his eyebrows were slanted upward, like pictures of the Devil that I'd seen, and he had some horns on his head like the Devil's!
"He was stark naked, and he was holding his cock in one hand, jerking it a little to make it harder than it was. I could hear his voice, but it sounded as if it were coming from a long way off, and it had an echo to it. He was saying, 'It is only the flesh. Only the body that lives. There is no soul. Only the present pleasures of the flesh matter. There is no tomorrow. There is no heaven, nor a hell, except those we enter here on this earth. The flesh passeth, and we pass with it, so live, live, live - for the flesh alone!' "He pointed to where I was sitting, wondering if I was having a nightmare, and said, 'Satana has chosen a new bride. She is ready to be tested. If her flesh is acceptable, then she will become the bride of Satana this day!' He walked to me and took my hand and led me to a long, bare table. He told me to strip, and I felt as if I couldn't do anything else. I was helpless, yet I felt as powerful as an elephant. I didn't feel sexy or hot, even looking at Steve's hard-on. I just took off my sweater and skirt, and laid down on the table. I did notice that when I laid down, I was red, like Steve, but I couldn't think clearly enough then to realize that I was under the glare of a red light that was being directed down on the table from somewhere above.
"Steve waved toward my body with his hand and spoke to the others in the shadows. 'Judge this body - this flesh, male and female alike!' "I saw them begin to come out of the shadows. They formed a rough line and passed by the table where I was lying, and they all did the same thing: they bent and kissed each of my nipples, then spread my legs and licked and sucked my cunt! Most of them had long hair, but I thought that some of them were girls.
"When they had all kissed my breasts and cunt, Steve pointed to a doorway, and I looked. In the weird, flashing whirling lights, stood something out of a horror movie. He was painted black, with the outlines of the skeleton bones painted in white all over his body. He had a black hood over his head, and in his hand he had a big, metallic-looking prick, that was painted gold. It must have been over a foot long, and as big around as a baseball bat and it had two golden balls at the base of it.
"Steve said, in that echoing voice, 'Since none has found this flesh unworthy, Satana, the final test is to be yours!' I watched the monster walk over to me, holding that ugly, phony prick out with both hands, like he was carrying a flag, and I screamed. I was already getting cold. I know I had been shivering for ten minutes, but now I was shivering in terror! When I screamed, two shadows came toward me and one held my arms and the other my legs, and Steve disappeared for a moment and came back with a needle full of the junk he'd shot into my wrist before.
"I stopped screaming because I was actually choking in fright, and he inserted the needle in my other wrist and gave me another blast. Somehow, in my mind's deepest spot, I knew that what he'd given me wasn't LSD. It was morphine! I knew for sure, when I began to feel at ease again. I began to float, and I wondered if I were conscious or unconscious. I couldn't feel a thing. I couldn't even feel fear anymore.
"The black monster stepped over, and I knew that the men had let me go, but I couldn't move. Then they spread my legs wide - one from each side - and the black thing was standing at the end of the table, looking at my wide-open cunt. He was poising that big, ugly metal prick at the lips of my cunt, edging it inside the lips, then he plunged it in, with all his weight behind it! The last thing I remember was trying to scream, then it all went black.
"I must have been out for two hours, and when I finally roused up, I thought I was in hell. I knew I was bleeding, and my whole body felt as if it were on fire, starting with my cunt and going all the way to my temples. I was cold, yet I was on fire. I tried to sit up, but I couldn't. Then I felt something down by my cunt, and a voice said, 'Better put another icepack on it.' I felt the hot mass leave my cunt and. in a minute, a new hot flash hit me. It numbed me for a minute, then it began to hurt again.
"I was in such pain that I wished that someone would give me some more of the stuff in the needle, to make the hurt go away. I didn't know where I was, but I knew I wasn't on the table where I'd passed out from the pain.
"I kept seeing the sketches of me that Steve had made, and something kept hammering at my brain, over and over. Something had been missing. I was too tired to think any more, but I was scared and hurting. I wondered if I were really alive, but I know that dead people couldn't feel pain like I was feeling it. I tried to focus my eyes, but I couldn't. All I could do was concentrate on the goddamn pain that was coming from between my legs. And then it hit me - what was missing in those sketches! My cunt! Steve had not drawn anything there! At the time, I guessed that he would fill that in later, but now I knew that for some reason, he'd done it deliberately.
"Somebody gave me a pill and some water, and in a few minutes, a needle was put into my arm again, and then I just drifted off. I was on a sea of titties and pricks, and all the pricks were hard and they were all trying to shove themselves into my aching cunt. No bodies or feces - just big, hard, hurting cocks!
"The next hours were bad. I regained consciousness a few times and remember hearing voices. They sounded worried, but angry. When I finally opened my eyes and was able to focus them, I saw that I was in a sleazy bedroom. My eyes burned and my head felt like it was going to blow off. And standing at the foot of the bed, glaring down at me, was a fat, ugly woman with scraggly hair and big, ugly-looking breasts.
"'Well, our sleeping beauty is back with us,' she said in a sarcastic tone. 'Ain't that nice?' "I felt dead between my legs and all over my stomach. I was aware of a pain, but I just couldn't locate it. All I could manage to say was: 'Where am I?' "She sneered down at me and answered, 'You're goddamned lucky you ain't in the morgue, kid, fucking around with those goddamned hopheads and queers!' I tried to adjust my mind to what she was saying. One part of it made some sense: hopheads. I was sure they had dosed me up with drugs, from the way I had kept drifting out of the scene. But the part about 'queers' was a little fuzzy. How could Steve be a queer?
"She brought me some soup - chicken broth, I guess - and she said her name was Anna, and that one of the guys had brought me to her to take care of. I was too sore and tired then to wonder why, but I found out later that she was an abortionist, and that she had performed abortions on several girls, so someone had thought that she'd know how to take care of me. I panicked when I remembered that ugly thing shoving that big, metal cock into me. I knew I must be all torn up inside, and I wondered why anyone would do a thing like that.
"I went back to sleep for a long time, and when I woke up, and felt my head clear a little, Anna told me I'd been there two days, and that she was getting worried.
"She asked me if any of those 'queers' knew my name or where I lived, and I told her that only Steve did. I wondered if he would have had the decency to call my folks, or if it was even him that had brought me here. I asked Anna what she had meant by 'goddamned queers and hopheads,' and she told me, in her own way. She started by sneering at me, and at everyone like me. 'You goddamned punk kids. You all think you're so fuckin' smart. You're going to change all the rules and run the world. But you're dumb - all of you, and you're all twisted in the head. Those fucking guys that grabbed you are homos - queer as three-dollar bills! And they're all hopheads! How the hell could even a dumb bitch like you get tangled up with them and let them do this to you? You make me want to puke!' "I tried to tell her that Steve couldn't be a queer - that he had sucked and fucked me, like any man. But even while I was telling her, I remembered what he had said - all that shit about 'checking it out with the High Priest,' and all, and I began to see that I had fallen for a gag. They were all woman haters - queers! That must have been why they shoved that goddamned phallic symbol up my cunt like that, to rip me apart because they hated women and their cunts!
"I was scared then, and I asked Anna if a person could get hooked on dope after maybe three or four injections. She said she didn't know, but that if I felt the urge for any, to fight it.
"I laid there a long time wondering what I should do. I didn't know if my parents would have the cops looking for me, or what. I also didn't know whether they would kick me out or turn me over to the juvenile fuzz, if I went home. I hit a low spot, when I realized just how few persons in this whole crummy world were close enough to help me, or cared a goddamn about whether I lived or died.
"But Anna said I couldn't stay there. She'd already been in trouble with the cops, even though they couldn't convict her. She told me to call somebody - anybody, and get my ass to hell out, as soon as I could - and the sooner the better.
"I couldn't walk. I tried, and I couldn't. It was as if I had pieces of sandpaper or a board with nails, shoved up inside me. Every move I made made me want to throw up or pass out cold. I didn't have any choice. I called my father.
"He cried on the phone, then he got mad, so I had to tell him that I was hurt. I made him promise that he'd come and get me alone, and not tell anyone the address, then or later. I told him that the woman who had cared for me had nothing to do with what had happened, and I didn't want her hurt.
"He swore and called me a lousy slut, and told me to go to hell and take care of myself or go to whoever had hurt me, but when he heard me crying, he pulled a switch. He cried, and said, 'Just wait there, baby. Just take care. Give me the address and I'll be there inside an hour. We'll work it out, baby - we'll work it out. I - I love you, Savvy - I still love you.' "Anna left me alone. She didn't want to have anyone even be able to identify her. I tried to thank her - and later on - I sent her 50 bucks, but she just kept on calling me a dumb little whore, and she left. When Daddy walked into the place, I thought he was going to cry again. It was dirty and smelly, and I couldn't get up off the dirty bed. All I could do was cry. And, do you know - I don't remember crying since I was about six, when I fell off my bike and skinned both knees?
"He had to carry me to the car, and for the first time, I had an idea where I was. We were in a dingy, beat-up joint near Venice, California. There's a big amusement park there, and a lot of hippies and weirdoes shacked up there for a while, before the people and the police ran them off.
"When my father put me in the back seat of the car, my dress came up and he could see my crotch. I guess it must have really shook him up. I was still bleeding. Anna had tried to patch me up, but all she had used was peroxide and some sort of antiseptic powder, and I was a mess. My father took one look, and told me he had to take me to a hospital. You know, at that point, he didn't know what happened and I suppose he thought I'd been gang-raped, or something like that. I tried to tell him I couldn't go to a hospital, that I was scared of the police, but he wouldn't listen.
"He took me to a hospital near our home and checked me in. He had to answer some questions, but he told them that he didn't know what had happened, nor where, so they notified the police. He had reported me missing, and he called to tell them to cancel the report, that he had found me, but the police came anyway. I wouldn't talk to them, and the doctors said I was in no condition to talk, but they placed me under some sort of a protective custody or partial arrest, or something. They ordered the hospital to notify them when I was able to talk, or before they released me.
"Before they performed surgery, I told the doctor about the drugs, and asked him to use ether or gas, and he did. They had to cut and sew me up good - over 150 stitches, they told me, and - I don't have to take any birth control pills again - ever.
"My mother came, and she was mad as hell. All she could babble about was 'How could you do this to your father and me?' She didn't give a fuck about me; just thought about herself. The goddamned fucking, lousy slut! At least, my father worried about what was going to happen to me. He talked to the cops and he told me that maybe the best thing would be for me to tell them exactly what had happened. He couldn't, because I hadn't even told him.
"Lying there in the hospital, I had time to think, and I wasn't about to fink to the fuzz. I'd find a way to get even with those rotten bastards - and especially weirdo Steve! I got out of it easy with the cops. I just told them that I didn't remember a thing - that I'd been walking down Sunset and somebody had hit me, and that from there on, I didn't remember one thing.
"I know they didn't believe me, because there wasn't a mark on my body - except for my cunt - but they couldn't do anything.
"There was a war going on at home. I felt a little guilty, because my stupidity had brought it to a head. But when I thought it over a little more, I knew goddamned well that they had brought it on themselves. My old man raved at my mother that it was all their fault - he didn't try to blame her alone. He said we were all going to move to a different town, and make a new start; that they were going to be parents, for a change, and knock off all the horseshit about sex and mate-swapping.
"I didn't find all this out until later, but he beat the shit out of her, and later, he even went over and decked Dale Mason!
"But my mother told him to go fuck himself, and she headed for the divorce courts! Imagine that! With me lying in a hospital! Ain't that really 'mother love*?
"When it came time for me to go home, my dad told me that he had moved into a small apartment, and he was fair - I'll give him that. He asked me if I wanted to go with my mother, or with him, and he gave me a third choice of going to live with my grandfather. He told me that his attorney had warned him that the courts wouldn't be very hot on the idea of a 15 year-old 'promiscuous child,' as he put it, living with her father - especially since my mother was naming a dozen dames in the divorce suit.
"But as it turned out, I didn't have to make a choice: the State made it for all of us. One night, after midnight, when I felt I could make it, I just split!
"I went home, got the money I had stashed, packed a small suitcase and some cosmetics, and cut out. I grabbed a bus for San Diego - but I knew I wouldn't stop there! I was going to a place where nobody knew me, but where I could make my own way, as long as I had something to sell. And, the last few days in the hospital, I knew I still had it, because one nurse and two interns had made passes at me! Oh, they didn't want any right then, but they wanted to have my name and address and phone number, so they could 'dig me later.' Fuck them! Fuck the world! And - fuck you too, buster!"
CHAPTER SEVEN - "Sex Below The Border"
"My mother and dad used to take me to Tijuana. They thought I was too young or too dumb to see what a wide-open shitpot that town was. If they had only known how many times, while they parked me in a goddamned restaurant or told me to wander around among the shops, that guys -and women, too -had made me propositions and outright nasty offers - they would have shit their pants!
"I didn't worry about money. I knew I could always get some from my dad, or the Masons, or Jerome, Tom - a dozen. Even Burke, if I wanted to spread my cunt open and flip my titties in front of his camera! But there was a hell of a lot of money floating around on the border, too. I remembered when I was only 11, and this flaky character of a cab driver had offered me a hundred pesos to get into the back of his cab for a few minutes! Know how much a hundred pesos is? About 12 bucks!
"And, in spite of those queers and their big, metal prick, I still had it. I was only 15 - almost 16 - but I knew more than most women at 40, with ten kids! And I was in a mood to collect. The world - especially those rotten, fuck-crazy men, owed me a lot, and I was going to collect.
"I wasn't dumb enough to go right into Tijuana. My daddy had taught better than that. If they were going to booze it up and not drive back to the L.A. area that night - and we often went to the bullfights on Saturday and stayed over until Sunday - he got a motel in San Ysidro, or someplace close by, so that's what I did.
"Nobody asked any questions, although a lot of guys gave me the eye. I checked in, paid cash, then about an hour later, I ordered two fifths of scotch, and the dumb Mexican that brought them wouldn't have had brains enough to ask about my age. But I was wearing pretty heavy makeup, and I think I looked easily 21, because the time in the hospital had put a few shadows under my eyes, and I was thinner and older-looking.
"Anyhow, I had a few belts - and believe me - they tasted good, then I walked across the border and picked me a cab driver. There are usually a half a hundred of them there, in their beat-up cabs, and they are all crooks and pimps, or runners for the filthy strip clubs in town. I picked a young guy who looked like he needed a good connection. He looked hungry and sexy, but green, so I climbed into his cab.
"I told him right off, to let him know that I was 'Savvy,' that I wasn't paying three bucks to go into T town, but the regular fare of 50 cents. He turned and stared at me, grinned, and shrugged. 'Where do you wish to go, Senorita?' he asked.
"I played his game. I said, 'Quien sabe?' That means: 'Who knows?' in Spanish. That's where the name came from. The Americans - the cowboys, I guess - gave the word 'sabe' a lot more of the 'v' sound than the Mexicans, and it came out 'savvy.' It means 'smart,' that I know. He turned and looked at me, and I said, 'You name a good spot.' "But he was scared. Maybe he'd been burned, but he thought I was some sort of a plant, so he took me to the biggest hotel in town and dropped me. He didn't make any pitch and he charged me 50 cents.
"He had picked a good spot, actually, because almost all the bar customers at the joint are Americans. I knew I could make out. In Mexico - or at least, in Tijuana, nobody ever asks for an I.D. or about how old you are. The younger, the better. I remember once, when I was with my father there, while my mother was using the john, a kid about ten came up and asked my father, 'A ten-year-old virgin, Senor? Older? Boy or girl. Cheap. Five dollars?' "I sat up at the bar. I knew that I would get a lot of attention. I was wearing a mini outfit, and I let plenty of leg and crotch show. I ordered a scotch and soda, and I didn't even have to lay out the dough for it. A guy down at the end of the bar - an old bastard - hollered to the bartender to take it out of the dough he had in front of him The bartender looked at me, shrugged, and rang it up. I knew the old bastard would be making a move to sit beside me, and he didn't waste any time. He moved to the next stool and said, 'You're an American.' "I gave him a half-smile and nodded, and from there on, he was hooked. He gave me the old line 'What's a young, pretty thing like you doing here by yourself?' so, I decided to find out if he was what I wanted or not. I asked him what he'd go for to spend the night with me. I shook him up, because he almost spilled his drink while he thought it over; then he offered 50. I thought I'd really shake him up, so I said: 'Are we talking pesos or dollars?' "He took another sip, and his hand shook, so I knew he wasn't the one, and I laid it on. I said, 'Either way, Pop, you're way too low.' "He didn't notice, but I did: the bartender was bending a big ear my way. I had already tabbed him as a good bet, so I clinked glasses with the old bastard and said, 'Thanks for the drink, Grandpa. Now - get lost, before I call the cops!' He got the hell down the bar, but fast.
"As I knew he would, the bartender eased over, so he could still shine his glasses and talk to me. 'Senorita, if-' he began. I let him know the score right then.
"'No "if," Mac,' I said, 'I sleep-for money. Now, you just steer me to the big ones.' "He got so goddamned excited he almost dropped the glass he was polishing. He looked down the bar, like a scared kid, and without a word, he walked down and talked to a greasy-looking Mexican. But the guy was well-dressed. He looked like money. Right away, he got up and walked to a booth and sat down. The bartender came up and stuttered all over the place: 'The gentleman would like to buy the senorita a drink -' he tossed his head toward the guy in the booth - as if I hadn't been watching!
"The guy was with it. He didn't fuck around. He came right out and said, 'My name is Raoul Morales. I can offer you 200 dollars - but, not for me. So?' "So I said, 'Fine!' I told him quickly, that it had to be at my place, across the border - no other way. To tell you the truth, I was acting brave, but I was scared shitless. His face lit up like a Christmas tree when I said that and he waved for the waiter to bring us another drink.
"He just sat and studied me, and then he reached in his pocket and took out 200 dollars - all in 20's - and gave it to me. 'The place, senorita?' he asked. I gave him the name of the motel and the room number, and for a name, I told him that the customer should ask for 'Savvy.' That brought a big grin to his face, and for the first time, I looked at him as a man. He was good-looking, in a Mexican way - nice brown eyes, black hair, white teeth.
"He looked deep into my eyes, then took a little package out of his pocket and held it out. 'Por favor, Senorita,' he said, 'for another 200, would you take this to your room - just for tonight?' "I guess I knew what it was. I wasn't that dumb. I was still a sexy-looking chick, and this guy looked like he had all the hot blood he needed, but instead of going for me, he tries to use me as a messenger. It had to be dope. And it had to be the big 'H' - horse - heroin.
"'Who picks it up - ma nana?' I asked him, and he smiled even bigger and said, 'Me, querida. Who else?' "And that was how it started. I picked up 400 my first night there, and I didn't even have to sleep with a guy. I was a little pissed off at that, to be truthful, because my pussy was feeling fine, now, and I really went for this character, Raoul.
"He had everything figured. It was a small package, and before I left, he gave me some sticky tape. I went into the ladies' toilet and taped the junk up high, between my legs. I positioned it so I could walk all right, but so that no bulge showed. Raoul called a cab - I figured it must be somebody he could trust, and we went back to the border. I got out and joined the lines of people who were walking across. A lot of Americans leave their cars on the American side, because if you have an accident in Tijuana - and they really aim for you - you've had it! Guys have been thrown in jail and held for as much as 500 bucks, just for a fender tick!
"When I got back to the motel, the bar was still open, so I went down and ordered a scotch. The young guy that was tending bar was dying to make a pitch. I could tell by the way he kept walking down and checking my drink, but what he was really doing was taking a good look at my titties. They were showing pretty good through the lemon-colored sweater I was wearing, and without a bra.
"Then he got me mad - and I mean mad! The sonofabitch spotted a friend of his that came in. The guy had long hair and a moustache - and that was enough to burn my ass - and he stands by the men's room door and motions with his head. That goddamned queer bartender got out from behind that bar so fast, and they had their little get-together in the men's room - at least five minutes!
"When he came back, and the other guy sneaked out, I just wanted to get my hands on his prick - if he had one. I wanted to just run into some queer like him, to show him what I thought of cocksuckers!
"And the bastard had the guts to try to set me up! He came down and said, 'You with it, baby?' I just stared at him and asked him what he meant by 'with it.' "He came back with a weak: 'You know, baby. Are you looking for some action?' I felt mean. Real mean. I could have taken one of those goddamned glasses and busted it in his puss! I just reached into my purse and took out two 50's and put them on the bar, and said: 'Match that, you fucking queer, and I might let you smell my pussy!' "I guess I was a little upset because Raoul hadn't liked me enough to spend the night with me. I was getting hot, but not for any goddamned queer. I wanted someone to really make love to me. The booze was getting to me, too, and I suddenly realized that I was getting in a mean mood, and that I'd better back off. I was in the big time, now, with that package up in my room. And then, all of a sudden, I wanted that cocksucker up in my room! I wanted to get even. I didn't care who it was, so long as it was a goddamned cocksucker, like Steve was!
"I turned it all on. I apologized all over the place. I told him I was loaded, and was down there for a divorce from a guy that beat me - that ran after anything he could hold down.
"But he weaseled out. He said that he wasn't talking for himself, but that he knew a lot of guys that would really go for me, at whatever the asking price was.
"I told him to bring one out, and he began to stall. Then he began to back off. I noticed that it was close to closing time, and his friend had come in and sneaked down to a stool at the end of the bar. The bastard was actually embarrassed to be seen talking to a woman!
"I picked up what was left of my drink and threw it in his face. Ill never forget the looks on the faces of the drunks in the bar, and especially the look on his face, and on his queer buddy's!
"I walked up to my room, and I could have jumped into his arms, because there, waiting outside my room, was Raoul! He began to apologize for surprising me, and saying that something had come up that he just had to pick up the package tonight, but I didn't care. At least he wasn't a man-eating cocksucker. I could tell that by the way he looked at me. We went into my room, and I poured a drink for myself and offered him one, but he said he had to be going.
"I didn't want him to go, and I moved close and put my arm around his neck. He was nervous, and I could understand that, with the 'stuff' I was stashing for him, I decided to go all out. I said, 'No bedtime story - no stuff.' "I thought he would hit me for a minute, but instead, he took me in his arms and began to kiss me. I could feel his prick getting hard against me, and it turned me on - real good. I wanted him, but I didn't want any quickies, after what I'd been through. And those queers at the bar hadn't helped any.
"He began to warm up, and I unzipped his pants. He was running his hands up inside my skirt and rubbing the cheeks of my ass, and I never needed a fuck so bad in my life!
"When I got my hand around his prick, he was gone. He slipped off his pants and pushed me back on the bed, spilling my drink all over, and he just pushed up my skirt and rammed it home!
"It hurt like a sonofabitch, for the first few thrusts. I wasn't as healed as I had thought, but after a while, when he began to kiss me and really ram it deep, it was all right. But long before he came, I knew that something was wrong. I wasn't getting half the feeling, the kicks and the thrills, that I used to get. I was half-tom between cursing that no good sonofabitching queer, Steve, and still trying to work up something with my Mexican hotshot! But he came, slobbering all over me with his kisses, and he left me high and dry - panting, wanting, needing!
"When he got up and wiped his cock off with his handkerchief, I was too numb to do anything but motion toward the extra purse where the junk was. He fumbled around, got it, then gave me a quick kiss and left. I was at the bottom of the barrel. I didn't want to shove my finger up my cunt, because I couldn't think of a goddamned mar that I wanted to pretend was fucking me!
"I guess, right then, I'd have settled for that goddamned stupid dog that I had, a long time ago, with his rough tongue. But, there was nobody. The bar was closed. No place to go. No way out. A washed-up, fucked-out whore - and hardly 16!
"I walked into the bathroom and looked at myself in the dirty mirror. That's how I looked: dirty. I opened the cabinet, even though I knew I hadn't put anything in there. I slammed the door shut, thinking that I couldn't even turn on a goddamned Mexican dope-peddler, and wondering how the hell I could get out of this goddamned rat race!
"I wished to Christ I had a couple of those needles that those queers had shoved into me. I'd show them what they were really good for, by Christ!
"But all I had was those two bottles of booze, and I knew that they wouldn't even knock me out -not the mood I was in! But I forgot one thing: the doctor at the hospital had given me some pain pills! I still had at least six or seven left, although God knows, I had had to take them from time to time. But I had never had pains like I was having now. I mean gut pains - heart pains - soul pains - if I still had a soul!
"I emptied my purse on the bed, and the little green plastic bottle was a sight for sore eyes! There were eight of those little goodies - I know, because I counted them. I took a glass and filled it to the brim with scotch - no ice - no soda, just scotch. I walked into the bathroom and looked into the mirror again. I still looked dirty. Dirtier than before. I thought about a lot of people: Arnie, the dum-dum, Tom, Ken, the big shot athlete, Mr. Waxie, and Tom, and Jerome - and Steve. Funny, but I was so goddamned disgusted with myself, giving up without ever getting even with that cocksucker!
"I gulped the pills, all at the same time, and belted them down with a good swig of scotch. I finished off the scotch, and then I thought that everyone who commits suicide ought to leave some sort of a note. So, I walked out into that goddamned room and opened the drawer. There was a couple of envelopes and some paper, and even a ballpoint pen, so I sat down at the dinky desk and started to write. I guess I started about three ways. I began with: TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN. But, I wondered who the hell that included, and I decided it would be the fuzz, so I tore it up and began a new sheet.
"I started this one: 'Dear Daddy: I don't know what to say, or how to start or how to end - so fuck it!' "I tore that one up, too. I started one to Jerome, to Dale Mason, to Moira -and I tore them all up. I decided at the end, that I didn't really have anything to say to anyone.
"I closed my eyes, sitting there at the table. I remember thinking: 'Fuck 'em all. Fuck 'em! Fuck the shit out of all of them.' And then I put my head down and just took all the big, blackness into me. I gulped it. I sucked it in. I wanted it, and at least, I knew I had it!
"I don't remember them breaking down the door, or them taking me away to a hospital to have my stomach pumped out. I heard it all later, but what happened was, they had been trailing Raoul closely. Seems like he was pegged for a dope peddler and a big wheel contact for the border trade. He used anybody: unsuspecting tourists, soldiers, sailors, young chicks out for a good time -even a few hip characters who really worked for him, and came down, acting like tourists, and toting the stuff across the border. He was a big wheel, really - the border contact man - a lot bigger than I'd figured him to be.
"It was the federal men who broke into the motel room. I still don't know if I'm glad or not -but they did. They had spotted Raoul coming to my place, and by the time that they got the information and raided the joint, he had been long gone.
"I wound up in a hassle - the Mexican authorities pretended that they wanted me, and the American fuzz wanted me for sure. It ended up with me being taken to a jail in San Diego, and they booked me for violation of the Federal Narcotics Act!
"I spent three days in jail, or the hospital ward of the jail, while they pumped me out. And, for the second or third time - if you count the time I spent at Anna's joint, I had a lot of time to think it over.
"Know what? I decided that I was in over my head! I decided that I would act the innocent little virgin, and go back home and try it all over again! The more I thought about it, the better it seemed - me, with all the experiences I had had, back in my little town - just back in my little school - as the bigshot! The one who knew all the answers, but wouldn't tell them - unless I got paid!
"And, good old faithful showed up: my father!
"He was the most stupid or naive of all of them The cops knew what I'd been up to, but he didn't. I got to thinking that, maybe he was just like me! He thought he was so goddamned smart, and actually, he was nothing but a silly-assed baby.
"He raised hell with the police, and got a lawyer, when they told him what I was suspected of. He rayed at me to tell them the truth, when - if I had, I'd have had my ass in a sling for sure. I just played it cool. I decided that if I told them I'd been gotten drunk by some guy, then delivered to the border in a taxi, and didn't know anything about what he might have put into my purse, I could make it stick. I could also explain away the overdose of pills, by saying that I was so drunk, and the pains had come back in my vagina, that I didn't know what I was doing. I was glad, then, that I hadn't written the suicide note.
"And I made it stick. The police talked and threatened, but they didn't have any real proof, and in a way, my story made sense. My father and the lawyer kept pointing out that the worst crime I had committed was running away, and he even explained that by saying that I didn't want to live with my mother, nor with him, so it was understandable.
"The cops didn't buy it, but they had to release me. We went back to Los Angeles, where my father's apartment was. I didn't want to go back to school, but the school authorities were checking on me all over the place, so it was either that or skip town again. Right then, I was a little shook from the Mexico thing, and I didn't know where I'd run to, so I just went back to school.
"I stayed at my mother's. She had gone to work after they separated, so I didn't have to put up with her old shit. I told her right out, that if she bugged me about anything -and I meant anything - I'd just rim away. My father was giving her 25 bucks a week for my keep, and he was slipping me 15 or 20 for myself, too. It wasn't a healthy way to live, but at least everybody knew where everyone else stood.
"Moira started be friendly right away, wanting to know all about my experiences, but I didn't tell her. I wasn't too proud of any of them since I'd seen her last.
"I just cooled it for a couple of weeks. For one thing, I suspected that the cops were watching me to see if I really was peddling dope around school. I was goddamned sure of it after two girls came up to me and asked me to get them some pot, or the 'big H,' if I could. I told them to go fuck themselves and leave me alone, or I'd report them as users. They must have been finking for somebody.
"Then I began to get itchy for some action in bed. I called Burke and reminded him who I was, and asked him if he would still like me to pose for more pictures. He hung up on me. It surprised me, until I remembered that Steve worked for him, and I put two and two together. That goddamned photographer was a queer, too! No wonder he was so businesslike, and even looked disgusted at the way we posed with our snatches wide open! What some cocksuckers won't do for money!
"I got desperate one night and had Moira come over and sleep with me. I needed some sex, even if it had to be with her. She always was a hot little bitch, as much for women as for men, and she did me pretty good. I wouldn't let her use anything but her tongue and fingers, though, because I was still a little sore, way up inside my pussy. Every time I thought about that bastard - that queer cocksucker, Steve - I wanted to go down to his joint and kill him. The dirty sonofabitch!
"I was surprised one night to get a phone call from Waxie. The same old Waxie that had started me off! He asked me if I was still pissed off at him, and looking back at some of the other creeps, I decided that he wasn't so bad, so I told him no - not too much. He told me he wasn't teaching any longer, but was working for a talent agency, and he wanted to know if I could do any of the latest dances - the Frug, the Swim, the Monkey - all the go-go steps. I knew most of them. Moira and I had practiced them so that we could go pretty good. When I asked him why, I thought he was going to ask me to go dancing with him, but instead, he asked if I'd like a job.
"I didn't think I was that good, but he told me that I would be working high up above the heads of the audience, and I would be pretty free to do whatever movements I felt like, just so I wiggled enough and wore a brief costume. He said, 'Remembering that sweet body and pretty puss of yours, Savvy, I know you'll be what they want. You'll have to he about your age, but - who the hell doesn't?' "I wasn't too interested until he told me the job was out of town. It was in a beach city, down the coast, and it was near two big military bases, and he told me that if I still wanted to, I could probably pick up a lot of 'side money' for being a bed buddy.
"I told him to get the job, and if it was all set, I'd go. I warned him that I didn't want anyone to know where I was or who I was, and that I would work under the name 'Savvy' - and - that I had to be paid in cash. I didn't have any social security card, so it had to be that way. He told me I'd better get one anyhow, even if it was under a phony name, so before I went to work, a week later, I had one. It was under the name of Shelly Storms. Waxier also got me a phony birth certificate somewhere, that said I was 19 in a couple of months. When I got that skimpy bikini outfit on, and some heavy makeup and false eyelashes, under that blue spotlight, I looked way over 19.
"I went over pretty good, right from the first night, but I didn't have any chance to meet any soldiers or sailors or marines, stuck up there out of reach. Oh, they whistled and tried to talk to me, but the goddamned music was always so loud I couldn't hear, and there were a couple of bouncers there to keep order in the joint.
"I spotted the fact right away that there were about five 'B-girls' working the joint. They were there every night, hanging around the bar, dancing with the servicemen and hustling drinks, and I decided that that was where I belonged, not up in the sky, away from the action. So I told the boss what I wanted.
"He was an oily bastard, fat, bald, with a handlebar moustache that made him look like an old-time gambler. His name was Amato - or that's what he was using, anyhow. He just looked me up and down, then asked: 'You know what the name of the game is, Savvy?' I asked him what he thought they called me Savvy for, and he grinned and said he'd work something out. He gave me a tryout that night - after the joint had closed.
"He took me to a motel, and he surprised the hell out of me - he was easy to take. He didn't act grabby or overbearing. Instead, he told me he'd give 50 bucks, and if I played along with him, I could work the bar. He also told me that he owned a little motel a couple of miles away, where the girls could take any 'dates' they made, and he didn't even get a cut. His profit came from the 20 bucks he charged for the room, and sometimes he collected three times a night! He also had the girls tell their dates they'd like some booze, and Amato would sell them a fifth, at triple the regular price. He had a nice little thing going, and his spot was the favorite place of the military guys. Why not? Music, dancing, booze and then, if they had the money - fucking.
"Amato was nice to me. He sucked my titties first, ran his fingers around the lips of my cunt, then went down on me and worked me up real hot before he fucked me. It felt good to have a man again, and I showed him my appreciation by sucking his prick until it got good and hard again, then he fucked me dog fashion. I wanted to test out the membranes and the sore places that were deep inside me, and I told him to take it easy. He did, but he jammed it home hard and fast, towards the come, and it was okay.
"We stayed all night, and had a good time. He wasn't a bad guy at all, even if he was fat and bald and pretty homely. He knew how to treat a girl -even if he was setting her up to be a whore. I was going to like working for him, I was sure. He had some booze in the car, and we had a hell of a swinging time. He even told me that I should get 50 bucks a throw, and he knew a few of the 'brass' from the bases nearby who, though they didn't come to the joint to dance, often called Amato and had him line them up with a girl. He told me that for me, he would guarantee 100 a night!
"So, I became a whore. It wasn't a bad set-up. I would drink and dance with a guy, get to talking, and inside 15 minutes, I would know if they were just lonely 'mama's boys,' who wouldn't know a good fuck unless it was the palm of their hand, or whether they were the real thing. I never conned any of them. If they wanted to fuck, I told them I was a pro, and that it would cost them. In fact, sometimes, if I liked a guy, I'd cut the price down.
"Inside a month, I had a bunch of regulars that I could count on once a week, and I told Amato that I wanted to just concentrate on them - live at the motel, and take on whoever he sent over. He was happy with the idea. I'd been humping him a couple of times a week, and we got along real good. He was always good with the buck, and he thought it was a terrific idea.
"The one thing he insisted on, though, was that he had to collect the dough in advance, from his end, on the ones he sent over, and he got 25 per cent. That still wasn't too bad, so I agreed.
"We worked it that way for about six weeks. Funny, but I celebrated my 16th birthday in bed with a marine captain, with a fifth of Cutty Sark, and made 75 bucks, and Amato gave me 100 as a birthday present. But I told him it was my 19th and not my 16th.
"Then I got an idea. I had about 700 bucks, and I told Amato I wanted a couple of days off, and I went to see Moira. I told her about the easy pickings, and we got together with two other girls who were interested, and who we both knew were peddling their asses for nothing almost every night. I got hold of Waxier, and he agreed to rent me a small house on some out-of-the-way street, so nobody would be suspicious. I was going into business for myself! With all the hot pants guys around, and all the free fucking I'd been doing, I decided that I was going to cash in, while I still had something to sell.
"We agreed that, for a while, the other kids would stay in school and just work nights. Even then, they were only supposed to work three nights a week each. But I would be on call all the time, and live right in the house. I bought 300 dollars worth of used furniture, through Waxie, and moved in. I was in a good location, because it was a quiet neighborhood, where the cops wouldn't be looking for a whorehouse, yet it was easy to get to from Hollywood, Santa Monica, or L.A.
"Waxie was a little afraid of me being alone, and he spent the first couple of weeks there With me nights - especially after the girls had left.
"I admit, I was belting down at least two fifths of scotch a day - sometimes a little more. Not that I needed it, but I was alone so much - with nobody. I couldn't call my father, and I didn't even know where my mother was - and I couldn't have cared less. But, I was alone.
"I began to live for the nights, when there was some action. Waxie sent a hell of a lot of good customers, and Moira and the other girls were spreading the word, too. We charged what we thought they could pay. I went as low as ten and as high as 100. Moira and the others tried to be sentimental about it, and I think they set up a few jerks from school for as low as five. I didn't really care, because the nights they worked, they paid me a flat fee of 20 bucks. I wasn't counting on what they brought in one-tenth as much as what I took in personally.
"Then, one night - wouldn't you know? Who should walk in - Waxie had set it up - but my old man! And, of all nights, he walked in when Moira was working! I spotted him coming in, and I managed to duck, but I knew that blabbermouth would blow the whole deal, so I just walked out while he was sizing up Moira and Gloria. Gloria was 16, a good-looking chick, with a body like Sophia Loren's, but she was as dumb as they come.
"But, my old man stood there, with his mouth open, just staring at Moira. He knew her, all right, and he just couldn't figure it out - his daughter's best friend, working as a whore!
"I hadn't been feeling well, and I didn't know if I was really ready to face him, but I thought it would be better for me to spring the news than big-mouth Moira to blow it, so I just walked on into, the room.
"At first, he didn't notice me. Or, maybe he did, and he just didn't recognize me off the bat. I did look a lot older, because I was trying to, and also because I just plain did, but he blinked a couple of times and then did a double-take, and just stood there - limp.
"In a way, I felt sorry for the poor bastard. The last couple of times I had seen him, I'd put him through the meat-grinder, I guess. At Anna's, at the hospital, then at his own joint - I just felt sorry for the poor bastard. He looked gray. Maybe he had begun to look that way a long time ago, and I just hadn't noticed, but his hair was getting real white around the temples, and he was thin - skinny-faced, sunken-eyed - he really looked like he'd had it.
"He walked over, and there were tears in his eyes. He put his arms around me and actually cried on my shoulder - imagine that. He just cried, and he said in my ear, 'Oh, God, Savvy - please, please -!
"I didn't know what he wanted. I guessed he was ashamed and wanted me to leave with him. That's what I hoped he wanted. But I felt his hand slip down and grab my titty, and when he said, 'Oh, God, Savvy, baby - take me to bed,' I knew what he wanted. And, in a way, I was glad."
CHAPTER EIGHT - "Sex Therapy"
"Things moved along pretty good for a long time. We had no problems, because most of the men that came to our house were older men and married, and they didn't want any more trouble than we did. And they paid well.
"The parents of the girls didn't suspect a thing, and nobody wanted to become a millionaire, so it worked out fine.
"I had only one problem: I was getting fed up with sex, since I had to do it every night, whether I wanted to or not. And, a lot of the guys just couldn't turn me on. Since that surgery, there was a lot of loose flesh clogging the lips of my cunt - you know, like when a woman has had a couple of kids.
"That made it harder for a man to turn me on. Just rubbing the lips of my pussy used to start to stir me all up, but I could hardly feel it now. A man had to really get in deep with his cock before I really could feel it.
"But I had worked out the answer. I was drinking about a fifth a scotch a day. I never let myself get drunk - the customers wouldn't have gone for that, but I kept myself completely mellow and relaxed. It made it easy to take some of the men. I didn't try to come with every one of them, but there were a few regular customers that could make me want to let them hump me for free - but I didn't.
"I told the other girls that they didn't have to do it any way that they didn't want to. I know that all of us sucked cocks, that was no problem, if a guy wanted it. We would go all the way until he came, or give him a half-and-half, suck him good and hard, then finish him off with the fuck.
"I didn't mind it when the guys wanted to fuck me in the ass, but Moira didn't like it. I never heard the other girls complain about it, so I guess it was all right with them. And Waxie taught me another trick. He told me that most guys got really turned on when they could look into a well-placed mirror and see themselves in action, so I bought some big three-part mirrors, like they use in clothing stores to let you see yourself from different angles, and I placed them right by the beds we used. A lot of guys told me that they got a special kick out of that.
"But I was getting bored with sex as a business. It was losing its kick for me. Then one day I remembered Jerome and Tom and the handcuffs and hairbrushes, and I began to wonder if that would pep me up. Moira had brought one of those underground papers to the place, and I was glancing through it, out of curiosity, and I stumbled onto this page of want ads. Every one of them had something to do with sex. Some advertised for Lesbian or homosexual partners; some wanted to be whipped or give whippings, a lot of them wanted to get into sex groups where they swung both ways, with men and women.
"Out of curiosity, I wrote-to one of them and two days later, I got a phone call. It was a man, and he wanted to know if I had ever attended a bisexual party, where anything goes. I told him I hadn't, but if he only knew! I convinced him that I was on the level, and he gave me an address and told me that the meeting was to be the next night.
"When I got there, they were all pretty surprised that I was as young as I was. Most of them were in their late 30's and 40's, and a couple were older than that.
"It was a little different group because they were all the brainy type. They really were. One of them was a doctor and another man and wife were psychiatrists, and they were doing some sort of research. I thought at first they were putting me on, but they played a couple of games. One of them was supposed to come from that book from India, on the ways to love. I guess it's called the Kama Sutra. They called it Indian Checkers, and another version of it was called The Wheel of Love. A man and a woman would sit at a big board, and rest our hands on the board - just the fingertips touching it. On the board, there were about 50 pictures in fairly large squares.
"First, we would strip naked, and then we were supposed to tell the other person what sort of sex we would like, or what part of the body we wanted them to use - like mouth, tongue, cock, teeth, asshole, and so on.
"Then, we closed our eyes and let our mind take over, moving our fingers until they stopped on a square. It was kind of weird, sometimes. For instance, I was with this one man and he had a moustache, and I said I would like him to use his mouth and lips to make me come, but when my hands stopped moving on the board, one was on a prick, and the other one on a knife. But they were both on the 'Do,' side of the board. It was divided into two parts - or, it really had two sets of every object - one in a red color, which meant that it was something you wanted to do to the other person, and the blue picture indicated something you wanted done to you.
"The docs got real excited about the red prick and knife, and they asked me if, by any chance, I had ever wanted to cut a man's penis off - especially a man who resembled the partner I had at that time. It didn't take much thinking on my part to connect up what my mind was still saying: I'd give a year's growth to have a chance to cut the cock off of Steve.
"I got hooked on the 'club,' or whatever it was, and I began to read some of the books that the docs gave me on sex and psychology. I told you before, I wasn't too good in school after I began to fuck around, but this stuff really got to me. But it was like a game, and it didn't do much for me sex-wise. I was still bored as hell with sex, and this bunch wanted to play around with the mind, not the sex organs.
"So, I dropped out. But I told the psychiatrist and his wife where they could reach me. I wanted to dig a little deeper into some of the things they had been fooling with. I still like to read psychology and sexology.
"Then, that goddamned dumb Moira got all our asses in a sling. She got into a big argument with her father and walked out and came to stay with me at the house. Her old man sent the cops after her and when they cornered a couple of her fucking boy friends, they blew the whistle. One guy was her 'pimp' at school. He wasn't getting any money from her, but he was getting all the blow jobs and free fucking he could handle, just for steering some guys to Moira.
"So, the smart-ass cops raided the goddamned place. They only got Moira and I, because the other two were off that night, but, they also got Waxier. They booked him on procuring, pimping, contributing to the delinquency of minors, and some other charges, and me and Moira were charged with prostitution, with being 'incorrigible minors,' and in my case, they checked back on that goddamned dope charge and really laid it on.
"They brought my parents into the deal too, and the judge laid it on them good, for their own neglect of my welfare and supervision. I was given a year in a home for delinquents, and Moira got six months. And, we were both ordered to have psychiatric treatment.
"That was a big laugh, because the school was a training ground for thieves, prostitutes, con-girls and Lesbians. Half the girls there were on 'pot,' and quite a few on the heavy stuff. They had no trouble getting it, either. There were at least three men working there that were fucking the girls like crazy, and I personally did business with four Lesbians who worked at the place as teachers and guards.
"I also had sex with one of the supervisors, and he offered me a chance to pick up some good money on weekends, if I'd play ball with him. I didn't want any part of it. All I wanted to do was to make my time easy - do 'easy time,' as they say up there, and get out. I did what I was told, and when somebody wanted a sex favor, I got two for one, you can bet on that.
"I liked the psychiatric sessions. It was fun to shock and upset the young guy who worked with us. We had a lot of group therapy, because they just didn't have enough doctors to work much with individuals. Moira wasn't at the same place as I was - I guess because of her short sentence. But I found I was in good company. I don't think there was a virgin within ten miles of the joint.
"I got along with most of the girls, and the ones that wanted to get tough, I just finked on. I had enough buddies on the staff to keep them in their place. There was one old guy there - a sort of maintenance man - he was handy at anything like fixing electrical things, water pipes, heaters. And -he liked his booze and his fucking. I rigged a deal with him where I met him two nights a week - on recreation nights - and gave him his piece. My price was a bottle of good scotch each time.
"He had a hard time getting a hard on, mostly because he was half juiced up when he'd meet me, and also, he was scared silly that we'd get caught and he'd get fired. I don't blame him, because he had a good thing going for him. On the outside, I doubt if even a whore would want to take the time I always did with the old fart. I know if he'd have come around to my place when I was in business, I'd have told him to blow town, no matter how much he offered. But in that joint, believe it or not, the hardest thing to get was booze. It was easy to bring in pot or dope, I guess, but a bottle of booze isn't so easy to hide.
"He used to like to lick my asshole and my pussy from behind me, while he playing with his cock. Half the time, he never did get a real hard on, so I'd wind up sucking him off and he usually came 'soft.' But, he kept the booze coming, and I kept him coming, one way or another.
"I blew a little pot once in awhile, just to break the monotony, but it never did much for me. A couple of the addicts tried to get me to go for the big stuff, but I had had a taste of that jazz, and I didn't want any part of it.
"The time passed pretty good. I only did seven months and a few days. There was a big hassle over where I would go after I got out, and finally the court decided that I would be put in a foster home, with my mother and father both able to visit me on weekends, but I couldn't spend time with them away from the foster home.
"The people that ran it were pretty nice, but strict as hell and religious as saints. I tried to work on the man, but he told me off good. He told me if I ever tried again, he would call the authorities - I had a visit from a parole officer at least once a week - and tell them what I was up to.
"I began to get bored again, and pretty hot. There were three other girls living there, but they were all straight, and were only there because they had lost one or both of their parents, so I couldn't even have any Lesbian sex. I tried going back to masturbating, but it wasn't any good. I couldn't even force myself to put anything that was big or hard up my cunt, because I'd remember that nightmare with Steve and the weirdoes in the homosexual society.
"Then Tom came to visit me one weekend with my father. The same Tom that had taken me to the party with Jerome, where all the whippers and biters were. He had found out my whereabouts through my father, and had talked him into bringing him along to visit. Man, it was like saving my life to know that somebody that was young and good-looking was still interested in me as a person. He must have damned well known that he wasn't going to get any ass - not under these conditions - so it sparked me real good when he visited.
"I had lived there for six months and kept my nose clean, so my dad had the lawyer ask the court if I could go back to school, and he would pay my board in the home of a family that he knew that had a good reputation. It took another six weeks of investigation, but finally the court agreed to it. I still had to report to the parole officer, and I was not allowed to drink, visit nightclubs, or associate with anyone I had known in the past.
"Moira's people had moved away somewhere when she got out, and I don't know what happened to the other two girls, because they had never been caught, and I went to a different school than I had before. But the people I boarded with were pretty good joes, and after awhile, they let Tom come to visit me. He used to sneak me some scotch, and I had no trouble hiding that in my room. But I couldn't go out alone with Tom.
"Sometimes, though, they were decent enough to let us have the den to ourselves, and we sneaked in a little, but it wasn't real good, because we were both scared that if we were caught, I'd go back to the institution and Tom could be charged with something, because he was 22, then.
"One night, when we both were hot as hell and couldn't do anything because the people were in the next room, Tom knocked me off the couch. He asked me to marry him! He was going to leave school and work for his uncle, managing one of a string of men's stores that he owned. Tom said he had already talked to my father, and that he had thought it might be the best thing in the world, if Tom was sure he loved me and really was ready to help me.
"Even better, my father had talked with my mother about the idea, and had finally convinced her that this was the one thing that might straighten me out - marriage. I "I didn't love Tom, but I thought he was about the nicest guy I'd ever known, and I really thought that, if I tried, I could be faithful to him. Even if we couldn't, I knew that he was a swinger, and that we could make out all right. I wanted the chance, anyhow.
"We went out into the other room and talked it over with the Walkers. They said they would nave to hear about the legality of it from the courts, and they contacted the parole officer. There was a meeting, with the Walkers, with my parents, with Tom and his mother -his father was dead. And finally, we got permission!
"I had to continue living with the Walkers until all the details were settled. Tom had to have his job, and have a home provided for me before the court would release me from the supervision of the Walkers.
"Tom got a nice furnished place. We had a ball picking it out. Mrs. Walker always accompanied us, and she was as excited as if I were her own daughter. Tom liked managing the store and his uncle and mother seemed to like me, although they both said we were a little young to be trying marriage. But, they both knew that Tom had been a little wild, too, and they thought it was the right answer for both our problems.
"The big day came. We went for our blood test, arranged for the wedding -it was going to be a small one, but in a church - and I began to live in a dream. Tom and I talked about the things we would do - a car for me after he could afford it - some nice clothes - maybe a trip to Palm Springs or Las Vegas once every few weeks - things that I had never even thought about before. I don't blame anybody, but my parents never did any of those things; no rides to the beach, or to Disneyland, or boat rides to Catalina, or anything like that. We were just three people living together, with nothing in common, I guess. I don't even think we really knew anything about each other, so how could we like or love each other.
"I was sure it would work with Tom. I was already beginning to respect him - and he was so thoughtful and sweet, that I knew I would come to love him. I worried a little about whether we could be sexually true, but I knew that Tom knew his way around a woman's body. I knew we could talk to each other about sex, our likes and dislikes, so I wasn't too worried on that score.
"Then the roof caved in. The day before we were going down to get the marriage license, a man from the Health Department came out to the Walkers with an order prohibiting me from obtaining a license. It was also a court order that made me be committed to the hospital for treatment for syphilis! Nothing had shown in Tom's blood test, but they insisted he have more thorough exams, and meanwhile, I became a ward of the court and was sent to the detention ward of one of the big college medical centers for treatment.
"I was in a daze. I wanted to die, but I couldn't. All I could think of was: what lousy bastard had given me this goddamned crud. I wondered how long I had had it, and if the treatment would clear it up - if I'd ever be normal.
"Normal? I kept cursing myself for even thinking that I was ever normal. A goddamned 16-year-old ex-madam with syph! Normal? A slut that had had pricks stuck into every opening in her body, and who had sucked cunts, cocks, assholes and even armpits and balls - and got a kick out of it. A lousy kid that was already on the way to becoming a lush - at 16!
"The doctors told me that I had evidently had the damned infection for some time. They couldn't say exactly, but the police got into the act along with the health authorities. They wanted me to give them the name of every male I had had sex contact with. Then the goddamned policewoman came up with the idea that, because I'd been in the home for all those months, every inmate there should be tested. I was so damned mad and mixed up that I blew my top. I told her to forget the inmates and check every one of the goddamned persons who worked there, starting with the superintendent and working down to the janitor and gardeners.
"I wouldn't tell them a single name. Tom didn't know, and they jumped on my father, too, but he really didn't know, so they couldn't do anything with those two. They hounded the hell out of Tom, even after he was cleared, and the court had said that I was to have no visitors until or unless I cooperated and gave them the names of my male sex partners.
"I was in a trap. For the first time in my life, I knew I couldn't use my cunt to get me what I wanted from a man. What intern or janitor or anyone, would fuck a broad with syph? And I wanted a belt of booze so bad that it hurt. I began to raise holy hell with the doctors and nurses and they threatened to put me in a straightjacket if I didn't knock it off. I guess they would have, too.
"But I got to thinking: why take the rap for some sonofabitch that was still walking around, spreading syph? Why me? Why only me having to pay? I felt like a goddamned traitor, but I was desperate. I had to get some relief. I had to get some booze or dope or something, or I would have lost my goddamned marbles. I mean it. They treated me like I was a piece of shit - everyone, after I began to get noisy with them. I guess I couldn't blame them, because I really used the words on them - I called them everything from cunt-lappers to shit-pan pushers. I even tried to tell the doctor that the nurses were trying to get me to lick their cunts, but nobody believed me. I knew they wouldn't.
"One day, the doc came in and sat down near the bed. He wasn't too old, but he was stem, and he acted as if no woman on earth could get him into bed with her. He was - antiseptic - I guess that's a good word to describe him. No sex. No laughs. Just like the white walls of the room.
"He began to talk, and I knew I'd better listen. He said, 'Savvy, I want to tell you what syphilis is; what it does, and what you're fooling with. It's a deadly disease that infects the blood, and is carried to every part of the body. If it lodges in the brain cells, it can destroy them and make a mindless, raving lunatic of you. You have it to a strong degree. You need Very intensive treatment; more -you need to cooperate and allow us to take care of the rest of your body - your diet, your rest and exercise, your sleep, your peace of mind.
"'We need your fullest cooperation. These tantrums are only tearing you down, when you need to be built up the most. Now, I can't force you - nor can the police - to give your cooperation. All I can do is to tell you what you are up against, and you can take it from there.' "'There's no point in hating us, or taking it out on those who are trying to help you. You are the one who is responsible. That doesn't mean that you must pay for your irresponsibility by taking your life, just as surely as if you were to put a gun to your head and blow your brains out. My examinations have shown that you cannot have children - even before the syphilis infection took hold, but that doesn't mean that there isn't a fairly good chance that you can live the full life of a woman, once we have licked this thing.' "He stood up and looked into my eyes. I was starting to cry, so I turned my face away. He said, in a softer voice: 'I want to help you, Savvy. We all do. I hope you will let us.' Then he left.
"I lay there a long time, thinking about what he had said. I didn't want to pull out of it, but I didn't want to lose my marbles, like he said I might. Most of all, I wanted somebody close to me - somebody I could talk to - somebody who would just put their arms around me and let me cry it all out - somebody who would treat me like the little girl I still was - inside.
"But there was nobody. I was alone.
"I knew, all at once, like a big flash of light had hit me, that I was really alone, and that for the rest of my life, I'd always be alone.
"I got out of bed and went into the bathroom and locked the door. I had brought the drinking glass with me. I knew there was nothing else that I could use to do what I had to do. I looked into the mirror and I didn't even know the ugly thing that looked back at me. How could anyone else ever know her, if I didn't?
"I smashed the top off the glass, but I didn't look at it. I didn't want to lose my nerve and I knew that if I watched the glass cut through my skin, and I saw the blood start, I just might not have the guts. But, I didn't have the guts not to - to go back to the goddamned lousy world that I had walked into.
"I ran the edge of the glass across my left wrist two or three times. I could feel the hotness of the blood flowing, then I switched it to my other hand and jabbed it deep into where I knew the vein or artery would be. The blood was running down both my wrists and I could feel myself getting faint, so I took the jagged piece in my right hand and tried to shove it deep into the hollow of my neck, and twist it. But that was the last I remembered.
"But, my luck was still bad. My timing couldn't have been worse. I had picked about two minutes before lunch time to make my big move. They came into the room, missed me, and they smashed down the door and got me into the emergency room. I'm a loser, even when I try to lose.
"But one thing is still possible.
"Tom just might be waiting for me."
CONCLUSION This was the story of Savvy, a girl who eventually earned her name. Yet, we have used the wrong tense, for this was only the beginning of her story. In 16 years, she has packed a lifetime of experiences; yet, life, under normal conditions, should still he ahead.
What is to become of Savvy? No one can prognosticate her future with any degree of accuracy, because none of the sociologists, doctors, clergymen, lawmakers or psychiatrists, can predict the pathways of today's youth - and Savvy is a most complicated montage of the young female of today.
She is piteous in her cries for help, as we have heard. She, like millions of other youngsters, feels that she is completely abandoned and alone - so alone that eternal darkness seems preferable than the life into which she has been thrust.
It is useless to try to place the blame, for society itself is responsible. Worse, none seem willing or able to try to remedy the situation, or if any are, there is no clear solution to the problem.
There is no easy answer, nor do we pretend to have one. But the life of Savvy, so representative of too many of our young persons today, can be of some use, no matter what may become of her, if the persons who do care and can help, take a hard look at this hardened girl, and shudder as they realize that they are looking at someone they may know.
